LESSONS TO LOVE by Erin Gordon
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LESSONS TO LOVE by Erin Gordon
No portion of this book may be reproduced, scanned, or distributed in any print or electronic form without permission. This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and coincidental. Any resemblance between persons living and dead, establishments, events, or location is entirely coincidental.
Lessons to Love Shadowrose Publishing /by arrangement with the author Paperback First Edition Printing/ March 2006
Please help keep authors writing. Do not copy or reproduce this book. If you purchase this book without a cover, please be aware that the author was not compensated for its sale.
Lessons to Love Copyright © 2007 by Shadowrose Publishing ISBN 978-1-890785-02-4 Shadowrose Publishing, Rom-On-Line Publishing All Rights Reserved Printed in the United States of America 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
“Come here Cassandra” he said softly. Cassie was angry with herself for being nervous. He was just a man, and it wasn’t as if she was a virgin, for heavens’ sake. She was twenty-nine years old—and a cop to boot! If it came down to it, she could take him down. That thought comforted her momentarily, and she tilted her chin up. “I’m fine right here.”
This book is dedicated to strong women that dare to explore their own hidden desires… Domination does not mean domineering Submissive does not mean doormat
Erin Gordon
Prologue
Police officer Cassandra O’Rourke sighed as she listened to the call on the radio. The Internet Killer had struck again. She knew before she even arrived at the scene that it would be another woman, and that she’d have been beaten to death It infuriated her when the calls came though. Parents warned their kids to be careful when they got on the Internet. Everyone knew that it was dangerous as hell to give out personal information, and to meet people via a chat room. Why would an intelligent woman meet with a total stranger without taking some kind of precaution? Not all of the victims had died, but none had been able to identify the perpetrator. Cassie was tired of dreaming of the sick bastard, and had sworn that she’d get him off the streets no matter what it took. In almost eight years on the police force, she’d seen things that would make most people have nightmares, but nothing could compare to the abject cruelty of this man. He’d killed seven women already; and at least a dozen had been beaten very badly. All they knew for sure is that he found them in chat rooms. Obviously he’d used a different user name, and so far they had not been able to trace him. Most of the women had been seduced with words quickly, too. Some had agreed to meet him almost immediately. If here was one thing Cassie knew for sure, it was that trusting strangers on the Internet wasn’t a good idea! She’d find the bastard if it was the last thing she ever did.
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Chapter One Cassie sighed as she browsed the web. The number of porn websites was growing exponentially, it seemed. In her line of work, porn was the last thing she wanted to read. It was not her cup of tea. She went back to Google and tried again. Instead of BDSM she typed in D/s and she waited for the page to load. There were dozens of links. One caught her eye. D/s (Domination and submission) Chat Room for Beginners: D/s does not mean abuse Her hand paused as she prepared to click the mouse. This was a huge step for her. Yet, she was certainly intrigued by the idea of actually talking to people that were interested in D/s. She’d done some research on D/s for work; especially after this case hit her desk. Also, as a vice cop, she had to know the lingo, if nothing else. The more she read, the more fascinated she became with the concept. Still, she reminded herself, this was for work—not any personal interest. She ignored the nagging little voice in her mind that said she was lying to herself. Somewhere in the city, there was a man that was luring women via various Internet chat rooms, and beating them senseless. It was her job to find him- more than her job. She’d made it her mission. He’d killed and maimed too many women. She’d find him and bust his ass. If she had her way, all the victims would have a shot at him—together; a little tit for tat. But, unfortunately, justice didn’t work that way. And the law she’d sworn to uphold didn’t allow for it. But right now, she wasn’t at work. She was sitting at home in the comfort of her own living room. A little more research would likely be a good thing, she told herself. She didn’t understand, even after her reading, what D/s was really all about, though. It just seemed to be guys that were into power trips, and women that wanted to be bossed around, and not be in control of their own lives. Despite that, it was kind of intriguing. She wondered what kind of women would allow themselves to be ruled by another person. She also wondered what it would be like to give control to another person. She just couldn’t imagine it. In her job, she always had to be in control. There was no room for submission, certainly. However, her personal life was an 2
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entirely different story. There was something missing, and, while she didn’t know that this was it, something about it intrigued the hell out of her. “What the hell,” Cassie said aloud. She clicked the mouse and found a website with a link to a downloadable chat program that would let her enter live chat rooms. The site also had information about the room. There is a huge difference between BDSM and D/s D/s does not mean abuse or that one is a sadist or masochist. She thought about that for a minute. She had always assumed they were basically the same thing. She couldn’t count the number of times on the job men had wanted to do things that would make most women blush; not to mention that there had been several occasions when they had wanted her to let them beat her up a little. Of course, they’d offered to pay extra. To her mind, no woman, even a hooker looking for a few extra bucks, should allow herself to be beaten. Just the thought was enough to make her angry and a little ill. Men, she’d decided a long time ago, could be unadulterated asses. A man that had to get his jollies by causing pain was less than a man to her. No, the aspects of BDSM did nothing for her at all. But the information she’d read about D/s intrigued the part of her that was hidden from the people in her life. She’d grown up being abused, yet even with that, something about spanking had always interested her. She’d fantasized about some loving person spanking her when she’d endangered herself; something along those lines. She was intrigued by the subtitle of the D/s site. Well, she thought, it couldn’t hurt to go to the chat and see what was going on. She didn’t have to talk to anyone, she assured herself. She downloaded the required program and tapped her fingers on the desk as the program installed. For all the time she’d spent on the Internet, she’d never gone into a chat room. Hell, she should have been in the chat rooms ages ago, it was likely the best way to ferret the bastard out. When the program was installed, she typed in the command to enter the chat room, as per the directions on the website. The program had asked for a nickname, and she used Brandy. It was one of her street names. The right side of her screen showed about fifty other names, some of the nicknames were using capital letters and some in lower case. Did that even mean anything? She leaned back in her chair and followed the dialogue, absently twirling a long curl around her finger as she watched. One of the 3
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men chatting caught her interest. Sir Lancelot. “Gimme a break,” she muttered aloud. “Original.” Still, she was intrigued. She followed his conversation. Sir Lancelot: You will call me Sir, sherry. sherry: Of course, Sir. I apologize. Her fingers flew on the keys before she could even stop herself. Brandy: Why should she call you Sir? Are you her father? Brandon sat at his desk and grinned at the obvious challenge set before him. He noted that she had her name capped, not lowercase. Was she a Domme? Or; as he thought more likely, was she even aware that there was significance to how her name was listed. A Dom used capital letters for their nicknames, and the submissive used lower case. This was a room for beginners that he’d started several years before. He spent quite a bit of time in the room, making sure it was kept safe for all who entered. But he was in a mood to play, and this Brandy had caught his eye. Sir Lancelot: Because she is a submissive, and does as she is told. Brandon knew before he’d even lifted his fingers that his comment was sure to raise Brandy’s hackles. He tried to envision her, and smiled to himself. Redhead; definitely a redhead. It was strange, but he was almost certain he was right. Cassie narrowed her eyes and glared at the screen. What a jerk. She started to close the laptop, but changed her mind. She decided to vent a little steam. She’d worked almost all night the night before, so it was early in the morning. She was too wound up to sleep, and had gotten on the computer instead. Hell, he was probably a pervert without a life off of the Internet. Most men that she knew were either still sleeping or at work, not hanging out in a chat room. She wasn’t at all sure that this guy wasn’t the one she’d been searching for. Brandy: Does everyone do what you tell him or her to do? Sir Lancelot: No, only those that don’t want a sore bottom. Brandon waited to see what the lady would type next. He enjoyed D/s. He enjoyed being a Dom. This was his chat room, and as such, his responsibility, in part, was to instruct new visitors to the chat. He knew he’d never seen this nickname before. But something about her… he couldn’t put his finger on it. He might be a Dom, but he enjoyed fire in a woman—submissive or not. Her next line took the smile off his face. Brandy: So, you’re into beating on women, huh? 4
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One of the nice perks to owning the chat room was that he could use the kick feature. He did so quickly, and kicked Brandy out of the room. He quickly set the control so she couldn’t reenter until he’d spoken with her further. He didn’t want to disrupt the entire chat, but he wasn’t going to send Brandy off without a lesson, either. He clicked the message feature and typed quickly. Sir Lancelot: Why did you come into a D/s chat room? He wondered if she would respond. He knew she was reading, though. Call it gut instinct. Cassie considered once more just closing the program. Why had he messaged her? She was fuming that she’d been kicked out of the room in the first place. It seemed like a legitimate question to her. She had an intense dislike for men that abused women. She’d seen way too much of it in her career—and her personal life. Her father had taken great pleasure in getting drunk, then coming home and beating the hell out of her mother, or her. Even worse, her mother had made excuses for him. He’d rarely touched her brother. Add a really bad relationship to that, and she’d known she’d never allow herself to be abused by any man ever again. A part of her knew that she’d become a cop because of it. But, there was a little thrill of excitement, too, at the mention of a sore bottom. She simply had to reply, against her better judgment. Brandy: I was curious. But, the website specifically said that D/s wasn’t about abuse. Why did you kick me out of the room? Your website said this chat was for beginners with questions. Brandon took a moment to think out his response. The website, if she’d read it, also clearly explained that a submissive entered the room using lower-case letters. How much of the website had she really read? He decided to educate her calmly and rationally. Not everyone understood D/s, and he knew it was often confused with BDSM. They were different in his mind. Sir Lancelot: I kicked you out because you were disrupting the room. Did you read the website before you entered the chat room? And, what makes you think I mentioned abuse, Brandy? Cassie stared at the screen. This had been a mistake. Willing abuse was no different from unwilling abuse. It was still abuse. She almost felt sorrier for the women that allowed themselves to be abused. But something about the tone of his message had just set off a spark in her. Or maybe it was the nickname he’d chosen for himself. Hell would freeze over before she called him Sir anything. 5
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Brandy: Never mind. Sir Lancelot: Do you know anything about D/s, Brandy? Initially intrigued or not, she knew enough to know it wasn’t for her! Brandy: Enough. Look, apparently it was a mistake. I wasn’t trying to disrupt your silly room, either. It was rude to kick me out, though. Brandon smiled. Oh, it was fun to talk with a novice. He knew that there had to be a spark of interest, or she’d have never come into the chat room. Usually, though, novice subs, or even the curious, just came in and read what was going on; they lurked. Not so this lady. She’d jumped right in, with an attitude to boot. Sir Lancelot: Then you should know that spanking isn’t considered abuse in this circle. Brandon had absolutely no patience for anyone- man or woman- that condoned abuse. He’d never abused a woman in his life, nor would he. Any so-called Dom that came into his chat room that was abusive to a submissive was quickly kicked and banned from his chat. He liked his chat room to be a safe haven for everyone. Cassie was intrigued again despite herself. She wanted to hear more, it was probably a bad idea. Still, if nothing else, she might garner information that would help her find this bastard before he killed again. Brandy: Where do you live? Brandon grinned. He knew by her internet provider information that she was local. She obviously didn’t realize it. An ISP was listed right after the nickname when anyone entered the chat room. Even if that was missed, there was a whois feature. It was a little harder with ISP’s such as AOL or the larger ones, but not with small-town local ISP’s. Sir Lancelot: We have the same internet provider. Cassie’s eyes widened. All her instincts went on full alert. How could he have known that? Brandy: How did you know that? Sir Lancelot: Your ISP showed with your nickname when you entered the chat room. But it’s never wise to give out too much personal information too quickly on the Internet, young lady. Still, if you’d like to meet, I’m game. As long as you follow the safety rules that are outlined on my website. “Like that would ever happen,” Cassie muttered. The young lady irritated her, too. She hadn’t read any of the links on the 6
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website, just the first page, but she had a pretty good idea what the safety rules would be. Even she knew better than to give out her name or address to anyone on the Internet. She started typing again. Brandy: I don’t think so, stud. I’m not stupid. Brandon grinned again. No, she wasn’t stupid. Damn, but he wanted to meet her. He couldn’t even understand the attraction; not really. Yet, he’d have been concerned if she’d agreed to meet him. In this day and age, the Internet could be a very dangerous place. It would be amazingly easy for him to find her, though. She, of course, had no idea that he was a cop. He could track her with a couple of phone calls. Sir Lancelot: I’ll give you my number. Use the caller ID block on your phone and call me. Of course, if you’d read the chat room website, you’d have read about the section on safety. Cassie knew it was an order, not a request. Being scolded like she was a child gave her a strange feeling in the pit of her stomach, too. She should tell him to go straight to hell. Her fingers seemed to have a mind of their own, though. Besides, she told herself, this could be the guy she’d been looking for. He was sure quick to want to meet her. She forgot that she’d been the one to ask him where he lived, not the other way around. Brandy: All right. Brandon typed in his number and hit enter. He wanted to hear her voice. Sir Lancelot: And don’t forget to block your phone number, young lady. Cassie closed the window and looked down at the number he’d given her, contemplating. Same area code, so he did have to be local. She had no idea how large an area her ISP had. Not just the city of Parisburg, Virginia, surely. But the first three digits of the number meant he was close. Cassie’s cell phone automatically blocked her own caller ID. She picked up her cell and dialed the number he’d provided. It was probably a mistake, but she was curious about him. It couldn’t hurt to talk to him a little more. It was still possible that he was her perp. She tugged at the curl hanging off her shoulder absently as she listened for the connection. The phone was picked up on the first ring. Somehow, she wasn’t really expecting the deep voice that answered the phone. Her heart raced just a bit. She liked deep 7
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voices. “Hi. It’s Cass- er- Brandy.” He was probably about five nothing and six hundred pounds, she thought with an evil grin. Brandon grinned. Cassandra? Cassie? Cassidy? Which was it? “Hello Brandy.” He signed off the computer; propped long jean-clad legs on his desk, and leaned back in his chair. “Do you call complete strangers you meet on the Internet often, young lady?” he asked. Deliberately, he made his voice stern; what most subs called Dom Mode. Cassie flushed; glad he couldn’t see her face. “Of course not,” she muttered defensively. “Do you give your number to complete strangers often?” she countered. Damn, but he liked her spunk. Her voice was smoky and just a little breathless. “Touché,” he said mildly. “Still, it’s not a wise practice.” “Yeah.” Hell, he was right. “But, I’m going to assume that if you gave me your number, reminded me to block my number, and pointed out the foolishness of my calling you, that you’re likely not dangerous.” Of course, she had thought of none of those things when she’d agreed to call. Good thing she thought quickly on her toes. “Oh, I wouldn’t go that far. Ask Sherry. She’d likely say otherwise,” he teased. “Is she your submissive?” Cassie asked curiously. “Won’t she be upset that we’re talking?” Brandon laughed. “She’s a friend. We’ve known each other for years. She isn’t the jealous type, though. She’s due a spanking that she’s been trying to talk her way out of, but, she’s not my subbie.” “But you’ll spank her anyway?” Cassie asked, incredulously. What kind of guy had she called? “Doesn’t she have the right to say no? I’m sure that I’ve read that D/s and BDSM were all about consent.” Brandon bit back a chuckle. “Certainly she does. But she won’t. She knows she deserves it.” He was having fun. The lady had no idea that the only relationship he had with Sherry was an Internet one. She was happily married with two kids at last count. He was an online friend to both her and her husband. In fact, they’d met on the Internet. They rarely met in person, although it had happened a few times. They weren’t local, but did live in the state. “Why?” 8
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“I’m afraid she was disrespectful once too often. Every few weeks she needs a reminder to show proper respect,” he explained honestly. Of course, Sherry was what was known in the circle as a brat. Bratting was a game that many subs played on the Internet. It was a way to guarantee a scene with a Dom. Part of the fun for the brat was trying to talk their way out of trouble once they’d gotten into it. Hell, there were even little songs that a subbie would play when she was in trouble. “So, let me see if I understand,” Cassie began, her tone heavy with derision, “she didn’t call you Sir or something, so you’re going to beat her?” Her first thought had apparently been right. He was just a jerk! He obviously was used to talking to women with no backbone. Brandon decided to explain before the firebrand on the other end of the line hung up on him. “It’s a game we play. I wouldn’t ever hurt her, and she knows it. There are certain expectations between a Dom and a sub. Respect is mutual, by the way. Sherry has been trying to get a spanking for weeks now. Be a good girl, and you can watch.” He was probably being mean to tease her, but what the hell. Sometimes…it was just fun. Oh, she’d like to watch all right! If he hurt the woman, she’d slap cuffs on him so fast his head would spin! “So, you like having a voyeur, huh? Maybe that could be arranged. When and where?” Her heart started racing just a little faster. Maybe this was him, and she’d lucked out. Brandon frowned, his fingers tightened on the phone receiver. Damn, didn’t she know how dangerous that could be? Or was she messing with him? “Sometimes it does a sub good to see what she might be earning herself,” he said darkly. The little fool had no concept of her own safety. “Perhaps you’ll find out sooner rather than later.” She chuckled without humor. “I don’t think so, stud. No one is going to beat on me, thanks.” “What does Cass stand for? Cassandra? Cassie? Cassidy?” Cassie sighed. So, he’d picked that up. “Cassie. Short for Cassandra. And you are…?” “Brandon.” “Well, Brandon. I’m not interested in any lessons you might think I need,” she said firmly. “What about lessons that you think you might need?” he asked.
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“What makes you believe I think I need any lessons?” she countered. She twirled her hair around a finger absently. She propped her feet up on her desk and leaned back. “Something brought you to my chat room, Cassandra. What was it?” Brandon asked her again. “Curiosity,” she answered honestly. That was true as far as it went. She certainly couldn’t tell him she was a cop looking for a sadistic bastard that preyed on lonely women and beat them to death or near death. “Then, it stands to reason, that you should be curious as to what goes on in a D/s relationship. What better way to find out than to try it,” he reasoned. And the first thing he’d teach her was the safety rules! She almost groaned. Why was it that somehow that idea actually sent a thrill of anticipation through her? Ok, so she was attracted to his voice, she told herself. “Try what?” Her tone was breathless, though she didn’t realize it. “A lesson. Start with calling me Sir,” he said calmly. “And why would I want to do that?” “Because you were told to,” he said simply. He’d already made up his mind that if Cassandra was going to learn about D/s, she was going to do that learning from him. It was, in part, a game with him, at least on the Internet. But it was also the real life relationship he was looking for. He’d always known that he had a dominant personality. It was his nature. He’d often thought that he’d been born about a hundred years too late. But he also wanted a woman that wasn’t afraid to be his equal. “Don’t hold your breath,” she muttered. “Don’t hold your breath, Sir”, he said too softly. What the hell, she thought. “Sir,” she said obediently. That tone was as hard on her pulse as the stern one had been. There was something slightly dangerous in it. “I’m impressed. Now that we’ve got the formalities out of the way; you may call me Brandon.” “You’re very annoying, did anyone ever tell you that?” she asked, exasperated. “Not usually, no. I’m actually a very nice guy; quite easy to get along with, too.” “Hang out with a lot of women that say ‘Sir’, huh?” He chuckled. “Maybe.” He allowed. “So, tell me about yourself. What do you do for a living?” 10
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Of course, she couldn’t tell him she was a cop. “I work for the city.” “Doing?” he prompted. He couldn’t picture her at the city library. Not with that voice of hers. God, she had a great voice. The only word to describe it was sultry. “This and that. What do you do?” she asked curiously. She was just sure he was the CEO or something. Something about him just bespoke authority. Of course, he could also be a little man that made himself feel like someone important by giving himself the title Dom. He’d give her time to trust him before he probed deeper. “I’m a writer.” At least that was one of his interests. Eventually, he’d tell him his other job, but not right now. Cassie’s brow furrowed as she tried to remember an author with the first name of Brandon. “Sci-fi? Brandon Williamson?” He grinned. “Yup.” “Well, I’ll be damned. I’ve read some of your work. I loved the last one,” she admitted. And she’d also looked at his author photo on the back of the book. He was a hunk, and then some. Certainly not a six hundred pound anything. Too bad he had a sadistic streak, she thought with a sigh. She wondered if he still may be her guy. His name was well-known enough that perhaps a gullible woman would think he was safe. “Thank you,” he said formally. “By the way, ladies shouldn’t swear.” “Is that so?” she retorted. She’d damn well swear if she felt like it! “Are you so easily offended?” “Not at all,” he assured her. “I just consider it a spankable offense.” Despite herself, Cassie felt that lurch that could have either been anticipation or fear or a combination of both. “Oh. So, what’s a ‘damn’ worth?” “Hmm.” He paused for effect. “For a first offense, probably only a warning. So, consider that your warning. Now, a really bad swear word is more than likely going to earn a little corner time as well as handwritten lines of ‘Ladies should not swear’, along with a spanking.” “Lines? An adult woman would actually write lines?” She just couldn’t believe it. She could almost get the game, with spanking for cussing. But writing lines? “You’ve got to be kidding!” He made his voice all soft again. “Do I sound like I’m kidding, Cassandra?” The rub of it was he wasn’t. More than one of his 11
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previous subs had had her bottom warmed for swearing. He just didn’t like it when women swore with no good reason. Subs that knew him would swear so he’d do a scene with them. “I’ll try to fucking keep that in mind,” she replied. When hell freezes over, she added silently. “I’m not sure I like that tone, young lady. I’m definitely sure I don’t like the language. Would you like a sample?” He was wracking his brain to find a way to meet her. He suddenly had to meet her, the sooner the better. He really didn’t like it when a lady swore, but damn, he wanted to meet this feisty lady badly. She was deliberately baiting him, and though he could appreciate it, he knew that with this lady, he’d have to set the boundaries early. Something told him she’d constantly push the envelope. He grinned. Hell, he couldn’t wait. Sometimes, caution was called for, she decided. “No, Sir.” A part of her did want that sample, though! What was wrong with her? “I think perhaps you do, though. Don’t you, Cassie?” he asked softly. “You want me to come over, lay you over my lap and give you a spanking, don’t you?” “I don’t want hurt,” she argued. “I’m not into pain.” “I would never hurt you, Cassandra. A spanking isn’t about hurting. It’s about learning, among other things. You would learn about yourself and about me as well.” Suddenly, she had to know exactly what it was about. All of it. She wanted to know everything, and she knew that she wanted him to be the one to teach her. She still wasn’t sure if this D/s thing was something she wanted to pursue, but the more she talked to Brandon Williamson, the more she wanted to try it. “What if I changed my mind?” If she was going to even consider meeting him, she wanted to be sure there was an out. He was too wellknown to be a real danger to her, she figured. And, he didn’t know that she certainly wasn’t defenseless. She was going to meet him. He was sure of it. “There is always a safeword, Cassie. Any and all play stops when a safeword is used. But it’s not to be used lightly, either. Once I begin a scene with you, I’m going to want to finish it. You will want me to, as well.” “So, if I said stop you’d stop?” she asked hesitantly. He chuckled. “Stop is a very bad safeword. I promise, you’ll say stop before you really mean it.” 12
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Frustrated now, she snapped “So, what the hell is a good safeword, then?” “That does it,” he said in that soft tone again. He figured she’d used the hell intentionally. “You’ve earned your first lesson. We’ll discuss your safeword when I get there. What’s your address?” Her heart was racing. Had she sworn intentionally? Probably. “I’m not sure about this,” she said, her voice very soft. “You can trust me, Cassandra. Tell me a word that you can easily remember.” “Freeze,” she said without thinking. “That will do just fine. It’s your safeword. Now, what’s your address?” Was she really going to do this? Perhaps it would be safer to meet him somewhere pubic, first. Perhaps hell. It would obviously be safer; still…she gave him the address. He knew exactly where it was. “I’ll be there in twenty minutes. Use that time to write twenty-five times ladies do not swear,” he said, and then promptly hung up. Cassie was cursing a blue streak as she hung up the phone. Lines, she thought grimly. What the hell, it wouldn’t take long. God, she hadn’t written lines since she’d been in third grade. The imp in her suddenly had an idea, though. She opened her word processor and typed the line in, then copied and pasted it twentyfive times. She printed the lines out and sat them on the desk, then walked into her room. She stood in front of the mirror, considering if she should change clothes or not. She was wearing her most comfortable Levi’s and a short-sleeved green sweater that she knew accented her hazel eyes. To hell with it, she wouldn’t change. But she did run her comb through her long, wavy hair and checked her makeup. Before she knew it, there was a soft knock on her front door. She hurriedly went through the living room to the front door. For half a heartbeat, she considered not answering it. She could be letting in the very man the Department was trying to find, and without backup. But, she decided, her gun was put away, and he had no idea she had one. She could defend herself in hand-tohand, too, if needed. She took a deep breath, and after checking the peephole, opened the door. Brandon stood and just looked at her for a long moment. Lord, but she was beautiful. She was about five foot two and weighed 13
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no more than one-ten. Her hair was long and wavy, almost curly. And red, as he’d known somehow it would be. Her eyes were deep green, almost exotic, with their upward tilt. “You’re beautiful,” he said huskily. Cassie smiled. Not a bad opening line, even if it wasn’t true. She knew that some guys considered her attractive, but she wasn’t beautiful. Mostly, it was her breasts that first attracted men. She was a small woman, and her breasts could not be considered small in anyone’s use of the word. But, still, she liked hearing the compliment. “You’re not so bad yourself.” His picture hadn’t done him justice. He was definitely a hunk. At least six-three and every bit of it hard, gorgeous male. He wore faded jeans, and a blue buttonup shirt. “Come on in,” she said, stepping back from the door to let him enter. His hair was dark, almost black, and worn too long to be quite fashionable. And his eyes. They were a deep, penetrating blue. There was just a hint of a cleft in his chin. A roll in the hay wasn’t out of the question, she decided on the spot. It had been a while. She held the door open, waiting for him to enter, and gestured toward the couch. She stood aside as he walked past her. Lord, he was easy on the eyes. It had obviously been too long since she’d had sex if she was considering inviting a total stranger to her bed, but she was considering exactly that. “Would you like something to drink?” she asked. “I’ve got wine, beer, and soda.” “I wouldn’t say no to a Coke,” he said with a smile. Alcohol and D/s didn’t mix in his opinion. And he certainly didn’t drink before noon. “Then we can talk.” She nodded and headed for the kitchen, slightly surprised when he followed her. “You can wait in the living room.” He smiled. She was nervous. He’d have been surprised if she wasn’t. “Did you write those lines?” She pointed to the desk in the corner of the room. “Over there,” she replied, her tone petulant. He walked over to the desk and chuckled out loud when he saw the page. He hadn’t even considered that she’d simply type them He’d half expected her to tell him that she hadn’t done it. He’d only told her to so she wouldn’t get herself worked up while he was driving over. He folded them and put them in his pocket, then walked over to the couch. 14
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Her apartment was lovely. The living room was done in various shades of blue. It was a comfortable room, he decided. She had several plants, and bookshelves. He appreciated anyone who read books—especially his. He looked at the shelf, and indeed, there were several of his books on an upper shelf. Yet, he was sure that he’d never come across her at any of his book signings. Too bad, he thought, he’d have met her a lot sooner. She walked back into the room carrying two glasses of soda. She sat across the room, though, on the recliner next to the desk. She’d sat his soda down across the room on the table in front of the couch. He walked over and sat down. He took a long sip of the cold soda, and sat the glass down on one of the coasters. “So, tell me, what made you look up a D/s chat room?” She shrugged. “I told you, I was just curious.” “About?” he prompted. This was the third time he’d asked this question, and now that he was here in person, he wanted a full answer. “I suppose I was trying to figure out why a grown woman would let a man dominate her.” “Actually, it is strong women that are usually submissive. They are sure of themselves and sure of what they want. Many have demanding careers. It’s a way for them to let themselves go. Most subs find it liberating.” “And the Dominant one? What about him?” she asked. He grinned. “We like to be in charge.” She groaned. “I already figured that much out.” “It’s mostly about trust. All D/s requires the utmost of trust,” he explained. As he watched her, her body language showed him that she was nervous. She was absently tugging on a curl as she watched him, and he doubted she even realized it. “Come here, Cassandra,” he said softly. Cassie was angry with herself for being nervous. He was just a man, and it wasn’t as if she was a virgin, for heavens’ sake. She was a twenty-nine year old woman—and a cop to boot! If it came down to it, she could easily take him down. That thought comforted her momentarily, and she tilted her chin up. “I’m fine right here.” Brandon leaned back on the couch and crossed his arms across his chest. “Tell me why you let me come over, Cassandra.” “I liked your voice, and your books, and I had questions.” 15
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“Are you sure there was nothing more?” he asked knowingly. “Your questions could have easily been answered online, or on the phone for that matter.” He had her there, damn it. “Well, it wasn’t so you could spank me or whatever, if that’s what you’re thinking.” She stood and paced—safely across the room, out of his reach. Brandon stood and walked over to her. He gently pulled her to a stop and made her face him. “Nothing will happen here that you don’t want to happen, Cassie. I promise you that.” When he felt her relax, he continued. “But I want you to tell me what you do want.” She raised her eyes and looked deeply into his. She didn’t see anything but kindness there—and excitement. Nothing, though, that really scared her. Her heart fluttered in her chest, and she tried to keep her voice steady. Ok, so she wanted him to take her to bed. And just maybe, to try the spanking thing. “I’m not really sure.” He moved his hands from her arms, and gently touched her cheek. God, her skin was soft. During his thirty-four years, he’d met many women that he’d wanted. Something about her was different, though. He enjoyed D/s. For him, is was more than just fun and games. He found himself wanting more from her than just a fun afternoon. Today was just the beginning for him. He sensed that there were many layers to this woman, and he was determined to be the one to discover them all. She was all nerves one minute, then prickly, then downright belligerent. She’d be fun as hell. Brandon took her hand and led her to the chair she’d vacated, but instead of urging her to sit, he sat himself and pulled her down onto his lap. She was such a tiny little thing, he mused. “Let’s just talk a bit, alright?” She nodded. Her body was tense. She had to admit though, that she liked sitting on his lap. It made her feel special—and somehow, like a little girl. She wasn’t sure that she entirely liked that feeling. “Good girl. Now, tell me a little about yourself.” “What do you want to know?” She looked directly into his eyes. “I want to know why you invited a complete stranger into your home,” he said simply. Before he could get anywhere with her, she would have to be honest—both with him and, more importantly, with herself. He’d met a lot of people, both male and female, that found the D/s chat room out of sheer curiosity, but 16
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something told him that with her, there was more to it. He wanted—no needed—to know. “I guess because something about you intrigued me,” she admitted. He grinned now. “Something about me, huh? You mean my charming personality?” Cassie smiled. “I don’t know that I’d call it charming. Actually, I thought you were a jerk!” Cassie felt his chest rumble when he started to laugh. Again, her pulse raced. “Jerk, huh?“ He shrugged. He’d been called worse. “I suppose I might come across that way to someone that doesn’t know me, or the scene. That brings me back to the original question. Why am I here? You know why I wanted to come. Me, I want to give you a spanking, and you knew that when you let me come over,” he added. He was sure she’d known it, too. Cassie wanted to get up and pace again. When she looked into his eyes, it was as if he were seeing into her soul. He saw entirely too much. “Because I wanted to meet you.” That was a start, he thought. “And, you know that I have every intention of turning you across my lap and giving you a spanking? Assuming, of course, that you want me to.” Her heart lurched, then raced again. It was partly wariness, but something else, too. “Yes,” she whispered. “And you want me to.” It wasn’t a question. That was a tricky question. She knew that part of her did. Somehow, it excited and frightened her at the same time. “I don’t know if I do or not.” He tilted her face up, cupping her chin, so she had to look him in the eye. “There is one thing that I will always expect, Cassie. Honesty.” He paused a moment. “You do want spanked.” “I was being honest. I don’t really know. Part of me does, I think.” “I want you, Cassie. I want quite a bit from you.“ “What do you want from me?” “Everything.” It was no more than the truth. He watched her carefully. There were a multitude of expressions in her face and eyes. Desire. Fear. Uncertainty. Lord, her eyes couldn’t hide a thing. Did she know how easy she was to read? Everything. That one word scared her more than she would like to have admitted. She had always managed to keep a part of herself hidden away, safe. In all her prior relationships, there had 17
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been a part of her that no one could touch. It was safer that way. “You want too much,” she whispered. He smiled gently. “Not more than I’m willing to give of myself, Cassie.”
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Chapter Two Cassie didn’t know what to do or what to say. Nervously, she stood and started to pace again. “You don’t even know me.” Brandon knew he was moving too quick. She wasn’t ready to be pushed, but damn if he could help himself. This was the woman he wanted. He felt it. She was the one that would complete him. “We will get to know each other, Cassandra. We’ll go slowly.” But you will be mine, he added silently. Exploring sexuality was something that he’d had a lot of experience with. He knew how help a woman explore her deepest desires, and even how to rid herself of many of her fears and inhibitions. That was part of D/s, but certainly not something that she was ready to hear right now. “Ok, let’s assume that I want to explore this D/s thing. What happens?” Now Brandon grinned. “Remember all those swear words?” Cassie shrugged. “Answer me,” he said firmly. “And answer properly.” “Yes, I remember.” “Sir,” he said. It was a small point, but he needed her to say it. It was an important first step. “Sir,” she repeated, not even trying to hide the sarcastic tone. “Cassandra, sarcasm won’t be tolerated any more than swearing will,” he cautioned. “That will be your only warning.” Cassie nodded. “I don’t know the rules, obviously.” That was true as far as it went, but she was testing him. Some little devil inside her was enjoying doing so. Brandon understood better than she would ever know. It was in a sub’s nature. And even if she didn’t know it, he was sure that she was a sub. Or easily could be. “You’ll learn them, Cassie. “ He paused. The silence was thick. “What?” she said. “Come here.” Again, it wasn’t a request, and he knew she realized it. He could read the knowledge on her face. See it in the hazel eyes that darkened. She knew what was about to happen. But, the next move was hers, not his. He wanted her in his bed, in his heart, and everywhere in between. He was usually a very patient man, but not this time. He wanted to move forward quickly, before she took too much time to second-guess herself. 19
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She was nervous, and justifiably so. This was all new to her, and he had to move slowly, he knew that. There would be time later to get into the nuances of D/s with her. For now, she needed her first lesson as much as he wanted to give it to her. She needed to realize that she didn’t need to fear him. Cassie walked over to the chair and stood before him, waiting. Her heart was racing, and suddenly she felt like a little girl again. A little girl that was waiting for punishment for some misdeed. What surprised her was that part of her actually liked the feeling. Brandon stood up and took her hand, then walked back over to the couch. He sat down and tugged her onto his lap again. He ran his hand through her hair, gentling her. “Tell me why you’re earned a spanking,” he said, his voice soft and stern at the same time.. She looked up at him. Her heart was racing, but it was from more than fear of the unknown. It was excitement, too. “I swore when you told me not to.” Brandon nodded. “Yes, you did. And what did I tell you about that?” “That I deserved a spanking,” she whispered after a long pause. She felt her face heat. This was embarrassing. He nodded again. “Exactly. So, that is what I am going to do now.” “Uh—that is…” “Have you changed your mind, Cassie?” He touched her cheek gently. Lord, he hoped she said no. This first step was an important one. She had to trust him, and perhaps he’d moved too quickly to gain that required trust. “H—how many?” Ah, so that was where her mind was. “Oh, I think it will probably be a short lesson. An introduction.” He held up his hand. “This is my most effective implement.” Cassie looked up into his eyes. She couldn’t see anything there but quiet calm. His hand was large, well tanned, and strong. “So, what do I do now?” He hid a grin. “Stand up and lay over my lap, young lady.” Cassie swallowed the lump in her throat. She couldn’t believe she was actually doing this. She was actually going to let him spank her. Now that it was about to happen, she was even more nervous, but not about the warm bottom. Hell, she was a cop, she’d likely had worse in the Academy. But the submission scared 20
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her to death. If anyone had told her that she’d put herself into this position, she’d have laughed her head off. “I don’t think I can.” Brandon gave her a look. “You can.” It was important at this stage, at least, that she willingly put herself into position. Later, it wouldn’t be the same, but for now, she had to understand that this was her choice. “But, the choice is yours. We can talk. But, I think it would be better for you to just go with it, before you can work yourself up and scare yourself.” “I think you’re enjoying this,” she grumbled. He didn’t hide the grin this time. “You bet.” “Oh, all right. Just do it and get it over with!” She stood and practically flopped across his lap. Brandon placed one hand at the small of her back, and the other on her jean-clad bottom. Part of him wished he’d had her take off the jeans, but it was too soon for that. She wiggled, adjusting her position and he smiled. Just a small lesson, he decided, and then they would talk further. “Don’t use your safeword unless you really need it, Cassie. Do you remember what it is?” She could certainly take a spanking, she thought wildly. Still, she placed a hand on his lap, just in case she decided to get herself out of this embarrassing position. “I remember it, and I won’t use it unless you go too far.” Brandon lifted his hand and gave bottom a light swat. He paused a moment, and felt her tense. He gave her a second. “I won’t go too far. This is just to get you used to me, and because you’re nervous. The unknown has that effect on most of us.” This wasn’t bad, Cassie thought. Hell, it didn’t even sting. She relaxed. The third smack had a little sting, but certainly nothing that made her consider getting herself out of this position, though she kept one hand on his thigh, just in case she did decide she wanted to get away from him. Brandon gave her two more smacks and paused, his hand resting on her bottom lightly. “Are you going to swear again, young lady?” Cassie considered her answer. “Probably,” she admitted, the imp in her ruling her better judgment. Brandon was glad she couldn’t see his face, because he was grinning, but he kept his voice firm. “Then perhaps the lesson hasn’t been quite learned yet.” He raised his hand and gave her a series of five smacks, in rapid succession. “Ouch!” Those last few had really stung! She turned her head and looked at him. “Are we done now?” 21
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“I’ll let you know when we are,” he promised, and smacked her cute ass again, a little gentler this time. He’d planned on this just being a first warm-up spanking, but maybe he should push the envelope just a little. See just how long she’d keep that stubborn streak. “You’re not asking me to stop, are you?” Cassie sighed. “No,” she mumbled petulantly. Brandon decided then and there that this spanking wouldn’t end until she said Sir without any prompting from him. He gave her several sharp smacks. Cassie felt her bottom begin to sting now. But it excited her, too. She wiggled a little, trying to ease the almost painful excitement in the pit of her stomach. She wasn’t the only one getting excited, but that wasn’t the purpose of this first spanking. He wanted her to know that it could be more, too. With him, it was always more. Not that he didn’t enjoy the erotic aspects, too, because he did. But for him, there was much more to D/s, and he wanted to have more from her. “Hold still,” he ordered. That wasn’t an order he usually gave, of course, because he knew it was hard to hold still. It was really more of a test of her willingness to obey. Cassie frowned at the tone of his voice. It was deep and more than a little stern. She turned her head and looked at him again. The look on his face was intense and determined. “Are you mad?” Brandon looked at her then. “No, of course not.” Anger and D/s never went hand in hand. Ever. That was a firm rule that he’d never broken. “You look—I don’t know, you look almost angry.” Brandon flipped her over in his lap and sat her up, keeping her on his lap. “I will never touch you if I’m angry with you, Cassandra.” She believed him. And she didn’t want him to stop, either. “Are you done?” He nodded. “Yes.” He paused a moment. “For now.” Cassie pouted. “Oh.” “Now, we’ll continue with the lesson. “ He stood her to her feet, and then stood himself. He took her hand and led her to the corner of the room. “Now, a little corner time, I think.” Cassie glared at him. Corner time? He was going to make her stand in the corner? Hell she hadn’t stood in a corner since she was five! “Why?”
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“Because, young lady, I said so.” He turned her so she was facing the corner, and gave her bottom a sharp smack. “No talking, either.” Cassie stood there, but she was fuming. She could feel him watching her. This was just stupid! After a few minutes, she turned and glared at him. “Can I come out now?” He considered her question. He looked at his watch. She’d lasted about four minutes. His little minx was not pleased, but she was obeying him. That was a good start. “You can come back over here and we’ll finish your spanking,” he offered. She thought they already had. “All right.” She walked back over to him and more stood before him, waiting for him to make the next move. Brandon looked up at her. Her cheeks were flushed, and she was breathing fast. She was definitely aroused. Hell, he was aroused. But he wanted this first time to be really about a lesson in D/s, not foreplay. It was time to turn up the heat, so to speak. “Now, take down the jeans, Cassandra.” “Take down the jeans?” she said, making it a question.. Just when had she become a damn parrot, she thought wildly. “I don’t think I’ve quite made my point yet. Unless you’d prefer a little more time in the corner…” He raised a brow, folding his hands across his chest. He hadn’t met a subbie yet that liked corner time. It was quite effective, he mused. “Fine!” She had already planned to have sex with him. What did it matter if he saw her ass? She tossed off her shoes, using her feet to fling them across the room. She nearly ripped off the button on her Levi’s as she opened them an lowered them, then she stepped out of them and tossed them across the room as well, then stood before him in nothing but her sweater and pink thong panties. “Satisfied?” Oh, nowhere near satisfied, he thought with an inward chuckle. She was beautiful—her face was flushed, but with temper now, and she stood rigidly before him. She was spectacular. Even though she was small, her legs were long and well formed. Beautiful, absolutely beautiful. He pointed to his lap. Cassie glared, but she flopped herself over his lap once more. Hell would freeze over before she’d ask him to stop, too! She tensed, waiting for the first smack. She felt his hand once more at the small of her back, a subtle way of letting her know who was in charge. She put her hand on his thigh again, and buried her face. 23
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Brandon looked at her white bottom. A perfect, very spankable ass. He grinned and rested his hand over the left cheek, then moved to the right. When he was finished, it would be a nice shade of pink. He started spanking, light smacks, alternating cheeks. Cassie relaxed. He wasn’t hurting her at all. The smacks were light—almost teasing in quality. “Is that as hard as you usually spank? This is nothing,” she said sarcastically. Brandon gave her a sharp smack for that little taunt. “Watch your tone,” then continued the light smacks, alternating cheeks. Cassie was tired of the light little taps. If she was going to experiment, she wanted to see what it was really about. “I don’t want to watch my tone.” She knew she was pushing, but damn it, she wanted him to get on with it. “Are you sure?” he retorted. Brandon decided to see just how far she really wanted him to go. He knew she was taunting him, but was she really willing to pay the price for that? He’d soon find out. Her bottom was barely pink, just getting warmed up. He knew she wasn’t ready for a real spanking yet, but he decided to give her a taste. He felt her tense after he delivered a sharp smack. “Better?” he asked. That last one had stung. She reached her hand around automatically to protect her bottom. Brandon caught her hand. “No, Cassandra. You asked for this, so put your hand back on my leg.” He released her hand, waiting to see if she’d comply. Slowly, she put her hand back down and gripped his thigh hard. She considered digging in her nails, but thought better of it. Her bottom was still stinging from that last smack, though. “Ok, I’ll be good.” “We’ll see.” He continued to spank, evenly paced spanks, although not hard as the last had been. Cassie’s bottom was starting to sting a little, but still nothing that worried her. It was still not doing much other than turning her on. She relaxed, and let herself just feel. Brandon immediately felt her relax, and smiled. It was almost time. The next several spanks were just a bit harder. Her bottom was a nice rosy pink now. She had an adorable ass, he thought again. Cassie winced. Ok, it was starting to sting more now. She wiggled a little bit, experimentally. She really did want to see what came next. This almost gentle spanking was just teasing her. 24
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“More?” he asked softly, pausing. He gently caressed her pink bottom, easing the sting with gentle fingers. Cassie moaned. His fingers felt nice. She could get used to this. She forgot all about the fact that she should probably be embarrassed. “I don’t know. I thought it would hurt more.” “Are you sure you’re ready for that?” he asked. He gave her one hard smack on each cheek. More like the smacks he would use for a punishment, not just for playful scenes. Immediately, he rubbed away the sting. “Oww! Maybe not!” She reached back once more to rub, and again, her hand was grabbed. “Don’t reach back, Cassandra.” He held her hand and gave her five hard smacks, moving up and down her bottom, then several lighter ones, just at the edge of her bottom, at the top of her thighs—the sit spot was the most sensitive part of the bottom. There were several reasons he didn’t allow a sub to put her hands back—the main one, that he didn’t want to accidentally hit her hands and hurt her. But she didn’t need to know that yet. She just had to learn not to reach back. “Ok, ok! But that stung!” Not enough that she wanted him to stop, though. Amazed, she found that she wanted still more. Both the light smacks, and the harder ones. He stopped spanking a moment. “It was supposed to. Don’t put your hands back again, I mean it.” He smacked her again, several sharp smacks in quick succession. “Do you understand?” “I can’t help it!” “Yes you can.” He moved her hand back to his leg. “Consider this a reminder.” He started to spank in earnest now, light smacks designed to sting, but not really hurt. He didn’t stop, not even when she started to try and wiggle away from him. He just tightened his hand around her waist and held her in place. He wasn’t spanking hard, but he knew that she was really starting to feel it now. He kept his hand moving, not centering on one spot too long. He didn’t want to bruise this beautiful ass, just make it hot. Cassie wanted him to stop. It was really, really starting to burn now. She felt her eyes start to burn—not from real pain, but she was going to start crying all the same, and she didn’t want him to see that. “Stop, ok?” Brandon paused. “Do you remember your safeword?” He gently caressed her burning bottom, once more easing the sting. “Y—yes,” she whispered. “I remember it.” 25
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He started spanking again. Stop wasn’t the safeword, and he’d already planned to stop long before she even considered using it. He kept her off guard now, changing between lighter smacks, and harder ones. But the smacks were constant now. “Will you remember not to put your hands back again?” he demanded between smacks. “Yes! Yes!” she insisted. “Please stop now.” Brandon gave her several more spanks, watching for her hand. It lifted off his leg several times, but she didn’t move it back. Cassie started to struggle. She wanted him to stop. She was crying and didn’t even really know why. Brandon paused again, holding her in place tightly. When she tensed, he loosened his hold on her waist, and started to caress her bottom gently again, once more easing the sting. He’d pushed as far as she was ready for at this stage. “Relax, Cassie.” But he didn’t let her up yet, he continued to caress her warmed bottom gently. “You did very well for your first spanking.” Cassie was crying quietly, but now that he wasn’t spanking her, she tried to compose herself. She didn’t want him to think she was weak. “Y-you don’t have to stop.” What was she saying? A minute ago, she’d been asking him to do just that. He gave her a few more light smacks, on the sit-spot, near the tops of her thighs. He’d been going to stop, even though she hadn’t said sir yet, because she was crying. He wanted to teacher her that she could trust him. He needed her to know that it was safe to show him her tears. He doubted she realized he knew she was crying. He wanted her to share that with him. To do that, he had to break through that resistance. “Then I won’t. But playtime is over,” he warned.
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Chapter Three Cassie was crying harder now, but something in her wanted to see just how far this would go. She’d had a small taste of what this D/s might encompass, and she wanted to see more. She believed he would stop instantly if she used the safeword they’d decided upon. Still, she wanted to be sure. “You’ll stop if I use my safeword?” He stopped caressing her bottom a moment. “You have my word, Cassie. Is that what this is all about? A test to see if I’ll keep my word?” He knew the answer, of course. In part, it was exactly that. She was testing him, and he could understand that. The question was—did she understand it? “No, Sir,” she mumbled. Ah, so she had learned something. Good. A little more spanking, and he’d have her right where he wanted her. “Good girl.” He started spanking her again, not hard, just consistent, designed to bring her to where he knew she needed to go now. Cassie wished she’d kept her big mouth shut. The spanking was burning a lot, and the smacks he delivered to the area near her thighs stung more. She couldn’t help wiggling now, and probably would have slid off his lap if he hadn’t firmed his hold around her waist. The spanking continued, each smack burning on her tender bottom. She’d lost count of how many times his hand raised and fell, but it seemed to go on forever. She couldn’t hold back the tears anymore. Didn’t even want to. But they were somehow a release, too. Her hand, of its own volition, went back to cover her bottom. Brandon barely caught his hand in mid-spank. He’d damn near gotten her hand, and that irritated him. This time, he didn’t just hold her hand, he flipped her over quickly. “What did I say about the hands?” he demanded. She looked up into his face. She struggled to a sitting position, tears on her cheeks. “I didn’t mean to.” He gave her a little hug. “I know, Cassandra, but you have to learn to keep your hands out of the way.” He took the offending hand in his and kissed the palm. “I could hurt you if I smacked your hand at the wrong angle,” he explained. “Oh. I thought you were just being bossy.” 27
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“Careful, Cassie. You can just as easily find yourself over my lap rather than on it.” He softened the words by brushing his fingers across her cheeks, wiping the tears away with gentle fingers. “Are you ok?” She nodded, but she couldn’t stop crying. “You’re disappointed.” He looked surprised, and tilted her chin up. “Why would you say that?” He hugged her close, kissed her pouting lips gently. She didn’t answer, just shrugged. What was she supposed to say? He hadn’t hurt her, yet here she was, damn near a basket case. He ran his hands from her hair down her back, then rested one on her warm bottom, giving it a little pat. She had the sexiest ass. He couldn’t have possibly been more pleased with her. The scene had gone on much longer than he’d planned, but she had been with him all the way. “Tell me, Cassie.” She lifted her head and looked at him. “You stopped.” He grinned. Not necessarily because he’d wanted to, he thought. “Yes, I stopped. Are you upset because I did?” She thought about that. Was she? During the last part of the spanking, she’d wanted him to stop. Now, she wondered why. The only thing really bothering her was that he was seeing her cry. “Are you?” “Cassie, if you want me to spank you again, I assure you, I won’t mind a bit.” He paused and brushed more tears off her cheeks, then patted her bottom again. “But, I think you’ve probably had enough for your first spanking.” “I’m being silly.” “Why do you say that?” he asked. “Talk to me Cassie.” She sighed. “I don’t want you to be angry or disappointed.” She wasn’t ready yet to question why what a near-stranger thought of her would even be important. “I’m not angry, little one. Nor am I disappointed. Are you?” “I—not really, just embarrassed. I’m crying like a little girl, you must think I’m stupid.” “A sub usually cries when she’s being spanked. It’s nothing to be embarrassed about. Crying is a release, little one.” He hugged her tightly, kissing the top of her pretty hair. “Just be glad I didn’t do what usually do when hands go where they don’t belong, though. A lash with a belt across the palms reminds a sub pretty quickly to keep their hands out of the way,” he explained. “You’d do that?” she asked, eyes wide. 28
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“When you consider that the alternative could break your hand? You bet I would—and have.” It was a punishment, pure and simple, though. He used it rarely, and although he did like to give a sound spanking, he’d never had to use that particular punishment more than once or twice on any of his previous subs. Once or twice was sufficient to remind her to keep her hands back. If it was a real issue, though, he just held the subs hands out of the way himself. Sometimes a sub really couldn’t keep their hands down. It was reflexive. She looked incredulous. “I’ll try and remember not to put my hands back again,” she promised. She shivered. That would have to hurt—a lot. He pulled her back and tilted up her chin. “If you ever put your hands back again, Cassie, I will stop the spanking, and take off my belt. Remember that.” She winced. “I thought you said D/s wasn’t about abuse.” “It’s not. But it’s my job, as a Dom, to protect you. It’s my job to make sure you’re not injured when we are playing, or you’re being punished. I don’t strap hands often, and I don’t like to do it. However, I can and will, and it’s not abuse. And it’s not a part of any kind of play scene, either. I would never do that to you without warning you first. If you need to do something with your hand, you are welcome to hold onto my leg like you did earlier.” He paused a moment, studying her. “But, if you really can’t keep them out of the way, I can hold your hand away myself.” Cassie remembered a teacher she’d had in school that had used a ruler on the palms of students. It had been uncomfortable, to say the least, but even the school hadn’t considered it abuse. “I’m sorry.” He lifted her easily off his lap and sat her next to him. He reached down and unbuckled his leather belt and pulled it from the loops. “Are you afraid of me now?” he demanded softly. “No,” she said. It was the truth. She wasn’t afraid of him, but there was more to him than she had first thought. She looked warily at the belt in his hands, then back to his penetrating eyes. “What are you going to do?” “I don’t want you ever to be afraid of me, Cassandra. I want you to always feel safe with me. But, I want to feel safe with you, too. If I ever hurt you accidentally, I’d be furious with myself. Not all spankings are done with a hand. So, I’m going to show you what you can expect if you reach back again during a 29
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spanking.” He held the lower few inches of the belt in his right hand and held out his left. “Give me your hand, Cassandra.” “Um…I don’t want to.” “I’d be surprised if you did. Do it anyway.” She put her hands behind her back defensively. “I don’t want you to.” He sat the belt down, looking at her intently. “Are you safewording?” She shook her head. “I’m asking.” He looked at her, considering, and then nodded. “All right, Cassie. But if you put your hands back again, I will stop wherever I am and give each palm a lash with my belt. You need to understand that, Cassandra. I am very serious.” Cassie sighed. “I can’t promise.” “I know, that’s why this is an effective reminder.” “I think the threat will be reminder enough,” she muttered, disgruntled. Brandon nodded. “I hope so, little one. I wouldn’t enjoy it, but I’d do it.” She shivered. “I’d hate to make you angry.” He was strong, very strong. She suddenly realized that she was a little afraid now. Brandon sighed, frustrated. “Anger and D/s do not ever go hand in hand, Cassandra. Ever. Sooner or later, I have little doubt that you will make me angry. What you need to understand, though, is that I’d never hurt you in anger.” She kept saying the wrong thing. She was crying again. Angry with herself, she went across the room for her jeans. “The jeans stay off, Cassie.” He had to admit, though, the view, as she bent for them was spectacular. He did love her cute bottom, especially when it was a nice pink. He was definitely an ass man. She looked at him. “Why?” “Because I said so.” He was back in that Dom mode, she noted. His voice changed subtly when he did. Still…”Why?” Part of her appeal was her feistiness. But he did want her to learn when to just do as she was told. There were times when he would welcome open debate and discussion. Hell, he was attracted to intelligent women who had their own minds and opinions. But he was also a Dom. For now, that is the part of their relationship he wanted to keep her centered on. “I’d thought 30
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that your first lesson was adequate, Cassandra. Apparently, I was mistaken.“ He pointed. “Corner, please.” He didn’t grin till she turned away and looked at the corner. He half expected her to tell him to go to hell. She was a delight. His eyes were glued on her pert little butt as she stomped to the corner. Brandon watched her fidget as she stood silently in the corner. He could almost read her mind, now. “I think five minutes should do.” She whirled around. “I am not standing in this corner for five minutes in my underwear.” “Now, it will be ten minutes,” he decided. She sputtered, furious. “Why are you doing this?” “Did or did you not want to explore D/s?” “I don’t remember reading anything about writing lines and standing in corners, damn it. I think you’re getting off on being an ass.” Brandon stood up and walked over to her. He took her arms in his hands and frowned down at her. “This isn’t a contest of wills, Cassie. And, although it can be a game, and a fun game, right now, we’re not playing in the true sense of the word. I have a reason for everything that I do. I’m willing to discuss anything with you. But I will not stand here and be insulted.” Cassie lowered her head. “I’m sorry.” He nodded stiffly. “Now, I’m going to go sit down and cool off, before I say something I’ll regret. Meanwhile, you can stand where you are and think about what I’m going to do when I’ve cooled down.” She gulped. “You’re angry.” “Getting there, little one, so take care what comes out of your mouth next.” He smiled grimly. “I am seriously considering having you write 500 times I will not be disrespectful after I make sure that sitting down is extremely uncomfortable.” He took her by the shoulders and turned her back around so she faced the corner once more. He wasn’t really angry, but he didn’t like being called an ass, either. If he knew her better, rather, if she knew him better, she’d be getting a taste of her own hairbrush about now. He walked back over to the couch and pondered what to do when her time in the corner was over. He checked his watch. Cassie stood fidgeting. It was going to be a long ten minutes. She’d never been good at controlling her mouth, often regretting 31
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what she said later. More than once it had gotten her in trouble with her boss. Not to mention her teachers in school, and her father. She shook her head. She didn’t want to even think about him. Brandon waited a full ten minutes before he spoke. “Cassandra?” She turned. “I really am sorry. I didn’t mean what I said.” He smiled. “I’m glad you didn’t mean it. But, I think we might want to work on that—the habit to say things you don’t mean when you don’t get your way.” “I suppose.” He shook his head. “One of my jobs, Cassie, is to help you work on things that you want to work on. Does it bother you that you say things you don’t mean when you’re frustrated?” She sighed, folding her hands. “Yes, Sir.” “Come sit with me, little one.” “Are you still mad?” He shook his head. “I’m not mad. But we need to talk.” He patted the spot next to him on the couch. “Come sit, please.” Cassie nodded and went to sit next to him. “I really am sorry, Brandon.” Brandon smiled. “It’s ok. I’m sure this won’t be the last time one of us says something they don’t mean.” He paused a minute, considering what he wanted to say next. “Tell me something. What are some things you would like to change or improve in your life?” “I don’t know. I suppose a lot of things. I have a pretty quick temper.” A true redhead. Somehow, that didn’t surprise him. “Good thing I don’t. Ok, what else?” She shrugged. “I can’t think of anything off the top of my head.” “Are you willing to have me help you work on that quick temper? And the mouth?” he asked. “I can’t promise you’ll like my methods, though.” “I don’t know much about you, Brandon. And, you know even less about me!” He tugged her onto his lap. “You know that I write books. I’m thirty-four and I’ve never been married. I’m also a cop.” Cassie paled, her eyes wide as she looked up at him. Was it possible? Was he really a cop? “Are you really a cop?” He frowned when she paled. “What? Don’t like cops?” 32
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She shook her head. “That’s not it at all.” The frown deepened. “Then enlighten me, please. What did I say that upset you?” “I’m a cop, Brandon. Here in Watts County. I—I’ve been a detective for two years.” He laughed out loud. “You’re a cop? Really?” “Why is that funny?” she demanded. “Sheesh, a damn cop. Leave it to me to get on the Internet and find a cop.” “Damn cop?” “Yes! I don’t date other cops! Most of them are complete and total jerks!” He couldn’t help but grin. “Jerks, huh? Well, I don’t know about that. Male chauvinists, perhaps, but jerks? “ “So, are you a male chauvinist, too?” she asked curiously. “Nope. I’m a Dom. Two totally different animals. I’m all for women’s liberation. And before you ask, I don’t have a problem with women in law enforcement.” She sighed. “Shit.” He laughed again. “What are you thinking? Don’t worry, I’m not going to arrest you for liking to be spanked.” She only glared at him. “This isn’t funny! If any of the guys I work with find out…” He sobered instantly. “Cassandra, just stop it. Anything that happens between us is just between us. I don’t spank and tell.” “How did you ever pass the psych evaluation?” He was insulted. “D/s isn’t a mental illness, Cassandra. We come in all walks of life. I’ve always known that I like to be in control. It’s not something I’m ashamed of, but it’s not something that I feel the need to share with every Tom, Dick, and Harry, either. It’s my personal life.” “Oh hell. Now I’ve insulted you. I didn’t mean you were sick or anything. I’m so confused!” He gave her a little shake. “Watch your mouth,” he warned softly. She actually laughed. “Do you know how often I swear?” “On the job, I couldn’t care less. Here, with me, you won’t.” She gave him a hard look. “Another of your little dictates?” “I’ve told you, I don’t think ladies should swear. I believe you’ve already gotten one warmed seat over it. Care to try for another?” “I’m not going to be spanked every time I forget and say damn or hell, Brandon.” 33
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“I’m not saying that. Call it a quirk, but I just don’t like it when a woman swears. Especially when I’m in Dom mode.” “Ok, fine.” She really did swear entirely too much, and knew it. “God you’re cute when you pout,” he said with a grin. “Are you trying to make me mad?” she demanded. “Nope. I’m just trying to teach you about me. Now, tell me about you,” he said with a grin. “How old are you?” “I’m twenty-nine. I’m also single, and have never been married. My last name is O’Rourke, and most men seem to be afraid of me or something.” He chuckled and gave her a hug. “I promise, I’m not afraid of you.” She laughed at that. “No, I guess you aren’t. So, can I put my pants back on, now?” He shook his head and flipped her over his lap again. Her pert little butt was still a little pink. He caressed it again, moving his hands across it gently. “I like you like this,” he teased. “Your ass is adorable, by the way. I like spanking it, too.” “You want to spank me again?” She felt a little thrill of excitement. “I think you can safely assume that I’ll always want to spank you. But usually it will just be for both our enjoyment.” She flushed. His hands felt nice, though. She had to admit she liked his hands on her. “But,” she turned her head around to look at him. “If we both enjoy it, then how does it work in a real D/s relationship? When you really think I should be punished for something.” He flipped her back over and pulled her onto his lap. “That’s a valid question. Tell me something. Did you like standing in the corner?” “No,” she said instantly. “How about writing lines?” he pressed. “And, by the way, I think you know I meant write not type. If I have you do lines again, they are to be hand written. “No, I wouldn’t like it. I didn’t like it in school, either.” “And if I ever strap your hands?” She knew she wouldn’t like that. She shivered. “No.” He nodded, not missing the shiver. “So, there are things that you don’t enjoy. How bout sitting here in your panties?” Cassie flushed. “It’s embarrassing,” she admitted. 34
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“Right now, it is. But, it’s also to make you feel more submissive—doing what I want, not what you would prefer.” He smiled and caressed her cheek. “Although, soon, you won’t mind me looking at all.” “But I think I like being spanked, so I don’t see how that’s going to teach me much.” “Ah, I see. But today, I was just giving you an introduction. When you’ve earned a real spanking, I don’t think you’ll enjoy it much at all.” Cassie frowned. “So, it would be harder?” He nodded his head, brushed her cheek. “I have a wooden bath brush that I use for punishment on occasion.” “Ouch.” “Exactly. But, I promise you, I don’t need a brush to get my point across. More often than not, I use nothing but my hand.” He held his hand up. “Seems to work pretty well.” “So, the point is to make me cry?” “Partly. I want you to feel comfortable enough with me to let go. To know that you’re safe with me, no matter the situation. Crying is a good release, and—this is important—crying is never supposed to be embarrassing.” “I don’t ever cry.” “Do you see crying as a weakness?” he asked curiously. “Of course I do. It makes me weak.” Brandon frowned at her. “No, it doesn’t, Cassie. It’s not weakness at all. But it is a sign of giving up control, and letting your emotions come out. I fully intended to make you cry.” “Why?” “Because you needed to,” he said simply. “A large part of being a Dom is giving a sub what she not only wants—but what she needs. A good Dom knows that. The subbie is always in the uppermost thoughts of her Dom’s mind. Or at least she should be.” “It’s embarrassing. I’m a cop. I’ve been hurt on the job more than once, and I sure haven’t cried.” “It’s not meant to be. I consider it a gift. It’s not a weakness to trust someone enough to let go with him or her, Cassie. It’s a gift that a good Dom appreciates.” He knew that she didn’t fully understand what he was trying to explain to her, but she would understand with time. “So, every time you spank me, you think I’ll cry?” 35
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Brandon grinned. “No, not every time. Just when that is the intent of the spanking. Naughty little girls tend to cry when they are spanked.” “I’m not a little girl,” she said, bristling. He gave her a sloe look. “No, you’re not a little girl. You’re a beautiful desirable woman.” He paused, choosing his words carefully. “But sometimes it can be nice to be treated like one, don’t you think?” She shrugged, not ready to answer that. “So, what are the rules here?” “Oh, there are a lot of rules involved, Cassie. I have quite a few rules.” She groaned. “Is now a good time to mention that I don’t like rules much?” “All the better for me, because you see, I do like spanking.” “I hadn’t noticed,” she said, wide-eyed. “I’ve never denied that I did. I’ll even admit that it’s a turn on for me. A huge one. I love to watch a cute bottom turn a nice pink.” “So, isn’t that really BDSM? “ “Maybe to some degree. I’m not into bondage so much, though. And I’m not a sadist. I like to spank, we’ve established that. I like to watch a cute ass turn pink when I spank it. So, maybe that is a little strange to the vanilla world.” He paused a moment. “On the subbie side, liking to be spanked doesn’t make you a masochist. It’s not about liking to be hurt. Even in a vanilla relationship, there is a point where pain is erotic. Think of it like this: Have you ever, during sex, been turned on by a nibble on your neck, or having a man nip your nipples? In a D/s relationship, there is just a more intense feeling of arousal with a little pain. It’s not about inflicting pain for me. It’s just a turn-on for me to spank. For me, there is not a lot more erotic than having a woman wiggling across my lap.” Cassie flushed, but nodded. “Ok. So, what kinds of things earn punishment in your opinion?” “There are a lot of things. Not all of them are things I’d give you a serious spanking for. Eventually, you’ll trust me enough to not use a safeword, though.” “Oh, I think I might if you ever went near my hairbrush or wanted to strap my hands.” He was instantly serious. His dark eyes intent on her face. “Cassandra, once we know each other very well, and progress in 36
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this relationship we’re starting—you will not be able to get out of a spanking with a safeword. They are only intended for when you are seriously frightened, or when a scene moves past what you are able to physically tolerate. They can be used quite often in a club scene, for instance. But they are rarely used in a true D/s relationship where the sub trusts the Dom.” “So, if I used a safeword, you wouldn’t stop?” “I’d stop, Cassie. But you wouldn’t like it if I did. A safeword isn’t to be used lightly. We’ll learn about each other, and I will probably push your limits, but I won’t surpass them. You’ll grow, though. And we’ll both learn about each other. Tell me, were you ever spanked as a child?” “Yes.” She wasn’t ready to discuss her father with him. “Well, I understand that your job is dangerous. So, you don’t have to worry about me spanking you for doing your job. But, if I ever find out you took a needless risk with yourself, believe me, there will be hell to pay. You’ll eat your dinner sitting on a pillow.” She felt that little thrill of excitement again. “Brush, huh?” “Oh yeah. Definitely brush.” “I wouldn’t take kindly to being bruised.” “I don’t ever bruise, Cassie. I know my own strength. Some like to spank till there are bruises. Hell, some subs like it. I don’t.” “How many subs have you had?” “Quite a few. Usually, they aren’t from this area. I have quite a few friends that I’ve met on the Internet. Some, I’ve done scenes with in real life. Others, we just play online. I enjoy fantasy scenes in my online study.” He chuckled. “They can be very real for a sub, though. I’ve used them when a sub is out of the area and needs a refresher. Sometimes, they are fun, sometimes they aren’t. I’ve had subs type a thousand or so lines while in the study.” “I think I might like to try the study scene—without the lines.” He grinned at her, the dimple in his cheek deepening. “Anytime, little one. Anytime.” “Now?” He pondered that. “No, I don’t think now is the right time. You don’t know me well enough yet for that kind of scene. The real life ones are quite intense, and you’re very new to this.” She pouted. “I want to learn more, though.” 37
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“And you will. Remember that little insult a while ago? We haven’t finished addressing it, yet.” “Utoh.” “And just so we are clear on another thing, Cassie. I am always Sir during a scene. It’s one of the ways to let the sub go where she needs to go—to let her feel really submissive. It’s not meant to make you feel like I’m better. It’s just to help you remember who is in control.” “I can deal with that.” She wanted him to take her to that place where she felt safe and protected with him, and free to let go. “Good. Now, go back to your corner, young lady.” “Yes Sir.” Obediently, she walked back to the corner, grumbling beneath her breath the whole while. “Take off the sweater, Cassandra. Perhaps a sample of the study.” He waited to see if she was as brave as she thought she was. Cassie looked at him for a long moment and gulped, but removed her sweater and sat it on her computer desk. She was in nothing but bra and panties now.
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Chapter Four Brandon watched her for the next several minutes. She finally leaned against the edge of the wall. “Stand straight, young lady.” Cassie straightened. That tone of voice did things to her. She wondered what he was going to do when her corner time was over. She really, really didn’t like corners. Maybe later they could negotiate the whole corner bit. Brandon looked at his watch. Time was up. “Come here.” Cassie turned and looked at him. “What now, Sir?” “First, please go get your hairbrush, assuming you have a nice wooden one, with a flat back.” “I—I don’t know if I do or not,” she whispered. She wasn’t entirely sure she wanted to have him use a brush on her. His hand was one thing, but even some of those smacks had really stung. She remembered when her mom had taken a brush to her. She’d run in front of a car and almost been hit. She’d been ten, and had literally eaten her dinner sitting on a pillow that night. “I have my own out in the car,” he pointed out. “Or I could just use my belt…” “Belt?” she squeaked. He gave her a hard look. “I warned you that I didn’t like to be insulted.” “Do I have a choice?” “No, not really. Just between a brush and a belt.” Of course, he didn’t intend to give her a hard spanking, whichever she chose. It was her trust he was determined to have before the day was done. “I’d also like to have your word that you will not use your safeword unless you are truly afraid.” “No, I won’t use it,” she whispered. “I think, uh, I’ll pick the brush. But I really don’t have anything but a bath brush. It’s one of those that they sell in Wal-Mart.” “That will do fine.” He was sure that he had the same one sitting in a bag in his car. “Go get it, please.” “Yes Sir.” She walked into her bathroom and pulled the brush off her shelf. It was oval shaped and thick wood. She knew that it would also sting like hell. Her hand was shaking when she walked back into the living room, but she handed the brush over to him. 39
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“Thank you.” He took the brush and stood up. He held out his hand, and waited to see if she’d take it. Cassie looked at his hand. She loved his hands. They were large and long fingered. She knew they could bring pleasure or pleasure-pain. She placed her hand in his. “Now, just so there are no misunderstandings. The first spanking you got today was mostly just to let you know what it was all about. Do you think you deserve another one?” “Yes, Sir,” she whispered. “Tell me why,” he ordered. He tapped the brush against his palm. “I insulted you.” “Is that all?” “I talked back?” “Is that a question or a statement, Cassie?” “I talked back,” she said softly. “Are you afraid of me?” At that moment, she was—just a bit. “A little,” she admitted. He nodded. That was fine. She needed to be wary when she’d pushed the limits too far. He’d have been surprised if she hadn’t been a bit afraid. But, he did want to show her she never had reason to really fear him. Subs submitted out of love and respect, not true fear. Now was as good a time as any to learn another aspect of D/s. “I want your word that you will not put your hands back this time.” “I can’t promise that,” she whispered. “I don’t know how much pain I can take.” “I won’t hurt you, Cassandra.” This was a fear, though, that he could actually see on her face. She was afraid of that. He picked up his belt. “One on each palm, Cassandra. Hold out your right hand, please.” He stood and walked to where she stood. “And do not pull it back until I say you can.” “Please,” she whispered, holding her hands back. “I don’t want you to do this.” “Do as you’re told, young lady,” he ordered. He’d already decided to give her hand a light brush with the belt, he had to get her past the real fear of it. He knew it was more than wariness. She was afraid. Cassie held out her hand, but she couldn’t stop it from shaking. Brandon lifted her hand and held it in his left one gently. He lifted the belt and brought it down quickly on her upturned palm, although not hard, just hard enough to sting a little bit. 40
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Cassie winced and pulled her hand back, starting to rub it on her thigh. “No rubbing. It’s supposed to sting. Now, the other.” It hadn’t been as bad as she’d thought, but she now knew that he hadn’t intended for it to be. She held her left palm out. He raised the belt again and lashed her palm once, again, just hard enough to sting. She looked up at him with wide eyes, really wanting to rub her hands together. It really did sting. Brandon sat the belt back on the table and took her hands in his, rubbing gently now to ease the sting. “Remember; don’t put your hands back, alright?” “Yes Sir.” The sting was already going away. But she’d certainly remember to keep them back. “Now, go to your room and find a corner. I’ll be there shortly.” “My room?” He preferred to use his study as he had all his toys there, and the perfect corner, but this would do. “Yes.” She nodded and walked to her room, wondering how long he’d make her wait. She resisted the urge to slam the door shut. She walked to the only empty corner in her room, next to the closet. Brandon picked up the brush and his belt and followed her only a minute later. Anticipation was part of the entire process. It both enhanced the scene, and gave the subbie time to think about whatever she’d done to earn a spanking. She was standing in the corner, not moving an inch. Her cute ass was white again, no remnants of his earlier spanking. Her room was very feminine. Her bed was a large four-poster, with matching dresser and nightstands. The comforter on the bed was blue. On the walls, there were shelves lined with porcelain dolls. He sat down on the edge of the bed. “Come here now, young lady.” Cassie turned and looked at him, thinking wildly that it was a good thing that she’d made her bed. What a silly thing to think about right now. She walked the few steps to the edge of the bed. He’d put both the brush and his belt next to him. “I didn’t think you were going to use the belt.” “It’s a reminder to keep your hands out of the way,” he explained. 41
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“Oh.” Well, it was an effective reminder. She wasn’t likely to forget. “So, what are you going to do now?” That was a valid question. She didn’t really know all the mechanics of this. “A warm up.” That didn’t sound too bad. “Do I lie over your lap again?” “Yes. I want one hand on the bed and the other on my leg. Your feet on the floor.” She did as she was told. She was likely not really going to enjoy this, and he’d debated whether or not it was a good idea, but went with his gut. He started the spanking, light smacks, on both cheeks, from the top of her bottom to just the edge of her bottom. He started slowly, but was consistent. Each smack was designed to prepare her for a harder spanking. By the time he was finished, she wouldn’t feel guilty for insulting him. “Tell me again why you are being spanked, young lady,” he said sternly, not letting up on the smacks. She wriggled, but didn’t try and pull away. “Because I insulted you.” “And how did you feel after you did?” he asked. “Guilty,” she admitted. “I really am sorry.” When she started to wiggle again, he placed his hand across the small of her back. She had the softest skin. What he really wanted to do, though, was turn her over and make love to her. But the time for that would be later, maybe not even tonight. “I know you are.” He started to smack her a little harder. Her bottom was getting pinker now. “Are you going to insult me again?” he asked, the next series of smacks centered on the sit spot. “No!” she said quickly. She lifted her hand, but quickly put it back down. “I won’t insult you again.” He continued to spank, moving all over her bottom now. “And are you going to talk back again?” he asked. Again, he delivered a series of smart spanks. The sound of flesh meeting flesh filled the room. “No, no, no!’ she said very quickly. He certainly seemed to like that spot. And it stung more than the rest of her bottom did. How did he know that? “No what?” he said, giving her one hard whap on each cheek. “No Sir,” she said quickly.
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“You are having problems with Sir, aren’t you, little one?” he asked, continuing to spank. He was spanking her a little harder now, letting her get a feel of a more real spanking. “I—I’ll get better,” she promised. Oh, she wished he’d stop a minute and rub again. She tensed when his hand across her back tightened and moved around her waist. “Don’t tense up, Cassandra.” He smacked her a little harder, leaving a red imprint of his palm on the left cheek. “I can’t help it,” she muttered. “Aren’t you done yet?” He heard the rising panic in her voice. But he didn’t know if it was really fear or not. It was time to give her a little break, though. He paused, resting his hand on her warmed bottom. “Now, I think a little more corner time.” Cassie turned her head and looked up at him. “Again?” He smacked her again, hard. “Are you allowed to question me?” “No, no. Corner it is, I promise!” She scrambled to her feet when he lifted his hand, and nearly ran to the corner. Her hands moved back to rub her warm bottom. She wanted to see if it was as warm as it felt. He let her get away with the rubbing this time; at least for a moment. Since she couldn’t see him, she didn’t know he was grinning. She would make a hell of a sub. He had little doubt that she’d keep him on his toes. He didn’t want a weak woman for a sub. He wanted one that was feisty, brave and one that knew her mind. He wanted her. “No rubbing, young lady. When it’s time to rub, I’ll do the rubbing.” She grinned despite herself at that. She wanted him to rub. She wanted him to rub everywhere, though. Not just her tender bottom. She was still wary, but she was getting excited, too. Brandon watched her quietly. She was still a little frightened, he knew that, and expected it. But he didn’t think she was even close to really learning the difference between a playful spanking and a real one. This one had to be a real one, though. He wanted her to know and understand the difference. “Alright, you can come back over now.” Cassie looked back over at him now. He was holding the brush in his hand this time, though. Once more, her heart started to pound in her chest, and there were butterflies in the pit of her stomach. The excitement of a moment before was quickly evaporating. Slowly, she walked back over to him, stopping right in front of him. “Yes Sir.” 43
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He liked hearing those words, he admitted to himself. “There is a big difference between a real spanking and a playful one. The more serious the offense, the worse the spanking will be. I will be extremely disappointed if you ever insult me without cause again. Do you understand?” Lecturing was designed solely to remind the submissive of that submission. It also conveyed disapproval, as subs didn’t like to disappoint their Dom. Her throat was so dry; she could only nod her head. She kept looking from his face to the brush. She was beginning to wonder if she should have chosen the belt. “May I ask a question?” she asked nervously. “Of course.” He waited patiently. “Um, how many with the brush?” she asked hesitantly. Her only experiences with a hairbrush had not been at all fun. “What do you think is a good number?” Subs always intended to think of harsher punishments than he did. The guiltier they felt, the more they thought they needed. He usually picked a number somewhere between what they thought and what he’d planned. Just how guilty did she feel? “I don’t know how to answer that!” “Hmmm. Fifty?” he asked. Of course she’d never know he wouldn’t do such a thing. She panicked now. “Fifty?” He couldn’t remember if he’d ever given someone more than twenty before. At least not real ones. Some subs liked the brush though, and he’d oblige them when they did. In actuality, he preferred using his hand. It was much more personal. “Too much?” he asked curiously. “No, Sir. I was wrong, and I knew it.” But she was scared now. Not so much about it hurting; but that it would bring back memories that she’d worked to bury. “Ah, part of the lesson already learned. I think we’ll find a good number somewhere in the middle.” “Do you want me back over your lap?” “Not just yet. Have you ever been paddled before?” “Yes,” she admitted. “I ran in front of a car.” She was willing to tell him that much at least. “Oh, I think you can safely assume that would earn quite a spanking. Now, I need to know: Are you afraid of me now?” “A little.” He looked around the room, he considered the chair in the corner, but in the end decided to use the bed rather than having her 44
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bend over the chair. He was a little worried her hands would come back, and he didn’t want to risk getting her hands with the brush. He stood up and took a pillow from the head of the bed and placed it near the edge, then put another one in her hands. “Hold on to this pillow. I want you to lie over the other.” A few different positions could be interesting, and exciting. But it would also increase her sensations, and that is what he wanted. It wasn’t as personal, and for this lesson, he wanted her to remember that it was disciplinary, not sexual. “Now, lay across the pillow, with it under your waist so your bottom is raised up a little. Rest your feet on the floor. Hold the other one in your hands to remind you to keep them out of the way. If you put your hands back, remember what I’ve told you I’d do.” This reminded her of a student in school being paddled. She’d heard stories of kids being bent over chairs for a paddling. “Yes Sir.” She placed herself as he’d directed. Every muscle in her body was tensed like a bowstring. She wasn’t sure what to expect. Brandon sighed, almost wishing he hadn’t even mentioned the brush but now that he’d started this, he’d have to finish it. He sat down next to her, deciding that he better have a hand across her back to hold her still in case she tried to turn. He had an excellent aim, but could miss if she moved around too much. He started spanking, his hand moving all over her bottom. He was surprised that she wasn’t crying. He wondered if she was trying to prove to him how brave she was. But, he would make her cry. The guilt would ease with the flow of tears. He knew that the tears wouldn’t be from pain, but release; the goal of his discipline. Her bottom was a nice pink again, and only a little warm to the touch. He decided to give her a little more of a warm-up before he used the brush. He brought his hand down in a series of smacks, although not hard. She was wiggling, and probably had no idea how much of a turn on that was for him. She was sexy as hell, but now wasn’t the time to think of sex. He started to spank a little harder, now. Centering most of the smacks right in the fleshiest part of her bottom. It was the least sensitive, but eventually, it would start to sting. He started spanking quickly now. “Ouch! Aren’t you almost done?” Her bottom was beginning to really burn now. “It’s supposed to sting, remember?” he said firmly. Her voice hadn’t been afraid, it sounded more like she was getting angry. “I 45
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want you to remember this for a while.” He swatted her lighter, but didn’t stop. “Enough!” she yelled. She started to kick her legs, trying to move away from the stinging slaps. He held her tighter, though. He gave her a hard smack. “That’s for me to decide, young lady!” He continued to spank, gently now. Finally, he stopped. Cassie sighed with relief. She’d been on the verge of tears, and that embarrassed her more than being bent over her bed with a man she barely knew spanking her ass. “Are you d—done? “No.” He picked up the wooden brush and sat it on her bottom, moving it across it gently, letting her get the feel of it. She wiggled again, but not because he was hurting her. The cool brush felt good on her warm bottom and she sighed. Brandon grinned a little. So, she was still able to be excited. Part of him really liked that. She could easily match his desire with her own. She wanted this. Her body language said so. At least a big part of her wanted it. Finally, he lifted the brush and gave her a light swat right across the center of her bottom. She jerked, but otherwise didn’t move. He gave her a second and third swat, once on each cheek. “I’m sorry!” “Yes,” he said simply. Suddenly, he wanted her over his lap again. He wanted to feel her wiggle against his thighs. He sat the brush down. “Across my lap now, young lady.” Cassie reached back and touched her bottom—it was as hot as it felt. “Hands?” “I—I was just seeing if it was as hot as it felt.” “Are you going to be disrespectful any time soon, Cassandra?” he asked, positioning her back across his lap. “No Sir.” She clasped one hand on the bed covers, and the other again on his leg. The muscles beneath her hand were hard. “Please,” she whispered. “Please what?” he said, starting to spank her with his palm again. Gentle smacks, meant more to sooth than to sting. Now, he’d continue like this until she broke. But even rather light smacks soon had an impact, he knew. “Please stop now.” He ignored the plea. He continued to spank, moving once more to the tender lower bottom area. She was wiggling in earnest now, kicking her legs, but he continued the spanking. 46
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Cassie started to cry. First quiet sobs, then she got louder, pleading with him to stop and to let her up. She didn’t want him to keep spanking her, because she knew she couldn’t stop crying when he was. She wanted him to stop and hold her, tell her that everything would be alright. Brandon finally rested his palm on her bottom, but didn’t rub— not yet. “Are you alright?” he asked. “No!” she all but shrieked. “I want you to stop it now.” He didn’t like her tone. She hadn’t passed the ‘mad’ phase yet. Anger wasn’t the place to stop. Instead, he started to spank again. “Tone, young lady. Watch the tone.” The next several moments were silent, all but the quiet crying and the sound of hand meeting flesh. He spanked, over and over, much gentler than he thought she realized. “Are you angry?” he asked softly, pausing once more to pick up the brush he knew she dreaded again. “Yes!” She let her nails bite into his thigh. See how he liked it, she thought angrily. Brandon felt the bite of her nails and sighed for her benefit. In truth, he was pleased with her feistiness once more. This was no doormat subbie. But she had to really break, or it was all for nothing, he never ended a spanking with the sub angry. He raised the brush high and brought it down twice on her bottom. He saw her fingers clench tightly in the covers. “I said stop!” Cassie sobbed. “I want you to stop now. I’m sorry you’re mad at me, but please, stop” He stopped instantly. He would not let her think he was angry with her. “I’m not angry Cassie. If you need this to end, use your safeword.” Cassie almost said yes. But damn it, part of her still did want him to spank her. She wanted the release he’d promised her. “No,” she said almost inaudibly. “Then trust me, little one,” he said very gently. “Let go. You’re safe with me.” He started spanking her again, although the smacks weren’t at all hard. He’d discarded the brush and was using his hand now. The spanks were steady and moved all over her bottom. Some high, some low, and some on her upper thighs. She’d have to break soon, because damn it, he wanted to hold her. He knew she needed the release, though. He wasn’t sure if she was fighting that on purpose or if she just didn’t know how to let go. “You’re safe with me, sweetheart,” he said softly. 47
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Cassie suddenly stopped kicking her legs and relaxed again, letting herself absorb the sensations. She felt the butterflies again in the pit of her stomach. This was what she’d needed, and she hadn’t even realized it. She’d forgotten that her fingernails were digging in his thigh. She relaxed her grip, but held on to him still. She suddenly realized that he was doing this for her. He wanted her to be open to him, and she realized that she needed to. “I’m sorry if I disappointed you, “she cried. “I didn’t mean to.” She was crying in earnest now, all anger evaporated as if it had never been there. She wasn’t sure how but he’d known she’d needed it. Now, she wanted him to tell her that everything would be ok, and that he forgave her for what she’d said. Brandon smiled now. “You didn’t disappoint me, love. Not at all.” He stopped spanking a moment. “Still feeling guilty?” he asked gently. She nodded her head jerkily against the pillow. “Do you think a few more whacks with the brush would help?” he asked, still in a gentle tone. Surprising herself, she nodded. “Hard ones,” she said with a shiver. He lifted the brush and gave her one swat on each check, then tossed the brush aside, then used his hand, spanking gently now, although on her tender bottom, it was surely stinging quite a bit. Cassie tried to hold still, but couldn’t. “Ouch!” “Still feeling guilty?” he demanded, spanking still. “Ow! I don’t know,” she cried. “I don’t know.” He centered the next series on the tender spot again. “Let me know when you decide, love,” he said gently. “I’m sorry,” she wailed. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it. You can stop now, ok?” Brandon stopped, and once more caressed her bottom gently. “Shhh,” he whispered. “It’s all over now. Still want to learn about D/s?” he asked, caressing her bottom gently, easing the sting. “Y-yes,” she whispered. “Mad?” “No, Sir.” She wasn’t at all mad, actually. He’d gotten past that a while ago. She wasn’t even feeling guilty anymore. “Thank you.” He helped her turn over and sat her on his lap. “You’re welcome, love,” he said gently. 48
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Chapter Five She couldn’t stop crying, so she didn’t try. She wrapped her arms around his neck and clung to him, letting go of all the emotions she’d been holding in for so long she hadn’t even realized she had been doing so. It had felt good to let herself go. He’d given her that. She felt safe and protected, not helpless as she had been as a child. Brandon rocked her back and forth, rubbing one hand up and down her back. When her crying eased, he pulled back a little and looked into her damp expressive eyes. “You’ve needed to do that for a while, haven’t you?” he asked knowingly. He tilted her chin and kissed her lightly, then deepened the kiss, demanding and giving. He groaned aloud when she opened to him and tightened his arms around her, running his tongue over hers. It was a heady kiss. Finally, he lifted his head. “I didn’t know,” she whispered. “I didn’t know. I don’t know why I was angry, though.” “Because I made you express feelings you needed to deal with. Maybe you were angry with yourself. Perhaps it was too much too soon, but I decided to push anyway. That’s one of the jobs of a good Dom, sweetheart.” She looked up at him. “But you like to spank.” He couldn’t deny that. “Yeah, I do. A lot. You’ve got a very spankable bottom,” he said with a wicked grin. When she pouted at him, he chuckled and hugged her tightly. “Don’t pout, little one. You needed that spanking.” “But you didn’t have to enjoy it so much,” she grumbled. He shrugged. “It’s one of the perks, sweetie.” “We should probably talk.” “Later. For now, I’m just going to hold you. Cuddles always come after the spanking.” “Always?” “Oh yes. Always. It’s a rule. A Dom, even after a serious spanking, always comforts the sub.” “But I’m not sure if I’m a sub or not. And I don’t deserve comfort.” He was sure she was a sub, even if she wasn’t. “Yes, love, you deserve comforting. Everyone needs comforting. Why wouldn’t you deserve it?” 49
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“Because if I deserve punished, then I don’t deserve to be comforted afterward.” Brandon hugged her. She was crying quietly now. “That’s not true sweetheart. You were punished, and now it’s over. We can talk about it if you want to, and probably should, but it’s over. Hell, honey, that spanking was as much about showing you a deeper sense of D/s, as much as a punishment. And I wasn’t angry with you. I’m sorry you thought I was. But, often, a sub knows when a Dom is disappointed, and that can be mistaken for anger; as can intensity. A spanking has more than one purpose. A very real one, though, is so the sub can feel she’s atoned for whatever she’s done. It’s not about payback.” He caressed her cheek, rubbing away the tears. “You’ll get to the point where you feel a sense of relief when you’re spanked.” “But I got angry. That was wrong.” “There isn’t a wrong and right, little one. I’d have been surprised if you hadn’t gotten angry. That spanking was more than was really warranted. I wanted you to not be afraid of me, so I decided that a good spanking would let you know that I could give you a very real spanking, and that you were safe in my hands.” “So, you’re not mad?” she asked again. “No, little one. Not at all mad. Remember what I said? I never spank when I’m angry.” There was much they needed to talk about. “And, just so you know, I’ll never spank you for voicing your real opinions and thoughts.” He hugged her, rocking her gently. “Do you understand?” “I think so.” “I’m glad. Now, have you eaten?” She thought about it. “No, come to think of it. I got on the Internet as soon as I got home from work.” “Hungry?” “Are you?” she asked. “Yup. Giving a good spanking takes a lot of energy.” He patted her bottom. “Do you need a pillow to sit on?” She flushed. “You’re teasing me.” “A little maybe.” “That’s not nice.” She pouted again. He flicked her bottom lip. “You’re cute when you pout.” “I never pout.” “It’s the brat in you, hon. I doubt she’s ever been out before.” He kissed her pouting lips and grinned. 50
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“So, what do we do about food?” “You have a fridge, right?” he asked. “Of course. I’m just not entirely sure there is anything to eat in it.” He frowned a little. “And you haven’t eaten today at all?” “I don’t think so,” she admitted. “It was a pretty busy morning.” “Ok, we need a few ground rules here.” Now that she’d stopped crying, he sat her on the bed next to him. “First, you are to eat every day, I’m a cop, too, so I know you have time to take a lunch break.” She was already tiny, and couldn’t afford to loose an ounce.. Cassie pouted. “I don’t always find time to eat.” Brandon gave her a stern look. “You will find time, Cassandra.” She looked at him, swallowed the lump in her throat. “Yes, Sir.” At least she’d let him think so! He grinned. “Good girl.” She looked so disgruntled; he just had to chuckle. There was a pout on her pretty lips. He was a sucker for a pout. He pulled her close and kissed the tip of her nose. “So, now, on to the next area. Hmm, let me think a moment. We should discuss a list of rules, and the possible punishments associated with them,” he decided. If possible, her pout was larger. “I don’t like rules,” she muttered, not caring that she sounded like a five-year-old at the moment. He had to work to keep the stern demeanor, when all he really wanted to do at this moment was lay her down and make love to her. But, this was first. “On to swearing,” he decided promptly. “What do you think is a reasonable punishment for swearing?” That was a toughie. She swore a lot. The words just seemed to roll off her tongue. “Um…how about we don’t have a rule on that?” she suggested hopefully. “Oh, no, little one. Swearing around me definitely deserves some kind of punishment. We could always substitute washing your mouth out with soap for writing lines, though…’ he said thoughtfully, pretending to ponder the possibility. “Oh no we couldn’t!” she said quickly. He chuckled richly. “No? Well, then, we will stick with the minimum of twenty-five lines and a small spanking. It’s one of the few rules that are more because it’s what I want, then what you 51
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necessarily need. I really just don’t like it. But you don’t have to worry about it too much, because it wouldn’t be a spanking like you just got. I really do mean just a small one.” She muttered beneath her breath, but nodded stiffly. It sometimes still amazed him just how quickly a woman could turn into a subbie. Cassie was a natural. “You’re so cute when you pout,” he teased again. She glared at him. “I don’t pout,” she retorted, totally unaware that she was, indeed, pouting. She crossed her arms over her chest and sighed. Brandon stood up and walked over to her very feminine dresser. He found a hand mirror there, and brought it back to the bed. “Look, then tell me you don’t pout.” Cassie looked at herself in the mirror, but shook her head. “That’s not a pout. It’s mutiny!” He laughed, a full, rich sound that had her heart racing again. “Should we talk about fibbing?” “Are you going to let me get away with anything?” she asked, curious. “Probably. Eventually. Not yet, though. So, on to lying.” He paused to take the mirror away, and tilted up her chin. “I’m very serious here, Cassandra. I won’t be lied to. And I’m not talking about right now, when you’re being a cute brat. I mean in real issues, or when I ask you a direct question. You are not to lie to me.” “I don’t generally lie, Brandon,” she said seriously. He would have guessed that. Still, he wanted it clarified. “Not even to save yourself a punishment, Cassie.” “And if I do?” she asked. She suddenly realized that she did want a complete list of taboos and punishments she could expect. She was keeping mental notes. “Depends on the lie—and that includes lies of omission. Considering what we do for a living, if it were something that I consider a serious lie or omission, what we just finished here would seem like child’s play. Which means that I want kept fully informed, within reasonable limits, what you are working on and how you plan to proceed. Remember, I’ve been a cop even longer than you have. Of course you will follow orders at work, but if I find out you’ve taken unnecessary risks with yourself, there will be hell to pay.” He was deadly serious about this, and she needed to know that. “I can’t always discuss my cases, Brandon.” 52
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He shook his head impatiently. “I know that, Cassie. But I think you know what I’m talking about. You impress me as the type that would go in guns blazing, so to speak, and to hell with the consequences.” She shrugged. That did tend to be her style, she admitted to herself. “So?” “So, now you have to think first, about whether or not what you are planning is justified, or something that you need to think through.” “I don’t know about that.” “Let’s take whatever you’re working on now, Cassie. Tell me why you found that chat room earlier today. Or was it really just simple curiosity?” She sighed. “It’s a case where we are trying to find a sadistic bastard. I’m bait.” His frown deepened at that. “This is an order?” He found it hard to believe that any competent supervisor would let a lone female officer use herself as bait from her own home. It was just plain foolish. It was way too easy in this day and age to track people through their ISP. “Well, no. I just sort of planned to go check out some of the rooms and see if anyone looked suspicious,” she admitted. He didn’t look at all pleased! “I want to catch him, and I have more time here at home than some of the other officers.” “So, let me see if I understand this. I could have been some cyber-stalker with sadistic tendencies, and you still invited me into your home?” he asked darkly. Ok, so she had pissed him off sooner than he’d thought she would. He seriously debated another spanking; even though he’d never have met her if she hadn’t gotten on the net this morning. “No,” she said quickly. “I’d signed on to do some research, but you were different. I only wondered for a moment if you were the guy I was looking for, when you asked to meet me so quickly. You weren’t part of the job, though. The more I talked to you, the more I wanted to meet you.” Brandon decided to accept that. “It won’t happen again. If I ever hear that you’ve given your real personal information to anyone in the Internet, I can’t begin to express how much trouble you will be in.” “But it’s ok for you to?” He shrugged and grinned. “That about sums it up.” 53
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“Then how am I supposed to catch this guy?” she demanded hotly. “With good police work. I have some connections on your department; we can get a joint investigation going. There are safer ways of drawing this guy out, and you know it. There is no reason to use your own computer and ISP. You should have at least requested use of the departmental ISP!” “Fine, we can discuss it, I guess.” “We will discuss it,” he corrected. “I couldn’t be happier that you invited me over today, but I’m the last one that will be invited to your door.” She nodded. Bossy was an understatement. “I won’t give out my real information. But remember, I signed on as Brandy.” “With an ISP that anyone could easily trace. Using your own ISP for undercover work is just not good police form. And, even more, you know it.” Hell, she did know it. The department had accounts set up for just this kind of sting—ever since the Internet had begun to play such a huge role in sexual crimes. “Yes, Sir.” He smiled now. “You’re lucky I’m happy enough that I met you that I didn’t decide to apply a little reminder,” he said. She smiled now. “I don’t know. Maybe I need a reminder. What form would it take?” He flipped her over his lap so quickly that she didn’t even have time to take a breath first. His hand came down in a series of sharp smacks, and on her already tender bottom, they stung like hell. She sucked in her breath in a sharp hiss. “Ouch!” “This is how it would start,” he offered between smacks. “And, in an hour or two, we’d get around to the hairbrush.” “Ok, ok, it was just a question!” she said quickly. Brandon flipped her back over and sat her on his lap. “That hurt, ya know,” she pouted. “Good,” he said, without sympathy. “It was supposed to.” “I think you do have a mean streak, Brandon.” He tilted up her chin again. “I can be a total son of a bitch with the right provocation, Cassie. I’ve told you—I do like to spank. But, under the right circumstances, you really wouldn’t sit comfortably for a while. Defy me on this topic, and, I warn you now, you would spend an hour of every night for at least a week getting a very real spanking.” “Somehow, I think you’d enjoy that,” she muttered, rubbing her tender bottom 54
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He grabbed her rubbing hand. “No rubbing. That’s another rule I might have forgotten to mention.” “Now, as I was saying, yes, I enjoy spanking, and in many forms that we haven’t explored fully. But when it comes to your safety and well-being, I would be a total SOB. And, for the record, you would not enjoy it, nor, would I. I’ll never enjoy causing you real pain.” She looked at him seriously. “Really? But, don’t you spank because you do enjoy it?” She was confused now. This was going to be a tough one to explain. He sighed, deciding to give it his best shot. “Yes, I do spank because I enjoy it. But, I spank because my sub enjoys it, too. I choose it as a means of discipline because I never want my woman to feel she’s being abused or mistreated. But, when it comes to delivering the kind of spanking that it would take to bring this point home, it can’t even remotely resemble fun. It would scare you, and I don’t want to scare you. But I care enough that I’d do it. Remember, I told you, I can be a real SOB No amount of tears or pleading would stop me until I was ready to stop. You need to understand that, Cassandra.”
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Chapter Six “So, you’d beat me?” she whispered. He looked at her and shook his head. “I told you, I’d never seriously hurt you. But I’d give you the spanking of your life— one that you’d be ready to end long before I was. And, don’t ask for a sample, because I won’t give you one. You’ll just have to trust me that you don’t want to go there.” She believed him. “Ok.” “Not good enough. I want your word that if you ever risk yourself, that you will accept whatever punishment I decide to administer, and that you understand that when it’s over, it’s over.” “What does that mean?” “I don’t hold grudges, and I don’t want you to, either. Believe me; sooner or later, you’ll earn yourself a spanking that you aren’t going to enjoy a whole lot. I expect you’ll be angry, and resentful, but when it’s over, it’s over. So, I wouldn’t be too pleased if you spent the next week or two being pissed off.” “I can’t promise I wouldn’t be angry.” “I understand that. You would be angry. But, we’d discuss exactly why I was doing it. I just don’t want you to stay angry, or be afraid. An important part of D/s is trust. You’ve got to trust me not to seriously hurt you, and to always keep your best interests to heart. If you really felt you did something that was justified, of course, I wouldn’t spank you for it—even if I didn’t like what you’d done. There will probably come a time when you do something that as your Dom I don’t like, but as a fellow cop, I’ll understand. And, since I would be angry, you’d have plenty of time to justify it if it was justifiable. I’m not normally unreasonable, but I’ve never had a sub that was a cop, and that’s going to change the rules. There are things that I’d never let a sub who wasn’t a cop get away with, but I’ll have to let you, and I’m not going to like it.” “I do trust you, Brandon,” she said, surprising herself. He smiled at her. “Well, I hope so.” “So, what kind of spanking are you talking about?” she only paused a moment before adding quickly “and that wasn’t a request for a sample!” He could see that she was nervous. It wasn’t unexpected. “The spanking you just got a while ago is pretty typical of what you’ll likely ever get, Cassie. The point is to let you cry, let me 56
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make the point that you’ve done something you shouldn’t have, and to make sure you’re not left feeling guilty.” He decided to get out his punishment only toy, though, and to show it to her. “Wait here. I’m going to get something out of the car. I’ll be right back.” “But, I was crying a while before you stopped.” “Yes, but you were still feeling guilty and were angry. You don’t get the release you deserve if you’re pissed off or feeling guilty. I have to spank past all that.” He watched her intently, trying to read if she understood. She seemed to be considering what he said, then her eyes cleared and she nodded. “Ok,” she whispered. He lifted her off his lap and sat her on the edge of the bed. “I’ll be right back. And, don’t dress while I’m gone, little one. I’m enjoying the view,” he teased. “You do know I might be getting cold,” she muttered. He grinned wickedly. “Want me to warm you up first?” She knew what that meant, and grinned herself. “Yes, I think I do.” He touched her cheek softly. “Aren’t you tender?” She shrugged. “Not so much.” “Sure?” “I’m sure. I—I like being spanked.” Brandon grinned. “Then come on back over my lap, sweetheart.” She rolled over across his lap again, and moaned when his hand caressed her bottom gently. “I like that.” He smiled. He did, too. “Lady’s choice. Hard or soft?” She wiggled experimentally. “Yes,” she decided. Oh, she was such a delight. He regretted that he’d likely eventually give her a very different kind of spanking at some point. He just hoped that by the time that spanking came due, she’d fully trust him. “Just tell me when you want me to stop. When a play spanking isn’t fun anymore, I stop when you want to stop. It’s for your enjoyment this time, so you get to tell me what you want.” “Ok.” She smiled at him. “I think I’ll like this.” “You will,” he promised. He loved her bottom, it was taut and soft at the same time, and just now, pinkened from the spanking he’d given her earlier. He continued to rub and caress, then gave her a little pinch that had her wiggling around again. “I love your bottom.” 57
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“Mmm,” she murmured. “Good.” Because she loved his hands on it. She turned her head so she could look at him. “Are you going to make love to me?” He smiled. He hadn’t thought that they would end up making love yet, and part of him wondered if cementing the D/s first would be better, but then he realized that making love would cement it a lot quicker. “If you’d like me to.” She was a gift from heaven. She was perfect for him. “Gladly. Thank God you found your way onto the Internet this morning.” “Spank first, though, ok?” She’d have never thought that spanking could be both erotic and so much more. But she wanted to see, wanted to feel and experience everything with him, and all at once. “So, you think you want an erotic spanking?” “Oh, yes.” “Alright.” He raised his hand and lowered it gently in a soft spank. “Like this?” He delivered a second, spanking gently again. The aim here wasn’t discomfort at all, but arousal. Still, arousal could include a little pain, too, but he’d wait to see what she wanted from this encounter. He continued to spank, gentle smacks. Cassie loved it. His hard hands could deliver pleasure or pain, but now, there was only pleasure. She felt the heat building inside her. “More,” she demanded. “Spread your legs a little bit for me, little one,” he murmured. “Just a little.” She did immediately. What was he going to do now? “What…?” “Shhh, just feel,” he ordered softly. “Just something a little different.” He spanked a little, then caressed, too. “Just feel,” he repeated his voice soft. “Lift up a little,” he murmured. When she had, he lowered her thongs down slowly, and used his hand to smooth them down and off. He kept one hand at the small of her back, smoothing it up and down. The other continued to spank gently. He had a velvet flogger in his toy bag, he wished he’d gone to the car first, now. She’d enjoy it. Now, he moved his hands to her thighs, gently running them from the edge of her bottom to her knees, then back up again, where he spanked again, a tad harder than before. “Ok?” “Oh yes,” she whispered. “More than ok.” He smiled. He turned her over in his lap and sat her up. “I want to get something from the car. Wait for me.” 58
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She looked at him intently. “Will I like it?” “We both will, little one,” he promised. “Just lie back down and wait for me.” “Ok,” she murmured. Brandon, with one last look, left the room and went to his car for his toy bag. It held many toys, some she’d like instantly, and some she’d likely learn to like, and a few that she’d absolutely hate. He took it back into the house and went back into her room. “Miss me?” She turned her head and nodded. “What’s in the bag?” “Lots of toys,” he said. “Want to see?” She rolled over to her stomach and sat up, pulling a sheet over her waist. “Uh huh.” Brandon sat the bag on the bed next to her. “Have a look, then.” She looked at him and opened the bag. First, she pulled out a wooden brush that was very similar to the one she had. She sat it on the bed. Next, she pulled out a leather paddle, it was furry on one side, though. She peered in again and pulled out a short flogger, but when she looked at it closely, it was made of velvet, not leather. She smiled at that one. Next, was a pair of handcuffs—fur lined. She grinned and gave him a pointed look. “Sometime a little bondage play is fun,” he said with a grin. She only nodded and continued her search of the bags contents. The next item made her shiver. It had a wooden handle, but didn’t look like any paddle she’d ever envisioned. It was made of some sort of supple thin rubbery material, glued in several layers, but not stiff. It was about a foot long, handle included, and about three inches wide. She looked at him. He took it from her fingers. “Ah, there it is.” “What is that?” she asked warily. He smiled. “A paddle I designed. All surface sting.” “Um, I don’t think I wanna play with that!” “It’s not for play. I only use this one for true punishments for something very serious. And usually only on covered bottoms. Remember, I don’t like to leave anything but a pink bottom when I’m done. But, still, it stings like hell, and I didn’t design it to be used for fun.” “Good!” She didn’t plan on ever having that used on her! He sat it down and picked up the velvet flogger. “This one, though, you’ll like.” 59
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She felt the soft tassels on the end. “I think you might be right,” she said with a grin. “It doesn’t hurt, right?” He shook his head. “Nope, not at all.” “Are you going to make love to me now?” “When you’re ready,” he promised. He sat down and flipped her over his lap again, but he sat back more on the bed, so her thighs and body were supported fully. “First, a little play, though.” She wiggled a little bit. “So, what are you waiting for?” Brandon started spanking her again, light spanks, moving slowly from the top of her bottom to the sensitive ‘sit’ spot. “Like this?” he asked. “Uh huh,” she said. “Like that.” He grinned and gave her a few slightly harder smacks. “How bout this?” “That’s ok, too,” she said, relaxing and enjoying the experience. Brandon paused every few moments to caress her bottom. He finally eased his fingers between her legs and felt her heat build. When she wiggled and tried to close her legs, he stopped. “What’s wrong?” “I—I don’t know.” He gave her a sharp smack. “No lies. Tell me.” “It’s just strange,” she admitted. “It’s loving, just relax and enjoy it.” He caressed her again, gently easing her legs apart slightly. “Just feel.” But she was nervous now, he could sense it. He turned her over again in his lap. “Change your mind? We don’t have to make love until you’re sure you’re ready.” He’d pushed her a lot today, and didn’t want to push her into this. “No,” she said. “I don’t want you to stop.” He laid her gently on the bed, and then looked down at her. He sat next to her, brushing his fingers on her cheek, then moving it down to her neck. He could feel her pulse racing. His fingers trailed down to her bra, where he gently cupped her breasts, then kneaded them gently. “Do you like this?” he whispered. He lowered his head and kissed her again, light teasing kisses, designed to increase her desire. She nodded, her throat too dry to answer when he lifted his head. His fingers moved to the front closure of her bra, and in an instant, her breasts were freed. 60
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Brandon sucked in his breath. Her breasts were exquisite. Firm and not as small as he’d have expected when she was so tiny. He smiled then, cupping them both in his palms. “Beautiful.” “I’m not,” she said self-consciously. “But I’m glad you think so.” Brandon paused, his hands still on her breasts. “You don’t think so?” he asked. “Why?” She shrugged. No man had ever called her beautiful, and certainly not her breasts. Though she’d heard more than her fair share of lewd comments. They were way too large for her small frame. “I’m just not.” He shook his head. “Did someone tell you that?” She shrugged. “No.” “Cassie, you’re beautiful. Absolutely beautiful, both inside and out.” He stood up and held out his hand. “Come with me,” he said softly. Someone had certainly done a number on her selfesteem and if he accomplished nothing else, he was going to show her how desirable she was. Cassie looked at him, then put her hand in his. He led her to the mirror, and then stood behind her, his hands cupped her breasts from behind. “Look at what I see,” he whispered. Cassie looked at herself in the mirror, trying to see what he saw. She saw large tanned hands cupping pale white flesh. His fingers were moving, gently pinching her nipples, making her groan. Her breasts had always been sensitive. She leaned back against his strong chest and closed her eyes. “No little one. Watch us. Watch me loving you,” he ordered. Her eyes opened again, and she watched, transfixed as his hands moved from her breasts and down her sides. He raised one hand and moved the hair aside, then lowered his head and kissed the spot on her throat where her pulse raced. He nipped gently on her earlobe. Once more, her head fell back, and her eyes closed. “Keep them open,” he ordered. “I mean it.” “Why?” He lifted his head and smiled in the mirror. “Because I told you to.” “Dom mode again?” she asked with a small grin. He shrugged, and reached down to cup her bottom in both hands. “If necessary. You don’t have to say Sir this time.” He continued to caress her bottom now, but kept his eyes on hers in the mirror. “Just watch me loving you.” 61
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It was strange being naked with him standing behind her fully dressed. She raised her hands and covered her breasts by crossing her arms over them, suddenly self-conscious. Brandon gave her a smart smack on her left bottom cheek. “Don’t. Just watch,” he repeated. His hands started to move again, reaching up to cover her breasts, then down again to her sides, soft, gentle caresses, meant to tease and arouse. “Tell me what you see,” he said. She met his eyes with her own. His were darkened with desire, his face intent. Those eyes bespoke a desire that she knew was mirrored in her own. “Desire.” “What else?” he asked, his hands moved up again to cup her breasts, gently kneading. “Me,” she said. It was hard to talk. His fingers were gentle one second, almost rough the next. He was building sensations that she didn’t remember ever feeling before. “Touch me,” she whispered. He smiled now, gently. “I am touching you. Where do you want me to touch?” He ran his hands down her smooth stomach, resting it on the mound of red curls at the juncture of her thighs. He edged two fingers gently between her thighs. “Here?” She nodded, unable to speak. Her own eyes, she noticed, darkened. She moaned. “There,” she finally got out. He nodded. “Open your legs a little, love,” he said. She hesitated a moment, then opened her legs, just a little. His hand moved lower now, his fingers found her clitoris and he rubbed it gently. “Like this/” His fingers were magic. He knew exactly how hard to touch, exactly where to touch. “Yes,” she said on a moan. She wanted to close her eyes, but he didn’t want her to. He wanted her to keep them open. She watched his fingers and she arched her hips, seeking more. “That’s it. Watch and feel. See what I see.” He moved his fingers faster now, and then inserted two fingers deep inside her, never taking his eyes off hers in the mirror. He moved his fingers in a slow rhythm. In and out. His thumb rubbed ever so gently on her clitoris. Her eyes were locked on his, her hips moving back and forth as she felt him moving his fingers inside her. She whimpered, wanting more.
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Brandon moved against her again, rubbing against her now, holding her back against him with his hand across her waist. “Feel that?” he demanded. She nodded, and ground her hips against him. “I feel it. Stop teasing me.” He reached around her and moved the items on the top of the dresser out of the way, then urged her to bend over it. “Keep watching,” he whispered. Cassie braced herself with her hands on the edge of the dresser, but as he’d asked, kept her eyes on him. His eyes were, if possible, even darker. When he rubbed against her, she moaned again. She wanted him to take her, just like this. “Now!” she ordered. Brandon backed away slightly, but put a firm hand between her shoulder blades to keep her in the position he wanted her in. He moved slightly to the side, but kept his eyes on hers in the mirror. “No, not yet.” He raised his hand and gave her bottom a light smack. “Tell me if you like this.” He started spanking her again, keeping his eyes on her face as he did. “Lean down, rest on your forearms,” he said thickly. When she did as he asked, he moved his hand from her back, and reached from behind and found her again, driving hard fingers in and out, fast, then slow. “Like this?” “Y—yes,” she whispered. “Please.” He continued to drive his fingers deep, brushing his thumb gently, then harder, over her clitoris. Once more, her hips started to move. She lowered her head and got a sharp smack for reward. “Watch,” he said gently. She lifted her head again. “I see. Please, come inside me.” He removed his fingers and stood behind her. He moved against her hard. “Does this feel like I don’t find you attractive?” he asked, knowing full well she could feel his erection rubbing against her bottom. “No,” she whispered. “You want me.” “I want you,” he agreed. He unbuttoned his jeans and stepped out of them, and his boxers. His shirt was removed just as quickly. He braced his hands on her hips and pulled her back onto his shaft, driving deep and hard. He held her with one hand and reached around her with the other, rubbing her clitoris again, bringing her to the edge of orgasm, then slowing and bringing her back down again. 63
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Her hips moved frantically now, but at this angle, she couldn’t change the angle of the thrusts at all. He had set the pace, and he wasn’t letting her change it. He brought her to the edge over and over, but then slowed, holding off her climax. He held a tight reign on his own desire. This was just for her, this first time. He wanted to make her feel things she’d never felt before. Things that only he could give to her. He plunged deep, slamming into her, then again, lightly. “Watch us,” he said huskily. “Watch me loving you.” He longed to lay her on the bed and take her hard and fast. But, not yet. “Tell me what you see.” She glanced up. “Us.” “What else?” “You loving me. You make me feel beautiful.” Brandon eased out of her and turned her around. He lowered his head and kissed her; first her cheeks, then her mouth. God, he loved her mouth. She kissed him back with everything she had. He nipped her lip and then sucked the little hurt. “God, you’re sexy as all hell,” he growled low. “Only with you,” she said honestly. Only with you.” Brandon lifted her in his arms easily and carried her over to the bed. He laid her down. He took of his shirt. “Now what?” she asked him. She was a bundle of nerves. She wanted to feel everything that he could show her. It was amazingly erotic to watch them both as he’d made love to her. What would be next? Brandon picked up the velvet flogger, flicked it over her breasts, and then squeezed them gently with his hand. She had sensitive breasts. He was almost sure that he could bring her to climax with nothing more than his hands and mouth on them. Cassie watched him, her face was flushed, she knew. She lowered her eyes slowly. He was definitely aroused still. His chest was covered in a mat of dark hair. Funny how she’d never thought she liked men with hairy chests. But she liked his. His legs were muscled and long, and tanned. His body was fantastic and she was a little in awe that he’d want her. “Like what you see?” he asked, his voice laced with humor. He sat next to her. She raised her eyes and looked at his face. “Yes,” she said simply. He grinned. “Good, I like what I see, too.” He trailed the velvet flogger from her neck to the juncture of her thighs. “Open for me, little one,” he murmured. 64
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She didn’t think of not obeying. She wanted to feel everything, do everything. Brandon sat up next to her now, using the flogger to tease and torment her, letting it trail across her inner thighs. He smiled when she shuddered. “Close your eyes, now,” he said softly. She gave him a puzzled look. For the last ten minutes, he’d been insisting she keep them open. Brandon saw the question in her eyes, but shook his head. “Just trust me. Close those pretty eyes.” When she’d complied, he continued to talk softly. “There are many senses. When one is lost, others are enhanced,” he explained. “If you don’t see, every other sense is heightened.” He used the flogger still, running it all across her body, light teasing flicks. He lowered his head and drew her nipple deeply into the hot suction of his mouth, suckling hard. Lord, but he’d wanted to taste her. He sat down the flogger and used one hand on her breast, and held the other breast to suckle. Cassie moaned and arched against the sensations rioting through her. No one had ever loved her like this before. He lifted his head and looked at her flushed face a moment. Her eyes were still closed, her hands clenched at her sides. He lowered his head to the other breast, nipping first, then soothing the sting with the flick of his tongue. Cassie groaned and reached out blindly to hold him against her. Her fingers clenched in his hair as she held him to her. She cried out when he suckled harder, and held him closer. Brandon released the breast he’d been holding and moved his hand to the juncture of her thighs. He moved her legs apart further and drove two fingers inside her, while teasing the sensitive nubbin with his thumb with a light circling motion. “Come inside me now,” she said, “please.” Brandon smiled. “There are still things I want to show you, Cassie. Just relax and feel.” He moved his fingers deeper, hard thrusts, once more bringing her to the edge, then eased, pulling her back. Now, she was getting frustrated. “Damn it, stop teasing me.” Brandon withdrew his fingers and waited for her eyes to open. He didn’t have to wait long, they opened with fire in their depths. “What did you just say?” “I’m not in the mood for more games,” she muttered, frustrated. 65
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“Why are you angry?” “You’re trying to drive me insane!” She slugged him on the shoulder. He grinned. “No, I’m making love to you. Did you expect a quickie?” “Well, no,” she muttered. He smoothed his hand down her red hair. “You sure came by this honestly, huh?” he teased, tugging gently. “Why won’t you just, well, finish it?” Sexual frustration wasn’t something she was used to, and she didn’t know how to respond to it. “Quickie it is, then.” He climbed over her, his face taut. “I’m sorry.” He eased inside her gently, but deeply. He felt her heat envelop him and groaned. “Shhh, nothing to be sorry for. We’ll talk in a bit.” He started to move, long, smooth strokes. He kept his weight braced on his arms so he could look at her. He read frustration and desire and something more. What was it, though? He gave her a deep thrust, then pulled back and plunged again. Let’s see if she really does just want a quickie. His thrusts were deep and hard, but he never took his eyes off her face. Cassie looked up at him. He looked angry now. She didn’t want him to be angry with her. “What’s wrong?” “I said we’ll talk later, Cassandra.” He paused. He gave her a deep, hard thrust. “Is this what you want?” She arched into each thrust. “Yes.” He nodded. “Then hush and just feel.” He slowed his pace, to prolong the pleasure, but each thrust was long and deep, reaching to the very core of her. He felt her muscles clench around him and groaned. He lowered his head and kissed her again, demanding that she give him everything, the kiss was hot and hard and with his tongue, he mimicked the movements of his body. Cassie wrapped her legs around his lean hips, feeling the damp flesh as she clung to him with both arms and legs. But something was wrong—somehow he seemed detached from her. Brandon eased back on his heels, pulling her toward him. He raised her legs high and drove deep, controlling both the depth and force of each thrust. Faster, harder, hotter. He took everything, but gave as much as himself. When he felt himself nearing his own release, he paused a moment, breathing hard. He pulled out and flipped her over, 66
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positioning her up on her knees. He knelt behind her, and drove inside her again, hard. He held her hips tightly and let go, driving hard and deep, until he felt his release building again. But, it suddenly dawned on him that she wasn’t with him, not yet. She was excited, but she wasn’t ready for release yet. He pulled out and quickly laid her over his lap. He spanked her gently, but used one hand to drive his fingers into the heat, thrusting hard. Cassie could do no more than feel. He was driving her mad, and she wanted to let him. She tried to arch against his hand, but couldn’t seem to move. After a few moments, she felt his hands moving her. “You’re coming with me,” he promised. He rolled her back over, positioning her on her forearms and knees. “Move with me,” he ordered huskily. With one hand free, he smacked her taut bottom, each smack a little harder than the one before, all the while, thrusting hard, but she was meeting each thrust, moaning with each slap on her ass. When he felt her start to clench around him again, he stopped the slaps and held her hips hard in his hands and drove them both to release, shuddering when he felt her melt around him. When he could breathe again, he eased back onto his heels, and pulled her back with him, not coming out of her. He was still deep inside, and could feel the aftershocks of her release as he held her to him. He captured each breast in his hands and massaged them, gently pinched the nipples. He lowered his head and nipped the tendon at the side of her neck. Then, he lifted his head. “Are you ok?” he asked. She leaned her head back, still shivering from the force of her release. “Still mad at me?” she asked. He chuckled against her throat, his breath warm. “No, not mad.” “Disappointed, then?” she asked, suddenly feeling vulnerable again. He’d made her feel things she’d never felt before. But she sensed that he wasn’t feeling the same. She’d done something wrong. He eased her away and moved so he was in front of her. He leaned back on the pillows and held out his hand. “C’mere” he whispered. She started to cry and crawled up to lay with him. His hand was gentle in her hair as he held her close. “I didn’t mean to ruin it for you,” she whispered. 67
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“Hush, and just listen.” He tugged on her hair till she lifted her head. “You didn’t do anything wrong. I loved what we just shared. I’ve loved everything we shared. I just wanted to give you more, love.” “Any more and you would have killed me!” He chuckled, his breath warm against her neck. “So, no complaints?” “No.” He tapped her bottom lightly. “Good, now, up woman, and feed me.”
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Chapter Seven She grinned at him. “How bout you feed me?” He snagged her over his lap and gave her a playful slap on the bottom. “You are supposed to feed me, wench. I’ve worked hard today.” “It’s not fair that you can just do that, you know!” she grumbled. Brandon flipped her over and pulled her against him. “Fair is irrelevant. I’m stronger.” Cassie frowned. Then quickly grinned. She grabbed his thumb and twisted it back, in a maneuver she’d learned in the Academy. “Ouch, damn it!” He yanked his thumb free and frowned. “That hurt!” Cassie grinned wider. “Uh huh. You may be stronger, but I’m not without defenses,” she purred. Brandon returned her grin. “True, but I’m not without my own little tricks.” To prove it, he flipped her across his lap again, but he didn’t spank her. Instead, he rubbed her bottom. It was a caress pure and simple. He moved his fingers lower and eased them into her again. He moved them back and forth gently. He was grinning when she almost immediately started to move against his fingers. He knew exactly how to turn her on now. He eased his fingers in, then out, slowly, then deeply and hard. When her legs fell open wide, he grinned. He teased her for a few more minutes, forgetting that this was just supposed to be a little payback. He concentrated on arousing her again, and moved his thumb up to her clitoris again, teasing it gently. Cassie moaned. She loved his hands on her, and in her. She arched against his fingers, trying to get more. Cassie reached between their bodies and caressed him, running her hand slowly across his length, stopping and circling the tip, then back down again. When he groaned and lengthened in her hand, she smiled. She could give as good as she got. Brandon wasn’t stupid enough to stop her. He loved the feel of her small fingers closing around him. When she cupped him, he groaned again, and drove his fingers deeply. All thoughts of food were forgotten. Within a few moments, she was writhing again, as if he hadn’t made love to her only a few minutes before. He moved her fingers off of him. “Give me a minute, I don’t want 69
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this to end too soon.” But, she deserved perhaps just a little spanking for that thumb twist, he decided. He withdrew his fingers and rested his hand on her bottom, rubbing back and forth. “I think maybe a little spanking,“ he said with a grin. Cassie giggled. “Well, if you insist.” He grinned. “I do indeed.” He started spanking her again, but lightly. He really couldn’t get enough of her cute ass. He wasn’t spanking hard, though. This was purely to arouse her. He remembered the fur-covered paddle and grinned to himself. He reached across the bed and picked it up. One side was leather, and the other fur-covered. But for this, definitely fur was called for. He rubbed the fur over her bottom. “Like this?” he asked huskily. She purred. “Uh huh.” She’d forgotten all about teasing him. She just focused on feeling. She wasn’t sure what to expect, but she trusted him. “Gonna spank me again?” she asked. “I’m debating,” he said. He continued to rub the paddle across her bottom. After a moment, he lifted it and gave her a swat with it. He knew it didn’t hurt at all. “Still want more?” he asked huskily. She wiggled against his thighs. “Maybe,” she teased. He laughed and started to caress her with the paddle again. “Maybe, hmm?” He gave her several more smacks with it, loving it when she moved against him. “Now, tell me what you want,” he demanded. She reached her hand down to his leg, trailing her nails along his thigh. “You’re doing just fine so far,” she said. Brandon picked up the velvet flogger again, trailing it down her smooth back, teasing gently. “And this?” Cassie shivered. She loved the sensation. “I like it.” Brandon used the velvet flogger now on her bottom, trailing it across her bottom, then lashing her with it. When her bottom lifted, he smiled. Did she have any idea how sexy she really was? He continued, lashing her with the flogger, enjoying her reactions. “Want to try something a little different?” Cassie turned her head and looked at him. “Like what?” Everything for the last few hours or so had been different! What else did he have up his sleeve? She grinned to herself as she watched him. Well, sleeve was obviously figurative. She waited to see what he waned to do now. She didn’t know if there was anything that she’d refuse this man. He’d turned on things in her that she hadn’t even known she could feel. 70
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Brandon continued to flog her with the velvet. “Hmmm, I was thinking I’d just give you a spanking, have hot, torrid sex, and then eat dinner.” His moved one hand on her bottom now. “But, I’m open to suggestions.” Her stomach lurched at his words. That other spanking he’d given her hadn’t exactly been fun. But still…”Ok.” Brandon smiled. “You’re easy,” he teased. “I’m at your mercy,” she said in a deceptively submissive tone. “Do what you will.” “Oh, that is a very dangerous thing to say to a Dom, little one.” But, boy did it give him ideas. He still couldn’t believe how open she was, and how giving. There was so much he wanted to explore with her. She shivered. He had no idea how dangerous he was for her. He could easily make her totally re-evaluate everything she’d ever thought about herself. “Ok little girl, Go to your corner, please.” She gave him an incredulous look. She hated that damn corner. Tomorrow, she was going to go to the store and buy planted fake trees and put them in every corner of her house. “Do I have to?” She was pouting again, he loved her pout. Then, he remembered one of his own rules. Some things were reserved for a punishment—corner time wasn’t for fun and games. And this definitely fell into the latter category. “No, you don’t have to,” he said. “Although, I do love watching you standing there,” he admitted, more to himself than to her. “Ok.” She climbed off the bed and walked over to the corner, swaying her hips as she walked. Something told her she wouldn’t be there for long. She stood still, waiting. Brandon was frowning. Now that she was there, he had to think of what to do with her there. He walked over to her quickly, standing so close that their bodies were touching. “Want some company?” he murmured, rubbing against her bottom and wrapping his hands around her, so he could caress her breasts. Cassie smiled, arching her back against him more fully. “Yes, please. I was getting lonely.” “I can’t keep my hands off you,” he admitted. He turned her around and pulled her close, then lowered his head and kissed her deeply. “Not nearly enough.” She was breathing hard when the kiss ended. She looked up at him, realizing that she had a power of her own. “Good.” 71
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Despite his desire, he chuckled. His hands found her breasts again, teasing the erect nipples. “You are a minx,” he murmured. “Is that a good thing?” she asked breathlessly. “Oh yes,” he replied. “It’s a very good thing.” He moved quickly and lifted her into his arms, then carried her back over to the bed. “A very good thing,” he repeated as he stood her next to the bed. He sat down on the edge of the bed and patted his lap. “Come here,” he whispered. She looked at him, considering. “On or over?” He grinned. “Your preference.” She giggled and nearly flopped over his lap, making herself comfortable, wiggling more than necessary as she adjusted her position. She felt him growing against her belly and grinned to herself. Brandon looked down at the pert bottom presented to him with delight. “Lord, you are something else,” he whispered. He rested his palm on her bottom. “I love your bottom,” he murmured. “You like spanking it,” she corrected, wiggling just a little bit. “Oh yes, I do. But I like just touching it, too. It’s a perfect bottom, you know. Round and soft.” He ran one finger down the cleft, then found the sensitive core of her and teased the outer edges with gentle fingers. She shivered involuntarily. She thought she should probably be embarrassed to be exposed to him like this, and part of her was—but it was erotic, too. His fingers worked magic. “Mmm.” Brandon moved one finger into her heat, moving it back and forth for a moment. “You like this?” he asked, although he could tell by her reaction that she did. “Yes.” The word was breathless. He lifted his other hand and started to spank her, light teasing smacks, all the while, moving his fingers inside her. He felt her muscles clench around his fingers as he started spanking her. God, he was going to drive them both crazy at this rate, he thought wildly. She wanted more. “Harder,” she demanded. “Spank me harder.” Brandon paused, resting his palm on her bottom. “Harder?” There was a fine line between what was erotic and what was painful. He knew that a little pain could indeed increase pleasure. An almost pain did indeed increase pleasure. He started to spank her a little harder, letting his hand rise and fall evenly, keeping the 72
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smacks just short of what he thought she was looking for. His other hand was still between her slightly spread thighs, teasing and probing. “Better?” She was almost beyond speech. She jerked when he plunged his fingers deep. “Oh, God.” Her hips bucked as he worked her. He was driving her crazy. He wasn’t just driving her crazy, he was so aroused, he wanted to flip her over and slam into her; take her hard and fast. But not yet. For now, he continued to spank, a little harder now. Her hips jerked even more as he started spanking her a little harder. He loved it when her bottom turned pink as he spanked it. He knew that she wasn’t feeling anything close to pain, either. It was only pleasure. She was on the edge, and he pushed her over at last, spanking even harder, driving his fingers deeply into her all the while. When he felt her clenching around his fingers, and her breathing increase, he spanked harder. Cassie wasn’t sure if she’d survive. The dual sensations of the sharp smacks combined with his fingers driving inside her were going to kill her. That was her last conscious thought as she cried out and let go. Brandon groaned as she came apart for him. He didn’t stop spanking until the shudders began to ease. Only then, did he start to sooth, caressing her pink bottom gently. Finally, when she went limp, he turned her in his lap and smiled. “So, what do ya think of D/s so far?” he teased. “Oh, I dunno,” she replied. “I haven’t learned much yet.” Brandon hugged her tight until she squeaked. She was priceless. “There is a lot more that I want to teach you. But first, on to the hot sex and food!” She shivered. “How hot?” Brandon laughed and swatted her bottom. He lifted her easily and walked with her to the bathroom that was off her bedroom. He grinned at the large shower. He sat her to her feet and opened the stall door, then adjusted the water. “In you go, wench,” he teased. Cassie stepped into the warm water and leaned against the wall, making room for him to join her. He stepped in and pulled her against him. Cassie was quickly lifted against the wall, and Brandon held her in place with his hands on her waist. She wrapped her legs around his waist and groaned when he thrust deeply, hitting her core. He held her tightly, taking her hard and fast, just as she’d 73
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wanted him to. Neither of them spoke, but his eyes were intent on her face as he held her against him. Within only moments, she was thrust over the edge, convulsing around him. Brandon continued to hold her, his corded muscles bunched. “Hot enough?” he asked. A last hard thrust and he tensed, then convulsed with his own release. Cassie unwrapped her legs so she was standing, but braced herself against the wall. Brandon’s hands were still on her hips. “Uh huh.” He used his leverage to turn them both so they stood under the warm spray of the shower. He grabbed the liquid soap and squeezed a little into his palms and began to wash her, starting at her breasts. Cassie arched towards him, loving every second of it. His fingers rubbed over her hardened nipples, and she groaned. She hadn’t thought she had the energy to stand, but she wouldn’t have stopped this for the world. Brandon smiled as he washed her. Her skin was absolutely flawless. He smoothed his hands down her back, and down to her bottom. He took extra time there, smoothing the wet flesh. Cassie moaned as his hands continued to move across her breasts, back, bottom and thighs. She could barely stand now, weakened both by his lovemaking and now, the magic in his fingers. “I don’t think I can stand.” Brandon could relate. But he smiled. “Now, your hair. Wash your hair for me.” Cassie looked at him, but took the bottle of fragrant shampoo and lathered her wet hair, raising her arms to pull the long length on top of her head. Brandon watched her with heated eyes. It suddenly dawned on him that this was the woman that he was going to spend the rest of his life with.
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Chapter Eight Half an hour later, they were sitting at the table eating the sandwiches and soup that Cassie had thrown together. There wasn’t much in the way of food in her house, as she usually ate out. It was still early. Thankfully, she had the next two days off. “Sorry there isn’t much to eat. I hadn’t planned on company.” “It’s ok. I was starving, though. I’d have had to go to Mickey D’s if you hadn’t fed me soon.” She laughed. “I happen to like McDonalds,” she said. He grinned. “So do I. But I’m not planning on leaving here tonight unless you ask me to.” “Oh.” She flushed. “I—I don’t want you to leave.” “Good. Now, eat. You’ve barely touched your lunch,” he said gently. Cassie had never had much of an appetite. She usually existed on bagels and the occasional fast food joint. Salads sometimes. “I’m not that hungry.” His look hardened. “Eat young lady.” “Yes Sir,” she muttered. She picked up the sandwich and took a bite, chewing pointedly. “We need to talk, Cassie. Do you work tomorrow?” She shook her head as she chewed. “Good, I’m off, too. We’ll talk tomorrow. But we’ll go to my house.” “Why your house?” she asked after she’d swallowed. “I want you to see it.” He grinned now. “And I want to show you my study.” “Your study?” She looked at him warily. “Finish your dinner, then, we’ll go talk some more,” he ordered. “Have I mentioned you’re bossy?” she grumbled. “Yup.” He grinned at her. “You’re biting your tongue, aren’t you?” “A little,” she admitted. But she continued to eat the silly sandwich. “So, what’s on the agenda for the rest of the day?” “Sleep—eventually.” She grinned. “Eventually, huh?” 75
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“I think first we’ll have a little discussion about your eating habits, young lady.” His tone was stern, and his eyes bored into hers. “I ate the silly sandwich,” she muttered defiantly, her own eyes narrowed. “And your attitude,” he decided. They had played for hours. He’d really been mostly playing since he’d arrived. But her not eating wasn’t something he was going to tolerate. “Or, we could postpone that discussion till we get to my place tomorrow.” He was only about twenty minutes away, but it was in the outskirts, on a country road, and he really did want her to see his house— and his study. He really did prefer to be at his own home when he did a more serious punishment, not that she really deserved one. But he also wanted to see just how far she’d go with him, what limits she’d want to set on their relationship. “You’re in Dom mode, huh?” He nodded. “Oh yes.” “Well, shit.” She covered her mouth quickly. “That slipped out.” “Did it?” he asked conversationally. He saw that she’d finished her lunch. He stood up. “Your room. Corner. Now.” Cassie looked at him. His entire demeanor had changed. “Yes, Sir,” she mumbled. She stood and with a last look, walked out of the kitchen. Brandon smiled as he cleared away the few dishes. He’d leave her a few minutes to think before he went to her. She was still curious, and still testing the waters, and he could understand that. So, for now, he’d answer her unasked questions in his own way. Cassie stood in the corner of her room once again, this time muttering beneath her breath. Stupid. It had not been smart to test him; he wasn’t bound to appreciate it. She considered apologizing to him before he said much, but decided against it. She sighed. What would he do this time? She wasn’t at all afraid, perhaps wary, though. He was a man of many different facets, not all of which she understood yet. She sighed again. Brandon heard her sigh as he walked into the room. He wondered what she was thinking. He walked over to her and turned her around. “Tomorrow, Cassie, we are going to have a long, long talk. And, afterward, I’m going to give you a long spanking. I want you to understand that.” She looked up at him. “Because I wasn’t hungry? That doesn’t seem fair!” 76
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“Partly,” he admitted. “Partly because I think you need to understand all the nuances of what a relationship with me entails. And, I don’t want you to be afraid of me. But one of the main reasons is that I want you to know that I’m very serious about your taking care of yourself, and that I do not care for your mouth when I’m discussing what I’d like to see.” “I’m not afraid of you, Brandon.” “You are, a little, and we’ll discuss it. But for now, tonight, we’re going to have a discussion about your need to test me.” She looked guilty. “Oh.” He tilted her chin up when she lowered it. “Didn’t you think I’d notice?” “I…I—that is…I wasn’t sure.” He nodded stiffly. “You can be sure, young lady. There isn’t much that I don’t notice.” She gulped. “I’m not gonna like this, am I?” she asked softly. He shook his head. “Probably not.” She shivered, but nodded. She had been testing him, wanting to know what would happen if she did. “Yes, Sir.” “Now, turn back around, and I want that nose right in that corner.” He nudged her around and into the corner, so her nose was actually touching it. “Don’t move, don’t talk. Just think about what’s about to happen.” Brandon sat on the edge of her bed, his brow furrowed. This wasn’t the right setting for what he wanted to do. His mind made up, he walked back over to her and turned her around to face him. “Pack a bag. We’re going to my place.” “We are?” “I want you to come with me, but the choice is yours.” And it was. “Either way, though, you’re getting your ass tanned tonight. “I am?” He nodded. “I thought it might be best to not make you wait until tomorrow for my study.” “Ok,” she whispered. She wasn’t sure if she should tell him how much that Dom voice of his turned her on. There were butterflies in her stomach; yet she was more than a little wary too. He lowered his head and kissed her. “Good girl.” He gave her a gentle swat. “Pack a bag, whatever you need for a day or two.” He studied her for a long moment. “And sweetheart, you don’t need to be as worried as you look right now. I’m not angry with you, but I think you really are asking for answers that I just can’t verbalize.” 77
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“Okay,” she whispered. Cassie tossed some clothes in an overnight bag, and got her toiletries from the bathroom. She couldn’t believe she was doing this. But it was exciting, too. Doing something that she’d never even considered doing before. She was nervous and excited in equal measure. After their shower, she’d dressed in jeans and a purple buttondown shirt. She looked over her shoulder at Brandon. He too had dressed again, but she could still see his muscled chest and the sinew of his thighs as she’d been laid across them. He was a beautiful man, though she doubted he’d appreciate the term beautiful. She wanted very badly to be with him. “I’m ready.” Brandon took the bag from her, and grabbed his own toy bag as well. “Got everything you need?” “I think so. My purse is by the computer.” “Armed and dangerous?” “I don’t go anywhere without my gun, Brandon.” “Hush. You’re a cop, of course you should have your gun. Mine is sitting in my glove box.” “I thought—“ “I know. Let’s go, sweetheart. It’s a short drive. I’ll bring you back when you’re ready.” “I could take my car and follow you.” He looked at her. “Are you on call this weekend?” “No.” “Then you won’t need it. Don’t worry, I’m not kidnapping you.” He grinned. “Although the thought is tempting.” Brandon waited while she locked the front door of her house, then walked with her to the car. He opened the trunk and dropped in the bags, then walked around and opened the door for her. Cassie grinned. “And a gentleman to boot.” “Always.” He watched her slide in, then shut the door. He walked around to his side and climbed in himself. “Nice car,” she said. It was a ’67 Mustang. He loved his car. “Thanks.” “I have a Mustang, but it’s sure not a ’67. Way out of my price range.” “My dad gave it to me. It was my first car. I couldn’t part with it,” he admitted. “I have a few cars. They are my weakness.” “You have weaknesses?” she teased. He glanced at her quickly, then put his eyes back on the road. “We all do, Cassie.“ She sure wasn’t ready to hear that his main weakness was her. He’d never believed in love at first sight; not 78
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before Cassie. He was moving too quickly, pushing her too hard, but he couldn’t seem to stop himself. He wanted her to know she was safe with him, even if he was whaling on her ass. He sensed that she needed to know that as well; which was why she’d been testing him. Her damn the torpedoes attitude to be sure, but he’d answer her unspoken questions the only way he knew how. He considered waiting, but if he did, she’d have more time to second guess herself and she’d either up the ante or she’d be meek and subdued, something he didn’t think he could tolerate. He wanted her feisty and he wanted her secure. Still, he was pretty sure that a real spanking tonight would prevent a harsher one later. *** Within a few minutes, they were pulling on to a dirt road, then down a long driveway. The house was enormous. There were white pillars in the front, and there was a screened in porch on the side. It wasn’t a mansion, but it was damn close. Writing must pay very well, because being a cop sure didn’t pay for a house like this. “God,” she muttered. “I’m impressed.” “It belonged to my parents. As their only child, it came to me when they died in a car crash.” “Oh, I’m sorry.” “It was a long time ago. There are a lot of good memories here, though. I enjoy the solitude.” “I don’t imagine I’m the first woman you’ve brought here,” she said as she started to open the door. “Jealous?” he asked, taking her arm. “Maybe a little,” she admitted. “No reason to be,” was all he said. He told her to wait, then came and opened the door for her. He grabbed the bags from the trunk, and led her to the front door. “Want a tour?” “Sure,” she said. It was a beautiful house. It was designed for comfort. The furniture was in muted brown tones, and looked comfortable. It had a homey feel that she knew she could get used to. There were some feminine touches that made her a little jealous, and she wondered if it was just the way his mother had left it or if he’d had a recent girlfriend. Either way, she liked it. Brandon led her through the house, taking her from room to room, before picking up the bags and leading her up the stairs. He stopped and dropped her suitcase in his room, but held on to the other one. 79
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He led her to a room at the end of the hall and opened the door. It was definitely a man’s room. There was a large desk in front of the window, and the shelves were lined with books. There was a laptop on the desk, one similar to her own. On the other side of the room, there was a leather couch and a few chairs, some with and without arms. It was a nice room. “This is nice.” He grinned and tugged her into the room and shut the door. He sat the bag on the desk, then led her to the couch. “I like it. Thanks.” “So, um, can we talk about this?” He sat next to her and nodded. “Of course we can talk, Cassie. But it won’t stop what is ultimately about to happen.” She was nervous again, and that was ok. He’d have been surprised if she wasn’t. But, still, he didn’t want to make her wait and get scared, either. “Now, what do you want to talk about?” She looked at him. “I want to apologize for testing you. You’re right, I guess I was.” “Do you know why?” he asked softly. “Not really. I guess I just wanted to see what would happen,” she admitted. “Cassie, you tried that earlier tonight. I warmed your ass for it. What is it? Do you need to see just how far I can be pushed?” “Not exactly.” But that was as close as she really wanted to admit. She had seen too much abuse not to be more than a little unsure of this new dimension her life was taking. “Then what exactly. Are you trying to see if I’ll really hurt you?” Part of her was doing exactly that, she realized. She knew her temper, and she knew her tendency to push. She didn’t want that to drive him away or anger him. “Partly, I guess.” Well, he didn’t like it, but wasn’t really surprised, either. Most subs tended to push the envelope, and she was more than just a learning submissive; she was also a highly trained cop. She’d seen things most people never saw. She’d likely seen men and women doing the worst they could to each other. Men beating on women, parents beating on their kids. He’d just have to show her that she would always be safe with him. “Cassie, I need your trust. I don’t want you to test me to see if you can push my buttons. I assure you, I have them, and that you can very likely push them. But pushing my buttons isn’t going to ever make me hurt you. Not like you’re worried about. Now, if you have questions, ask them.” 80
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“Are you angry?” “No, Cassie, I’m not angry. There are still things that you need to learn. I think perhaps I’ve bombarded you today. It’s a lot to take in.” “So, what happens now?” she asked. “What do you want, Cassie? Do you want me to give you a real no-holds-barred punishment? Me, at my most dominant?” He studied her face, while he spoke. She had to really want this. He could be pretty intense, without spanking her any harder or longer than he had earlier, but it was his intensity that made this more difficult for a sub. A little voice in his head told him that there was no reason for a punishment. She really hadn’t done anything to warrant a trip to the study, but as he looked at her, he saw excitement, too. On some level, she wanted to explore as much as he did; but this was so new, and he didn’t want to risk chasing her off by being too harsh. She didn’t really know yet that a study punishment was really only for very serious things; not a little mouthiness or understandable testing of the waters. “I can do that,” he continued. “I decided after five minutes in the same room with you that we’d eventually get to that point— but you won’t like it, at least part of you won’t, and I’d hoped that you’d know me better first. It requires real trust. Trust that I won’t do you any serious harm.” Did she want that? Could she trust him that much? Could she trust herself that much? There was only one way to find out. The idea excited her a little, too. “I think I want you to.” Brandon sighed, and tugged her over and onto his lap. He tilted her head up, trying to read her. There were questions in their green depths, a little fear—and yes, a little excitement, too. But, she was wound as tight as a drum, and she needed calmed a little first. It was for the best that she see exactly what she’d be getting with him as a lover and as a Dom. “Ok, honey. Then that’s what we’ll do. But, first, let’s talk a little bit.” “Ok.” “I told you earlier that there were a few things that would get you into serious trouble with me. One is putting yourself in danger needlessly or carelessly. But, another, and one that I will take just as seriously, is not taking care of yourself. And don’t even try and tell me that you do take care of yourself. You are not eating properly and not taking care of yourself. One look in your refrigerator told me that. I expect you to eat three meals a day, even if they are light meals. Not taking care of yourself, or 81
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otherwise endangering your health and well-being are sure ways to get a spanking you won’t soon forget.” “And for other stuff?” He grinned now. “I like to spank. You know that. There will probably be all kinds of things that will get you a nice warm seat. But not so many that will really earn you a serious punishment. When I give them, I give them well so they don’t need repeated often. I much prefer to just give my sub a nice warm bottom.” His voice changed with warning now. “Once we start this, I won’t stop, though. So be sure it’s what you want. It won’t be more than you can take. It won’t leave any marks that won’t be gone by morning—but you will likely not like it.” He paused a minute. “Do you want to be my sub? My only sub?” “Yes.” She was sure of that much. “And after you’re done?” He smiled gently and cupped her cheek. He kissed her then. “Afterward, I’ll hold you and brush away your tears.” “I might not cry. I’m pretty tough,” she said lightly, trying to lighten the mood a little. “You’ll cry, and ask me to stop, and promise to be good, and likely get angry,” he warned. “But, I won’t stop until I’m sure you’re past that and get what you need from this.” “I won’t get angry,” she promised. “Cassie, you got angry earlier. This will be much more intense. It’s just one of the phases in a new D/s relationship. But it will take you to the point you need to reach.” “And what point is that?” “I can’t explain it, which is why I decided to just show you. You just need to experience it.” Part of it, though, was a certain level of trust. She needed to know that he could be intense and not hurt her; she had to know that she was safe with him. “Ok.” She wasn’t sure what exactly to expect, but was afraid she really didn’t want to know. She looked at him with solemn eyes. “Sir,” he said sternly. “Sir,” she repeated dutifully. The tone was back. His eyes were hard now, not soft as they’d been just moments before. Brandon stood her to her feet and pointed to the corner of the room. “Corner, young lady.” Cassie went to the only free corner of the large study, the one closest to the door. She stood quietly, her hands folded behind her back. 82
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Brandon sighed inwardly. He just couldn’t bring himself to really push her limits. She had absorbed a lot today, and he’d spanked her a lot today, too. But, he could give her what she needed; the answers to those unspoken questions, rather quickly. He checked his watch, deciding to leave her in the corner for five minutes. Cassie wondered what he’d do next. She was nervous. But, she realized, she wasn’t afraid. He wouldn’t hurt her. But time was passing so slowly. How long was he going to make her stand there? Cassie heard him moving and felt the now familiar butterflies in her stomach again. Brandon checked his watch and went over to the desk. He opened his bag and pulled out the rubber paddle he’d made, and sat it on the table, then drew off his belt and sat it next to the paddle, and added his brush, too. “Come here, Cassandra.” “Yes, Sir.” She walked over to him at the desk, looking down at what he’d sat out. “The belt is there just as a reminder that I expect your hands to stay out of the way. He walked over to the chair next to the bookshelves, one that didn’t have arms and sat down. “Now, bring me the paddle and hairbrush.” Cassie knew her hand was shaking, but she picked them up and walked over to stand in front of him. She held the implements out to him. He took them both, but sat them both on the floor next to the chair. “I’m not so sure about this, Brandon,” she whispered. She didn’t know why, but she was suddenly afraid. Instead of pulling her across his lap as she’d expected, though, he pulled her down onto his lap. He positioned her so she was facing the side of the floor where he’d put the implements. “Afraid?” Cassie nodded her head. “I’m sorry. I don’t know why.” “Ok sweetheart. Then we won’t. To be honest, you don’t deserve a major spanking. I guess part of me wants to show you everything, so you’ll really trust me not to hurt you. But I think you’re right, now isn’t the right time. We’ll reserve a major spanking for when and if you really earn it.” He hugged her tight, and felt her shaking. “Sweetheart, what’s wrong? Why are you shaking?” “I’m sorry. I can’t help it,” she whispered. “I just don’t know if I can do this.” “Qualify ‘do this’ for me,” he said gently, holding her close. 83
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“I don’t know if I can handle you like this.” The intensity in him was palpable. She had felt it when he’d started talking. She’d suddenly realized that he was stronger than her; not just physically, which was obvious, but in every way. She’d always chosen partners that were not as strong as she was. That’s what she’d preferred. Now, she was questioning everything about herself that she’d ever believed, and it terrified her. “Do you mean in Dom mode?” he asked. “It’s more than the Dom mode. I like Dom mode. It’s just scary to not know what’s going to happen.” She didn’t know what else to say, so that was as close to the truth that she felt comfortable telling him. He lifted her and carried her to the couch against the wall and sat down, keeping her on his lap. “Sweetheart, I told you earlier— what we did when I used the brush on you earlier, and strapped your hands—that’s pretty much the worst you can ever have to worry about. Was it too intense?” He watched her face carefully, saw the questions and yes, the fear, in her eyes. But, somehow, he wasn’t sure it was just him she was afraid of. There was something more. “Tell me.” Cassie looked at his hands—those hands that were so capable and strong, yet could be tender and gentle at the same time. Then, she looked at his face again. It could light up with that beautiful smile, one that was always matched by the one in his blue eyes. But, within an instant, both could change. His mouth could harden and his eyes did as well. “I—I’m afraid of what you make me feel. I’ve always been strong. I’ve had to be. I’d even thought that I wanted to be. But with you, your strength makes me feel vulnerable.” Brandon changed their positions, folding one leg on each side of him. He cupped her face in his hands tenderly. “You should feel cherished, love.” She pulled her face free and sighed, unsure how to explain. “That’s just it. When you made me watch you making love to me in the mirror, I had no will left of my own. You could have done anything and I wouldn’t have thought to stop you.” “Sweetheart, I’m very intense. That’s where your strength comes in. You’re strong enough to let yourself really feel with me. I want that from you. I need that from you. Your strength is the perfect match for mine.” “Then why do I feel so vulnerable?” she whispered, needing desperately to understand. 84
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“You look at vulnerability as a weakness, Cassie. Not as a strength. I don’t think you’ve ever met anyone that could make you feel vulnerable.” “No,” she agreed. At least not since she’d been an adult. “I haven’t. I didn’t even think I wanted to until I met you.” “And that scares you.” he said softly, finally understanding. “Love, vulnerability is only a weakness when it’s given to the wrong person, to someone who can’t appreciate and cherish the gift. I’m not that man. I won’t use it against you to cause you pain.” “But Brandon, don’t you see? I have to be sure.” “Of course I understand, love. That’s why you were testing me over at your place.” Cassie nodded. “I think so. But, won’t you resent my testing you? Won’t you feel like I’m trying to make you prove yourself?” “No Cassie. I’ll figure that you need reassured that you’re safe with me. At some time, you won’t need that reassurance, but until you reach that point, I’ll give you the reassurance you need, whether it be a hug and loving, or a spanked bottom. You’re safe with me. Your mind is safe, your heart is safe, and your body is safe. But words aren’t going to prove that to you. Actions are; which is why we were in here right now.” He took her face again. “Let’s just go lie down and get some rest, ok?” He’d done too much today, and it had all hit her at once. “I don’t want to be like this,” she whispered, crying now. “I don’t want to be afraid.” “How can I help, love? What do you want me to do?” He pulled her head down and kissed her very gently. “I want you to spank me until I’m not afraid anymore,” she whispered. “I won’t spank you when you’re afraid like this, sweetheart. If you knew me better, you’d know that there was nothing to really fear in any punishment, but you don’t have that level of trust yet. I don’t ever want to make you really afraid of me.” “I need you to. Please,” she whispered. Brandon kissed her again. “And you don’t think you’re strong?” He smiled then. “You are, sweetheart. Ok, I’ll give you what you want. As long as you remember that I care. If it gets to be too much, just use your safeword, alright?” She nodded. “Alright, I promise I will if I need to.”
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Brandon nodded, and his eyes were tender. He gave her a hug first, a fierce one. “I’m not going to ever get enough of you, you know that? “ She smiled. “Good.” She watched as his eyes darkened and the softness left his face. Dom mode. “Now, Cassandra, I want you to tell me why we’re having this session.” She lowered her head. “Because I was testing you.” “What else?” he demanded sternly. “Because you want me to take care of myself?” she asked. He nodded. “Exactly. I don’t particularly mind being tested, but since it bothers you, we’ll work on putting a stop to it. This should assure it doesn’t happen again. And, I will not allow you to not take care of yourself. This will happen each and every time I find out that you aren’t.” He paused, tugging up her chin. “I care about you, Cassie. And I want you healthy. And I want you safe. We’re also going to discuss just how dangerous it was to get online like you did today a little further. That is the type of unnecessary risk I was talking about. You won’t do it again, at least not without remembering this evening, young lady.” He eased her off his lap and led her back to the other chair. “I’m sorry,” she said, her voice breaking. “Please don’t be angry with me.” He brushed away the tears that had already started to fall. He briefly wondered if he should be less intense than normal, but decided against it. Part of her needed to know; even if it was too soon for this kind of scene, she needed it on many levels. “I’m not angry, sweetheart, I promise.” Then his voice hardened. “Now, pick up the paddle, Cassie, and then bend over my lap. You can rest your hands on the floor in front of you.” Cassie stood up and picked up the rubber paddle, then handed it to him. It took her a moment to get herself into the position that he’d asked her to get into. Earlier, she’d been able to rest her upper body on the bed or the couch. Now, she couldn’t do anything but put her hands on the floor. His hand wrapped around her, holding her in place, and he spread his legs a little. “Keep both your hands on the floor, Cassandra,” he ordered. He raised the paddle and brought it down with moderate force on her jean-clad bottom. It stung worse than the brush did, and she winced. Ok, he was right, she did not want this often. She tried to tense, but really couldn’t—when the next swat came, she kicked her legs. “Ouch!” 86
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No warm up this time, he just spanked her with the paddle for five strokes. “I’m sorry,” she said. It had really hurt, especially the last two, which were in exactly the same spot. Brandon tossed the paddle on the floor and turned Cassie over, then helped her stand. Ignoring her tears this time, he pointed to her waist. “Take off the jeans.” Cassie’s fingers moved to her waist, and she unsnapped the jeans and pulled them off. “Fold them and put them on my desk on your way back to the corner,” he ordered. Cassie looked at him, but didn’t argue. “Yes, Sir.” She did as she was told, not daring to touch her tender bottom as she walked back to the corner. She was shaking and nervous. He looked angry, though, and that scared her. What had she done? Or was this just the intensity he’d talked about? She just didn’t know. Brandon looked over to her. Her bottom was very pink, even with the protection of her jeans. He knew his own strength, and had measured each swing to just sting, not cause real pain, but he knew she likely wasn’t comfortable right now. He wasn’t finished, though. Almost, but not quite. Cassie sniffled as she stood in the corner. She fidgeted, trying to ease the sting in her bottom. He hadn’t spanked her that hard earlier. He’d spanked her a lot longer, but not nearly as hard, at least in her mind. Her bottom really stung! She’d apologized, what else did he want from her?” Brandon waited about five minutes, then walked over to her. “I warned you that you wouldn’t like this, Cassandra.” “I know,” she whispered. He turned her around. “What are you thinking?” How was she supposed to answer that? “I don’t really know. It wasn’t what I expected.” “What did you expect?” he asked curiously. “A lot more,” she admitted. “And-and I didn’t think you’d seem so angry.” “Oh, we’re not done yet, Cassandra. Are you angry? And love, I am not angry. I promise.” She shook her head. And she wasn’t. She was guiltier than anything. “No, I’m not angry. I’m just sorry I disappointed you.” He shook his head. “You didn’t, sweetheart. This is all new for you and you have to know you’re safe. Come back over to the couch. Bring the brush,” he added. She wasn’t angry, that was a good sign, and hopefully it meant that she trusted him. This time, 87
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he let her rest her upper body on the couch. Again, he made her hand him the hairbrush. That was part of the punishment, making her give him the implement to be used. “Remember your hands,” he warned. He did not want to strap her hands. “I—I will, Sir,” she whispered through her tears. She was shaking, she couldn’t help it. This wasn’t at all like what they had done earlier. It was a definite punishment, and she wanted it to be over. She clenched one hand on his leg, and put the other under her so she wouldn’t be tempted to reach back. Brandon held her tightly around the waist with one hand and started spanking with the brush with the other, most of the swats centered on the sensitive spot at the base of her bottom. He spanked her with slow, steady strokes, not as hard as those few strokes had been at her house; they didn’t need to be, not with the mindset she was in. The hairbrush really stung with prolonged use. And, spanking slowly meant that she really felt each swat of it. He paused after the first six smacks. He could hear her crying harder, but he didn’t stop just yet. “Remember this Cassandra. I don’t want to repeat it.” He gave her four more swats, two on each cheek, all in the same spot, ignoring her kicking legs and pleas for him to stop. He inspected her bottom during the lull, making sure that there was no sign of bruising. He knew they were stinging, but was sure that she wouldn’t bruise. Cassie’s bottom was on fire. She wasn’t crying from pain, though. She still thought he was disappointed, and that was what was really hurting. “Ye—yes Sir,” she said between sobs. He flipped her over and sat her up, not missing her wince as her bottom rested on his lap. “Does your bottom hurt?” he asked. “Y—yes, Sir” she whispered. Oh, he wanted to hug her. But not just yet. “We are almost finished. But, back to your corner first.” Cassie threw her arms around his neck and sobbed. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I do trust you. I really do.” Brandon held her a moment, then drew her back. He was going to finish this since he’d started it, and he had to stay in Dom mode, and appear unaffected. He was anything but, though. He was angry with himself for doing this, too, it had been too much too soon. “I know , baby,” he said softly. His voice changed. “Back to your corner, Cassandra. We’ll talk in a few minutes.” Cassie scrambled off his lap and went back to the corner, her shoulders slumped, and she continued to sob. He didn’t want her anymore. He had been stern before, but now he was different. 88
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She’d apologized and she’d told him she trusted him. What else did he want? She’d pushed and now he didn’t want her. She suddenly turned around. “Do you want me to leave?” she asked.
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Chapter Nine He was truly puzzled. “What?” He went over to her quickly. To hell with any lesson that she needed or had wanted. “What are you talking about?” He lifted her quickly in his arms and carried her back over to the couch, sitting with her on his lap. He held her close. “Tell me what’s going through that pretty head of yours, little one.” “Y—you don’t want me anymore,” she cried. “I’m sorry.” He stood up and carried her to the door. “Open the door for me, sweetheart.” Cassie reached down and opened the door, clinging to him with her other hand. He carried her to his room and sat on the bed with her still in his arms. “I want you, love. More than you could ever know. Why would I want you to leave?” “You were so distant,” she whispered. “You seemed so angry.” He hugged her, then brushed the tears off her cheeks, and kissed her lightly. “I tried to warn you that you wouldn’t like that spanking, honey. You weren’t supposed to. But I’d have never done it if I’d thought this would go through your head.” He doubted she even realized that he hadn’t even given her that many smacks. He’d spanked her a lot harder at her house. He wondered if she’d realize that it really was the intensity that made a punishment more than a hard spanking. In a punishment, he usually spanked much lighter than he did with some of the play. Pain wasn’t the key in a punishment. But she had to realize it on her own, he didn’t think he could explain it to her. “I can’t be effective if I can’t act in your own best interests. There has to be a clear difference between a fun spanking and a punishment one—at least a serious punishment. There’s no warmup, because it’s meant to really burn. I use whatever I think will be most effective. Subs have more power than most of them realize. I can’t be swayed by tears when I’m spanking you, although at any other time, I’d bend over backwards to help if anything made you cry.” He brushed away more of the tears that continued to fall. “I meant to make you cry, love. I told you that you’d cry.” “You still want me?” He kissed her, hard. “Oh yes, I want you all right.” She smiled. “I’m glad.” 90
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He hugged her again, patting her bottom. “Still feeling guilty?” She nodded. “I gave you a very different spanking, Cassie. And, even though you won’t like it, I’ll probably do it again at some point. But don’t ever, ever think that means I don’t want you.” “I—is the spanking over?” “Do you want it to be?” “I don’t think so. I—I understand now. I want you to finish it.” He frowned. “You won’t like it Cassie. You know that.” “But I’ll know that you care,” she explained. “And you won’t be angry with me.” “Cassie, I’m not angry with you now—I wasn’t when we started this. We’ve talked about anger and D/s. You’ll come to learn the difference between anger and intensity.” “Not angry. But I think I hurt your feelings again.” “No, sweetheart. I didn’t expect you to feel like I didn’t care, but you didn’t hurt my feelings.” “Then finish it, please.” He considered her for a long moment. He didn’t want her feeling guilty, damn it, and she did; although he wasn’t at all sure why. “All right, Cassandra. Go back to the study and wait for me in the corner again.” Brandon stood and paced after she’d walked quietly from the room. She’d never be an easy sub, he was sure of that. But then, if he wanted easy, he wouldn’t be a Dom. Cassie was special. Now, he had to make her understand just how special she was. He went back to the study and sat back down on the couch. Her bottom was barely pink. “C’mere, little one,” he said softly. Cassie walked back over to him. Her bottom had stopped stinging for the most part. She wondered if she should have just said that she wasn’t feeling guilty, but she couldn’t lie to him. She stopped in front of him. He pulled her down across his lap, and without a word, started to spank her. He spanked her as hard as he had at her house, but used only his hand. This last phase had to be more personal, and there was nothing more personal than using his hand. Cassie winced. Although she couldn’t stop herself from crying, she tried for as long as she could not to ask him to stop. Her legs began to kick when her bottom started to really burn. 91
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“You will take care of yourself.” Swat! “You will not swear.” Swat! “You will not test me again.” His hand continued to raise and fall, centering once more at the base of her bottom, and including her upper thighs this time, although he spanked them much lighter. “Do you understand?” He continued the sharp slaps. “Do you understand?” he repeated, his voice firm. Cassie couldn’t help herself. Her hand flew back to cover her bottom. Brandon simply moved it to her waist and held it there, and continued spanking. “Do you understand, young lady?” “Please stop now! Yes, I understand. I promise.” She tried to wiggle away from the burning pain, but he only held her tighter. “I’m sorry.” He paused a moment. “Are you sure you understand me, Cassandra? If we have to repeat this anytime soon, I will not be happy.” “I’m sure. I’m sorry.” Brandon rested his hand on her bottom, and released her hand. “I warned you to keep your hands out of the way.” Cassie turned her head and looked at him. “I’m sorry, Sir.” He didn’t want to strap her hands, but had warned her that he would each time she put her hands back. He had no choice. “Go get the belt, young lady. I warned you.” Cassie scrambled to her feet, walked very slowly to the desk, and picked up his belt. She walked back and held it out to him. It wouldn’t be pleasant, but she held her hand out to him. Brandon stood up and sighed. He tossed the belt aside, breaking one of his own rules. He just couldn’t do it. She was already crying, and her hands were shaking. “I really didn’t mean to put it back there,” she whispered. He touched her cheek, brushing away a tear. “I know. But you did, so tomorrow, you’ll write 500 times I will not put my hands back while being spanked. We’ll see if that sinks in a little better before we resort to strapping your hands. I don’t like strapping hands, Cassie. Don’t force me to.” She grumbled sarcastically, “I think I’d rather you strapped them.” He bent and picked up the belt. “As you wish,” he said. “Hold out your hand.” Cassie looked at him. He was annoyed now. “It was just a bad joke! I’m sorry.” “Hold out your hands, Cassandra.” 92
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Sulking now, she did so, but her eyes were intent on his. She wouldn’t pull them back or ask him to stop. Still, she couldn’t stop the tears. Brandon held her left hand first; he raised the end of the belt and slapped it against her palm, then, without a word, took the other and repeated it. He threw the belt half way across the room, disgusted with himself, and yanked her into his arms. “It’s all over now. Shhh, it’s all over.” Brandon lifted her in his arms again and took her back to his room. He stood her at the edge of the bed, and then carefully took off her shirt and thong. He striped off his own clothes, then lifted her and laid her on the bed. She was still crying when he lay next to her and pulled her into his arms. Brandon lifted her hands to his lips, kissing each one in turn. They were both pink now, but not welted, thank God. Damn it, he’d let her get to him. He’d held back on the lashes, but still, it was a painful lesson. He rubbed her hands together to ease the sting, because he knew she wouldn’t do it herself. “You have to learn when not to make sarcastic comments, love.” “You did that out of spite,” she said angrily. He’d half expected the anger; and damn it all to hell, this was not how a punishment was supposed to end. “No, honey, I didn’t. Although, I’ll admit that I did want to let you know that a punishment is not the time to be sarcastic.” “So, I’m not ever allowed to be sarcastic?” she muttered. “Too damn bad, it’s part of who I am.” Brandon rolled over onto his back and rolled her easily over him. “Not feeling guilty much now, are ya?” he asked. He ran his hands down her back and bottom, cupping the cheeks, kneading gently a moment, then moved down to her thighs. He caressed them too, even though she was glaring at him. “Ok, Cassie. Stop glaring at me.” “Why? Going to get your toys out again?” she demanded. “No, you’re not going to goad me into spanking you again. And if you are trying to make me feel guilty, that’s not going to work either.” He gave her bottom a soft caress. “I have other things in mind for your cute butt for the rest of the night.” He flipped positions so he was lying on her now. He rested his weight on his forearms. She was still glaring, her eyes shooting green fire. “You got exactly what you asked for Cassie. Are you angry because I strapped your hands? Or is it because you’re angry with yourself?” 93
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“You said you never punished if you were angry.” “That’s right. And I didn’t. But Cassie, you need to learn what’s expected during a punishment; that wasn’t the time for sarcasm. And you had been warned what to expect if you put your hand back. What if I’d had the brush? Or that paddle? Do you realize what kind of damage that could do to your hands? I could have broken it for Gods’ sake.” “I want to go home now,” she said dully. Brandon sighed. “Why didn’t you use your safeword, Cassie?” “I—I didn’t want to.” “But now you want me to take you home so you can pout, right?” Damn it! He shouldn’t have strapped her hands. He knew it, too. She was right, damn it. He’d strapped them because he’d been irritated by her sarcasm. Either that, or he should have strapped them immediately, not let the look on her face change the plan. She continued to glare up at him, but his face was soft again, no hint of the Dom of only five minutes before. “I’m not being reasonable, am I?” she said at last. “Maybe not, but you’re awfully cute, so it’s ok.” He kissed her then, hard and deep, forcing her lips apart with his tongue, dueling with hers when she met the passion of his kiss with her own. He lifted his head after a long moment and hugged her. “I messed up, Cassie. If I was going to strap your hands, I should have just done it. But, I didn’t want to. I thought you’d had enough. But, I also have to follow through with what I say I’m going to do, or you will never know when to believe me and when to wonder if you can change my mind about something.” “I keep messing up.” She started to cry again, her tears seeping down her temples. “If any of us were perfect, the world would be pretty boring, sweetie. I think you’re absolutely beautiful. And, if I’m honest, I love that stubborn streak of yours. But, honey, when you’re being punished, you have got to learn to behave yourself and keep your sarcastic comments to yourself. You have no idea how far you’ve progressed in such a short time.” “I’ll mess up again.” “Of course you will, Cassie. But you’ll learn. That’s what these lessons are all about.” He paused a moment, studying her. “But one mistake I won’t make again is to change my punishment plan mid-stream. I will do exactly what I say I’m going to do— even if I don’t want to; because this should have ended with you 94
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feeling better not being angry and hurt. I let my heart get in the way of what I was doing. And that’s never happened before.” Hell, he was just starting to understand himself the significance of that, and knew that she couldn’t yet. She didn’t know him well enough. “But Brandon, you’ll end up being frustrated with me half the time. I am sarcastic a lot of the time.” He grinned. “But do you want to be?” She frowned as she looked up into his grinning face. “Sometimes.” “Usually, honey, it’s ok. Most of the time, in fact, it would probably lead to a little fun time for us. But, when I am really punishing you, I won’t be talked back to—at least not without exacting a price for it.” He paused to let her absorb that. “Now, on the other hand, when we are just talking, or having fun, you can say whatever the hell you want to say. Although, I won’t promise you won’t get a spanking if I don’t like it. But, when and if we are in that study again, I will not tolerate anything but obedience. If I ask a question, you are entitled to answer it. If I ask you if you’re angry, you can tell me you are. But I won’t tolerate sarcasm. You can pout all you want to. You can sulk. Talking back, though, isn’t allowed.” “Ok.” “Don’t say ok if you don’t understand what I’m saying, Cassie. I know all this is new to you, but you accept the ground rules or you don’t. You can’t have it both ways. I’m not going to feel guilty if you don’t like it afterward.” Much, he added silently. Hell, this was more his fault than hers. He’d been so eager to show her as much as he could as fast as he could that she was overwhelmed. Of course she was going to rebel in self-defense. She was just learning about D/s. Just starting to understand herself, and that new knowledge was probably frightening. “I said ok, Brandon. I don’t like it when you’re angry, though.” “I’m not angry, Cassie. I’m concerned that I’m going to scare the hell out of you and lose you.” She smiled now. “You really do care, don’t you?” “Hell yes, I care,” he growled, frustrated that she had to ask— but mostly with himself. “Jesus, did you doubt that?” “How could I know for sure?” she said. “We just met.” “Well, be sure. I do care. Probably more than you’re ready to hear about.” 95
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What could she say to that? She looked up into his eyes, and noticed the muscles in his jaw were clenched tightly. “I’m just not used to people caring. I’m used to just being by myself, it’s hard to explain.” His face lightened, and he smiled gently now. “You’ve spent a lot of time alone, haven’t you?” “I’ve always liked it that way,” she said quietly. “You’re not alone now, love.” He rolled onto his side and kneaded her breasts. “You’re not alone.” Cassie arched into his caress, loving the feel of his hands. “Then love me,” she urged. Brandon rolled over and kissed her gently. “I will.” He raised himself over her again. “I am,” he murmured, driving inside her in one long, smooth stroke. “I do.” Cassie was ready for him, and arched her hips to meet his thrust. Brandon rested his weight over her and held her tightly. “Just let me love you,” he murmured. He ran his tongue across her lips, then nipped them lightly. He moved her hair aside and nibbled on the sensitive pulse beneath her ear, then whispered. “This is going to take a long time,” he promised. “How bout fast, first?” “Tell me what you’ve never done before.” She grinned. “Oh, just about everything you’ve done today,” she admitted. While she wasn’t a virgin, she didn’t sleep around either. It was just a crazy thing to do in this age of disease, but it had been a long time since she’d been really had more than pure sex. “Hmmm, then I’ll just have to use my imagination, but, it’s not gonna be fast.” “How come?” “Because I don’t want it to,” he murmured. She did, though. She wanted it to be hard and fast. She arched up against him again. “I want fast,” she said. “And hard. Very hard.” Brandon eased in and out, thrusting gently, but deeply. He felt her clench around him, trying to drive him over the edge. Brandon pulled out almost totally, and then thrust in again, hard and deep. He used his hands and mouth to bring her to the edge, he kissed her breasts, nipping the nipples and flicking them with his tongue. The slightest touch and she was nearly over the edge. He leaned back on his heels and pulled her against him, thrusting deeply for a 96
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long moment, then pulled out and lowered his head, putting her legs over his shoulders so she couldn’t close to him. He flicked his tongue on her clitoris and she cried out, tightening her legs around him. She’d never liked oral sex. She tried to draw her legs back, but couldn’t. “Brandon…” “Shhh, just let me love you. He used his hands to hold her open to him, then tasted the essence of her, sucking and nipping, then moved up so his mouth was on her clitoris again. He flicked his tongue over it gently, then pinched it gently between his teeth. “Oh God,” she whimpered. Her legs fell open as she started to buck against his hot mouth. He continued to love her with his mouth, ruthlessly driving her to the brink of her release. When she cried out his name, he lifted himself, and moved over her again, driving deep and hard into her. He felt her convulse almost instantly, and thrust hard and deep, giving her what she’d wanted. He continued to thrust until her convulsions stopped, then eased out of her after a long moment. Cassie was breathing hard, her heart was racing, but she didn’t have the energy to move. She couldn’t even help when he flipped her over. He sat on his haunches and pulled her back and slammed her onto him, holding her tightly against him. He moved her hair out of his way again and nipped at her neck, his fingers biting into her hips as he raised and lowered her. She wouldn’t have believed it possible, but felt herself starting over the edge again. She leaned her head back and opened herself wider, wanting more of him. Brandon clenched his teeth, slowing himself again. He didn’t want it to end yet. He eased her over. “Raise that ass up, love,” he said roughly. Cassie quickly complied, and felt him move behind her, his hands found her hips again, and he entered her from behind, driving deep and hard. Cassie heard their bodies slap together as he pulled her into his deep thrusts. She was almost over the edge. She felt him start to spank her between thrusts, and leaned forward, offering him better access to spank. Her bottom still stung, but it was a nice sting, and he was intensifying it. God, how could he know exactly how to get to her? Brandon grinned. So, she wanted that, did she? He waited while she supported herself on her forearms, her head turned on the pillow, her legs spread widely apart. Brandon leaned closer, 97
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and caressed her bottom, then started to spank each cheek. He couldn’t have found a better match for his appetites. He spanked harder now, watching her body jerk with each slap to her bottom. He was on his knees now, driving into her and spanking at the same time. She arched into each thrust, grinding against him now. “That’s it baby, meet me,” he said huskily. He spanked with each thrust, driving into her hard, spanking her hard, giving them both what they wanted. “Oh God,” she muttered. “Oh God” She slammed against him. Brandon pulled her back to him and slammed her down hard on his shaft, holding her, feeling her grind against him. He held her tightly to him then, and felt her shudder with her release, then took his own, bending her over again and driving deep and hard. He collapsed over her, then rolled, pulling her against him. “You’re going to be the death of me, “ he whispered against her neck. He rubbed his now whiskered cheek against the sensitive flesh of her neck. “I can’t wait.” Cassie smiled. “I could say the same.” Her heart still hadn’t resumed its normal pace and her breathing was fast. Her body was covered in a fine sheen of perspiration. “I was going to make love to you slowly and gently, sweetheart.” “Wasn’t that slow?” she asked with a smile in her voice. “Not nearly as slow as I’d intended,” he said. “You’re hard on my good intentions.” “Mm, good.” He flipped her over and gave her a little spank. “Brat.” She rubbed against his hand. “Uh huh. Whatcha gonna do about it?” she teased. He laughed hard. “What would you like me to do about it?” he asked. She wiggled her tingling bottom against his hand again. “I’ve been a very naughty girl,” she said softly. Brandon leaned back against the headboard, and pulled her up with him. He rested her head on his chest, running his fingers through her hair, gently untangling it. “How have you been naughty?” he asked, amused. She considered a moment, then reached her hand out and tugged hard at the hair on his chest. “Like this,” she said simply. Brandon growled low in his throat, then pulled her hand away from his chest. “What do you suggest?” he asked again. She grinned impishly. “I think I deserve a spanking.” 98
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Tongue in cheek, he gave her a mock-stern look. “Should I take you back to the study?” he teased. He ran his hand down her back, cupped her bottom. “Lay you over my lap and spank you for a half hour or so?” She looked up at him with wide eyes. “Can you spank that long?” “Oh yeah, I can spank that long. Do you want to see if you can be spanked that long?” He continued to caress her bottom as he waited to see if she really wanted to play. “I wouldn’t mind.” “Umm, maybe.” She wiggled against his hand again, rubbing against his palm. He leaned back, and pulled her across his lap. “Or, I could just sit right here, where it’s nice and comfortable.” “Here is fine,” she said breathlessly. Brandon looked down at her bottom. He really did like her ass—a lot. “So, tell me, little one, what kind of a spanking do you think you deserve?” He gave her a sharp smack, then rubbed away the sting. “Like that?” It still amazed him that she liked to be spanked hard when he played. He hadn’t spanked her nearly as hard in the study. She moaned. “Just like that.” He decided to let her test her wings. “Ok, but here are the ground rules this time. When you’ve had enough, just tell me before you get angry. I can get a little intense, even when I’m playing sometimes.” “Ok, what else?” “While we play, I’m in charge. Unless you safeword, you’re in my hands.” Let’s see just how brave you are, little girl, he thought. “Agreed?” “Ok.” “One more thing—if you get angry, I’m going to get pissed off. And once I get unpissed off, I’m going to be in a mood to take you to my study again for a real spanking.” “Can I be a brat?” He laughed. “Oh yeah, brat is great.” He paused, gave her a little smack. “But none of your mouth.” She considered that. “All right.” “Let’s see. First, I think we’ll start with a little warm up. Ok?” He rested his palm on her bottom. “Warm up is good,” she whispered, shivering. She loved his hands. 99
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Brandon set an easy rhythm, spanking lightly, covering her entire bottom with smacks. “Naughty little girls deserve to be spanked, don’t they? “Yes,” she breathed. “Yes, Sir.” She held very still, just enjoying the feel of his hand. One arm rested across her waist, holding her against his lap. He began to spank her a little harder and faster. “Still ok?” he asked. “Uh huh.” She wiggled against his hand again. He kept up that pace, but paused every few spanks to rub gently. “Good girls deserve spankings too, sometimes, don’t they?” he asked. “Am I a good girl?” she asked. “You tell me.” He spanked a little harder now, still soothing after every few spanks. He loved it when her bottom began to get warmer. “I’m a brat tonight,” she decided. “Are brats good girls?” She reached back her hand and tugged on the hair on his thigh. He pulled her hand back with a chuckle and held it against her side with his arm. “Brats can be good girls.” He spanked her in a steady rhythm now, each smack just hard enough to sting. He stopped rubbing for a few moments, just spanked in that same pattern, spanking the fleshiest part of her bottom now, loving the sound of his hand smacking the soft flesh. This was the kind of spanking he liked to give; the sensual erotic ones. The others, the punishments, were sometimes necessary, but this was what he loved. Cassie never had a thought of asking him to stop. Her bottom was getting nice and warm now, but she found it very arousing. But, she wanted scolded, too. “I might say a bad word,” she said impishly. He grinned, his hand paused. “If you say a bad word, young lady, I might find a bar of soap and wash out your mouth.” Well, she didn’t want him to do that. “Oh. Then maybe I won’t.” He chuckled. “Then again, I might just spank you a little harder.” “Which one, do ya think?” she asked. He continued to spank as he pretended to ponder. “Are you going to try and find out?” They were playing. She didn’t think he’d really wash her mouth out with soap. “What the hell. Why not?” 100
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He laughed. “Somehow, I thought you might.” He gave her several sharp smacks. “Remember, I don’t like it when ladies swear.” He spanked her faster now, but not too hard. “I forgot,” she said. He was spanking her a little harder now, and she felt herself moving against his hand, arching up for each spank. He gave her a very hard swat. “No fibbing, young lady.” “Ok,” she said. “I didn’t forget.” “I didn’t think so.” He gave her several more smacks. “Sometimes naughty little girls need to spend some time in the corner,” he teased. “I don’t want to go to the corner!” she muttered in that petulant tone he was coming to know. “And sometimes, it doesn’t matter what they think they want,” he said, making his voice stern. He gave her a hard smack, then soothed it with his fingers, brushing them lovingly across her bottom, easing the sting. She turned her head and looked at him, pouting. “I don’t want to go to the corner.” “Are you arguing with me, young lady?” He gave her a few hard smacks. “Ouch!” Ok, that had stung, but it aroused her, too. He continued to spank her, smacking the fleshiest part of her bottom. It was getting pinker and warmer now. He smiled at her. “No arguing, little girl,” he said. For the next few minutes, he spanked her, but didn’t speak. Gradually, he increased the intensity of the spanking, wanting to see where her tolerance was—at what point pleasure became discomfort. That would let him know just how hard to spank to give her the most pleasure when they played. Cassie moaned. But she didn’t want him to stop—not yet. “Harder,” she ordered before she could stop herself. Brandon continued to spank as he spoke. “Are you sure? I can spank quite a bit harder, little one. Remember, no temper if you don’t like it.” She pounded her fist on his leg. “Harder!” Now that she’d felt the pleasure-pain, she wanted the release. Ah, she wanted to cry again. She’d found the release and freedom that tears could initiate, and wanted to feel it again. He pulled her hand away and held it against the small of her back, then began to spank her harder, moving his hand to the sit spot as well, although he didn’t spank there as long or as hard, he still was 101
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intent on covering her entire bottom with the stinging smacks. “Don’t tell me what to do, young lady. You might not like it,” he warned. “Ouch, ok!” He spanked several more times, in rapid succession. “Ok what?” he demanded, continuing the stinging spanks. “Sir!’ She answered quickly. She felt her eyes start to burn. The combination of lecturing and spanking made her feel safe. She didn’t even try and explain it—not even to herself. It just was. “I’ll be a good girl.” “I’m sure you will little one. But, let’s just make sure of that.” Now that she was warmed up, he could spank harder. So, he did, bringing his hand high and letting it fall with resounding force on her upturned bottom. Cassie started once more to wriggle, but she couldn’t get away, wasn’t even sure that she wanted to. Her eyes were burning now. He knew he’d been spanking her for at least twenty minutes or so. Of course, the first fifteen or so were pretty light smacks. He was impressed, though. A long session didn’t scare her, in fact, she’d asked for this one. “Should I get the hairbrush, little girl?” “I—I’d rather you didn’t, Sir,” she said quickly. “Perhaps you’re right. My hand is quite effective, isn’t it, young lady?” He gave her several more hard smacks. He knew she wanted to cry. If this didn’t work, though, he knew just a few with the brush would. “Yes, Sir.” She answered quickly. “I’m sure I’ll be a good girl,” she said. “I think you should think about how naughty you were earlier today.” He spanked her as he talked, light spanks. He decided then to change positions. He eased her over. “Now, I want you to stand up, little girl. But don’t go anywhere. I just want to change our positions.” Cassie scrabbled off his lap and went over to the side of the bed, then stood up, waiting to see what he would have her do next. Brandon sat up himself and moved to the edge of the bed. “Now, come back over my lap, but put your legs on the floor, not on the bed.” This would give him much better access to the sensitive spot he wanted to spank now. It took away the protective curve, fully exposing her bottom to him. “Now, little girl, let’s discuss the cussing you did a while ago,” he said. He spanked the area above her thighs again. The smacks he delivered were constant now. 102
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Cassie winced. She tried to pull away. It was really starting to sting. How was it he knew just the spot that stung the most? “Oww, are you done yet?” she wailed. He paused. “Do you want me to stop?” She started to cry at last, but shook her head. “I’ll be good, Sir,” she whimpered. “I promise.” He heard her crying, but didn’t stop just yet, although he did lighten the spanks, and pulled her legs back up over the side of the bed. “I’m sure you will, little one.” He spanked a little more, moving the spanks around, light ones mixed with ones a little harder. “Remember, you wanted this.” She did remember, but that didn’t mean that she could hold still. She struggled in earnest now. She knew he’d been spanking her for at least a half an hour now. She couldn’t stop crying. Her legs kicked up and down as she tried to evade the stinging smacks. She started to tense with every smack now. She started to reach back, but caught herself in time. “It hurts!” she cried. “Please, Brandon, it hurts!” Brandon stopped immediately, reminding himself that this wasn’t a punishment. He didn’t let her up yet, though. Instead, he rubbed her bottom gently, easing the sting. “Ok, love. Ok.” Finally, he turned her over and sat her up on his lap. He pulled her against his chest. “Better?” he asked softly. “Y—yes.” She clung to him, holding him as she cried. She didn’t even know why she was crying, or why she’d wanted him to help her cry. “Thank you.” “My pleasure, sweetheart.” He held her and just let her cry. She clung to him. There was still something bothering her, he sensed. He wasn’t sure what it was, though. “Make love with me?” she said at length. He held her gently. “I’m not sure that’s such a good idea right now, sweetheart. Spanking you turns me on big time. I don’t think I could be slow or gentle, and that’s what you need right now.” “I don’t want you to be.” “Are you sure?” he asked, looking intently into her damp green eyes. “I’m sure,” she said. “We’re going to have a long talk when we’re done, honey. And I mean really talk.” “’Kay,” she whispered. 103
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Brandon lowered his head and kissed her tears away, then kissed her mouth, a deep, penetrating kiss. He moved his hands to her breasts and teased them, flicking his fingers over her erect nipples. “Do you like that?” he asked softly. She let her neck fall back and arched into the caress. She wanted more, though. “Please,” she whimpered. Brandon leaned her over his arm and lowered his head to her breast. He drew on it deeply, suckling. With his free hand, he started at her neck, and slowly moved his hand down to the juncture of her thighs, then eased them apart. She opened her legs easily, wanting his touch. He drove two fingers deep, using his thumb to again tease her to orgasm, only this time, he brought her over the edge hard and fast, not stopping the strokes until she was convulsing in his arms. Brandon waited until her shudders stopped, then lifted her off his lap and onto her stomach on the bed. He stood behind her and pulled her to him, driving deep. He groaned as she surrounded him like a glove. Cassie reveled in this new position. He was pulling her against him as he drove hard into her, holding nothing back in the depth of his strokes. He reached her core with each hard thrust. Brandon groaned as she clenched around him almost immediately with her release, but he had yet to reach his own. His hands were hard on her hips as he drove into her, slamming deeply, skin slapping against skin. He knew he should slow down, but he couldn’t. He moved quickly, finally giving one last hard thrust as he came inside her, holding her against him hard. Brandon eased away from Cassie, then moved her gently to the center of the bed, making room for himself so he could lie next to her. “Sorry, love, I don’t think you got too much out of that.” Cassie grinned. “If I’d gotten any more from it, I’d probably be dead.” She ran her fingers down his stubbbled cheek Brandon smiled. He caught her palm and brought it to his lips. He kissed it, then put it back on his chest. “I am so very glad I met you, little one.” Cassie smiled sleepily. “Me, too.” His hard body was pressed against her side and she arched closer to him. “Thank you, Brandon.” Her body was weak and sore, but it was a good soreness. She couldn’t remember a time when she’d felt so cherished. Her fingers trailed down his chest, just touching him.
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“I should be thanking you, Cassie. You’re a perfect match for me.” He brushed her hair with his fingers. He loved her hair Hell, he loved her. “Sleepy?” “Mmm, uh huh.” She looked into his eyes. Such beautiful eyes. “Then sleep, love. I’ll be here when you wake up.” Cassie closed her eyes, curled her fist against his chest, and was soon fast asleep.
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Chapter Ten Brandon held her against his side and watched her sleep. Her hand was still in that small fist, resting on his chest. He smiled, gently brushing her hair. She was more than he’d ever expected her to be. He’d been in several serious relationships throughout his adulthood, both D/s and vanilla. He had enjoyed both, although, of course, he preferred the D/s to the vanilla. He’d certainly put Cassie through the paces today. He’d done much more than he’d planned, certainly. When he’d heard her voice on the phone, he’d known that he wanted her. When he first saw her at the door, he knew that he wanted to spank her. But that was all he’d planned. Maybe have a new play partner for real-life that was local. She’d been much more receptive than he’d ever anticipated. He knew he didn’t want to let her go, but would she feel the same way? If anyone had told him this morning that he’d fall in love by the end of the day he’d have laughed at them. Yet, he had done exactly that. He held her closer to his side and closed his own eyes. They’d talk tomorrow. *** Cassie awakened with a start. It took her a moment to realize where she was. When she did, she smiled. Yesterday had been incredible. She’d learned a lot about herself. He really was something else. She looked over at him. There was a heavy stubble of beard. He was perfect. Sexy as hell. She actually thought she might be in love with him. Could he feel the same? He’d hinted at it last night; when she’d said love me. He’d said I do. But had he meant it? She hoped so. She had been so afraid that she’d pushed him away by being so stubborn. She had to admit that there was a lot about D/s that she didn’t understand yet. But she knew she could learn—she’d learn whatever he wanted to teach her. She’d never thought much about taking care of herself. Oh, she was in good physical shape; had to be for her job. Yet, he’d been right. She didn’t eat properly and never had. Something told her that he’d change that if he were around to do so. 106
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One thing that she had definitely learned, though, was the difference between playful spankings and serious ones. He was intense, just as he’d warned her he was. That intensity both excited and terrified her in equal measure. He seemed to know what she was thinking most of the time before she did. How could he know her so well after so short a time? Cassie had always been good at was keeping a part of herself distant in relationships. She didn’t want to do that with Brandon. She smiled to herself. He thought she was beautiful. She knew she wasn’t unattractive, but no one had ever told her she was beautiful. She’d always been self-conscious about her breasts, but he’d really seemed to like them. He seemed to really like her. Cassie ran her fingers over Brandon’s jaw, careful not to wake him. She climbed from the bed and went to the bathroom attached to his room and looked in the mirror. She turned around and tried to look over her shoulder to see if her butt was bruised. It wasn’t. There was no evidence of the spankings yesterday. She went out to the room again and grabbed her overnight bag and pulled out her toothbrush and toothpaste, then picked up his discarded shirt and put it on. She went back to the bathroom. When she came back out, Brandon was sitting up in bed with a grin on his face. “Morning.” “Good morning,” she said shyly. “That shirt looks better on you than it ever did on me,” he murmured. She blushed. “You don’t mind?” “Of course not, silly.” He climbed out of bed, totally unselfconscious, and walked into the bathroom himself. Cassie stood where she was, unsure of what she should do now. She thought about going into the kitchen and making breakfast. She heard the shower and considered joining him in there instead. She actually took a step back toward the bathroom. No, if he’d wanted her to join him, he’d have invited her. She headed for the bedroom door instead. “Cassie?” Brandon called. She stopped. “Yes?” “What are you waiting for?” he demanded. “Get in here.” She grinned. “Ok.” She walked into the bathroom and took off his shirt, smelling his scent and sighed. Brandon sat his toothbrush down and walked to the shower door. “Coming?” 107
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She nodded and joined him in the shower. “I didn’t want to just invite myself.” “I’m a firm believer in water conservation,” he said. He held out his hand to her. “C’mere.” She walked into the shower with him. Brandon pulled them both under the warm spray. “Did you sleep alright?” he asked. “Uh huh.” She looked down and saw his morning erection. God, she wanted him. He’d picked up the soap and had apparently decided to wash her first. He soaped his hands and started at her breasts. His hands were gentle as he washed her. When his hands moved down to the juncture of her thighs, she moaned. “Oh God,” she whispered. He eased her legs apart and rubbed softly. “You’re beautiful in the morning.” “So are you,” she whispered breathlessly. Her head fell back as he continued his ministrations. Brandon grinned at her. “Ya think?” “Oh yeah,” she decided. “Most definitely.” Brandon eased his hand back and turned her around. He soaped his hands again and massaged her shoulders. “You’re tense.” He smoothed his hands down her back, then across her bottom. “Nice and white,” he murmured. “I checked,” she admitted. He grinned. “I don’t leave bruises, honey.” She nodded. He was still caressing her bottom and legs with his soapy hands. He gave her bottom a light smack, enjoying the sound of his hand on her wet flesh. “Hey!” But she giggled. “Have I mentioned that you’ve got a cute ass?” he asked conversationally, his voice husky. “A really cute ass.” “I think you might have mentioned it a time or two,” she whispered. He gave her another light smack on the other cheek and grinned when she arched back against him. “Like that, huh?” She did. “Yes.” “Ever been spanked in a shower?” he asked. She grinned. “No.” “Wanna be?” he asked, caressing her bottom gently. She considered that. More new things he was teaching her. He was expanding her sexuality with everything he did. “Just a little,” she said. 108
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“Move up and put your hands on the wall, then,” he said huskily. Cassie moved out of the shower spray and braced her hands against the wall. She felt him move closer and shivered. How could he turn her on so easily? She felt his hand caress her bottom again. “Just a little?” he asked. Her bottom was wet, and he smoothed his hands across it. “Uh huh.” She wiggled a little bit, anticipation making her heart race. Brandon moved to adjust the shower spray so it’d reach her, then moved back to her, to the side. He reached his hand back and gave her a sharp little smack on the ass. He never got tired of that sound. It was magnified in the small confines of the shower. He smacked her again, a little harder. There were now two prints from his hand on her bottom. He gave her a couple more gentle slaps, knowing that the water intensified the sensation for her. “This is strange,” she muttered. Brandon smoothed his hands over her bottom, cupping both cheeks in his big hands. “Strange in what way?” he asked. “I don’t know. Just different. But I like it.” He grinned and gave her a couple more smacks. “Good, so do I.” There would be time later to spank her if she wanted it, but now, he had other ideas. He moved against her, letting her feel him against her bottom. “Lean over a little more,” he whispered. Cassie bent over a little, still holding onto the wall. Brandon bent a little, positioned himself and entered her in a smooth thrust. He held her hips, bracing her for his thrusts. When he felt her start to shake, he eased out, turned them both around so he was leaning against the wall, and then lifted her. “Wrap your legs around me, love. This is gonna be a quick ride.” Cassie couldn’t think, but she could act. She wrapped her arms around his neck, and her legs around his hips and felt him drive into her. Holding her, he moved forward a little, moving them away from the spray and lifted her into his powerful thrusts. When he felt her release, he quickened his pace, taking her hard and fast. It was over in few minutes. Brandon leaned back against the wall, breathing hard. “Morning,” he said with a chuckle. “I think I’m awake now,” she said, giggling. 109
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He hugged her. “Good.” He was still holding her, his hands now on her bottom to keep her against him. He moved them both back beneath the spray for a few moments, then stood her to her feet. “Now, we need food.” As if on cue, her stomach growled. “Yeah, I could eat,” she admitted. “I think you’ll find my cupboards hold a little more than yours do.” He reached down to turn off the shower, then opened the shower door, and reached for towels. He handed her one and turned around. “Wanna dry my back for me, please?” Cassie used the large towel and dried his back as he’d asked. His shoulders were wide. He wasn’t a weight lifter or anything, but damn he was built. She loved touching him. She couldn’t resist a smack on his butt. He spun around. “Did you really just swat me?” he demanded incredulously. Her grin was wicked. “Uh huh.” Her eyes widened when his eyes narrowed. “Oh shit, I was just playing.” Brandon just looked at her. She was a brat. He’d been furious for about half a heartbeat, no sub had ever dared swat him, and he didn’t mind a bit, he realized, and he grinned. “I’m gonna play, too.” “Are you mad?” she asked. “Nope. I thought I was, but I’m not. I just realized that I really love brats. I’ve never had a sub with the nerve to swat me. I love you, sweetheart. Of course, for every swat you manage to get in on me, I’m gonna return twenty of my best.” He pulled her to the commode and sat down, pulling her across his lap. “Wait, wait! I didn’t know I wasn’t allowed!” she said quickly, squirming. “You’re allowed,” he said. “This is what you get in return.” He gave her twenty smacks, although not that hard. He was laughing as she squirmed and squeaked. Finally, he at her up to her feet. She looked furious, and he chuckled again. “I’m a Dom, sweetheart. Sorry.” Cassie glared, rubbing her bottom. “You don’t sound sorry.” He was still laughing. “Prolly cuz I’m not.” She sputtered. “That wasn’t nice.” “Sure it was. I could have gotten the paddle. Just imagine twenty with the paddle on a wet butt.” She laughed. “You are a jerk.” 110
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He shrugged, grinning. “You’re a brat. What’s your point?” He kissed the tip of her nose. “Gonna swat me again?” “I’ll never tell!” Of course she would, though. Now that she realized he wasn’t at all mad. “Smart, too.” He grinned. “God, I love you.” “Do you really?” she asked very seriously, her eyes intent on his face. That was the second time he’d said it. Her heart gave a little flutter as she waited for him to answer. Brandon looked at the almost fearful look on her face. “I do, yes,” he said gently, caressing her face. “Does that scare you?” She clung to him and shook her head. “No, I was just afraid to believe it. I’ve been awful, how can you know you love me?” He lifted her up and carried her back into the bedroom. He sat on the bed, holding her on his lap. “You haven’t been awful, Cassie. Why would you say that?” he asked, keeping his voice gentle. “You’ve been angry with me. I can tell.” She buried her face against his chest; her fingers running though the thick mat of dark hair there. “I’m not really good at relationships—if that is what we’re having here.” “Sweetheart, I realized I loved you when I was punishing you, when I realized that I didn’t want to do it. I’ve never really liked to discipline a sub, not a real discipline, but I’ve always known it was necessary. But when I pulled you into the study, I realized that I didn’t want to spank you, not as a punishment. And I knew it was because I loved you. I fell hard and quick.” “I love you, too,” she said, her voice filled with pain. “I’m sorry I asked you to do it.” He tilted her chin up. “I’m not sorry. Besides, it was my idea before we left your house. Love, subs get punished, at least mine do. I am pretty strict. And before we came over here to my house, I realized that I needed to punish you—not to hurt you, but to make sure that I wouldn’t scare you away. I’ve never worried about that before. And then, when we were in the study, I realized that you hadn’t done anything to deserve being punished for. I shouldn’t have done it at all, and when I realized that, I knew for sure that I loved you.” “I did deserve it.” He shook his head. “Not really, love. Remember what I said about lots of things that would get you spanked?” When she nodded he continued. “I like to spank, a lot. A spanking isn’t always a punishment, not a real one. What I put you through 111
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yesterday was a real punishment, and one that you didn’t really deserve. A scene like that is supposed to be for major biggies. But, I think we both wanted to see how you would react to it. So, yeah, I’m sorry in a way that I initiated it, but glad as hell that you can deal with me when I’m that intense.” “I was afraid.” “And that’s my real regret love. I don’t want you to be afraid of me, not really afraid. I expect you to be wary of being punished, not to truly fear it.” She’d already realized that she didn’t like him being disappointed. In less than 24 hours, she’d learned more than he’d thought possible. “I’m not afraid now, though; now that I know what to expect.” “All punishments aren’t the same, but the basics are. I probably sound cold, but please understand that I have a reason for it. I have to be in the right mindset. Just like you do. But don’t think even for a minute that it’s about getting even, or that I’m angry.” “But you said you didn’t want to—“ “Want to know a secret?” he asked gently, cutting her off. “Yes,” she said instantly. “I’ll still punish you if you deserve it, whether I really want to or not. And it won’t make me love you any less. Your fire is what I love about you. Punishing you is supposed to be hard for both of us, little one. If I got off on it, or looked forward to it—for the wrong reasons, I wouldn’t be a Dom, I’d be an asshole.” “Ok,” she said. She wasn’t sure she really understood exactly what he meant, but she was content for now. “I do love you.” “I’m so glad,” he admitted. He saw her shiver and stood her up. “Cold?” Standing naked, she nodded and shivered again. Brandon went over to the dresser and opened his drawer. He pulled out a pair of pajamas that he never wore, and handed her the top. He took the bottoms and put them on. Cassie put on the top and buttoned it up. “Ok, now feed me, woman. I’m starving.” “I have to cook? Pretty brave, aren’t you? I don’t cook much.” He shrugged. “Time to learn,” he decided. “But, I’ll help.” Brandon took her hand and walked with her to the kitchen. Cassie was impressed. It was a nice kitchen. The appliances were top of the line and looked new. He obviously knew his way around a kitchen. “You cook,” she accused. 112
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“I eat, therefore, I cook. I’ll teach you.” He pulled out what he wanted from drawers and cabinets. Next, he got eggs and milk from the refrigerator. “How do pancakes sound?” It sounded like way too much. If she ever ate breakfast, it was a cereal bar or something. “Like more than I can eat,” she admitted. “Do the best you can. I don’t expect you eat and make yourself sick, but I want you to start eating a little better. I love that sexy body, and I don’t want you to lose weight.” “Ok.” He grinned. “Good girl.” Cassie watched him as he efficiently put together the ingredients to make the pancakes. Brandon looked over at her while he mixed the batter. “Coffee, woman. We need coffee.” She smiled. “Well, I suppose I could make some,” she said. Cassie found the coffee and started it. He gave her a mock-stern look. “Only fair, since I’m slaving over a hot stove.” “Uh huh,” she murmured. “Ya look really good there, too.” They worked together in a comfortable silence while they prepared the breakfast. Within a few minutes, they were sitting at the table. Brandon watched her as she ate. She really wasn’t a big eater, but she did eat two pancakes. “What are we doing today?” Cassie asked. “Got any ideas? “ he asked. “Not really. I’m just enjoying being here,” she admitted. “I’m glad, little one.” He took a sip of coffee. “I think we should talk a little bit, though.” “Ok.” She shrugged. Brandon grinned, then. “Among other things.” Cassie looked at him warily. “What other things?” He pretended to ponder that a long moment. “Well, of course, we should spend at least half the day in bed.” Cassie grinned. “Sounds good to me.” It sounded good to him, too. Doing just about anything with her sounded good to him, for that matter. “You know, I don’t make a habit of meeting women on the Internet and bringing them home with me,” he pointed out. “That’s good,” she said, meaning it. She didn’t want this to be some kind of weekend fling. Part of her worried that would be 113
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what it turned into. “I don’t usually invite strangers to my apartment.” He grinned wickedly. “Good thing for you, too. Because if you did, I’d have to really tan your hide for you.” Cassie flushed. “I think you already did that.” “Sure did, but not for inviting me over,” he said with a chuckle. She gave him a serious look, then grinned. “I’m surprised you didn’t anyway.” Ha actually grinned. “I considered it. But then, decided since it was me…” She laughed. “Double standard, huh? Why am I not surprised? “Because, my dear, you are a very intelligent woman,” he said with a large, wicked grin. “Well, that’s true, of course,” she said, grinning. Brandon sat his plate aside and rested his elbows on the table. “You have a really cute smile, ya know.” “Thanks.” “Ok, so, I thought we should talk today.” “About?” She didn’t know why she was suddenly nervous, but she was. Was he going to tell her that he’d changed his mind about wanting her around for a while? She looked at him and waited. “Us, to begin with. Do you still want to be mine?” He waited tensely for her answer. He wasn’t sure what he’d do if she said no; wasn’t sure if he could let her go. “Yes,” she said softly. “I do. If you want me.” He frowned now. “I told you I wanted you, sweetheart. Hell, I wanted you the minute I first saw you.” “Why?” she asked suddenly. “Why did you want me?” He thought about that for a few seconds. “Well, let’s see. The first thing that attracted me was your comment in the chat room. Then, it was your voice on the phone. And, next, it was when I first saw your face.” He walked around the table and tugged her up and hugged her, then kissed her. He sat in her chair and pulled her down onto his lap, then grinned. “Then, there was the fact that you’re so tiny I can practically lift you with one hand,” he teased. “So,” she began, “it was physical attraction?” “No,” he said immediately. “I hadn’t seen you on the Internet or on the phone, remember?” “Well, no, but didn’t you just want someone to play with?” He shook his head. “Partly. I decided pretty quickly that if you wanted to really learn about D/s that I wanted to be the one 114
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that taught you about it. I like your fire—your spirit. You’re an amazing woman, Cassandra. I don’t think you realize it. I want to be around when you finally do realize it, though. I want to be here to help you learn about yourself. I loved watching you watching us make love yesterday in the mirror. Hell, Cassie, I love you. Everything about you. Your stubbornness, your naiveté, your beautiful body. I love you in all your many facets, and I can’t wait to explore them all with you.” “I’m not anything special,” she said. “I’m just me.” “Just you? That’s who I want, love. Just you. Just as you are.” He held her close. “The last 24 hours have been a lot for you, I know that. Time and time again, I told myself that I was going too fast—but I couldn’t stop—didn’t want to stop.” He hugged her again. “But, it’s up to you. I can’t decide for you whether you want to explore this and see where it leads. You have to decide that.” “I’m afraid I’ll disappoint you,” she admitted. She reached up and touched his face. He hadn’t shaved, and she liked the rough look of him. “Don’t you see?” “No, I don’t see, Cassie. There will be times when I get disappointed, there will be times when I will disappoint you, too. It’s all part of a relationship. And before you ask, that’s any kind of relationship; either a D/s one, or a vanilla one.” “And if I disappoint you?” she asked. “Then I’ll be disappointed. You’ll likely get a hot seat,” He paused a moment, studying her face. Her eyes were dark and troubled. “What did you think I’d say?” “I’m not very good at relationships,” she said again. “You may well change your mind.” “You haven’t been in a relationship with me, Cassie. I’m probably not like any other man you’ve ever known. Like you, I’m just me.” He stood up, keeping her in his arms easily. He carried her out of the kitchen and into the living room. He sat on the couch and held her on his lap. “Do you want to tell me about your last relationship?” Cassie shrugged. She didn’t want to talk about it at all, actually. “No, not really.” Brandon decided not to push her about it. “Then, at least tell me this: Do you think that I’m going to not want you anymore if you aren’t the perfect little sub? If you don’t obey me without question? If you forget and put your hands back if I’m spanking you?” 115
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She shrugged again, curing her finger in her hair. “I don’t know.” “Tell me, Cassie. What do you think a good sub is?” “Someone the complete opposite of me. Someone obedient.” He laughed at that. “Honey, I want a sub, not a doormat. Have you changed your mind? Do you want to have a relationship with me without the D/s? I’ll admit that I want both, but I don’t want more than you want to give.” “No. I don’t want to change my mind. I think I’ve been looking for what we had yesterday without even knowing it. But, I couldn’t bear it if I did something that disappointed you.” “Why?” “Because you’d eventually get tired of me not doing what I was supposed to do.” “Hmm…so, let me see if I understand. You think that if you’re perfect, the perfect obedient woman and sub, never doing anything to displease me, that I would be pleased? She nodded. “Of course.” He shook his head. Someone had really done a number on her. “Wrong, little one. Part of my fun being a Dom is that I get to help you grow within this lifestyle. And, luckily for me, that means that when you need to work on something, I get to spank your cute butt. I like that. I want that. I’m not what is known as a Master. I don’t want a slave. I want a sub, and a partner. For the most part, I want an equal partner. I do like being in control, I’ve told you that. But only within certain limits. I don’t want to dictate your every breath and movement. Mostly, other than the things we’ve already talked about, such as your health and welfare, I want you to be you, just as you are. When there are things that you want to work on, that is where I get to have my fun. The more time you take to change the things you want to change, the more fun I have.” “So you won’t mind if I’m not perfect?” she asked. “Of course not. Now tell me something, and be honest, ok?” “Ok.” She wanted to believe him. She needed to believe him. Was it him she didn’t trust, or more herself? That was the question she didn’t have the answer to. “D/s aside, I mean the physical aspects of it, do you trust me not to hurt you intentionally?” “Yes. I don’t think you’ll intentionally hurt me.” He gave her a hard look. “Is that what you really believe, or what you want to believe?” 116
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“I do trust you.” She suddenly realized that she really did. He seemed to understand her better than she understood herself. “Good.” He kissed her gently. “Now, tell me what you’re afraid of. And, little one, that is an order.” “Dom mode again, huh?” “Yes. So, remember what that means,” he said firmly. She didn’t answer for a long moment. “Remember yesterday when you figured out that I was testing you?” When he nodded, she continued. “I’m afraid that I’ll do that again. And that you won’t forgive me.” He smiled. “I expect that you will test me, Cassie. Hell, I’ll probably test you, too. I’m not saying that I’ll be happy when you do, but it certainly won’t chase me away from you. Not even close. The only thing I’ll do is what I did yesterday. I’ll flip you over my lap and bust your ass for you. Eventually, you’ll come to realize that you can trust me, and won’t need to test me. You’ll figure out that when you want your bottom spanked, that a little bratting will probably get you what you want. And, sometimes, you’ll get spanked just because I want to spank you. I won’t always have a reason for it. That’s something that you agree to as a sub. But, since you like being spanked, I don’t see that as a problem. The difference is—you’ll also get spankings like you got yesterday, ones that you won’t like. Each and every time you test me, how bout that’s what we’ll do? I’ll take you into the study and give you a spanking, something along the lines of what I did yesterday. I can make sure that you don’t want it repeated very often, Cassie. I’ve told you, I can be a real SOB in full Dom mode. The main reason for that isn’t that I’m pissed off, or that I’m getting even. The reason will be because it’s what you need to not feel guilty afterward.” “So, you won’t be mad?” He shrugged. “I might. I’ve got a temper if pushed far enough. But, I won’t want you to go, and I won’t ever lay a hand on you when I’m really angry.” He studied her for a long moment. “I might even get angry enough that I don’t spank you for whatever it is you’ve done.” “I don’t understand.” He realized that he hadn’t explained this part to her. “I might be a Dom, Cassie, but I’m a man first. If you have seriously pissed me off, it will not be settled with a spanking. We’ll talk about it, and find a way to resolve it. But that way just might be that your punishment is just no punishment.” 117
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She frowned at that. “So, you’d just leave me feeling guilty?” “Exactly. Then, eventually, once I thought you’d really learned something from whatever it was—only then would I put you over my knee.” “What about if I’m angry with you?” “What about it? Of course you’ll get angry with me. Probably a lot more often than I’ll be angry with you—at least while you and I are learning about each other. There will be things that I’ll say or do that you don’t understand, and I won’t explain it till I’m damn well good and ready. That’ll irritate you.” She nodded. “Yes, it probably will.” “Oh, I’ll eventually explain, but probably on my timetable, not yours.” “Just so you don’t get angry if I get angry.” He grinned. “I might, honey, but I won’t get angry because you’re angry, but that doesn’t mean that you won’t get a hot seat. And not the ones you like, either.” “I sort of like both kinds,” she admitted. “Of course you do. But what you shouldn’t like is knowing that you’ve disappointed us both and earned it.” Okay, so maybe he did know how to explain to her. “No, I didn’t like knowing you were disappointed in me,” she admitted. “That’s why any spanking in my study is intense, why I’m intense, and yeah, even seem cold. I compensate for the things that you do like with things that I hope you don’t. That’s what turns a spanking into a punishment. It’s not the amount of spanking, it’s the mindset you enter it with.” He kissed her again, gently. “Even though I don’t give those kinds of spankings often—you’ll probably get quite a few while we are learning about each other. I really did spank you harder and longer at your house than I did in the study. It’s the intensity that makes it harder for the sub.” “Ok.” It had seemed a lot harder than he’d spanked her at the house, though. “Just ok? I want to know what’s going on in that pretty head of yours, Cassie. Tell me what you’re thinking.” He forced her to meet his gaze, lifting her chin with gentle fingers. He saw that her eyes were damp and sighed. “Tell me.” “I didn’t want to upset you.” She couldn’t shake that part of her that worried he wouldn’t want her if he was upset with her. “I’m not upset, honey.” 118
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“But you will be if you decide you need to do a study punishment.” “Nope, but you probably will. Me? I’ll get to spank your cute ass.” He’d already explained that he wouldn’t necessarily want to do it, even though he still would. She grinned. “Not if I talk you out of it.” Brandon laughed. Her eyes weren’t troubled any longer. He’d apparently gotten through, and the imp was back. Damn, but he loved her. “There is that,” he agreed. And, sometimes, he’d let her do just that—if she really didn’t need spanked. “I love you,” she said simply and hugged him. She pulled his head down and kissed him, her tongue teasing his lips apart. “But you’ve got your work cut out for you,” she warned. “I can’t wait,” he said with a smile. “So, tell me, have you shown me your worst punishment?” she asked. “No.” He paused a moment. “Does that worry you?” “A little,” she admitted. “But it’s probably supposed to.” “No two punishments are exactly the same. Some won’t even end with just one spanking. I really did mean it when I said that I could give you a spanking you wouldn’t soon forget.” “That’s ok. I’ll still love you if you do.” “Someday, sweetheart, we’ll end up testing that theory. But as long as you know that I will love you no matter what, we’ll get past it.” And, she would have to test it, he knew. He wondered how long it would take before she did.
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Chapter Eleven Over the next two days, they spent every minute together, making love, playing with each other, and learning about each other. He’d told her about his parents and about the accident that had killed him; which had ultimately led to his becoming a police officer. They talked about his writing. He explained that he was taking a break before working on his next book. He didn’t add that he’d just decided that today. He wanted to devote their free time to her. She had been careful just how much she told him; afraid to be too open with him too soon. Part of her was still afraid that this was a weekend fling for him; even though he’d assured her that was not the case. Part of her knew she wasn’t being fair. He’d talked to her a lot, and she’d told him very little. Sunday evening, Cassie was moody. She knew the cause. She didn’t want to go home. But, Brandon had said nothing about her staying with him. She was trying to convince herself that he wouldn’t change his mind about wanting her to be with him, but why hadn’t he said anything? Brandon had been called out by a friend a couple of hours before. Bored, she got on the Internet and started looking for D/s information sites. Most of them really didn’t give her very good information; at least not information that applied to her and Brandon. She’d even read some personal ads that had literally nauseated her. Some of the things that the so-called Masters wanted to do to slaves disgusted her. Eventually, she found her way into a chat room. It was another D/s room, and for a long while, she just parked in the room and watched what was going on. The Doms were mostly idiots. They did quite a few scenes in the room, which she watched in total fascination, though. Some of the subs in the room were treated really badly. She wanted to say something, but knew that she shouldn’t; it would annoy Brandon. Soon, though, she got a private message. A Dom demanding that she do a scene with him. Cassie politely replied that she was taken, and couldn’t. But he was persistent. Even when she left the room, he continued to message her, making obscene comments now. She finally remembered what Brandon had said about Internet Providers and realized that he was local. She knew she should just get off the 120
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Internet and not argue with him, but didn’t. He was really pissing her off, and she told him where to go, and gave him directions, then closed the window and shut off the computer. She wondered if perhaps he was the bastard terrorizing women, and briefly considered getting back on the computer. She realized too, that Brandon was not going to be happy with her. Brandon was standing in front of her when she lifted her head. She hadn’t even heard him come in. “Got bored, huh?” he asked with a smile. “Yeah. Just thought I’d do a little research.” Well, that was true as far as it went. “Find anything interesting?” he asked, still smiling. Now, why did she look so guilty? He had the feeling she’d been doing something she didn’t want him to know about. She shook her head a moment, then sighed. “You’re gonna be pissed.” “Why? What did you do?” he asked. He came around the desk and looked down at her. “Umm, do I have to tell you?” His voice hardened. “Yes, Cassandra, you do.” She knew that look and tone already. “I—I went to a chat room,” she admitted. “You don’t need permission to go to a chat room, Cassie.” She didn’t look relieved, though. “Ok, what else did you do?” “Some guy messaged me. I sort of got into an argument with him.” “Why?” “He was a jerk. When I realized that he was a local ISP, I told him where to go and disconnected.” “Why didn’t you just disconnect when he messaged you?” he asked, crossing his arms over his chest. She knew that she’d risked her safety, and they had discussed it. Cassie sighed. “Because he pissed me off.” “Oh, I see. So, since he pissed you off, it was perfectly ok to put yourself at risk?” Utoh, she thought. He’s not happy. “Well…” “Well, what?” he snapped. “You know that there is a psychopath out there and that an ISP can be traced. What the hell were you thinking?” “I guess I wasn’t thinking,” she admitted. “But, I am a cop, you know.” 121
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“Exactly, damn it. And we talked about using an untraceable ISP. We aren’t even going to discuss this right now, Cassandra. Go to the corner, and don’t come out or speak to me until I say so.” “But…” Brandon snagged her up by the arms. He turned her around quickly and smacked her bottom hard. “Go!” he growled. Cassie didn’t try to say anything else. She looked at his hard face and walked over to the corner. Oh man, she thought, he was pissed. Seriously pissed. She didn’t dare open her mouth again. Although, since she knew he wouldn’t spank her when he was mad, she almost considered it. The last time he’d spanked her, he hadn’t been angry. How different would it be when he so obviously was? Brandon walked over to her and moved her closer to the wall, till her nose touched it. “Don’t move, young lady.” He walked out of the study. Ok, so she’d managed to really piss him off, and sooner than he thought she would. He went to the bedroom and paced. He needed to cool down before he said another word to her. She knew how dangerous it was. Once more, her fiery temper had gotten her into trouble. Only this time, he was most definitely pissed off. He checked his watch. Well, he thought, we’ll see how she likes a half hour in that damn corner. If he wasn’t calm by then, he’d wait till tomorrow to bust her ass—but bust it he would. And just then, he didn’t care if she’d have to spend an entire day wondering what he was going to do. In fact, he was pissed off enough to do exactly that. Within ten minutes, he’d calmed down considerably. Still, his little Cassie was most certainly going to think twice before she acted again. He couldn’t think of anything that he considered more serious than her risking herself. She’d been warned about the internet, and the ISP. Getting into an argument with someone on the net wasn’t a smart thing to do. Of course, that’s how he’d met her, and he was happy about that. Still, her temper could have dangerous consequences. He sat down on the bed and considered what he was going to do. He’d have to make sure that the spanking she got was one that she really wouldn’t forget any time soon. He opened his closet and looked up at the shelf. He took out a thin wooden paddle and went back to the study. Cassie wouldn’t know it, but the small thin paddle wouldn’t bruise like the brush could with prolonged use, at least not if he was very careful, and he would be. But it 122
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looked worse, it was larger than the brush. The varnish made it sting like the very devil, though. He went back to the study. He checked his watch again. “Come here, Cassandra.” He was sitting on the couch, the paddle sitting in plain view next to him. Cassie turned around slowly. She kept reminding herself that he loved her, and that he would still love her when he was done whatever he planned to do. She stood in front of him. “Yes, Sir.” Well, he thought, she’d learned that much at least. “I want you to stand there and tell me if there is any good reason that I shouldn’t pick up this paddle and whale the daylights out of you.” She wished she could think of one, but couldn’t. In hindsight, it had been foolish. “No, Sir.” He’d expected her to argue, or at least try and defend herself. The fact that she didn’t, drained his remaining irritation. “Then, tell me what you were thinking, young lady.” That was just the thing; she hadn’t been thinking at all. Although, as she’d sat there arguing, she had known that if Brandon had found out, she’d be in for it. “I wasn’t really thinking, Sir,” she admitted softly. This was not how he’d planned on spending their last day together before they both had to go back to work in the morning. Damn it! “All right, Cassie. This is how this is going to work. We both have to work tomorrow. What shift are you working?” “Days,” she whispered. He nodded. “Yeah, me too.” He paused, studying her. “I warned you that if you did something so incredibly stupid that I was likely to bring you in here every night for at least a week. Do you remember me telling you that?” “Yes Sir.” “Right now, I’m considering whether or not to do just that. So, what we do here now may or may not be the end of this.” “Yes Sir,” she said. She couldn’t really argue. She’d been warned. She wasn’t about to argue with him when he looked so angry. “It’s almost eight o’clock. I don’t want to spend the rest of our evening together busting your butt, but don’t make any plans for the next hour.” She gulped. “Yes, Sir. And then what?” she whispered. “What do you mean?” “Are you taking me home, then?”
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He shook his head. “Not unless you ask me to. I’d planned on dropping you off in the morning in time to get your car for work. Is that all right with you?” “Of course.” It was fine with her. At least he’d spend the night holding her. “I love you, sweetheart. Remember that.” He picked up the paddle. “Now, can you remember to keep your hands out of the way, or should I begin by strapping your hands.” “I’ll remember not to put them back, Sir,” she said quietly. He looked at her, considering. “Bend over the arm of the couch, Cassandra,” he ordered. Cassie nodded. “Yes, Sir,” she whispered. She moved to the arm of the couch and bent over, resting her arms under her chest. Brandon stood and walked behind her. “You had better remember this, young lady.” He drew back the thin paddle and swung it hard, connecting with her jean-clad bottom in a resounding smack. He didn’t spank her fast, though. He wanted to make sure she felt each and every smack. “I will not be disobeyed like this again.” He swatted again. “Do you understand me?” He swatted her bottom again, low. “Y-yes, Sir!” she said quickly. Her legs were shaking now, but she didn’t try and get up. It seemed like the paddle covered her entire bottom with each smack. How many was he going to give her? He swatted her again, and she lifted her bottom, and winced. “Oww,” she cried. He wasn’t fazed. He knew that this paddle didn’t really do more than sting. It was more the intensity of the situation. “I guess you are feeling it,” he said, swatting her again. But, he did put his hand on her back, a subtle reminder to keep in place. He swatted her two more times. She kicked her legs, but didn’t put her hands back or move, other than kicking her legs. He gave her three more swats with it, waiting almost a full minute between each one. Cassie had started to cry after the fourth swat. “You can stand up, Cassandra,” he said softly. She stood up slowly. She badly wanted to rub her burning bottom, but didn’t. She stood looking at him. His eyes were hard, and his jaw tensed. She gulped, but didn’t say anything. “Lose the jeans, young lady,” he ordered, making himself ignore her tear-streaked face.
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Cassie’s hands moved to her waist. Like her legs, they were shaking as she unfastened the jeans. He waited while she folded them and sat them on the edge of the couch. There was one wooden chair in the room. He pointed to it. “Have a seat.” She gave him a curious look, then walked to the chair and sat on it, then winced. Sitting was not comfortable! He saw the wince. “You will sit there until I tell you to get up. And no wiggling, either. I want that butt firmly planted. Understand?” “Yes, Sir.” She was still crying softly, but she knew that those tears weren’t going to stop him any time soon. She’d made her bed, and would have to lie in it. Brandon sat back down on the couch, watching her for a long moment. “Are you getting angry?” he asked. She shook her head. “No, sir” she whispered. That surprised him a little. Apparently, she did understand that she’d asked for exactly what she was getting. He hadn’t held back much on those swats. “What are you thinking?” he demanded. She looked him directly in the eye. “That I’m sorry.” He nodded. “I’m sure you are, Cassie. Is that all you are thinking about?” “Just that I hope you’ll forgive me.” Brandon sighed. “It’s not a matter of forgiving you, Cassie. You know that. Once this is over, it’s over. We can discuss that if you want, though.” “I shouldn’t have disobeyed you. But I want you to know that I didn’t plan it.” “I didn’t really think you had. That’s the problem, you didn’t think at all. You reacted instead of using that brain of yours. All you had to do was tell the jerk that you weren’t allowed to talk to Doms, and close the window. Your temper got the best of you, right?” “Yes Sir,” she admitted, lowering her eyes, unable to meet his gaze. He wasn’t going to let her get away with that. “Look at me, Cassandra!” Cassie lifted her eyes. “I’m sorry.” Her bottom was stinging less now, and she relaxed a little bit. “I really am.” “I don’t want you to keep apologizing, Cassie. I know you’re sorry, and by the time I’m done, you will promise never to do anything like this again,” he promised. 125
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Her eyes darkened, but she didn’t say anything. Good girl, he thought. She was learning. He doubted that he’d need to repeat this particular lesson again. At least not for any Internet shit. “Now, get the brush and come here.” She gulped. Paddle and brush? “Yes, Sir.” She got the bath brush out of his bag and brought it to him. He took the brush and sat it next to him. “Over my lap, little one,” he said, his tone in definite Dom mode. It was a tone that he knew she responded to. He pulled her up, so her body was resting on the couch, but let her keep her legs on the floor. “Give me your right hand,” he ordered. That was the only one that she could really reach back, and he was going to make sure that she didn’t—especially with the brush. “I won’t put it back.” He didn’t bother answering. He just took her hand off his leg and held it at her waist, using it and his arm to hold her in place. He lifted the brush and looked down at her bottom. It was still warm from the paddling he’d already given her. But, he lifted the brush and started spanking her with it. Not as hard as he had with the paddle, though. Again, he spanked slow, but kept the brush moving, not swatting the same spot more than twice in a row, as that was the best way to keep from bruising her. “Am I going to have to do this again?” he demanded between swats. “N-no, Sir,” she cried. She couldn’t keep her legs still, or move out of this position. “Please, please, stop for a minute.” He gave her five more hard smacks, then rested the brush on her bottom. She was crying hard. But hell, he’d warned her, damn it. Her bottom was red now. He knew he probably should just let her bottom keep burning, but he rubbed her bottom gently for a moment. “I love you, Cassandra. Don’t make me do this again.” He sat the brush aside, then spanked with his hand, rapid spanks, moving all over her bottom and upper thighs. Cassie was close to begging him to stop, but he didn’t. Her legs were kicking wildly, and she tried to pull her hand free, but couldn’t. “I’ll be good,” she promised over and over. “I’ll be good.” Brandon lightened the smacks, but didn’t stop. “I certainly hope so, for your sake,” he muttered darkly His hand continued to rise and fall, the slaps loud in the room. Her legs were kicking wildly, but he continued to spank. 126
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“Please, I can’t take anymore,” she sobbed. “Please stop,” she finally begged. . He gave her a final four hard smacks on each cheek, then stopped, “I love you, but if you ever do something like this again, we’ll be right back here again.” He released her hand, but didn’t let her up just yet. “Still love me?” he asked quietly. “Y-yes,” she sobbed. “I’m sorry I asked you to stop.” Brandon flipped her over and sat her up on his lap. “Don’t be sorry for asking me to stop. I’d have been surprised if you hadn’t. I just gave you one hell of a spanking, love.” Now that he was done, he hugged her and then brushed away her tears. He’d been hard on her. Still, she needed to understand that when being punished, he didn’t expect her to be stoic and silent. “I don’t expect you to be spanked and keep silent. I wanted to get your attention. Guess I did, huh?” Her bottom was on fire. He’d certainly gotten her attention. “Yes, Sir.” He smiled gently, brushing her riotous hair off her cheeks. “You don’t have to say sir anymore tonight, sweetheart. Your punishment is over.” “Forgive me?” She looked up at him and waited for him to respond. “Of course.” “So, umm, are you going to spank me every night for a week?” Her heart raced as she waited for his answer. It hadn’t been unbearable, but hadn’t been pleasant either! “I don’t think so. Not if you’ve really learned your lesson. But I warn you now, don’t even think about doing this again, or we’ll have a repeat of tonight.” “Ok,” she shuddered, and leaned her head on his hard chest, curling her fist against his chest. “I won’t.” Brandon hugged her. “So now you know,” he whispered. “Know what?” she asked curiously. “That I can be a real son of a bitch during a spanking.” She smiled up at him. “No you weren’t.” “No?” It really amazed him that she could smile at him less than five minutes after he’d given her a major spanking. God, he loved her. She shook her head. “Not when I know why you did it.” “Care to explain?” he asked. Perhaps she really did understand him better than he’d given her credit for. If there had been any doubt is his mind that she was a sub, there was little now. 127
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Cassie touched his face, then picked up his hand and kissed his palm. It was as red as her bottom, and likely just as sore. “Because you love me,” she said simply. “And because you were scared when you thought about what could happen.” So, she did understand. He hugged her tightly. “Yeah, that pretty much sums it up. But I am sorry that it was necessary.” Her bottom was still on fire. “Me too,” she grumbled. He smiled gently. “Pretty tender, huh?” Cassie nodded. “Yeah.” Brandon lifted her and carried her out of the study and back into his room. He stood her next to the bed. “Wait for me,” he said softly. Cassie watched as he walked into the bathroom. She couldn’t get enough of watching him. He was so strong. Her bottom certainly stung, but she wasn’t hurt; not really. She really did love his body—everything about it. She heard water running, and was curious, but waited. Brandon came back in carrying a washcloth. “Lie down on your stomach, sweetheart.” She did as he asked, folding her arms under her chin. She felt him run the cool cloth over her tender bottom, easing the sting. She sighed and relaxed, enjoying the gentle ministrations. Brandon frowned at his handiwork. Her bottom was beet red, and her upper thighs were pink. He’d spanked her a long time. “Cassie?” She turned and looked over at him. “Yes?” “Are you sure you’re ok?” “I’m fine, Brandon.” But that didn’t mean she wanted to do much sitting right now. “I love you, little one. Please don’t make me do that again.” Because as bad as he felt about it, he would if she endangered herself again. “I’ll try not to, Brandon.” Brandon sat the cloth aside, then lay down next to her. He pulled her over him, his hand gently caressing her back, bottom, and thighs. Her damn the torpedoes nature could get her seriously hurt, and he didn’t think he could stand it if she was hurt. “Do more than try, Cassie. I want you to promise that you won’t endanger yourself again.” “I can’t promise,” she whispered. “Damn it,” he muttered. “I don’t like hurting you.” 128
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“I know.” She did know. “I won’t intentionally put myself in danger; you have my word about that. But I can’t promise not to act without thinking. I’m sorry.” He sighed. “Then I can’t promise that this won’t eventually be repeated,” he snapped. “Perhaps I should do this every night for a week.” “Is that what you want to do?” she asked, looking at him intently. He sighed. “No. But I’m wondering if you’ve learned a damn thing tonight.” “I learned, I just can’t promise not to do something stupid again”. She touched her burning bottom. “But, I’ll definitely think twice.” “That’s all I can ask, I suppose. Ok, sweetheart, I’ll accept that.” “You’re angry?” “No, not angry. I was earlier, I admit that. That’s why you spent so long in the corner. But, I’d stopped being angry before I ever walked into my study. By then, I was just determined to give you a spanking you wouldn’t forget.” “Oh, I don’t think I’ll forget it,” she muttered with a small pout. “Good,” he said sternly. “I don’t want you to.” She looked at him again. “You really don’t like giving punishment spankings, do you?” He considered that. “I’ve told you I like spanking, and I’ll admit that sometimes I just like to spank hard, too. That’s what warm-ups are for. But hurting you? No, I don’t like that. But that won’t stop me from doing so if I think you need it. It’s complicated.” Her eyes darkened. “So, if you think you need to punish me often, you’ll start to resent me.” He patted her bottom. “No, if spanking you isn’t effective, I’ll do something different. Remember? I told you that sometimes I wouldn’t spank you. Sometimes, that is the worse punishment.” “Hmmm, so someday I might get to the point that I won’t get spanked if you’re displeased?” “Oh no, love. But I might wait a week or two to do it.” “So, I’d just have to wait and wonder when you’d decide to do it?”
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‘Yes.” He was curious what kind of an attitude she’d get when he used that particular method. He could see the war and grinned to himself. He could hardly wait.
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Chapter Twelve Brandon and Cassie spent all their free time together over the next several weeks, whenever they weren’t working. He spanked her a few times as small punishments, but mostly they had all been fun playful spankings. Some harder than others, and she discovered that she liked even the hard ones, especially when she was really turned on. They’d talked for hours and hours. Most of the time, they got along great, although they had had a few arguments. Mostly, about things at work, though. He didn’t like her plan for catching the sadistic psychopath, and told her so. “Cassie, I still don’t like it. I don’t want you to try and catch this bastard alone. Damn it, you aren’t the only damn officer on the department.” “I told you, Brandon that I was going after this jerk. If you want to be around when I try and get him, fine, but I am going to do it. I’ve spent hours in that damn chat room trying to pick him out.” Brandon hadn’t liked that, either, but partly because he didn’t like other guys hitting on her. “So, what’s the plan?” he asked, glaring at her. “You going to sit on the computer and see how many weirdoes you can find?” Cassie glared right back. “If I have to, yes! I thought you understood that my job is important to me!” “Damn it, I do understand that! But that damn well doesn’t mean that I have to like the way you’re going about it on this thing,” he snapped. He’d been sitting next to her, but now stood and paced. “Why are you angry?” she demanded. “Upset because I haven’t given you a good reason to bust my ass?” It was way out of line, and she knew it, but she was furious. It suddenly dawned on her though, that she was angry that he hadn’t. But, she wasn’t going to tell him that! He’d given her a couple of small punishments, true, but when she’d pushed him, he hadn’t, and that worried her. It made her wonder if he just didn’t consider her worth the effort. He stopped pacing and walked over to her very slowly. “That’s one, Cassandra,” he warned darkly. “One what?” she demanded, not caring that she should tread carefully right now. 131
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“Your one and only warning—do not use our D/s relationship as a means to try and end an argument with me.” He gave her a hard look. “You don’t want me in Dom mode right now, trust me!” When they argued about anything, she said things he didn’t think she meant. So far, for the most part, he’d let her get away with it. Perhaps that had been a mistake. Sometimes the only way she’d really talk to him was after a blow up. He needed to teach her a better way, although part of him did realize that she either tested him or felt safe enough with him to not fear retribution. She always felt guilty after these scenes, though. Did she? She asked herself that as she looked up into his penetrating eyes. “Why not?” “Cassandra, I am not in the mood to play. If you continue in this vein, you’ll get exactly what you’re asking for,” he warned. He knelt down in front of her and took her face in his hands, gently. “Be very sure you want to go there before you open that beautiful mouth of yours. You’ve been trying to push my buttons, and I’ve expected you to, but this isn’t one you want to push.” Part of the reason he hadn’t spanked her when she did this was because he knew she wanted to make sure it was safe. He’d told her that sometimes not spanking her was the punishment; but perhaps that was the wrong tact with her. She was submissive, but she was also a strong woman with a streak of insecurity. Had not spanking her made her feel guiltier? He’d tried to be very careful for what he spanked her for. Maybe he needed to spank her immediately, so she didn’t need to act out to attempt to push him into a spanking. “Why not?” she demanded. “I know damn well you won’t touch me if you’re pissed at me.” Brandon lowered his hands to her arms and pulled her to her feet. “You are so right,” he snapped. “Be glad of that!” He shook her gently. “Damn it, Cassie. What the hell are you playing at?” She wasn’t going to back down. “Like you said, pushing buttons.” He let go of her arms. “Getting tired of me?” he asked carefully. Was she resenting him? If so, punishing her was going to make matters worse, not better. “No, Brandon,” she said honestly. “I’m not getting tired of you. Why? Gonna walk because I’m not being the good little sub right now?” He shook his head impatiently. “Of course not, Cassie. But I want to know what’s going on in that head of yours.” He sat back 132
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down and pulled her down onto his lap. “Talk to me, sweetheart,” he said gently. “Why are you being nice?” she asked petulantly. “Because something is bothering you, and I want to know what it is,” he said, tilting her chin up and making her look at him. He tried to read her eyes, but couldn’t this time. They were troubled, though. “I don’t know. I guess I’m just frustrated with this case.” “Hmm. So, you figured you’d vent a little frustration with me?” “I guess.” Well, he didn’t particularly like it, but he nodded. “Ok. Feel better now?” She sighed now. “No.” “Cassie we can argue and fight. But there are some cards you don’t want to play. This was one of them, and I told you it was.” “I know. What are you going to do?” she asked. “Nothing until we talk about it.” “Too pissed, huh?” she asked. Actually, he was calming down. “Not really, no. Actually, right about now, I’d like to vent a little frustration of my own on your cute ass. But, I’m also not going to spank you right now.” “Why not?” “Because neither of us is in the right frame of mind.” “Oh? And it matters what frame of mind I’m in when you decide I should be spanked?” she demanded hotly; her anger ruling her better judgment once more. “Yes,” he said simply. She was still trying to piss him off. “Your frame of mind matters a great deal.” She got off his lap and paced. “Damn it, I know.” She really was frustrated. Oh, he knew he had to punish her for this little episode, but not right now. “Ok, love, we’ll get back to the things you said and address them later. But for now, let’s see if you can vent a little more in a more constructive way.” That was all the warning she got before he pulled her across his lap and started to spank her. It was simply to let her vent. “For the next five minutes, say whatever you want with no repercussions,” he said, as he continued to spank. “Damn it, stop spanking me!” she tried to reach her hand back, but he simply held it out of the way, then continued to spank her. “I don’t want spanked right now!” 133
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“Tough,” he said companionably. His hand continued to rise and fall, even as she kicked and squirmed. It wouldn’t take long for her to break, and she really needed to. “Damn, damn, damn. I said stop it!” “And I said no.” He just continued to spank her. He wasn’t even spanking her hard, but he didn’t stop, despite her demands. Cassie continued to swear for several minutes, but finally, she stopped kicking. After a few more minutes, she started to cry. “I’m sorry.” Brandon stopped immediately. He turned her over and held her until she’d stopped crying. “Feeling better?” She nodded. “I was a bitch.” “No, not a bitch. I love you, you know.” “I know,” she said. And she’d used that knowledge against him; used him to vent her frustration. “Why do you put up with me?” “Cause you’re cute,” he said with a small smile. “And I love you.” “I’m serious. That wasn’t fair. I was using you.” “Yup,” he agreed. “And you pushed buttons you shouldn’t have pushed. Eventually, we’ll address that. But for now, I just want to hold you, ok?” “Wanna make love?” she asked. “Always,” he said with a grin. “I love your body.” “You do, huh?” she asked, touching his hard cheek. “Oh yeah.” But, as he looked at her, he knew she wasn’t telling him something. “What are you thinking?” “I’m thinking that you’re pretty pissed off,” she muttered. He shrugged. “I was, yes. Not so much now, though.” Although he’d never admit it, spanking her, even when he wasn’t punishing her, had gone a long way to alleviate his own rising temper. That part of D/s worked both ways. He’d have never touched her those first few minutes though—he had been too angry. “So, tell me something, Cassie.” She looked at him warily. “What?” “How did you vent frustration before you had me around to bust your ass for you?” he asked seriously. “I didn’t vent it. I just seethed.” “Ahh, I see. Well, then I guess spanking your cute ass is a better method.” He grinned. “You are so adorable, sweetheart. Even when you piss me off, even when you’re pushing me, even when you’re mad as hell.” 134
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“I wanted you to spank me, Brandon,” she admitted. He grinned again. “Yeah, it took me a minute, but I figured it out. I wish you’d just asked me, though. Before you said things that I hope you didn’t mean.” “No, I didn’t mean them,” she admitted. “And we will be addressing that,” he assured her. “But not right now.” She gulped. “Are you going to punish me for it?” “Wasn’t that why you did it?” he asked gently. “When?” “When you’re ready to discuss it, and deal with it. But you’re not there yet.” “How can you know that?” she asked softly. “It’s just a feeling, I guess. And, in part, it’s because I’ve come to know you in the last couple of weeks. I want to talk about your motivations when you’ve had some time to think about it.” He touched her cheek. “I want you to be able to tell me exactly why you brought D/s into an argument. If it’s because you resent me, then we need to discuss it.” “I don’t know why,” she admitted. He nodded. “I know you don’t right now. But I want you to understand, so you can make me understand.” He needed to make sure that she wasn’t having doubts about them. Rather, about a D/s relationship. It was quite possible for one to actually enjoy being spanked, and not like D/s. He needed to be sure that she wanted both relationships with him, because if she didn’t—he could handle that. He wanted her regardless of the relationship dimensions. He considered just asking her, but didn’t want her to say she wanted to be a sub if she didn’t. “I was just angry, Brandon. I want to be with you. And I like all I’m learning about D/s. I just don’t handle temper well. I can be really mean, and I’m sorry.” “Are you sure that’s all it was, Cassie?” “Yes. It didn’t have anything to do with our relationship. I—I figured if I pushed, you’d spank me.” “Do you still want to be a sub, Cassie? You don’t have to be my sub to be the woman I love. I can’t promise that I won’t go Dom on you, but I can’t and won’t enforce it if it’s not something that you want, too.” “I like being spanked, you know that.” He shook his head. “There is a lot more to D/s than spanking, Cassie. It involves many levels of interaction. Part of which is 135
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understanding that I do, as a Dom, expect you to show respect and to think before you act. But, at the same time, those are things that are included in any relationship, and it’s a two way street. You deserve respect, and need to know that I’ve thought through any reactions I might have. But, it also means that ultimately, you trust me to make the best decisions when you either can’t or don’t. We can discuss them, of course, but unless you have a convincing argument, you likely won’t change my mind.” “I do understand that,” she insisted. “Good. But we are not going to settle every argument with me spanking you when or if you start getting sassy with me. Not if we are arguing about something totally non D/s related. In other words, I’m hoping that soon you will learn not to throw D/s up into my face as a means of venting when you’re frustrated. You’re an adult; you should be able to ask for what you want and need.” “Maybe this isn’t going to work, Brandon.” She climbed off his lap and turned toward the fireplace. “I tried to tell you that I don’t do relationships well. I have too much of a temper, and I scare everyone away.” He was by her side in an instant, and turned her with gentle hands. “Is that what you think? That you are in danger of chasing me off every time you say or do something to make me angry?” Cassie looked up into his eyes. God, it was as if they could see into her very soul. “Probably.” “Still testing me?” he asked softly. “I—I don’t think so,” she said. “Honey, if you just got mad and used the first thing that came to your mind, then this is pretty simple. I’ll bust your ass for the attitude, and we’ll move on. But if it’s something different…if it’s that you resent being pushed into D/s, then the last thing you need is punished.” As unsure as Cassie was of herself—not her love for Brandon, or even her decision about D/s—but her own ability to succeed in a relationship—she hadn’t meant to make him doubt himself. She’d managed in a few careless words to hurt him, even if he wasn’t admitting it. “I was just angry. I don’t resent you at all. I feel like I’m finding myself for the first time, understanding myself.” Brandon smiled and his eyes lightened. “I must admit, that’s good to hear. Of course, it’s going to cost you a sore bottom, but I’m glad to hear it.” 136
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She grinned. “Somehow, I don’t think I’ll mind the sore bottom so much.” He shook his head. “Ah, love. You will mind it. And that’s ok. But during it, if I hear one word about my using D/s to get even—I promise you, I will stop, and it will be the last time for a long time that you get spanked for the same thing again.” Her eyes darkened, and he continued. “I’m not going to let you use D/s as a means to try and push buttons, not when you know which ones to push.” “Ok,” she whispered. “So, now, you have to decide whether you want to get it over with, or if you want me to make love with you first.” “Which would you rather do?” she asked. “In all honesty? Make love to you first. I think I’d feel a lot better. On the other hand, you’ll probably be too nervous to really enjoy it—and I really don’t want to make love to you with a punishment hanging over you, because when we make love, we are not Dom and sub, we are a man and a woman.” “Then would you spank me, Sir?” she asked. Brandon nodded stiffly. “You know what to do,” he ordered. Cassie nodded and went to the study and to the corner. She knew that was exactly where he expected to find her. Once in the corner, she took off her jeans and sat them on the desk. Well, she had no one to blame but herself. She had asked him to help her with her quick temper. She should have known when enough was enough. Part of it had been that he had barely touched her in the last couple of weeks, and she felt neglected. But part of it too was that she needed to know that if she lost her temper, that he’d spank her and then they’d be okay again. Brandon sat back down in the living room. He wasn’t sure really what to do. Part of him really didn’t think it was a good idea to spank her for this, but he didn’t really see an alternative. Not at this juncture of their relationship. Should he give her a very real spanking, or just a shorter reminder? He chuckled to himself. What would she think if she knew that part of the reason she was waiting was because he wasn’t sure what the hell to do? Hell, he had warned her to stop, and the few short reminders he’d administered obviously hadn’t worked. “Well, Cassie, I guess I have my answer,” he said aloud in the empty room. He walked in the study and saw that she was exactly where he’d known she’d be. But he did wonder why she’d taken off her jeans already. She knew that he didn’t use the rubber paddle on a 137
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bare bottom; and, very few with the hairbrush. “So, you’re thinking of just a hand spanking?” he asked, looking at her white bottom. She always wore thongs when they were alone, because she knew he liked them. “Not really, Sir.” He got the thin wooden paddle out of their bag. “Yet, you know that I don’t use the rubber paddle on anything except jeans—and you know that there is a risk of bruising with my brush for a prolonged spanking.” “I know, but I thought maybe I deserved a few bruises.” Not in this lifetime, he thought darkly. “Come here, Cassie,” he said gently. Cassie walked over to him, her head lowered as she stood before him. “Look at me, young lady,” he ordered. Cassie lifted her eyes. She knew that they were damp, but she couldn’t help it. Brandon touched her cheek. “I’m not angry, sweetheart. You need to understand that before I do a thing.” “You should be,” she said, her tone weary. “But I’m not. So, if that’s what you’re thinking, I’m gonna lie you down on our bed and make love to you until you don’t believe that anymore. I don’t have a temper like yours. It’s not a quick one, and I don’t stay angry very long when I am. Instead, I resort to Dom mode.” “I know, Sir.” He sat down on the couch and pulled her onto his lap. “So, what are we going to do, little one?” “You’re going to punish me.” “Not if you think I’m angry, I’m not.” “I just think you should be, not that you are,” she pointed out. “All right, Cassandra, then let’s get this over with.” He flipped her over on his lap. “Legs on the floor, Cassie. And you damn well keep those hands out of my way.” His voice was hard. “I will, Sir,” she whispered. It still amazed her how easily he could change from easygoing to mega-Dom in an instant. Brandon looked at the paddle and sighed. He raised his hand and started spanking. He spanked her fast, not missing one inch of her tender bottom and upper thighs. He knew just how much strength to use, and used it well—stinging smacks that would have her wishing she had a pillow to sit on. He paused long enough to pick up the paddle. 138
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Cassie had been crying before he’d even started, but she was crying harder now. He was spanking her hard, but she knew she deserved it. His hand tightened around her waist when she started kicking her legs. She almost asked him to stop, but caught herself. He was spanking slower with the paddle, and each stroke seared into her flesh. Brandon continued to paddle her. “I sure as hell hope you remember this, young lady,” he growled low. A minute later and she was crying so hard it was difficult to catch her breath. Only then did he pause. Her bottom was fiery red now and he sighed. She hadn’t asked him to stop—not once. That in itself surprised him. He rested his palm on her burning bottom. “Why haven’t you asked me to stop?” he asked gently, realizing that she wasn’t going to ask him to. He’d spanked her enough. “B-because I don’t deserve for you to stop. I told you I wouldn’t mind what you did.” There were times when a spanking didn’t serve its intended purpose—alleviating guilt. Apparently, this was one of those times, because he’d given her a serious spanking. She’d clearly had enough. “All right, young lady. Back to your corner.” He stood her to her feet and walked with her to the corner. “Stay put till I come back.” “I will,” she whispered. “I’m sorry.” Brandon stood behind her for a long moment. She was crying hard, and he hated it. She always cried, but not like this. Not like her heart was broken. “I know, love.” He touched her hair, running his hands through it. “I’ll be back in a little while.” Her bottom was so red, it had to burn like hell. He left her there and went back to the living room and sat down tiredly. Finally, after ten minutes, he went back into his study. Cassie’s head was leaning against the wall, her shoulders were slumped. “Come here, love,” he said gently. He sat on the couch and patted his lap. “Please don’t be nice,” she whispered. Her tears were silent ones now, but she was still obviously distraught. Ok. She still needed the Dom. “Cassandra, sit down, now.” She sat on his lap and let him hold her, then started crying all over again. “It’s not fair,” she cried. He pulled her back. “What isn’t?” he demanded. “You’re not supposed to be nice till you’re done.” 139
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He considered her tender bottom. He was done. “Is that for you to decide or for me, young lady?” “You, Sir,” she whispered. “Besides, I am done.” He held her close, kissing her tears away. “Now, be honest—are you ok?” She shook her head. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you.” He frowned. “So, since you hurt me, I get to hurt you back. Is that is?” “I hadn’t thought about it like that,” she said. She had no idea how much that relieved him. “Well, that’s good at least.” He held her for a long time. His hands running down her hair and across her back. He didn’t talk. He just held her and waited for her to calm down. When she finally had, he continued. “Now, tell me, were you just going to let me spank you, irregardless of what it was doing to you?” She nodded against his chest. “You were damn near hysterical, little one.” She shrugged. “It doesn’t matter.” He pulled her back, his hands on her arms tight and hard. “What the hell does that mean?” “I don’t want to lose you.” “You’re not going to lose me, Cassie. I love you, and I know you love me. But know what? As long as that is your frame of mind—I’m not about to spank you, I can guarantee it.” “Why?” He shook his head. Had he really done such a bad job explaining this to her? “Because, I’m supposed to be teaching you, not hurting you! I gauge when you’ve had enough spanking by your reactions to it. Now, I know that you are able to take one hell of a spanking, But damn it, it’s not about your letting me get even! I spank you for a lot of reasons. The biggest one is to give you what you need. But never is it about getting even.” He sat her on the couch, then paced, running his hand through his hair. “All right Cassie. New game plan. Unless and until I’m convinced that you aren’t going to submit to what could move past a simple punishment to a form of abuse, I’m not going to punish you by spanking you.” “So, you do want rid of me,” she said, sniffling. “Oh, little girl, you sorely tempt me to break my own rules and bust your ass, even pissed like I am, until you can’t think about a thing—other than having it end!” He lifted her up and shook her. “You should know better than that. But, damn it to hell, I have to 140
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be able to trust you to let me know when you’ve had enough. It’s imperative. You have to know that I couldn’t stand the thought of really hurting you. I’m tired of having you think I want rid of you if you piss me off. I won’t. But even that won’t make me want you any less. Your spirit is one of the things I love about you, damn it. So, find it again!” He shook her. “I mean it.” She pulled away from him and glared. “Damn you, I’m trying to do what you want! I don’t know how. I don’t know how!” She reached back her hand and slapped him. “There, does that do it?” He touched his cheek and grinned. “Exactly! I want that fire, Cassandra. I don’t want a damn doormat, and you aren’t one. If you were, we’d have played a little, had a little fun—but I sure as hell wouldn’t have fallen in love with you.” When he tried to pull her against him, she pounded on his chest with her fists. He let her pound on him for a few moments, and then held her wrists against his chest. “Feel better?” he asked. “Yes!” she shrieked. “Now, would you care to sit down and have a reasonable discussion?” he asked curiously. This was the Cassie he wanted, not some substitute she thought she should be to make him happy. “No!” He let go of her hands. “Then go and pout somewhere—just so you don’t leave the house,” he warned. “I’ll leave if I want to!” He sighed now. “No, you will not. It’s anger talking. Again. If you can’t sit down with me and have a reasonable discussion, I don’t want to talk to you until you can.” He walked over to the desk and took her car keys out of her purse, then looked at her. “Come find me when you can be reasonable again.” “Bastard!” He didn’t even bother answering her. He walked out of the study, slamming the door behind him. Well, he’d wanted the fire back. He wondered how long it would take her to calm down, then shrugged to himself. He had a little calming down of his own to do just then.
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Chapter Thirteen Cassie’s anger evaporated within a few minutes. She sat on the couch, exhausted, and winced. Hell, her ass still stung, and he’d only given her twenty swats with the paddle. It had stung, but his hand hurt. She wondered if he realized that it was worse than the paddle. He was right, of course. She’d have let him do whatever he wanted to her and not stopped him. Why was she so afraid she’d chase him away if she wasn’t perfect? She truly did like D/s. It was what she’d been missing and didn’t even know it. It was partly temper, she knew that. But that was what he was working on with her. Now, she knew he was pissed. She wondered if she should stay away from him a while or not. Then, she shook her head. “No, that’s the problem,” she said aloud. She wasn’t trusting him. He was angry, she was sure of it. But he loved her. She put her jeans back on and left the room. He was probably in the living room. She looked there first. He was standing in front of the fireplace, just staring at nothing. What had she done? “Brandon?” she asked softly. He turned to look at her. His blue eyes were piercing and angry. “What, Cassie?” She lifted her chin. “I know you’re angry.” He smiled grimly. “Good deduction.” He walked over to her and lifted her easily into his arms. He stomped through the house and into the bedroom, then tossed her lightly on the bed. “I’m assuming you really want to please me right now?” She nodded at once. “Yes.” He gave her a hard look. “Why?” “Because I love you,” she said simply. “I’ve been a bitch.” He didn’t agree or disagree. “Well, little girl. I’m pretty pissed, and I can’t seem to shake it. And, since I’m not leaving you alone, I figure a really good way to vent a little steam of my own is to take you to bed.” She gave him a slow smile. “Yes please. I love it when you make love to me.” Brandon kept his eyes on her and stripped quickly. He didn’t bother waiting for her to undress. He sat next to her and literally 142
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ripped the shirt open and unsnapped her bra. His hands moved to her waist. “Lift that tail, love.” Cassie’s heart was thudding, but it wasn’t with fear. It was anticipation. She lifted her hips and let him pull off her jeans and thong. Brandon saw the desire in her eyes. Yes, this was exactly what he wanted. Her passion. “Open for me,” he growled low. Again, he didn’t wait. He simply spread her legs wide and lay between them. “I meant what I said—I won’t punish you till I’m sure it’s safe. But I’m going to make love to you however I want—for as long as I want—whatever I want. Is that alright with you?” Her eyes darkened with desire. “God, yes,” she said huskily. “I want you.” He kissed her, then moved down and lowered his head between her legs, loving her with his mouth. He held her thighs apart and drank in the sweet essence of her. His tongue was driving her mad. He needn’t have held her legs apart; she had no desire to have him stop. She reached down and dug her fingers into his hair and held him to her. He lifted his head. “No, put you hands at you sides. It’s my turn.” He lowered his head again when she complied. When he felt that she was about to climax, he lifted his head and gently eased her back down, not letting her go over the edge yet. Cassie groaned. “God, you’re going to drive me insane, aren’t you?” “Yes.” Next, he moved up to her breasts, moving the material aside. He took one breast into the hot suction of his mouth and suckled hard, not asking for what he wanted, but taking it. His other hand moved between her spread thighs, caressing her almost roughly. He drove two fingers deeply inside her in one smooth thrust. He used his thumb to tease her at the same time. “Is it working” he asked when he’d lifted his head. “Yes!” She bucked as he drove her, trying to make him finish what he’d started. He grinned wickedly. “Not yet, little one. Not yet. Not for a long time.” He caressed her gently now, easing the tension that had built, only to start all over again. He moved up her body at last, finding her mouth with his own, letting her taste herself on his lips as he kissed her. He moved his fingers back between her thighs, once more bringing her to the edge, then again, bringing her back down “Can I touch you now?” she asked huskily. 143
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In answer, he held her arms over her head. He continued to use his mouth. Kissing her, then biting not quite gently on her neck. “Do you like this?” he said huskily. “Yes,” she whispered. Every nerve in her body was electrified. She wanted him to take her now, but knew he wouldn’t. Not until he was good and ready. So, she just let herself feel and absorb the sensations. Brandon continued to tease and torment her, and then finally let her hands free. “Touch me,” he demanded. She eagerly touched every inch of him she could reach. Her hands caressing, her mouth kissing every inch of him it could reach. His fingers were inside her again, plunging deeply, finally letting her climax. Brandon rolled over onto her. “Now,” he said huskily. He drove inside her in one smooth, deep thrust. He clenched his teeth when she clenched around him. The muscles in his arms were corded as he held himself above her, not taking his eyes off her face as he thrust hard. “You’re mine. Tell me you’re mine!” he growled, pumping into her with unrestrained power. “I’m yours,” she repeated. “Only yours.” She arched her hips, trying to take more. Brandon felt himself going over the edge. But he didn’t want to go over it yet. He wanted to send her over again first. He lifted her legs over his arms, so he could control the depth of his thrusts, some slow, some fast and deep. “Don’t forget it, Cassie. Don’t you dare forget it.” He drove her quickly over the edge again, this time following with hammering thrusts. When it was over, he collapsed on top of her. He felt her fingers moving through his hair, then down his back. “Again,” he murmured. “Again,” she agreed. *** Cassie watched him as he slept. He’d fallen asleep almost immediately after making love to her the second time. “I love you,” she whispered. By the time Brandon awakened, it was late. Well, he thought, at least I’m not angry anymore. He smiled to himself. His fingers found her fiery red hair and he smoothed it off her face with gentle fingers. Cassie’s eyes opened and she smiled. “Hello.” 144
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“Hello, love. I don’t think I’m frustrated anymore.” She grinned. “Good.” He rolled and pulled her on top of him. He smoothed his hands down her back and cupped her bottom. “Are you ok?” “I’m fine,” she assured him. “Good.” He looked up at her and grinned. “I love you, ya know.” “I know,” she smiled. “Am I forgiven for earlier?” He considered that. “It’s not really a matter of forgiveness, Cassie. But, as far as that question goes, there’s nothing to forgive. You lost your temper and said some things you didn’t mean. I busted your ass for it. It’s over.” “I slapped you.” He grinned. “I remember. “And you’re really not angry that I did?” He shook his head. “I was doing a little button pushing of my own.” “So, you’re really not going to spank me anymore?” she asked softly. “Not as a punishment.” He gave her a serious look. “Not until I’m sure that you really do understand why you’re being spanked, and that it’s up to me to punish you, I damn well don’t want you punishing yourself by letting me hurt you.” “I want to be your sub, Brandon.” “I know.” “And I know that I have to work on my temper.” “Sweetheart, I don’t mind your temper. I really don’t.” He paused and studied her face. “But you do mind mine. When you started to go too far, I tried to warn you—it didn’t work.” He shrugged. “One day, it will…or it won’t. It won’t change the way I feel about you, though. That’s what you’ve got to believe.” “I—I think part of me did.” She touched his cheek. “I’m not ever going to be perfect.” He frowned. “Will you quit? I told you, I don’t expect or even want perfection. How boring. How many times do I have to tell you that I like your fire?” “But I don’t like being a bitch,” she muttered. “Honey, I think there is part of you that is terrified that you’ll say or do the wrong thing and that you will chase me off. It’s not going to happen. Luckily for you, my temper isn’t as quick as yours. I’ve tried to tell you that, but push far enough, and I’ll get angry. We can have one hell of an argument and not have that 145
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change what I feel. Anger isn’t the same as not loving. I think somewhere along the line, you’ve come to believe that it does.” He gave her a serious look. “And, it would help if I knew who or what gave you that idea. When you’re ready, you’ll tell me.” “I still don’t want to talk about it. Not yet,” she said. “Then we won’t—right now. Eventually, we’ll have to; because I can’t help you work through it if I don’t know the details.” “You won’t like it,” she said. He frowned at that. “What won’t I like?” “I touched on it earlier,” she began. “I drive everyone away. It-it’s safer.” He caught on that word. “Safer why?” “You can’t be hurt if you don’t care too much,” she admitted. “So, you keep yourself distant as a self-protective measure?” he guessed. She nodded. “But I don’t want to do that with you.” “So, don’t. It can be as simple as that, Cassie. Be yourself.” “I’m trying,” she said softly. “Cassie, you have to stop testing me; and not because it annoys me, but because, every time you do, you just get angry with yourself,” he pointed out. “We can work on it, but I’m not really sure how to. Tell me what you need from me, and I’ll do my best to give it to you.” He resumed running his hands down her back and bottom. He couldn’t get enough of her. He didn’t think he ever would. “I don’t know exactly.” “Well, spanking your cute butt isn’t the answer. At least not by itself. Not when you can’t take the spanking the way it’s meant— as a means to release.” He gave her a stern look. “I am still pretty upset that you even thought you deserved to be spanked until you were hurt.” “I wasn’t hurt,” she said. “Not really. I was just trying to make up for being so awful to you. I knew you’d stop when you thought I had been punished enough.” “It’s not your job to try and make up for a damn thing when you’re getting spanked, Cassie. It’s not about revenge or you having to somehow make up anything. It’s my job to decide what happens, not yours.” “You did decide.” “Based on incomplete information. You were damn near hysterical when I stopped. I have to trust you to be honest— 146
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especially with your reactions. I don’t just gauge that by how red your bottom is, but also by how you react to it.” “Ok,” she whispered. “So, no more doormat?” he demanded. “No.” “Well, good.” He rolled to his side. “Now, do you feel like reasonably discussing this case of yours?” “I suppose,” she muttered. She rolled over and sat up on the edge of the bed and picked up her robe and put it on. “But I don’t want to fight about it anymore.” Brandon got up and pulled on his pajama bottoms. He took her hand and tugged her into his arms. “Who says it has to be an argument?” She shrugged, then sighed. “You aren’t going to agree with what I want to do. Maybe it’s best if we didn’t discuss it.” He sat down on the edge of the bed and pulled her down onto his lap. “Are you afraid?” She glared at him. “No, I’m not afraid. I just don’t want to argue with you anymore tonight. If you want to talk about it tomorrow, I guess we can. But I don’t want to talk about it tonight.” “Ok,” he said. “So, do you want to go out and eat?” “I don’t really feel like going out, if you don’t mind.” Brandon looked at her, something was moving in her eyes, that troubled look she got when she was thinking something she didn’t want to talk about. “No, hon, I don’t mind if you don’t want to go out. But I do mind if you’re trying to avoid discussing something.” “I just don’t want to talk about work anymore.” “Why? Afraid I might be right?” he drawled, raising a brow. Sometimes he had to push her to make her open up. “All right. Why don’t you tell me how you think this jerk could be caught. I’m all ears,” she said sarcastically. He didn’t grin, but he wanted to. Ok, so he was trying to push her. “I think we should set up a task force. Our department is just as interested as yours is. And personally, I’d love to get him off the streets.” “I know you would. Ok, so what would this task force do?” she asked. “Would we just have different teams trying to set up meets with anyone who seemed strange on the Internet?” “Something like that. Just so there is adequate backup to get the cop out if things went badly.” 147
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“And let me guess…you don’t care what cop does this, just so it’s not me, right?” she said irritably. Brandon moved her to the edge of the bed and got up and paced. “Why would you assume that?” he asked. “I’m assuming you are a competent cop.” Cassie’s eyes narrowed. “I am!” “Cassandra, me, the man, of course doesn’t want you in danger. But the cop in me knows it’s part of your job.” He stopped pacing and looked at her. “So, lose the attitude.” “I don’t want to lose the attitude, Brandon.” He ran an impatient hand through his hair, and glared. “Why the hell not?” She grinned up at him. “’Cause I’m a brat,” she said simply. Brandon’s temper deflated instantly. “Yeah, you are!” He sat next to her and hauled her onto his lap. By now, Cassie was quite used to being hauled onto his lap. “Good thing you like brats, huh?” she said impishly. “Good for you that I like brats. Of course, I do tend to turn them over my lap, not sit them on it,” he teased. “You might deserve a spanking.” She wiggled against him. “I might,” she agreed. “Unless I talk you out of it.” “Gonna try?” he asked curiously. “Would it work?” she asked. He shrugged and gave her hair a light tug. “It might. Would you want it to?” “Might be a nice change,” she teased. Brandon studied her grinning face and knew he was lost. She was sitting here on his lap, her cute butt wiggling against his thighs. “Ok, talk me out of it,” he whispered, pinching her nipple gently. Oh, he was playing dirty! She arched against his hand. “Umm, I’m a good girl,” she said. He continued to tease her breasts. “I know, but that probably won’t save your bottom,” he said. “Good,” she said huskily. Brandon arched her back and lowered his head to her breast, suckling deeply. “Like this?” “Yes,” she said breathlessly. “You know I do.” Brandon positioned her on the bed and continued to tease her breasts. “Yeah, I know you do.” He moved his hand down her smooth stomach and found her moist heat with his fingers. He 148
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teased the soft folds gently. He eased her thighs apart further. “Like this?” Cassie arched against his fingers. “Yes,” she breathed. Brandon smiled. “Alright, little one.” He continued to caress and tease, his fingers gentle. When he drove three fingers inside her, she moaned. “Like that?” he asked. “Yes,” she repeated. “I like that.” She once more arched against his hand, wanting more. This time, he didn’t make her wait. He rolled onto his back and pulled her over him. “Take me, little one,” he ordered huskily. Cassie grinned. She sat up and lowered herself gently onto him, taking him inside in one downward stroke. She sat, wiggling for a moment, and was pleased when he groaned. “Like that?” she teased. Brandon growled and took her breasts into his hands. He caressed them, then pinched the nipples gently. “Oh, yes, little one, I like that,” he said huskily. Cassie was in control, and she liked it. She continued to move up and down, slowly, moving up and down over him, taking him deeply, then moving only slightly. She was driving him crazy, and he loved every minute of it. The look on her face was one of pure rapture. She moved quickly now, taking him deep with each movement of her hips. Brandon moved his hands to her hips, trying to make her move faster, but she wouldn’t let him change the pace she’d set. He grinned. “I think you’re enjoying yourself,” he murmured huskily. Cassie lowered her head and kissed him. “Oh, I am,” she assured him, her voice breathless. Brandon let her have the lead, although he longed to flip her over onto her back and finish it, but for now, her pleasure was increasing his own too much for him to stop her. But, each time she lifted now, he spanked her, knowing that he was increasing her pleasure as he did so. The dual sensations of having him deep inside her and spanking her at the same time sent her over the edge and she collapsed over his chest, too exhausted to move. Only then did Brandon change their positions, flipping her so she was on her back. He made room between her thighs and took her hard and fast, driving himself to his own release. He collapsed over her and groaned. “Lord, woman, you are going to be the death of me.” 149
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Cassie only grinned. *** Over the next week, Cassie moved into his house totally. Brandon discovered that he loved having her at his house. Although the people they both worked with knew they were together, of course, no one knew of their D/s relationship. That part of their relationship was totally private, something that was theirs alone. They had finally come upon a way to catch the perpetrator. Brandon got access to the police safe ISP and used it from home, then helped Cassie in the evenings try to draw him out. He’d sit with her at the computer and help her come up with things to say that would draw the bastard out. They had been so busy with the case and with her moving in, that they hadn’t really discussed their relationship much at all. They made love every day, and he’d given her quite a few playful spankings, but no matter how much she pushed him—and push she did—he didn’t punish her at all. She was starting to get worried, and finally decided that it was time them to discuss it. It was a Friday night, and they were both off for the weekend, which didn’t often happen. Cassie found him when she got home from work sitting at the computer in the study. “Hi, love,” he murmured, standing to give her a long kiss. “Hi yourself,” she replied when he released her mouth. “How was your day?” He grinned. “Not too shabby now that you’re here.” He sat back down and leaned back his chair so he could pull her onto his lap. “How was yours?” “It sucked,” she said honestly. “Lt. Sanders is giving me a hard time.” Brandon frowned. “Why?” He didn’t like to hear that anyone, even her boss, was giving her a hard time. “Just the usual,” she admitted. “But it put me in a bad mood.” He hugged her to his chest. “I’m sorry love. Anything I can do to help?” he asked gently. She sighed and ran her fingers through his hair. “No, not really. Not unless ya feel up to spanking me. I’m in a pretty shitty mood, and I don’t want to take it out on you.” Brandon smiled, hugging her close. She’d progressed so far. “Sure love. Do you want to eat first, though?” 150
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She shook her head. “No, not yet. I didn’t get around to lunch till almost three. It was a hectic day. But, if you’re hungry, I’ll sit with you.” He hadn’t even eaten lunch, but he sure wasn’t going to tell her that. Not when he insisted that she eat three meals a day. “No, it’s ok, I just thought you might be hungry.” “So, wanna stay in here, or go to the bedroom?” he asked. “I’ve been saving up, so if you need a real spanking, I’ll oblige you. Otherwise, our room is fine with me.” “Saving up, huh? What have you been saving?” she asked. She considered that. To be honest, she really wanted the study. They hadn’t played in here for quite a while. “I thought the study was reserved for punishment.” She looked at him curiously. “I think you’ve been pushing most of the week for a spanking—a real one. I’ve been waiting until I thought you could handle it, though. Although, there’s no biggie or anything. But, to be honest, I’d rather save the study.” He paused a moment, thinking. “Are you looking for a hard spanking for my little one, or a vent spanking for my woman?” he asked. “I’m so frustrated, I want to scream,” she said honestly. And, she knew that didn’t bode well for the evening, as she tended to run her mouth big-time when she was in this mood. He considered her for a moment. “Have I ever told you about preemptive spankings?” he asked. “Um, no, I don’t think so.” “Sometimes…just sometimes…a Dom will spank a sub just as a reminder to behave. It’s a punishment, sort of. But not for anything in particular. Call it a reminder.” “Will you stop if I get mad?” she asked. “’Fraid not. Same rules as a punishment, I don’t stop till I think you’ve had enough. And, you know, I won’t stop till you cry.” This was the first time, though, that she’d ever come and asked him for a spanking because she was afraid she’d take her mood out on him. He didn’t want to punish her for that. Not at all. “Personally, I’d just rather take you to our room and give ya a nice warm seat with nothing but my hand on your bared bottom, though. And maybe the leather side of the fur paddle. I don’t think I’ve ever used that on you, have I?” She knew full well that he could make her cry with nothing but his hand. But he’d never used the leather paddle on her, either. “No, you haven’t. So, can we do that?” 151
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“Sure sweetie.” He stood her to her feet and grabbed the toy bag, then tugged her along to their room. He touched her cheek gently, not liking the darkness in her eyes. “No corners or anything—unless you want…” He let the words trail off. “No, I’m afraid I’d say something if you left me in there long. Just spank me, ok?” Brandon nodded and took out the leather paddle. “Come on over here, love.” He sat on the edge of the bed and patted his lap. “Just take off the slacks first, though. I like to look at that cute ass when I’m spanking it.” Cassie smiled at that as she took off her slacks and tossed them onto the back of the chair. She pulled off her ankle holster and sat it on the dresser. Then, she walked over to Brandon and lay over his lap. “Hard or soft?” he asked gently. “Hard,” she decided. “Please.” “Ok, love.” He used his hand and gave her a warm-up first, spanking gently and gradually increasing the strength behind the spanks over the next several minutes. She started to wiggle within a few minutes, when the spanks got harder. Finally, when he’d given her a good warm-up, he picked up the leather paddle. “Just tell me if this is too stingy on a bare bottom,” he ordered, spanking her gently at first, then once more gradually increasing the strength behind them. He gauged her reaction and knew she wasn’t anywhere near the release she needed. Cassie’s eyes were dry, even though her bottom was starting to really sting. She couldn’t seem to shake the mood, though. Brandon decided to turn up the heat. He sat the leather paddle down, then started spanking with his hand. He paused a moment. “What happened, sweetheart?” She shook her head. “I don’t want to talk right now, please.” He started spanking hard and fast, and finally, heard her start to cry, and picking up the leather paddle, continued to spank with the leather paddle for another few moments, lightly. Her legs were kicking now, so he knew she’d had enough. Then, he tossed aside the paddle and began to caress her red bottom gently. “Better?” he asked softly. Cassie was crying hard, but didn’t move as he caressed her burning bottom. He finally stopped the caresses and turned her over on his lap and sat her up. “Ok?” 152
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She nodded and clung to him, sobbing against his shoulder as he held her. “Thank you,” she whispered. Brandon continued to hold her as she cried. “What happened?” he asked again. She lifted her head. “He got another one,” she whispered. “She’s in Intensive Care. S-she’s not expected to make it through the night,” she cried. “I should have caught him by now. It’s my fault.” “No, love, it’s not. You’re not the sick bastard terrorizing women. None of this is your fault.” He reached for her shoulders and massaged them gently, easing the tight muscles. “You don’t understand. I have to stop him,” she cried. “I have to!” Brandon frowned as he pulled back to look at her. “There are at least two departments looking for this bastard, Cassie. You’ve been trying to catch him for weeks!” “And I haven’t, have I?” She stood up and paced, completely unaware that she was half-naked. Brandon certainly wasn’t unaware. “We’ll turn up the heat, Cassie.” He paused. “Now, tell me, what is this really about?” She stopped pacing and looked at him. “How do you do that?” “Do what?” “Always know when I’m thinking about something that I’m not sure how to broach?” she demanded. “Because I know you, Cassie. Now tell me.” It was an order, and he knew she knew it. “Let’s go out,” she said suddenly. Brandon considered whether or not to let her get away with whatever it was she was trying to keep from him. Part of him wanted to make her tell him, but another part wanted her to want to tell him. “Just tell me one thing—is whatever you’re hiding going to get you into trouble?” She shook her head impatiently. “No.” He gave her a hard look, deciding if he should press the issue. He made up his mind. “Okay, then we’ll go out to eat,” he said. “Where do you want to go?” “Let’s go to a club.” His eyes narrowed. “What club?” “I want to go find him, Brandon. Maybe he’s hitting up the BDSM clubs. I know there are none here, but there’s one in Shelton.” 153
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The last thing Brandon wanted to do was take her to a BDSM club. It wasn’t a scene he wanted her involved in, even peripherally. “No.” “Then I’ll go myself,” she decided, picking up her slacks and tugging them on. He was on his feet in an instant. “Like hell!” “I’m going, Brandon, with or without you. This is my job.” “I said no. It’s not open to discussion.” “Why not? I’d be perfectly safe with you there with me, and you know it.” She had him there, he admitted silently. “It’s not a scene I want you exposed to,” he muttered. Now, he was standing and pacing himself. “Are you forgetting what I do for a living?” she demanded hotly. “No, damn it! I just don’t want you in that club.” He knew this was one of those times when the Dom warred with the cop. She wasn’t just his sub and his love; she was police officer and this case was eating her up inside. He sighed. “Too bad, because I’m going anyway.” She walked over to the closet and pulled out a short leather skirt and black low-cut shirt. “You can’t stop me.” His eyes narrowed, and he walked over to her and yanked the clothes from her hands and tossed them onto a chair. “Can’t I?” he said too softly. Cassie knew that tone. He was beyond angry. The air in the room was suddenly thick and she shivered. Oh, she knew he could stop her if he wanted to, but she didn’t think he would. Later, though, she’d pay for pushing him. “Come with me.” Well, she certainly wasn’t going alone. “Get ready,” he snapped. He turned and walked out of the room, closing the door softly behind him.
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Chapter Fourteen Cassie was having second thoughts as they walked into the club. He’d brought his toy bag with him, but that wasn’t what worried her. She was worried that she’d crossed some invisible line that he wouldn’t forgive her for. She knew he warred between the fellow officer and the Dom and lover. She finally looked up at him, her eyes soft. “Brandon?” He looked down at her. She was a beautiful woman, and he never got tired of looking at her. She was wearing the short black leather skirt and top. She’d left her hair long, and wore heels that he’d think would be killing her feet. He knew damn well they’d have to field off propositions by the men in the club. She was damn hot, and thankfully, she was his. He didn’t miss the troubled look in her eye, but now wasn’t the time to address it. He took her arm and shook his head. “We’ll talk later. Remember what I said. I don’t want you out of my sight.” “I need to mingle a little, Brandon. How else will I find this guy if he’s here?” “A woman alone in this place isn’t safe,” he pointed out. “It’s assumed she’s here to play.” “That doesn’t mean I will,” she said tiredly. “I’m not completely stupid.” “Just stay with me,” he muttered darkly. He took her arm and pulled her over to an empty table near the back of the room. “Sit and just watch,” he ordered. Cassie watched fascinated as various people in the room scened together. Some were just simple spanking, as she and Brandon did, but others were literally being whipped and she shivered. She had absolutely no desire to even watch those, but wondered if perhaps one of the men involved was the man they were looking for. Brandon nodded toward a woman who’d been placed over a padded horse, her hands cuffed to the legs, so she couldn’t move. It had a table that could be used, if desired, to support the upper body. The man behind her had pulled up her skirt and was now spanking her hard and fast. “I think we’ll use that spanking horse next,” he said quietly. 155
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Cassie’s eyes were glued on the scene before her. There was a look of absolute rapture on the woman’s face as the man behind her spanked her. “We will?” He took his eyes off the scene and looked at Cassie. “Yes.” She wasn’t at all sure that she wanted anyone to watch while she and Brandon played. “Is that an order?” “Yes,” he said. “It is. Just watch.” He wanted her to worry, he realized. He was still angry with her. He wouldn’t hurt her, but he was about to break his own rule, and spank her when he was angry. If it had been a hot anger, it would be different. But this, what he was feeling now, was a cold anger. She may be a cop, but he intended to remind her that she was also his woman, and what could happen when she was helpless. Cassie watched the scene with a horrified fascination. She was excited, and didn’t understand it. The man had replaced his hand with a leather paddle now. Every few moments, he’d stop and go and whisper something into the woman’s ear that would make her shiver. “Do you know them?” Cassie asked finally. Brandon nodded. “It’s Sherry and her husband.” “Do they know you’re a cop?” she asked, incredulous. He nodded again. “We’re friends.” Cassie looked at him. “And you’ve…um…” “Spanked her? Yes, I’ve spanked her, with her husbands permission, and Sherry’s of course.” It had been quite a while since he’d played with her, though. He didn’t like to share and Sherry belonged to Jack. “Oh.” He grinned at that. “You know you’re not the only woman I’ve spanked, Cassie. But trust me; you’re the only one in my life right now.” “I-I remember you saying Sherry deserved a spanking,” she recalled. “You told me I could watch.” “Do you want that?” he asked very seriously. “Do you want to see what I look like when you’re not on the receiving end?” She nodded, despite herself. “Yes,” she whispered. He shrugged. “Let’s go talk to them. I’ve wanted to introduce you to them anyway. They’re one of the few couples that I’m friends with in real life.” He stood and held out his hand to her. She didn’t take it immediately. “You’re not going to let him…” “Of course not, Cassie. You’re mine, and I don’t share. But I’ll let them watch when I spank you.” 156
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She gave him a questioning look. “If you want to fit in, and try and find this sick bastard, you’ve got to be a part of the action. This was your idea, not mine,” he reminded her. “I guess I wasn’t thinking, “she admitted. She hadn’t thought any further than just being here. No wonder he hadn’t let her come alone. “Big surprise, that,” he muttered. “Come on.” He tugged her hand and led her toward the couple by the horse. Brandon grinned as he stopped, Cassie’s hand tight in his. “Long time no see, Jack,” he said. Jack looked up and returned the grin. “Well, I’ll be damned. And who is the lovely lady?” Brandon tightened his hand around Cassie’s. “My lady. Cassandra, meet Jack and Sherry Winston.” “Hello,” Cassie said. Jack looked at Cassie speculatively. About time, he thought. “So, what brings you here? I didn’t think you particularly liked this scene.” “Oh, Cassie was curious,” he said. “And I figured what the hell. She’s very new to D/s.” “Ah, a novice! So, I take it you two were watching?” Jack said with a grin. “Shall I let Sherry up, or do you owe her anything?” Brandon grinned and walked around to look at Sherry. She grinned up at him. “Hi.” “Um, I don’t think he owes me anything, Sir,” Sherry said with a grin, not meaning a word of what she said. Brandon gave her a mock frown. “Now that’s not quite true, is it?” he asked. Jack grinned and handed over the leather paddle. “Be my guest,” he said. Brandon took the offered paddle and walked behind Sherry. “Remember respect, Sherry?” he said softly. “Yes,” she said, her voice thick. Other than her husband, Brandon was the only one that ever had spanked her. ‘Yes, what?” he demanded, starting to spank in slow, steady strokes. Sherry wiggled. He did tend to spank harder than Jack did. “Sir,” she said quickly, feeling the heat build in her already tender bottom. 157
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Jack looked down at Cassie. “Sherry has a little trouble with Sir,” he explained. “I tend to put up with it a little more than Brandon does, though.” Cassie only nodded, unsure what to say. She watched the intent look on Brandon’s face as he spanked the pretty blonde. Is that what he looked like when he spanked her? She shivered slightly. Jack noted the shiver. “Are you next?” he asked. Cassie looked at him and nodded. “He’s not pleased with me at the moment,” she admitted. Sherry, Cassie noted, didn’t have a look of rapture on her face any longer. She was crying softly as Brandon lectured and spanked her. Finally, he stopped and handed the paddle back to Jack. “Thanks. She’s owed that for quite a while.” Jack grinned, as he let his wife out of the restraints. He lowered her skirt and hugged her. “Going to be a good girl?” he asked her softly. “Yes, Sir,” Sherry said dutifully. Brandon walked to her and gave her a brief hug, too. “Good girl,” he said gently. But then, he turned to Cassie. “Your turn, young lady.” Cassie blushed. “But…” “No. Come here,” he ordered. Cassie wasn’t at all sure about being cuffed to this horse. She trusted Brandon, but this was beyond what she was comfortable with. She walked over to him and took his hand, her eyes pleading. Brandon was angry with her and with himself. He knew damn well that this wasn’t something she wanted. But, she’d started this, and he was going to finish it. He led her to the side of the horse. “Lean over,” he said coolly. She shook her head, a look of near panic on her face. “Please,” she whispered. “Do as you’re told, young lady.” Another lesson in trust. Trust was an issue with her, and this was just the opportunity to show her about submission; doing something she didn’t want, because he did. Cassie leaned over the horse, her eyes closed tightly. She felt Brandon take her wrists and put them into the padded handcuffs. She remembered that he’d stop if she used her safeword, and kept telling herself that over and over as she felt him lift the short skirt up, baring her to him. 158
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He used the table to support her upper body, knowing she’d be more comfortable. Then, he knelt in front of her. He could see the fear. Damn it, he thought, he didn’t want her afraid. “I love you, Cassie. Remember that. Just try and stay relaxed. I won’t do more than you can take,” he promised. He didn’t wait for her to respond, just walked beside her and dug into his toy bag. He pulled out his own leather paddle, and started to spank her with it, although not hard. “Just a little reminder, young lady, in case you decide to forget respect.” “Yes, Sir,” she said quickly. Brandon grinned at his friends, which were standing in front of them. “She’s learned pretty quickly,” he said proudly. Still, he continued to spank her. He was still angry that she’d made him bring her here, and this was the least of what she deserved. He started spanking a little harder, “You’ll remember to do as you’re told?” he demanded with a hard swat. “Won’t you?” Cassie was wiggling. She couldn’t decide if he was punishing her or not. Still; it was arousing in a strange way. “Yes, Sir,” she insisted. He wasn’t really hurting her, he’d spanked her quite a bit harder a few times before, but still, it was only a few moments before she was crying softly. In part, though, it was because she sensed his anger. “I’ll be good!” Brandon flipped the paddle over and started to use the padded side, easing the sting with it. Her bottom was a nice shade of pink, just the way he liked it. “Yes, I’m sure you will,” he said softly. At least for an hour, he thought with a tinge of anger. He tossed the paddle back in the bag and pulled her skirt back down. He knew that no one but him had really been paying much attention to the spanking. Even Jack and Sherry were just whispering to each other, absorbed in their own discussion. He walked around and released the handcuffs, and helped her to her feet. He pulled her quickly into his arms. “I love you, Cassie.” He looked up at his friends a moment. “We’re going to go sit down for a while. Cassie’s never been here, so she wanted to see what the club scene was all about.” He grinned now. “But I think she’ll learn more if she’s watching, not participating.” Jack and Sherry both smiled. “Nice to meet you, Cassie,” Sherry said. “But, better your ass every day than mine with him,” she said on a chuckle. “Nice meeting you both,” she said. Brandon grinned. “Tender, Sherry?” he teased. 159
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She pouted. “Maybe,” she admitted. Cassie could relate. He did spank hard. Brandon nodded. “Good.” Jack laughed. “She says you spank harder than I do, Brandon.” Brandon grinned. “That’s entirely possible,” he admitted. “I don’t generally have to repeat the same lesson too often, though.” Jack seemed to consider that. “Hmmm, maybe I’ll try that.” Brandon laughed, and then with a final goodbye, led Cassie back to the table. He eased her to a chair and sat next to her. “Well?” “Well what?” she whispered. “I know damn well you didn’t enjoy that at all,” he said stiffly. “Part of me did,” she said softly. “But it doesn’t matter.” “And why the hell is that?” he demanded. She gave him a very serious look. “Because I know you’re pissed off.” “So? Yeah, I’m a little ticked, but why does that make it not matter? “You were getting even with me, so it’s all good.” Getting even? Lord. “Have you seen enough of this place or do you want to stick around a while longer?” he asked, barely managing to keep his voice even. The rub of it was—she was right. He’d been getting even; at least in part. “We’re here, might as well make sure that there’s no one suspicious.” He nodded. “Ok, we’ll walk around and check things out.” But when they got out of there, they would certainly be talking! He stood and held out his hand to her. “C’mon.” Cassie took his hand and he led her through the club. He noted that several of the men were giving her appreciative glances and frowned. Sooner or later, if they didn’t get out of there, someone was going to come up and ask to scene with her. He was watching the various scenes going on in the open areas. Most of them were pretty tame, and no one struck him as having a particularly evil slant. Of course, he had no idea what was going on in some of the private rooms the club had. Those were ones very few people even knew about. He wasn’t at all sure he wanted to even tell Cassie they were there, since there was no way into them without being invited. Finally, he led her back to the table they’d vacated a while before. “See anything?” 160
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“No,” she admitted. “Damn it, I wish someone had been able to give a half-way decent description of this guy. “Well, now what?” he asked. “That’s up to you, Sir.” she said. He gave her a curious look. “How’s that?” She had that troubled look on her face again, but this wasn’t the place to discuss it. “I know you’re mad at me, Brandon.” He’d heard enough. “That’s it, Cassie. We’re going to go talk.” She looked at him curiously. “Where?” “Where? Damn it, where the fuck do you think? Our place. Unless you’d like another little trip over the horse first!” Damn it, he was tempted to do exactly that, only not for a five minute game. He was tempted to give her a little more real taste of real submission. He ignored the niggling part of his brain that told him to stop. Hell, he wasn’t perfect any more than she was. “If you wish,” she said softly. Perhaps it was better to let him vent a little more. He certainly hadn’t hurt her. His voice changed and he gave her a hard look. “Alright, Cassandra.” He bent and picked up his toy bag. “Let’s go.” “Yes, Sir,” she said softly. Within a few moments, the couple playing on the horses had moved away, and Brandon looked at Cassie. “If I put you over this thing, little one, it won’t be like before,” he warned, willing her silently to ask him to stop. “I know,” she said softly, then leaned over the horse. Brandon moved the table under her chest, but still used the cuffs on it to keep her from moving. Next, he moved behind her and used two scarves from his bag to tie her legs to the pole in the center of the horse. There was nowhere she could go, nothing she could do but submit to whatever it was he did to her. She hadn’t said one word, though. No pleas, no promises, just this strange quietness he wasn’t at all sure he liked or wanted. Cassie shivered as she felt him tie her legs. She was totally at his mercy, yet, even though she knew she should be afraid, she didn’t even think to ask him to stop. She turned her head and watched him get things out of his bag. He took out the rubber paddle he knew she hated, and the leather paddle and a clear paddle she hadn’t seen before. She thought she’d seen all the toys he used. 161
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Finally, he walked in front of her. “Before we are done here, little one, you are going to promise to obey me, and not to push me.” His voice was hard. Again, he ignored the niggling that told him he was making a mistake. He saw her watch as he picked up the rubber paddle first. Brandon walked behind her. Damn, she was sexy like this, with that short little leather skirt so high on her thighs. It covered her ass, but barely. He walked slightly to the side and drew back the paddle and let it land on her ass with force. The leather skirt would do a lot to lessen the sting. He continued to spank slowly, waiting between each stinging whack of the paddle. Finally, after about ten swats with it, he sat it down next to her, where she could see it, then picked up the clear paddle. He lifted her skirt to her waist. She felt his hand braced on her back and tensed, waiting for the first whack to fall on her already tender bottom. When it came with the expected stinging force, she moaned softly. This paddle was like fire; even worse than the wooden one he’d used on her. Brandon paused at her moan, but didn’t stop. He knew the Lexan paddle stung like hell. It was designed to deliver a major sting, and was even safe on bare bottoms, but he didn’t use it on them often. It was purely a punishment implement, at least for him. Some subs liked the intense sting; but he doubted that Cassie would. He delivered a second and third whack, and felt the muscles in her slender back start to shiver. He paused again, and walked in front of her and leaned down. “Are you enjoying this, young lady?” he demanded. She turned her head and looked at him. How was she to answer that? Because, even though it hurt, part of her was. She wanted his strength, wanted him to be in control. “Not that you’re angry, no, Sir,” she whispered. “And aren’t you afraid? Since I’ve broken my own rule not to punish you when I’m angry?” he demanded, forcing her to meet his angry blue gaze. Afraid? Lord, she’d never been so turned on in her life. And it suddenly dawned on her that she wasn’t afraid because she truly trusted him. “No, Sir,” she whispered. He glared at her. “Perhaps you will be before I’m finished,” he said darkly, not realizing the implication of what she’d admitted. Her stomach lurched at that. Those dark words had accomplished what this position hadn’t. The fact that he wanted to scare her was enough to do exactly that. “Is that what you want?” 162
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she asked, unable to stop the shaking in her voice. She wondered if he even realized that she was afraid that he didn’t care anymore, not of whatever he might be planning next. Brandon didn’t answer her. He picked up the leather paddle and walked beside her again. He gave her a hard slap with his hand. “Perhaps it is,” he said. “Perhaps it is.” He started spanking fast, keeping one hand on her back to gauge her reactions. Even in his anger, he wasn’t going to really hurt her. “Is this what you wanted?” he demanded finally, pausing, and rested his hand on her burning bottom. He couldn’t stop his hand from caressing the sting away. Cassie couldn’t answer him, she was crying too hard. He was still furious with her, she knew that. Finally, after a long moment, she calmed enough to speak. “I’m sorry!” Brandon reached around and picked up the leather paddle. “I know, little one,” he said grimly. He started spanking her again, not holding back at all with this paddle. It was thin and pliant, and stung like the devil. Finally, he tossed it aside on the table, then stood behind her, rubbing the sting away while she continued to cry. After a long moment, he lowered the skirt over her reddened bottom and bent to untie her legs, then moved over to uncuff her hands. He eased her to her feet, ignoring the few people that were watching the scene. Cassie looked up at him with tear-filled eyes. “I’m sorry.” Brandon kept his face impassive. “Put the toys away, young lady.” “Yes, Sir.” She quickly put the paddles back into the bag. Then, turned and looked at him, waiting. He held open his arms then and she ran into them. He hugged her tight, whispering now. “We’ll finish this in privacy.” She felt her stomach lurch. She’d thought they had finished.
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Chapter Fifteen “Oh no, we’re not done yet. Just as far as I’m willing to let anyone watch,” he said softly, his voice low. Part of him knew he was being more than unreasonable. They were here at her insistence, but he could have refused. If he was honest, he was as angry with himself as he was with her. He wasn’t going to punish her—not for this. He shouldn’t have put her on that horse for the second time. The first had been bad enough. He started to walk across the room with her when a man stopped them. Brandon sized the man up in about two seconds. He was tall, but thin, with greasy dark hair and little beady eyes. Brandon had been a cop long enough to realize the guy was either drunk or stoned or both. Even if he’d been inclined to share, it wouldn’t be with this jerk. Brandon didn’t recognize him, and he had been here quite a few times. “Can I help you?” Brandon asked. The man looked at Cassie, an evil grin on his face. “I want her,” he said. Brandon’s face hardened. “Too bad. She’s mine.” The man continued to watch Cassie, his eyes narrowing. “I don’t see a collar on her,” he said in a low voice. Brandon looked at Cassie. “Do you want to go with him, little girl?” he asked, pretending to really give a shit if she did or not. Hell would freeze over first. Cassie couldn’t suppress a shiver. “No, Sir,” she said softly. “I only want to serve you.” Brandon smiled. “Sorry friend, but the lady says no.” A woman was generally safe here, as long as she was protected. But he didn’t like the looks of this guy. He hadn’t seen him when he’d been spanking Cassie and wondered if he’d watched the scene. Cassie was sexy as hell, and was bound to draw attention. “She’s a slave, isn’t she? Doesn’t matter what she wants.” It was a challenge, and Brandon knew it. Every once in a while some ass wanted to prove he was a big shot. “But it matters what I want, and I don’t share.” Cassie felt him tense against her. She kept her eyes low, but was watching every move the man made. If he made a move, she’d strike, she decided. 164
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Brandon looked down at her and shook his head. “Don’t even think about it,” he snapped. Then, he looked at the jerk standing in front of them. “Get out of my way, man. We were just leaving.” The man shook his head and Brandon felt Cassie tense. If she opened her mouth, he decided, he’d stop right where they were and bust her ass for the entire damn club to see. “I want her,” he paused. “And I mean to have her.” Brandon actually laughed. “Not unless you think you can take her,” he said, keeping his voice deceptively soft. The man grinned, showing yellowing teeth. “She’ll come with me if she doesn’t want to see you hurt.” Brandon tightened his arm around Cassie in warning, then moved his hands to his sides. “I don’t think so.” The man ignored Brandon and looked at Cassie. “You’re a slut, and you should learn that from a real Master.” Cassie smiled very sweetly, then lifted her leg and kicked the jerk right in the balls as hard as she could. “Mine is fine, thanks,” she said sweetly. Damn her to hell! Did she really think that he’d have not protected her? “Cassandra!” She looked up into Brandon’s furious gaze. “Sir?” Neither paid any attention to the man clutching his balls and gagging in front of them. Brandon pulled the jerk’s head up and drove his fist into his face. “Don’t call my sub a slut,” he warned. “Or I’ll let her kick you again.” He punched him again. “And this is just because I don’t like you.” Brandon didn’t have to hit him again, because the club bouncers took in the situation and took over, taking the man and tossing him out the door. Brandon turned his attention to Cassie. “That was fucking stupid, Cassandra. Don’t you know that this little stunt could have brought problems at work if it had escalated?” Brandon rarely swore. To Cassie, that told her just how pissed he was. She opened her mouth, but Brandon slapped a hand over it gently. “Not one word,” he warned. “Damn it!” He dragged her to the nearest bench and sat on it, dragging her across his lap. He knew damn well he had an audience as he lifted her skirt up to her waist and started spanking her, not holding back the strength behind his smacks at all. He ignored the kicking legs and grabbed her hand when it flew back to protect her exposed bottom. 165
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Cassie’s bottom was on fire, and she couldn’t help but kick. Each time she thought he’d spanked her as hard as he ever would; he’d surprise her and spank her a little harder. Each stinging smack brought a gasp, but there was more than that. She was excited, too. She felt herself dampen as he continued to spank her. Even through tears, she loved his strength. Finally, the punishing smacks stopped, and she was crying, hiding her head against his leg. Brandon looked down at her red ass and was so furious, he was tempted to start spanking her all over again. Instead, he pulled her skirt down, oblivious to the onlookers, and flipped her over on his lap. He pointed to the wall beside them. “See that circle right there?” Cassie looked over at the small circle on the wall and nodded. “Put your nose in it,” he snapped. Cassie scrambled off his lap, went, and put her nose against the hole in the wall. It was embarrassing to have an entire room full of people see her standing like this. She was thankful that at least he hadn’t made her take off her skirt first. It was bad enough that they had all watched him spank her. Brandon kept his eye on her, but walked over to the table closest to the wall and sat down. He ordered a soda from the waitress that walked up to the table. This club didn’t serve alcohol. He left her standing against the wall for twenty minutes. It took him that long to calm down enough to walk over to her. He turned her around with gentle hands. “You deserved every damn smack,” he said grimly. She only nodded, and clung to him. Brandon only held her a few moments before pulling her back. His eyes were hard as he looked down into her tear-streaked face. “Now, we are leaving. You will not open your mouth. Do you understand me? Nod your head if you do.” Cassie, eyes wide, nodded her head. He took her hand and took her out of the club. He led her to the car, and opened the door for her. When she climbed in, he shut it, then walked around to the other side and got in himself. He looked over at her. She was still crying, but the look on her face was what got to him. He cursed beneath his breath, dragged her across the seat, and held her against his chest, cupping her burning bottom beneath the leather skirt. “I love you, little one, but we are far from done tonight. I’m taking you home and 166
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busting your ass for you again; and yeah, it’s because I’m more than a little ticked off.” “Y-yes Sir,” she said, clinging to him. Finally, she looked up at him. In the dim light of the street lamp, she could make out his angry features. “Will you make love to me?” she asked. Brandon felt a surge of lust, and hardened uncomfortably in his jeans. “Yes,” he said huskily. He moved his hand beneath the dubious cover of her thong and found her heat. She was wet and when he drove his fingers inside her, she arched against him. He groaned. Even pissed off, she could turn him on. “First—and after,” he promised. He put her back to her side of the seat. “Buckle up,” he ordered, starting the car. *** When they got back to Brandon’s house, he helped her out of the car, grabbed his toy bag, and walked with her into the house. He didn’t stop until they were in the bedroom. He didn’t make her wait long. He pulled her against him, letting her feel his hard length against her belly as he pulled her hard against him. His hands moved beneath her skirt, skimming up her thigh to her bottom. He pulled her closer, and ground against her. Finally, regaining a little control, he pulled back and looked into her wide eyes. He didn’t speak, just lifted her skirt to her waist, and ripped off the pink thong she wore. He left the skirt at her waist and pulled back to unzip his jeans. He kicked off his boots and pulled his jeans off, then his shirt and socks. Cassie stared, unable to speak. She wanted him to hurry, to drive himself inside her. Brandon reached for her shirt and tugged it off, throwing it onto the floor, then took off her bra. He stayed her hands when she reached for the waist of the skirt. “Leave it on,” he ordered huskily. “I like you in leather.” He led her to the padded chair near the corner of the room and bent her over it. “Hold the seat,” he said, his voice deep. Cassie blindly obeyed, waiting to see if he’d bring her pleasure or pain—it didn’t matter which at that point. She was so close to the edge that she could barely breathe. Brandon moved behind her. Her bottom was still pink from the spanking he’d given her earlier. He could punish her like this— 167
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spank her hard, and love her, too. He ran a hand down the dark cleft, and moved it between her thighs. “Open your legs,” he ordered. Cassie spread her legs a little, waiting, wanting, needing. “Please.” Brandon drove three fingers into her moist heat, driving them in hard, and flicking her clitoris with his thumb. She arched against him, and felt him against her naked bottom. Brandon drove her to the edge with nothing but his fingers, then pulled them out, replaced them with his shaft in a hard thrust. He held her hips and drove into her, each thrust reaching her core at this angle. Brandon felt her nearing release and pulled out of her. This wasn’t going to end so quickly, he decided. He pulled her up and took her over to the bed. He sat down and pulled her across his lap. He played with her ass, kneading it, and then rubbing it gently. She was arching against him and he grinned. She liked this as much as he did. He started to spank her softly, teasing light spanks designed to arouse. Suddenly, he wanted to see her face as he spanked her. He eased her off his lap. He led her to the mirror by the closet. “Don’t move,” he ordered. He went across the room and grabbed the straight-back chair. He brought it over and put it in front of her. “Kneel on the chair, Cassandra. Look in the mirror.” Cassie wasn’t sure what he was going to do, but she did as he asked. She rested on her knees, holding onto the back of the chair. Brandon walked behind her, slightly to the side. “Stay still, Cassandra.” He started spanking her, watching her face in the mirror as her eyes darkened, and she arched back. “No! Hold still.” He gave her a sharp smack, then another. It was strange watching herself being spanked by him. She watched each time his hand reached back, and her heart raced a little each time it connected with her bottom. The look on his face was intent, and he was fully aroused. The next smack packed quite a sting and she saw that he almost looked angry, at the very least, determined. She was afraid to speak. He spanked her hard, but she didn’t move out of position. Brandon was teasing himself as much as her. Finally, he pulled her up and sat down, pulling her down over him and driving deep inside her. He let her ride him, holding her hips as she did. Finally, he moved his hands to her breasts, caressing, teasing, pinching gently. Then, he lowered his head and suckled the nipple, nipping, then laving it with his tongue. 168
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Cassie was frantic now, driving toward release, but he pulled her down and held her when she would have gone over the edge. She opened her eyes and gave him a questioning look. He wanted to take her in every position imaginable, wanted to make her feel and do things she’d never done before. He lifted her off his lap again. “Trust me?” “Yes,” she breathed the word. “Go get the bag. We’re going to try something a little different.” Cassie went over and picked up the toy bag and brought it back to him. “Now, go lie on the bed, on your stomach,” he ordered. Cassie went slowly to the bed. What was he going to do now? She lay on the bed, turning her face to the side and waited to see what he’d do next. Brandon walked over to the edge of the bed. “Close your eyes.” When she had, he grabbed several scarves from the bag and quickly snagged her wrist and tied it to the bed, then did the same with the other. He considered a moment what to do with her legs. In the end, he left them free. He loved it when she wiggled them for him. He walked to the head of the bed. “Open your eyes,” he ordered huskily. Cassie looked at him. “Ok,” she whispered. Brandon grabbed the paddles out of the bag. “I’m going to punish you like this, Cassandra. Why do you deserve to be punished?” he asked gently. “B-because I kneed that jerk,” she whispered. “Because you put yourself in danger,” he countered, his voice stern. “If he’d have touched you, I’d have had to kill him.” She looked at him with wide eyes. “I have to start listening to you, don’t I?” He nodded. “I don’t give unwarranted orders, and I don’t administer unwarranted punishments. I demand respect, as I respect you, and I demand that you obey me, especially when it comes to your safety. It’s time you really learn that, sweetheart. And you haven’t yet.” He paused a moment. “Do you understand me?” “Yes, Sir,” she said softly. “You asked me earlier if I wanted you afraid, remember?” “Yes,” she whispered. “I don’t, Cassie. I shouldn’t have said that I did. But I want you to know that I’m not pleased with your actions. Now, do you have any questions?” he asked. 169
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Her stomach lurched, but she shook her head. “No, Sir.” “Good. Now, I want you to keep your eyes open. And I want your honest reactions. Can I trust you to give them to me?” “Yes, Sir,” she whispered. “Can you tell me that you don’t deserve to be punished?” he demanded. “No, Sir,” she admitted. He put a pillow under her head, and then grabbed two more. “Lift up that cute ass,” he said, his voice husky. “Part of you is going to like this, Cassie. But part of it you won’t.” He paused a moment, deciding what he should say next. “I’m not angry anymore, love. But unless you tell me no right now, I’m going to spank you until you promise not to act foolishly again. I won’t mark you, and I won’t seriously hurt you, but this, I think, you’ll remember.” “Yes, Sir,” she whispered. Cassie lifted, and felt him put the pillows beneath her, then pulled down the leather skirt for the first part of the punishment. He lifted the rubber paddle and started spanking her with it, hard strokes all over her leather-covered bottom. He didn’t stop this time, not when she started kicking or wiggling, trying to get away. He watched her face and saw that her eyes were damp already. She’d give in totally this time before he stopped this. He continued to spank, aiming carefully, only striking her bottom. Cassie didn’t think he was ever going to stop. It really didn’t hurt much; not through the protection of the leather, but his emotions vibrated through every swat. Part of her really did enjoy having no control. She wasn’t sure if this was a punishment or not, though. Next, he picked up the clear paddle. “Do I have your attention yet?” he asked darkly as he gave her a swat with it. He urged her up enough to lift the skirt again. “Y-yes, Sir,” she cried, jerking as it struck her burning bottom. By the fifth swat, she couldn’t stop sobbing. This was a punishment, she had no doubt now. He was spanking her hard, but even more, she knew how upset he really was. “I’m sorry!” “Don’t you ever disobey me again, young lady,” he ordered, his voice cold. He centered five swats on the sit spot that was totally exposed in this position with the pillows beneath her. “Please stop,” she begged. “No,” he said quietly. But he did untie her hands. He helped her off the bed, but instead of releasing her, he pulled her back 170
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over his lap, and started spanking with his hand. “Are you going to obey me?” he asked, not spanking nearly as hard as he had earlier at the club. “Y-yes,” she whimpered. He looked at her bottom for a long moment. It was bright red, and burning hot when he touched it. He felt her jerk when he moved his hand over it, and sighed. “Why am I doing this?” he demanded, spanking her again. “B-because you’re mad at me,” she cried. “I’m sorry! Please, please stop. I’m sorry.” He realized that she still didn’t get it. He started spanking harder, “Are you?” he demanded. “I’m sorry I scared you,” she screamed, kicking wildly. “I’ll obey you, I will! I’ll go, just stop!” Finally, he stopped. “Do you want to leave now?” “N-no, but I will. I’m sorry you’re angry and don’t love me anymore.” Brandon turned her over in his lap and held her close, pulling her head against his chest. “It’s all over now, baby.” He closed his eyes tightly, but he had to break her. He’d tried to warn her he could be a cold son of a bitch. Now she knew just what he was capable of. But, he’d overdone it, especially if she didn’t think he loved her. He moved back onto the bed, pulling her with him, and laid her over him, rubbing her bottom gently now. “I love you Cassie. Damn it, you have to start thinking before you act. You’ve got to not risk yourself. I promise, love, I don’t want you to go and I’ve never even for one moment stopped loving and wanting you.” She nodded, and continued to sob against his chest, clinging to him. “You don’t want me to go?” she whispered. Brandon ran his fingers through her hair and down her slender back. She was still shaking. “Of course not. I love you. I keep telling you that I can be furious with you, and still love and want you. But damn it, I’m going to spank that streak of ‘damn the torpedoes’ out of you.” “I love you, too.” “You scared me, Cassie. And pissed me off. That’s a bad combination.” “I get that,” she whispered. “Sit up, little one,” he said huskily. Cassie scrambled to sit up, her soft warmth over his erection. His hands moved to her hips and he guided her down onto his 171
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shaft. He moved his hands to her face and pulled her down and kissed her, gentle, nibbling kisses. She was rocking against him slowly, taking all of him with each downward motion of her hips. When his hands moved to her breasts, she moaned. He teased her nipples, flicking them, then pulled her down and suckled her. When he finally lifted his head, he was breathing as hard as she was. “I love you.” He flipped their positions, and moved against her, setting a smooth pace. This time when she started to clench those muscles around him, he drove deep and hard, sending her over, and then following himself. Brandon rolled over onto his side, and pulled her with him. He caressed her back and bottom softly. “Ok?” She nodded against his chest. “Uh huh.” “Still afraid of me?” She considered that for a moment. “A little,” she admitted. He sighed. “I guess you’ll have to be,” he said. “Because I can’t promise not to do what I just did again. I just can’t let you put yourself at risk. I’ll do this all over again, if you risk yourself again.” “I know,” she whispered. “But maybe I can promise not to make you.” He smiled at that. “Sweetheart, I like your fire. I don’t ever want to quench it. But I have to know you’re safe. I keep telling you, spanking you—nothing seemed to sink in. I’m hoping the paddling you got did the trick; but if it didn’t, I’ll just repeat it.” Cassie shivered. “I know.” Brandon sighed, holding her close. “I want to ask you something, Cassie.” She looked at him. “What?” “I want to know what you are thinking right now.” He wondered if she’d tell him, or still keep it from him. “I hate disappointing you. I hate pissing you off, too.” There was only one thing she could do to really make it right. He was suddenly afraid that she’d run. Partly because she was afraid of him, but partly because she was afraid of herself. “I’m not letting you go, Cassandra. If that’s what you’re thinking, think again.” She started to cry. “I’m not right for you,” she whispered. “Don’t you see that?” 172
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“Fuck no, I don’t see that! Damn it, you’re not going!” He rolled her onto her back and drove inside her, hard. “Get that, lady? You’re not going anywhere.” Cassie cried, but clung to him. “I keep hurting you,” she cried. Brandon rose up, and put her legs around his arms, driving deeply inside her. “Hush, just let me love you.” He didn’t tease her this time; he just drove inside her, bringing them both to fast, hard orgasm. Cassie felt his weight as he released her legs and collapsed over her. He was breathing hard, his head buried in the curve of her neck. Finally, he lifted his head, his breathing still ragged. “You’re not going.” “But you’re angry,” she whispered, touching his face, loving him. “I don’t want you to be angry.” Remembering her sore bottom, he switched their positions so she rested over him. He ran his hands down her back, cupped her bottom. “Still sore?” She blushed and nodded. “Yes.” Brandon sat up and tugged her across his lap. He touched her bottom lightly. It was still red and obviously tender. He’d given her a hell of a spanking. He rubbed it gently for a long moment. “I overdid it,” he said softly. “I wish I could say that it wouldn’t happen again.” He continued to caress her, smiling a little when she moaned. He knew she liked his hands on her. Hell, he liked his hands on her. He moved them down to her thighs, which were red as well. Cassie moved against his hand, and felt him growing hard against her belly. “It’s ok. I’m not afraid of being spanked.” “Sure?” he asked. “It turns me on, Brandon. You know that, don’t you?” He nodded, and then realized she wasn’t looking at his face. “Yes, I know it does. Even this, huh?” he asked, continuing his ministrations. “Does that make me strange?” she asked softly. He chuckled. “No, it makes you perfect.” She turned her head and looked at him. “Huh?” “I love to spank, sweetheart. Sometimes, I get really intense as you know now. But I like knowing that you can handle whatever I do, as long as you trust me. Even if you are a little afraid of me. I’ve never given someone a spanking like you just got,” he admitted. 173
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He turned her over and held her on his lap. “I’ve never met a woman like you, love. Not one that could match my passion with her own to the degree that you do” “You’ve brought out the wanton in me,” she said softly. “Thank God for wantons,” he said with a grin. “Let’s sleep, love. You’ve got to be exhausted. She looked up at him, suddenly serious. “I am sorry I scared you Brandon, but I’m not sorry I kicked that ass in the balls.” “I already know that, sweetheart. You got your ass burned for not listening to me, not for kicking him. It’s my job to protect you—especially in a club. The cop in you wars with that,” he explained gently. “Yeah, it does. I don’t know if I’ll be able to change,” she admitted. “I don’t really want you to,” he said. “I want you to be yourself. It’s the same thing that I’ve spanked you for before, though. Putting yourself in needless danger. I’ll never accept that. I can’t, it’s not in my nature. But I’m not suddenly going to want you to leave just because I’m pissed off. You’ve gotta stop thinking I will, love.” He ran his hands down her soft back, loving the feel of her against him. “I don’t mind busting your ass when you act without thinking—not really. Hell, I’ve never met someone that can take a spanking the way you can. So, I keep raising the heat, spanking longer and harder—being colder to get past that natural resistance. That’s not going to change.” “But don’t you see? Part of me likes that—that knowing that you can control me. That I can’t stop you.” “Of course you do. I wouldn’t spank you if you didn’t like spanking.” He continued to caress her. “But I think you’re afraid of my temper, and while I didn’t really want that, I’ve figured out that it’s ok. At least it’ll give you something to think about. The fact that you like knowing that I can take total control over you if I have to assures me that when it’s all said and done, that you still love me, and know that I love you. That’s the thing that you’re not sure about yet—and I wish I could reassure you, but I can’t. With time, I’m hoping that you’ll learn that I can be totally ticked off and not want rid of you; and be sure that I’ll never seriously hurt you.” “I get pretty insecure sometimes,” she said. He touched her hair, and then continued caressing her back. “I know, sweetheart. One day, you’ll feel safe enough with me to tell me why.” He paused a moment, studying her. He could see 174
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that she was still wary of him, and for now, that might be a good thing. “I’m not letting you go, love. I don’t think I can. That being said, though—I want your word that if I really do scare you, or make you relive whatever it is you’re not telling me, that you’ll use your safeword before you let me do damage I won’t know I’m doing.” She gave him a very serious look. “Do you really want to know what happened?” she asked softly. He frowned at that. “You know the answer to that.” “Ok,” she sighed. “Want to know why I became a cop?” “If you want to tell me,” he said softly. He pulled the sheet from beneath them and pulled it over them. He held her, resting her head on his chest. “I wanted to be in control finally. I didn’t want anyone to be able to hurt me again.” He winced, thinking of her very red bottom. “Is that why you’re afraid? Because I hurt you?” he asked softly. He felt her head shake a negative response to that, and said a silent prayer of thanks. “Tell me.” “It’s what I don’t understand. When I was a kid, I didn’t have any control, and I hated it. I promised myself that I’d never be in that position again. My dad—lets just say it wasn’t pleasant.” “Cassie, do I bring back bad memories of being abused?” he asked gently, holding her as close as he could. “I don’t want to lose you; I’d rather forego the D/s than do that.” He paused a moment. “Doesn’t mean I’d be any different, I just wouldn’t punish you again like I did tonight.” “That’s just it. With you it’s different. I don’t feel abused, even earlier when…um…” “When I whaled the daylights out of you,” he supplied. She flushed. “Yeah,” she murmured. Brandon looked down at her face, saw the blush. “After everything we’ve done the last few weeks, I can’t believe you can still blush,” he teased. “Are you still mad at me?” she asked in a small voice. “Ah, sweetheart, I haven’t been mad for a while now. I’ll admit I was pretty angry with you. I was still angry when I spanked you at the club. But I don’t have the same kind of temper you do. I calm down quickly as a rule, you know that. But now you know; I go to full Dom mode when I’m irritated.” “Uh huh.” 175
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He grinned and turned over so she was under him. He eased inside her when she opened her thighs. “What do ya say we just try nice and slow.” “”Kay,” she whispered. It didn’t matter how he took her, she always loved it when he was inside her. She moved with him, enjoying his slow movements. He lowered his head and kissed her gently. He kept his movements gentle and easy, trying to ease her into passion instead of throwing her into it. Cassie held him to her as he moved inside her. There wasn’t the sense of urgency she usually felt, but this tenderness was so special, she started to cry, even as she moved with him. Brandon kissed her gently, teasingly, then, when he felt her tighten around him, gave her a hard thrust to send her over the edge and followed her over. When their breathing had returned to normal, he eased over his side and pulled her close, then kissed her. “Sleep, love,” he whispered. He held her till her breathing evened into sleep. He was awake for a long while. “What am I going to do with you,” he whispered. He brushed her hair off her cheek and closed his eyes. When he woke the next morning, she was gone.
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Chapter Sixteen Cassie let herself into her apartment and sat the suitcase she’d packed next to the door. She’d gotten out of bed early and tossed a few things into the bag, then left him sleeping in the bed. It was for the best, she told herself. In the end, she’d just end up hurting him. She walked into her bedroom, and realized it didn’t feel like her room anymore. It was a good thing she was off work today, because she didn’t think she’d have been able to go. Not when she felt like this. She was sure he’d wanted her to go, but hadn’t wanted to tell her. So, she’d decided to make it easy on him and just leave. She decided she’d go get the rest of her things when she knew he was at work on Monday. When the phone started to ring, she ignored it. She wasn’t in the mood to talk to anyone, especially Brandon. He’d be furious that she’d just left, but in the end, she was sure he’d realize it had been for the best. *** Brandon hung up the phone with a curse. He knew damn well she’d gone back to her apartment. He was both angry and hurt in equal measure. He worried, though, that she’d left because he’d scared her the night before, and that thought was intolerable. He needed to find out if that was the problem. He’d overdone it. That spanking in the club had been enough. Bringing her back to the house and making love to her one minute and spanking the hell out of her the next had to have confused her. It had also turned her on; which likely scared her as well. He closed his eyes against a wave of pain. He’d messed up badly. By mid-afternoon, he’d given up calling. She obviously wasn’t going to answer the phone. He’d only talked himself out of going over on the chance that she really had left because she was afraid of him. He sighed as he sat in his study on the Internet. He’d give her till the end of the day, and then he was going to go make her talk to him. 177
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He saw her log onto the Internet and frowned. What was she up to? He did a whois and discovered that she was in a BDSM chat. He changed his nickname and went into the room, but she wasn’t talking to anyone, she was just sitting there. He watched as someone spoke to her, but she ignored him. What was she doing? He finally sent her an instant message, but she didn’t reply to it. Answer me, Cassie. What the hell are you doing? he typed. Finally, he got a reply. Just sitting here. Why did you leave? he typed quickly. I’ve been worried. There was a long pause before she replied. It doesn’t matter. It was fun, but it’s over. Brandon closed his eyes against a wave of pain. Why? Cassie sat at the computer thinking about how to reply. Why did he sound so upset that she’d left? She’d done what was best for him. I just figured it would be easier this way. Brandon answered quickly, his heart racing. What would be easier? She sighed. I couldn’t leave if I’d had to talk to you, and it was for the best. I asked you a question, young lady. Why did you go? Are you going to run away whenever you’re angry with me? He thought she was angry with him? I’m not angry, Brandon. Cassie, get that sweet tail back over here! Why? Because I love you, you little idiot. Get back here. Cassie closed the window and tuned off the computer. Should she go? Her heart was racing. Did he really want her? Or was he just trying to do the right thing? The phone started to ring almost instantly, and with a sigh, she answered it. “Hello, Brandon.” “What the hell are you doing?” he demanded. “What I thought you would want after last night,” she admitted softly. “Cassie, I want you to come back.” He said the words quietly. “Please.” Her eyes closed and tears burned. “Don’t,” she said in a barely audible voice. “Don’t what? Don’t tell you I love you? Don’t worry myself? Don’t give a fuck what you do? Exactly what is it you don’t want me to do?” “I’m hanging up now,” she whispered, then shut off the phone. 178
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Brandon was in his car within five minutes. He was at her house fifteen minutes later. He didn’t bother knocking; just let himself in with the key she’d given him before. It didn’t take him long to find her. She was sitting in the living room on the couch, crying softly. He walked over to her and sat next to her, “Cassie, talk to me,” he whispered. When she shook her head, he turned her and made her look at him. “Do you love me, Cassandra? Just answer that.” She couldn’t lie to him. “Yes.” He gave her a shake. “Then what the hell is this about? Is it because of what I did last night? Did that drive you away?” She tried to lower her eyes, but he was having none of it. He cupped her face in his hands and forced her to meet his gaze. “I’m waiting.” “I didn’t want to say goodbye,” she whispered. “Are you that afraid of me, Cassie?” Hell, of course she would be after the stunt he’d pulled last night. He’d way surpassed what she’d needed or deserved. He’d been pissed, and taken advantage of the fact that she’d let him whale on her. He shouldn’t have even spanked her at home; he’d already spanked her at the damn club for her actions. Hell, it couldn’t even be called a spanking. It had been much more. She shook her head. “I’m not afraid of you at all,” she said. “You love me, I love you. You say you’re not afraid of me, although I sure as hell don’t believe that. But obviously something made you leave, so tell me what it is.” “I don’t know how to be any different,” she said, crying softly. “I knew I’d chase you away, so I thought it would be better if I just left.” He shook his head. “That makes no sense. What do I have to say to reassure you? Damn it, Cassie. I should bust your ass until you simply can’t think this bullshit anymore,” he growled. She looked at him. “Are you going to?” “No, Cassie, I’m not. Apparently, that’s what’s caused the problems between us. I want you more than I want a D/s relationship with you. You’re mine, and I’m keeping you, even if that means putting D/s on a shelf.” She gave him a sad look. “No. Don’t you see? I didn’t want you to change. I just was afraid that you’d get so angry with me that you’d want me to go. I couldn’t bear loving you and having you tell me to leave later.” 179
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“What’s it going to take for you to realize that I want you just the way you are?” he asked, keeping his voice even. He looked at him warily, not missing the fact that his too quiet voice meant he was angry. Her eyes were wide. Still, he wanted to be with her. He’d come for her. He’d even offered to give up D/s for her. “I’m sorry,” she whispered, overwhelmed with guilt. Brandon studied her for a long moment. His features hardened deliberately. He nodded stiffly. “So what now, little one?” he asked, his tone deliberate. “What do you mean?” she asked quietly. “Be sure what you want, Cassandra. Right now, I’m in a mood to whale the living daylights out of you. Even though I know you’re scared, and that I way overdid it last night. But I’m pissed, and I’m hurt that you don’t trust me enough to believe what I’ve told you over and over. I love you.” He paused a moment. “You’re bound to still be tender from last night.” She blushed and nodded. “Sweetheart, I broke my own rule. I spanked you when I was pissed off. I wanted you to be afraid enough not to want to repeat the experience, but I didn’t want to scare you away, sweetheart” he said softly. “No! I was just so afraid you wouldn’t forgive me,” she explained. “It’s not about forgiving, Cassie. You were punished— soundly. I’ve told you, I don’t hold grudges. You have to start believing that. Otherwise, the D/s portion of our relationship won’t work. And that’s ok. But you’re not getting away, Cassie. I’m not going to lose you.” He tilted her chin up. “Do you understand?” “Yes, Sir,” she said softly. She touched his cheek. “I am sorry.” “So, am I spanking you or are we going to have a relationship without the D/s?” She felt butterflies in her stomach. “I want to be your sub, too.” He stood and held out his hand. “Then come with me, love,” he said firmly. Cassie put her hand in his and walked with him to the bedroom. Her pulse was racing, she had no idea what he’d do, but she wasn’t really afraid, just wary. He released her hand and put his hands on her shoulders. She looked up at him. 180
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Brandon lowered his head and kissed her lightly on the forehead, then ran his hands through her hair. “I’m not going to take it easy on you, Cassie.” He studied her face for a long moment, and felt her shiver. “But you don’t have to be afraid, sweetheart. You know you can take one hell of a spanking.” She nodded. “Yes.” “Well, love, this will be one hell of a spanking, I promise you that. And, when it’s done, I’m going to lay you down and make love to you for the rest of the afternoon, all right? She smiled. “Very alright, Sir.” “Now, I want you to lose the jeans and panties, then come back here to me,” he ordered. Cassie nodded and unsnapped her jeans, then pulled them down and off, along with her panties. She sat them on the dresser, then walked back to him. He was standing where he’d been, at the edge of the bed. “I should take you home and take you to the study, but we’re going to make do.” “It’s ok if you want to go back to the study,” she said. He frowned at her. “I know it’s ok, Cassandra. I can do what I want to you, can’t I?” he said too softly. “Yes, Sir,” she whispered, her stomach knotting. He considered her for a long moment. He could give her a hard, short spanking and be done with it, but somehow, he didn’t think that would work for her right now. “Corner, young lady.” She nodded and scurried to the corner, putting her nose into it. She felt him walk behind her, and shivered. His voice was warm on her neck as he leaned down to her. “I’ll be back, young lady. Stay put,” he ordered softly, giving her bottom a sharp smack of warning. She jerked at the unexpected sting, and lowered her head. “Yes Sir.” Brandon looked down at her bottom. The remnants of last night’s spankings were gone, even if she was sore. He waited until he’d walked out of the bedroom to sigh. What the hell am I to do with her? He wondered if it would have been better to take her back the study. He suddenly realized that was exactly what he needed to do. He wanted to make sure that from now on, nothing in a bedroom was anything but good spankings. But, he’d let her stand there in the corner for a while and wonder. Part of him wondered if another spanking was even going to help. Hell, the spanking he’d given her last night was what had caused 181
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the problem. Another severe spanking on top of that wasn’t going to make her less afraid of him, he thought with a sigh. She equated a severe spanking with his being angry and getting even with her; and was only partially wrong, as much as he hated to admit that to himself. This was one of those times when he wasn’t at all sure that spanking her was the thing to do; yet he knew he had to. But, he mused, it didn’t have to be severe to be effective. He walked into her kitchen and got a soda out of her fridge. He remembered that she’d been on the computer. He walked to the computer and looked at what she’d been reading by going into her history. He sat and made himself comfortable. His temper increased the more he read. She’d found a website telling what a ‘good’ sub was. Certainly not Cassie, at least not by these standards. It talked about a doormat sub, not his feisty Cassie. “Cassandra!” he snapped. “Come here right now.” Cassie heard him calling and wondered what she’d done, but she walked into the living room. “Sir?” “Come here,” he growled low. “Right here.” Cassie gulped and walked over to her desk and stood next to him. She looked over to see what he was reading. “What’s wrong?” “How long have you been reading this shit?” he demanded. “A few weeks,” she said. “Why?” “You’re no longer allowed on the Internet unless I’m with you until further notice,” he said, glaring at her. “Do you understand me?” “But my job—“ He cut her off. “That’s different, and you know it.” He stood up and shoved her into the chair. He snagged two pieces of paper and a pen off the desk and sat them in front of her, after moving the computer aside. “You write for me what I told you my sub is, young lady.” When she just looked at him, he yanked her to her feet. “Don’t move,” he snapped. He pulled the chair out and moved it to the middle of the room. Cassie didn’t understand why he was so angry. “What are you so angry about?” He ignored the question. “Come here.” Cassie, suddenly self-conscious to be half-naked, walked over to where he stood slowly. 182
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“You’re right, Cassie. I am angry. You can feel a little of my feelings now.” He sat down and yanked her across his lap. He didn’t start spanking immediately, though. “I told you what I expected from you, Cassie. I told you that I love your fire—it’s one of the things that attracted me to you. I’ve told you repeatedly that I don’t want a damn doormat, haven’t I?” he said, giving her a hard slap on the bottom. She jerked. “Yes!” “And yet, you decided to go searching for answers on your own.” He spanked her again on the other cheek, hard. “Is this the drivel that made you leave?” He smacked her again. “Yes,” she admitted, squirming against his lap. Her feet were on the floor and she briefly considered getting up until he wasn’t so angry. He felt her tense and tightened his hold, reaching down and grabbing her hand, he pulled it to the middle of her back and held it. “That’s what I thought! When I’m done here, you’re going to write what I told you to write.” He smacked her again, low on her bottom. “Understand?” She yelped. “Yes.” “Yes what?” he snapped, giving her another smack. “Yes Sir,” she said quickly. He flipped her over in his lap and pulled her legs around him so she was forced to face his angry gaze. He noted that her eyes were wide and dry. They wouldn’t be dry long. “Now, are you ready to go write, or shall we continue what I started now?” “I’ll write,” she said quickly. He gave her a little kiss on her forehead. “Good girl.” He helped her off his lap and dragged the chair back to the desk and sat her down again. “Let me know when you’re done.” He picked up his soda, walked over to the couch, and sat down. He picked up a magazine and pretended to be engrossed in it as he watched her over the top of it. She was still staring at the paper, the pen in her hand, but she hadn’t written a word yet. He sighed. “Start with what I said. What I told you I loved about you.” Cassie looked over at him and loved him so much she felt tears burning in her eyes. She looked down quickly, but not quickly enough. Brandon was by her in only a moment. She felt his hand on her shoulder and looked up at him. “I know what you said,” she whispered, her voice breaking. He nodded. “Yes, you do know. I want you to write it, though. Write what it is you heard me tell you I want, and what you think I 183
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want.” He looked at his watch. “You have ten minutes. After that, I’m going to drag you over to that couch and remind you in between busting your ass, got that?” “Yes.” He nodded and went to sit back down. This time when he watched her, she was writing at last. He was extremely curious at to what she’d write, but resisted the urge to go watch over her shoulder. It was a quiet ten minutes. He’d almost talked himself out of punishing her, after last night, until he saw what she’d been reading. He walked back over when she sat the pen down. “Read it,” he ordered softly. “I can’t,” she said softly. He didn’t bother replying. He stood her up again and tossed her over his lap and began to spank her, softly at first—she was going to need a warm-up for this spanking. “Let me know when you are,” he said conversationally. He gave her a hard smack, looking at the print of his hand on her pale bottom. He continued to spank, gradually increasing the intensity of the spanks as her legs started to kick. “Ok! I’ll read it,” she said after a few moments. Her bottom was starting to really sting now. “I’ll read it.” He stopped spanking and sat her up on his lap. He picked up the paper she’d written and handed it to her. “I’m waiting.” Her voice shaking, she started reading. “Brandon wants me because he loves me, even when he’s angry with me. He l-likes it that I’m feisty and – and stubborn. He’s not going to let me chase him a-away.” She couldn’t read anymore, she was crying too hard. Brandon gently took the paper and continued reading silently. She’d written everything he’d said, and then what she’d thought he should have. “Which do you believe?” he demanded. “That you love me,” she said, crying softly. “And?” “That it’s ok that I’m me.” “Do you believe it?” he asked softly, running his hands through her hair. She nodded her head briskly. “Yes, finally I do.” He smiled gently. “I’m glad,” he said huskily. “It’s not gonna save your ass, though.” “I know.” 184
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He rubbed his hand across her bottom. “We’re not going here again, Cassie. I’m not going to want to be rid of you, but if you ever dare to run from me again like this, I’ll spank you so long and so hard that you won’t sit for a week. Understand me? I’d rather not have you as a sub at all if it means I lose you as a woman. Damn it, I need you to understand that. I really should spend the rest of the day spanking your cute butt!” She shivered despite herself. Part of her wanted him to spank her like that. “Will you?” He realized how insecure she was, and how much she needed him to get her past her guilt. “Is that what you want, sweetheart?” She was nervous, but she nodded. “I think so.” He sighed. “Cassie, you know how hard I can spank. My arm can outlast your ass.” She nodded again. “I know.” He looked deeply into her troubled eyes. “I’m going to be furious if you don’t give me your honest reactions. If you can’t promise to give me honest reactions, we’re not going to do more than the spanking that I’d already planned.” He paused for a moment, touching her soft face. His smile was a little sad. “I’d told you that you’d already gotten about the worst spanking you had to worry about a few weeks ago. I know you can take that all right. But, it won’t be enough for you now. I either have to just give you a normal spanking, or give you the severe spanking you want.” He hoped that word would make her be totally sure this is what she wanted. “It’ll hurt like hell. All the crying and pleading in the world won’t stop me.” He saw her eyes widen. Good, he thought. Maybe she would think twice about what she thought she wanted. “I-I don’t know how much I can take,” she whispered, her eyes lowered. “But I do, sweetheart. I know exactly what you can take, and I’ll push past that a little.” He could tell by her actions and reactions just when she’d had enough. He touched her cheek softly, then brought her hand to his lips and kissed her palm. “Before you decide—if we do this, when we leave here, it’s over. You’ll be spanked past the guilt and past the insecurity, I hope” “Ok,” she said. “You also have to know that I’ll use two things you haven’t had used on you.” 185
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She looked at him with those wide green eyes again, and he continued. “A belt and a switch. The belt will sting, you’ll feel it, trust me—but a switch is nasty. Are you really ready for that?” Was she? It suddenly dawned on her that it was his decision to make. “It’s not for me to decide, Sir,” she said, her eyes lowered. He hugged her till she squeaked. “What am I gonna do with you, love?” he asked, more to himself than to her. “Ok, go put your clothes back on and get your things. We’re going back home.” She liked the sound of ‘home’. “Yes sir.” She got up and turned, but he stopped her. “Just a warm up before we go,” he said gently. “Go over to the couch.” Cassie walked over to the couch and stood, watching him as he walked over toward her. His demeanor changed half way. She saw it when his eyes darkened and his jaw hardened. She shivered. Could she do this? She wasn’t so sure. She waited when he sat down on the couch. “Make yourself comfortable, little girl. You’ll be here a while.” He pointed to his lap. God, was he doing the right thing? He just wasn’t sure. He decided to let her reactions dictate what he did. Cassie placed herself over his lap and felt his hand wrap around her waist. She rested her upper body on the couch, and let her legs dangle to the floor. Brandon looked down at her pink bottom, and sighed inwardly. “Put your hands in front of you, folded. Rest your head on them, and keep them there,” he warned. “Understood?” “Yes, Sir,” she said. He waited till she’d done as he instructed, then raised his hand and started to spank her, light smacks, but he covered her entire bottom with them, top to bottom, and mid-way down her thighs. He rarely spanked her thighs, but this time he paid them as much attention as her bottom. She wiggled and her legs moved, but she didn’t move her hands. He continued to spank, a little harder now. Cassie felt her bottom start to burn, but it was certainly nothing that she couldn’t tolerate. She was surprised, really, that he was spanking her so lightly. She even managed to relax slightly, as his hand raised and fell with consistency on her bottom and legs. Brandon felt it in her back when she relaxed. He continued the spanking, very slowly increasing the strength of the smacks. He wasn’t going to spank her as badly as she thought, but he wanted her to be warmed up well, because it was the length of the 186
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spanking he wanted her to remember. And this was going to last a while. Finally, he started spanking a little harder, his hand now making rapid contact with her bottom. It was already red, and he’d barely started. He gave her another layer on her tender thighs and felt her stiffen against his hand. He eased the strength, but continued to spank, keeping his hand moving. Cassie felt tears burning in her eyes, but still, was nowhere near asking him to stop. He’d spanked her harder than this just playing with her. But those smacks on her thighs stung. She kicked her legs at a particularly hard slap on her upper thigh. Brandon forced himself to ignore her kicking, resolved to give her what she wanted and needed. He’d have to make this count, because he’d didn’t think he could to do it again. At that thought, he gave her a very hard smack on each thigh. “Oww,” she cried, trying to move away from him. She could feel the anger in him. “You’re not done yet, young lady. Kick all you want, but don’t you dare try and move away from me.” He gave her several hard smacks on her bottom. “You’re angry, what did I do?” she cried. It wasn’t the burning bottom—she could handle that. It was the anger she felt. He stopped his hand mid-spank, and rested it on her bottom. She was right. He was angry. “You knew that before we started this,” he muttered. He knew she now could sense his anger, even if he didn’t say a word. She turned her head and looked at him. “I know, but what made you angrier?” He sighed. He flipped her over and sat her on his lap. “I’m just damn determined to make sure that you’re not going to forget this, Cassie.” He hugged her. “Enough for now. Let’s go home, ok?” “Are you…” “Am I what, love?” He continued to hold her, running his hand across her burning bottom. “I’m sorry you have to,” she whispered. He tilted her chin, then brushed the silent tears off her cheeks. “You will be, love. You’ll be very sorry.” “I already am,” she assured him. “Yeah, you are.” He kissed her gently, letting her feel his love. “Cassie, we don’t have to do this. Are you sure you want this?” She nodded. 187
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“And that’s why we’re doing this, sweetheart. I’ll admit, I’ll likely vent a little of my frustration on your ass, but this is to make you feel like you’ve made amends. I’m sorry that it’s necessary, sorry that I’m going to make you cry again, but I’m not going to feel guilty. And when I’m done, believe me—you won’t either.” He kissed her again. “And before we’re done, you’re going to get mad, beg and plead, and probably a lot more. That’s ok, I can handle that. But when it’s done, it is done. There is one thing that I don’t want you to be guilty about, though. Remember, I like spanking, so, although I’d rather it was a more fun one, how I feel about you won’t change—even if I have to spank you every damn day.” She smiled at him. “You would, too, wouldn’t you?” “You bet your sweet ass! But you won’t get another spanking like you’re going to get today and like you got last night, unless it’s something very, very serious. This is for you—and for me, I guess. But if I had to do this too often, you’d start to resent me. That, I won’t tolerate.” He hugged her tightly, trying to reassure her. He warred with himself about his decision. “Ok,” she said. “You know something, the more I think about it—I think that’s exactly what we’re going to do. Every day, before we go to bed, I’m going to give you a spanking. Not like this one—but not play, either. We’ll continue to do that until you really do believe that I can spank you—and spank you hard—and still want you.” “Yes, Sir.” It still amazed her that his voice, just his voice and his intent could make her turn to jelly. She wanted that, needed it, even. She wasn’t sure she understood it fully; it just was fact. “So, knowing that, do you need a very different spanking than you’re used to? This will be more like what you got last night, not like the few punishments I’ve given you.” “Yes,” she whispered. He gave her another kiss. “Ok. Go on and get dressed. We’re going home first.” She nodded and scrambled off his lap. He watched her walk out of the room—her bottom very red.. He’d given her every possible out, and she just didn’t want it. Heaven help them both, because he couldn’t bear to have her think he’d abused her. Hell, if he was honest with himself, he’d abused her the night before, even if she didn’t consider it abuse. How the hell was spanking her on top of that going to help? Still, not spanking her would make her feel worse; he knew her well enough to know that. 188
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When Cassie came back in, she leaned down and gave him a deep kiss, holding his head to her, taking and giving all she was to him. Finally, she lifted her head. “I love you, Brandon.” But could she if he gave her the kind of spanking she wanted? “I know, sweetheart. I hope you remember that I love you too, when I’m busting your ass.” She grinned. “I will. I promise.” He picked up her suitcase and walked with her to the car. He’d made her leave the computer, reminding her that she was grounded from the Internet anyway. “Next week, I want you to get all your stuff, though. Sublet the apartment or something. You don’t need it.” She gave him a bright smile. “Ok.” He laughed. “You’re saying ok an awful lot today, little one,” he said as he opened the car door. “Feeling agreeable, are you?” “Uh huh.” “Good.” They chatted about the case as they drove home, keeping the conversation on anything but D/s. The closer they got to the house, the quieter she became, though. He understood that, and didn’t press her to talk. When they arrived at the house, he held her hand and led her into the house. He sat the suitcase down and turned her to look at him. “Now, we’re going to go outside and pick a switch.” He saw her pale slightly. “Is that something that brings back bad memories for you?” She met his gaze. “Yes, but I trust you.” How the hell could he punish her with something that she was truly fearful of when she looked at him with those exotic green eyes so full of trust. He shook his head. “Sometimes, sweetie, you confuse the hell out of me.” She grinned impishly. “Yeah, but you love it.” He couldn’t believe it. Here he was talking about giving her the worst spanking of her life and she was joking with him. “Yeah,” he agreed. “I do.”
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Chapter Seventeen He led her to the back yard and walked with her to one of the many trees in the yard. “Ok, pick your switch,” he ordered. “I’m not sure what to look for,” she admitted. Her father had always picked thick ones that would usually break and cut her, but of course, she didn’t tell him that. He knew her too well. “Tell me,” he said softly, looking deeply into her eyes. “It’s not important, Sir.” He gave her a hard look. “That wasn’t a request, young lady. Remember what I said about lies of omission? Tell me.” God, that tone got to her. “My father liked switches. They always broke, though, and I’d end up getting cut.” He closed his eyes, imagining her being beaten and found the idea intolerable. “Cassie, I—“ She took his hand and kissed it. “I trust you.” Well, hell. What could he say to that? “I won’t cut you, love. But you know it’ll hurt. This is one thing you can safeword. You’re allowed boundaries that you don’t want to cross.” “I don’t want to be afraid anymore. Ok?” “All right, little one.” He led her to a sapling and pulled of a medium-thickness branch, and handed it to her. One too thin would have a higher likelihood of cutting her tender skin. “It needs to be smooth and green. Strip off the bark.” He handed her a pocket knife. She nodded and did as he instructed when they got back into the house. She offered it to him when they got to the study. Brandon had planned on saving the switch for last, but decided to use it first. He knew she was afraid, despite her brave words. He wasn’t going to prolong her worry. “Bend over the side of the couch, love.” He stopped her when she reached for the snap on her jeans. “I didn’t tell you to take those off, did I?” “No, Sir.” “Then leave them and do what I did ask you to do,” he said softly. He followed her over to the couch and waited till she’d bent over the arm. “You have to hold still, Cassie. And promise me you won’t put your hands back.” “Yes Sir.” 190
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He heard the tremor in her voice and sighed inwardly. He wished he’d never mentioned using a damn switch. He walked to her side and placed a hand on her lower back. It wouldn’t have much of an impact through her jeans, and that was fine with him. He swung the switch and it connected on the fleshiest part of her bottom with a snap of his wrist. She flinched before it ever hit. Damn it. He didn’t prolong it. He gave her ten with it, aiming carefully for only her bottom. “Corner, little girl,” he said, helping her to her feet. Her eyes were wide when she turned. It had stung. But not as bad as she’d expected it to. The idea was worse than the actuality. She knew he hadn’t used anywhere near his full strength, though. “Thank you,” she said. He snagged her wrist as she turned to walk away. He pulled her close and hugged her. He had to. He needed it as much as she did. He did not know some Doms required a sub to say thank you when they were punished — something he’d never done, nor would he. Her thank you had been genuine. “Five minutes in the corner, little girl. You can take off the jeans, too.” He released her and watched as she took off the jeans, carefully looking for any marks from the switch. There were red lines, but no welts. He didn’t want to think about what she’d look like if he’d taken away her jeans. She stood in the corner quietly, standing very still, her back stiff. He walked over to her and stood behind her. She stiffened for a moment, and then relaxed as he wrapped his arms around her from behind. “Are you ok?” She turned in his arms. “I’m fine.” He studied her face. She was ok. The clouds had left her eyes. He sighed inwardly. They’d be back soon enough, he was afraid. He released her and put his hands on his belt buckle. He saw her eyes widen, but she didn’t move. He took the belt off and held it in his left hand, then took her hand with the other. He pulled her to the couch, sat down and pointed to his lap. Cassie looked at him warily. He’d never used a belt on her, and she was afraid. Her mind flashed to her father and she shook her head to clear it. Once more, Brandon saw the look that crossed her face. “Trust me,” he said softly. He pulled her across his lap. He took her hand and held it against her back. He was afraid she’d put it back, and he didn’t want to hit it. He raised the belt and brought it down on her bared bottom. He didn’t have much leverage, and that was 191
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ok. She jerked, but didn’t struggle. Now, a bright red stripe marred her soft bottom, right across the lines the switch had left. He steeled himself, and delivered a second, just below the first, and she jerked again. Cassie winced. The belt really did sting. She wished he’d let her keep the jeans, but was surprised he’d let her keep them for the switch. She wasn’t going to complain. At the third swish of the belt, she tensed before it struck with the expected stinging force. On the fourth, she felt tears threaten, but willed them away. It certainly wasn’t as bad as that vicious rubber paddle. She knew he was being careful, too. At the fifth, she cried out, unable to hold back, when the belt struck the spot he’d first lashed. Brandon looked down at his handiwork. Her bottom sported five vivid stripes from the belt. He sat it down and gently touched them with his fingers. The edges were slightly raised. Five with it was enough, he decided. “Still ok?” he asked, his voice soft. “Y-yes,” she whispered, relaxing now that he’d sat the belt down. “I-I’m sorry.” He continued to rub gently. “For what?” “Yelling,” she said, her voice soft. He turned her over in his lap. “Cassandra, I told you that I want you to let me know your reactions.” He stood her to her feet. “Back to the corner.” He gave her a little smack to send her on her way. Cassie scrambled to the corner, dying to rub, but not daring to. Brandon watched her for a moment, saw her hand come back a few times, but it never quite touched her bottom. “Go ahead,” he said softly. Cassie touched her bottom, and felt the marks from the belt. She shivered. How could she be spanked on top of them? She started to cry, knowing that he was giving her what she’d needed. He’d taken it easy on her, but she knew it wasn’t over. Finally, Brandon walked over to her. He turned her gently in his arms. “I tried to warn you, love. We’re not through yet.” He brushed the tears off her cheeks. “The burning will go a way in a few minutes,” he promised. He walked with her back to the couch and sat down, pulling her over his lap. She tensed immediately, but didn’t try to pull away when he wrapped a hand around her waist holding her against him. He rubbed his hand over her bottom for a long moment, waiting for the sting to ease. When he felt her relax, he raised his hand and started to spank, lightly, but constant smacks, covering her 192
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entire bottom. He knew they had to burn, though, on top of the belt. He should have saved the belt for last. She was crying, but not struggling, as he increased the strength of the smacks. He finally paused after a long while and rested his palm on her burning bottom. “Cassandra?” She turned her head and looked at him. “Yes, Sir?” Her bottom was on fire, and she couldn’t stop the flow of tears. “What are you thinking?” “Just wondering what was next,” she admitted. “Are you warmed up?” he asked, knowing that she was. “Yes, Sir,” she whispered. “Then let’s get this show on the road,” he said sternly. He lifted his hand and started spanking again, once more gradually increasing the strength behind the smacks. He laid a volley across the sit-spot, six rapid smacks on each side. She kicked her legs, but didn’t do more than cry softly as he spanked her harder and harder. Finally, she reached her hand back, trying to stop the punishing blows. Brandon stopped spanking immediately. He turned her over and looked at her. “Give me your hand,” he ordered. She held out her hand. “I didn’t mean to,” she cried. “Please don’t.” His face was hard. “You’ve been told to have me hold it if you need me to, Cassandra. I’ve spanked you a hell of a lot harder than I am right now.” He held her hand and gave her a sharp slap with the belt across her palm, then held out his hand for the other. She placed her hand, palm up, and closed her eyes, not wanting to see it coming. When the belt fell with stinging force, she snatched her hand away, rubbing it vigorously against her thigh. He stood her to her feet and pointed to the arm of the couch. “Bend over,” he said, his voice harder than it had been before. He held the belt in his hand and saw her eyes widen, then darken. Cassie glared at him. “If you do this, I’ll hate you,” she said calmly, her eyes dark. She brushed away the tears and walked to the end of the couch. Brandon stood and yanked her to her feet. He spun her around and held her shoulders in tight hands. “This is what you asked for,” he said. “Hell, you’ve been asking for it for days. Looking for a reason to run again? By God, I’ll give you reason, but I’ll sure as hell drag your ass back, too!” He eased her back over the arm of the couch. 193
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He positioned himself so he was tight against her side. He grabbed her free hand and held it tightly as he gave her the first lash with the belt, right across the center of her bottom, hard. “Count them, Cassandra.” Cassie yelped. “One,” she snapped. Well, he mused, he’d known she’d get angry. He gave her the second, low on the curve of her bottom, although not as hard as the first. Cassie tried to get away, but couldn’t. “Two.” Cassie was crying harder. “T-three,” she cried. Her bottom was on fire. “Please stop,” she begged. Brandon gritted his teeth and gave her a fourth, but not hard. Cassie knew that he was going easy now. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it!” He sighed and gave her the fifth, then paused. “I’m glad,” he said. He sat the belt down in front of her, and pulled her to her feet. He sat where she’d been and snagged her across his lap once more. It was time to finish it. He started spanking hard and fast, moving his hand from one side to the other, then centered a volley on the sit spot and finally, her thighs. “Please, no more, no more,” Cassie cried. “I can’t take anymore.” She didn’t have the energy to fight anymore. She slumped against his lap. He paused. She’d almost reached her limit. “You’ll have to.” He felt her muscles tense as he rested a hand on her burning flesh. He rubbed gently for a moment, ignoring her when she yelled at him to let her up. Finally, he eased her off his lap. He didn’t waste his breath ordering her to the corner. He just took her, grabbing the belt on the way. He stood right behind her, talking softly. “We’re almost done. Stand here and calm down.” “I-I’m sorry.” “Shhh love.” He wanted to turn her around and hold her, but couldn’t—not yet. When she’d finally calmed down, he brushed the hair off her neck and kissed her shoulder. “A little more, and it’s over.” He stood to the side and gave her five with the belt quickly, light strokes on her thighs, because her bottom really couldn’t take anymore. She shrieked and stomped her feet, but stayed where she was, sobbing. He tossed the belt onto the desk and went to the couch. He sat down, holding his head in his hands. He heard Cassie crying 194
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softly, and sighed. When he couldn’t stand her tears any longer, he walked over to her and turned her around slowly, then pulled her into his arms. “Shh, sweetheart.” He held her for a long moment, then lifted her and carried her back to the couch. He sat down and pulled her onto his lap. He held her close, just rocking her. Cassie clung to him, crying hard now. “I’m sorry,” she cried. “I know love, I know. Still feeling guilty?” he asked gently. He felt her shrug against his chest. He tilted her chin up. “Still mad at me?” She nodded her head. “Guess I stopped too soon, then,” he said gently. “But that’s ok. My hand is tired, though. Guess I’ll have to get the paddles out.” Her head jerked up so fast, he chuckled. “Thought that might get your attention. Now, tell me what you’re thinking,” he demanded. She shook her head, burying it against his strong chest. Her arms wrapped around him tightly though, as she cried. “I love you.” He smiled and brushed tears off her cheek. “I love you too, sweetheart. Did you get what you needed?” Again, she shrugged. His voice hardened. “I asked a question.” “Not really,” she said. “I didn’t think I’d get mad.” “I knew you would. I told you that you would. That was the worst punishment I’ve given you.” “I know.” Brandon flipped her over gently and looked at her red ass. There were still faint lines from the switch, and darker lines crisscrossed from the belt. “Do you need more?” Her stomach lurched. She looked over her shoulder at his hard face. “Do I?” He caressed her for a long moment. Did he give her what she seemed to need, or go with his heart that told him she couldn’t take another smack. Hell, he couldn’t leave her feeling guilty, not after what he’d already put her though with this spanking. “Go pick out a paddle. I don’t care which one.” Once more he helped her to her feet. “Go on, sweetheart. Bring me something.”
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Cassie walked over to the desk and got into the toy bag and considered what to take him. She took over the thin wooden paddle and handed it to him. Brandon took the paddle and patted his lap. He was surprised she’d picked this one, he knew she hated it. He’d hoped she’d bring him the leather one. But then, that was probably the point. She lay over his lap and he put his hand over her waist again, then pulled her free hand up to her back. He gave her a light smack with the paddle on the center of her bottom. “Oh please, no more, please,” she cried. “Are you still feeling guilty?” he asked, pausing. “I don’t know,” she cried. “But I can’t take anymore, please.” Brandon paused. “Are you done feeling guilty?” When she didn’t answer, he hardened her heart and gave her five swats in rapid succession, not letting her catch her breath between them. Then, he paused again. “Now?” She was crying so hard he didn’t know if he could swat her again, regardless of what she said. She was past her limit. He’d leave her in the damn corner an hour before he’d give her even one more smack. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” she sobbed. “I love you, please no more.” Brandon tossed the paddle aside and flipped her over. “That’s it,” he said softly. “I’m done.” He held her close for a long moment, then stood, keeping her easily in his arms and walked out of the study and into their room. He laid her on the bed on her tummy, wincing as he looked at her poor bottom. He’d promised her a hell of a spanking, and that’s what she’d gotten. At least with that spanking last night, she’d been aroused enough that it had been exciting even while it had been severe. She hadn’t had that today, so was pretty sure that in her mind, it was the worst spanking he’d given her. On the other hand, perhaps she wouldn’t run from him again. He stripped off his clothes and laid next to her, pulling her into his arms. “Shh, sweetheart. You’re going to make yourself sick.” He tried to sooth her, brushing her hair through his fingers and kissing her softly. “Shh.” If anything, she cried harder. Finally, he lay on his back and pulled her over him. “I think we’ll start your daily spankings tomorrow, love.” She nodded against his chest.
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“Wanna make love?” he asked, gently running his hands under her shirt and up her back. He knew she probably wasn’t up to it, but he wanted to make sure that she knew she was loved. She was still crying, but she nodded. “Yes, please.” “Take off your shirt, love,” he said huskily. Cassie lifted up and pulled her shirt off, then tossed it aside. She felt Brandon’s fingers as he removed the bra she wore. He rolled them so she was on her side, keeping her weight off her burning bottom. His fingers found her nipple and he rubbed it gently for a moment, smiling when she arched against his hand. Lord, but he loved her body. He moved and lowered his head and drew one peak into his mouth, sucking and flicking it with his tongue. He felt her hands in his hair as she held him to her. Finally, he lifted his head. He moved his hand down to the juncture of her thighs. “Open for me sweetheart.” Cassie opened her legs a little, giving him access. She felt his fingers move inside her, gently teasing. She was already aroused. He wondered how that had happened so quickly, when he’d busted her ass so hard a few minutes before. He continued to tease her with gentle fingers. When her legs opened more, he lifted one over his and moved to enter her, easing inside her gently with a groan. He’d never get enough of her. He kissed her, flicking his tongue over her lips, and invading when she gasped as he pulled her against his rocking hips. Cassie moaned as he moved slowly inside her. He was being so gentle, she started to cry again. Her fingers found their way into his hair as he kissed her, and she deepened the kiss. Finally, Brandon rolled to his back, pulling her with him. He helped her sit astride him, and eased her onto his shaft, going deep in a sure stroke. Cassie smiled and rocked against him, taking him as deep as she could. He moved his hands to her hips and pulled her down as he made an upward thrust of his lean hips. That was all it took. She convulsed against him, then lay over his chest. “I can’t move,” she admitted. He grinned. “Is that a good thing?” he murmured against her lips.” “Yeah,” she murmured. “It is.” Brandon moved both hands to her breasts and caressed them with gentle fingers, squeezing gently as he felt her rocking against 197
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him. When he felt her clench around him, he held her hips and thrust deep, taking his own release. When it was over, she laid splayed out over his chest. She rested her head on his chest, feeling his heart race. “I love you,” he said again. “I love you, too,” she whispered. She closed her eyes and was asleep within a few moments. Brandon held her against him and let her sleep. It had been a long afternoon for her, he mused. God, she was so responsive. He loved everything about her. Lord, could the woman take a spanking. He moved his hands to her bottom, caressing the soft flesh. Her bottom was still red and hot. He closed his eyes, holding her close.
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Chapter Eighteen He awoke several hours later to her hands caressing his chest. He opened one eye. “What are you doing, little one?” She gave him a wicked grin. “Waking you up, what else?” He laughed. “I’m awake, sweetheart.” He eased her onto her stomach and looked at her bottom. There were still faint marks from the belt, but otherwise her bottom was white again. He caressed it, stroking gently over the smooth flesh. “You know what you’re gonna get, don’t you? “ he teased her, his voice gruff. “Tell me,” she murmured. He rolled her to her stomach and lifted her hips, then positioned himself behind her. “What do you think?” he said huskily. “Hmm I don’t know, but hurry, ok?” Brandon grinned and moved behind her, holding her hips and entered her in one smooth thrust. “Better?” he asked. She nodded, arching back to meet his powerful thrusts. It was over within a few moments. She lay spent and exhausted on the bed. Brandon felt his stomach grumble and realized he hadn’t eaten a bite since the day before. He swatted Cassie’s bottom gently. “Up, little one.” She gave him a sloe look, then shook her head. “Sleepy.” He swatted her again with more purpose. “Food.” She opened one eye. “I’m not really hungry.” Brandon sat up at the edge of the bed and dragged her over his thighs quickly, holding her in place tightly. “Did you eat today?” Cassie looked over her shoulder frantically. “Are you really going to—“ His hand connected with her bottom in answer. “I forgot!” Brandon grinned. “Want a reminder?” Cassie struggled to get up. “No!” He gave her another smack. “Stop struggling, I’m not hurting you.” Cassie moaned. “I don’t want spanked again.” Brandon rested his palm on her bottom, rubbing gently. “Who gets to decide?” he said softly “Me!” she said instantly, earning herself another smack. “You,” she amended quickly. 199
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He looked down at the faint prints his fingers left and grinned. “I love your ass, ya know.” He gave her a playful tap. She tensed and the grin left his face. “I’m playing,” he said softly. “I-I thought…” She burst into tears. Brandon flipped her over in his arms. “Hey, what is this?” “I thought you were going to spank me again,” she whispered. “Sweetheart, I’m sorry you’re afraid of me now.” He held her close. “I’m not.” “Bullshit, Cassie. You’re crying over a few playful smacks. I know it’s not because you’re hurt.” He brushed the hair off her face. “I was pretty hard on you, huh?” “I deserved it,” she whispered. He caressed her bottom. “Still hurting?” “No,” she replied. “Let’s go eat and talk a little, ok? “Yeah, ok,” she said softly, lowering her eyes. “Don’t hide from me, Cassie,” he warned softly. “What are you thinking?” “I just don’t want to make you mad again,” she whispered, her voice breaking. She climbed off his lap and reached for a robe on the foot of the bed. Brandon snagged her wrist before she could walk away and pulled her back onto the bed. He leaned against the headboard and patted his lap. “C’mere,” he said softly. She looked at him for a long moment, then flopped over his lap. Of its own volition, his hand smoothed the robe up around her waist, and his hand rested on her bottom. He frowned at the marks he’d left; he didn’t like it at all. “I meant sit on my lap, love, not over it.” He caressed her bottom, and down her thighs. “I meant to give you a major spanking, little one, but I wasn’t angry with you two seconds after we got that switch, and even if I had been, seeing the look on your face was enough to convince me.” Cassie looked over her shoulder at him. “Not even when I reached back and told you I hated you?” He could tell by her tone that she didn’t quite believe him. “No, not really. Frustrated that I had to do something that I didn’t really want to do, is more accurate.” She gave him a pointed look. “You might have thought you had to strap my hands, because you’d said you would if I put them back—but you didn’t have to add the extra with the belt.” 200
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He flipped her over and sat her on his lap. He tilted her chin so she had to meet his gaze. “Yeah, I did; you know you’re not allowed to rub—it was intended to sting. And I guess you’re right, I was a little ticked off. But I did what was necessary to give you what you needed, Cassie.” “I didn’t need that,” she muttered. Brandon gave her a stern look. “Ok, but it was not your place to decide what was needed, was it?” She lowered her gaze. “No.” “Look at me, little one,” he ordered. When she lifted hooded eyes, he continued. “We talked about what was going to happen, and I gave you numerous chances to back out. You didn’t. I am sorry that you’re afraid now. But I’m not going to apologize for what I am, or who I am.” He paused a moment. “I can promise not to spank you again, if that’s what you want, though. But tell me now if it is.” “You know it isn’t,” she said grudgingly. “So, you’re doing one of two things right now. Either resenting the spanking, or trying to make me feel guilty. Which is it?” She sighed. “I’m just trying to find me again.” He grinned. “Ah, so my feisty woman is coming through?” “I don’t like being afraid of you.” He hugged her. “What are you afraid of? I kind of thought you liked getting spanked.” She shivered. “I do.” “But I hurt you.” She nodded. He sighed inwardly. “I knew I would, Cassie. You knew I would before we ever started. But you’re not bruised, and the marks left by that belt will be gone by morning. You weren’t abused, you were spanked.” “I know,” she said, starting to cry again. “I won’t ever give you more than I think you can take, sweetheart. I know I pushed that a little today, and I meant to. I’ll probably do it again sooner or later. I don’t mind your resentment so much; I half expected it. But I’m a little surprised that you’re still upset about it.” Again, she was right. He’d added the extra with the belt because she’d annoyed him. He knew damn well she couldn’t keep her hands back when the spanking got too intense. But rubbing her palm on her leg was what had earned the extra stripes of the belt; she damn well knew better. 201
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It was her turn to sigh. “I’m not really. I’m upset that I wanted it,” she admitted softly. He made her look at him. “Got more than you bargained for?” “No. I thought you’d do a lot more.” “I don’t think you could have taken another smack, baby.” She tilted her chin. “Could too.” Let’s see if she’s still afraid, he mused. He flipped her over again before she could protest, holding her down with an arm across her back. “Wanna prove it?” He lifted the robe and gave her a little smack. Cassie wiggled against him, but only to tease him. “Maybe,” she said smartly. He grinned and started spanking her softly. “I could do this all night,” he mused. Her bottom was addictive. She was addictive. Cassie relaxed and settled more comfortably over his lap. “If you insist,” she purred. He chuckled, giving her more teasing slaps. “Well, maybe just a few minutes.” He continued to spank, each one light and teasing. She was damn near purring when he decided to give her just a tiny little spanking. “Time to up the ante,” he warned, then spanked a little harder. Cassie was so aroused, she didn’t even realize he’d started spanking harder, she just closed her eyes and let the sensations flow through her. She felt his hand, even felt a little sting, but nothing near pain. Once more, her bottom was the center of her existence, but this was much different than the spanking had been earlier. Brandon rested his palm on her pink bottom. “I was going to wait till tomorrow for the first daily spanking, but let’s do one now, ok?” She’d be a hell of a lot more turned on if he continued, and he knew it. Just maybe he could remind her of the easier spankings he’d given her. “Just my hand and your bottom.” “It’s up to you.” She didn’t really want a spanking, not a real one, but didn’t tell him that. “No belts, no corners, no paddles—just us,” he said huskily. “But, when I’m done,” he continued, giving her another slap, “I’m going to make love to you again.” She loved his voice—Dom mode or not. “Please,” she said, arching against his hand. He started spanking a little harder, a little faster, but kept all the smacks on her bottom. “What are you thinking?” he asked. 202
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“Not much,” she admitted. “I’d just been thinking I love your voice.” He turned on Dom mode. “This one, young lady?” He felt her shiver and grinned. “Or this one,” he said huskily. All the while, he continued to spank, each series a little harder. “Both,” she admitted. “Oh, please, spank me harder.” “As you wish,” he said, and started spanking her in earnest now. “Not afraid anymore, are you.” It wasn’t a question. He knew she wasn’t. Her legs were kicking a little, but the muscles of her back weren’t tensing. “No, I’m not afraid,” she admitted. She started to feel the burn, but liked it. “Isn’t this supposed to be a punishment?” “Maybe a little one.” He spanked a little harder now, and faster. “But it’s ok to like it, too. He was working hard to let her see that he could spank her, even hard, and not have her need to be afraid. He’d been spanking her a long time, the warm up had prepared her for a longer and harder spanking. He spanked a little harder. “But nothing to be afraid of,” he said deeply. He let go now, spanking hard and fast. “Is it?” It wasn’t fun anymore, and was starting to really hurt. “No, I’m not afraid.” He paused, rubbing the red flesh firmly, easing the sting. “I can punish you like this, love. I don’t want you afraid of me. I know you aren’t enjoying it anymore, and that’s all a punishment needs to be usually.” At least with another sub—one that didn’t feel the need to prove herself not only to him, but even more, she was trying to prove something to herself. He stopped rubbing. “Some will be worse—if you really push or do something really stupid or dangerous—but usually just like this. I know I’ve done a lot of different spankings the last few weeks, some a lot harsher than others, but nothing is going to make me love you less. Do you believe me?” “Yes,” she said, her voice breaking. Brandon turned her over. “Why are you crying?” “I don’t know,” she said. She looked up at him with tear-filled eyes. “I think you do.” “Maybe I’m feeling a little guilty,” she admitted. “For what?” he asked gently. “I love spanking you. Maybe I’ve been frustrated quite a bit, but I get to vent that frustration. It’ll work, you’ll see.” 203
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“Want to vent a little?” He eased her over, letting her get comfortable. “Ok, tell me what you want me to do.” “Get your belt.” “Not a chance,” he said easily. But he did start to spank, putting his arm across her back again. “I’m not marking you for anything less than a major thing.” She pounded her fists against his thigh. “Yes!” He flipped her off his lap. “Let’s go.” He climbed from the bed, grabbed his robe, and left the room without another word. He pulled her into the study and pointed to the corner. Cassie shook her head defiantly, but all it got her was a sharp smack on her bottom. “That’s one.” “One what?” she demanded. He sat down and yanked her onto his lap. “There’s something called topping from the bottom. Did you read about that?” “No,” she muttered. “It’s when a sub tries to dictate what is going to happen.” “I’m not-“ She broke off with a yelp when he swatted her thigh. “You are. When you can’t talk me into what you want, you try and piss me off so I’ll do it. So far, I’ve let you get away with it. Oh, I’m gonna bust your ass, since you seem to want it so badly, but you can bet your ass that if I tell you no there’s a reason. After this—now that you know what it is—it’s not going to work. You hit me again, little girl, without a damn good reason, I’ll make sure you don’t sit for a fucking week, though, got me?” “Yes Sir,” she said, her tone flat. “But otherwise, other than playful bratting, you aren’t going to get spanked when you’re trying to top. I mean it. I’ll leave you feeling guilty until I’m damn good and ready to address it.” “Ok.” She paused a moment. “I was just trying to give you a reason to spank me so you didn’t mind doing it.” “Lady, believe me, I don’t mind. But you will.” He studied her face, saw the recognition register. “Do you know I love you?” he demanded. “Yes,” she whispered. “I love you. And I know it won’t make a difference, but I’m sorry.” He smiled. “It makes a difference.” He stood and carried her back to the bedroom and stood her next to the bed. “It makes a big difference why you’re sorry, too. Why are you sorry?” “Because I was trying to make you mad.” 204
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“Well, what do ya know, it worked. I think I’ll vent a little.” He shoved her onto the bed and followed her down, pulled his robe off, then opened hers. “After I vent a little, I’m gonna give you another spanking. It’ll be what I want it to be, not what you think you need, but what I want to do. Got that?” She looked up at him. “Uh huh.” “I want you to trust me, alright?” “You know I trust you,” she said firmly. “Turn over,” he said, his voice deep. Cassie turned onto her stomach, and felt him pull her robe off. She didn’t know if he was going to spank her or what. When he’d done this the night before, he’d been punishing her. She watched as he got in the drawer and pulled out the scarves he’d used once before. He took her left hand and tied it to the post on the bed, then moved around her and did the same with the right. He checked to make sure they weren’t too tight, then did the same thing with her feet, leaving her spread eagled on the bed. He stood at the side of the bed, studying his handiwork. Her bottom was still pretty pink from the spanking he’d given her. He patted it. “Sore?” “A little bit.” “Good.” He gave her a sharp smack. “I like this shade of pink. I’m going to keep it this color for a while.” He gave her another smack. “I really do like it this color.” He smacked her again. “What color do ya think it will be in a little while?” he asked. “Red?” “Oh yeah, it’ll be red. But it’s gonna take a long time to get that color.” He smacked her again. “Still want me to use the belt?” “Do you want to?” she whispered, trying to look at him, trying to gauge his mood. His tone was conversational and deep, but didn’t really sound angry. The bad thing was, part of him wanted to do exactly that— whale on her ass till she promised to stop driving them both crazy. “Yeah, I think so,” he finally said, making up his mind. “Don’t go anywhere.” He got a belt out of his closet. He snapped it together and saw her jerk. Cassie’s heart was racing. “I’m sorry,” she said quickly. “Yes, I know.” He snapped the belt again when he was next to her again. “Changed your mind, didn’t you?”
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“Y-yes.” She didn’t want to be tied here and him there with a belt. The waiting was worse than anything he would likely do in way of punishment. “Think about this next time, Cassandra. Make sure you’re ready to take what you ask for.” “I will,” she whispered. “Let’s make sure,” he said quietly. He bent so he could look into her eyes. “Imagine thirty or forty like this,” he said now. “You can’t move, can’t fight me, and have no idea how hard I’ll spank.” He felt her tense. He stood next to her hips and raised the belt high and brought it down on her bottom with a sharp crack. Cassie yelped. “Please do-“ Her words were cut off with a second lash across the center of her bottom. She didn’t try to hold off the tears. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” Brandon sat the belt down. “Don’t ask for things you don’t want again, Cassie. And don’t ask for things that you know scare the hell out of you!” he growled. “O-ok.” He rubbed his fingers over the fresh marks. “Now, have you had enough?” he asked softly. She nodded, crying too hard to talk. Brandon went around the bed quickly and untied her. He lay next to her and pulled her over him. He caressed her back and bottom. Her quiet sobs were tearing at him. He’d planned on a longer spanking, but just couldn’t bring himself to do it. “Shh, you’re hyperventilating. Calm down, love.” He wanted to make love to her, but not like this. “Talk to me, sweetheart.” She hiccupped. “I don’t know what to say,” she said, her voice shaking. “I know you’re angry. You didn’t have to stop.” He lifted her head. “What? Lord woman, you’ve got to be kidding. I gave you a taste of what I’m capable of. I’m a SOB, but I’m not fucking sadistic,” he snapped. “Still, you can’t seem to get it, so I’m done. No more spankings unless we’re playing. Period. Don’t even bother asking.” He sighed. “We’re going to find another way to work through this guilt of yours, little one.” He paused again. “You can’t possibly expect me to beat it out of you.” “I want you to. I can’t stand it,” she cried. “Please, Brandon.” “No,” he said flatly. He studied her face. God, she really did want him to spank her again. “We’ll figure something else out 206
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instead.” What, though, he didn’t have the first damn clue. He’d had subs before, but not like this. Most of them had been naturally submissive when he’d met them. If he’d had to punish one, it had been a hard lesson, and they’d moved on. Part of him considered giving her that damn lesson. She could obviously take quite a lot of spanking. That was apparent, but it wasn’t having the desired effect on her. It was only either making her angry, or making her guilty for needing it. “You’re topping from the bottom again, Cassie.” “No, I’m not. I’m just asking for what I need. You told me to do that!” “You’d changed your mind the second you saw that belt, Cassie.” “I shouldn’t have. You didn’t really hurt me.” “No, I didn’t. But I would if I touched you again. You’re not going to force me to do more than I feel you need. It’s not your decision to make.” He squeezed her bottom hard, and saw her wince. “This is why I’m not going to spank you. You don’t need more spanking. Cassie, I’ve spanked you more than I should because you seemed to need it; but you don’t know when enough is enough—not yet. You’ve got to trust me to know when, what, and how much.” Cassie cried softly and nodded. “I don’t know what’s wrong.” “I don’t either, honey. I wish I did. I think maybe it’s that you’re trying to prove something to yourself.” “I want to be good enough.” “You are, little one. I spent half the day trying to tell you that, spank you into believing it. I swear I’m tempted to go get that switch though. You better hope that urge is gone before I decide you’re ready to be punished again.” She gave him a wide-eyed look. “I don’t think you mean that.” “Yes, Cassandra, I do. That’s my point. I can give more than you can take without ending up hating me.” “I couldn’t ever hate you,” she said. “Really? Midway through your spanking you did.” “No I didn’t, I was just angry.” “Exactly. But I didn’t stop, did I? Next time, I won’t either. Eventually, you really would hate me, or at the very least, you’d be scared to death.” “I’m not afraid of you. I just don’t like it when you’re angry with me.” 207
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“Well, unfortunately, I can’t do anything about that. Not yet. Eventually, you won’t be really afraid of me; you won’t have more than a healthy case of the butterflies. I know how to give you those with nothing but a few words.” “Yeah, you do,” she admitted. “Really well.” He grinned at her. “That’s my job.” He sobered and touched her face softly. Her eyes were swollen and red from all her crying. God, he loved her. “I don’t want you hurt, little one. Let me drive for a while, till you’re more secure.” “Do I have a choice?” He gave her a very serious look. “Yeah, you do, actually. You can keep pushing me, driving yourself nuts, getting your ass busted for it—or—you can tell me what you’re so insecure about, and what makes you feel unworthy.” That was the key. There was something that she wasn’t telling him. “It would simplify things if you could tell me.” Her eyes darkened and lowered. “Nothing.” He rolled her over onto her back and raised himself over her. He took her hands and held them over her head, interlocking their fingers. “Did I forget to mention that I’m keeping a list?” “A list of what?” “Of all the things that I’m going to spank you for when I’m ready to spank you again. Lying was a bad place to start, little girl. You don’t have to tell me—although sooner or later you will. But don’t you dare lie to me!” “I’m sorry.” “You will be. Lying is right up there at the top of the list, and you know it.” “What do you want me to say?” “You don’t have to say anything, love. I’m just going to keep it on the list. It’s only fair to warn you.” “You’re not trying to warn me, you’re trying to scare me.” “Hmm, is it working?” “No, not really. Why are you holding me like this?” she asked. “Seemed like a good idea in case you decided to kick me or hit me again.” He released her hands. “Am I allowed to ask something?” He frowned down at her. “That’s a stupid question.” “What are you going to do when you spank me again?” He changed their positions, rolling her over him again. “Oh, I’m going to bust your ass big time. You’ll be sorry, you’ll promise to be good, and you’ll cry,” he finished softly. 208
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He was right. He did give her butterflies. “That’s…um…not really what I meant.” Sheesh, how did he manage to turn her on and scare her at the same time? He saw her eyes dilate. Sometimes she was so easy to read. “Cassie, that’s why I use a spanking as a punishment. Because even when you don’t like the punishment, there’s a part of you turned on by it. At least to the idea. Someone who likes spanked would have a level of apprehension, because it is a different kind of spanking. But not real fear. I can turn you on just by telling you what I’m going to do.” She nodded, her eyes still wide. His voice was husky, almost a whisper. “I know.” He gave her a hot look, kept his voice soft. “Stand up a minute.” Her heart was racing as she stood up. She reached for her robe and put it on. Brandon watched her, his eyes dark. He stood in front of her. “I’m going to take off whatever is covering you,” he said huskily, suiting actions to words. “Then, I’m going to ask you if you know you’ve been a naughty girl. Have you been a naughty girl, Cassandra?” She nodded, her nipples hardened and she felt herself getting damp. “Then I’m going to sit down.” He sat on the edge of the bed. “I’m going to take your hand.” He reached for her hand. “And guide you across my lap.” He pulled her over his lap. “Then, I’m going to be looking at your ass, either admiring my handiwork, or the lovely pale flesh.” Jesus. What the hell was he doing to himself? “Then, I’m going to put a hand on your lower back.” He put a hand on her back. “What am I going to do next?” he asked. Cassie couldn’t even think. “Spank me?” she whispered. He lifted his hand and brought it down in a very hard smack. “Yes.” He felt her jerk at the hard smack and smiled. “Stings?” “Yeah,” she said. “It does.” “But you know that no matter what I do…” He gave her another smack. “That I’m going to rub it all better when it’s all over, don’t you?” he said. “Yes,” she breathed the word. “But it’s not rubbing time yet, is it?” he asked. Her stomach gave another lurch. “No.” He rested his hand on her bottom, then moved it down to the edge of her bottom. “I might move your legs apart.” He spread 209
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her legs. He could feel her heat. Hell, he could spank her to within an inch of her life and she wouldn’t care right now. He smacked her thigh. “It doesn’t matter what I do, does it?” he whispered. “You want me to punish you—make you feel better again.” He smacked the other thigh. “Right, young lady?” She shivered. “Yes, Sir.” He gave her a group of five hard swats on each cheek. “It doesn’t matter what I do, does it?” Her body jerked from the force of the smacks, and she wanted more. “No,” she said. “You like knowing that I’m doing this because I love you. And because it will make everything better again.” He gave her ten more rapid, hard smacks, using the full strength of his arm. Cassie moaned, feeling the sting now. “Yes, Sir,” she agreed. “Even when it’s not what you think you want.” More hard smacks. “Because it’s what I decide you need.” “Yes,” she agreed. “Because I love you.” “So, if I decide to take you to the study and repeat earlier, you’re going to know why?” he asked, spanking her again. “Because you love me.” “Yes,” he agreed. “I love you. And I want to know what’s going on that makes you doubt your worth.” He smacked her again, hard. “Will you tell me?” “N-“ His smacked her thigh hard before she could even get that word out. “No lies.” Cassie yelped. “That hurt!” He smacked the other as well. “Yes. It was supposed to. Tell me why.” He waited for her to answer, resting his palm on the handprint. Cassie winced. “Because I lied.” “Very good.” He lifted her to her feet, then stood, looking down at her. “Don’t lie to me, I won’t tolerate that.” He touched her face, loving her. “I love spanking you. That’s a major turn on—having your trust, even when I’m whaling the tar out of you.” He led her over to a corner, gently nudging her nose into it. “And this—I get to sit and look at your well-spanked bottom. What do you get to think?” “I wonder what you’re going to do next.” He smiled; glad she couldn’t see his face. ‘Is that all?” “Sometimes I think that I’m not a child, and it’s embarrassing,” she admitted. 210
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“I love it. It’s actually as much for me as it is for you. I think that you’re my little one, my love, and I want you to remember it. I know you trust me not to humiliate you about it. It’s just part of the lesson, to let you feel submissive, doing what I want.” He turned her around. “A safe one, Cassie. You’re always safe with me. I finally know why I’ve been so angry with you.” She looked up at him. “Why?” she asked, tears falling down her cheeks. “Because I love you so much. I can’t stand your being miserable—not emotionally. I should be able to fix it. I want to fix it. I don’t mind spanking you, even when I know it’s causing physical pain; because I want you to feel better emotionally.” He sounded so sad, she couldn’t bear it. “What do you want me to do?” she asked. “I want you to let me make you tell me what hurts you so much,” he said softly. “No matter what it takes, I have to fix it. That means you have to trust me more than you ever have, sweetheart. It’s tearing you apart and I don’t like it.” “I don’t think I can,” she whispered. “Can’t tell me, or can’t let me make you?” he asked softly, brushing the tears off her cheeks with his thumbs. “Can’t tell you.” “Will you let me try and help?” he asked, his voice gentle. “How?” she asked. “You need a real emotional release. I can give you that. I can spank you till you let yourself have it. Then, you won’t feel you have to hold it in.” “Do-do you want to do that?” “Yeah, I do. You’ve given me a lot, love. God, I can’t even explain how much. I love everything about you. But I don’t want you to hurt. It’s almost always there, you know. It’s in those expressive green eyes of yours. I kept thinking you’d be able to let it go, but you can’t. I’m going to help you the only way I can. Words aren’t doing it. Loving you isn’t either.” “I don’t want to be like this.” “I know sweetheart. Come on.” He took her hand and led her to the bed again. He sat on the bed and sat her on his lap. “This isn’t a punishment, Cassie. Remember that, ok?” She was so nervous she was shaking. “Ok.” He kissed her hard. “We could try another way first.” “What?” “I could just wait for you to be ready.” 211
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‘I don’t think I can wait. I don’t want to hurt you.” He smiled gently. “It’s not about me, love. It’s about what you need to be able to be free. I don’t like your hurting, but I don’t have the right to force this on you.” “Yes you do,” she said softly. “Because I love you and trust you and I’m yours.” He nodded. “Yeah, you’re mine alright, and don’t you dare ever forget it again.” “No, I won’t.” “Tell me about your dad, Cassie.” She sighed and shrugged. “He was an asshole.” “He beat you.” “Sometimes,” she said. “Did he rape you?” he asked. “I don’t want to talk about it.” “We will anyway.” His voice was hard now. “Before the night is out, we will.” She sighed. “I don’t have a problem from that, Brandon. It was a long time ago. It’s behind me.” Mostly, it was—it had just left her needing to be in control. She was overcoming that, though; thanks to him. Perhaps she was a little insecure, but that was ok. If she wasn’t lovable, it was how she’d made herself. He’d figure it out, sooner or later. “No it’s not, little one. It still hurts you, so it’s not behind you.” Maybe he could get the answers without a single smack. “I said no.” There was more, more that he didn’t need to know. She was a freak, and she couldn’t tell him. She couldn’t stand to have him look at her as they had. Or maybe not, he mused. “I don’t need a blow by blow Cassie. I think it’s only part of it. Somehow, he made you feel inadequate. How did he do that?” “It’s not important anymore.” He would have sighed, but she’d take it as a slam. “Come on over my lap, love.” When she hesitated, he hugged her, then kissed her again. “No, I’m not even a little angry or disappointed. Remember, let me drive. We’ll start with a nice warm up.” Cassie felt him ease her over his lap. He positioned her, but this time, he put one of his legs over hers. She looked over her shoulder, a question in her eyes. “Just so I can feel you against me, and you can feel me.” He knew that within a few smacks he’d be hard. She needed to feel that. He wrapped his arm around her waist, holding her tightly 212
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against him, and took her outer arm and held it against her side. He started spanking, very light spanks, starting at the top of her bottom and working his way down and to her upper thighs. “Spanking you turns me on. I love spanking you.” He spoke softly as he continued the smacks. “Can you tell?” She wiggled. “Yes.” It felt nice, he wasn’t spanking her hard at all. He started spanking a little harder. “Even when I spank harder, and know it stings, I like it.” He still wasn’t spanking her very hard, though. “Your beautiful bottom turns nice and pink so quickly.” He continued to spank for a long time, raising and lowering his palm with moderate force and speed. She flushed. Her bottom felt nice. He was being so gentle, his voice was so soft. She could feel him hard against her legs. “Are you going to make love with me?” He chuckled. “Count on it, love.” He finally rested his hand on her warm bottom. “You’re nice and warm now.” I certainly am, she thought. She loved his hands on her. “Uh huh.” “Now, I’m going to make you hot,” he said. He started spanking in earnest now, hard stinging slaps, covering her entire bottom, then concentrating on the sit spot he so loved to spank. She started wiggling against him, as much as she could with him holding her down. “Try to relax, Cassie. Just feel.” How could she not? He was spanking her pretty hard now, her bottom was burning. Tears threatened, but didn’t fall. Still, she was turned on, too. “Okay.” She tried to relax. “Some people have to make themselves feel better by putting someone else down, or by hurting them.” He felt her stiffen at his words. He was getting closer. He kept spanking. “They get off by overpowering and degrading someone who can’t stop them. You can only hear that for so long before some part of you starts to believe it. Believe they aren’t worthy.” His hand raised and fell, harder now. He winced as he watched her bottom. She was going to be sore. “Some are strong enough to make so much of themselves, despite that.” “You’re wrong. Stop it. I want up.” “No,” he said flatly. He just continued to spank, talking softly. “Let the hurt go, love. I love you.” Cassie started to cry. He didn’t understand, “Please let me up. I want up.” 213
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He didn’t stop and didn’t answer that again. “You’re mine. I don’t want to share you, not with ghosts and bad memories.” He paused long enough to grab the belt that was still sitting on the bed. “This is me, the man that does love you.” He lashed the belt across the center of her bottom, although he had no leverage, it would still sting. His hand had needed a break, he knew her bottom did. Still, he didn’t stop, forced himself to push her on. Cassie was yelling and cursing. She struggled to get away, but of course, she couldn’t. She relaxed again, just resigned to absorb whatever he did. Brandon started on her thighs. “Tell me why you like being spanked.” “Oww, I don’t!” He chuckled at that. He paused a moment and eased her thighs apart, reaching in to her damp heat. “Liar,” he said softly. He teased her with light caresses, then harder thrusts of his fingers. “You do like it. Tell me why.” “He made me!” she screamed. Brandon slowed his fingers gradually, then withdrew them. He caressed her bottom now, his fingers firm to ease the sting. “Easy,” he murmured. “Give it a minute.” He continued to caress her “He didn’t make you like it, Cassie. He used you.” “You don’t understand! I stopped telling him to stop.” She was crying hard now, and couldn’t stop. She’d even stopped hiding when she’d known he was coming. And she’d always known; she’d seen him. She couldn’t tell Brandon that; he couldn’t understand. Brandon eased her over onto his lap, keeping her bottom between his legs so she wasn’t resting on it. He hugged her tightly and just let her cry. He closed his eyes. “Sweetheart, there’s nothing wrong with liking to be spanked. Lots and lots of people do.” “Why do you?” she finally asked. “It always fascinated me. I love watching your ass turn pink. I love when you come apart for me when I’m spanking you or loving you. Lord, you have no idea how much I love it.” His hands moved down her back. “I thought I just liked to spank, but it was more. I like being in control. But, it wouldn’t be the same if it was forced. It’s given, and given with love. That makes it wonderful. All that aside, I’d still love you if you never wanted spanked again.” 214
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He chuckled at her look of disbelief. “I didn’t say I’d be happy about it.” “He always made me feel so cheap. Called me names. He’d beat me till I’d tell him I liked it. I can’t count the number of times I couldn’t go to gym class because I had too many welts from belts or switches.” “Why’d you let me use a switch on you?” “Because it was you.” She smiled. “You held back. I knew you were.” “I don’t like switches. It’s too easy to cut skin. If I use them, it’s because something has me really wanting to drive a lesson home. You’re right, I did take it easy on you with it. I might not if I used it again.” “Why would you use something you don’t like?” That made no sense to her. It was up to him what he spanked with. “You wanted a major spanking, so I gave you one. I told you, I like to spank, but I’d be just as happy never having to really hurt you.” “I think I’d like that about now.” He grinned. “Pretty sore aren’t ya?” “Uh huh.” “My hand hurts, I think I might have bruised it,” he teased. ‘Tough.” He laughed. “What? No sympathy?” “None at all.” He was still laughing. He touched her cheek softly, then held up his hand. “Wanna kiss it better?” he teased. She took his palm and kissed it. “All better?” she asked. He smiled. “Yes. Thank you.” He hugged her again. “Are you hungry?” “A little.” “Ok, let’s go eat, then come back to bed.” “Are you going to make love with me?” she asked softly. He caressed her back, then moved his hand to cup her breast. “Oh yeah,” he assured her. “I certainly am.” She grinned. “Gonna spank me again?” He grew serious. “Not tonight, that’s for sure. You’ve had enough for today, I think.” Her bottom was sore, so she nodded. “’Kay,” she said softly. He smiled. “You know, pretty soon, we’ll get to a place where you very rarely get a serious spanking, love. I know you’re sore. I like to be able to spank you often, and I can’t if you’re hurting 215
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too much. So, let’s both try and keep punishments to a minimum, alright?” “Ok,” she agreed. He put her to her feet, than stood. He put her robe on for her, then put on his own. “We don’t need clothes, we’re coming right back to bed after we eat.” They fixed dinner together. He was in the mood for steak and grinned when she complained. “You’ll eat it, young lady,” he insisted. She muttered and sighed. “Yeah, yeah, yeah.” He laughed and gave her a gentle swat. “Behave, brat.” She giggled as she made a salad. “Why?” “Because you won’t be too sore to spank tomorrow,” he said simply. She flushed. “I am a little sore,” she admitted. Oh, he figured she was more than a little sore. She was probably a lot sore. Hell, he’d spanked her a lot today. “Yeah, I know. Probably more sore than you’ve been before, huh?” She shrugged. “Not really.” And she really wasn’t any sorer than she’d been after some of his other spankings. It wasn’t horrible, like it had been with her father. Kind of a tenderness, that made her think of the spanking that caused it. She sort of liked the tenderness. He grinned. “Maybe tomorrow we’ll try a spanking every hour.” She giggled. “You arm would fall off.” She sat the plates on the table, and then put out the silverware. “Besides, you wouldn’t have time to do anything else.” He gave her a hot look. “So?” He grabbed the salad and steaks, then came to the table, too. “Sit down and eat, little one.” She nodded and sat next to him. “It looks good.” “Of course it does,” he said arrogantly. “I’m a good cook” He studied her as she ate, knowing that she didn’t really want to eat much. “Uh huh,” she agreed, taking another bite of the steak. It really was good. He studied her as she ate. Something was still troubling her. Damn it. He’d tried spanking it out of her, talking it out of her, and loving it out of her. He didn’t know what else to try. He didn’t discuss anything serious with her, though. He wanted her to finish the food, and he didn’t think she would if he started any serious discussion. “You are off tomorrow, right?” 216
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“Yeah, are we doing anything?” He grinned. “We probably won’t leave the bedroom,” he said with a chuckle. She laughed. “Well, if you insist,” she said, taking another bite. “I suppose I can handle that.” He nodded, eating for a few moments in silence. Finally, he sat his empty plate aside. She’d eaten a little more than half the steak, and a salad. He wouldn’t argue with her about eating more. “Do you want to watch TV?” he asked finally. “Sure, if you want to.” “What do you want to do, Cassie?” he asked. “It doesn’t matter to me,” she said with a shrug of her shoulders. Brandon nodded stiffly, then took the plates to the sink. He didn’t bother washing them. Instead, he went back to the table and held out his hand to her. “C’mon,” he said softly. Cassie put her hand in his, but instead of taking her to the living room to watch TV, he went back to the bedroom. “I thought you wanted to watch TV.” “I decided to watch you instead,” he said huskily, suiting actions to words. He took off the robe and let if fall to the floor. “Ok?” Her eyes darkened and she smiled. “Umm, yeah.” He smiled. “Thought it might be.” He pulled her close and hugged her. “Good girl,” he said softly. He cupped her breasts in his hands, caressing them gently. Cassie moaned, and her legs went weak. She held on to his arms for support as she looked into his face. “What’s wrong?” “Nothing love,” he assured her. “Why?” He didn’t stop caressing her, moving his fingers to her nipples. “You just look…I don’t know.” She sensed that she’d done something wrong again, but couldn’t think of what it could be. He saw the confusion on her face, and almost sighed. She was working herself up—again—to thinking he didn’t want her. Damn it. “Cassie, just quit it. I know what you’re thinking.” He took a deep breath. “We’re not leaving this room all night,” he promised. “I’m going to love you, spank you, and love you some more.” “I thought you didn’t want to spank me anymore,” she whispered, her eyes dark. “I just meant today, sweetheart, but I changed my mind.” He reached his hand back and cupped her bottom. “I am always 217
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going to want you, Cassie. I’m going to spank and love that fact into you, until you believe it.” Her eyes widened. “Are you angry?” she whispered. His hands started to massage her bottom, teasing and kneading. “No,” he replied. “You know me well enough now to know when I’m mad, don’t you?” Cassie shrugged. Sometimes, she really couldn’t tell. He’d seem mad, then wasn’t. “I’m not sure.” He sighed. “What if I was angry, Cassie?” “I dunno,” she whispered. He moved his hands to her shoulders, looking down at her. “Look at me, little one,” he said softly. She slowly lifted her gaze and met his eyes. “Yes?” “No lying, remember?” It was her turn to sigh. “I don’t like it when you’re angry.” “That wasn’t the question. What do you think will happen if I’m angry?” he demanded. “I don’t know,” she muttered. He shook his head. “Try again, Cassie.” He hugged her, then kissed her nose. “Spank me?” she asked. He nodded. “Probably, yeah. Then what?” “Umm, then nothing.” “Exactly. Quit thinking I’m not going to want you, baby. You’re going to get tired of being spanked over it sooner or later.” She giggled. “Are you going to spank me till I believe it?” “Hmm, yeah, that’s what I’m thinking, yup.” “Well, ok, but I’m good, you know.” He smiled, and then touched her cheek. “Yeah, you are, love.” He tugged her to the bed, and sat down, then pulled her across his lap. “Um, so is this going to be a good spanking?” she asked a little warily. He chuckled. “Oh yeah,” he said, his voice husky. He rested his hand on her soft bottom, caressing the smooth skin, loving the feel of her. “If that’s what you want?” “Yeah, it is. Don’t think I’m ready for another one that hurts,” she admitted. Brandon frowned, since she couldn’t see him. “Still pretty sore? Your bottom is all white again,” he noted. “No, not really sore.” 218
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He caressed the soft skin, teasing strokes of his fingers. “Good,” he said, his voice thick. He tightened his hold on her waist, pinning her arm against her side. “I don’t like you hurting,” he admitted. After a long moment of caressing, he started to spank her softly. “Ok?” he asked. Cassie wiggled against his legs and moaned. “Oh yeah,” she said. She relaxed, just enjoying the feel of his hand. He was spanking very lightly. He smiled when he felt her relax. “You like this, don’t you?” “Mm,” she whispered. “Yeah.” He nodded, even though she wasn’t looking at him. “Me too, love. I like it when you wiggle and squirm, too.” He spanked a little harder after a long while, knowing that she’d need a deeper sensation by now. “Still ok?” She shivered, it was more than ok. “Yes,” she answered on a long sigh. “We’re going to try spankings like this for a while, sweetheart,” he murmured. “Even if you deserve a real one.” He continued to spank as he talked softly. “Why?” she asked. “Because I think this is what you need for right now, sweetheart. I think I’ve overwhelmed you the last few weeks,” he admitted. “Hell, I’ve probably spanked you more in the last few weeks than I’ve spanked another sub in a year.” She nodded. “That’s because I’m not as good as they were,” she said. He frowned at that. “No, Cassie. That’s because you matter more.” He continued to spank as he talked. “You’re more important.” “So, you spank me more because I get to you more.” He chuckled at that. “Yeah, that too,” he agreed. He continued to spank, a little harder now. “I do like spanking you, though.” She laughed at that. “No! Really?” He laughed again. “Brat!” He gave her a hard smack, then continued as he’d been doing before. Brandon eased his hand between her legs, caressing softly. “I like this, too,” he said at length. “Yeah, me too,” she said, moving against his hand. Finally, he turned her over and sat her up on his lap, then kissed her hard. “I love you, Cassie. Please believe that. Promise me you won’t run from me again.” 219
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“I’ll be here as long as you want me,” she said softly. He pulled her back and looked into her eyes. “Marry me.” “W-what?” “You heard me. Marry me. I love you, and I want to spend my life with you. Don’t you want the same thing?” “I-I don’t know what to say,” she whispered. “Do you love me?” he demanded. “Yes.” He hadn’t planned on asking her to marry him, but once the words were out, he realized that he did want that. He wanted to bind her to him in every way possible. “Then why are you hesitating?” “What if you get tired of me?” He lifted her and placed her on the bed, then moved over her. “I won’t.” He moved inside her in one smooth stroke. “You should know that by now.” “You can’t know that for sure.” He moved inside her, long slow thrusts. “I do.” She pulled his head down and kissed him. “You sound so sure.” He thrust harder. “I am.” She moved with him, enjoying the slow loving. “I’m not good at relationships,” she whispered. He leaned down his head and kissed her hard. “You’re great at this one.” He held her hands about her head, their fingers interlocked, and moved faster, harder, and deeper. “We are great together.” Cassie arched her hips, meeting his thrusts. “Yes,” she agreed. “We are.” Now, she added silently. She wasn’t sure she could bear to lose him later if she messed up too much. He could read her eyes so easily, sometimes he wondered if she knew that. He thrust hard for a few moments, and then paused, his face taut with the restraint. “Marry me.” “Yes,” she breathed the word. Brandon grinned and thrust fast and hard, taking them both over the edge, his mouth on hers. “That’s my girl,” he said at last, lifting his head. She smiled up at him. “Am I?” He kissed her hard, possessively. “Yes.” He thrust a little, feeling her tighten around him. “You are. Ya know, fiancé’s get spanked, too.” She giggled. “Are they nice spankings?” 220
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He laughed a little. “Sometimes. Sometimes they are with belts and switches, though,” he teased. She grinned. “You’re not so mean, you know.” He chuckled. “Yeah, but I can be. It would do you some good to remember that.” She realized that she really wasn’t afraid of him. Despite all she’d done, he really did want her; even when she wasn’t perfect, he wanted her. “Maybe I will,” she teased. He withdrew from her, and then flipped their positions, so she rested over him. He cupped her soft bottom in both hands. “Maybe?” He gave her a swat that made her laugh. “Maybe,” she repeated. “I sort of like being punished sometimes.” He laughed at that. He knew that a part of her did, when she wasn’t being busy being scared to death of him. “Do you now?” He reached over to the side of the bed and pulled out a short leather flogger. He had kept it out of the toy bag, because he hadn’t wanted to scare her with it. “Wanna try this?” “Is it nice?” she asked. His eyes darkened. “Find out for yourself. Roll over, love, onto your tummy.” He moved her off of him, and helped her get in the position he wanted her in. He raised her bottom on two pillows. “Trust me?” he asked softly. “Yes,” she said simply. “Good. I want to tie you to the bed, ok?” he whispered. She shivered. “How come?” she asked. The last two times he’d tied her, it hadn’t been pleasant. “No questions. Yes or no?” He caressed her bottom as he spoke, gently. She considered that for a long moment. But she knew he wouldn’t hurt her. She could always stop him. “Yes.” He got out the silk scarves and tied her to the bed spread eagled. He checked the bonds to make sure they weren’t cutting into her. He didn’t often use restraints, but he thought it was an important lesson in trust for her. “Ok?” he asked softly, caressing her bottom and lower back again. Cassie smiled. “Yes, it’s ok.” It was strange to be held like this, but still, exciting, too. “Most things,” he began softly, “can be used for pleasure. This can be used for both.” He moved her hair off her shoulders and back, and felt her shiver. “Relax, love, you’ll like this.” He ran 221
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the tassels from her neck, slowly down her back, just letting her feel the soft leather against her skin. Cassie moaned. “’Kay,” she said. She felt the tassels moving up her back again, dragging softly along her back. “Now, I’m going to give ya a little warm-up,” he said. He sat next to her, right at her hips. He started spanking gently, covering her white bottom with light spanks. This won’t hurt you either, just a nice warm-up,” he said, continuing to spank gently. Cassie loved it when he spanked like this; all gentle and soft. No sting, just a nice feeling of warmth starting to build. She loved it. Brandon kept one hand on her back so he could feel if she tensed. “Do you like this?” he asked, continuing to spank gently. “Yes,” she said on a soft breath. “Lots.” He smiled. “Ready for a bit harder?” “Uh huh,” she said, wiggling her bottom a little. He gradually increased the strength of the spanks, but kept them short of anything that could be considered painful. “Still ok?” “Uh huh,” she said again, just enjoying the sensations. “Very nice.” She forgot all about being tied up. She concentrated on just enjoying the sensations. He paused, resting his hand on her warm bottom. “Now, I’m gonna use the flogger, ok?” “Yes,” she said softly. She wasn’t sure if she’d like it, but reminded herself that she did trust him. Brandon lifted the flogger and started gently, moving it across her shoulders and back in soft caresses. “This is usually a fun toy,” he explained softly. He moved down to her bottom, and used it a little harder. “Still ok?” It felt strange, so many sensations so many places on her bottom at once, but it didn’t hurt. “Ummm,” she murmured. “It’s fine.” He smiled to himself. “Harder?” She turned her head and looked at him. “Is it gonna hurt?” He shook his head. “You won’t care if it does,” he promised huskily. God, he couldn’t get enough of her. “I promise.” He started letting the flogger fall harder on her bottom, and smiled again when she arched up to meet each stroke. He continued for a long time, doubting that she’d even realized that each stroke was quite hard now. 222
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Cassie closed her eyes and concentrated again on absorbing the sensations. She jerked at a particularly hard strike that teased the tops of her thighs. “Ouch,” she whispered. He eased up on the strokes a little. “Hurt?” “A little,” she said. “But it’s okay.” He paused and sat next to her again. “It can be used for punishment, too. But I prefer using it for fun,” he admitted. He finally untied her. “Not so bad?” He lay down again and pulled her over him. “You’re so responsive,” he admitted. “I love watching you.” She looked at him with an impish grin. “Yeah, so I gathered. That was nice—almost as nice as the velvet flogger.” “Hard on the back though, “ he said with a chuckle. “Think I need to build us a cross for it, or let you lie across the dresser top.” She giggled. “Funny, wasn’t hard on my back at all.” He gave her a little swat. “Brat!” “You love it, though,” she said firmly, her eyes bright with humor. He grew serious. “Yes, I do love it. And you,” he said deeply. ***
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The End or Is It Just the Beginning… Read book two: Some Lessons Still to Learn to read more about Cassie and Brandon, and their search for the killer! Coming Soon from Shadowrose Publishing!
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