All his life Jochen has had one dream and one dream only—to become a professional hockey player. Now after years of har...
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All his life Jochen has had one dream and one dream only—to become a professional hockey player. Now after years of hard work, he’s approaching his goal. Well…maybe a better term would be almost there since he’s playing for a minor league team and is barely making a livable wage. Still, he’s not complaining since he feels like it will only be a matter of time before he’s called up to the NHL. He just needs to make sure that he doesn’t allow any distractions to get into his way. Then a huge distraction plows into his life when Jochen is hired to help at a summer youth clinic. There he meets Rebel, a very sexy, cute and tempting goalie. The problem is both of them are deep in the closet. They both fear that coming out could hurt their careers. Besides, all they’re doing is having a little fun on the side and they don’t feel like it’s anybody’s business. Then just as they least expect it, their secret comes out in the most explosive way possible, forcing Jochen to admit just how much Rebel means to him. Will their love be able to survive the fallout, or will they lose everything they ever wanted?
The unauthorized reproduction or distribution of this copyrighted work is illegal. Criminal copyright infringement, including infringement without monetary gain, is investigated by the FBI and is punishable by up to 5 years in federal prison and a fine of $250,000. Please purchase only authorized electronic editions, and do not participate in or encourage the electronic piracy of copyrighted materials. Your support of the author’s rights is appreciated. This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental. Blind Pass Copyright © 2011 Stephani Hecht ISBN: 978-1-55487-917-5 Cover art by Martine Jardin All rights reserved. Except for use in any review, the reproduction or utilization of this work in whole or in part in any form by any electronic, mechanical or other means, now known or hereafter invented, is forbidden without the written permission of the publisher. Published by eXtasy Books Look for us online at: www.eXtasybooks.com
Blind Pass Blue Line Hockey 4 By Stephani Hecht
Dedication To Chris and Jase—thanks for all the uplifting emails. You guys rock!
Chapter One a few months ago, Jochen never dreamed Just that he’d be spending his summer at the hockey rink, much less in Canada. Yet there his sorry ass was, driving down the streets of Sarnia, getting ready to spend the next two months coaching a bunch of underage goalies. Goalies! Who would have thunk it? He was a forward, always had been. Not even as a kid had he stepped between the pipes and defended the net. Now they expected him to coach a bunch of waddlers. If that didn’t spell out strange, he didn’t know what did. Yet, strange or not, he’d gladly taken the job when all his other prospects dried out and he found himself facing a mountain of bills with no way to pay them. So that was how he found himself in this current bizzaro world. The overly cheerful voice on his GPS chirped to alert him that he’d arrived at his destination, so he turned into the drive of a house in one of the most upscale subdivisions he’d ever seen. Turning off 1
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the engine, he got out of his car and stared up at the place he’d be staying for the duration of the summer. All in all, it was a pretty nice house. Actually, mansion would be a better word. While the place didn’t sport a circular dive, fountain or stone lions, it stood several stories tall and probably had more bathrooms in it than Joe Louis Arena. The matching set of red sports cars parked out front looked pretty classy, too. Jochen opened the trunk of his much older and cheaper Cavalier, then hoisted his large duffle bag over his shoulder. After he slammed the lid closed and made sure his doors were locked, he paused for a moment to drink in the opulent image in front of him. Someday I’ll have a life like this. I just need to keep focused and don’t give up. Granted, the owner, Robby Anderson, hadn’t made all of his fortune by playing hockey, but it’d given him a good financial nudge in the right direction. Robby had wisely invested the money he made from playing and his numerous endorsements. After he retired from the NHL, he’d taken that profit and invested it further, this time by starting up a goalie school. While many had questioned his wisdom, in the end, Robby had the last laugh. Not only had he made a small fortune, but his goalie clinics were 2
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considered amongst the best in the country. Kids from all over attended and he had a long waiting list. While Jochen wasn’t a goalie, he’d been hired on as a shooter. In other words, a glorified puckshooting machine, whose job it was to fire pucks at the kids, so they could practice their skills. While it wasn’t exactly the most glamorous of jobs, Jochen knew he couldn’t complain. Since he played for the minors, he didn’t pull in a big check and he needed every dime that came his way. Maybe it wouldn’t be too bad. After all, some of Jochen’s best memories from childhood were of the numerous summer hockey clinics he took. So he should be happy to be back and coaching in one. For the most part, he was. It’s just that a part of him dreaded having to face the questions and the judgmental looks that were sure to follow. What team do you play for? The Vapors? Aren’t they a minor league team? What happened? I thought the Wings drafted you in the first round? What was that? Two years ago? God knows he’d asked himself those very same questions hundreds of times since he started to play professional hockey. After all, back home, he’d been considered a hero, a superstar, the one who would finally put their small, farm town on the map. Instead, he’d been nothing but a failure. Well, 3
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only a partial failure, since he technically did play for the pros, but he still hadn’t made it as far as they’d all predicted. Jochen Mueller, the one who was destined to be the next Wayne Gretsky, to be better than Crosby, Lidstrom or Zetterberg. In the end, he’d wound up relegated to a farm team and making scale pay. Jochen took a deep breath before he forced himself to walk up the steps and knock on the massive double doors. He almost expected a butler to answer it, so when a stunning redheaded woman opened the door, Jochen felt momentary taken aback. He recovered quickly and plastered a smile on his face. “Hi, I’m here for the clinic.” She beamed back, showing off a set of teeth that only the best money could buy. “You must be Jochen. I recognize you from your team photo.” “I don’t remember sending in a picture with my résumé.” “You didn’t. It was on the team website.” “Huh, I didn’t know the Vapors had even gone that high tech,” he half-teased. While the Vapors weren’t as tight-fisted as some of the other farm teams, they didn’t exactly go out of their way to spend money either. “Come on in and I’ll show you around.” She stepped to the side to make room for him to enter the large foyer. He let out a low whistle and 4
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immediately cringed, worried the vocal effects made him come off like some country bumpkin. “I’m Ashley, Robby’s wife,” she said. He shifted his bag so they could shake hands. “We talked a few times on the phone. It’s nice to finally meet you in person.” “Yes, I remember. You were the one who always had all the noise in the background.” A heat came over his face. “Sorry about that. I live with my cousin and he likes to think he can make a second career with his guitar playing. Lucky for him his slapshot is much better than his Stairway to Heaven.” She laughed. “That’s right. He plays for the Vapors, too. Why didn’t he come work for us this summer?” “He has this same sports camp that he’s been coaching at for a couple years now.” Jochen purposely left off that Aldrich refused to work for anybody else because he had a major crush on the director. His cousin was deep in the closet and Jochen had no plans on outing him. Not when Jochen knew from his own personal experience how scary that place could be. She led him downstairs to the lower floor, which had been converted to a dormitory of sorts. He hated to admit, even to himself, that while they were small, the rooms were a huge step-up from his apartment. His place was so bad that even 5
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most self-respecting cockroaches refused to live there. The other day he’d come out of the shower and found himself face-to-whiskered-face with a rat. The thing had been so frigging large that Jochen retreated and left the rat to do his worst. She paused at one of the rooms. “This is where you’ll be staying. You’ll have a bunk mate, but don’t worry, it’ll be one of the other instructors.” He peered in, noting how this room seemed slightly larger than the others. Two twin beds took up the center of the room. Not exactly comfy sleeping for a full grown man, but at least there was a full-sized TV mounted to the wall. Plus, there was a small private bathroom off to the side. He dropped off his bag and followed her as she gave him the rest of the tour. In addition to a huge kitchen, the house had a gym with state of the art equipment, an indoor Olympic-sized pool and a basketball court. Once they were finished, she took him back to the kitchen and grabbed him a cola. “When do the students get here?” he asked as he took the drink. “Tomorrow. The rest of the instructors are supposed to arrive today.” “How many coaches will there be?” “Counting you, ten. Eight goalies, plus two shooters.” He smiled. “It’s funny to hear myself being 6
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referred to as a shooter.” She studied him for a moment. “So, what made you pick this place? Not many forwards agree to come to a goalie clinic.” He shrugged. “I need some help with my scoring and I figured the best way to learn how to beat goalies is by going straight to the source.” “Ah, very sneaky. Some would say devious.” She wrinkled her nose at him. “I think I’m going to like you.” “You should see me play poker. I’m downright malicious. But before you think too highly of my Dr. Evil skills, you should know I also did it for the money.” “Yeah, the minors don’t pay very well. I remember that from way back when Robby played for them.” It heartened Jochen some to hear that Robby had once been in his position. Maybe that proved Jochen wasn’t such a loser after all. He smiled, suddenly glad that he’d chosen to come to the camp. The doorbell rang. She gave his hand a pat. “I have to go get that. If you want, you can go downstairs and get settled in. Dinner is at six and there’s a staff meeting right after.” “Thanks,” he said, but he was talking to air since she’d already rushed from the room. Jochen went down to his room and began 7
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unpacking his bag. Since there was only one dresser, he made sure to leave half the drawers empty. He did the same with the closet. Once he finished unpacking, he grabbed his cell and called his cousin. “Hey, I made it,” Jochen said as soon as Aldrich picked up. “Cool, what’s it like there?” Jochen cast his gaze around the room. Even though small, the furniture and décor screamed wealth. “Just like we’d imagined it would.” Like Jochen, Aldrich played hockey and, also like Jochen, Aldrich had been relegated to a farm team. Their shared frustration brought them closer than ever, even more so since they’d recently moved in together to save on rent. Aldrich let out a low whistle. “Wow, maybe I should have applied there, too. It sounds way better than where they have me bunking.” “Where’s that?” “A small room overlooking the rink.” “Oh, is it cold in there?” “No, ironically enough, it’s hotter than the armpit of hell. It smells that way, too.” “I’m not going to get totally excited until I see who my roommate is. Knowing the way my luck has been running lately, it’ll be somebody from the Cougars.” The Cougars were the most hated team in their 8
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league. Notorious for playing dirty, they’d been known to send members of the opposing team to the hospital. “It’ll probably be some rookie or kid fresh from high school.” “God, you make me sound so old. I’m only twenty-three,” Jochen reminded him. “You are old. Twenty-three is practically middle-aged when it comes to professional sports.” “I think you’re exaggerating that one just a bit. Some players stay in the NHL until their thirties.” “Yeah, but more of them are wallowing in our league.” Jochen rolled his eyes, now his cousin was exaggerating more than just a bit, he’d gone into full-blown drama king mode. Something Aldrich had perfected to a fine art. There was a reason why the whole family cringed whenever he showed up to a holiday dinner. They were all still talking about the time Aldrich threw the turkey, still full of stuffing, at his father. “Stop whining, it could be a lot worse,” Jochen said. “Oh really? And just how could it be any badder than it already is?” Jochen didn’t bother correcting Aldrich’s grammar, having long decided that was just a lost cause. Instead, he thought back to his team’s 9
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dingy, smelly locker room, the bus that reeked of diesel fumes, their handful of fans and the fact their own paper called them the most mediocre team in Lansing history. While they weren’t as bad as some of the teams, they still lost as many games as they won. So most people’s reaction whenever the Vapors were mentioned was a great big meh. He knew he still had to scramble for some answer though or Aldrich would never shut his yap. “We’re not on the Cougars. That would be really bad,” Jochen finally said. There was silence on the other end as Aldrich appeared to be mulling that one over. “I guess you have a point,” Aldrich eventually conceded. “Damn, you’re actually admitting that I’m right for once? I think I may need to call the paper because this is such an earthshaking event! The Apocalypse may be coming.” “Now who’s over exaggerating?” Jochen wasn’t ready to let it go though. “I’m serious. I may have to even bring Anderson Cooper in on this. Which really won’t be too much of a big deal, because we know how you’ve always had such the crush on him.” “You really can be an asshole sometimes.” “Just think about it, you’ll finally be able to 10
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meet your silver fox in real life.” “I’m going to hang up on your ass,” Aldrich threatened. Jochen laughed, it wasn’t very often he managed to get the upper hand on his quickwitted cousin. A noise at the door alerted him that his roommate had arrived. Still smiling, Jochen turned to see what he looked like. The man…or better yet kid since he couldn’t be a day over nineteen, had to be one of the hottest guys Jochen ever met. With short blond hair that hung stylishly over deep green eyes and a thin build, he had a sweet sensuality about him that sent a hum of excitement over Jochen’s body. The fact that his new roomie wore jeans so tight they looked nearly painted on, made the view all the better. His equally tight Team Canada shirt served to make the image in front of him sheer perfection. Something niggled at the back of Jochen’s mind. He knew he’d seen the guy somewhere before, but he just couldn’t put his finger on it. Then the realization came to him so quick that he nearly staggered back a couple of steps. “Ah, hell,” he said into the phone, not caring that his roommate could hear. “What?” Aldrich asked. “I was right. My roommate is a fucking Cougar.”
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Chapter Two
R
ebel’s first thought when he saw his new roomie was, Sweet Mother Oprah, how in the hell did I get so lucky? This guy is hot. Then he heard the man’s disgust upon recognizing Rebel and Rebel’s next thought was, Great, I haven’t even spoken a word and the jerk has already judged me. This is going to be a greeeeat summer—cue sarcasm. “I usually go by Rebel, thanks,” he drawled as he tossed his bag on the empty bed. Going by the clothes and equipment scattered on the other mattress, it’d already been claimed by his rude roommate. Which just suited Rebel fine since he preferred sleeping close to the door. A habit that may now come in handy since Rebel realized he’d be staying in a very hostile environment. Rudeness glared at him before speaking into his phone. “I’ll call you back later.” He disconnected the call before tossing the device on the bed with the rest of his mess. The 12
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entire time he continued to stare at Rebel, almost as if he were expecting a blitz attack at any moment. Which just shocked the snot out of Rebel since he’d never been considered close to threatening by anyone else. Even his mother’s toy poodle bullied him around, which said a lot since Eden had no teeth and weighed around six pounds. To make things even suckier, Rude just happened to be one of the best looking things Rebel ever came across. Lean, but with just the right amount of muscles, he also possessed a face to pant over. A thin nose paired with highly arched cheekbones and full lips made for a perfect profile. Add in the short dark hair and sharp, blue eyes and he could have been a model if not for the scowl on his mug. “Aren’t you going to tell me your name?” Rebel challenged, with a slight tilt of his head. The man pressed his lips together and, for a moment, Rebel thought he’d be denied even that simple courtesy. Finally, the guy said, “I’m Jochen.” “Nice to meet you.” “Actually we’ve met before.” The steely glint in Jochen’s eyes should have warned Rebel to shut up, but then again he’d never been good at taking a hint. “Really? When was that?” 13
Stephani Hecht Because, believe me. There is no way in hell I could ever forget running into a wet dream like you. “It was during the last game we played against your team,” Jochen snapped. Oh, oh! This isn’t going to be good. Rebel still pasted on his best innocent expression. “Really? What team are you on?” “The Vapors.” Fuckity! Fuckity! Fuck! See, I knew it wouldn’t have been a pleasant exchange. Then again, are they ever in hockey? “You’re last name is Wolf, isn’t it?” Rebel asked, his stomach sinking in dread. He could still visualize that last name, the yellow print stark on the black jersey. With good cause, too, since the body wearing it had spent the better part of the game parked in front of Rebel’s crease. So Rebel did what any other good goalie would—he wacked the hell out of the offender’s ankles and calves. “Yeah, and thanks to your stick, I still have a few bruises.” “I was just doing my job.” Rebel gave a nervous laugh. “Besides, whatever happened to what happens on the ice, stays on the ice?” Going by the filthy look Jochen shot, the guy didn’t share that view of hockey etiquette. “I guess I shouldn’t expect any better from a Cougar.” 14
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“Hey, that’s not cool. I was traded to their team right at the deadline, so it’s not like I’m lifelong buddies with any of them. Half of them don’t even know my name. They just call me The Goalie or Five Hole. Which is totally unfair since I have a .920 percent save average.” In fact, Rebel detested his teammates. More so, he feared them because he full-well knew that if they found out he was gay they would make his life a living hell. He didn’t dare share that info with Jochen though. The trick to being in the closet was to never reveal exactly who you were. Rebel guarded his secret so zealously that he didn’t even dare venture to a gay bar, not even the ones several miles out of town. Sure it made for some lonely nights and a hell of a lot of frustration, but it still beat the alternative. “Yet, even with that wonderful save average, you still managed to lose in the first round of the playoffs,” Jochen said with a tight smirk. That offense hurt so bad, Rebel almost let out an unmanly gasp of outrage. “Again, not cool. Like it was my fault my defense didn’t do their damn job.” “That’s the same excuse every hack goalie makes.” Rebel wondered how in the hell he could have thought the asshat in front of him was hot. Jochen had to be the biggest jerk Rebel ever met and that 15
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said a lot, considering who his teammates were. “At least we easily made it to the playoffs, instead of by the skin of our asses like some other teams.” Going by the way Jochen’s nostrils flared, Rebel knew he hit a sore spot. It felt so damn good to get some payback, Rebel almost did the frigging happy dance. Before he could get another dig in, Ashley came into the room. “Rebel, I didn’t know you were here,” she exclaimed, a huge smile on her face. She threw her arms around Rebel in a tight hug that he gladly returned. He’d been coming to Robby’s camps for years before he’d graduated to the role of instructor and had grown close to the couple over that time. So much so that Rebel often looked at them as a second set of parents. “Yeah, I just let myself in. I hope you don’t mind,” he said as they pulled apart. “Why would I? You’re like family to us. Even if you did leave our wonderful country to go live with the savages,” she teased. He gave a mock shudder. “Hey, it’s not any easier for me to have to live in the States. Thanks for all the care packages you sent. Do you know how hard it is to find ketchup flavored chips in Michigan?” From the corner of his eye, he could make out the look of confusion on Jochen’s face. Ashley must have noticed, too, because she 16
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explained, “We’ve known Rebel since he was so tiny he could barely stand in his goalie pads. I could tell you some really funny stories about him. You wouldn’t believe some of the things he’s done.” Oh boy, that kind of comment never led to any good. “I’m sure Jochen doesn’t want to hear that kind of thing,” Rebel rushed out, hoping to head off disaster. Unfortunately for him, it was already too late. The cow had gotten out of the barn door. The worms had left their can and just about every other clichéd metaphor. Jochen’s lips, which Rebel had once considered sexy, curled up into a wicked grin. “Oh, I don’t think they would bore me at all. In fact, I would love to hear every last one.” Rebel made a mental note to find a nice, big roll of duct tape, so he could muffle Ashley’s yap. While he loved her more than anything, her big mouth was going to be his undoing. Rebel flashed her a dirty look and she had the utter gall to wink back at him. She even grinned at him while doing it. Rebel decided that next Christmas she wouldn’t be getting more jewelry or perfume from him. It would only be savings bonds or socks from him for now on. “Ashley doesn’t have time for stories,” Rebel bit 17
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out between clenched teeth. “I don’t?” she asked as she innocently batted her eyelashes. “No, because it’s time for dinner and then the staff meeting.” Even though nobody had told Rebel the schedule, he already knew how things would run. One thing that never changed about Robby was that he…never changed. He ran the camp the same exact way he had ten years ago. The only variation being a few staff members here and there. Although to be totally fair, Robby did make sure to keep all his training equipment and techniques up-to-date. Ashley, AKA the little traitor, exchanged looks with Jochen. “Fine, I have the whole summer to tell him all about you.” If Rebel didn’t know better, he would have sworn that Ashley was playing Cupid, in her own bent way. That was impossible, for two reasons. Number one, she had no clue that Rebel was gay and, secondly, even if she did, Jochen was straight. Or was he? Because for one brief moment when they’d first met, right before Jochen had pegged him as a Cougar, Rebel could have sworn he saw a flare of interest in the other man’s eyes. Rebel quickly flicked those thoughts aside. Even if Jochen was gay and the attraction mutual, they couldn’t act on their feelings. While there 18
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may be a few openly gay players in their league that still didn’t mean it was safe to break out the rainbow flags. Most teams, Rebel’s in particular, were far from tolerant. Ashley wrinkled her nose. “You can be such a killjoy sometimes. Fine, let’s go upstairs and get some dinner.” They went up to the formal dining area. It would be the last time they’d be afforded the luxury of eating in that room and it would also be the only time they’d be able to relax. By breakfast, the kids would be arriving and then it wouldn’t let up until the end of summer. Robby was already there with a half dozen other staff members, all of whom worked there the previous summer, making Jochen the only new hire. Rebel said hello to them before going over to shake Robby’s hand. Even though he was in his fifties, Robby could have easily passed for much younger. His closely cropped dark hair held only a hint of gray and his tanned skin carried few wrinkles, although there were a few laugh lines framing his dark eyes. “It’s good to see you again,” Robby said. Rebel valued those words because he knew his mentor truly meant them. Rebel basked under Robby’s welcome, at the same time, taking comfort in being back in a familiar environment. After some of the hostility he’d faced in the 19
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previous months, it felt damn good to be in a safe place again. “It’s great to be back,” Rebel replied a bit gruffly. To hide all the emotions that were no doubt on his face, Rebel sank into one of the empty chairs and busied himself by filling his plate. Since he sucked at cooking, he mostly lived on takeout and frozen meals, so the prospect of having some real food made his stomach growl. It wasn’t even anything fancy, just baked chicken, but to him it seemed like a gourmet meal. So he dug in and concentrated on his food while Robby introduced Jochen to the rest of the staff. The other instructors were just a bit older than he and Jochen and were made up of players from both the NHL and various farm teams. Many of them had taught Rebel when he’d been a kid and they still often served as mentors to him. After dinner, they went into the conference room so they could go over the schedules and drill rotations. They all took a seat at the round conference table, Rebel somehow ending up next to Jochen. Which proved to be a problem from second one. Rebel knew that he should be paying attention like the rest of the instructors, but the entire time he kept having the insane urge to glance over at Jochen. Damn! Rebel must have taken too many pucks 20
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to the head or something. How else could he explain away the irrational attraction he held for somebody who obviously hated him? Jochen couldn’t have made his feelings more clear had he gotten a full-page ad in Hockey Weekly. That still didn’t stop Rebel from noticing how sweet Jochen’s lips looked. Or the way one lock of hair always fell over his forehead when he bent over to write down notes. Or even how he had the habit of wrinkling his nose, just a tiny bit, whenever something confused him. Then Jochen had to go and do something that blew away all of Rebel’s efforts to concentrate on the meeting. It wasn’t much really, just the tiniest of movements. But it still set Rebel’s body on fire. Jochen licked his lips. The movement was so fleeting, that had he not been already staring like some kind of stalker, Rebel would have missed it. Yet, the instant that pink tongue made a pass over those full lips, Rebel’s cock began to swell. Damn it, now was not the time for Rebel to be springing a woody! Yet there it was, pressing against his jeans for all the world to see. A heat covered his face as he tried to subtly shift in his seat to relieve some of the pressure. In the meantime, Robby continued to drone on, his words lost in the rush of blood flowing in Rebel’s ears. Even though he’d heard the speech a dozen times over, Rebel still felt a dash of guilt 21
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over not paying attention to his mentor. It couldn’t be helped though. Like any other able bodied nineteen year old, Rebel was a slave to his hormones and they all seemed to be chanting Jochen! Jochen! Jochen! Worried that somebody may be noticing his predicament, he darted a quick look around the room. The problem being his gaze immediately landed and locked once more on Jochen. Unlike Rebel, Jochen didn’t seem to be having any problems concentrating on the lecture, his attention focused entirely on Robby. Which probably should be counted as a blessing, otherwise he may have noticed the panting, salivating roommate to his right. Rebel tore his gaze away from his newest favorite piece of eye candy and told himself to calm the frick down. He tried everything. He even thought about things like the Golden Girls and Nancy Grace’s pantsuits. It almost worked, too. That was until he darted another glance at Jochen, only to find that…aw, geez…it got even worse. Or better depending on whose opinion one asked. Jochen must be a nervous chewer because he had his pencil up to his mouth and his teeth were at work. It wasn’t anything overt or gross, just soft little nibbles and sucks that had Rebel’s cock aching with jealousy. Muttering a curse, Rebel jerked his head in the 22
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other direction, only to find himself trapped in Ashley’s knowing stare. Rebel froze, horror flooding him. The new emotion mixed in with the already painfully present arousal, making for a combination that wasn’t nearly as fun as it sounded. Part of him wanted to curl into a ball of embarrassment. Another part of him wanted to launch himself at Jochen and rub against every available space on the man. Yet another sliver of Rebel yearned to run from the room and hide forever. It’s okay, baby, Ashley mouthed before giving him a gentle smile. Rebel let out a pent up breath. At the same time, he couldn’t help but wonder just how much Ashley knew. He thought back, frantically trying to come up with something he may have done in the past that would have given him away. Aside from his recent Jochen stare-fest, he came up empty. The meeting ended and everybody filed out. Rebel stayed put, both because his mind continued to whirl with all the recent developments and because Mini-Rebel still hadn’t gone into an at-ease position. Ashley came over and took the seat next to him. Rebel kept his gaze directed at his empty notepad. He knew it wasn’t the most manly position to 23
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take, but he didn’t dare look up, too fearful of what her expression might be. Would there be disgust in her eyes? Disdain? Condemnation? Disappointment? Each and every one of them would feel like a blow to his gut because he loved Ashley like a second mom. “Rebel, look at me,” Ashley quietly commanded. It took every bit of nerve Rebel possessed to obey. He lifted his head up and forced himself to meet her gaze. To his horror, his bottom lip even trembled a bit. Please. Please. Please, don’t hate me. I can’t help it. It’s just how I am. Tears sprang to Ashley’s eyes, but the judgmental expressions he expected to be there were absent. The only things he found were understanding and love. She reached out and cupped his cheek. “Have you told anybody?” she asked. Instead of answering her directly, Rebel found himself voicing his own question, “Did you guys hear that I was traded to a new team?” “Yes, Robby wasn’t too happy. He doesn’t think the Cougars are a good fit for you.” “Right before I went to their team, there was this forward who played for them, a guy named Sergei. Although, I don’t know him personally, he seems like a nice enough guy, plus he’s a terrific 24
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player. That didn’t matter to the Cougars though. They hated him before he even stepped one skate into their locker room. You want to know why?” “Because he’s gay,” her voice cracked a bit. Rebel nodded. “They made his life a personal hell. Even though he doesn’t play for them anymore, they still love to talk about some of the things they used to do to him. How they’d punch him or shove him around. One of them even knocked him to ground and pissed on him.” “Didn’t anybody do anything to stop it?” “A few times the incidents were reported. In every single one of them, it was made to look like Sergei was the instigator. That he started it and was the cause of all the problems. It stayed that way until they finally traded him to another team.” She reached down and grabbed his hand. It was only then that he noticed how much his fingers were trembling. “But now he seems to be really happy. He’s even in a relationship with one of his new teammates,” Ashley pointed out. “Yeah, and what if he hadn’t gotten moved to another team? Just because you put in a request to be traded, doesn’t mean it’s going to happen.” “Like, say if somebody was a goalie with a great save record?” she finished, understanding dawning on her face. 25
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“Exactly.” It didn’t pass Rebel’s notice that he hadn’t spoken the words I’m gay yet. He continued to dance around them, just like he always had. He knew that made him a damn coward and he hated himself for it. God, what he’d give to be brave like Sergei and his boyfriend. It would be so nice to once…just once, be able to go through life comfortable in his own skin. Instead, he continued to fake it and pretend to be something he never would be. Ashley let out a choked sob before she threw her arms around him. He sank into her, taking what meager comfort he could get from her embrace. As he closed his eyes, he wished, not for the first time, that he’d never became a professional hockey player. Because maybe then life would be a bit easier.
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Chapter Three yawned and reached for his mug of Jochen coffee. Even though it was only seven in the morning, the camp bustled with activity as the first round of students arrived. They ranged in age from ten to seventeen and every damn last one was way too chipper given the early hour. He sat behind a table, his main duty at the moment was registering the kids as they arrived. Rebel sat next to him, but they didn’t speak. It’d been that way since the staff meeting the previous night and the silence was beginning to grate on Jochen. He hadn’t thought it possible, but he almost missed the smartass comments the goalie seemed so fond of dishing out. To make things even worse, Jochen hadn’t been able to sleep the previous night. One look at Rebel dressed in jammies had seen to that. Although, to be fair, most people wouldn’t call a pair of light sweat pants and no top jammies. Jochen caught one glimpse of the goalie’s toned chest and tight abs 27
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and he’d been a goner. It didn’t help matters any that the pants had hung low on Rebel’s waist either. All night Jochen’s brain had been bombarded with various fantasies, all of them involving a very naked and willing Rebel. Going by the mutters and thrashing that sounded from the other side of the room, Rebel hadn’t gotten much more shut eye than he did. Jochen felt pretty certain it wasn’t for the same reason. He’d probably just been crabby because the day passed without him getting a chance to slash Jochen’s ankles again. “I’m going to get a refill. Do you want some?” Rebel’s voice cut into Jochen’s thoughts. Jochen jumped, almost spilling his nearly empty cup. “Huh?” He cringed as soon as the single syllable word passed his lips. It made him sound like some intellectually challenged jock. The really bad ones who didn’t even know left from right or how to tie their skates. He waited for Rebel to make some comment on it, but the goalie just smiled at him. “I’m getting a refill on coffee. Do you want some?” Rebel reiterated. “Yeah, that would be great.” “Two creams and sugars, right?” It shocked Jochen that Rebel knew how he took his coffee. After the reception he’d given Rebel, it was amazing the guy cared at all, let alone enough 28
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to notice something little like that. “Yeah, that would be great. Thanks.” Rebel took the cups and started to go over to the large pot set up on the counter. He made it halfway across the room before a loud squeal of excitement sounded. “Rebel! You’re here again!” A redheaded boy, who appeared to be around eleven raced across the room to stand in front of his apparent idol. Rebel smiled at the kid. It struck Jochen that it was the first genuine grin he’d seen on his roommate’s face. In the short time they’d known each other, all Jochen ever saw were tight smirks or fake, bright numbers. Damn, if the sight of Rebel’s dimples didn’t do weird things to Jochen’s insides. “Hey, Terry, how was the season?” Rebel asked. Terry beamed like he’d just been given the best gift ever. “I got three shutouts.” “Wow, that’s great. Was that for the Flint team you were playing for?” The boy’s face fell. “No, I didn’t make that team this year, so I just played house.” Jochen’s heart went out for the kid. He recalled all his own past hurts when he’d been cut from teams. Growing up, there’d been many times when he hadn’t garnered a spot on an elusive travel team. It wasn’t until he was older that he’d 29
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finally grown into a dominant player. He wanted to go over and find some way to comfort Terry, but Rebel beat him to it. “Hey, there is nothing just about house leagues. That’s all I played in until I got to high school,” Rebel said. “Really?” Terry asked hopefully. “Have I ever lied to you?” “No.” “So, you have no choice but to believe me when I tell you I was a mess of a player when I was your age. I couldn’t stop a beach ball if my life depended on it.” “Are you sure you’re not saying that just to make me feel better?” “I’m positive Coach Robby still has some of my old drill videos around here someplace. We could dig them up so I could prove it to you.” Terry laughed. “Nah, I’ll let you keep some of your pride.” “Thanks, now go over to Jochen and get registered.” Terry glanced over at the table. “Hey, isn’t that the guy who plays for the Vapors?” “Yeah,” Rebel confirmed. Jochen started to wave until Terry delivered his next zinger, “Oh, he’s just a forward. What happened? Did their goalie refuse to come?” Rebel coughed in an unsuccessful attempt to 30
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hide his laughter before he gave Terry a playful cuff on the back of the head. “Go on. You know they always bring in a few shooters for you guys to practice on.” Terry chuckled before he tripped over to the table. As soon as that kid left Rebel, another took his place. Soon a small crowd surrounded the goalie, making it apparent the guy was popular with the campers. A stab of guilt hit Jochen as he watched the way the kids looked up to Rebel, all of them wearing expressions of adoration. Maybe he’d been too quick in his judgment of his new roommate. After all, if kids liked him, how bad could the guy be? He must have some redeeming quality, otherwise he wouldn’t be so popular. Plus the way he’d handled Terry spoke of a soft heart that was capable of empathy. Something none of the other Cougars possessed. “Crap, I think I owe him an apology,” Jochen muttered. Vowing that he would take care of that as soon as possible, Jochen busied himself in registering the kids. After a few minutes, Rebel came over and rejoined him. He even remembered to bring the coffee. Before long, they settled into a system and managed to get all the campers’ information recorded without incident. Afterward, Jochen and Rebel went to the 31
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kitchen to grab a quick bite to eat while the campers settled into their dorms. Rebel went to the refrigerator and began to rummage around, looking quite comfortable at making himself at home. “So, just how many years have you been coming here?” Jochen asked. “Ever since I was ten. I haven’t missed a summer yet.” Rebel began to take lunchmeat and other fixings from the fridge. While it was still a bit early for lunch, Jochen didn’t complain. He expected the first day to be hectic, so he didn’t anticipate being able to sit down for a real meal anytime soon. “You never missed a year in all that time?” Jochen asked as he opened the bread and pulled out some slices. “Nope. As soon as I turned eighteen, Robby hired me on as an instructor.” “Your girlfriend doesn’t mind you being away the whole summer?” Okay, so maybe Jochen was fishing a little. It’s not like he could do anything with the information he dug up either. Even if Rebel was single, that still didn’t change the fact that he was straight. “I don’t have a girlfriend or a wife.” Despite himself, Jochen couldn’t help but feel a small thrill go through him at those words. So much so, that he decided to share, too, “Me either. 32
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I’m hopelessly alone. Well, except for Bangles. And even he’s a cat, so most days he’s just indifferent toward me.” Rebel smiled as he began slapping together a sandwich. “Who’s taking care of your cat while you’re gone?” “My buddy, Sergei.” Rebel paused, his eyes widening slightly. “As in, Sergei from the Hawks.” Jochen tensed, waiting for a slur or some other insult to come flying his way. It was no secret that many players had an issue with Sergei’s sexuality. “Yeah, you got a problem with him?” “No, not at all. I know he probably isn’t my biggest fan though. The Cougars don’t exactly have the best history with him.” It wasn’t lost on Jochen that Rebel said the Cougars as opposed to my team. “Do you even like playing for them?” he asked. Rebel pressed his lips together, as if searching for the best way to word his answer. He finally said, “I wouldn’t be upset if they traded me.” “Don’t you get along with them?” “Let’s just say that we’re not exactly best buddies.” “I would think they’d be happy to have you for a goalie.” “Yeah, especially since their last goaltender had the nasty habit of ending up in jail on game days,” 33
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Rebel replied with a tight smile. “Well that and because you’re great in net.” Rebel tilted his head to the side. “Did you just compliment me?” “I just pointed out a fact that you are already fully aware of. All you have to do is look at your stats to get that information.” “The Cougars don’t care about that kind of stuff. At least not as much as they should. They’re more concerned with other things, like who has the most penalty minutes and junk.” Jochen realized once again how he’d made a huge mistake in lumping Rebel in the same category as those other jerks. It made him feel about ten inches tall, too. “I’m sorry,” he blurted. “What for?” Rebel shrugged. “You weren’t the one who put me on that team.” “No, but I just assumed that you were a goon, too. I should have known the instant you could form three word sentences that you were nothing like the rest of them.” “That’s okay. We’ll call it even for the bruises I left you with.” Then Rebel gave him that sweet grin and Jochen knew he was lost. Damn, this was going to be the best and worst summer of his life. For while Jochen got to spend the next couple of months being around the cute guy, it was strictly a look34
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but-don’t-touch situation. “I have a question for you,” Rebel said. “I’m almost afraid to ask what it is.” “Why did you decide to work here? Not many regular players pick to spend their summers surrounded by a bunch of goalies.” In truth, Jochen had done it for a few reasons. In addition to the ones he’d listed to Ashley the day before, he was now willing to admit to himself that it’d also been to nurse his bruised heart. In the beginning of his and Sergei’s friendship, they’d flirted with hooking up. In the end, Jochen chickened out for fear of being outed. His hesitation had caused him to lose any chance of ever having Sergei romantically. Sergei fell in love with the captain of his team and they were now in a very public and very happy relationship. Whereas all Jochen had was his loneliness and Bangles. Since he couldn’t very well tell that to Rebel, Jochen just went with his usual excuse. “I needed the additional income. You know how much the pay sucks in our league.” “Do I ever. They could give me my paycheck via way of penny rolls if they wanted to,” Rebel snorted. “Actually, since we made it to the playoffs, we got a bonus. So, I get rolls of dimes now.” “Show off! We made it, too, and they still refuse 35
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to give us anything extra. Next, you’ll be tooling around in a car that’s only five years old, instead of fifteen.” “Yes, and wearing underwear that’s not labeled irregular.” Rebel laughed. “I just gave it up and started going commando.” The thought of Rebel being bare under the tight jeans he wore nearly made Jochen moan. Even though he tried to fight it, an image popped into his head. One that featured him dropping to his knees right then and there and, at the same time, reaching for Rebel’s fly. Jochen could almost hear the rasping of the zipper being lowered, so he could see for himself if there was any truth behind Rebel’s claims. Right before he parted his lips, so he could taste the goalie’s cock. Jochen had the sudden urge to go over to the fridge and bang his head against it until he knocked some frigging sense into his brain. The last thing he should be doing is lusting after another hockey player. Especially one who was going to be his roommate for the next couple of months. Jochen worked too hard to keep his secret this long, only to have his errant dick blow it for him just because of a hot ass and cute dimples. “All joking aside, I think you’re going to like it here,” Rebel said. “I already do.” 36
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Jochen’s dick jerked, almost as if offering its agreement. Rebel gave a soft chuckle. “Even if you’re stuck with a fucking Cougar as your roomie?” Regret slammed into Jochen. “I’m really sorry about that. I should have never judged you based on what team you play for. Besides, like I said before, you’re nothing like those guys.” Rebel picked up a can of Coke, started to open it and then paused, his lips turning down into a frown. “I never wanted to be on that team. In fact, I even tried to fight it, but it’s not like they give us much choice in those matters.” “Have you been able to get friendly with any of them now that you’ve had a chance to get to know them better?” Jochen hoped that maybe because Rebel wasn’t gay that things were better for him. That perhaps he’d managed to fit in somehow, even though Jochen now realized that Rebel was the complete opposite of those losers. All those hopes were dashed when a brief flicker of hurt passed over Rebel’s eyes. “It’s no big deal. I’m there to play hockey, not make lifelong friends,” Rebel replied gruffly. Recalling some of the horrible experiences Sergei shared with him, Jochen became concerned for Rebel. “Have they ever hurt you?” Rebel shrugged. “Just some of your everyday 37
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locker room hazing. No biggie.” Going by the tense way Rebel held himself, it actually was a really big deal. A wave of protectiveness rushed over Jochen and he felt the sudden urge to punch out the entire Cougar roster. Minus Rebel, of course. “There’s a difference between harassment and some fun ribbing,” Jochen pointed out. Rebel let out a sigh. “It’s not that bad. Certainly not anything even close to what they used to do to Sergei.” “What they did to him was criminal, so I would hardly consider that the bar you should use for comparison.” For a second he thought Rebel would argue that one, in the end the goalie set down his drink and rocked on his feet for a few moments before continuing on in a calm tone. “I knew before I even went there it would be hard. I’m small, blond and shy. All of the things guys like that hate. My own brothers used to tease me about the way I am.” “Let me guess, you were the youngest?” “Yeah, I have three older brothers. While they’re usually pretty overprotective of me, at times they could be jerks, too.” “But nothing like the Cougars.” It came out as a statement rather than a question, because Jochen felt pretty certain that Rebel’s brothers could never 38
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be that cruel. Or at least he hoped not. He couldn’t imagine having to grow up in an environment that hostile. “No, my brothers could never be like that. In fact, if they knew how the Cougars were treating me, they’d…” Rebel bit his bottom lip and gave a slight shake of his head. “They’d be pissed and want to do something about it?” Jochen finished for him. Rebel didn’t reply. He just averted his gaze as he continued to gnaw on his bottom lip. He worked the piece of flesh so hard, Jochen worried he’d make the thing bleed. Even though he knew it wasn’t the wisest thing to do, Jochen reached out and gently used his thumb to nudge Rebel’s chin down. It worked. Rebel parted his mouth, his lower lip springing free. Jochen’s breath caught as he found himself mesmerized by the temptation so close to him. All he’d have to do is lower his head a few inches and he could find out if Rebel tasted as good as he looked. The craziest part of the whole thing was that Rebel didn’t appear to have any intentions of pulling back. If anything, he seemed to be swaying in a bit. As if he wanted the contact just as badly as Jochen did. “Yeah, they wouldn’t want me to go through all that,” Rebel whispered. 39
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Jochen frowned in confusion. The past few moments of lust having made his brain mush. “Huh?” “My brothers. They wouldn’t want me miserable.” It wasn’t lost on Jochen that he hadn’t moved his fingers. They were still cupping Rebel’s chin. It felt damn good, too. The heat of the man’s flesh called to Jochen, almost as if begging for him to slowly explore every decadent inch of Rebel’s body. The one sane brain cell left in his head screamed at Jochen to pull away, that this was no way to guard his secret and that if he didn’t knock it off, Rebel would probably get pissed. Hell, the guy could strike out at any moment. Yet, Rebel did none of those things. No, he did the last thing Jochen was prepared for. With a soft groan, Rebel ran his tongue over his lips. As if he was preparing them for some really good action. A loud burst of conversation sounded from the other side of the door, snapping the mood. They jumped apart from each other and retreated to opposite sides of the kitchen island. A tense silence descended between them, before Rebel cleared his throat. “I better get going. I promised Robby I would help run movie night for some of the younger campers.” Jochen grunted in reply, but it was lost since 40
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Rebel already retreated. He moved so fast that he almost left a vapor trail in his wake. Jochen remained in place, his brain still trying to sort through everything that’d happened. Funny how a short ten minutes could change everything. Just a day ago, Jochen had been prepared to spend the whole summer hating his roommate. Now, not only did Jochen actually sympathize the guy, but he’d been two seconds away from kissing him. One thing was for certain, the attraction did go both ways. There was no mistaking the arousal in Rebel’s eyes. The only question that remained was if Jochen planned on doing anything about it.
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Chapter Four
R
ebel decided that it was all Jochen’s fault. The morning had been nothing but one colossal fuck up after another. From Rebel almost missing the bus, to him skating like crap. He even tripped and fell on his ass while demonstrating a drill. Something he never did, although it’d entertained the hell out of the campers. They were still laughing about it an hour later. Damn Jochen. If it hadn’t been for him, then Rebel wouldn’t have spent yet another sleepless night tossing around in his tiny twin bed. Every time Rebel closed his eyes and tried to drift off, the image of Jochen in the kitchen popped into his head. All Rebel had to do was think about the way Jochen’s eyes had darkened with passion, or the way his cheeks grew flushed and Rebel instantly went from sleepy to wide awake and horny. It’s not like Rebel could have gone to the bathroom to relieve himself either. While he and 42
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Jochen did have a private bathroom, the door was so thin that every single sound carried through. So if Rebel decided to indulge, it would be with the risk of Jochen overhearing. Since things were already awkward between them as it was, Rebel didn’t want to add to it. He skated over to the boards and grabbed a water bottle. Behind him, his small group of minions continued to work on their drill. His was only one of eight groups currently on the ice. All of them were working on a different lesson. They shifted every twenty minutes and Rebel knew the whistle would be sounding soon. That would mean a new group would be coming his way, so he’d have to do his demonstration once more. He only hoped he managed to stay upright this time. Robby skated up and grabbed the water bottle once Rebel finished. “You feeling okay?” Robby asked. “Sure, I’m just not used to getting up so early.” It was a bullshit answer and they both knew it. Part of playing hockey was dragging your ass to the rink at ungodly hours. Robby didn’t call him out on it though. “What do you think of the new guy?” Robby nodded in Jochen’s direction. Rebel’s heart thumped with nerves. Had Ashley mentioned something to Robby? The water Rebel just drank seemed to gurgle in his stomach as he 43
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studied his mentor for a clue that would tell him what the man was thinking. “Jochen is doing great with the kids,” Rebel replied carefully. He was, too. He took the campers through their drills with both patience and an efficiency that impressed Rebel. Already several kids had taken a liking to him. Which was remarkable, considering the fact he was a forward. They both looked over to the far corner, where Jochen was practicing a break away drill. He wore a dark red jersey that set off his dark hair perfectly. Well, it would have if Jochen hadn’t been forced to wear a hockey helmet. But even with that piece of red plastic blocking the view, Rebel had to admit that Jochen looked damn good. Robby nodded. “I think he’ll make a good addition. Even if he is American.” They both shared a mock, teasing shudder. Like Robby, Rebel had been born and raised in Sarnia. Although Rebel didn’t speak with a heavy Canadian accent like Robby did. Or at least he didn’t think so. It’d been a while since he’d been teased about having an inflection to his tone, something the Americans loved to do to their Canadian colleagues. The rivalry between the American and Canadian players was playful and light and carried over into the camp, the players and 44
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instructors all getting involved. One of Robby’s favorite activities was to divide the campers according to nationality and then have them skate relays. It was a game all the kids looked forward to. When Robby changed the subject to scheduling and dry land training instead of continuing to focus on Jochen, Rebel let out a sigh of relief. Ashley must have kept his secret for him. Rebel made a mental note to give her a great, big hug the next time he saw her. Robby blew the whistle, but instead of having the kids shift to a different station, he waved them all in. Rebel followed and hung out on the fringes of the group. Jochen skated up next to him and they both waited to hear what their next instructions would be. “Since we all worked so hard this morning, how about a little fun?” Robby asked the group. When a chorus of cheers were his answer, he continued, “Let’s do a shootout, US against Canada.” This announcement brought on a louder round of applause. Robby turned and grinned at Jochen and Rebel. “Okay, let’s see it.” Jochen pointed to his own chest. “You want us to compete?” “Yup!” Already the campers were separating 45
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themselves into two cheering sections. Knowing it would be useless to protest, Rebel skated over to the boards and grabbed his helmet, he put it on before skating over to the net. Jochen shrugged before he skated over to center ice. Robby tossed down a few pucks. “Okay, guys, we’ll do best of three.” Rebel nodded his agreement as he shuffled back and forth a few times to get himself centered in net. He then nodded that he was ready. Jochen grinned in return. Heart racing, Rebel relished in the familiar rush that went through him whenever he faced a shooter. The whistle sounded and Rebel skated out to challenge Jochen. This could prove to be interesting. The first thing Rebel noted was how well the forward puck handled, he maneuvered the thing over the ice, almost as if it were an extension of his hands. The second thing Rebel noticed was that Jochen moved fast. Really, really fast. Good thing for Rebel, he was just as quick. He matched Jochen’s advance, making sure to angle his body just the right way so the least amount of net remained opened. Then just as he sensed that Jochen was ready to shoot, Rebel dropped into a neat butterfly. Unfortunately, Jochen must have anticipated that move because he shot the puck high and to the right. Even though Rebel arched back and 46
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tried to catch the puck, he missed and it sailed into the net. The American kids let out loud whoops as they slapped the blades of their sticks on the ice. Jochen skated by, a cocky grin on his face. “That’s one.” “Just one, we have two more to go,” Rebel pointed out as he got back to his feet. “I’ll get those in, too,” Jochen sang as he skated back to center ice. Rebel flashed a rude gesture that got totally lost in translation since he had on his glove and blocker. It still got him some reaction when the kids began to laugh. Rebel shook off the last goal and got himself centered in the net again. The whistle rang out a second time. Even though Rebel hadn’t though it possible, this time Jochen skated in even faster. The little wienie had the gall to smile the entire time in, too. Jochen was in for a shock because this time, Rebel had a better read on the forward’s body language. So when he shot to the left, Rebel was ready. Rebel dove to the side, his blocker shooting out. He was rewarded with the satisfying thump of rubber hitting leather, the sound letting him know he’d prevented the goal. The puck shot off to the corner of the ice, safely out of play. The Canadian players let out a loud cheer, the noise drowning out Jochen’s muttered curse. 47
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Rebel chuckled before tossing out his own cocky grin. “That makes it one-to-one.” “I can keep count,” Jochen retorted, although his smile took the edge off his comment. “Good, because then you’ll be able to tell when I finally beat your ass.” “Just because you stopped one doesn’t mean you’ve won this match.” “That’s the sad thing about forwards. They just never know when it’s time to give up.” Jochen laughed as he took his place back at center ice. Rebel crouched in his best goalie position and got ready. Sexy or not, there was no way in hell he was letting that third shot in. It was a matter of national pride after all. It seemed Jochen felt the same way because he barreled in as if the entire Cougar’s defensive line was nipping at his ass. Rebel scrambled to get out to challenge in time, his delay making it so the space between them was much closer than he was used to. The closed quarters must have thrown Jochen off, too, because he tripped. Rebel let out a grunt of surprise as Jochen slammed into him, the force of the fall carrying them both back. They hit the ice hard, Jochen landing on top of him. They slid several feet, only stopping when their bodies slammed into the net. 48
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The kids from both sides burst out laughing, Robby even joining in. After a moment of groaning in pain, Rebel started to chuckle as well. Jochen remained sprawled out on top of him. A situation Rebel would have normally welcomed had it not been for the several pounds of equipment separating them. Jochen grinned down at Rebel. “I won.” “How do you figure? We both wiped out.” Jochen jerked his head in the direction of the net. Rebel craned his neck to see what he was gesturing at. A groan slipped past Rebel’s lips when he saw the puck resting past the red line. “That doesn’t count. The net was knocked off, so the play was dead,” Rebel protested, painfully aware Jochen hadn’t moved off him yet. “The puck crossed the line first.” “How could you have even seen that? We were both horizontal at the time?” Jochen cocked a brow and for one irrational second, Rebel could have sworn he saw a wicked gleam come into the man’s eyes. Shocked, Rebel did something he never did—he sputtered in outrage. “You are such a cheater,” Rebel accused, even as he held back his laughter. “And you’re just saying that because you’re a sore loser.” Rebel lifted his blocker and thunked Jochen’s 49
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helmet. “That’s because I didn’t lose at all. I’m a winner all the way.” Jochen snorted. “Did you get that last line from a cheesy car commercial or something?” “Nope, some self-help guru’s infomercial.” He shoved at Jochen and the guy finally got the hint and rolled off him. They both staggered to their feet just as Robby skated up. “So, did the goal count or not?” Rebel demanded. “I’ve decided to call it a draw,” Robby said, the words coming out in gasps because he was still laughing. Jochen narrowed his eyes. “There’s no such thing as a draw in hockey.” “My camp, my rules.” Rebel shrugged. “I guess we can’t argue with logic like that.” The kids all came up and circled them. The chatter became so loud that Rebel gave up all pretense of trying to have a conversation. He just nodded and smiled at what he hoped were the right times. The entire time, he couldn’t help but notice how close Jochen stood, their bodies practically brushing against one another. Rebel relished the contact, however minimal it may be, for he knew that at any moment they could revert back to their former cold relationship. 50
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Once everybody calmed down, Robby ushered the kids and other instructors off the ice for lunch. Rebel and Jochen watched them leave. Once they were alone again, Jochen asked, “So, what’s next on the schedule?” “You and I are assigned to clean up duty.” Jochen wrinkled his nose. “That sucks.” “Not really, because we get to relax and eat while the kids are doing their dryland training.” “That would be great. I’m tired.” “Yeah, I noticed you haven’t been sleeping well.” A flush came over Rebel’s cheeks as he realized just how telling his comment could be. He tensed, waiting for Jochen to call him out on it, but the forward just lowered his gaze, suddenly acting as if the ice were the most interesting thing in the world. “I guess I’m just having trouble adjusting to a new bed,” Jochen finally mumbled. “I can understand that. Your bed at home is probably much better.” “Actually, I sleep on a second hand futon.” Rebel nodded in understanding. His own makeshift apartment wasn’t well furnished either. “I get that. The only reason I have something halfway decent is because I live with my oldest brother. I rent the basement from him and his wife. I’m just lucky that they moved to Michigan, 51
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too, or else I would be living some place much worse.” “You really live in your married brother’s basement?” “Yeah, I guess that makes me pretty lame. It’s really no better than still living with my parents.” “No, I don’t think any less of you.” “I’m saving up for my own place. It’s just taking me a little longer than I expected. I was going to rent an apartment close to my rink, but when my brother found out what neighborhood it was in, he freaked. Plus, my family has always been a little on the strict side, so they seem to think they still need to look out for me, even though I’m nineteen.” Jochen smiled, but it was a gentle number, with no condescending tone to it. “You weren’t kidding when you said they’re protective.” It gave Rebel a measure of relief to see that Jochen didn’t think any less of him. If anything, he seemed to admire the relationship Rebel had with his family. “Yeah, the thing is it’s not just because they’re older because I know I’d do the same for them. It’s just how my family works. I just wish they didn’t think they needed to dictate every aspect of my personal life.” “I understand. Mine is the same way. Not a week goes by that my mother or sister doesn’t 52
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drop by a home cooked meal for me and Aldrich.” They skated around and began to stack the cones dividing the different stations. “You have a sister?” Rebel asked. “Her name is Brigitte.” “Ah, I should have known it would be a German name.” Jochen knelt down and began to scoop up the pucks, tossing them into a bucket. “My family is kind of old fashioned that way. Plus, it makes my great-grandpa happy.” “Is he from that country?” “Yeah, he immigrated right before the Second World War began, so it wasn’t easy for him when he first came to America. Given what was going on at the time, most people didn’t like German immigrants.” Rebel knelt down to help him gather the pucks. “God, that must have sucked.” “From what I hear, it did. The really ironic thing was he joined and fought for the US army, too. But he still faced all kinds of discrimination.” “I don’t get why people have to be so hateful.” “You know how it is, some people just can’t be happy until their holding others down. If it’s not because of the country they came from, it’s for something else. Take Sergei, for example. The Cougars didn’t care that he was a great skater, they hated him simply because of who he is,” 53
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Jochen declared with a savageness that surprised Rebel. They both reached for a puck at the same time, their fingers brushing together. They froze, neither of them moving, their gazes locked onto their joined hands. Rebel sucked in a breath as his heart raced in anticipation. “How about you?” Rebel asked, his voice a mere whisper. “What about me?” “Would you be able to face the same kind of hatred Sergei has?” Rebel tensed as he waited for the answer because he already knew what his reply would be. At that moment, he’d face just about anything to have just one night with Jochen. He knew it was stupid. He knew it was irrational. He knew it could be career suicide. And all for some guy that he’d basically known for one day. Yet Rebel couldn’t deny the emotions swirling around in his chest. He wanted Jochen—consequences be damned. Not that it ever really had to come to that. There was no rule saying they had to go public like Sergei and Kip had. Rebel and Jochen could have some fun and nobody ever had to know. Jochen had yet to answer, but he still hadn’t moved his hand either. So Rebel took a deep breath and put a voice to his thoughts, “What if it 54
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were kept a secret?” “Are you suggesting what I think you are?” Jochen rasped. “Our bedroom door has a lock on it. We could just act normal during the day, but at night, we could…” Rebel trailed off, too afraid to speak the rest. Jochen shifted his hand so his thumb could caress the back of Rebel’s hand. A shiver went through Rebel at the simple touch. “Are you suggesting that we have a summer of fun, no strings attached?” Rebel swallowed hard. “Yeah, I am.” Jochen finally gazed at Rebel and the desire burning in the man’s eyes nearly knocked Rebel onto his ass. Another shiver went through him, but this one was from the pure, raw need that now coursed through his body. At that moment, Rebel wanted nothing more than for Jochen to take him to bed and dominate him in every way possible. When a heavy silence stretched between them, Rebel couldn’t take it and he pressed, “So, what do you think?” A sensual smile curled over Jochen’s lips. “I think that this is going to be a summer that neither one of us ever forgets.”
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Chapter Five
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ater on that evening, Jochen went into the bedroom and stood by the side of his bed. He gazed down at the mattress, wondering just how he’d be putting it to use later on. Numerous questions spun around in his head. Had Rebel been serious when he made the proposal or was it just another one of his jokes? If he did mean it, then did Jochen dare take him up on it? After they did it once, would they really carry on all summer? Most of all, would they be able to keep their secret hidden? A sound by the door alerted him he was no longer alone. Turning, he found himself locked into Rebel’s gaze. They both paused, neither speaking nor moving as they stared at each other. Damn, it really wasn’t fair that Rebel looked so good. He’d taken a shower earlier and now wore a pair of sweat pants and a plain white t-shirt. Somehow Rebel still managed to make even that simple outfit look good. Then again, Rebel looked 56
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good no matter what he wore. Jochen suspected that the goalie could still appear desirable wearing a paper-examining gown. Rebel swallowed loudly, letting Jochen know that he wasn’t the only one feeling nervous. It helped Jochen some to see the normally cocky goalie being thrown off a bit. While he didn’t like seeing Rebel uneasy, his new attitude showed just how serious he was taking the situation. “Are all the kids in bed?” Jochen finally asked. When Rebel just nodded, Jochen added, “Speak up. You usually seem so fond of the sound of your own voice, I would hate to deny you that pleasure now.” “Yes, everybody is in for the night,” Rebel replied, his voice a bit harsh. “Good, then come in all the way and lock the door behind you.” Rebel obeyed, his fingers fumbling with the lock for few moments. Once he completed his task, he turned back around and gazed questioningly at Jochen, as if he were eagerly awaiting his next order. Well, Jochen would only be so happy to oblige. While situations may have dictated that his encounters be few and far between, during all those times he’d learned he liked to be the one in charge. The fact that the normally headstrong Rebel so easily gave up control, made Jochen’s 57
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already hard cock ache in anticipation. “Come here,” Jochen commanded. Rebel didn’t hesitate a moment, his feet immediately moving. He walked forward, not stopping until he stood directly in front of Jochen. Or maybe the better way to put it would be, he didn’t stop until their bodies were just inches from touching. While Rebel stood a few inches shorter, it only made it so they had the perfect angle for kissing. Rebel tried to do just that, tilting his head back a bit so their lips could brush together. At the last second, Jochen pulled back and gave a slight shake of his head. “Not until I say so.” The cutest whimper of distress burst from Rebel’s pouting lips, almost making Jochen smile. Oh yeah, this was going to be the best summer yet, Jochen no longer had any doubt of that fact. Rebel looked so pretty, mouth parted, eyes begging for some attention, his hard body swaying into Jochen. It was everything Jochen wanted in a bed buddy and so much more. When Jochen stroked the side of Rebel’s cheek and the goalie trembled with need, the picture became complete. “Please, I need you to touch me,” Rebel panted. “I am touching you.” To prove his point, Jochen ran the back of his fingers along Rebel’s cheek again. This time in 58
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addition to the trembling, Jochen garnered a moan, the sound going straight to his cock. “You know what I mean, damn it. I never took you for a tease,” Rebel said, finally showing some of his normal fire. “If I’m such a tease, maybe I should just walk away and leave you here alone.” It was an empty threat because there was no way Jochen was walking out of the room until he’d thoroughly fucked Rebel. The other man didn’t know that though. Rebel’s eyes grew wide with alarm as he shook his head. “Sorry, I’ll try to be more patient.” “Good boy,” Jochen praised. He decided to layer his compliment with a kiss. It was just a brief one, the barest brushing of the lips, but that small contact still made Jochen’s head spin. Going by the way he latched onto Jochen’s shoulders, as if needing the support, it affected Rebel the same way. Never being one to be short on words, Rebel let out a happy sigh before whispering, “Wow.” This time, Jochen couldn’t hold back his smile. Snaking one hand around Rebel’s waist, Jochen grabbed him by the ass and pulled him in tight. As soon as he felt the undeniable proof of Rebel’s arousal pressing into him, Jochen let out a moan of his own. Dipping his head down, Jochen pressed their 59
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lips together once more, this time making it a long, hard, deep kiss. Slipping his tongue inside, he allowed himself to linger, so he could savor the sweet taste of Rebel. Rebel let out another whimper, his hands digging into Jochen’s shoulders. At the same time, he began to roll his hips so his erection ground against Jochen. While Jochen knew he should give Rebel a verbal slap on the nose and stop him, it felt too good to have the goalie rubbing against him. So Jochen let the small infraction slide. It wasn’t until the need to breathe overrode his desire that Jochen broke the kiss. They pressed their foreheads together as they panted. “If we do agree to this, there has to be some rules,” he said. Rebel nodded. “Okay.” “First, everything stays in the bedroom. I have no intentions of parading my private life in the papers like Sergei and Kip.” “I feel exactly the same way. I don’t want to have to go back and become Cougar food, plus my family would freak if they found out I was with another guy.” “Second, I call the shots.” Rebel glanced up from under his lashes, the gleam of excitement unmistakable. “Okay, but only if you agree that I won the shoot out today.” Jochen had to bite the inside of his cheek to 60
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hold in the laughter. Life was never going to be dull with Rebel and his smart mouth around. Speaking of which… “You never do let up, do you? I guess we’re going to have to find some creative ways to shut you up.” Jochen put his hand on the top of Rebel’s head and pushed down. Nobody could ever accuse Rebel of being dense. He got the hint quickly, dropping to his knees. Unlike Rebel, Jochen wore jeans so there were a couple of moments of flyfumbling. Rebel proved to be determined though and soon had Jochen’s cock out. Rebel looked up, his expression clearly asking for permission. Jochen nodded once. While outwardly he presented a picture of calm, inside, his body burned with a raw need unlike any he’d ever felt before. His hand still remained on the top of Rebel’s head. Jochen spread out his fingers, reveling in the soft texture, he then gave the strands a gentle tug in a clear get-to-it message. After letting out a hum of pleasure, Rebel leaned forward and ran his tongue up the underside of Jochen’s dick. Pleasure shot through Jochen, forcing him to bite his bottom lip to hold back a yell. Rebel licked him again, this time his tongue sliding around to swirl over the head of Jochen’s cock. 61
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“That’s it. Just like that,” Jochen moaned. That must have been the encouragement Rebel needed because he parted his lips and took Jochen in. Rebel moved so slow, it was almost torture, his hot mouth sucking Jochen’s dick inch-by-inch. He didn’t stop until he’d taken in every bit. “Damn,” Jochen panted. He couldn’t help but be impressed. While he wasn’t huge, he wasn’t that small either, yet Rebel had managed it all without so much as a gag. Before Jochen could even relish that fact for long, Rebel pulled back, sucking in his cheeks at the same time. As Rebel began to set a steady rhythm, his head bopping up and down, Jochen stroked his hair. At the same time, he murmured words of praise to Rebel since he knew the goalie loved hearing them. Shit, if that’s all it took to get this kind of treatment, Jochen would give the guy a full novel worth of them. While he wanted it to go on until he blew, Jochen didn’t want their first time to end inside Rebel’s mouth. He forced himself to pull on Rebel’s hair until the man got the hint. Rebel settled back on his heels, Jochen’s cock slipping from his swollen, glistening lips. “Do you know how beautiful you look right now? On your knees in front of me?” Jochen asked. 62
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Rebel ran a tongue over his lips as he shook his head. “I could come just from looking at you like this,” Jochen confessed as he trailed a finger along Rebel’s jaw. When Rebel turned into the touch, a burst of possessiveness went through Jochen. By the end of the night, he vowed to know every inch of Rebel. To know what made him gasp from arousal, moan in ecstasy, scream with pleasure. “Strip and get on your bed,” Jochen ordered. Rebel rose gracefully to his feet and began to slowly peel off his clothes. Jochen watched the sensual show, looking away only long enough to grab a condom and bottle of lube from his top dresser drawer. He’d brought them along on a whim and now gave himself a mental back pat for actually thinking ahead for once. Once he was nude, Rebel went to the bed and flopped down on his back, his legs splayed open. It gave him a whole, debauched look that had Jochen moaning in appreciation. “Are you going to get naked, too?” Rebel asked. His hand went out to tentatively stroke his cock. Jochen took a moment to drink in the image in front of him. Rebel possessed a perfect body, lean and muscular. All the hours on the ice made it so he didn’t carry an ounce of extra fat. Even his dick was perfect. Long and thick, it curled up 63
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toward his stomach, a drop of pre-cum forming at the tip. Rebel used his thumb to wipe it away, before pumping his shaft a few times. Not needing any more incentive, Jochen began to divest himself of his jeans and t-shirt. Once he had them off, he kicked the clothing to the side, tossed the condom and lube on the bed and climbed on top of Rebel. “Funny how we seem to keep ending up in this position,” Rebel teased as he gazed up at Jochen. “Except this time you’re not getting up until we’ve both come.” Jochen picked up the bottle of lube and handed to Rebel. “Squeeze some of this onto my hand.” Rebel swallowed, his eyes flaring with passion as he reached up and took the bottle. With shaking fingers, he cracked the lid and squirted some of the liquid onto Jochen’s raised palm. Lowering his head, Jochen captured Rebel’s lips in a demanding kiss. At the same time, he reached between Rebel’s legs and used one finger to circle the man’s opening. Jochen thrust it in, swallowing Rebel’s gasp of pleasure. Damn, he was tight. So much so, that Jochen could barely wait to get his cock in balls deep. It took all he had in him not to do so right away, instead of being patient. The only thing that held him back was that he didn’t want to cause Rebel even one second of avoidable pain. 64
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After a few moments, Jochen added a second finger, spreading them out some to help stretch Rebel. Arching against him, Rebel let out a louder noise that would have probably alerted the entire camp, had it not been for the fact they were still kissing. Jochen pulled his mouth away long enough to give an admonishing, “Shhh…” “I’m trying. It’s just been so long and it feels so good.” “How long?” Jochen felt compelled to ask as he continued to saw his fingers in and out. “Six months and then it was just with some random guy I met online.” Jochen stilled, fear going through him. “Do you realize how dangerous that can be?” “I was desperate. I needed to make sure it was somebody who didn’t know who I really was.” While Jochen understood his anxious need for anonymity, he still didn’t like Rebel’s methods. “You have to be more careful. What if the guy turned out to be a creeper or something?” “That only happened once and I got out of his apartment as fast as I could.” Terrified at the thought of something horrible happening to the sweet man under him, Jochen gave him a hard stare. “Next time, call me. We’ll figure out a safe place to meet. I don’t want you ever going to those guys again.” 65
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Jochen waited until Rebel nodded his consent before thrusting a third finger inside his hot ass. Rebel let out a long moan. “Okay, no more anonymous hookups. I promise, just don’t stop.” “That’s a good boy.” Jochen curled his fingers, making sure to brush over Rebel’s sweet spot. He did that a few times, until Rebel became a panting mess. Giving him one last kiss, Jochen took out his fingers and grabbed the condom. Once more, he handed the item to Rebel. “Put it on me.” Rebel took the condom, his fingers frantic as they tore open the wrapper. When he slid the latex over Jochen’s overly sensitive shaft, it felt like both torture and bliss, the light touch nearly sending him over the edge. Once it was on, Jochen grabbed the lube and added a bit more slick to his cock, before he lined the tip up to Rebel and slowly pushed in. They both groaned as Jochen bottomed out. Once in, he paused so Rebel could adjust. Raining kisses on Rebel’s neck, Jochen fought against every instinct in his body that screamed for him to pound the other man into the mattress. Soon he felt Rebel’s muscles begin to relax as he yielded. Only then did Jochen lift his head and shift his weight back some. He slid his hands under Rebel’s thighs and spread his legs out, 66
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making the angle better. Once he had Rebel in the perfect position, Jochen began to thrust in and out. Jochen looked down, reveling in how he could see both his cock driving into a sweet ass and the look of passion on Rebel’s face. It made for such a perfect picture that Jochen didn’t even care that the tiny bed squeaked a bit or that the thin mattress bit into his knees. Since Jochen knew that neither of them would last long their first round, he issued another command, “Stroke yourself. I want to see you come.” “Oh, thank God.” Rebel sighed with profound relief. He reached down and wrapped his fingers around his cock. A flush built up over his cheeks and chest, showing how close he was to the edge. Jochen began to thrust harder and faster, wanting to find his pleasure at the same time. Just as he began to reach the end of his control, Rebel let out a muffled cry. He stiffened, ropes of cum shooting from his cock. “So good,” Jochen moaned as he came, too. He gave one last thrust, his dick filling the condom. Waves of pleasure slammed into his body, making it temporarily impossible to breathe, let alone talk. He even saw stars, just like in some cheesy, erotic novel. Jochen collapsed on top of his lover. Rebel’s legs were still spread in a bit of an awkward 67
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position, but since goalies were supposed to be flexible, Jochen didn’t think Rebel would complain too much. “We get to do this all summer?” Rebel asked after a few moments of recovery time. “Yes.” “Hot damn. I suddenly feel like one of the luckiest guys in Canada.” Jochen laughed even as he silently agreed.
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Chapter Six
T
he next few weeks passed by in a blur for Rebel. Not only were the days full of work, but the nights were some of the best in his life. He’d grown used to not only Jochen’s passion with lovemaking, but also the way he was outside of the bedroom. With each day, Rebel found himself becoming more drawn to Jochen. He wasn’t the only one who fell under the forward’s spell either. Most of the campers grew to like the easygoing man. Jochen managed to be knowledgeable, yet fun at the same time. While he didn’t have an outgoing sense of humor like Rebel, Jochen held a dry wit that was just as funny. When the first set of campers left, the new ones soon grew to adore Jochen, too. Rebel couldn’t blame them. He was willing to admit, at least to himself, that he was completely gaga over the guy. The only wrinkle in the perfect summer was the fact that it was getting harder to hide their secret. 69
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While they always made sure to keep their bedroom door locked and their embraces private, Rebel found himself constantly in danger of slipping up. Be it a casual caress on the arm, or a heated look, several times he caught himself almost committing a telling act while they were in public. Rebel felt frustrated by both the problem and himself for letting it come up in the first place. When they’d first started sleeping together, both of them had made it clear that it would be just a buddy-fuck relationship. So, Rebel had no business letting himself get sappy over Jochen. Yet he couldn’t help the feelings building up inside him. The ones that made him always want to seek Jochen out, even in a crowded room. Or to call Jochen when they were apart, just so he could hear the man’s voice. Damn it all, Rebel knew that made him come off as some chick from a show on the CW network, but he seemed powerless to stop it. The campers were settling in for the night and he was in the kitchen grabbing a snack. While dinner had been a couple of hours ago, Rebel had been dealing with a homesick ten-year old and missed the meal. So he decided to make do with a PBJ since he didn’t feel like cooking, even if it was just popping leftovers into the microwave. “Hey, there you are,” Jochen said as he came in. 70
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Rebel licked the knife clean before tossing it into the sink. He tried his hardest to pull off a causal pose, even though every cell in his body screamed for him to go to Jochen. Jochen proved to be a big temptation, too. He wore his usual jeans, but opted for bare feet and a tank top. It showed off his muscular arms perfectly. Rebel’s throat grew dry as he recalled all the times those arms had pinned him down to the mattress so Jochen could give him a good, hard fucking. “Yeah, I was hungry,” Rebel replied stupidly, his gaze still locked on Jochen’s arms. Jochen darted a quick glance at the door. Nobody must have been lingering because he came over and gave Rebel a quick kiss. Rebel pulled back in surprise, his hand going to his lips. The kiss had been nice—really, really nice if he wanted to be honest, but it was unexpected. Before then, Jochen hadn’t touched him intimately outside of the bedroom. “Aren’t you afraid somebody will see us?” Rebel asked. “Nobody has caught us yet, so I think we can risk one tiny kiss.” “Yeah, but somebody could walk in at any moment.” “Does that mean you didn’t like it?” Rebel lowered his hand, a heat coming over his 71
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face. “No, you know I love it any time you touch me. I just wasn’t expecting it.” “Hurry up and eat. We’re going out tonight.” “We are?” Rebel frowned. The night just kept getting weirder and weirder. “Yeah, since we haven’t had any time away from the job yet, Robby gave us tonight off. He suggested the bar, but I would rather go to a movie if that’s okay with you.” While Rebel felt for certain that Ashley knew something was going on between them, he knew that Robby didn’t suspect. He probably only suggested they go off together because outwardly they were coming off as good friends. “That’s fine with me. There is a ton of good movies out that I’d love to see. Are we going with an action flick or something scary?” “How about we decide once we get there?” Jochen suggested. Rebel nodded his agreement. He ate his sandwich, while Jochen grabbed a shirt and shoes and they went out to Jochen’s car. Once they arrived at the theater, they quickly agreed on the newest superhero flick. It turned out to be nothing more than high budget effects with a low budget script. In other words, something Rebel would normally enjoy the hell out of. Not this time. All he could do was focus on the 72
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fact that, while they sat mere inches apart, they couldn’t touch each other. All around them other couples snuggled, shared popcorn, stole kisses, yet Rebel couldn’t even reach out and grab Jochen’s hand. Knock it off. You were the dumbass who agreed to this. So don’t think that you can change the rules midplay. Rebel admonished himself. That still didn’t ease the ache of hurt building up in his chest. He didn’t realize the film ended until the lights came on and everyone started to get up. Rebel glanced down at his tub of still full popcorn, his heart heavy as he felt awkward around Jochen for the first time since the beginning of summer. “Well that one was so bad that I’m going to have to buy it as soon as it comes out on DVD,” Jochen declared. When Rebel just stared dumbly at him, Jochen elaborated, “You know, because it’s so bad that it’s good. Which means it earns a spot on the keeper shelf.” “Oh, yeah. I get it now,” Rebel replied with a forced laugh. Jochen gave him a strange look before they got up and filed out of the theater. As they exited, a blast of unseasonable cool air hit Rebel. He shivered and wished that he’d thought ahead and brought a hoodie with him. While he may be a hockey player, he hated the cold. He knew that 73
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was a bit ironic, but he couldn’t help it, even when his brothers ribbed him about it. They got inside the car and Jochen turned on the engine. “Sorry, this thing is so old that it takes forever for it to get warmed up.” “That’s okay,” Rebel replied dully as he looked out the passenger side window. “Are you feeling all right tonight?” “Sure, why shouldn’t I be?” “Well, because you hardly said a word all evening. Usually, I can’t pay you to shut up.” Rebel shrugged, still keeping his gaze locked on the window. “I’m fine. Just ducky.” There was a heavy pause, as if Jochen were mulling over Rebel’s response. Finally Jochen put the car into drive. Instead of pulling out onto the street, he directed the car to a deserted part of the parking lot. Once he found a new spot for the car, Jochen put it back into park, then turned to Rebel. “Okay, we’re not moving until you tell me what in the hell is going on,” Jochen demanded. Had they been in the bedroom, Rebel would have rushed to follow Jochen’s order. But then they weren’t in the bedroom. No, they were in some cold-ass car, in a deserted parking lot. So, Rebel decided he didn’t have to obey for shit. “No.” The look of surprise on Jochen’s face was almost comical. He even did that gaped-mouth 74
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fish thing for a second, before he recovered and snapped his lips shut. “Did you just tell me no?” “Yeah, I did. I know that may be a little rough on your ego, but live with it. Now take me home. I’m tired and we have to get up early in the morning.” Rebel really got snitty then, even going so far as crossing his arms over his chest. It was either that or really give into his temper and punch the dash. Going by how old Jochen’s car looked, it couldn’t take the abuse. “Why are you being such a brat?” Jochen demanded. Now it was Rebel who pulled an outraged face. “Did you just say brat?” “I sure did.” “Kids are brats. Puppies are brats. Sixteen-year old debutants who didn’t get the birthday car they wanted are brats. Full-grown men aren’t.” “You sure as hell could have fooled me. Because I happen to think I’m looking at one right now.” Rebel took several breaths in a vain attempt to calm his anger. “Just forget it and let’s go back home.” “Not until you tell me what’s wrong.” Yeah, like Rebel could tell Jochen that he’d fallen for him as something more than a good 75
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fuck. “Just leave it. It’s nothing you did wrong.” “Obviously it affects me or else you wouldn’t be giving me such an attitude.” “Please, just forget it.” Jochen reached out and grabbed Rebel’s chin, tugging until their gazes met. “No, not until you talk to me.” Rebel tried to pull away, but Jochen wasn’t having any of it. He just tightened his grip. Finally out of desperation, Rebel blurted, “I fucked up and broke the rule.” “What rule was that?” “I didn’t leave it in the bedroom.” Jochen gave a slight shake of his head. “I don’t understand.” “I tried to keep it just about fucking. To not let myself get too emotionally involved, just like we promised we would. It didn’t work though and now all I want is to be with you.” “What do you mean be with me?” Rebel let out a growl of frustration. Jochen picked a hell of a time to be slow on the draw. “I want to have a real relationship, just like everybody else in the world. I’m sick of us having to hide what we do, like we’re each other’s dirty little secret.” “We are each other’s secret.” “Why? Because we’re gay? So the fuck what? Maybe we didn’t choose to be this way, but it’s 76
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who we are, so why in the hell should we be made to feel ashamed of it?” Jochen reached up with his other hand and cupped Rebel’s cheeks. “Babe, if this comes out about us, being ashamed is going to be the least of your worries. Your team will make you suffer. I remember how it was when Sergei went through that. It would kill me to have the same thing happen to you.” “It doesn’t matter to me anymore. I care more about you than I fear them.” “What about your family? You’ve told me numerous times that they’d freak if they found out you were gay.” “It’ll be tough for them at first, but I’m sure if I break it to them gently, they’ll eventually come around.” Or at least he hoped they would. They were really religious and never hid the fact that they considered homosexuality a sin, even going so far as to call it the work of the devil. But surely they’d changed their views once they found out that one of their own was gay. Reaching up to put his fingers around Jochen’s wrist, Rebel took a deep breath and took the biggest risk of his life. “Please, tell me that maybe, just maybe, you could feel the same way about me. That being with me is worth all the risks we’ll take by coming out.” 77
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Jochen didn’t say anything. He just blinked a few times, his face as impassive as an old style goalie mask. Despair crashed into Rebel as his heart shattered. He took in a shuddering breath as he began to shrink back. “I do feel the same way about you,” Jochen croaked. Rebel paused in mid-retreat, his pulse racing with renewed hope. “You do?” “Damn it, but yes I do.” “You don’t need to sound so happy about it,” Rebel snapped sarcastically. “I’m happy that you feel the same way about me. I’m just scared as hell about what will happen to you once this all gets out.” “You sure you’re still not worried about your career?” Rebel recalled all the nights they’d lain together while Jochen talked about his aspiration to be called up to the NHL. It was almost like an obsession to the guy. Jochen blinked, a bewildered expression crossing his face. “No, strangely enough, that doesn’t matter so much to me anymore. I care more about you.” Joy surged through Rebel, making him feel fifty pounds lighter. “Holy crap, you really mean that, don’t you?” 78
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By way of answer, Jochen brought his head down and pressed their lips together. Rebel didn’t miss a beat, one hand snaking out to cup the back of Jochen’s head. Rebel returned the kiss, allowing all his passion and desires to carry over. They made out for a few moments, before they parted just enough to let the other breathe. “We have to be careful how we go public about this though. I still don’t want you going back to that locker room unless we know it’s perfectly safe,” Jochen said. “Okay.” “Let me call Sergei in the morning and ask him for some advice. Then we can decide on a plan of action.” Rebel nodded. He was so happy that at that moment, he’d agree to just about anything. Jochen smiled, a wicked gleam coming over his eyes. “Do you know what I think?” “What?” Rebel asked, a spike of arousal hitting him. “I think that we should celebrate.” “And just how do you want to do that?” “Like this.” Before Rebel could ask him to expound any further, Jochen bent over and began to fumble with the fly of Rebel’s jeans. A gasp of shock burst from Rebel’s lips as he cast a furtive glance around the parking lot. Finding it still deserted, save for 79
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some empty cars and a van, he relaxed. “You are not going to give me a blowjob right here in the car,” Rebel protested, even as he felt the zipper to his pants being lowered. Jochen pulled out Rebel’s cock and blew on the tip. “Oh, I think I am.” “Shit, when you decide to come out, you really, really come out.” The last word came out as a yelp, pleasure shooting through Rebel as a warm heat enveloped his cock. Looking down, he encountered a perfect picture of Jochen, his head tilted slightly as his lips stretched around Rebel’s width. For once Rebel didn’t have to worry about keeping it quiet, so he let out a long moan as Jochen began to suck him off. Due to the awkward angle and the urgency of the situation, it wasn’t the best blowjob Jochen had ever given him, but Rebel still treasured it. For once the pleasure was freely given, without any concessions or rules. It was just about two guys who cared for each other and wanted something more than a quick, meaningless fuck. While Rebel wanted the moment to last forever, he soon found his pleasure cresting. He gasped out a warning, but Jochen didn’t pull back, he only sucked faster and harder. Rebel came, screaming Jochen’s name as he did so. Thrusting up, he released into Jochen’s eager 80
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mouth. Jochen continued to suck until every drop had been wrung from Rebel. “We really need to celebrate more often, because that was fan-frigging-tastic,” Rebel breathed. Jochen tucked him back in and did his pants back up, before sitting up. Rebel brought him in for a deep lingering kiss that involved a lot of tongues and love bites. “What about you?” Rebel asked, one hand going down to cup Jochen’s hard cock. “You can take care of me all night.” “I think I like the sound of that idea. Then in the morning, we can decide how we can come out, while keeping my ass intact.” “I hope so,” Jochen gave a sly look. “I’ve become pretty attached to that ass. It belongs to me now and I’m not going to let some Cougar get it.”
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Chapter Seven sat up on one elbow and gazed down at a Jochen sleeping Rebel. While the sun had risen, the rays coming in weakly through the curtains covering the one window of the room, it was still early. Too early for anyone who was sane to be up, yet there Jochen was, wide awake with nothing better to do than to stare at his lover. Not that he was complaining—much. Sure it may be cramped on the twin bed. It barely held one grown man, let alone two. It was a small price to pay to be able to hold Rebel in his arms. Using his free hand, Jochen lightly traced Rebel’s brow. The goalie barely stirred, no doubt worn out from their marathon sex session. After they’d come home, they’d gone down to their room and celebrated by screwing their brains out. Or as Rebel now liked to put it, they’d made love like two horny bunnies in heat. Jochen sighed happily, still not able to believe 82
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how quickly his life had changed and for the better. When he’d first arrived at the camp, he thought he knew the course to take in order to be happy. Then a smartass, blond with a wicked sense of humor had blown into Jochen’s life and shown him just how wrong he’d been. Money. Fame. Fancy cars. An NHL contract. None of them could compare to the happiness he felt when he had Rebel in his arms. Maybe they’d only known each other a few weeks, but it was enough for Jochen to know that there was a real possibility that he could have something special if he just took the chance. Adele’s Rolling in the Deep began to play loudly, alerting Jochen he had a call. Wondering who could be calling at such an early hour, he rolled out of bed and scrambled around, until he found his cell in his jeans pocket. He pulled it out, frowning when he saw it was Aldrich. “Hey, what’s up?” Jochen greeted. “You are. As in up on the net. And not in a good superstar hockey player way, but a bad Kardashian worthy scandal kind of way,” Aldrich replied in an urgent tone. “What in the hell are you talking about?” “You have your laptop nearby?” “Of course I do.” “Then fire it up and go to the Net Wanker blog.” Jochen grunted in disgust. “Why would I want 83
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to do that? That guy who runs it is an asshat.” “Just do it.” After rolling his eyes, Jochen fired up his computer and waited for the internet to come up. Rebel rolled over and rubbed his eyes. “What’s going on?” “I don’t know. Aldrich is freaking out about something.” “You will be, too, once you know what’s going on,” Aldrich snapped. “Why are you getting on your computer?” Rebel asked as he got up. Wrapping the blanket around his waist, he came up behind Jochen and peered over his shoulder. “What are you going to the Net Wanker for? That guy is a real asshat. The only things he ever writes about are all gossipy or just plain mean. One time, he even called me fat.” Jochen bit back a laugh. “That’s only because he’s never seen you naked. I can assure you that you have a damn hot body.” “Ewww….” Aldrich groaned. “I’m still on the phone with you and I can hear everything you guys are saying.” Jochen laughed, the smile staying on his face until the blog started to slowly load onto his computer. Then once he saw what was on the site, his stomach clenched in dread. One-by-one different pictures of he and Rebel popped up onto 84
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the screen. The images were a bit grainy and blurry, due to the fact they were taken at night and at what appeared to be a bit of a distance. They were still clear enough to show a distinct visual, and it was a damning one. They’d all been taken the night before and they provided a snapshot-by-snapshot replay of their encounter in the car. It started with them arguing, moved on to an image of Jochen cupping Rebel’s face, then went on to one of them making out. The next one brought a flush to Jochen’s face, even though he wasn’t in it, because it showed Rebel, a look of lust on his face as he gazed down at his lap. Going by that it wouldn’t take a genius to figure out where Jochen had gone. Especially since the final image showed Rebel, head thrown back, mouth open in a soundless cry of passion. “Do I really get that goofy look on my face when I come?” Rebel asked. Jochen turned to ask him how he could joke at a time like this, only to find Rebel pale, his eyes wide with shock. His bottom lip trembled as his gaze traveled over the screen. His joking must have been a lame attempt at a coping mechanism because the next time Rebel spoke, his voice was laced with hysteria, “Oh, shit. Oh, shit. Oh, shit. How in the hell did somebody manage to get pictures of us together? We checked and nobody was around. Unless of course somebody was 85
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hiding out in that van and spying on us, which takes creepy to a whole new level. That would make this guy an asshat and a stalker.” “He doesn’t even know the half of this,” Aldrich cut in. “News of this has already spread all over the web. Even some of the major sports networks have picked up the story. My mom called me this morning to wake me up and tell me about it.” If Aldrich’s mom knew, that would mean that Jochen’s did, too. A bit of a sticky situation given he’d never told her he was gay. As important as that was, Jochen quickly filed that worry away for later since Rebel had begun to tremble violently. “Thanks for the heads up. I’ll call you later,” Jochen told Aldrich. Jochen hung up the phone and turned to Rebel. Pulling the younger man into his arms, Jochen gave him a tight squeeze. “It’ll be okay. We were going to go public, this just pushed us out there sooner.” “I didn’t want it to happen this way. My family doesn’t even know that I’m gay and now they’re going to have those images of me bombarded at them.” “I’m sure they’ll be supportive. After all didn’t you say that your brothers were protective of you?” “When it comes to bullies and stuff, yeah, but 86
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this is different. My whole family is devout Pentecostal.” “How devout?” “I wasn’t even allowed to listen to rock music or read books like Harry Potter?” Jochen blinked a few times, shocked that somebody as snarky as Rebel managed to come from such a strict background. “Wow, I’m amazed they even named you Rebel.” “That was before, during my mom’s wild years.” Rebel made air quotes in the air. “She used to have this big thing for James Dean, so she named me after one of her favorite movies.” “Well, maybe she’ll understand. After all, wasn’t Sal Mineo in that? He was gay.” Rebel gave him a droll look. “I seriously doubt that will make a difference to her. I was kind of hoping to ease them into this.” “I don’t think there is any way you can just ease into this, babe.” Rebel ran a hand through his hair, making it stand on end. Normally Jochen would have thought it made him look even cuter, but Rebel was still way too pale for his liking. “Do you want to call her? Give her a warning.” “I guess I better. We need to tell Robby about this, too.” Jochen nodded in agreement. There was bound 87
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to be some bad publicity coming the man’s way due to their screw-up. The least they owed him was to hear about it from them. “I’ll go talk to him. You phone your mother,” Jochen suggested. “Are you sure? I’ve known Robby for much longer.” Yeah, Jochen was damn sure. It was already hard enough on Rebel, what with him having to face his family. He didn’t need the added stress of having to have that same conversation with his mentor, too. Jochen would help his lover by taking one of those loads on himself. “I’m positive.” They quickly got dressed and Jochen went to find Robby. As he left, he could hear Rebel phoning his mother. Jochen only hoped the conversation went better than the goalie anticipated. He knew that he would have to call his own mother soon, but she tended to sleep late, plus he wanted things cleared with Robby first. He found the coach in his office. His wife, Ashley, was with him. Robby sat at his desk, she stood behind him, bent over his shoulder as they both looked at a computer. Jochen’s stomach dropped because he had a pretty good idea that they weren’t looking at Angry Birds on that thing. He gave a soft knock on the doorframe. They glanced up at him, neither appearing too 88
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surprised to see him there. They didn’t look very angry either, which he took as a hopeful sign, as tiny as it may be. “Can we talk?” he asked. “Of course,” Ashley said, gesturing to a chair in front of the desk. Jochen sat down and took a deep breath. “I’m sure you already saw the pictures.” Robby stared at him a few moments. Jochen held his breath in anticipation. Since he didn’t know the man that well, he couldn’t tell what he may be thinking. Finally Robby gave a small nod, “Yeah, a parent emailed me the article.” Oh, boy. If the parents were already getting involved, then it couldn’t be good. “I’m sorry, I was the one who initiated it, not Rebel. So if you’re going to let somebody go, it should be me. He’s worked so long for you, I don’t want this to ruin your relationship.” “Neither do I,” Robby replied. Jochen allowed himself to feel a little bit happy that at least he’d been able to salvage Rebel’s job. “I just need an hour to pack and I’ll be out of here.” “Where in the hell do you think you’re going?” A heavy dash of confusion hit Jochen. “I just assumed that you wouldn’t want all the bad publicity hitting your school.” 89
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Robby let out a curse. “It’s not your fault. It’s that damn Net Wanker blog’s doing.” “I hate that asshat,” Ashley hissed angrily. “But aren’t the parents going to be mad if I stay?” Robby leaned forward and pinned Jochen with a determined stare. “You let me worry about that. I just want you and Rebel to keep doing what you have been and that’s being great instructors for my school.” Jochen let out a sigh of relief. “Thank you so much for being so understanding. I know this must have been a shock for you.” Ashley rolled her eyes. “Are you serious? We’ve known all along. All the staff have, in fact.” Jochen froze in shock. And here he and Rebel thought they’d been so discreet. “They have? How?” He only prayed it hadn’t been because their room had thin walls, or else he didn’t think he’d be able to look any of them in the eye again. Ashley gave a soft laugh. “With the way you two look at each other, it wasn’t too hard to figure out. Plus, you and Rebel have been inseparable since the beginning of summer.” “How is Rebel reacting to all this?” Robby asked. “Not too well. While he and I already made up our minds to come out, we were hoping to do it 90
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more gently than this. He’s on the phone with his mother right now.” “That won’t be good,” Ashley said. “I never did like that woman. She was always too hard on Rebel.” “I should get back to him,” Jochen replied, suddenly eager to comfort Rebel in case the call to his parents turned sour. At least he had some good news to share. Jochen got up and went back to the room. On the way, he passed a couple of the other instructors, all of them giving him words of encouragement and Jochen allowed himself to believe that maybe things would work out okay after all. Those hopes were dashed the moment he walked into their room. Rebel sat on his bed, his back to the wall. He had his knees tucked to his chest as he stared out the window. Even at that angle, Jochen could see the bleak despair in his lover’s normally dancing green eyes. While Rebel wasn’t outwardly crying, the sadness still carried over in the way his bottom lip trembled just the slightest bit. “Shit,” Jochen breathed, his heart breaking at the sight. He rushed over, sat down on the bed and pulled Rebel into his arms. Rebel went without a fight, sinking into Jochen’s chest. “What happened?” Jochen asked as he stroked 91
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Rebel’s hair. “I’ve been disowned.” “By your mother?” “No, by my entire family, even my brothers don’t want me anymore.” Jochen shook his head, shock momentarily making him speechless. He couldn’t imagine his parents, much less his sister, turning on him that way. He finally managed to ask, “Even the brother you’ve been living with?” Rebel nodded. “I was told not to even bother coming back to pack. That my things would be shipped to me. They don’t want me entering their house and tainting it with my sin.” “Those sons of bitches. They have no right to treat you that way.” Rebel gave a half-shrug. “I kind of expected it. Deep down I knew there would be no easing them into this. I was just deluding myself.” Jochen pulled back to gaze down at Rebel. “If you knew that, why did you suggest that we come out at all?” Rebel looked up, his eyes wet with unshed tears. “Because you mean that much to me.” Never had Jochen felt so humble than at that moment. To realize that Rebel would so willingly make such a huge sacrifice for him nearly overwhelmed Jochen. He swallowed hard as he gave Rebel a tight hug. At the same time, Jochen 92
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vowed that he’d do everything in his power to prove himself worthy of Rebel’s gesture. “What did Robby say?” Rebel asked. “That they knew about us all along and we aren’t to go anywhere. Our jobs are still secure here.” “He wasn’t mad?” “Well, yeah, but it was directed at the blog, not us.” Rebel snuggled in deeper. “Are you going to call your parents?” “Yeah, I should probably do that before we leave for the rink.” “Do you want me to leave the room to give you some privacy?” “No, I’m not ready to let go of you yet.” Jochen gave the top of Rebel’s head a kiss, then wiggled just a bit so he could fish his cell from his pants. Still holding Rebel, Jochen called his mother’s number. She picked up on the first ring, letting him know she’d been anticipating his call. “That damn asshat!” she declared upon answering. “So, I take it you heard the news?” Jochen ventured carefully. “If you can call what he puts on his blog news.” Jochen paused, not sure if some of that anger was directed at him. “Are you upset at me?” “Why would I be mad at you? Although, I can 93
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think of better places to get frisky than your car. Isn’t that a bit juvenile for somebody your age?” His breath hitched a bit as he wondered just how many curveballs were going to be thrown his way that morning. “It doesn’t matter to you that I was with another guy?” “No, why should it?” “You have no issue with me being gay?” “Oh, baby, we’ve known that since you were seven and plastered your bedroom with Brendan Shanahan posters.” “So what? Plenty of boys have his posters.” “Maybe, but not all of them cover them in heart stickers.” Jochen paused. Okay, maybe she had a point there. “How is Dad taking this?” “Frankly, I think he’s relieved it’s finally out in the open. He was getting sick of tiptoeing around the issue. He just wants you to be comfortable and happy with yourself.” “Well, crap.” “What? Were you expecting tears or something? If so, then just wait for next Thanksgiving. I’m sure Aldrich will find some way to dig up enough drama for all of us.” “I don’t know what I was expecting,” Jochen admitted. “Although I have to admit I really am happy with the way you’re taking this.” “Has Rebel talked to his parents yet?” 94
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Jochen glanced down at his lover. “Yeah, it didn’t go so well.” “Oh, that poor baby.” She sighed. “You tell him that he has us now.” A wave of gratitude went over Jochen as he realized just how lucky he was to have been born into such a crazy family. “I will.” “He’s really special to you, isn’t he?” “Yes, how could you tell?” “By the tone of your voice. A mother has a way of knowing these things. Whether or not you’re ready to admit it, that boy is the one for you. You two just have to be strong enough to stand up to this challenge.” As Jochen glanced back down at Rebel, he silently agreed with his mother. He just hoped that this mess wouldn’t drive Rebel away, just as Jochen realized how much he cared for him.
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Chapter Eight
T
he morning and early afternoon passed by in a dull blur for Jochen. He tried to lose himself in the drills and familiar routine, but he continued to worry about Rebel. To put it simply, his goalie had lost his spark. Rebel acted as if he was in a daze, speaking only when spoken to and not smiling at all. He didn’t even crack a laugh when one of the other instructors tripped and made a spectacular face plant at center ice. Usually a good display at public humiliation brought a grin to Rebel’s face, yet this time he didn’t even blink twice. By the time they got back to the house, Jochen felt frantic with worry. With each passing moment, Rebel seemed to be withdrawing deeper into himself and Jochen didn’t know how to snap him out of it. When they got inside, Rebel went straight to the room, mumbling something about taking a nap. Jochen was going to go check up on him when the 96
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doorbell rang. Since everybody else was busy with the campers, Jochen went to answer it. He opened the door, his mouth dropping in shock. “Sergei? What are you doing here?” A thin blond who stood a few inches shorter than Jochen, Sergei had been a friend for a few months. He also happened to be one of the few who knew that Jochen was gay…or rather he used to be one of the few. “Sorry it took me so long to get here,” Sergei said by way of greeting. “Yeah, it took us over three hours to drive to this joint,” another voice called. Jochen peered around Sergei to see who it was. His shock deepened when he saw another blond standing there. This one a bit taller and more muscular. “Trey, what in the hell are you doing here? Trey rolled his eyes. “It was either come here or get stuck babysitting your ugly ass cat. Trust me, as soon as I laid eyes on the hideous thing, it was an easy choice.” “Bangles isn’t ugly,” Jochen protested, still confused as to why they were standing on the doorstep. “Yeah, it is. Plus the thing stinks.” “She can’t help it.” “Why in the hell did you name it Bangles? You would think its looks would be insult enough 97
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without tagging it with that moniker.” “Because Walk Like an Egyptian was too long. I like that group, so sue me.” Trey rolled his eyes. “And yet everyone was shocked to hear that you’re gay.” Jochen didn’t know whether to be insulted or not, so he just stepped inside to let them in. “Sergei, if you’re here, then who has my cat?” “Kip is taking good care of him, don’t worry.” “So, why are you two here?” “We thought you and Rebel could use the moral support,” Sergei explained. “How is the little whippersnapper taking it?” Trey asked. “Not so well. His family cut him off.” Sergei winced. “Oh, that sucks. I know how that feels.” “And it’s all thanks to that stupid blog. That asshat,” Trey seethed. “That seems to be everybody’s opinion,” Jochen said. Trey was just adding a few other names when Rebel walked in. He had his cell in his hand. If he noticed that Sergei and Trey were there, he didn’t mention it. He just stood there, his face pinched with stress as he nibbled on his bottom lip. “What happened now?” Jochen demanded as he rushed to Rebel’s side. “The Cougars just called. They cut me from the 98
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team.” “What?” Trey yelled, his eyes wide with shock. “They said they no longer needed me as part of their roster. They didn’t even try to trade me or anything, they just gave me the boot.” “But you have one of the best save records in the league,” Sergei protested. “Why would they care about that? It’s not like they need any help with their game. It’s more fun to stay in the penalty box and send players to the hospital,” Trey cut in sarcastically. “Maybe it’s for the best. I don’t think Rebel would have felt very welcome there anymore anyway,” Sergei said with a visible shiver. Rebel nodded, his gaze locked onto the ground. He turned to go away, looking more dejected than ever, aiming for the door at a near run. Jochen knew then he had to do something before he lost Rebel forever. “Stop,” he commanded in a hard tone. Both Sergei and Trey sucked in a breath of surprise, but Jochen ignored them. Only Rebel’s reaction mattered. Rebel instantly came to a halt, but didn’t turn around. It was almost as if he were waiting for another order, some guidance in turmoil. Which was something Jochen was more than happy to offer. “Get back here,” he commanded. 99
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Rebel turned around and slowly made his way back to Jochen. When he got close enough, Jochen reached up and put two fingers under Rebel’s chin, forcing him to look up and meet eyes. “Everything is going to be okay,” Jochen said. “It is?” “Yes, you’re going to move in with me and Aldrich. While we may not live in the nicest of apartments, it’s better than the streets. Most importantly, we’ll be together. Then we’re going to find you a new team.” “What team is going to want me now?” “Plenty of them. You’re an awesome goalie and that’s the only thing the worthy teams are going to worry about. If any of the others have a problem with it, then fuck them.” Rebel stared up, his eyes devoid of all happiness. Then just as Jochen was about to give up, he saw it—the tiniest flicker of hope. It gave him the strength to push on. “You told me last night and this morning that I was worth the risk. That you cared for me more than you feared them. Is that still true?” Jochen challenged. “Of course it is.” Letting out a sigh of relief, he pulled Rebel into a tight embrace. “Then you can’t give up on me now. While things may not have gone down the way we’d hoped, in the end, we have the most 100
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important thing of all—each other.” When Rebel returned the embrace, Jochen’s heart soared. “You’re right. That is all that matters.” They held each other for a few moments, before Rebel asked, “Why are Trey and Sergei here?” “We’re here to offer moral support, you dork,” Trey called. Rebel laughed. “Well, when you put it that way, who am I to question? I can just feel the love pouring off you.” Trey flipped him off and Rebel laughed harder as he returned the gesture. As Jochen joined them, he allowed himself to finally hope that everything would work out okay, after all. Sergei and Trey ended up staying for the next couple of days, joining in to help out at the camp. A few parents pulled their kids out due to the scandal, but more called or wrote to offer their support. The kids all loved Jochen and Rebel, a sentiment most of the parents shared. One evening, Jochen was in the rec room with Trey and Sergei when Rebel burst in. At first Jochen tensed, sure it would be yet more bad news, but Rebel had a huge grin on his face and he almost bounced with excitement. “Guess who just called me!” he exclaimed. “If it’s my bookie, tell him I’m not here,” Trey cracked. 101
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Rebel rolled his eyes before saying, “It was the Grand Rapids Mustangs. They said they couldn’t believe that the Cougars let me go. Then they asked me if I would be interested in signing with them.” Jochen let out a whoop of excitement as he hugged Rebel. “That’s great news.” “It’s still the minor league, but at least I’m playing again. Plus, Grand Rapids is only an hour away from Lansing.” Rebel frowned. “I guess I’ll have to get my own place though, it’ll be too far for me to drive every day once the season starts.” “How about we get an apartment halfway between the two cities?” Jochen suggested, still holding Rebel. Rebel gave him a shy smile. “You’d be willing to do that for me?” “Of course I would. The only thing is Aldrich and Bangles will have to come, too.” “Thank God you’re taking that evil cat with you. Kip just called and told me that the thing pissed in my shoes,” Trey griped. “Maybe that will teach you not to always leave stuff behind at other people’s houses,” Sergei retorted. “Maybe Bangles should just learn better bladder control.” “Bangles only pees on people’s things when they piss her off, so you probably deserved it,” 102
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Jochen said before he turned back to Rebel. “So what do you say? Are we going to become permanent roomies?” Rebel grinned up at him. “I guess I can put up with one goofy cousin and an ugly cat, so long as I get to be with you.” Jochen dipped his head down and captured Rebel’s kiss in a soft kiss. Once they broke apart, Rebel asked, “Are you sure? We’ve only known each other a few weeks, so I know it may be too soon.” “I’m positive. Besides, my mom assured me that you were the one and she’s never steered me wrong yet.” As they shared another kiss, Jochen made a mental note to send his mother a bouquet of flowers. He hadn’t been kidding when he’d said she was right. Rebel was very special to Jochen and he never planned on letting him go.
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About the Author
Stephani Hecht is a happily married mother of two. Born and raised in Michigan, she loves all things about the state, from the frigid winters to the Detroit Red Wings hockey team. Go Wings! You can usually find her snuggled up to her laptop, creating her next book or gorging on caffeine at her favorite coffee shop.