TANTALISER Published by Linden Bay Romance, 2006 Linden Bay Romance, LLC, US Florida ISBN MS Reader (LIT) ISBN # 1-905393-33-4 Other available formats (no ISBNs are assigned): PDF, PRC & HTML Copyright © ROSE MIDDLETON, 2006 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED The work is protected by copyright and should not be copied without permission. Linden Bay Romance, LLC reserves all rights. Re-use or re-distribution of any and all materials is prohibited under law. This is a work of fiction and any resemblance to persons, living or dead, or business establishments, events or locales is coincidental. Edited by B. Perfetti Cover art by S.L. Carpenter
TANTALISER ROSE MIDDLETON
Rose Middleton Tantaliser Prologue Interview with a Rock Star Written for Sydney Daily News by Rachel Weinstein It’s every woman’s fantasy, isn’t it? A dream date with a naughty rock star. And Nicholas Saint Eve of Tantaliser is every woman’s dream. With his ruggedly long hair, his stubble-lined chin and his assortment of tattoos, he oozes sexuality, even from a photograph. So when the assignment came up to interview the gorgeous Nik, I literally jumped at the chance. Now, my mother always warned me to put on fresh underwear when I left the house - in case I got hit by a bus - but Nik inspired rebellion. So when I stepped out of my teeny tiny apartment on my way to meet him, I’d already fought a long battle with my conscience about the virtues of wearing underwear. Waiting for Nik in the lobby of the plush Hilton Hotel, I wondered if he’d be keyed up for the concert about to follow – a gig to which I had front row seats. Playing to a packed house had to kick-start anyone’s heart. He appeared with a full entourage of security, flanked on all four sides by big bulky men dressed in black and wearing earpieces. More than enough security for the President of the U.S., let alone the lead singer of a band. But my thoughts of pretentiousness were blown to smithereens when he laid those gorgeous, green eyes on me. Thank goodness I’d played it safe and dismissed any thoughts of going commando style. With a cheerful hello in his delightful British accent, Nik took my hand and pressed a hot kiss to it. Formalities out of the way, I took a seat in one of the blood red armchairs. As I did, he nodded to his men. I watched in amazement as the eight of them fanned out in the lobby, seeming to disappear right before my eyes. Small talk seemed to be Nik’s thing as I reached into my oversized bag for my trusty tape recorder and my pad and pen. He talked non-stop while I set the tape recorder on the small table between us. Resting my pad on my knee, I brought to mind the questions I’d memorised earlier in the week. RACHEL: So how do you like Australia so far? NIK: [shrugging] It’s a little like home really, though not as polluted, I think. I love the harbour. I have the perfect view from my penthouse suite. [Of course] RACHEL: Have you had much time for sightseeing?
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser NIK: We’ve been here almost a week for that reason alone. We’ve climbed the Harbour Bridge and the Opera House, we took a hot air balloon ride over the Hunter Valley, and then a jet boat ride on the harbour. You’ve got one neat little city here, love. RACHEL: You have shows planned for Sydney and Melbourne. Do you intend on going to other Australian cities in the future? NIK: Depends how it goes, I suppose. If we’re talking sold-out stadiums and increased record sales, then we’ll schedule extra shows. We can’t let down our fans. RACHEL: Before you became the lead singer of Tantaliser, you were a solo act. Why did you change your mind? NIK: It was a little lonely, out there on my own. It was great at first, no one to tell me what to do, how to sing, what songs to write. As I got older, I realised I wanted to recognise the support I had up there on stage. RACHEL: The band has been around for two years now and you’ve released two albums. Are you happy with your progress? NIK: Yeah. [Nodding and fidgeting with his shoelace] Of course, we’ve hit a small hurdle in the road recently, but we’ll move on. RACHEL: [taking a deep breath for courage] About that hurdle. I wouldn’t exactly call it small. NIK: Maybe not. But I don’t want to make a big deal out of it. RACHEL: There are a lot of critics out there who say you’ve taken the easy road and swept the death of your drummer under the carpet. What do you say in return? NIK: Screw ‘em, love. If they think that’s what we’ve done, let ‘em. It’s me and the rest of the band who have to live with Bobby’s death every day. RACHEL: And you’re still looking for a permanent replacement? NIK: [brightening] Yeah. We’re still looking for the right guy to fill Bobby’s shoes. RACHEL: Guy? You wouldn’t consider a female drummer? NIK: [laughing loudly] Show me a woman who can play like a pro, and she’s got the job, love. RACHEL: And for all those aspiring drummers out there, how would they find out about your auditions?
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser NIK: They just need to check out our website. The details are there. RACHEL: On the topic of women, there are conflicting reports about your personal life. Care to set the record straight? NIK: [winking seductively] I am straight. I don’t do other men. Never have, never will. Not that there’s anything wrong with it, hell, half my friends are gay. But I much prefer women. And for the record, I have never been with Britney or Kylie. Yes, I sang songs with them; no, I didn’t take them to bed. RACHEL: And what about a nice Aussie girl. Could you see yourself settling here one day? NIK: [laughing and relaxing a little] Maybe. There’s a lot more open space here than in London. But I’m only thirty and I’m still a party animal. I don’t expect too many women to accept that side of me. Oh, and for the record, I don’t do drugs and I don’t drink. Not any more. My habits have been well publicised in the past but I’ve overcome those evil concoctions. RACHEL: Why do you think you got into such bad habits? NIK: It’s part of the lifestyle. I was too young and stupid to resist. Thought I was invincible. Well, I soon learned my lesson, courtesy of my buddy, Bobby. We’d been friends since school and I swear, I always thought he’d outlast me. I didn’t even know he was doing that stuff. [The drugs] RACHEL: So his death hit you pretty hard then? NIK: [nodding sadly] Yes. That’s why I got cleaned up. I didn’t want to end up dying in an alley like him. Let me tell you, anyone who thinks they can do drugs and avoid those downfalls is a moron. Even if you live, your body won’t thank you for it. Hell, my liver is shot to pieces thanks to all that booze. RACHEL: So what’s in store after the tour? NIK: We’ll stick around in Sydney for a month, auditioning for a new drummer, travel to Melbourne, and then we’re back to London to flesh out some new material. Casey King, my lead guitarist, and I write all our material and we’ve started making some notes. Then we’ll hit the studio. RACHEL: You didn’t visit America on this tour. NIK: We’re not too big in the land of the free just yet. But we’re going to change that. The next album is solely for the US market.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser RACHEL: Good luck with that. Thank you for your time Nik. I’m sure we’ll hear more from you in the future.
And so with a big ending, I clicked off the tape recorder and watched the hunky Nik sigh with relief. Not once did he really relax throughout the interview, leaving this nosy reporter with about a million more questions. His bulky security boys emerged from their hidey-holes – a not-so-subtle message to let me know that time was up. I stood as Nik did, and took his outstretched hand once again. It was warm, a little sweaty, his grip firm. Thanking me for not badgering him about the death of his drummer, Nik smiled, his emerald green eyes appreciative. Guys with black hair and green eyes are just adorable. At least, this one is. And that’s when I got a crazy idea to see just how adorable he was. “My friend Charlie is an ace drummer.” “Great. Feel free to tell Charlie to come along.” Little did Nicholas St. Eve know that I’d just set him up with my best friend Catherine “Charlie” Brown. My best girl friend that is. ~ Charlie’s eyes bulged wide as she re-read the last line in the proof of Rachel’s interview, soon-to-be published in Sydney’s daily newspaper. Slamming it down on the desk, she glared across the short expanse at her best friend. “You cannot let that go to print, Rachel.” Rachel smiled, those sea blue eyes taking on an innocent expression, as if to sweetly ask who, me? Charlie only nodded and continued to glare. They’d been best friends since day one, literally. Being born in adjacent delivery wards, lying in side-by-side cots, living just down the road from each other in suburban Sydney and sharing the exact same birthday created an unshakable bond. Without siblings, they were as close to each other as blood sisters. The difference between them was that Rachel’s father hadn’t walked out. Rachel still believed in love and men and happily ever after. Beliefs Charlie had long ago left for dust. Her first boyfriend, Gavin, only proved her suspicion that men couldn’t be trusted, cheating on her with the first pretty girl who batted her eyelashes at him. And her last boyfriend…Charlie shook her mind of the despicable Roger. Rachel blinked, not at all fazed when Charlie fixed her with a no-nonsense stare. “All I said was that you’d audition for his band.” 6
Rose Middleton Tantaliser Charlie shook her head, slowly, deliberately. “Not going to happen, sister.” “Why? You’re good enough.” Glancing once again at the page-sized colour photograph of the self-confessed bad boy of rock, Charlie felt laughter bubble up inside her. “I’m better than good enough, and you know it.” “That’s a girl. Now I’ve taken the liberty of jotting down the details for you.” Predictable as ever, Rachel slid a small piece of paper with the details across to Charlie. Of the two of them, Rachel was the organised one. Everyone loved her girlnext-door manner, her polite demeanour and most of all, they loved that gentle, round face of hers. Where Rachel had soft lovable curves, Charlie had sharp angles and hard lines. She wasn’t like Miss Goody Two Shoes across the desk at all. If anyone would shoot off at the mouth, it was Charlie. That was part of the reason she’d given up on her feminine name Catherine and chosen to play the tomboy Charlie. She’d built a reputation for saying something stupid, or brutish. But she spoke what she thought, let her mind do the talking and she didn’t care anymore if it made enemies or friends. She was woman enough to stand on her own two feet and if men didn’t like it, then that was their loss. “I’m not going, Rach.” Rachel’s head snapped up as an exasperated sigh escaped her lips. “But you’d give this band the male audience they need.” Again she erupted into laughter, set one fingertip on the paper with the details and slid it back across the desk. “Men aren’t going to idolise me, darling. If that’s what you want for this band, then you should be auditioning.” As soon as Charlie lifted her finger from the paper, Rachel pushed it back. It was like a bad game of shuffleboard. “Honey, I don’t know one end of a drum kit from the other.” That made Charlie smile, gave her cause to drop the tough girl exterior. She didn’t need to play so hard with Rachel. After all, she’d spent a good portion of her school days protecting Rachel from the likes of Gavin and Roger and even Nik St. Eve. She didn’t need to take out her frustrations with life and men on Rachel. “He’s a sexist pig,” Charlie parried. “Exactly. And you’re the right person for the job.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “Men don’t change.” “I didn’t say you had to change him,” Rachel grinned. “Just bring him down a peg or three.” She winked mischievously. Charlie shook her head firmly. “I’d give my right eye to see how he’d react to you, Cat.” Of all the people she knew, Rachel was the only one she allowed to use her given name. Everyone else called her Charlie, but she couldn’t escape Rachel. And if she were honest, she needed Rachel in her life to keep her grounded. Still, Charlie shook her head no. Yeah, she was good enough to get through the auditions. And yeah, she could even see herself drumming full time. But she didn’t need the hang-ups of one Nicholas St. Eve in her life. And she sure as hell didn’t need the bad boy of rock telling her how to drum. “I’m not going. And you can’t make me.” ~ Pulling up to the curb in her hot rod Chevrolet, Charlie grumbled again at her inability to defend against Rachel’s pleas. It didn’t matter that she was a grown woman of twentyseven. Rachel always got the better of her. When Rachel did that puppy-dog thing with her eyes and donned that pretty-please expression, Charlie knew she’d lost the battle. Whether or not she liked it, she agreed to the damned audition. She would meet the revered Nicholas St. Eve. There were no two ways about it. Because if Rachel learned she’d reneged on her promise, well, that innocent little girl exterior would turn into a vision of ferocity Charlie didn’t want to deal with. Besides, she hated disappointing Rachel. Stepping out onto the street, Charlie glanced down at her grease-smeared coveralls. That damned Mustang had gotten the better of her earlier. Tinkering under the bonnet left her running late with barely a change of clothing. At least she wore something resembling rock chic under the coveralls, she thought with some relief. Still, she’d prefer not being here at all. Reaching in to retrieve her sticks from the passenger seat, she locked the mean machine and rounded the front to step up onto the pavement. “Nice wheels,” crooned the security guard. He nodded appreciatively at the new black with purple flames paint job and then whistled at the sight of the glinting new rims. “Must have cost a pretty penny.” Charlie shrugged and nodded and then shook her head. “I’m a mechanic, so yes and no.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser He laughed, nodding at her attire. “A girl mechanic with a pair of drum sticks? That’s not something you see every day.” Pulling her shoulders back defensively, she stuck out her chin in defiance of his seemingly harmless comment. “Says the stuffy uniform eyeing off my wheels.” The surprise in his eyes gave way to a strange sense of approval as he smiled. “If you’re here for those auditions,” he glanced at the warehouse behind him. “You’re going to need all the sass you can muster. I hear he’s a piece of work.” Finally, Charlie cracked a smile. “So am I.” Striding past him, she hurried into the old warehouse. Big and empty, it seemed all wrong and yet strangely right for this moment. Wrong because it was too big and far too shabby for this purpose, but so right given it was in the ass end of town. This is where bad boys liked to play, she decided, on the wrong side of the tracks. Despite the cliché, she suddenly realised this was where she liked to play too. Ahead, a line of chairs waited silently, empty save for one young pimple-faced teen. He fidgeted nervously as she approached. Eyeing him from head to toe, Charlie smiled. He seemed so out of place, but she didn’t laugh. She was out of place. Quietly, she took a seat beside the young man dressed in black leather, complete with studded dog collar. His right foot bounced nervously as the sound of drums filled the air. The audition area was cordoned off by a barrier made crudely from packing crates but Charlie could hear every word spoken. She could also hear every out of tune note and every mistimed beat coming from the drummer. What was the guy thinking? Either he had no idea how bad that sounded, or he’d thrown caution to the wind and decided to audition anyway. On one hand she pitied the poor fool, while on the other, she couldn’t help but admire the courage it took. Fool or champion, he was about to be laughed off stage. The boy beside her winced and cringed at the unkind words spoken to the guy auditioning. She couldn’t help wondering if he was having second thoughts, but then she reminded herself not to judge a book by its cover. After all, take one look at her. A woman auditioning for a band who had made it clear they wanted a man. Perhaps she should be having second thoughts. But damn it, Rach was counting on her. Counting on her to set Mr. St. Eve straight. Now that was a scary thought. “NEXT!” She heard the word shouted just as the previous victim emerged from between two slanting panels of wood. Head bowed, shoulders sagging, fingers almost dragging on the concrete; the young man didn’t look up as he left the building. Her heart went out to
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser him. Probably still in his teens, he no doubt dreamed of stardom drumming for the hottest rock band in the world. Charlie knew she’d give St. Eve a piece of her mind when she came face to face with him. Unlike the young man rising on wobbly legs beside her, she wasn’t intimidated by a man who made his money by singing and screwing every groupie in town. Hell, she’d drum her heart out to secure his approval, only to rip it to shreds by defiantly declaring she wouldn’t play for his band if they were the last band on Earth. A smile spread across her lips. Now that sounded like a plan. Why hadn’t Rachel thought of it? “Good luck,” Charlie said softly as the young man turned. He shrugged before glancing back at her. “They’ll eat me alive.” With a smile that seemed to brighten his features just a little, Charlie winked. “Honey, don’t let them get to you. They’re just grown up boys like you.” Of course he’d been right. The minute she heard him strike the kit she knew they’d devour him. It made her wonder how many of these pimple-faced, star-struck teenage boys St. Eve had listened to today. With vengeance streaking through her, she hoped it had been many. Pity for the young man now trying to audition, however, as St. Eve rudely interrupted with the instruction to, “Stop the bloody torture”. Without so much as thanks for coming, he sent the poor kid scampering away. “What the hell is going on?” he shouted. “How the hell did these kids even think I’d let them play? I’m Nik St. Eve. We’re Tantaliser. Who the hell do these kids think they are? Man, this is so screwed up. Maybe we just cut our losses right now and run like hell. I can’t stand this any more. Are there any others left to audition?” A head poked through the opening, a face Charlie recognised as the band’s lead guitarist. He grinned at Charlie before disappearing. “Ah Nik, there’s one left.” “Well, then? What are you waiting for?” he growled. “Send him through.” Charlie swallowed. Surely he had to know that whoever was sitting here, awaiting their turn, would hear every insolent word he shouted. That was all part of the façade, the bad boy rock jock making his mark on the world. She smiled, realising how much more pleasure it would bring her to turn him down. Oh, yeah. She stood and strode confidently through the small gap in the makeshift wall. Two tables sat on one side, with the four band members lazing in torn chairs. Lead singer Nik, guitarists Casey King and Justin Lagg, and keyboard artist Skeet Martin. A drum kit sat opposite.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser The second Nik saw her, he shot to his feet and grinned. She watched his eyes scour her body from top to toe and silently cursed Rachel for putting her up to this. Despite his Adonis good looks, she wasn’t about to submit to his will or bow down before him. Lord knew there were thousands of women out there who’d do that. Still, she soaked up his bronzed skin, long tousled black hair and stubbled chin greedily. He was good looking. Hell, admit it, Cat. He’s hot. But he’s also a sexist, chauvinist hypocrite and she was determined not to fall into his nice, square definition of a woman. “Well, well, well,” he drooled. “Imagine this? A female drummer.” Keeping her tough exterior intact, Charlie strode over to the table and thrust her hand to Nik. Pumping his hand firmly, she repeated the wordless introduction to each of the others. “Name?” “Charlie Brown,” she said in clipped tones. Before saying another word, she pulled apart the studded coveralls and stepped out of them. In her faded black jeans and Motley Crew T-shirt, she strutted toward the drum kit and took a seat. “What shall I play for you?” Sitting, Nik simply shrugged. “Doesn’t matter, babe.” Tilting her head to the side, she frowned. “Let’s get one thing straight, Mr. St. Eve. I’m not your babe.” He jerked his head back and blinked, disbelief washing over his features. “I’ll call you what I like, honey. It comes with being the lead singer of this band.” Shrugging, Charlie stood and walked back to the puddle of her coveralls. “Okay, nice to meet y’all,” she nodded and stooped to retrieve her clothes. “Now hang on a minute,” Casey, the lead guitarist spoke. He turned to Nik. “Apologise.” Nik blinked up at Casey. The guy had balls standing up to him like this, and if he wasn’t such a brilliant songwriter, Nik would tell him where to go. But he wasn’t apologising. And he wasn’t hiring a female drummer. No way. Who the hell did she think she was anyway? Turning back to the bleached blonde babe, he shook his head. She was a fiery one, and she wasn’t shy in defying him. He didn’t like that in a woman. But he couldn’t deny that body of hers either, long legs, curved hips, breasts just the right size. Yeah, he could take her to bed any day. But those stubborn chocolate brown eyes told him she wasn’t the type to let him. It could make for an interesting challenge. It wouldn’t make for a
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser great member of his band, however, and he didn’t have enough patience to hear her out. So he did the only thing he could think of. He stood and turned back to Casey. “I’m too tired for this shit. You listen. I’ll wait outside.” He did just that, too. Made his way to the other side of the shabby, ready-to-fall-down dividing wall. About to make his way out altogether. Until he heard her play. The sweet sound brought him to a halt. He listened. With his ears and with his brain. She was good, could even rival his old mate Bobby Dale. Her timing was impeccable, her touch perfect as every note hit the right spot. Smooth as honey and enticing his heart to beat along in time. Nik could almost hear Bobby’s voice whisper to him from beyond the grave that she’d make an exceptional addition to the band. But she was a woman, and Tantaliser was a male band. They thrived on the adoration of their legions of female fans, relied on the male fans who wanted to emulate them. They couldn’t add a woman to the mix. Hell no. Granted, she was a hot chick but that attitude grated on him already. Yet, he couldn’t move. Standing in the shadows and listening to her caress the skins, he imagined her under the spotlight and looking mighty fine in whatever she wore. He felt heat rush to his groin, the sensation taking him by surprise. So what if she was hot? Normally, he could admit that without going all teenage-horn-bag. But for the first time in a long time, his libido kicked in with the intention of making up for such a long absence. There was a time when he didn’t think he’d ever get hard again. A time when the doctors warned him all that booze was either going to leave him impotent or kill him. He tried to remember when that had been. Twelve months ago? Longer? He knew he hadn’t been with a woman for at least that long and now here he was, all needy over some babe giving him more cheek than he could stand. Her music filled his ears, while the hormones raging through his body filled his visions with images of hot, uninhibited sex. Almost doubling at the waist, he choked on a cough at the strength of the hard-on. Good God, he thought as he fell to his knees. Hands on hips, he took deep breaths and waited for the need to pass. Even as a teenager he hadn’t given in to foolish fantasy and yet right now…he squeezed his eyes shut… unsure whether he wanted the visions to vanish or continue. Somewhere, from out of some dark corner of his mind, he recalled a recent interview. That reporter, what was her name? Rachel…something. Damn her. She hadn’t mentioned Charlie was a woman. Or a damn fine looking one.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser No, he couldn’t let her join the band. Not if he got hard every time he saw her, heard her voice. Still, he couldn’t deny that the swelling and throbbing in his groin felt good. Luckily for him, she finally stopped. The silence that followed weighed heavily on his shoulders. As a bad boy, it wasn’t unusual for him to walk out, but he felt like a complete heel having walked out on her. Smart mouth or no, she deserved her credit. In two minds whether to go back, he listened as Casey spoke. “That was bloody fantastic, love,” Casey chimed. Nik knew genuine flattery when he heard it. “You’re real good. Where did you learn to play like that?” There was a brief pause before she answered. “I taught myself.” She taught herself to play? Guilt flooded through Nik, but he still wasn’t going to apologise. “School of hard knocks, eh?” Skeet, the keyboards man, piped up. If anyone knew about the school of hard knocks, it was Skeet. She chuckled, the sound almost melodic. “Something like that.” “Are you currently in a band?” Casey continued. “Yes,” she said, her voice filled with pride. “We’ve played a few parties. Nothing too big.” “So why did you come here today?” She chuckled. “A dare, of sorts. Seems I won.” Nik cringed. He’d been played and tested, and he’d failed miserably. Good to see he was still the dumb-ass backward hick from the shitty end of town. Good to see he still fit the stereotype. Well, he’d soon put an end to that. He stood, determined to go in there and set her straight, but his groin ached and he knew his flushed face would give him away. She’d know he’d been listening, know that she was right and had caught him out. Damn her. “Look,” she started, triumph in her voice. “It’s obvious you guys are after a male drummer. That’s okay, really. I’ll just collect my coveralls and be out of your hair then. Thanks for letting me play.” To his right, she appeared. Carrying those grey coveralls and her sticks, she strode through the dim warehouse. A victorious grin played on those enticing red lips, light danced in her eyes. Damn but he wanted to follow, to show her he wasn’t some meathead singer.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser It struck him that if he let her go now, he’d never see her again, never hear that talent with the skins again. But he couldn’t have her join the band. Out of the question. Confused as ever, he got to his feet. His size ten hoofs moved of their own volition, taking him in her direction. Lord, but he was in trouble now… ~ Unable to contain her smugness, she grinned up at the sun. Rachel was going to die when she heard Nik had walked out. He’d proven to be the sexist pig everyone thought he was. She loved proving Rachel wrong, and in this instance, her best friend couldn’t have been further from the truth about the all-knowing, all-conquering lead singer of Tantaliser. Oh man, Charlie practically skipped toward the Chevy. This couldn’t have gone better. Unlocking the passenger door, she opened it, threw in the coveralls and set her prized sticks on the seat. As she removed her arm from the cabin, a firm hand swung the door shut, missing her fingers by mere centimetres. She turned angrily to find Nicholas St. Eve in her face. Heat rolled off him in waves as he backed her up to the car, pressed his hardness against her and claimed her mouth. Fighting him at first, she tried to resist the heat of that tongue, those lips, but it was useless. His musky scent flowed through her as his hands clamped around her face. Slanting his lips this way and that, he possessed her mouth with expert skill. He’d probably done this a thousand times, to as many women, and yet, her heart raced and heat pooled low in her belly. Well, if he wanted a kiss, she’d bloody well give him one. Feeling him hard against her, she thrust her tongue into his mouth, the two dancing hungrily as the heat from his fingers branded her. She wedged her hands between them, flattening them against his chest. Then, with an almighty shove, she pushed him away. “Take your hands off me.” He swallowed, his lips red, his breathing ragged. “You will never join my band, babe.” She laughed, trying to cover her need to have him hard up against her again. “Because I don’t have a Y chromosome. You really are a pig.” Blinking, he shook his head. “If only you knew.” “Fine!” She huffed indignantly. “Allow me to show you that a woman always does it better. I’ll beat you at your own game, St. Eve. You won’t know what hit you.” He grinned. “Bring it on, babe.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser With that, he turned and disappeared back into the warehouse leaving Charlie dazed. With the naiveté of a schoolgirl, she pressed her fingertips to her lips and let the memory of the kiss wash over her. Pig he may be, but he sure knew how to kiss a girl stupid. Chapter 1 Staring down at her open suitcase, Charlie grimaced at the mess. Somewhere in the tangle of clothing hid a toothbrush. She just didn’t know where. Sighing, she gave up and decided to make do with furry teeth for the night. Exhausted and succumbing to jetlag, she sagged onto the king-sized bed and rested her weary head. No one told her this would be so exhausting. The long hours were killing her, the constant demand for her attention was draining, and her cheeks hurt from smiling so much. Now she understood why rock stars turned into privacy freaks. Still, she wasn’t about to give it away for a few small inconveniences. Even this flitting from city to city had started to become easier. If only she could find her toothbrush with ease. Her lips curved into a smile as her eyes drifted closed. Hotel rooms across the world had become temporary homes since her band, Mystique rocketed to superstardom. A flutter in Charlie’s belly reminded her of the moment it all began. That fateful audition where her world collided so dramatically with Nik’s. If he hadn’t come after her, she probably never would have taken this path. Four days after the audition, she hauled together five kick-ass musicians and an incredible lead singer with the voice of an angel. Two years after that kiss, she had a pile of songs her fans couldn’t get enough of. That day two years ago left her determined to beat him at his own game. Nicholas St. Eve. She let the name drift through her sleepy brain as cool air blew in through the air conditioning vent. Los Angeles was just another city on their long list of brief tour stopovers. Most bands bussed from city to city, but between the endorsements, ticket sales, album sales and the high profile investors backing them, Mystique, travelled by air. Luxurious, though jetlag was a killer. She’d done what Nik had spent years trying to do; she’d made it big in America. Oh, he’d tried…and tried…and tried. And yet she’d still beat him to the punch. American music lovers couldn’t get enough of her all-girl band brand of music. Much to Nik’s annoyance.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser She smiled again. Ah, the sweet taste of victory. Better yet, the press loved her. Thanks to Rachel, of course, she had a media profile second to none. As the band’s PR and image consultant, Rach had steered them in the right direction. Without her, Charlie suspected Mystique wouldn’t be the top line act right now. Not that she spoke to Nik. Or he to her. She didn’t need direct communication with him to know exactly what he was thinking. It was obvious when he spoke to the press, when he allowed reporters to goad him into outrageous remarks about their rival entities. The last one had been a doozy. And boy was he paying for it. His snide remark about her sexual orientation had her male fans almost breaking down Nik’s hotel door. She only laughed off the suggestion, making it all too clear she couldn’t care less what he said. He could call her a lesbian all he liked because it was only an attempt to knock her off her perch—and a lousy one at that. Chuckling at his ill-mannered attempts to surpass her current success, Charlie pressed her fingertips to her temples and gently massaged. Headaches aside, this gig wasn’t too bad. Sure she missed her life as a mechanic, the chance to let down her guard and just be Charlie, but this was too much fun. The money meant nothing to her and the prestige, even less. All that mattered was playing to a live audience, an audience unbiased by her femininity—or perhaps swayed by it, she didn’t know. A soft knock at her door stilled her thoughts. She uttered a command to enter but didn’t move. “Headache still hasn’t gone away?” Rachel closed the door silently and came to rest on the edge of the bed. This life had done wonders for Rachel, too. She’d gone from being a show biz reporter to an in-demand PR wiz. A brief fling with Tantaliser’s lead guitarist, Casey King, left her bitten by the love bug. Unwilling to compromise her credibility, however, Rachel chose to stay with Mystique. It left Charlie far too confused. On one hand, here was her best friend and ultimate believer in love, marriage and faith, giving up on that very thing to stay by Charlie’s side. Yet, on the other hand, it was obvious Rach was neck deep in love with the guy. It left Charlie feeling somewhat guilty for being the catalyst for it all. Opening one eye to look at her best friend, Charlie nodded easily so as not to shake her brain about too much. “This one’s a killer.” “Honey,” Rachel smiled apologetically and rubbed Charlie’s arm. “Is there anything I can get you?” “Some ice, perhaps?”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Still with only one eye open, Charlie watched as Rachel smiled and stood up. Over at the small bar, she grabbed a handful of ice cubes from the bucket and wrapped them in a hand towel. She returned to set the small ice pack on Charlie’s forehead before sitting on the bed again. “I suppose now’s a bad time to tell you that he’s in town, huh?” Charlie sighed, and then smiled. “Yes dear, now’s a bad time.” Damn him. He was still following her. Not that he’d admit it. No, he would just explain it away by saying it was coincidence. Their bands just happened to be in the same town at the same time. Yeah, right. “Would you like me to put in a word at the front desk? Make sure he doesn’t bother you?” Charlie almost laughed. She could imagine Nik striding up to the front desk, those long legs moving lazily but surely, and being told he wasn’t allowed in the building. Now that would be a sight: a grown man throwing a tantrum. She wouldn’t put it past him, though for his sake, she hoped like hell he was finally learning something. Learning she didn’t want him around. Learning that his star would keep sliding back down into the pools of obscurity if he didn’t start focusing on his career. He needed to start writing music again. Stop obsessing about her and Mystique long enough to let Tantaliser find its way back into the charts. Casey would surely be thankful, as would Skeet. And of course, their fans would finally have some new music to cheer about. “Nah,” Charlie sighed. “I’ll deal with him. Just keep him away from the others, okay?” Rachel nodded. Her intense blue eyes seemed sad tonight, and Charlie couldn’t help but wonder if she missed Casey. They made a great couple. Even if Charlie didn’t believe in love, she knew a good thing when she saw it. “You should go and see him,” she said before censoring her mouth. “Sorry. Didn’t mean to bring it up.” Rachel shrugged. “No biggie. Besides, we talk on the phone often enough.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “You miss him.” It wasn’t a question. Rachel could deny it all she liked in public, but here, just between the two of them, it was a reality she couldn’t escape. “Yes, but you already knew that. I like that you don’t judge us, or me.” “Never,” Charlie smiled at her life long friend. “And if you ask me…” “I didn’t,” Rachel grinned. “And please, let’s drop it.” Because it hurts too much. That was evident in the woman’s expressive eyes. Charlie did as requested, dropping the subject like a hot potato. Instead, she shifted the iced towel on her forehead, noting how wet it had gotten. The silence blanketing them was comfortable and familiar. Their years of kinship allowed them to communicate without words at times, and when Rachel removed the makeshift ice pack to massage Charlie’s scalp, no one said a word. Closing her eyes again, Charlie didn’t block the vision of Nik that popped up. Apart from the one kiss they’d shared, they hadn’t touched each other in two years. They’d come close. Excruciatingly close, in fact. At the industry awards last year. Together in a room backstage, they managed to avoid eye contact for only a couple of seconds. The instant their gazes locked, they moved toward each other. Playing out some bizarre silent mating dance, they kept an inch of sparking air between them as they stepped around in a circle. His eyes greedily stroked her body. Her fingers itched to be buried in his long, clean, silken hair. If she’d given in… Inexplicable, really. He was still a chauvinistic pig. A hypocrite. But the electricity that crackled any time they were close was explosive. It was all consuming and gave her a head rush of gigantic proportions, but she couldn’t understand how the physical urge translated into something deeper. When she managed to escape his presence, she had almost crumpled in a heap on the floor. He stirred passions in her she couldn’t explore, dreams and hopes that had nothing to do with the simmering sexual tension between them. It was one thing for her body to crave his touch, his taste, and another thing for her heart to open up to him. One thing was for certain. Nicholas St. Eve was still a bad, bad boy. Rumours about him with other women were rife. Not that she believed them. Or maybe she didn’t want to believe them. Considering the idea for all of a minute, she tossed it aside without a second thought. No, he could be with as many women as he liked because he’d never have her. She’d never give in to his wily ways. He was the kind of man who could bed a woman and leave before the sun came up. Not the kind of man she wanted to be with. “You’re thinking about him,” Rach teased gently. Her fingers on Charlie’s scalp were heavenly.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “Liar,” Charlie whispered, knowing it was she who was lying. “Right back at you kid.” Rach chuckled. “It’s okay to think about him. Unless you’re imagining the two of you naked and—” Rachel sucked in a sharp breath and slapped a hand over her mouth. Charlie’s eyes popped open, as did her mouth. “Rachel!” “Oh my God,” she giggled. “I’m so sorry. I don’t know where that came from.” Charlie smiled knowingly. “I do.” Eyebrows arching, Rachel eyed her curiously. “Really?” “Sexual frustration,” she announced as if she were some sort of expert. “You need to get laid, girl.” Of the two of them, only Charlie could speak so crudely. But it got the job done and to her surprise, Rachel nodded. Well, hallelujah, the girl finally acknowledged her womanly needs. How she got by in this business with her polite thank you’s and pleases was anyone’s guess, though Charlie loved her for it. Without Rachel’s manners keeping her civil, she’d surely piss off a thousand people in no time. “Don’t sweat it,” Charlie smiled and touched Rachel’s hand softly. “I understand.” “You do?” Rachel sounded shocked. Laughing, Charlie sat up and blinked. “We all have urges, Rach. Even me.” “And how do you deal with them?” Grinning, Charlie cocked her head to the side. The expression on Rachel’s face told her she expected something crude to come out of her mouth. She was almost right, but not this time. “I bang my drum.” Well, it sounded better in her head. The two of them laughed out loud though Charlie couldn’t help but wonder if Rachel didn’t see right through her. Since her last, unsatisfying encounter with Nik, her frustration levels were at an all time high. She needed release, and not of the drum-banging kind either. Explosive sounded more enticing, electric even better. As for orgasmic… Rachel slid off the bed, rising to her full five foot five height and setting a quick kiss on Charlie’s forehead. “I’m going to turn in. All this talk of sexual tension has me on edge. I’ll see you in the morning. We’ll check out the venue after lunch.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Nodding, Charlie stood as well and saw her best friend to the door. “Night.” Closing the door gently, Charlie leaned her forehead against it in a moment of silence. In some ways, she missed the old days. The days before everything became hectic, before time equated too strongly with money. Hanging out with her mates seemed like such a blast back then. So little responsibility, so much to see and do. Now she’d seen and done so much that she wanted a break from all the responsibility. Maybe she was losing her mind, she thought. After all, she had so much to be thankful for. The members of her band were a blast too, though they weren’t exactly roughnecks. And that was probably the hardest part for Charlie. The girls didn’t go for clowning around like the boys did. She was a self-confessed tomboy and somehow, make-up and jewellery just didn’t sit right with Charlie. Sighing heavily, she was glad the music they created entertained so many. Better still, it was music each of the band members agreed on. She jumped when the phone rang, the harsh sound shattering the night silence. Wondering what one of the girls had forgotten or needed now, she padded over to the phone and picked it up. Only she didn’t hear a woman’s voice on the other end. “I need to see you.” Nik. “What for?” she demanded. No pleasantries in this conversation. He sighed loudly. “Do I have to spell it out?” “Yep.” She knew it had to be torture for him; after all, she wasn’t exactly the type to fall at his feet and worship the ground he walked on. And yeah, she enjoyed it just a little. “You. Me. Hot, sweaty sex.” Charlie gulped. “Are you serious?” she managed, pushing the sudden lump of want in her throat aside. She wondered were he was, exactly. “Good God, woman,” he ground out in a whisper. “How serious do I have to get? I’m begging, damn it.” Charlie’s thoughts stilled. He was serious. Deadly serious if the desperation in his voice was anything to go by.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Who was this man? One minute he’s a grumbling sexist pig, the next he’s pleading with her to go to bed with him. What the hell? Had she really gotten under his skin that much? He didn’t really strike her as the kind of guy who had to beg for sex. Hell, if the rumours were true, all he had to do was open his hotel room door and usher in the next woman waiting in line. Because in truth, Nik was the hottest property in the music industry. He oozed sex appeal and made even the most prim TV reporters gush in his presence. The arrogance that came along with those good looks, however, left Charlie determined to push him away. As if struck by lightning, she realised she had snuck under his thick skin. For so long she’d thought his outspoken behaviour was a jealousy driven ploy to destroy her band’s popularity. All along, it was a ploy to make her confront him, get her within arm’s reach. The realisation should have angered her, but it didn’t. Without warning, her belly tightened and moisture pooled between her thighs. Dropping to the edge of the bed, she tried to control her thumping heart and her runaway imagination. She failed. Instead, visions of what they could look like together assaulted her senses. She could almost feel his roughened hands on her skin, smell his musky scent as he pulled her body to him… Jerking the phone away from her ear, Charlie took a deep, slow breath to calm herself down. Hearing his voice on the other end, she berated herself for giving in so easily. With a shake of her head, she straightened her spine and pulled back her shoulders. Thrusting her breasts forward, she almost pulled off the haughty demeanour until she imagined his hands on her breasts. Falling back against the bed, she brought the phone back up to her ear. “I’m here,” she sighed, defeated. “But it’s not going to happen.” “Why?” She stayed silent. Answers eluded her. “You felt it, didn’t you? Between us. Backstage last year. I swear to God I saw it in your eyes.” Again she stayed silent. Any attempt at speech now would give her away. Instead, she tried to ignore the pulsing need in her womb. “Damn you woman. I want you in my bed. Just once.” Just once?
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “To get you out of my system,” he clarified, though she wondered if it was for her benefit, or for his. “Then we can go our separate ways.” Finding her voice, she said, “You think it’ll just take one time?” “One night,” he growled, his voice deep and thick, sluicing through her veins like a poison. “Dusk ‘til dawn. More than one time, babe.” Babe. There it was again. That term of endearment that meant nothing of the sort coming from him. Lord but he was frustrating. “No.” He laughed, sinister and low, causing her to squeeze her thighs together tightly. Closing her eyes, she could feel him there, touching her, tasting her. His soft voice in her ear left her body in no doubt as to what it wanted. “You want me,” he insisted. “Inside you, hard and hot. Admit it.” His challenge called to her but her body betrayed her. “No.” “You lie badly, baby. I can do things to you that will make you beg.” Lord help her but she wanted details. “Like what?” A chuckle slipped into her ear. “I’ll take each of your nipples into my mouth, suck on them until you cry out.” Involuntarily her back arched off the bed. Suddenly it was all she could do to keep her clothes on. “Leave hot wet kisses on your skin as I make my way down south, between those trembling thighs. Slip my tongue through your swollen wet lips until I find that sweet paradise. You’ll be hot, slick, and demanding that I take you. But I won’t, not until we’ve explored every possibility.” Charlie felt her control slipping. She should hang up right now. But she didn’t. Instead, she trailed fingertips over her erect nipples, over her belly and down between her thighs. He was right. She was hot for him, more so than she’d ever been for a man before. Swallowing the thickness in her throat, Charlie opened her mouth to speak only a moan escaped, bringing a satisfied laugh from Nik’s more than capable mouth. “That’s right,” he sighed. She could almost imagine him nodding his pleasure at her loss of control. He was playing power games and she tumbled right into his trap. “Tell me what you want, baby.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser The words escaped, unbidden and far too open for her liking. “I want you,” she groaned. “Inside me...” “Hard and hot, thrusting into your softness,” he finished. God he was good. “Yes,” she dragged the word out as the walls of her vagina contracted. All she had to do was press a finger to her clit and she was gone. Did she want that? Could she afford to let him win this game? The desperation in his voice was gone, the exasperation at having her beat him in the battle of the bands replaced by sweet victory over the command of her body. “Oh Nik,” she cried out as she gave in to the need. Her fingers worked expertly through the material of her cargo pants, bringing her body to a shuddering paradise. “Oh baby,” he cried out with her, his voice filtering through the rush inside her brain to let her know she wasn’t alone. “Don’t stop now, honey,” he demanded, his breathing heavy, his words clipped. Charlie smiled wickedly. While there might be a power struggle going on here, she wasn’t out of the race by a long shot. He’d lost control as much as she had, this episode of phone sex letting her know she was still firmly wedged under his skin whether he liked it or not. Release be damned, she would exploit this for all it was worth. “Nik?” He coughed. “Yes, babe?” “Was it as good for you?” He sighed dreamily. She could almost see the after-sex radiance light his face. “Oh yeah.” “Good,” she said with a nod. “Because it’s as close to sex with me as you’ll ever get.” And with that, she hung up. ~ Damn. Nik sighed and put the phone back in its cradle. The girl’s got game. Still, he wasn’t too disappointed. She’d given him what he was after. So what if it wasn’t skin on skin sex? He’d had his first orgasm in almost three years and if it wasn’t for her, he probably wouldn’t even have discovered he was back in the hunt. He made a mental note to thank her one day, properly, and in person.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Lying back on the couch of his hotel suite, he pictured her lying on her hotel bed. Her skin would be flushed, nipples erect, eyes glazed over. All by his doing. The thought left him feeling strong and invincible. Words flitted through his head as the melody of a song took shape. While it slowly morphed in his mind, Nik paid a visit to the bathroom before grabbing pen and paper and feverishly making notes. Setting them on the table, he picked up his guitar and got to work on the tune. Feeling good, he smiled. He hadn’t written anything new in almost two long years and it was all because he’d gotten his jollies over the phone. Well, to put it mildly anyway. More importantly, it was that enigma of a woman who’d brought his creativity to a screeching halt in the first place. How ironic she would be the one to kick-start the engines again after all this time. Nik stifled a laugh and focused his attention on his guitar. After half an hour, there was a knock on his door. Casey poked his head through. A grin spread from ear to ear and if Nik didn’t know the guy, he would’ve sworn he’d just gotten laid. But not this time. No, this was more basic than that. They were back. Nik was writing again, making music. Motioning for Casey to come in all the way, Nik continued to pluck at the strings on his guitar. Once the door was closed, he broke into the first verse of the song. With you in my life I know I am strong Ready to take on the world Girl let me be your man Straddling a stool, Casey nodded. “I like it. Let me guess. Charlie?” Nik shrugged. The source of his inspiration didn’t matter, just the end product. And if phone sex did this to him, he could only imagine what real sex could do. The thought excited him and he quickly penned the next verse and a possible chorus. Before you I was an empty shell Incapable of feeling Numb from head to toe Baby I’m yours Hook, line and sinker Take me back Baby I’m yours
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser
“Shit,” Casey laughed. “There’s my man. Where the hell have you been?” Setting the guitar down, Nik pulled out a chair and sat. Staring at the words on the page, he saw the rest of the song virtually write itself. Acting like a conduit for a divine force, he finished the song and spun the paper around for Casey to see. I know I hurt you Knife through the heart But honey, you’ve a heart of gold Can you forgive me? I’ll do what it takes Walk barefoot over hot coals Jump without the ‘chute Just tell me what to do Baby I’m yours Hook, line and sinker Take me back Baby I’m yours If only you knew You breathe light into my life Warm me from the inside out I am nothing without you His mate whistled and shook his head. “We’re playing in two nights. Let’s run this through. What do you say?” Nik blinked. The rough draft of the song was just that, rough as hell and barely five minutes old. And yet, Casey thought they should give it a go. He couldn’t stop the joy that flooded through him even if he wanted to. Damn, they might just make it through this bumpy patch after all. Silently, Nik thanked God for bringing Charlie into his life. She was trying, frustrating, and downright stubborn, but she’d proven to be his inspiration. Even if he had spent the last two years remembering that kiss every single night. Even if her touch had been burned into his memory; those chocolate brown eyes and that strong jaw the last vision he saw each night. She was a part of him now and she couldn’t escape that. He wouldn’t let her. “Are you all right Nik?”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Nik nodded, standing up to work off some of the residual sexual energy. Sure, he’d found his release, but he wouldn’t be rid of it until he’d lost it with her in his arms. But he wasn’t about to let Casey know that. The guy was too closely connected to Charlie through Rachel. He’d already blabbed enough for Nik’s liking. If either of those women knew just what Charlie did to him, he was toast. They’d never let him live it down. Though, he realised glumly, he’d probably given himself away with his little boy blues at the start of the phone call. Still, Charlie wasn’t getting her hands on this piece of information. He decided it was not in his best interest for her to know she was the inspiration behind this song. Instructing Casey to keep his mouth shut about Charlie, Nik paced over to the balcony. Sliding the glass door open, he let out the artificially cooled air. The night heat hit him, fuelling the need that still burned. He never could keep anything from Casey. “You’ve got it bad for her, haven’t you?” Casey sidled up beside Nik. “But hey, if it inspires you to write great stuff and sells us more tickets, then hell, no one will know. Trouble is, what will you do next time? You can’t keep writing songs about her. Eventually she’ll figure it out.” Nik shot Casey a warning look but the man ignored him. “I don’t know what’s going on between you two, but you know she won’t drop her guard for a song or two. She’s got it in for you bad since you walked out of that audition.” “Oh,” Nik nodded slowly, a sly grin curving his lips. “Don’t worry about that. I’ve got that angle covered.” Because if he knew women, then he knew she’d be coming back for more. Next time, she wouldn’t settle for hands free phone sex. Oh, no. He smiled. She’d be wanting the real deal next time. Skin on skin. Heat inside and out. Sure as he needed oxygen to breathe, she’d be back. And next time, she’d be the one calling him. “Be careful, eh Nik?” Casey warned on his way out. “Whatever,” Nik waved him away. “Don’t get burned, man.” Nik waited for the guitarist to leave before sliding the door shut against the smog. It was the only thing he didn’t like about LA and, after spending time in cities with much cleaner air, Nik had become sensitive. Cities like Sydney, Australia. That lovely little place where he first came across the fiery Charlie. Resting his forehead against the cool glass, he willed his body to settle down. As much as he wanted the real deal, he wasn’t going to get it tonight. The air conditioning barely
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser took the edge off the heat and he decided a cold shower was in the cards. Taking a step toward the bathroom, he spied his guitar and the small tape recorder he used for writing music. Why the hell not? Propping one foot on a chair, he rested his guitar on his knee and pressed the record button. Strumming the strings as if he were actually stroking Charlie, he gave the tune a good work-through. The first time he sang the song as a ballad. The second time he gave it a rock edge, much like the rest of his music. He was, after all, a rocker at heart and that was the part of him she’d helped to re-awaken. Listening back over the rough cut, he decided to go with the rock version. Ultimately, it was the band’s decision, but as the front man, Nik had a big say. Satisfied with his night’s work, he stripped down and stepped into that cold shower after all. Chapter 2 Charlie couldn’t believe she was actually in the audience at a Tantaliser concert. Still radiating with the afterglow of the Mystique show just twenty-four hours earlier, she found herself wedged in between Rachel and a six-foot Amazonian woman. Jostled from side to side by the swaying masses around her, she couldn’t escape the fact she was here. Watching Nik do his thing. How Rachel had talked her into it was a memory tainted by adrenaline and fatigue. If she’d been clear headed, it would never have happened. Never. It wasn’t that the band didn’t put on a good show. The pyrotechnics and light displays were incredible. Not really her style, they cost too much and took away from the music. Charlie didn’t mind the hard rock Nik preferred at all. The beat defied her annoyance, coursing through her body and leaving her exhilarated and excited all at once. Her reaction was all about Nik and the phone sex that had left her only partially sated and hankering for more. Despite her declaration they’d never actually do it for real, Charlie spent a long time after hanging up trying to convince her body of the fact. His words still rang through her head, bouncing off her logic and lifelong observations of men who walked out on their women. You. Me. Hot, sweaty sex. It went a long way to proving her suspicion he’d been time warped from the Stone Age to modern day culture. Who spoke like that? As she was fast learning, anyone at the mercy of their desire to quench a certain thirst was prone to speaking in such monosyllabic phrases. She supposed in some strange, twisted way, it was a good thing his name was a single syllable. It would surely satisfy him to have a woman chant it out in the heat of the moment.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser With a little time between the Charlie succumbing to his voice on the phone and the Charlie standing in a dazed silence now, she could safely distance herself from falling into such a trap. She was certain it would never happen between them, at least, not the kind of flesh on flesh adventure he was after. “Why are we here again?” Charlie shouted to Rachel over the music. Rachel threw her an irritated glance. Good one, Cat, she thought, just try to hold a conversation in the middle of a concert with the band raising the roof. Waiting for Rachel to answer her question, Charlie scanned what section of the crowd she could see. Amazed by the diversity of fans packed into the arena, she couldn’t stop the twinge of jealousy that bit into her. She hadn’t figured out a way to entice the older crowd, the forty-something’s with a higher disposable income. And yet, despite his fading popularity, Nik had done it. Not only had he done it, he’d done it in America. She swallowed the urge to throw a rotten tomato—if only she had one handy—as the music died down. As the crowd settled, Rachel leaned in. “Just shut up and enjoy the show, okay?” Charlie tugged playfully on the outrageous red wig she’d donned for this little escapade. Coming here was bad enough. But dressing up in a disguise for the occasion? That was going too far. “I still want to know,” Charlie insisted, her stubborn streak getting the better of her. “Why are we here?” As the crowd quieted, Rachel leaned in and smiled. “Because he was at Mystique’s concert last night. Happy?” Charlie grabbed her friend’s arm. “He was what?” Laughing, Rachel patted Charlie’s hand. “You heard me.” So he was at her show? He’d come in to take a peek at the opposition without her knowing. Suspicion snaked along Charlie’s spine. Her first thoughts drifted to why he would be there in the first place. There were no two ways about it, he was acting on a secret mission. Either trying to capitalise on her mistakes or find some weakness to exploit. Well, two could play at that game. “So we’re here to see what he’s stolen?” Rachel laughed again. “No, silly.” Growling softly so as not to draw too much attention, Charlie fixed Rachel with a fierce stare. “So help you, Rach, you’d better spill it before I extract it myself.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Grinning, Rachel leaned her mouth close to Charlie’s ear. “Apparently, he’s been a busy boy since he dropped into town. I hear he’s been writing new music.” Jerking backwards, Charlie bumped into the Amazon and spun to apologise. The big, bronzed woman, with long waves of auburn hair, nodded her acceptance and then stared hard at Charlie. Oh no, Charlie thought, we’ve been sprung. Before the woman could open her mouth, however, the voice of one Nicholas St. Eve captured the crowd’s attention. How he could bring thousands of screaming fans to near silence with just a few words was mesmerising and when she turned to look at the stage, Charlie’s mouth fell open. Sitting alone on stage, with only his guitar and a mic, Nik dominated the arena. Charisma oozed from him while joy seemed to make him ten feet tall. If the look on his face was anything to go by, she knew exactly what he was feeling, “You guys have supported us and I really have to thank you,” he smiled, scanning the crowd. “So I’m going to treat you all to a brand new song. It’s called “Baby I’m Yours” and goes out to a woman who, unfortunately, couldn’t be here tonight.” A hand gripped hers and when she glanced down, she saw Rachel’s white knuckles covering her own, shaky hand. Not wanting to miss a beat, Charlie’s head snapped up as Nik began strumming his guitar. The effect of his fingers caressing the strings coupled with her memory of that kiss and that phone call left her hot and bothered. Imagining what those fingers could do to her caused her heart to thump strongly in her chest while heat gathered low. His voice over the telephone wires was bad enough and now she had vivid images to add to her fantasy. “Are you okay?” Charlie nodded but didn’t utter a word. Her mouth felt as if it had been glued shut. With her eyes trained on the rock God on stage, she could only ride out the waves of pleasure rolling through her body. Hot damn, he was good. And if she knew Nik, then this was all a part of his seduction. The lyrics to ‘Baby I’m Yours’ struck a chord deep in Charlie and the familiarity of them set her mind reeling. Oh, he probably had no idea she was right there watching him. But he’d planted the seeds of desire knowing they’d sprout on their own. He’d probably call her one more time to give the seedlings a chance to really take hold. “Charlie?” Rachel squeezed her hand hard, forcing Charlie to turn and face her. She hadn’t told Rach, her best friend forever, about Nik’s call, let alone about the phone sex. But by now, Rachel would have guessed something was up and she was too smart not to know that it had something to do with Nik.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser All the years of non-verbal communication had to count for something but for once, Charlie wanted to keep this to herself. She could almost see Rachel’s brain doing double time to figure things out. With enough time, Rachel would. So Charlie did the only thing she knew to do to stop their psychic communication. She excused herself. Pushing past the Amazon and squeezing through the crowd, Charlie didn’t look back. When she made it to the aisle, she turned and bolted up the stairs and out into the open-air tier. Despite the oppressive heat, she gulped down big deep breaths of night air. She searched for the nearest restroom but Rachel was hot on her heels. “What’s going on, Catherine Brown?” Uh-oh. Rachel had used her full name. She was in deep trouble. Stopping, Charlie turned. “I’m not talking about this just yet. Let me work it out in my head first.” A security guard took two steps toward them in a bid to prevent trouble and then, on seeing both women shoot angry looks his way, turned around and disappeared. Once they were alone, Charlie ripped the wig from her head. It felt much better to let her scalp breathe. Rachel rushed forward and tried to snatch the wig away. “He’ll never know I was here,” Charlie hissed. “Let me have a few moments of peace. This thing itches like crazy.” Coming to a standstill, Rachel suddenly lifted a hand to her wig-covered head and blushed. “You’re right.” Slipping easily into their comfortable silence, they both laughed. But it was only a cover. Deep down, Charlie’s heart was spinning out of control. He’d written that song after their phone ‘conversation’. Not that she had some fluffy notion he really liked her or cared. He was only physically attracted and maybe even that was too generous a description. When he’d picked up the phone and dialled her hotel room, he’d been acting on primal, caveman urges and she was the first woman to pop into his brain. How or why she didn’t know. Surely he had a dozen ready, willing, and able women stationed outside his door for that exact purpose. But he called her. It was only an attempt to steal back the power and control he believed she’d stolen, wasn’t it? “I’m not talking about this.” Charlie repeated. “But it’s about Nik, right?” Charlie stood unmoving. She wasn’t going to deny it, or admit it, because she sure as hell didn’t know how she felt about it. Yes it, was about Nik. But no, it wasn’t about any competition between the bands. Of course, it looked that way to anyone on the outside. Rachel wasn’t on the outside. She was right here, stuck in the middle with Charlie and if
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser anyone knew the answer to that question, then it was Rachel. The look on her face said so. The mixture of sympathy and joy in her eyes said so. “You’ll come to me when you’re ready,” Rachel nodded, pulling Charlie into one of their tight embraces. “But until then, please don’t do anything rash.” “Me?” Charlie laughed. Her question was rhetorical. Rash should have been her middle name. “Look,” Rachel took a deep breath, as they pulled apart. “We’re going to miss the end of the concert if we stay out here. Call me selfish, but I want to watch Casey a little longer. Take a cab back to the hotel and get a good night’s sleep.” Yeah, right. Get a good night’s sleep? Who was Rachel trying to kid? After feeling Nik’s presence ghosting around her for the better part of the day, seeing him in person tonight, and then hearing the words of his new song, any chance she had of getting a good night’s sleep were between zero and none. Still, she nodded placidly and set a kiss on Rachel’s cheek. She watched her best friend straighten her wig and dive straight back into the throng of the crowd pulsating to Tantaliser’s final song. Standing alone, Charlie figured it best to get the stupid wig back on her head. She needed a mirror and so she found the nearest restrooms. In the silent room, she tucked her bleached blonde locks back under the red wig and shook her head at her image. Seriously, she looked like Britney in that film clip. All she needed was a black cape and a pair of thigh high CFM black leather boots. Suddenly sure she’d just imagined Nik’s ultimate fantasy, she turned on the cold tap and splashed icy water over her face. She was losing it. Worse, she was losing it over a self-obsessed ape named Nik. No one deserved attention less than him with his hedonistic, Neanderthal take on life. And yet, she still couldn’t get him out of her mind. Or the feel of him off her body. Imagined feel, she corrected, which only made things worse. How could she allow herself to be plagued by a vision? Now, if there’d been real contact, she could justify the memory. But this was a perceived memory, and a surely over-indulged one at that. Shaking her head, she closed the tap and took a good, long, hard look at herself. Her eyes seemed haunted, sunken, tired. Her skin was unnaturally whiter than usual. Even her lips, normally bright red without lipstick, seemed pale pink. As far as her health went, Charlie was generally as strong as an ox. Okay, so she’d endured a plane ride, got her kicks over the phone, and played to an incredible crowd all in the space of three days. Surely that shouldn’t have created this stranger staring back at her.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser It had to be the stress. The worry over having him so damned close for no good reason. Over their continued coincidental meetings. Over their almost-sex. Almost? She blinked. Yeah, almost. And she had to make sure it didn’t become a reality. Being with him in the same room was out of the question. Lord, they couldn’t keep their hands off each other over the phone—figuratively speaking of course. How they’d be able to hold a civil conversation was beyond her. But she needed to find a way to exorcise him from her head because the stubborn mule had taken up residence and wasn’t leaving any time soon. Evicting him wasn’t going to be easy. Pushing away from the sink, she strode out of the restrooms and headed backstage. Sure she was about to step into a hornet’s nest and come away with too many wounds, she needed to set him straight. No more phone calls, no more contact. Nada. Zip. None. Zilch. Striding up to the security guard keeping watch over the entrance, Charlie sucked in a breath and pulled off the wig. Her only hope was that he’d recognise her and let her through. And somehow, that was exactly what happened. The big burly bloke simply smiled and stepped aside, letting her pass unheeded. Too easy. Far too easy. Worry set in as she tucked the wig under her arm and made her way through the maze that was backstage. No one should ever make it backstage so easily, which only meant one thing: he had known she would come. It was no different to backstage at a Mystique concert. Only, there were a lot more techies securing props and storing the pyro displays for the next show. Some of them looked up as she strode by, silent in their observation of her presence. Witnesses to her stupidity. Because that was exactly what this was. Stupidity. She knew it, but wouldn’t turn back. Instead, she ploughed on, grabbing Nik by the arm the second he appeared and hauling him into a small janitorial closet off to one side. ~ “Jesus, woman,” he breathed, annoyed how one of these damned women could get past his top dollar security, until he recognised who she was. He barely had his breath back from the standing ovation and now here she was, looking mad as hell and ready to skin him alive. Slamming the door shut, he blinked at the semi-
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser darkness. The shaft of light under the door lit the room enough, but he needed to get closer. With one step, he pushed her against the wall, pinned her there with his body. She didn’t protest when he raked his hands up along her curved hips and over her ribs. Her only move was to close her eyes when his fingers grazed the undersides of her breasts. He felt a quiver rush through her body and didn’t think twice. Dipping his head, he clamped his lips to the crook of her neck and filled his hands with those delightfully firm breasts. God she tasted good. Even better when he was filled with the adrenaline from the show. His erection took no effort as he licked and nibbled. Her first impatient moan gave him reason to dispense with the pleasantries while her hands in his hair brought his lips to hers in a searing kiss. He could devour her in one gulp, would do it too if she wasn’t careful. Wicked delight rippled through him as he realised this was a hundred times better than any phone call. What had he been thinking? He relished her hands in his hair, drawing his head back from hers to put just enough space between them. But the contrast between her body language and her eyes was stark. Her body was primed for him, but the expression on her face said otherwise. He realised she’d come to repeat more firmly what she’d said over the phone. That they’d never have real sex. Her eyes demanded he listen and respect her wish, but her hands drew him closer again until her tongue was in his mouth, possessing him, owning him. “No!” She ripped her lips away. “No, Nik.” “Yes,” he growled but held back. “You want it.” He forced her to look at him. “I need it.” He blew out a hot breath, a few wispy tendrils of hair dancing around her face. The desperate little boy was back, clawing and scratching until she saw reason. Until she saw they both needed this. Damn it, that they weren’t right for each other didn’t matter. Physically, it was right. “No,” she repeated. Searching her deep brown eyes, he saw she had no more explanations. But her eyes told him very clearly. No. On the other hand, her body screamed completely opposite signals. Her confusion left him unsure, and Nik had never been unsure about a woman. But he wouldn’t do anything to hurt her. Because there was no doubt that pleasuring this woman until she couldn’t see straight would devastate her right now. “What is it?” he said softly, encouraging her with light caresses to her cheek. Damn, he was in danger of becoming a gentleman. “Tell me.” She shook her head before shrugging free of their contact. The small closet didn’t exactly give them a lot of distance. Hell, he could still feel her heat tugging at him. His
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser hands itched to hold her, touch her. His lips protested at the cold air now against them. As for his erection, no cold shower would fix that. “Charlie?” “We’re not right,” she growled. “Not right for each other. Shit, you’re the love ‘em and leave ‘em type. You’re no good for me.” “So why are you here, love?” He smiled. He’d been that man, until it had nearly killed him. She bristled. He knew it was at the word ‘love’. Just as she’d informed him the first time round, she wasn’t his babe. And she wasn’t his love. But he wasn’t about to stop using the same words he’d heard and used all his life for any woman. Even if she was gorgeous as hell with her plumped lips, her flushed skin and her hooded eyes. “Stop. Stop everything. No calls. No same city bullshit, either.” He shrugged. “I can do that. But why?” Her mouth flew open but no sounds came out. Instead, she remained silent. When he stepped closer, she held her ground. He still felt the heat radiating from her, calling to him, encouraging him to lose the sensitive new-age guy in favour of the sex-starved caveman. “We shouldn’t,” she parried weakly. Nik grinned as she backed up against the wall again. He rested his body against hers, her erect nipples an unmistakable clue that she was as turned on by him as he was by her. “Do you always listen when people say you shouldn’t?” He crooned, cupping her chin and staring deep into her eyes. The dim light of the closet shielded her somewhat but he saw what she wanted. And he’d give it to her too. If only she’d say the magic word. “Nik,” she warned, her hands against his chest. He remembered the last time and decided not to make the same mistake twice. Taking her wrists firmly, he secured her arms above her head without a fight. “Please.” He winked. “Please yes?” he offered. “Or please no?” She sighed, let her head thunk back against the wall and moaned, “Yes, please.” It was all the permission he needed. Taking her mouth again, he tantalised her tongue, teased her eyes open, nudged her knees apart with his until he could slide a thigh in between hers. Heat met him and he knew that if he were to explore further, she’d be
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser wet for him. Yes. Dropping her hands, he gripped the backs of her knees and lifted her to his hips. Surprisingly, it wasn’t all one-way traffic. Her hands in his hair pulled his head closer, held him still while she explored his mouth. That hot breath fanned over him as he settled into a fevered rhythm against her, knowing there were way too many barriers here. But hey, if phone sex could work, so could this. “You still want me,” he growled in her ear. He smiled when she shuddered. “You still want me,” she repeated, her voice soft and feminine and reminding him of who started this in the first place. “Hell yes. And I’ll take you right here if that’s what you want.” He paused, waited, leaned back to look in her eyes. She did and she didn’t. That much he could read. It sucked that he couldn’t work out why. “I’m sorry.” “Why?” She shook her head, tried to wriggle free. He held her, made her look at him, be honest with him. “It’s too complicated.” He grunted a laugh. “Look who you’re talking to. Complicated?” He raised an eyebrow. “Shit. Complicated is my middle name, babe.” “I don’t trust you.” He nodded. “I know. But are you telling me you’re after white picket fences and a labradoodle?” She chuckled softly. “No, no labra-doodles.” “Are you telling me the other night wasn’t incredible?” She frowned and leaned her face close to his. Heat smacked him hard. “Incredible, but ultimately only part-way there, babe.” It was all he could do not to come. Yeah, the girl’s got game, he thought, rocking his hips gently. He felt his hardened bulge fit neatly between her thighs and wished like hell he was buried inside her. Not knowing what she wanted, he pressed a kiss to the hollow of her throat and set her back on her feet. “Thank you,” she whispered.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Nik shook his head. “Don’t thank me. I don’t understand what the hell’s going on. The way I see it, it’s pretty clear. I want you, you want me. We’ll worry about what comes after that later. What’s so wrong with that?” Charlie sighed. What was so wrong with that? After all, she didn’t believe in happily ever after. Not after seeing her father leave for a packet of cigarettes and never return. And definitely not after seeing him years later with some woman half his age and a new child on the way. That was what had been wrong with her and Gavin. So desperate to believe in everlasting love, she forgave him for his first misdemeanour. Then she overlooked the second slight. It wasn’t until his third affair that she’d snapped and booted him out of their shared apartment. But it wasn’t just her patience that had been broken; it had been what little faith she’d had as well. Staring up into Nik’s confused eyes, she wondered why they couldn’t have a purely physical affair. He didn’t want happily every after. Nor did she. If they kept it simple, no one would get hurt. Would they? “Nik,” she shook her head. “I don’t…” “Hush,” he pressed a finger to her lips, stopping her mid-sentence. Just the touch of his skin brought her body away from the wall and against his. “You don’t need to answer me now, gorgeous,” he kissed her temple. Soft and sweet and hot all at the same time. How did he do that? “Sleep on it.” And there it was again. That good night’s sleep. Fat chance, she thought ruefully. “Nik,” she started again, a little unsure of just what she was going to say when his lips crashed against hers, shaking her to the core. “Shut up, woman,” he growled, his lips moving against hers. “I’m trying to do the right thing here.” Charlie smiled. She didn’t think Nik was capable of doing the right thing. Still, she respected his plea and kept her mouth closed. Until she realised where she was and just how many stagehands would be lurking outside. Her eyes pulled wide as she feared she wouldn’t get out without some tabloid splashing her photo across the front page. Before she could speak, he bent and retrieved the wig she’d dropped. “Just follow my lead,” he winked, fitting the disguise back over her head. His eyes held hers in a heated stare as he tucked away her telltale bleached blonde locks. He rolled her jean jacket off her shoulders, replacing the item with his leather one
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser and set his own pair of shades over her eyes. She added mind reading to his growing list of talents as he turned and fiddled with something behind him. Instantly light illuminated the room as the smell of burning paper caught her nose. Heart racing, Charlie grabbed Nik by the shoulder and spun him around. “Are you crazy?” she hissed. He smiled, those fine lips spreading lazily into a naughty grin. “I’m such a bad boy.” Then he ducked and lifted her over his shoulder. Folding at the waist, she could only hold on for dear life as he pulled the door open and shouted FIRE to everyone backstage. As workers ran toward the cause of the commotion, Nik slipped out the back with Charlie draped over his shoulder. Great, she thought, when the cold night air of the loading dock hit her square on the face. Real caveman stuff, this was. And she would lecture him about her ability to walk as he set her down. Only the closeness of his body to hers, their narrow escape, the darkened loading bay and the memory of his hardness pressed up between her thighs blindsided her. In his arms again, she didn’t put up a fight when he plastered his lips to hers in a kiss that rattled all the way down her spine and then back up. The man really knew how to kiss. “Will you be all right to get back to your hotel?” He asked when he broke away, breathing hard and looking regretful. For one insane second, she contemplated going back to his room. Then she realised that if Rachel got back to the hotel before she did, trouble would await her. She wasn’t in the mood to explain anything to Rachel now. So she nodded silently before throwing herself at him with total abandon. Lips and heat and roving hands urged her to stay. It had never, ever felt this good to be with a man. Why did he have to be a bad boy rocker? Why couldn’t he be Mr. Mum looking for his ever after? “Go,” he ordered, holding her at arm’s length. “Now! I should get back.” Charlie took a step and then hesitated. When she turned back, he smiled his deliciously wicked bad boy smile and pointed at her. “Told you,” he gloated. “You still want me.” As playfulness washed over her, Charlie poked out her tongue then took off at a run in the opposite direction. Chapter 3 San Francisco reminded Charlie of Sydney. Wandering the streets lining the bay, taking tramcar rides, and then a bus trip over the Golden Gate Bridge, she really felt at home.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Calm and relaxed, she enjoyed the company of her band members and Rachel as they were treated to a cruise on the bay. Yeah, it really was a lot like home and while she only had her mother left in Sydney to miss, she experienced an unexpected pang of homesickness. With the chaos of LA behind her, and Nik safely on his way to Detroit, she was assured some peace. Of course, the media had snagged onto the events at Tantaliser’s last show like a fly on a hamburger. There was the earth shattering revelation Nik was indeed writing again. His comments about the mysterious woman spun the endless tabloids into frenzied attempts to find out who she was. There were of course the usual suspects, the serial rock star daters who’d gone on record to approve of Nik and his sexy bad boy behaviour. Then there was a plethora of wannabe movie stars clamouring for their five seconds of fame. No. No fifteen minutes of fame locked up in this one, girls. Just a mere few seconds before a new celebrity clambered her way right over the top of you to be linked with Nik. She could laugh at them, but she didn’t. Because the truth was that she had acted every bit as childish the night of the concert. The thought of being locked with him in that closet, of deliberately putting herself in such an exposed position, sent a shudder through her. Thankfully, her name hadn’t made it to the press. Though she didn’t know how. At the very least security knew she’d been there. But the rumour mill worked overtime to find out just which red headed woman had been with Nik. Dozens of names graced the front pages of celebrity tabloids over the week. Every single one of those women had been questioned and paid handsomely for their time. Two women denied it, three were out of town, another three hinted that it could have been them and the rest, well, they claimed Nik as their own in a heartbeat. It surely made for entertaining reading on the airplane. As for Nik’s new song, “Baby I’m Yours”, every radio station in the country reported hundreds of requests for the unreleased song. A scratchy version of it, recorded live at the concert, had made its way illegally onto the Internet, and a million or so copies had been downloaded. Yes, the black market was still going strong, thanks to cell phone technology. Nik’s management worked feverishly to get the song some airplay with a much better quality rendition, but their trip to Detroit delayed the production by a few more days. Already music stores were ordering the single by the boatload. Apparently, Nik’s star had taken a turn for the better. Damn him. Still, she smiled at his good fortune, preferring to level the playing field by pulling a similar stunt in New York in two week’s time. The band loved the idea, and Rachel saw no harm. After all, with three weeks separating the events, the chances of a link were minimal. She knew Rachel’s team would intervene, spin the stunt in a favourable light
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser and give Mystique the advantage. And she sure as hell wasn’t planning on dedicating the song to some mysterious man. “So what are your plans, ladies?” Mac Johnson, the radio DJ who set up this leisurely cruise in return for an exclusive with lead singer, Anna, appeared from inside the yacht. “World domination?” He was an odd looking man. His voice had left Charlie with the impression he’d be big and robust, with a Santa Claus kind of belly and a jolly giant grin. But the truth was, he was five foot zero and weighed less than a feather. The short, balding man in his fifties wasn’t someone to be messed with, however. According to Rachel, he held San Francisco in the palm of his hand with his top-forty afternoon drive show and talk back show. The show Anna would be on in the morning. Poor girl had to get up at three in the morning. Charlie suppressed a smile at not being the centre of attention. “Well, Mac,” Deirdre, their lead guitarist, who much preferred to be called Dede, draped an arm around the DJ. Where Anna stood tall and slim and elegant and graceful, Dede was the complete opposite. She was a squat, square woman, athletic and fast, who wore her hair like a big chocolate fuzz ball. The woman even had a framed article about her scary hairy afro hanging in her hotel room. She just loved controversy and fished for it whenever she could, like dumping Rachel in hot water over her night after the concert. After her adventure with Nik, Charlie had jumped straight into a cold shower when she returned to the hotel. Five entire minutes she spent numbing her body with the shower jets at full power, having pulled the phone from the wall to stop any unnecessary, but very wanted, sweaty phone sex. Straight after, she ran straight to Rachel’s room for some gal pal advice. Only sweet, innocent Rachel wasn’t there. The woman, of course, was in Casey’s bed and when she tried to sneak back in to the hotel later that morning, Charlie waited with a litany of questions. The most important one being whether it was worth it. “You see, it goes a little like this.” Dede began. Charlie groaned internally, recognising the woman’s penchant for melodrama. She debated whether to gag the pocket rocket before she blabbed too much. One glance at Rachel, and Charlie knew they were thinking alike. “We got Anna here, the angelic voice of our band. She’s the face of Mystique you see, and what a beautiful face it is too.” Mac chuckled, nodding at Anna. “She’s right.” Anna only rolled her eyes and turned to admire the view. Somehow, five foot nothing Mac Johnson wasn’t as interesting as the expanse of the Golden Gate Bridge towering above them. Anna was suffering a mild identity crisis. Tired of being the delicate one
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser and confiding in Charlie recently that she wanted to break out of her angelic persona and throw on some grunge clothing, stomp around in black leather boots and streak her hair pink. “And then you’ve got Tory, the pierced queen of the keyboard world. This girl can do wonders with a keyboard.” “Or a piano,” Tory smiled. The metallic clang of her collective piercings was as familiar to Charlie as socks and underwear. A friend since grade school, Tory was another mechanic. They’d even gone to the same trade school together, showing the boys how to pull apart an engine block and put it all back together again in an afternoon. Tory glanced at Charlie and winked. “And then you’ve got our Nana over there.” Dede pointed over at Nancy. The oldest of the group, Nancy was a little old-fashioned and rather a little too prim for this lifestyle. But true to her grit, she got by, carving out her niche in this collection of truly mismatched women. “Now, don’t go telling Nancy that she should lose her cool once in a while, or she might just thumb her nose at you. But she is a true wiz with that violin and a guitar. No second fiddle for her, no siree.” Nancy rolled her eyes. Charlie wondered how many times they’d all hear Dede give away their story like this. Of course, when the powerhouse eyed Charlie, a cold hand settled on Charlie’s shoulder. Dread sliced through her at the sordid details Dede could spew about Charlie’s latest adventures. “And last, but by no means least, you’ve got our kick-ass drummer and founder of Mystique, Charlie Brown. No one, and I mean no one, plays the drums like our Charlie.” Poking her tongue out at Dede, Charlie broke into a relieved laugh. Thank heaven she didn’t know anything to go spilling about Nik. On the other side of the yacht, Dede winked mischievously and opened her mouth as if to say more, but then she snapped it shut and laughed. Mac Johnson, however, saw the little play between them. His eyes instantly zeroed in on Charlie, giving her reason to squirm uncomfortably. Small, beady eyes way too close together pinned her to the spot. Something in his expression warned her he had an ace up his sleeve and she needed to be alert. He broke free from Dede’s iron-like grip and strode over to Charlie, extending a hand in greeting. “So you’re the Charlie Brown I’ve been hearing so much about?” He shook her hand firmly but held on, keeping her eyes nailed to his. “I want you on my show.” What was it with men wanting her lately? First Nik, now this man. The leer in his eyes, the sweaty palm glued solidly to hers, and the devilish twinkle assured her he had something shady going on in his balding head.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Without warning, her hand started to shake. Backing away wasn’t an option, not unless she wanted to swim back to shore, so she took the only option left. Stretching up to her full five foot nine height, Charlie stepped forward and into his space. Mac Johnson didn’t know where to look. But Charlie did. Over the top of his head, she locked gazes with Rachel for some much needed guidance. The admonishment told her she was treading thin ice with her overbearing behaviour. As for the show? Rachel shook her head only once. A subtle but unmissable response. To Charlie’s horror, Nik’s words filtered back into her head. Do you always listen when people say you shouldn’t? She tried to shake off his dare, really she did, but when she opened her mouth to speak, she couldn’t stop herself. “I’d love to. If it’s okay with Anna that I share the spotlight?” She eyed Anna for approval. Lord but Anna was the only one who could stop her now. Anna smiled. “I’d love to have you there, you know that. After all, your brilliance with the drums is what brought us together.” Damn. Still, Charlie smiled back at Mac Johnson when he fixed her with those beady eyes again. Yeah, she’d grace the halls of his talk back show and if he so much as dared ask her anything untoward—or, God forbid, about Nicholas St. Eve—she’d give him a piece of her mind. A smart move would be to bring Rachel along with her, just so she didn’t shove both of her size nine feet in her mouth, but a glance at Rach dusted the thought. Invisible daggers flew across the yacht, lodging squarely in Charlie’s chest. Rach was not happy and Charlie knew that by night’s end, she’d hear her full name being spoken again in those unmistakable, take-no-shit tones. ~ If he were a dog, his owner would castrate him and lock him up. At least, Nik thought so. Pining over some hottie left him feverishly writing new songs. Since flying into Detroit, he’d penned three songs and had drowned his good-for-nothing ass in at least a dozen cold showers. Every bone in his body—even the not-so-bony bone—urged him to call her. But he resisted. Well, in as much as glancing angrily at the phone every few minutes and silently willing it to ring. But he knew she wouldn’t call. Not after the brouhaha he caused by setting fire to the newspaper. Either he was too bad of a bad boy for her, or she was keeping the distance because she didn’t trust herself around him. He liked that idea, and after he strapped on his guitar for his first show in Detroit, he pumped his fist in the air.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Skeet only shook his head, while Brooksy, the new drummer, threw him a curious stare. The guy was raw, young and green as a branch, but he played alright. Not half as good as Charlie but Nik wasn’t dwelling on it. He’d stupidly let her go, thinking with his not-sobony bone rather than his brain. As for Casey, well he was in a world of hurt all his own. He wasn’t paying too much attention to Nik after spending another night with Rachel. He’d confessed, in the privacy of Nik’s hotel room that he couldn’t keep up with this onagain off-again ritual. Casey was a stable guy. Came from a home with two loving parents and four adorable sisters. He wanted that with Rachel but she was honour-bound to Mystique. Everybody understood. Just as everybody understood that Rachel and Charlie were as close as two unrelated women could be, in a completely non-sexual way. Ah, sexual. The word played on Nik’s mind as the warm-up band scampered off stage. It played havoc with his groin too. Damn him for playing the nice guy. He knew nice guys always came last—or not at all. He’d had her. Could have convinced her to spend the night with him. Would have except for the look in her eye that said complicated was an understatement. He knew complicated. They were best of pals. Ever since he’d lost his wife, Penny, during childbirth. Ever since he’d drowned his sorrows in the first bottle of grog. And ever bloody since Bobby gave it up for another line of white powder. Shit. What was he thinking? He was about to go on stage and drop another new song bombshell on the unsuspecting audience and here he was, dredging up memories of a past he’d dealt with long ago. Well, at least with Penny. As for Bobby, Nik shook his head and followed the others out onto the brightly lit stage. The audience cheered and hollered and gave him a reason to ignore the sombre thoughts in his head. Instead, he had thought back to the phone sex he’d shared with Charlie and the sounds of pure pleasure that rippled through her. Feeling better, he grinned. Jumping in front of the mic, he clapped his applause of the turn out. For whatever reason, America had embraced him this time around. He wanted to think it was because of his music. And it was. Sort of. For the real star here wasn’t so much his music, as it was Charlie and the inspiration she provided. Striking his guitar, he decided he would have her, consequences be damned. “Hello, Detroit!” he shouted, only to hear ‘Hello, Nik’ come back to him. His grin spread wider, if that was even possible. He turned and gestured toward his band. “Have we got a show for you tonight. You’re going to love it. Sit back and enjoy.” And with that, he broke into his first song for the night. A brand new number inspired by the clandestine meeting in the closet.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Red blooded woman Makes me weak at the knees Knows how to make a man beg Knows how to make him say please I’ve got her on my mind Twenty four seven Her touch stops my heart Just a kiss and baby I’m in heaven Fire Baby I’m on fire Every time you look at me Takes me just a little bit higher Love doesn’t often come twice But I’m dumb struck by the way I feel Sweet sweet girl I never believed you could steal My heart, my soul Everything you can own But please don’t leave me I’m nothing when I’m alone Finishing the song almost brought the house down as screaming teenage girls surged forward. Nik grinned, letting the applause drum through him and squelch his need for sexual release. At least for now. That could come later. Instead, he watched a young girl, probably no more than seventeen or eighteen, raise her T-shirt and bare her breasts for him. Once upon a time, he would have grinned and enjoyed the view. But not anymore. The appeal was gone, and Nik felt strangely proud he’d outgrown his rotten behaviour. He was bad, but maybe not that bad these days. Not with Charlie still out there. Not while he hadn’t had her yet. And certainly not when he was prone to playing the gentleman of late. He wanted to shout at the wild teenage girl and tell her to cover up, but he knew it would only embarrass her. Instead, he turned to Casey, who shrugged and grinned as if to say, what do you want me to do about it? Rather than carry on, they plunged straight into a bunch of familiar, popular songs. Songs that had served the band well and deserved to be played again. Adrenaline roared through him, welcome and deserved, putting thoughts of a certain frustrating woman out of his mind.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser ~ In his hotel room, Nik waited for the cold shower to kill off the interminable erection. Not so long ago, he couldn’t get one. Now it seemed to be a permanent attachment. Thank you very much, Charlie. It was really late. Or early, depending which way you looked at it. Either way the sun slowly rose above the horizon and early morning rays streaked through his hotel room, reminding him he’d survived another night without her. This counting down could very well drive him nuts. It had crossed his mind to find some release with another, faceless woman. But he couldn’t do it. It wasn’t like they were going steady. Hell, she’d told him not to call her. Told him not to see her. And yet he couldn’t justify being with another woman. Not until this issue was resolved. Oh, she could posture all she liked about it being complicated, but her blatant attraction to him meant the case was still open. He hoped to get the bottom of her idea of ‘complicated.’ Certain he could settle her reservations with a brief walk down memory lane with Nik St. Eve, he was about to shut off the water when Casey pounded on his door. “What is it?” Nik grumbled over the rushing water. Within minutes Casey poked his head through the bathroom door. “Radio, man. Turn on the radio.” Casey did the honours while Nik towelled off. He stopped moving when he heard her voice. Answering some jackass question from some backward DJ. Sharing a glance with Casey, Nik secured the towel around his hips and moved to turn the volume up. “Why did I start the band?” She repeated the question. Did she somehow sense he was now listening? “Well, I auditioned for another band but didn’t make it because I’m a woman and they wanted a man.” Nik nodded and then caught himself. “And what band was that?” She laughed softly. “Oh, I don’t divulge secrets, Mr. Johnson. I’m not a gossipmonger. I’m a doer. Play my drums. Write my music. That’s what I do.” The DJ chuckled. “And what about men? Do you do them? Or do you do women?” Nik flew at the radio before pulling up short. Well hell, he thought with a wave of chagrin, he’d flung the same gossip around about her not so long ago. His cheeks
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser burned and the reflection in the mirror told him what he already knew. Red as a bloody tomato. Charlie only laughed. “Honey, that’s none of your business.” Honey? Right, so now she was using his mannerisms, was she? Well, he would call her on it before she knew what hit her. Picking up the phone, he dialled the hotel’s reception desk and insisted they put him through to the radio station. San Francisco. What he wouldn’t give to be there right now, waiting for her at the end of the interview. He’d show that damned DJ he knew exactly what kind of sexual partner she enjoyed. “I see. So the name Nicholas St. Eve doesn’t ring a bell, then?” There was a brief silence before she finally answered. “You mean the lead singer of Tantaliser? Yes, I know Nik. He’s a very talented man.” Damn but she was good, he thought as he listened to the ringing on the other end of the phone. “And there’s nothing going on between you?” She laughed but he heard the unnatural quality of it and knew she was stalling for time. More than ever, he willed someone to answer his call. He needed to get in there, create a diversion and let her off the hook. Nik blinked. What the hell? Was he being protective of her? Even when she’d pushed him away? Two seconds was all he needed to defiantly declare ‘hell yeah’. He sure as goat’s cheese was protecting her. He may want to lock her in his hotel room and tie her to his bed, but that was no one’s business. This shock jock wasn’t out to interview a talented musician. He wanted gossip, the best kind there was: straight from the horse’s mouth. Finally she quieted. “No, Nik and I are friends.” “So there’s no truth to the rumour that you were in that closet with him in LA?” Nik gulped. All that damned publicity and not one mention of her name. Until now. “Nah,” she claimed with an air of blasé he had to admire. “No truth to that. I don’t, and have never had, red hair.” The DJ chuckled. “So I’ve heard. But they do have wigs these days. That should hide your identity well enough.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “Well,” she sighed, sounding tired. He could almost visualise himself giving her a shoulder massage; her supple skin like butter in his hands as he worked through the tight knots she had to be feeling. “Believe what you like. Nik and I are just friends.” “Right.” The shock jock didn’t sound convinced. “So then he didn’t write a new song about you and perform it last night in Detroit?” She had to be ready to bust, Nik thought. Ready to rip this guy’s throat out and drop it on his chest. He almost wanted her to lose her cool. Then he’d know she was human. But, he already knew that. Her kiss proved it. Along with her touch. And the troubled look in her eyes. Besides, he was the bad boy rocker, not her. “Really, he released a new song?” She sounded pleased, leaving him feeling warm all over. “That’s great. What’s it called?” “Fire.” The DJ sounded a little bemused. Nik supposed the guy had thought she’d get angry. He thought she’d get angry with all these ridiculous questions. If it were him in that studio... “You haven’t heard it? It starts with Red blooded woman, makes me weak at the knees.” Well shit. When he heard the words said with such a leer to them, then yeah they sounded downright crude. But his fury dissipated when he heard Charlie’s voice again. “Wow. Sound’s like he’s really got something to say. Maybe he should just call her up and tell her.” Nik laughed. Just call her up? He stared down at the still-ringing phone and as he was about to give up, a woman’s voice relayed the name of the radio station. “How can I help you?” Nik chuckled before clearing his throat. He hoped the fake Texan accent would carry him through, but that it wasn’t enough to disguise his voice from Charlie. “Yeah, this is Billy Bob,” he drawled. “I’m such a fan of Mystique that I just have to tell them in person. That Anna is such a pretty girl. Can I speak with them?” The woman hesitated before putting him through. The silence was only short before he heard the DJ announce the caller. And then he was on. “Hey there, Billy Bob. What did you want to say to these fine young women?” Nik grinned at Casey, who only rolled his eyes. “Mac, I wanted to tell Anna that she is just the prettiest thing I have ever seen. And as for you, Charlie, you’re a hot babe too. I’m sure the dumb-ass band that turned you down is now spitting fire that they missed out on your talent.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser She laughed. “Well thank you, Billy Bob. I bet they are, too.” He couldn’t tell if she recognised his voice, but he hoped to God she did. Maybe then she’d see he’d be willing to defend her against the slimy likes of Mac Johnson. “Oh, and Mac?” The DJ chuckled, as if humouring this country bumpkin. “What is it Billy Bob?” “Don’t give Charlie a hard time about that boy Nik. A lady deserves much better than that.” ~ An hour later, as Nik lay flat on his back staring up at the plain white ceiling, he wondered if fate would help him find a way back to Charlie. No woman enticed him the way she did. Well, no, that was a lie. Penny had. Penny had been able to read him like an open book. And while he never expected to find another Penny, he did hope to find love again. He wasn’t about to live his life without trying. Beside him, the phone sprang to life. Scooping it up, Nik hit the talk button and put the thing to his ear. “What is it?” There was a brief pause before he heard, “Well, hey there, Billy Bob.” Chapter 4 Nik sat bolt upright, his body on high alert. “Charlie,” he breathed, hoping he didn’t sound like an idiot. She laughed. “What are you doing?” He rested back on the bed again, trying to relax. The memory of their last phone conversation assaulted his senses. So much for relaxing. “In bed. Couldn’t sleep.” “Just finished a gig, I hear?” He laughed. “Yeah, babe.” “And what about your new song? Did the audience love it?”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser He nodded, wishing she were right here beside him. “Oh yeah.” He heard her sigh. “Where are you?” She chuckled. “In bed. Really tired.” “Are you okay?” He heard the concern in his voice and wondered why she would be in bed. She hummed softly. God he loved her voice. “It’s just a headache. I meant what I said.” “What’s that?” “About you being talented. You really are, Nik. Now you’re writing again, I can see that. I’m sorry I ever doubted it.” He felt his heart go all mushy at her words. “Thanks, babe.” Silence settled between them, comfortable, soft, like a worn-in pair of jeans. Shuffling sounds gave his imagination a nudge; coming up with endless possibilities of what she could be doing, what she might be wearing. Whatever clothing covered her body, he itched to peel it away and expose her for his eyes only. “So you just happened to be listening to that particular radio station, huh?” He chuckled. “Nah, Casey alerted me. I was in the shower.” “Cold one?” His eyes widened. Did she want him to be thinking about her? To be hot for her? Lord knew he was, but after her determined push and firm declaration, he didn’t know what she wanted. The only thing he could be certain of was the fire in his belly that roared to life any time she was near. It stung to think she wouldn’t need a cold shower over him, but he would never stop trying to convince her that one night alone with him would be worth it. He groaned. “You know it.” She laughed. Was that a nervous laugh he detected? “Glad I’m not the only one, babe.” Warm liquid spread through his body, awakening every inch of skin and muscle. He’d been right. She did want him. Knowing it and getting her to act on it, however, were totally different stories. Getting her alone was nearly impossible, and that was when they were in the same city. Now, they were thousands of miles apart and he was afraid that after tasting her in the flesh, phone sex wasn’t going to be enough. “See,” he swallowed. “You still want me.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “Yes,” her voice dropped to a husky whisper. “I’m not denying that.” “So what are we going to do about it?” he pushed, knowing she could hang up on him at any second. The exit was right there for her. He shook with excitement when she didn’t take it. “Nothing,” she insisted. “I don’t do one night stands, Nik.” He growled. “You would have to be the most frustrating woman I’ve ever met, Charlie Brown.” “So why don’t you just leave me alone?” He heard her voice harden. Not much, but enough for him to back off. Something here didn’t fit quite right. She said she didn’t want long-term love - most unusual for a woman. And she didn’t do one-night stands. There had to be some kind of middle ground, but what was she willing to try? It left Nik with the sensation that her vulnerability ran very, very deep. Usually, he ran away from such a troubled woman, as far and as fast as was humanly possible. He caused trouble, he didn’t fix it. But he wasn’t running away from her. Hell no. Not this time. Rather, he deliberately took huge strides in the direction of the trouble, eager to eat up the distance she wanted to force between them. He wasn’t acting like the bad boy he liked to think he was and for once, it didn’t bother him at all. Either Bobby’s death had reminded him of how fragile and lonely life could be. Or the doctor’s deadly warning about his boozing had gone a long way to sucking him into adulthood. Whatever the reason, he wasn’t giving up on Charlie without a fight. “Because I like you, love. And I like mysteries. I want to know why it’s not so easy for you.” “Why?” she demanded. “Do you think you can make it better?” Upon hearing the sarcasm in her voice, Nik dragged a hand over his face. “Are you trying to push me away?” Silence. “It doesn’t matter,” he declared stubbornly. “I’m not going anywhere.” She sighed and then growled. He heard more rustling and then the thump-thump of her pacing the floor. Or at least, that’s what he thought she was doing.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “Why didn’t you tell that DJ what he could do with his questions?” More silence. “You wanted to. Right? Hell, I wasn’t even going to fake the accent, just tell him exactly who I am and why the hell he should shut his trap.” “You would do that?” “For you, love.” He heard her suck in a breath. Hoping like crazy she was impressed, he waited for an answer, a response of some kind. Finally she spoke, but it wasn’t the response he expected. “You could have really thrown a spanner in the works, Nik. Ruined both our reputations. Not to mention our bands.” “And here I was thinking I’d done a noble deed,” he sneered. “You really are a piece of work.” To his surprise, she laughed. “Someone described you that way to me once.” The corner of his mouth twitched, wanting to smile. “Charlie?” “Yes?” “Don’t change the subject.” “Don’t tell me what to do,” she hissed, the fire in her voice ten times hotter than the fire that sparked between them. He contemplated apologising and then decided he didn’t have anything to apologise for. Not yet. “Maybe we should hang up now,” he suggested. “Before one of us says something he or she will later regret.” “Fine.” He opened his mouth to speak but she’d already done it. Hung up on him. Again. ~ Charlie paced. Honestly, if she were a cartoon character, there’d be steam billowing out of her ears right about now. Who the hell did he think he was? Telling her what to do. Well, not a chance. She would not fall into that trap ever again.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Throwing a pillow across the room, she dropped down on the bed to steam some more. He thought he knew her so well. Thought he could read her every thought, deduct the reasons for every one of her moves. Lord but he could be such a pain in the ass. His oversized male ego jumped at the chance to play the hero, the saviour to her little girl lost. No way buddy, she thought, shaking her head and baring her teeth. Restless energy zoomed through her body, bringing her to her feet to resume the useless pacing. Right now, she wanted sex. Hot, sweaty, lose your mind kind of sex. She needed to work off the tension rolling through her; tension Nik had created by being all macho and brutish. It didn’t matter what he thought he knew. He hadn’t been there in person, cowering under Roger’s iron fist and hiding from his explosive temper. He hadn’t lived through two years of pure hell with a man who watched, calculated, and dictated her every move. She had. And she wasn’t going back. Time had returned her strength and she wasn’t shy in standing up for herself anymore. Once upon a time, she had given up her independence, her voice. She’d willingly bowed down to a man she thought worthy and he’d abused the power mercilessly. Damn it, she wasn’t going back to that kind of hell. Ever. And if it meant sacrificing the likes of Nicholas St. Eve to maintain her freedom, then it was a price she would pay. Deciding she’d had enough mushy conversations for one morning, Charlie scooped up her purse and room key and headed for the door. Halfway there, the phone rang. She screeched to a halt. Pausing, she glanced back and wondered if it was Nik. A twinge of guilt ran through her that she’d hung up on him a second time, but by the same token, she wasn’t going to let him dictate to her. With a shrug of one shoulder, she continued to the door. Charlie opened it, stepping through, and shutting it behind her without a second thought. The corridor felt empty as she power-walked to the elevator. Like magic, the doors whooshed open when she neared, causing her to smile. Score one for Charlie. Sunshine greeted her in the lobby, a welcome relief to the bitter memories dredged up. Even more welcoming was the rest of the band sitting and drinking coffee. Anna spotted her first, but it was Rachel who stood to greet her with one of those life saving bear hugs. “Are you okay?” She wished people would stop asking her that. “Yes.” “Headache?” Charlie grimaced. “Sadly, I’ve still got it.” A frown creased Rachel’s normally serene features. “I think you should get that checked out, honey.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “Nah,” Charlie shook her head lightly and then smiled. “It’s just the late nights and early mornings. After a good night’s sleep, I’ll be right as rain.” Rachel didn’t look convinced at all. Thankfully, she didn’t pursue the topic as she prepared to lead the group on a tour of the venue for their two shows instead. The group rose as one, all heading toward the exit of the hotel, when the concierge ran across the lobby in their direction. Charlie groaned at the sound of her name and watched as the young man waved a small piece of paper in the air while he ran toward her. She could already guess what was on the slip of paper. Some message from Nik chastising her for her childish behaviour. Or some smart ass remark about her inability to communicate with him. Well, she’d communicate all right. She’d tear that little piece of paper into a million tiny pieces and throw them in the bin. “Oh Miss Brown,” the man puffed when he finally caught up. “I’m glad I caught you. This message just came through for you. He said it was urgent.” Urgent my ass, she thought. He held out the slip of paper for her. Charlie forced a smile and gritted her teeth through a most impolite thank you. The poor young man didn’t know which way to turn. He glanced over her shoulder, to a group of women and friends she knew would be eyeing her as if she were a crazy woman. It really wasn’t his fault Nik grated on her nerves. And she shouldn’t be taking it out on him. “I’m sorry,” she offered softly. “I have a headache.” Way to go, Cat, she thought begrudgingly, blame it on a headache. Still, he accepted her apology and left her with the note. Peering down into her hands, she saw only three words written on it. As she read them, her throat constricted and her eyes burned. Damn him. I’m sorry, babe. Couldn’t he just leave her to wallow in her anger? Even if it was ill-directed and over the top, couldn’t he let her have that? No, he had to do the sensitive thing and apologise. He said he was sorry. The men she’d known never used that word and if they did, they didn’t mean it. It was a hollow word to Charlie, perhaps the most useless word in the English language. Saying sorry and being sorry weren’t always unanimous. The only kind of sorry she understood was one filled with actions. Not of the flower-variety either. Still, he had apologised. He’d called back when he could have dropped her and her issues like a hot bloody potato. Damn him, she breathed, sure fire would erupt from her nostrils at any given moment. She didn’t need this right now, not when she should be
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser focusing on her music. Not when these headaches seemed to be a permanent fixture in her all too noisy head these days. A gentle hand on her shoulder pulled her out of her thoughts. Turning, she found Rachel trying to steal a glance at the note. When their gazes met, Charlie couldn’t help but wonder how much Rachel knew. After all, information obviously flowed from Casey to Rachel, but would it stretch enough to include Nik’s personal life, his thoughts, his desires? Although she hoped it didn’t, she was ready to talk to Rach now. She needed the guidance her friend could provide, a woman who seemed both more naïve and experienced than Charlie about these things. “We’ll talk,” Charlie whispered so the others wouldn’t hear. “Later.” Nodding, Rachel tugged her sleeve. “Come on honey, some fresh air will do you the world of good, I think.” Linking her arm with Rachel’s, the way they’d done when they were kids, Charlie followed the others out into the beautiful sunny day. With their plans to tour the venue followed by lunch and then preparations for the shows, Charlie hoped for some respite from thoughts of Nik. Even if was only a brief reprieve, she’d be grateful. He’d turned her world around enough for one day, first with his phone call to the radio station, and then with his persistence that she wanted to be with him. And then, finally, there was the phone message. I’m sorry, babe. How did she ignore that? She wondered dumbly as she trundled alongside Rachel. The sun-drenched street alive with colour and noise, reminded her why she enjoyed this life. As a mechanic, she would never have had the opportunity to flit around the world. Already she’d seen most of Australia and Britain as their promotional gigs rolled on. Now she was in America, land of the free, and although each stop was only a short one, she found more and more reasons to keep the band going. Nik was nothing more than a dalliance. Nothing he could do or say would change her opinion of men. Could it? While the dominant, independent part of her brain screamed it couldn’t, she couldn’t ignore the small voice wishing and hoping it would. The little girl, trapped by the memories of a loving mother and a father who would bounce her on his knee or carry her on his shoulders, wanted so desperately to believe that someway, somehow love existed. Damn him, she scowled silently, hidden behind a face bearing a smile and calm expression. Damn, damn, damn! He couldn’t, it wasn’t possible. Was it? When the group turned into an old building, Charlie tried to push Nik out of her thoughts. Tried and failed. Stubborn as he was, he refused to budge. She reminded herself he wanted a no-strings-attached, one-night stand.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser All it would show her was his obsession with the physical attraction between them. As magnetic as it was, it consisted of nothing deeper. A powerful pull dared her to give in and prove her thoughts on love right. That it didn’t exist, at least, not for her. That it couldn’t be as grand as everyone seemed to think. That Rachel and Casey were a rare exception to the rule. The darkness of the cavern-like concert hall allowed her to drop her guard. She felt her smile disappear and the calm expression give way for one of intensity and confusion. While the others surged forward toward the stage, Charlie held back. This was normally an enchanting, exciting experience. Discovering the new venue, the ins and outs of its backstage passageways, the dormant thrill of the show just waiting to roar back into life and ignite them all. Damn it, why was she letting Nik ruin it for her? But as quickly as the curse came, another thought replaced it and she smiled. Was it the same for him as for her? Did he stand in awe and wonder, and try to imagine the concert in full force from here in the back row? Even now, after so long in the business, did he continue to feel the rush that came with playing a venue for the first time? Or was he so jaded, he didn’t care anymore? Suddenly it was all she could do not to call him. Damn his bossy-boots attitude, she was strong enough to handle him. But before she could move an inch, Rachel stepped in her way. Charlie couldn’t ignore the warm blue eyes trying desperately to get a peek into her soul. Without thinking, Charlie pulled Rachel into an embrace that shattered her resolve to talk later. “What do I do?” she whispered in Rach’s ear. “About Nik?” Rachel chuffed softly. “Why are you fighting it?” Charlie jerked back. Definitely not the response she was expecting. “Are you saying I should?” Rachel smiled and touched Charlie’s cheek. “Not right this instant, my friend, but when the time is right.” Charlie frowned. More confused than ever, she closed her eyes and shook her head. “If it was too easy,” Rachel continued, “you would walk away. You like a challenge, Cat, and we both know it.” Opening one eye, she squinted at Rach. “No happily ever after? Just straight sex?” Rachel shrugged and then grinned wickedly. “We all have urges.” Throwing Charlie’s words back at her snagged a wry smile from Charlie. They both chuckled. “Don’t overthink this. It’s obvious you’re both attracted to each other. Why not just enjoy that?”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “Because,” Charlie dropped her eyes to the floor and kicked at a ball of dust. “He’s not Roger.” As if reading her mind, Rachel spoke, the tone of her voice urgent and insistent. “If Casey say’s he’s okay, then he is. I admit, he’s not exactly conventional, but,” Rachel shook her shoulder, forcing her head up. “He’s not Roger. I promise.” Undeniable relief flooded through Charlie, weakening her at the knees and forcing her into one of the nearby seats. Knowing intellectually Nik was different from Roger didn’t mean she accepted it emotionally. And after her past experiences, acceptance didn’t come easily. Nik would have to prove he wouldn’t turn into a monster, but then, would he even bother? If she scrounged up enough courage to bare herself to him, would he decide it was all too much and walk away for good? “What are you thinking?” Rachel asked, her voice taking on a wary note. It warned she thought whatever was going through Charlie’s head was too much. Rachel thought she was over-thinking things—as usual. Charlie shook her head. “I don’t know what to think, Rach.” Smiling, Rachel set a hand on her arm and rubbed gently. “Look, I wouldn’t be giving you a green light if I didn’t think it was okay, would I? If you were to consider this from an image point of view, then perhaps a hot and steamy affair with bad boy Nik St. Eve would do your image a world of good.” Charlie groaned. “Or a world of bad.” “Nah,” Rachel shook her head. “Think about it. All the publicity so far has pointed to the attraction you already feel. He’s said things, you’ve denied them, and you know what that does to the media,” she smiled knowingly. “The industry says the only bad publicity is none at all.” “But I actually like my reputation.” The fact even surprised Charlie. But it was true. The media portrayed her in a light she felt was right. The hardworking Aussie battler who’d made good despite the odds—who’d be unhappy with that? She didn’t want to be seen as a freeloader, or as yet another lovesick fool trailing after the big and famous Nik. It was obvious, at least to Charlie and maybe even to Rachel, what the attraction did to her. And that out-of-control feeling freaked Charlie out more than the possibility of him turning into another tyrant like her ex. “I know,” Rachel agreed. “I do too. I helped you create it remember? But in all honesty, I don’t think your fans would think badly of you if you got into something with Nik. And you know that if he hurt you, he’d have hoards of male fans breaking down his door to get at him. I bet even he feels that pressure.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser She hadn’t thought about it that way and she couldn’t help but wonder if Nik had. Was that why he’d gone to the effort to say he was sorry? So she couldn’t later accuse him of being a cold-hearted fish? Charlie sighed, completely unsure of how to view this any more. As difficult as it was to admit, she’d become cynical and distrusting as a result of her past experiences. She couldn’t deny it. And she couldn’t deny it influenced her behaviour around Nik. The trouble was, it was so at odds with her physical reaction to him it left her looking like a tease. Charlie was not a tease. “I don’t know,” Charlie sighed again. “I think I’m too old for this.” Rachel chuckled. “Oh honey, I think you just need to give yourself a chance. I know you think you made a bad judgment with Roger and, that now, you can’t trust that judgment. But honestly, I know you are capable of seeing straight. The very fact you haven’t hopped straight into bed with Nik says so.” Charlie grunted a laugh, thinking back to Nik’s body pressed up against hers in the closet and how close she’d come to following him back to his room. She still hadn’t told Rachel the details of the night back in LA, and for her own reasons, she wasn’t about to. The closeness of their bodies, the feel of him plastered against her stayed with her, left her wanting more. Even now. As much as she wanted to intellectualise and rationalise this thing between them, she knew the strength of their physical attraction prevented it. There was no rational thought or action around Nik. He simply inspired outrageousness, whether it be of a physical or verbal nature, and she instinctively knew it would be fiery between them. “Okay,” Rachel slapped her thigh. “Enough talk about spunky Nik. We need to focus on the next two nights. You have two shows to perform before we head to Las Vegas. Are you up to it?” Charlie smiled. Finally, some relief from her headache. She stood and clapped her hands together. “You betcha, baby.” ~ Nik stared at the ceiling, trying to weigh up the pros and cons of flying out to San Francisco. He could be there in a matter of hours, face to face with her. She wouldn’t be able to hide from him by hanging up. He wanted answers, but he stopped short of forcing them out of her. Her comment about not telling her what to do left him clear on that point. Whatever had happened to her left her fiercely independent and it infuriated the hell out of him. All he did was tell her not to change the topic. But then, she was a woman and it a woman’s prerogative to do whatever she liked, wasn’t it?
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Lord help him, he prayed silently, absently plucking a string on his guitar. Something drove him toward this woman when it should have wedged a two-foot thick wall between them. She tried to do that herself, telling him to leave her alone, but he didn’t think she really wanted him to go. Or she wouldn’t have called him. Besides, her body language told him they were in agreement, even that very brief, unguarded look of smouldering desire in her eyes. But Nik knew enough about women to know there was always some sort of expectation they had of a man. Whatever it was, he was sure he wouldn’t live up to it. His expected failure would drive her away, elicit some sort of “I told you so” from those divine lips before she left for good. Although he was hopeful enough to believe there was love still out there for him, he wasn’t foolish enough to risk a broken heart trying to find it. No. He wouldn’t be driving out to the airport tonight. There was no danger of him flying down to San Francisco any time soon. She’d hung up on him, and if she wanted something from him, then she could come to him this time. “Nik!” Casey shouted at him. Blinking, Nik found his exasperated band members staring at him. “Sorry,” he grumbled. “Where the hell are you, man?” “Right here,” he insisted, though knew he was only present in body. His mind still swirled around Charlie and her wishy-washy ways that were driving him insane. He’d apologised and she’d stayed silent. Wisdom should have told him any chance of them becoming an item had been flushed down the toilet. Rather, it only fortified her claim that things were complicated and strengthened his need to find out why. “No, you’re not,” Skeet whined. “You’re off with the fairies. Get your act together man. We got a show to do.” Hearing young Skeet give him a razz made him smile. The kid was right. They had a show to do, several in fact, and if he was going to pull off the new-song-every-show routine, he had to haul ass real fast. Nodding, Nik let his lips pull into a grin at the fresh material he’d written after getting so damn close to her. If he tried hard enough, he could probably remember exactly how she tasted, her sweet scent, what she felt like up against him. Yeah, now those were the kinds of memories he wanted to make with her. “All right then.” Nik kicked a foot in the air, pumping the blood a little faster around his body. Rehearsals could be a drag, but not when a new song was on the cards, especially one written for someone like Charlie. He’d been lucky with the DJ giving her a taste of his latest release and he was searching for some way of getting this one to her
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser as well. Hell, if she wasn’t going to listen to him on the phone and he couldn’t get to her in person, he’d serenade her with the lyrics generated by the passionate memories they both shared. Nik waited for Bobby’s replacement—the poor guy still hadn’t lost the unfortunate title—to count them in. Brooksy clacked his sticks together and as Nik watched, a vision of Charlie dressed in skin tight red leather superimposed itself over the non-descript man. The vision brought heat to Nik’s groin as they broke into the melody of the new song, “All Night Long”. A body on fire Dangerous curves Oh baby take me higher Your skin so perfectly sweet I think I’m in heaven Sweltering in your heat When you touched me It felt like I would burn Don’t wanna live without your touch Feel your hands on my skin Your eyes deep in mine I wanna make love to you All night long Longest legs I’ve ever seen Such a delicious paradise Baby I’m so keen I’ve got you under my skin And I’m never letting you go I don’t regret letting you in Okay, so some of the lyrics needed reworking, but the sound of the bass coupled with the absolute desire in Nik’s voice were good enough. At least the guys thought so, for when they quieted, four grinning faces and eight glazed eyes greeted him. The look in Casey’s eyes said it all though—that he’d gone mushy over a woman. Damn if it didn’t feel good.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Chapter 5 In Las Vegas, things got a little spicy. When Charlie arrived at the hotel on Monday morning, she received an urgent communication from Detroit via registered mail. She only knew one person in Detroit: Nik. The others looked at her curiously, as if she were betraying them in some way and she couldn’t help but feel a little guilty. Keeping this hidden from them had been nightmarish, and well, there really wasn’t much to tell except she had the hots for the guy. Still, he was in a rival band, competing for exactly the same audience, and to Dede, Anna, Nancy and Tory that meant he was off limits. She didn’t want to deal with this now, not when all she wanted to do was hide herself away in a dark room and ride out this latest headache. It came on after their midday gig the day before, right about the same time thoughts of Nik hit her square in the chest. Remembering their brief encounter in the closet only worsened the headache, leaving Charlie squinting at the bright morning light. “Get some rest, ladies,” Rachel intervened, ushering the others toward the elevators and leaving Charlie on her own at the front desk. Almost as if sensing the moment, the woman behind the desk motioned to Charlie. “You look weary,” she smiled sympathetically. “Would you like me to call a doctor to your room?” As she was about to shake her head no, Rachel sidled up beside her and nodded an emphatic yes. Neither woman needed to say a word as Charlie accepted Rachel’s concern. She could be pushy but if she wasn’t, Charlie wouldn’t be as successful as she was today. Rachel took Charlie’s luggage and her room key, saying she’d make sure the room was appropriate. Told Charlie to make her way up after a few minutes alone. And just like that, Charlie found herself standing at the desk on her own. The desk clerk smiled again. “She cares.” “Yes,” Charlie nodded, realising she still held the letter in her hand. “Is there somewhere outside where I could get some fresh air?” Pointing and nodding, the woman seemed almost to want to say more. Charlie hesitated, giving her a chance to speak but then gave up when the woman turned and resumed her paper shuffling. With a shrug, Charlie walked through the hotel lobby’s rear doors and found herself in a potted garden, surrounded by the scent of jasmine. The calming environment soothed her and, finding a nearby bench, she sat and brought the letter up to eye level.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser It had to be from Nik. Who else knew where she’d be this week? And he was still in Detroit. Which made opening the letter a scary prospect. Lord only knew what he’d sent her. He had no reason to contact her. Not having replied to his sorry message, she thought he’d let her go. But again she was wrong about him. Charlie wondered what else she’d been wrong about when it came to Nicholas St. Eve. Swallowing the nervous lump in her throat, she grabbed the zip-tab and sliced the envelope open. A single piece of paper poked out and when she tugged it out a little more, Charlie saw words. Correction—they were lyrics to a new song he’d written. For her. About her. Seeing the sheet music to “All Night Long” left her throat dry and her heart racing. Peeling her tongue away from the roof of her mouth, she let her eyes skim over the meaning while the notes on the page translated into music in her head. Heat roared through her sex-deprived body, settling in the pit of her belly and serving as a painful reminder of the night in LA. She closed her eyes, his words transporting her to a semi-dark room, touching, needing, tasting, wanting. His words drifted through her head, I wanna make love to you, all night long. Just the thought of it sent a shiver of need down her spine. As it reverberated in her womb, her cell phone vibrated in her pocket. With a startled jump, she was yanked out of her fantasy and back into reality. Fumbling for the phone, she frantically tried to control her breathing, not wanting to sound breathless. She checked the caller ID, but didn’t recognise the number. At least it wasn’t her mother. Phew. Answering the phone sounding as if she’d just spent a few rounds on a squash court would have taken some explaining. Accepting the call, she brought the phone to her ear. “Did you get my letter?” “Nik,” his name escaped her lips as a breathless sigh and for once, she didn’t care how it sounded. All the same, she was glad she was alone. He chuckled. “I take it you approve, then?” Opening and closing her mouth like a fish gasping for water, it stunned Charlie to think she was speechless. On the other end of the line, Nik chuckled, satisfied and cheeky. “That’s good. At least we agree on something.” Charlie gulped. Had he really just said that? Much to her surprise, she said, “Hell yes.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Silence greeted her and she felt a small wave of panic pass through her. Had she given in too easily? For months he’d chased her to no avail. Would he lose interest now that she’d yielded? “Nik?” A brief moment passed before he said, “I’m here, baby.” His voice was thick and low, almost a rumble that she could have sworn she felt against her ear. “I’m not going anywhere.” “Are you still in Detroit?” “Unfortunately yes, though I’d love to be there with you right now.” “Because I said yes?” “Partly,” he admitted. “But mostly because I miss you.” He missed her? He barely knew her, she thought in astonishment. How could he possibly miss her? “I miss your eyes,” he clarified. There he was, reading her mind again. “And your voice. You’ve got a fine voice, lady.” “Thank you.” “Have you ever thought about singing?” Charlie blinked. Sing? Her? “Nope.” “Think about it,” he insisted. “I want to do a duet,” he chuckled. “And I don’t mean of the horizontal tango.” She couldn’t resist a laugh and boy, did it feel good. Amazingly, she felt the headache abate a little. “I need to ask you something.” Charlie tensed, the possibilities of what he might ask endless. “Okay,” she said, giving him uncertain permission. “Are you okay?” She frowned. “What do you mean?” “I mean, are your headaches still bothering you?”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “Why?” she wondered softly, trying not to sound threatened, willing to give him a chance to explain himself. He sighed, the sound unreadable. “Because I’m worried about you. Damn it, woman,” he sound exasperated now. “Rachel’s worried about you and that worries me. Have you been to the doctor yet?” Warmth swept through her veins. He cared. “I will, today. I promise.” He was quiet for a moment, giving her time to picture him in her mind. “Charlie, please see the doctor. Even if it’s just to rule out anything serious.” Her racing heart slowed, soothed by his concern. “I will.” “I’m not ordering you to do anything,” he said. “You can make your own decisions, but I’m begging you, see the doctor.” Tears suddenly stung her eyes. Either Rachel had blabbed about Roger—which she highly doubted—or Nik had figured out from her outburst she wouldn’t let him push her around. Better still, he appeared to respect that about her. At the acknowledgement, his credibility soared in her mind. Again she’d misjudged him. “I will,” she whispered, trying to hold back the rational but unwanted tears. “I will.” “Is Rachel with you?” She nodded. “Upstairs.” “Good. Now there’s something I’d like you to do for me, Charlie.” Where she had expected tension, Charlie instead felt a tiny thrill flutter in her belly. Right now, with his soaring credibility, he could ask her anything. “What’s that, Nik?” “I want you to take care of yourself,” he confessed. “I want you firing on all cylinders the next time we meet in person. That won’t be too far away, and I promise you this much, it will be explosive.” “Soon,” she swallowed. “Very, very soon.” He made a contented sound, almost a purr, and she marvelled at the way it resonated through her body. “Yes Charlie. Very, very soon. I’m sending you a big warm hug right now. Do you feel it?” The pragmatic part of her wanted to roll her eyes at his corny gesture, but she shut it down. He was supposed to be a bad boy rocker and here he was, turning all soft and
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser sensitive on her. It wasn’t the first time, and with everything she knew about Nik, she knew he didn’t display this side very often. She almost felt honoured, privileged. Damn if it didn’t appeal to her on a whole new level. Silently, she issued a stern warning. He would pay dearly if he was playing her. “Thank you,” she said softly, her voice genuine despite the threatening ‘survivor’ thoughts in her head. “Thank you for the letter and the phone call.” “Anytime, babe,” he said, sounding almost glib. It struck her that maybe he felt exposed, that he’d revealed too much to her. “Will you call me when you know more? About your headaches, I mean.” Chuckling, she turned when the sliding doors to her right whooshed open to reveal Rachel. Three steps behind her was an overly concerned woman, the doctor, Charlie presumed. Turning away from them to focus solely on Nik’s voice, she smiled. “Yes. I have to go. I’ll speak to you soon.” “Call me,” he said. She couldn’t tell what he was thinking or feeling, his voice guarded. Ending the call, Charlie turned to the two women. The doctor was quite young, perhaps even younger than Charlie and she stepped closer ahead of Rachel. Problem was, the concern etched in her young features scared Charlie to death. “Tell me about your headaches, Charlie.” ~ Nik dropped back to the pillow, unable to quell the sick feeling in his gut. He should be there with her, standing by her side. She had to be scared. Hell, he was. But a tough girl like Charlie Brown wouldn’t admit her fears to anyone. He admired her fortitude but at the same time, wished she’d lean on someone’s shoulder. At least Rachel was there with her. That thought calmed him a little, though not enough, and he grew angry at the helplessness he felt. He’d been here before, struggling to understand the enormity of the situation and scared out of his mind by the way it could end. The very thought of losing Charlie before he could even explore the potential between them hit him hard. Harder than it should have considering how little he really knew about her. Needing to feel some sort of control, Nik scooted to his feet and left his room. It was almost noon, and he knew Casey would still be sleeping, probably halfway through some erotic dream about Rachel, but he didn’t care. He needed a sounding board and since Bobby’s death, Casey was the only one Nik could turn to. Pounding on the guitarist’s door with both fists, he pummelled the wood until Casey finally opened up.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “Jesus, Nik, what’s up?” Pushing through, Nik entered the dim, musky room, the air still heavy with sleep. Hearing Casey close the door, Nik felt some of the tension leave his shoulders. At least Casey wasn’t throwing him out, but considering how often the guy had barged into his room, Nik figured he owed him one. “Tell me what’s going on with Charlie,” Nik demanded. “What has Rachel told you?” Sighing sleepily, Casey shook out his flattened bed hair and pulled his robe tight around his waist. “She’s been having headaches. I told you this already. She’s not worried but Rachel is.” Across the dim distance, their eyes met. “She’s seeing the doctor now.” “I know you’re concerned man, but honestly,” Casey shrugged. “You know as well as I do the business we’re into. Anything could be causing those headaches. The loud music, the drums, the crowd noise, the sleepless nights,” Casey rattled off the possible causes and then pointed a bony figure at him accusingly. “You, torturing her to jump in bed with you.” “Not funny,” Nik growled. Casey shook his head. “Don’t snap at me, Nik. I’m just answering your question. Sounding out some reasonable explanations. If it’s more than that,” Casey sighed heavily, “then we’ll be there for her. I truly think she’ll be okay.” Dissatisfied, Nik began to pace the room. Casey made it sound all too easy, like he could predict the future or something. “What would you do if it were Rachel?” Casey blinked. “I’d be by her side in a heartbeat man, you know that. But it’s different with you and Charlie. There are complications.” Complications. There was that word again. Nik wished he could scoop it up in his hands and tear it to bits. Her admission to wanting to be with him negated the complications, left him an opening to jump on an airplane and fly down to Vegas. But he didn’t want to be in her face on this one. He wasn’t going to push her. It was Monday, time enough before his next gig to fly down and back again if needed. But he didn’t want to risk riling her. Anger wasn’t useful in this situation, so he figured he’d have to sit it out right here. As tough as it was, he’d sit through the gut wrenching wait until her results came in. Until then? Hell, he didn’t know what he’d do to fill in time. Sleeping wasn’t an option, not when he knew she was in pain. Writing music seemed like a possibility, but the idea of concentrating on anything other than Charlie left him feeling like a cheat.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “I’m here for you man,” Casey offered. “Tell me what you need.” Raising his eyes from the trodden carpet, Nik let his expression fall. “Call Rachel, get an update. Whatever you do, don’t leave me hanging.” ~ Alone with the doctor in the darkened hospital room, Charlie lifted the towel packed with ice from her forehead. After a round of examinations, a CAT scan and a whole lot of explanation about the late nights, loud music and crazy hours, she’d watched the doctor pick up the phone. The litany of yes’s and uh-huh’s and mmm’s didn’t make her feel any better about what was going on. Although Rachel stood outside her room, Charlie felt more alone than she’d ever been in her life. This was worse than her father taking off. Worse than the string of replacements her mother had brought home before deciding to go solo. Gavin didn’t even rate a mention. As for Roger, well, that was the only time in her life when she’d felt this afraid. The not knowing was the hardest, followed very closely by the waiting. Listening to the doctor’s sounds and expecting to hear some kind of proper medical-speak, Charlie could only twiddle her thumbs and wait. Nervousness twitched her right eye, acid pooled in her stomach and dread weighed down her heart. Outcomes scrolled through her mind: she had a tumour, an aneurysm; she’d never be allowed to touch her drum kit again, play live, or live this life. God, it would kill her to give it all up. She’d go insane for sure. “Right.” The Doc’s voice startled her, disrupting the train of nightmares chugging through her brain. Thank heaven for small mercies, Charlie thought. “So, what’s wrong with me?” The Doc smiled. “Nothing. At least, nothing physiologically. There’s nothing wrong with your hearing, your brain scans are normal and your eyesight is perfect. There is no medical reason for your headaches.” Charlie heard the tone of the doctor’s voice and knew the woman wasn’t finished. So she sat up, kept her mouth shut and her ears open. “I’m leaning more toward a psychological reason.” Charlie sighed, disappointment rushing through her. “So I’m crazy then?” The Doc chuckled softly and walked across the room to sit on the edge of the bed. “No Charlie, I don’t think you’re crazy. But there may be issues you might want to talk about.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Perhaps a painful event from your past.” She smiled. “Or the present. Enough stress or anxiety to trigger these headaches.” “I don’t mean to sound ungrateful, Doc,” Charlie started. “But a lot of people have issues from their past and everyone has stress in their lives. I’m no different. The question is why am I getting these headaches and how do I stop them?” The Doc nodded and stepped over to her briefcase to pull out a handful of pamphlets. “I understand what you’re saying, but Charlie, I don’t think it’s necessary to order any more invasive tests until you start dealing with the stress in your life. Have you thought about counselling?” Great, Charlie thought. Go see a shrink. That was just what she needed. What if the press got hold of that kind of information? She could see the headlines now: Charlie Brown – Crazy Drummer. Or worse. But as worried as she was about that, she wasn’t about to keep going against doctor’s orders. She’d do the bed rest thing, get some peace and quiet every now and then, and take the aspirin as prescribed. Only if the headaches got worse would she take the next, unimaginable step. “Promise me you’ll at least consider it, Charlie.” Nodding, Charlie handed her the ice pack. “I’ll think about it.” “I know what you rock stars are like,” chirped the Doc. “You’re a stubborn lot. But honestly, don’t write this off as psychobabble crap. It could be just what you need, Charlie.” “Maybe,” Charlie conceded. “But before I go down that road, there’s something else I need. Thanks, Doc,” she climbed down off the bed. Her mind firmly on the greatest stress reliever she could imagine. “I’m glad there’s nothing really wrong with my head.” Leaving the hospital room, Charlie walked straight into Rachel’s arms and sighed a silent prayer of thanks. She didn’t do scared very well, usually lost the plot big time, so to have the fear quenched was like a heavy weight off her shoulders. Neither of them uttered a word as they left the hospital and jumped into the waiting car. As Rachel was about to instruct the driver to take them back to the hotel, Charlie grabbed her hand. “Wait.” Rachel eyed her curiously. “Where do you want to go?” Of course, Rachel didn’t need to actually ask the question because it was probably written on Charlie’s forehead. The airport, no questions asked. It didn’t matter that she had no luggage. She had ID and a credit card that would do. She could buy whatever she needed in Detroit, but she doubted she’d need anything other than Nik.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser ~ As the sky darkened, Nik stood on the balcony and stared out over the strange city, his T-shirt plastered to his body by the breeze. It wasn’t his first time to Detroit, but in all the times he’d been here, he’d never once explored the city. He had no idea where any of the tourist spots were, couldn’t care less about the ‘must-sees’ in a city that lived and breathed cars. Tonight, he had even less reason to care. He hadn’t heard from her, and the longer the silence extended, the worse he felt. Silence was never a good thing, despite the old saying that no news was good news. She promised she’d call. And here he was, almost twelve hours later without hearing from her. His fingers itched to dial, his brain tossing aside the possibility that he’d look like an obsessed stalker. She knew he wasn’t stalking her. But she probably didn’t know how much he needed to see her, either. Every cell in his body ached to touch her, to hold her in her time of need. The need to comfort her surpassed the need to make love to her and rocked him to the core. He’d never been a sensitive guy, never been the type to play the soft loving man. Always, always he’d chosen to be the macho guy, the sexed-up egotist who’d settle for nothing less than a blowjob. He’d changed. A lot. And he couldn’t pinpoint a single cause. In the last three years, his life had been shaken by at least three events. Bobby’s death. The doctor’s warnings. Charlie. He smiled as her name filtered through his thoughts. When was the last time he’d spent so much time thinking about a woman? Not since Penny had he felt more than a passing sexual interest. It shamed him to think it had been so long. At the same time, it filled him with hope. Damn it, he needed to know if she was all right. He stepped into the room and stalked over to the phone. Lifting it from its cradle, he began dialling her number. Abruptly, he stopped and slammed it back down. No. He didn’t want to seem like he was watching her. That kind of crap wasn’t a part of his nature. She was her own woman and he had no business dictating to her. But why hadn’t she called? She said she would and after her confession earlier, he didn’t want to believe she could brush him off so easily. He reached for the phone again. A second later, he pulled his arm away. So lost in his struggle, he jumped when the phone actually rang. He snatched it up and put it to his ear. “Charlie?”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser She chuckled. “Hey, babe. Miss me?” He sighed, the tension evaporating from his shoulders. “You know it. Are you okay?” “Mmm-hmm,” she hummed, sounding relaxed and deeply content. It served to soothe his jagged nerves. “Thank God.” “Nik?” His head snapped to attention, the need in her voice unmistakable. He’d have to be made of stone not to hear it. “What is it, baby?” “Open your door.” His heart stopped and then kicked into overdrive when his numbed brain finally put two and two together. Dropping the phone on the bureau, he ran to his door and pulled it open. There she was, standing like a dream in his doorway, her cell to her ear and the biggest smile on her face. Reaching out, he grabbed a fistful of her cotton shirt and pulled her inside. He kicked the door closed, wrapped his arms around her and held her to him. She laughed and tried to wriggle free. Not this time, baby, he thought, staring down into those soulful eyes and the desire surging through them. “I can’t believe you’re here,” he grinned. “Nik?” He blinked. “Yes?” “I didn’t come here for comfort. I came here for the night you promised me.” In two minds, he hesitated. “Baby, you’ve just been through a terrible ordeal.” Taking his face in her hands, she stood on tiptoes and stared hard into his eyes. “I’m fine. Now shut up and kiss me already.” Not needing to be told twice, he pressed his lips to hers in a kiss meant to be soft and tender. What he got in return however, was a fiery passion that threatened to burn him alive. Hot need curled through him, coming to rest in his groin. His hands slid up her solid back and into her hair, holding her head firmly to his. Thrusting his tongue into her mouth, he was met with a hunger that teased his restraint. Yes, he wanted her in his bed, but didn’t she need to talk through the last twelve hours? She’d probably faced a daunting health crisis and instead of talking, she wanted…what?
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Action. The word hit him like a wrecking ball, shattering his need to comfort her. The dam holding back his intention of making love to her broke and he responded by pushing her back against the door. The air whooshed out of her lungs as her arms circled his neck and her legs embraced his hips. “Sorry,” he managed, hoping he didn’t hurt her. “Don’t be,” she grunted, assisting him to pull her T-shirt over her head. As her hair fell about her shoulders, his eyes zeroed in on those breasts dressed in pink lace. Every deep, laboured breath pushed them forward, enticing him. “Touch me, Nik,” she demanded, her voice hoarse. “Put your hands on me.” Pulling back a little, he peered into her eyes. Her words were music to his ears. It would kill him if it all turned out to be a hallucination. When she blinked, slowly and dreamy, he had to swallow. The sensuality of the move left him breathless. This woman had him in knots. He wanted her with a force and power that made him dizzy. With their gazes locked, Nik cupped her breasts in his hands, gently squeezing until her eyelids drooped heavily and her head thunked back against the door. Dipping his head, he pressed his lips to the hollow between the two soft mounds and huffed against her delicate skin. Her nipples hardened even more in response. Above him, her head lifted and then bent forward, her hair brushing against his face. When her lips moved against his ear, he heard her breathe deep and slow, shuddering upon exhale. As she slid her hands into his hair, he dragged his tongue along the valley between her breasts, moving up toward her face and those luscious lips again. “You’ve been on my mind all day,” she whispered. “I’ve thought about you non-stop.” Smiling against her neck, he nipped her skin, heard her gasp and then clamped his lips on her. Determined to mark her, he sucked the supple skin into his mouth, lapped it with his tongue and then gently let go. Smoothing it over with butterfly kisses, he felt satisfied with his handy work. The bruise would fade eventually but she’d always know who’d given it to her in the first place. “Yes,” she sighed. “Yes, yes, yes.” Kissing his way up her neck and along her jaw, he found her lips again. Hot air greeted him along with a blazing wet kiss. Her tongue entered his mouth, explored the small space with intensity. He opened his eyes and found her staring at him, her eyes curious and playful. There was no dazed expression there, nothing to suggest that she’d been drugged by his touch. Good. He wanted her completely clear headed. “Charlie?”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser She smiled, her lips plump from his kiss. “Yes, Nik?” “You know how I promised a night of hot and wild sex?” “Mmm?” He grinned. Hell, if she didn’t need to talk, then he wasn’t going to keep asking. “Then let’s get this started.” Chapter 6 She laughed, the sound light but short-lived as her eyes turned from hazel to hot fudge chocolate with desire. Wriggling, she detangled her legs from around his hips and landed back on her feet. Those warm hands found their way under his T-shirt, splayed against the hard ridges of his six pack and then pushed him backwards. Nodding, she steered him urgently, her eyes never leaving his until the bed caught the backs of his legs and sent him tumbling backwards. Even then she was quick to climb on top, straddling his hips, setting her hot centre over his pounding flesh. Needing to see her, Nik reached behind her, unhooked the clasp on her bra and let it fall away. He grinned. Much better. Filling his hands with her breasts, he manipulated and squeezed, rolled her nipples between his fingertips until she squirmed and nodded. Hearing more yeses spurred him on, rolling her onto her back and settling between her thighs. The position gave her more of a chance to remove his shirt as she scrunched it up in her fingers and pushed it back over his head. Tracing the outlines of the muscles on his chest, she stilled momentarily before her eyes raked back up his body. He marvelled at the molten river of longing that flowed in her eyes, knowing it would mirror the slickness between her thighs. The mere thought of being inside her made him harder and thicker, the pounding so intense he thought he’d come with just a touch. There was so much he wanted to do with her and he decided the time for thinking was over. It was time to act. Pushing up from her, he stood at the foot of the bed; her legs trapped between his as he unbuttoned his jeans and lowered the zipper. Watching her eyes drop to his groin brought him immense satisfaction, and when he finally revealed his throbbing penis, she grinned and moaned. She sat up, reached to grab his jeans and yanked them down his legs. Free from the tight confines, his cock sprang into the air, needing so very much to be touched, tasted, licked. A quick glance from her told him she thought so too, and when she wrapped her fingers around the shaft, Nik thought he’d died and gone to heaven. “Oh yes, baby,” he groaned throatily, hands on hips, head thrown back to enjoy the sensations she brought.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Her hand slid up and down the shaft before she grazed a fingertip over the sensitive tip. He groaned with pleasure while she stroked him, her touch firm and sure. The girl knew what she was doing because it sure as hell was driving him crazy. Her palms flattened against the lower part of his taut belly, lightly pushing against him as she took him into her mouth. He wasn’t so far gone to understand what she was doing so he stayed as still as he could, even though the urge to drive into her mouth threatened to break him in half. But, oh, her lips were so tight around him, her mouth hot and wet, that tongue dancing along his shaft expertly. If she didn’t let up, he’d lose complete control. He was about to stop her when she started dragging those gorgeous lips along the length of him. Up and down. In and out. Hot and wet. Oh God, oh God, oh God. All that mattered was watching her from this high, feeling her suck until he couldn’t take anymore. “God damn it,” he grunted and pulled his hips away. “Why are you still dressed, woman?” When he looked into her eyes, the playfulness was gone, replaced with unadulterated sexual hunger. That expression threatened to devour him, but he wasn’t afraid. Hell no, he was ready to jump in feet first, sink in as far as he could. But he wasn’t going anywhere with her still wearing jeans. Tugging on her hands, he brought her to her feet easily. She watched as he fumbled with the catch on her jeans. Damn buttons, he cursed, hurriedly trying to set her free. Her fingers glided over his hands, stopping him momentarily. Sliding her fingers between his, she deftly released the buttons that gave him so much trouble. It struck him dumb that she was so calm and yet he was so…frenzied. Like she’d forgotten about the wild and sweaty sex part. Well, he was going to fix that, kick her heart rate up a notch or two. Before she could get the jeans off, he pushed his hand down the front and in between her thighs, finding her slick folds. Her breath caught as she gripped his shoulders, widening her stance for him. “That’s better,” he hummed. “Isn’t it?” She only made a soft cry as he rubbed and circled, feeling her grow wetter and hotter for him. Lord but she felt great. Cupping her mound in his palm, he inched his fingers toward her entrance, swirled a fingertip around to find the threshold and then drove two fingers deep into her passage. Her arms circled his neck, as she held on, her breath haggard as she stared into his eyes. “Don’t you dare stop,” she growled before her hips began to rock. He watched as she ground those womanly hips against his hand, her eyes screaming at him to let her have her release. Now they were both frenzied. He couldn’t wait any longer. Withdrawing his hand, he tugged her pants from her hips, waited until she
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser stepped out of them and then grabbed a condom from the bedside table. Sheathing himself, he turned to face her. But she had the jump on him, literally, when she leapt into his arms and forced him back to the bed. He growled approvingly, guiding her onto his shaft. Two years he’d been waiting for this moment. All his dreams and fantasies of her paled in comparison. She was real, she’d come to him and this night was theirs for the taking. Nik groaned at her heat, at the way it tested his patience and urged him to lose himself now. Grunting, he watched her swallow him whole. She didn’t wait for him, rocking her hips and riding him with speed. Nik fell back on the bed, watched her lithe body move in the light and suddenly wished he’d turned off the unromantic glare of the fluorescent globe. She’d be magical in the dark, the sheen of sweat on her skin glistening in the moonlight. The urge and drive in her mesmerised him as she tugged his hands and brought him into a sitting position. Buried deep inside her, he felt her muscles tighten and knew she was close. Ah, that was better; the wild vixen inside had finally broken free. He could watch her for hours, yet she seemed determined to hurry this along. Nik wasn’t ready to give in just yet. He flipped them, tucking her body under his, her hips on the edge of the bed where he stood and drove into her powerfully. Fondling her breasts, he watched the emotions skitter across her face as she neared her climax. Despite the need building in her, he saw a peacefulness that floored him. He wanted to know her thoughts but when her eyes connected with his, his mind fell silent. Bringing her legs up to rest on his shoulders, he found a new angle, one to let him caress her deeper. He kissed her feet, smoothed his hands over her slender calves, all the while feeling like he was going to explode. He’d promised her hot and wild and damn it, he was going to deliver. “Nik,” she cried out. “Don’t stop.” He heard her, obeyed her command, and stroked the entire length of her passage until her body began to shudder. At that moment, he set her legs down and pulled her against him, needing to see her eyes when she hit orgasm. What he found was so breathtakingly beautiful it defied words. All he knew was that he didn’t want it to stop. Yes he wanted to come, but no, he didn’t want to have to pull out of her. This was where he wanted to be. And with a jolt, he realised one night was never going to be enough. ~ Charlie registered the shift in his eyes as the orgasm soared through her body. She bucked against him, feeling his hands on her hips supporting her, drawing her closer. While the aftershocks rippled through her, she realised he hadn’t found his release. But when she looked into his eyes, she could have sworn he didn’t want to find it. At least,
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser not yet. Her suspicions were confirmed when she settled and he stayed buried inside her. “Nik?” He shook his head. “Not yet,” he smiled. “Not yet, baby. Don’t stop yet.” Laying her back on the bed, he covered her body with his, rocking his hips gently. It was the most incredible sensation she’d ever experienced. Before, with Gavin, when she’d climaxed—and sometimes even earlier—he pulled out, rolled over and went to sleep. It stunned her that she was still wet, that he still slid so easily, that her body loosened and accepted him for round two. Her heart pounded in her chest at the idea of it and suddenly, she didn’t want him to go. Wrapping her legs tightly around his hips, she hooked her feet together and pulled his hips harder against hers. But Nik wasn’t going anywhere. His lips on hers still held a fiery heat that stirred her belly. It left her wanting to show him how much she could pleasure him and so she rolled them. Kneeling over him, she did the unthinkable and pulled her hips away. Nik growled and shook his head, his hands gripping her hips to prevent her from leaving. With a wink, she eased his hold, turned her body to face his feet and then guided him back inside. “Oh baby.” Words erupted from his mouth as she rolled her hips, lifting herself away and then driving back down. He tried to thrust but she held him down, prepared to torture him until he finally succumbed. Quickening her pace, she braced her weight on his thighs, her hips carrying out a dance that left her breathless. When he jerked his hips this time, she didn’t have the strength to keep him still. From under her, he drove into her, his hands cupping the cheeks of her bottom in a most erotic touch. She thought she was going to come apart at any moment with the fire licking through her body and just when her orgasm began, he lifted her, set her on hands and knees and rocked her from behind. “Nik,” she breathed, his name sounding so right. “Nik,” she cried again as the contractions grew stronger. “Oh Nik, Yes!” She felt him lose control then, as he drove into her and filled her perfectly. The heat from his erection ignited a new set of contractions as her whole body vibrated under his touch. Don’t stop, she prayed, don’t stop. As if he heard her, he continued until her name slipped from between his lips and she felt him explode inside her. She came with him, the need to be one with him strong and enticing.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Spent, she collapsed on the bed, her body exquisitely exhausted. But she wasn’t off the hook yet as he rolled her over and devoured her mouth in a kiss that would’ve knocked her socks off were she wearing any. Where she thought he’d disappear into the bathroom, he instead lay down beside her, pulled her body flush against his and held her possessively. “Amazing,” he breathed, the word soft against her ear. His hands roamed her back, pressed her closer to him still. “Don’t go.” With a huff, she pulled her head back and cupped his face with her hands. “Oh Nik, I’m not going anywhere just yet. You promised me a whole night, remember?” A lazy, knowing grin spread across his face. “I remember. One night, more than one time.” She nodded. “I’m hungry.” “Room service?” Grinning, she winked. “Ice cream and lots of chocolate.” “Oh yeah,” he sighed, his lips resting against her temple. “The only way to go after such amazing sex.” Warmth spread through her at the sound of his words. Amazing sex? Hell yeah. He knew how to touch a woman that was for sure. She thought the sex had been incredible, but to hear him say it out loud left her world spinning. Any fear she had of this night fizzling into a frivolous waste of time was dashed as she stared back into his glazed green eyes. Despite talk of room service, he hadn’t moved an inch. At least, not away from her. If anything, he hugged her body closer to his, sliding his thigh between hers. His fingers on her hips were firm, unrelenting, and damn it, re-igniting her arousal. “Nik,” she hummed, not wanting to destroy the moment, but she meant it when she said she was hungry. “I’m still hungry.” He chuckled, though the sound was more of a chuff. His breath puffed against her face, warm and all Nik. “I’ll order room service in a minute,” he assured her, kissing her temple. “Are you okay?” she frowned. He seemed so exhausted. Nik only smiled. “Baby, I’m better than okay. I don’t even know if there is a word in the English language for what I’m feeling right now.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Curious, she encouraged him to try. Tucking a wayward strand of hair behind her ear, he closed his eyes briefly, opening them as he opened his mouth to speak. “Euphoric,” he whispered. “Exhilarated,” he pressed a kiss to her lips. “High as a bloody kite.” Adrenaline rushed through her knowing she’d done this to him. Sliding her hand over his muscled chest, she smiled her appreciation for his kind words but he wasn’t finished. “Charlie, I’m not kidding. It might sound clichéd, but I’m floating on cloud nine.” “I don’t know what to say, Nik.” Smoothing the pad of his thumb over her eyebrow, he pressed his palm to her cheek. Leaning toward her, he nibbled her bottom lip, stilled momentarily, and then smiled. “So don’t say anything,” he said against her mouth. “Just enjoy this feeling with me.” Her hand stroked his side as she nodded. This was completely new to her and she didn’t know what to do or think. Blown away by the sincerity in his voice, she could only link her arms around his waist and hold on. When her tummy grumbled, reminding them she was hungry, neither Nik nor she moved. Oh, he smiled knowingly, but didn’t set about calling room service. “Pity the phone’s out of reach,” he sighed, causing her to laugh. “I’m thinking ice cream might make for an interesting addition.” She was almost afraid to ask. “Addition?” He looked at her earnestly, as if she was mad for even voicing the question. “To round three.” With her heart thudding in her chest, Charlie ignored his protest and wriggled off the bed. Crossing the room, she picked up the phone and dialled room service. She placed the order, adding a few more items that could definitely spice up the sex. When she was finished, she found him right behind her, listening to her order. “Oh yeah,” he sighed contentedly, pressing against her back. She felt his arousal nudge her bottom and wished like hell she had a condom in her hand. Needing to touch him, she slid a hand between their bodies and whipped her head around when she found the latex already in place. Nik only smiled wickedly before she felt his hand brush the inside of her thigh. It sent a quiver through her body that left her knees the consistency of jelly. Lord but he was going to drive her insane by sunrise. “Round three,” he whispered, his lips leaving their mark on her ear as he wound his arms around her waist and pulled her back to him.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Nudging her feet wider, he slid his cock between her thighs. She felt it rub against her swollen lips and gently rocked her hips to encourage the sensation. “Room service won’t be long,” she breathed, resting her head on his shoulder. No more words came when he cupped her breasts and teased them. She acted instinctively, covering his hands with hers, intertwining her fingers with his. His lips on her neck were urgent, hot, undeniably delightful. “Nik,” she said his name again, liking the way it rolled off her tongue and suddenly she understood what it would be like to chant his name with each wonderful thrust. Arching back into him, she bucked her hips harder, feeling him press against her clit. Walking them toward the bed, he chuckled softly. “Can we finish before room service gets here?” She shook her head, knowing she wanted to see what delectable tricks he could play with their order. Still, she didn’t know if she could wait. Her insides felt like they were on fire and the only relief she could see in sight was to have him inside her, dousing the flames the way only Nik knew how. “It’s up to you, babe,” he grunted, sounding as ready to burst as she felt. “But since we’re going to spend the entire night making love, you shouldn’t feel rushed.” The words to “All Night Long” scrolled through her mind, slow and deliberate, leading her imagination down an erotic path. As the lyrics played to the movie rolling in her head, Charlie began to sway in time with the beat she heard. Feeling light headed and full of possibilities, she heard the words tumble out of her mouth in a voice she barely recognised as her own. Much to her surprise, she was singing. “When you touched me It felt like I would burn Don’t wanna live without your touch Feel your hands on my skin Your eyes deep in mine I wanna make love to you All night long.” She smiled, letting her body do the talking, encouraging Nik to move in time with her. His heart thumped in his chest against her back while his heated breath fanned her cheek. Ever since she’d met him, he’d inspired her to take risks, try things she’d never even considered before, and it had paid off. Here she was, travelling the world with her friends, playing to packed houses every time she stepped on stage. Somewhere, in all the adventure, she’d built a connection to this man like she’d never experienced before. It stretched beyond the physical, and far beyond the playful teasing, to touch something deep inside Charlie. The heat of it helped melt the emotions frozen in time and strangely called to her to believe.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “Sing it again for me, baby,” he whispered, sounding pleased. “I love your voice.” She started the chorus of the song again, smiling and turning around when he joined her. The words rang true for her, she really did find his touch so hot it could burn. And when he stared deep into her eyes during sex, she felt as if she would explode. “We sound good together,” she noted. “If I do say so myself.” He chuckled, cradling her face gently in his hands. “I knew we would. Just like I knew that being with you would rock.” When she opened her mouth to speak, there was a knock at the door, followed shortly by a polite call of ‘room service’. Stepping away from her, he grabbed a robe from the back of a chair and covered himself. She watched him walk, his sure gait carrying him confidently toward the door. There, he turned to her and looked from her to the bed. She giggled, realising she stood completely naked. Why hadn’t that bothered her? She’d clean forgot about it. But she climbed under the covers all the same as Nik dimmed the lights and pulled the door open. He spoke politely to the bellhop, handed over a tip and then quickly escorted the young man out of the room. It occurred to Charlie that being seen in Nik St. Eve’s hotel room, and in his bed, could be news splashed across the pages of every tabloid come sunrise. And for once, she wasn’t perturbed by the thought at all. If she had a choice, she wouldn’t want things to become public. But if it happened, then she wouldn’t exactly be throwing a tantrum either. “Should I have hidden in the bathroom?” She wondered aloud as he pushed the small cart over to the bed. Her eyes skimmed the contents of the tray before making their way to Nik’s handsome face. Lord but he looked scrumptious in his aroused state. “Not if you didn’t want to,” he smiled, plopping down on the bed beside her. Leaning over, he kissed her briefly. “I don’t think the kid even looked at you.” Without saying a word, Charlie pushed back her bedcovers, exposing her nakedness again. Crawling across to him, she untied the robe and slipped it off his shoulders, finding his hardness a complete turn-on. “Charlie,” he warned. “Don’t you go doing anything rash now.” Laughter burst out as she remembered those same words being uttered by Rachel not so long ago. “Like what?” she asked innocently before stroking him firmly. Nik’s eyes drifted shut and he fell back to the bed. While he wasn’t looking, she grabbed the can of instant whipped cream from the tray and shook it. She rolled the condom off,
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser and in seconds, trailed a line of whipped cream from his chin down his chest and belly to the tip of his cock. He groaned in approval. With a wicked smile, she dipped and took his creamy erection into her mouth, licking the cream off in long, slow swirls of her tongue. Nik groaned again. With teasing strokes of her tongue, she sucked the cream from his belly, then his chest. Straddling him, she continued up the line of whipped cream until she reached his chin, where she suckled a little longer. “Like that,” he moaned. But his dazed act was just that, an act, as he wrestled the can away from her and flipped her onto her back. “Who’s being rash now?” she teased playfully as he held the can over her right breast. “Close your eyes for me.” Complying, she waited as he shifted into position above her head, one knee nestling into the mattress at each of her ears. His scent filled her nose and a quick peek told her that he was right there, his hardness within reach of her mouth. But she held off, waiting to see what he was going to do with that cream. The cold hit her nipple first as he swirled the can over her breast. She giggled. He covered the entire mound, making it feel like a snow covered mountain. Charlie felt something scrape over her nipple but before she could ask, cream touched her lips. She opened, closed, tasted a strawberry under the cream and grinned. “Very nice,” she ground out as he began to eat the cream from her. The contrast between the cold cream and his hot lips was divine. The only sounds she could make were those of a woman being touched so intimately, so lovingly. “More,” was the only real, intelligible word she could say. But he only chuckled and covered her left breast with cream. Another scrape across her nipple and this time she tasted banana under the cream. His hands smoothed over her belly, gently swirling in circles that brought heat to her groin. He inched closer, though never touched her lower than the triangle of hair at the apex of her thighs. The heat from his lips on her breast as he cleaned away the cream left her a little short of breath, but when he changed tack and headed south, she held her breath in anticipation of the first touch. His lips glided along her inner thighs, his stubble grazing across her ultra sensitive skin. His hands rested on her hip bones as he slowly—ever so damned slowly—kissed his way closer to her most intimate parts. Her eyes popped open when he sucked her clit into his mouth, her vision filled with the hardness of him. Glad she’d removed the latex barrier, she didn’t hesitate. Wrapping her fingers around his shaft, she mimicked the sensations he elicited in her, watching
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser and feeling him grow harder, longer, thicker right before her eyes. Lifting her head, she took him into her mouth. Her hips bucked when he dragged his tongue along her valley and swirled provocatively at the entrance. He held her still, spread her legs wider, building the expectation she felt. She was about to ask why he lifted her leg but then swallowed her question when he bit her ass cheek. Charlie sucked in a breath, realising the deep hickey she’d find in the morning. Damn. Taking his cock in her hand, she fondled him, her mind picturing the things he could do down there between her legs. But nothing prepared her for the sensation of his tongue pushing inside her, heating her through. She cried out, a sound, no words, completely in acceptance of what he was doing. The feel of him moving inside her, flicking against her left her feverish. Her hands dropped away as her mind was totally consumed by him. And then, in a blinding flash, it wasn’t enough. She needed him inside her, stroking her deeply, leaving her breathless and speechless. The need pulsed through her, moving her to action as she wriggled out from under him and turned him on his back, Her shaky hands fumbled with the condom until Nik’s fingers steadied her, guided her. She straddled him again, waited for his gaze to connect to hers and then took him in with a shout of satisfaction. ~ As her head rested on his chest, he traced indeterminable patterns over her bare back, skimmed over her buttocks lightly and then stroked her hair. Round three had surpassed both rounds one and two, like a greyhound streaking ahead of the field in chase of the toy rabbit. Only this rabbit wasn’t a toy. She was a wild mix of untamed passion and unrivalled desire. And he wanted her all to himself, day after day. “Charlie?” “Hmm?” she hummed dreamily. He wished she would look up at him but knew that if she did, they’d dive straight back into sex again. “Is Charlie your given name? Or is it a nickname?” She tilted her head then, her silken hair falling away to reveal her satisfied expression. “Nickname.” Tracing the strong jaw line, he gave in to the temptation of staring into those fudge coloured pools. “What is your name then, babe?” She smiled. “Promise me you won’t laugh.” He gave a single nod. “I won’t laugh.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Rolling, she propped herself up on an elbow and looked down at him. “My given name is Catherine.” He smiled. “I like that very much. Can I use it?” She hesitated. “Apart from Rachel, no one really knows it.” He nodded. “Okay, then can I use it when we’re alone, like this? Can I call it out when you’re driving me wild?” Slowly, her smile returned as her free hand came to rest on his chest. The glint in her eye suggested she was ready for round four. Hell, he was just coming to grips with round three. “Oh yeah, baby.” And as quick as that, it was on. She plastered her lips to his in one incredible kiss that made him glad he was lying down. Because if he’d been standing, his legs would sure as hell have buckled under the intensity. Chapter 7 Vegas was unlike any other town she’d played, but with the memories of her time with Nik still fresh in her mind, Charlie hardly noticed the bright lights and glitzy casinos. Their shows held new meaning for her, as she spent her waking moments finishing off three new songs. Nik’s never-ending inspiration even extended to her creativity, giving her an added element she’d never had in her writing before: a deep connection with a man. Oh, she’d written about love and hurt and betrayal, but she usually steered clear of joy and elation and trust. For now though, she kept her songs under wraps. New York was the place and time. Thankfully, it wasn’t too far away and she would finally be able to reveal the songs to the band. Rachel noticed the difference in her as soon as she returned, three days after she left. Her one night with the bad boy of rock had turned into two and came perilously close to continuing into a third. He’d hinted in the most obvious fashion that he wanted her to stay, writing don’t go in the steam on the bathroom mirror while she showered. Damn if she wasn’t tempted, but she suspected her cover story would hold only so long. There were only so many excuses Rachel could use and since the doctor had ruled out any serious problems related to the headaches, Charlie couldn’t really justify staying away any longer. The ‘complete bed rest’ story was clearly wearing thin with the others. But she’d make amends by revealing her new songs. She was sure of that. And she was sure that New York would be a bash to remember. On one hand, there were the
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser new songs. On the other hand, there was Nik. Tantaliser was scheduled to play New York the same week and for the first time in months, she didn’t feel like Nik was stalking her. Now, as she stood under the hot shower, Charlie waited for some of the euphoria from the show to dissipate. It was late, almost two in the morning, but she wasn’t ready for sleep. Still hyped, she’d spent an hour with the girls in the bar of the hotel kicking back and chowing down on some greasy chips. They’d talked about the last three days, the gossip and rumours she’d missed out on being tucked away in Nik’s hotel room. Of course, her explanation that she’d spent the three days in near silence left them all the more excited to relay the news. While Charlie was glad to hear that neither Mystique nor Tantaliser had made the tabloids, she found she wasn’t too interested in the rest of the news. Her first instinct was to tell the girls to let it go and let their rivals live their own lives, but she stayed quiet. It was nice to have the entire band close by, even though she couldn’t say she’d thought about them very much over the last three days, what with Nik occupying her mind and her body. So she gave it an hour before allowing her fatigue to shine through. She disappointed them by leaving so early; usually they would have all stayed up until sunrise. On the bright side, she didn’t have to lie to them about being dead tired. Upon returning to her room, she’d stripped off her traditional rock concert garb of black jeans and black T-shirt and stepped into the hottest shower she could stand. After ten minutes, she was ready to turn in and so with a twist of her wrists she shut off the water and towelled off. With her hair wrapped in a towel, she slipped into a pair of cotton pyjamas and opened the bathroom door to the sound of the ringing phone. Charlie didn’t hesitate before charging across the room, snatching up the phone and pressing it to her ear. It didn’t escape her attention that she anticipated the sound of his voice, or the way a quiver passed over her skin at the thought of his hands on her. Once upon a time, those things would have disappointed her, left her feeling somewhat less of an empowered woman, to be so entranced by a man. Not now. Conversely, it excited her that he’d conveniently forgotten her reminder they wouldn’t be repeating those two nights any time soon. “Hey babe,” he crooned, sounding confident and incredibly awake. “How was the show?” Sinking into the overstuffed cushions scattered over the bed, Charlie grinned and pulled a vision of him into her mind. “Really good. You?” He chuckled, the sound carefree and light. “Show was good. But all I could think of was you.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Feeling her cheeks grow hot, Charlie tried not to let her imagination run away, but she couldn’t stop it. Unbidden, memories of their nights together flooded into her mind, leaving her a little short of breath. “I wasn’t sure you’d still be awake,” he continued, his deep, heavy breathing filling her ear. “I’m glad you’re there. I needed to hear your voice.” “Stop trying to charm me,” she chastised playfully. “It’ll never work.” He laughed then, full and loud, the sound all too familiar. “I don’t need it to work, honey,” he rebutted. “I’ve already had two nights with you. I know there will be more. So do you.” “Bah,” she huffed, trying to dilute the cockiness in his voice. “You’re dreaming, buddy.” “Is that right? So I shouldn’t remind you how good it felt then, huh?” “No,” she said, hearing the frailty in her voice. “No,” she repeated, more firmly this time, but it was too late. Whether or not she wanted to admit it, she was vulnerable around Nik, susceptible to his sexy swagger, those experienced hands and a pair of soulsearching eyes probing to explore every inch of her. “It’s okay to remember what we did,” he pushed, seemingly determined to pry open the double bolted doors she’d used to shut away the surging tide of need. “I think about it all the time, remember the curves of your body, the swell of your breasts, the sound of your voice when you called out my name.” Damn, damn, and double damn. She cursed as those bolts broke loose and the doors swung free. How could she resist the want swimming through her veins? All she had to do was say yes and he’d easily indulge both their fantasies over the phone. Not that that would be enough, she realised. She needed to feel his hands on her skin, hear his voice whisper at her ear. “Catherine,” he called softly. “Let me take you there again.” She stifled the affirmative response kicking to let fly. The heat sweeping through her veins chipped away at her resolve, leaving her ready to act on impulse. “Baby,” he continued. “You still want me.” “You still want me,” she ground out, remembering where this conversation went last time. “Oh yeah, I want you in my bed again. Forget just one more night honey, let’s take a whole week.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser She gasped. “Nik!” Shaking her head, she spoke rapidly, “We can’t do that. You’ve got tour dates, I’ve got tour dates, everyone will wonder where we are.” “Let them wonder,” he challenged defiantly. “Screw everyone else, baby. Tell me what you want.” Charlie swallowed. It had been so long since she’d last acknowledged what she wanted for herself. Yes, she wanted more sex with Nik. Yes, she liked being around him, and damn if his confidence didn’t rub off on her just a little bit. But a whole week? Together, alone? How on earth would they wrangle that? And what if they did? Would he expect something afterwards? Would she? “Nik,” she said breathlessly. “This was just one night, remember?” “Two,” he corrected her. “Two nights. And if I remember rightly, I almost convinced you to stay a third.” A smile tugged at the corner of her mouth before she shut it down. No. He was not going to talk her into this, not now, at two a.m., anyway. Before she could protest, he was talking again. “Think about it. We’d be alone, with no one to interrupt us. We could do whatever we wanted. And I know those two nights we spent together didn’t exhaust your appetite. If anything,” he cleared his throat, sounding somewhat heated, “those two nights only gave you a little taste of what could be. Didn’t they?” Keeping her mouth firmly shut, Charlie refused to answer. He was right and her body screamed it, lying here on the bed on fire and wanting only one man. But she wasn’t about to tell him that and she didn’t trust her voice enough to answer him. All he would need was the slightest quiver to know he was right. “You’re not an Ice Maiden,” he said softly. “You have needs too, babe. Let me tend to them.” Silence stretched out across the minutes. He was giving her time, but she wasn’t sure how much time she’d need before she could say yes. Saying so only proved she’d been sucked in the same way her mother had been time and time again. The broken promises of ever after, the empty lure of love and happiness. She wasn’t going to fall prey to that. No way. Not in this century. She had to resist the physical attraction between her and Nik for her own sake, because that was all they shared. Physical intimacy. “Maybe,” she conceded. “But I have responsibilities and I can’t leave them. It just wouldn’t be right.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser She grimaced, hearing her own words sound so thin and flimsy. He would hear it too, and she hated to think what he would say next. Hanging up right now seemed like a fine idea, even if it was to save her pride. “I’m not talking about a three car garage and cock-a-poos,” he insisted. “I’m talking about working through those physical urges you seem so keen to tuck away. Is it that you still don’t trust me?” “I know you won’t hurt me, physically,” she explained but then the lump in her throat stopped her. Admitting that she feared he’d hurt her emotionally left her too open and raw. He sighed softly. “Please don’t tell me you think I’m calling just because there’s a physical attraction between us babe,” he groaned. “I’d like to think there’s more to it than that.” “Is there?” she asked, floating the question and feeling about an inch tall for questioning his credibility. To her surprise, he chuckled. “I admit, you have an incredible body and sex with you is like dying and going to heaven, but there is more to us, Catherine. I think about you non-stop, what you’re doing, how you’re feeling, whether you’re thinking about me. Believe it or not, I am capable of non-sexual thoughts about a woman. Even one as erotic as you.” He really had a way with words. The fact he wasn’t shy about saying them out loud to her was what stumped her most, because it left him vulnerable to ridicule. Not that she would undermine him, but she imagined his mates would. She imagined the press would if they found out bad boy rocker Nicholas St. Eve had gone all gooey and mushy over the phone with her. ~ Nik waited impatiently for her answer. His foot bounced, his eye twitched and the tightness in his groin seemed to increase. Damn it, why wouldn’t she listen to reason? What had happened to leave her so distrusting? Clearly she didn’t believe relationships could last. Nor did she want to be involved in flings and affairs that lasted only a night or two. So what was her happy medium? He wondered. “You really know how to tell a woman what she wants to hear,” she finally said. He detected flattery in her voice. “It’s God’s honest truth,” he said. “I’m not joking around, Catherine.” He loved repeating her name; it sounded so feminine in comparison to Charlie and reminded him she was all woman.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “Thank you.” “But?” She sighed. “It’s too—" “Don’t you say complicated,” he warned gently. “You’ve already told me that and I know complicated inside and out. How about clueing me into what’s so complicated, Cat?” She was silent again. He’d come to think of her silence as a protective mechanism, one to save her against giving away deep dark secrets by the sound of her expressive voice. He knew exactly how expressive it could be. Details be damned, he just needed to hear her speak. “Catherine, please,” he begged. “Talk to me.” “Don’t push, Nik,” she said in a whisper so soft he almost didn’t hear it. “Is it about a previous relationship?” he urged, figuring simple yes-no questions might help her out. He heard her swallow. “Yes.” “He cheated on you?” More silence. He took that as a yes. “I’m not the cheating kind,” he said firmly. “I’ve never cheated on a woman.” “Maybe,” she said. “But you are the love them and leave them type.” He frowned. “Gossip,” he said with a firm nod. “Innuendo. Rumour. Bullshit.” “So you’ve never taken one of those groupies to bed and then cast her out on her rump the next morning?” He smiled, suppressed a chuckle at the vision in his head. “No babe, never.” “Never been with one? Or never thrown one out?” Damn but she was persistent. “Both. I have never, ever been with a groupie. And I have never thrown a woman out on her rump, as you say, after a night of sex. And for the record darling, I’ve never had meaningless sex with a woman.” “So what about us, then?”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser He wondered what her facial expression was right now. Was she aghast that she’d thought of the question? Or flabbergasted that she’d voice it? Either way, he was going to set the record straight for her, just so there was no misconception surrounding their nights together. “Us? Ah, baby,” he said, sighing contentedly. “There was nothing meaningless about the sex we shared. Why the hell do you think I’m calling you tonight? And why do you think I’ll call you tomorrow night? And the night after?” Silence. He ploughed on. “I’m not expecting anything more than the honest truth here. Either you want to continue seeing me, together in private, or not. I’m not going to judge your reasons why, but I want to know.” “Will you stop calling me if I say no?” He heard the reluctance in her voice. Just because she’d asked the question didn’t mean she wanted an answer. Well, Nik thought, she’d get an honest answer, whether or not she wanted it. “If you say you don’t want to continue having mind altering, crazy, wild sex, then I’ll still call you and we can talk about anything.” More silence. It was killing him. “I’m not going away, Catherine. I like you, with or without the sex.” “You think you can fix me, don’t you?” she snapped angrily. “Why do you think you need to be fixed?” She growled. He’d gotten to her, reached her on a plane he didn’t realise existed. It made him wonder if she’d realised it and was fighting him. If a man had cheated on her in the past, then he had to prove he was trustworthy, at least so she wouldn’t hang up on him every time he called. And it was a given he’d call. “Whatever it is, Catherine,” he said, trying to keep his voice from revealing the anger he felt toward the guy who’d hurt her, “we can work through it.” “Even if I said I just wanted to be friends?” It might kill him to never touch her again, but hell yeah. “Yes.” “Thank you,” her voice flooded with emotion, leaving his heart pounding in his chest. “Thank you, Nik.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser He wanted to know what that meant, wanted to scream out his frustrations but instead, he held his tongue. On the other end of the phone, she sniffed, blindsiding him with the thought she might be crying. His hand twisted into the bedspread, anger and compassion swirling through him uncontrollably. What he wouldn’t do to wrap his arms around her and hold her tight. His heart ached at the distance between them. “In New York,” he said softly. “You and I are going to meet up, alone. No sex this time. Just you and me, talking honestly. What do you say?” “About what?” It was a rhetorical question because they both knew the answer. But he sensed she was still hiding, shielding her broken heart from him and all the possibilities he represented. “It’s only a few days away,” he said, ignoring her question. “I will come to you. Tell me you’ll let me in.” “I don’t know if I can.” He heard pain in her voice. “I promise you, I won’t hurt you emotionally.” “I don’t know, Nik,” she persisted. “Do you want to at least try? At least give us a chance?” She took a long time thinking over his questions, and the silence threatened to snap his patience. He wanted so desperately to help her, to know what caused her pain. Okay, he accepted some guy had scarred her, but didn’t she realise that not all men were the same? Didn’t she understand he wasn’t playing games here? It sure sounded like she didn’t and he wasn’t sure if that disappointed him or upset him. Either way, he needed to let her in on a few home truths of his own. “I’ll be there for you Catherine,” he said, deciding not to wait for her answer. “In the meantime, there are two things I want you to think about. Firstly, I need you to know that before you, I hadn’t been with a woman in nearly three years.” No reaction. “And secondly, for what it’s worth, I believe there can be an us. I still believe in love and faith and by God, I’ll do what is necessary to prove you can trust me completely. Do you hear me?” There was a moment before she answered. “I hear you.” “Good,” he declared gently. “I’ll see you in New York, sweetheart.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “I’ll see you too,” she replied softly, before he heard the click of the connection being broken. Nik sighed, clicked off the phone and lay back on the bed. He stared up at the plain white ceiling and tried to forget the vulnerable sound in her voice. It was in complete contrast to the woman he’d met two years ago, with her chin held high, the victorious expression in her eyes and the strength of character radiating from her. Whatever nerve he’d hit, it was a particularly sore spot. While he was glad she no longer hung up on him, he realised he now had to work past those gaps of silence she used to protect herself. He would get through, sooner or later, and he would earn her trust. As an impatient man, he didn’t know if he could wait until they were in New York. It may only be days away, but in his heightened state of arousal, those few days felt like years. But then, he promised that they’d talk first, that there’d be no sex. Nik groaned and rolled to bury his face in a pillow. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Because if there was one thing he knew for damned certain, it was that she’d hold him to that promise. She doubted his sincerity. Surprisingly, he didn’t blame her for that. He had a media profile that hammered home his supposed playboy lifestyle, but he wished she could take him on his word. He’d told her the truth, laid his cards on the table and erased his public persona in favour of her trust. Dropping his bad boy image and knowing she could use it against him made it one of the hardest decisions of his life. Didn’t that count for anything? ~ Setting the receiver on the bed, Charlie rested her head on the pillow and finally released the breath she’d been holding. Blown away by the sincerity in his voice and the perceptiveness he possessed, she found herself almost unable to keep the truth from him. His compassion encouraged her to spill her guts and while she was almost certain he wouldn’t blab it to the media, she couldn’t bring herself to tell him about Roger. Opening up about Gavin didn’t sound hard, but when it came to those awful two years living in fear of Roger’s temper, Charlie knew her mouth wouldn’t work. And she wasn’t about to force it, either. Experience taught her talking about Roger was nearly impossible. If it hadn’t been for the closeness she shared with Rachel, Charlie didn’t think anyone would know the horror of that relationship. Sighing, Charlie closed her eyes, tried to find some relief in sleep but failed. Her noisy head was at it again, keeping her on high alert. Her eyes snapped open. She knew forcing sleep was useless and so she sat up, grabbed her guitar and plucked at the strings softly, mindlessly. Her fingers found a gentle rhythm, as soothing as a lullaby. Though no words came to her, she was calmed by the melody that seemed to write itself. Her heart slowed to its normal pace, her breathing gentled, and the various nervous twitches finally played themselves out. After a few minutes, Charlie had lulled
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser her body into quiet, a sense of serenity draping over her as she sat on the edge of her bed. Why couldn’t she feel this calm around Nik? She wondered, her left hand feeling around the bed behind her until it landed on the receiver. If only she could keep her heart rate in check and stop her libido from running amok, she could probably reveal the truth. But just the thought of Nik set her pulse pounding deep in her womb. Continuing to play, she tried to envision the outcome of telling him about Roger. If he didn’t feel sorry for her, then he’d lose respect for her because of her weakness. She didn’t want either of those emotions from him. But then, if she did tell him and he lost interest in the chase, then perhaps she would be better off. Although Nik stirred her desire for sexual contact, Charlie could live without it. She had for this long. So what if his touch set her heart racing? Who cared if the sound of his voice shook her soul? She was a self-sufficient, empowered woman and she knew she could make it on her own. With a nod, she dialled the number for his hotel, her right hand still plucking at the strings. When he picked up, she set the phone beside her on the bed and resumed the melodic lullaby she made up. His voice quieted on the other end as he listened. At the same time, Charlie summoned every ounce of courage she owned before picking up the phone and bringing it to her ear. “Gavin was the one who cheated on me,” she explained, hoping like hell Nik didn’t interrupt her. “Three times, because I was stupid enough to forgive him the first two.” She waited for some sort of response, the fingers on her right hand still strumming the guitar. To Nik’s credit, he stayed silent. “So yeah, I’ve been hurt by that kind of guy before. But it’s Roger you need to know about.” “What did he do, Catherine?” She smiled gently. Her name really sounded good coming from him. But when thoughts of Roger entered her head, the smile fell away. “Roger was a nasty man,” she swallowed, the tightness threatening to prevent her from speaking. “He liked to use his fists when all else failed.” “Oh Cat,” Nik sighed, sympathy etched into his voice. “Two years,” she continued quickly, stopping Nik before he could say how sorry he was to hear it. “Two years I stayed, hiding the bruises from my friends, keeping my mouth shut, doing what he said, trying to dodge his temper. I don’t want your pity, Nik, so
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser please don’t feel sorry for me. I don’t think I could handle it. And don’t fool yourself by thinking you can fix what they broke.” He was silent. A response for which she was thankful. “I’m damaged goods. Couldn’t even consider a white picket fence and a labra-doodle even if I wanted to. Do yourself a favour, Nik, and just forget about me.” She waited for a response but only heard more silence. “I told you it was complicated.” She didn’t give him an opportunity to respond before she hung up. She couldn’t bear to hear his voice or his words, suspecting she ruined any chance of ever seeing him again. But it was better this way, Charlie decided. A clean break after a couple of amazing nights. They’d shared a physical intimacy they’d both enjoyed, where they’d been equal partners in the giving and the receiving. She would always be thankful to Nik for that. Now that he knew just how screwed up she was, he’d stay away this time, just like she’d told him to. Sighing with relief, Charlie set aside her guitar. Finally she heard the call of sleep and so climbed under the covers, tucked herself in and switched off the light. It was better this way, she thought again as the dark welcomed her and sleep beckoned. After all, she’d told him to stay away and now she’d made sure he would. She could concentrate on her music, get back to being a rock star and move on with her life. Nicholas St. Eve wouldn’t give her a second look now, just the way she’d thought. So why, then, did she find herself hoping like hell he’d ignore every one of her demands and call her again? Chapter 8 Damn him for listening to her. Almost five days after their last phone conversation, he’d done as she asked and not called. It should have made her happy but in truth, it was killing her. When the plane landed in New York, she searched the crowds for him and checked her cell phone every five minutes, but nothing. Although Rachel gave her quizzical looks every few seconds, Charlie simply smiled at the photographers and politely signed autographs as if nothing bothered her. Just as she’d done for two years now, and just as she would keep on doing with or without Nicholas St. Eve. This was her life and she would rather stick needles in her eyes than let a man control it. With the pleasantries out of the way, she followed the rest of the band through the crowd to the waiting limo. As the others climbed in ahead of her, Charlie scanned the crowd one last time. Her heart skipped a beat and then kicked into overdrive when her eyes fell on a man bearing a striking resemblance to Nik. He was turned away, talking
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser to the hulking man beside him so she didn’t get a good view of his face. Her raging heartbeat settled when she acknowledged the short haircut. But the profile of the side of his face was so like Nik’s that she let her eyes hover for a moment longer. As the hustle and bustle around her died down and her vision tunnelled to focus on this one man, he turned to her. The second their eyes met, any doubts she had exploded. Her jaw fell open as her mind registered that it was Nik, flanked by his big burly security men. His eyes sucked her in, the emerald of them so intense she felt the heat roar through her body. Damned physical attraction, she thought as she blinked slowly. Why are you here? She demanded silently. He only smiled, winked and blew her a kiss before securing a baseball cap over his shortened hair. With a pat on each of their shoulders, his minders closed in around him, cutting off her view of the man who’d taken up residence in her mind. The crowd of eager fans swallowed them whole and she was on her own again. A tug on her hand broke her attention, bringing her face down to the open limo door where Rachel peered up at her. “Come on,” she urged, motioning for Charlie to climb in. Charlie paused, lifted her head and peered into the crowd again. Was she imagining things? Had he even been there? Calling him was out of the question because if he hadn’t been there at all, it would leave her feeling humiliated about how much she still wanted him. If he had been there, then he would be expecting her to call him. She wasn’t the kind to do as was expected of her and so whether he’d been there or not, she would not call Nicholas St. Eve tonight. With a final smile to the rest of the crowd, she ducked into the limo and watched as the door was closed for her. The silence around her was filled with unspoken demands from the women with her. She felt their eyes bore into her head, but rather than answer them—she didn’t quite know how to explain her actions—she pushed the button to lower the window. As the driver pulled away from the curb, she smiled and waved, glad for the fans providing a much-needed distraction. Once they were on the road, Charlie continued to watch the city of New York roll by. The afternoon sky darkened, city lights beginning to blink on, left her mind questioning what she’d seen. Had he really been there? And if so, why? He had nothing to gain from pursuing her, she’d told him as much on the phone. If anything, the only thing he’d receive would be a headache from all the hurdles she’d throw in his way. And if he hadn’t been there at all, why was she imagining his presence? “Hey,” Rachel’s voice sounded at her ear. “Are you okay?” Charlie nodded. “Just fine.” “What kept you?”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Glancing at Rachel, Charlie wondered whether she had to say his name at all. “Just thought I saw someone I knew, that’s all. No biggie.” A grin spread across Rachel’s lips. “Oh, I know.” It wasn’t a question and Charlie decided not to argue. She gave one firm nod and returned her gaze to the window. “Just so you understand how much you’ve affected him,” Rachel whispered. “Casey tells me he’s been a new man since LA. Whatever has gone on between you two, it’s apparently done wonders for Nik.” Charlie sighed. “And yet I’m a basket case. Who would’ve thought?” She shrugged, trying to seem carefree, but she knew Rachel would see right through it. She didn’t want to lump these feelings on Rachel when the woman had concerns of her own, but Charlie needed her friend’s support. “It’s okay to want him,” Rachel said softly. “It doesn’t have to be the most serious thing in the world and it doesn’t always have to lead to forever. You’re old enough to make your own decisions, and if you choose to have a physical fling with him, go right ahead.” Charlie smiled. “Thanks, but it’s not that simple.” Turning, Charlie watched as Rachel’s forehead crinkled in a frown. “What do you mean?” “I told him about Roger.” Rachel’s expression relaxed. “He’s not going to judge you by that. No one holds you responsible for Roger’s behaviour.” “Maybe not,” Charlie shrugged. “But I didn’t have to stick around so long.” “Did you even give Nik a chance to say what he was thinking? Or did you just hang up and leave him without a chance to respond?” Charlie didn’t answer. She didn’t have to. Rachel shook her head. “Don’t be such a scaredy-cat. I know that deep down, you haven’t given up on love yet. Maybe Nik can show you it still exists. He needs you to give him a chance.” “I don’t know, Rach. Giving him a chance might bite me in the ass.” Rachel smiled. “So you’ll have a sore butt for a while.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Charlie felt her face burn fiery hot. The hickey on her butt throbbed as if to tell her something. Rachel gave her a quizzical glance, but she stayed quiet, out of words to fend off Rachel’s persistence. Enjoying the ride to the hotel, she looked at each of her band members in turn, remembering why she’d asked them to join her on this roller coaster ride of celebrity and stardom in the first place. It was true, she hadn’t spent enough time with them lately, but then, Nik was a difficult distraction to ignore. She realised the time to make it up to them had arrived; time to reveal her newly written songs. “Um, everyone,” she started, raising her voice loud enough to be heard over the traffic. She waited for heads to turn and all eyes to be on her before she spoke again. Charlie smiled, reached into her backpack and withdrew the envelopes. Passing them out, she continued. “You all know I’ve been writing some new material. I’ve done what I can with them and want you to take a look at them now. I would dearly love to play one of these live here in New York, but it’s up to you guys.” She watched as each woman tore into her envelope and withdrew the three pieces of sheet music. Before anyone could really get reading, the limo came to a halt and the door opened to reveal the hotel. The disappointment Charlie felt was reflected on the face of each woman as they tucked away their gifts in preparation for checking in. Charlie could only shrug an apology to them for her lack of timing before they climbed out of the car. Inside, they waited as Rachel took care of the checking in arrangements. The hotel was quiet, perhaps a little too quiet though Charlie wasn’t complaining. It was late and she just wanted to go up to her room and lay down in the dark. With all this thinking, her headache made an untimely return. She hadn’t had one since being with Nik in Detroit—something else she didn’t want to think about—and she was loathe to the let the headache take hold. She was glad when Rachel turned and handed them all their key cards. Even happier when the others simply collected their things and headed to their rooms. It left her free to enjoy the quiet as she’d planned. Of course, convincing Rachel she needed some peace and quiet wasn’t going to be easy, but she suspected she could distract her friend with the mention of a certain guitarist’s name…Charlie smiled wickedly, knowing that was exactly her move if Rachel didn’t give her some space. “I’m going to turn in,” Charlie said as she hoisted one of her bags onto a luggage cart. “Do you need me for anything?” Rachel shook her head no. Strange, Charlie thought, her mind becoming a little suspicious of the way Rachel cleared her night so easily. “You go ahead Cat, I’m tired too.” Charlie stopped to give her a quizzical look. “Are you okay? You seem a little flushed.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Lifting her palm to her forehead, Rachel shrugged. “I don’t think I have a temperature, but it’s probably best to stay away, just in case.” As Rachel turned to go, it struck Charlie just why her best friend was so eager to get away. “He’s here, isn’t he?” she challenged, not needing to use Casey’s name. Rachel stopped and turned her head. “I think I’ll have a long sleep in, if that’s okay. Please tell the others not to disturb me until at least eleven, okay?” Smiling, thankful at least one of them had this relationship thing sorted out, Charlie nodded and waved Rachel on. “You got it, sister.” ~ Shutting the door softly behind her, Charlie left the lights off, preferring to move by the moonlight streaming in through the open curtains. She threw her backpack onto the chair in the corner and stripped off, leaving on only her underwear. At this time of year, New York was quite warm and she revelled in the feel of the balmy air on her skin. The silence around her comforted her as she padded across the carpeted floor to the sliding door. Pushing it open, she let the breeze and the New York City noise wash over her. It tickled the sensitive skin just below her breasts, causing her nipples to harden, the peaks straining against the thin cotton of her bra. Without understanding why her heart called to his, she wished Nik were here, his hands caressing her skin, his hot breath on her ear. Although she’d vowed not to call him, she wanted to hear his voice. It was so wrong he’d become a part of her like this, and completely criminal that she continued to allow him to invade her thoughts. But oh, the sinful pleasure he could bring was what she craved right now. Pressing her hands to the doorframe, she let her imagination run riot, encouraged it to bring her body to full arousal. Damn, if there was a chance that Casey was here in the hotel, then she knew Nik wouldn’t be far away. And if he’d come to her at the airport, then he’d come to her here. Ready to turn and grab the phone, Charlie suddenly became aware of a presence in the room. Despite the blood roaring through her body and the thumping of her heart, she heard breathing. Slow and steady, the breathing definitely belonged to a man. Her blood turned to ice. He could be anyone; he’d broken into her room, for crying out loud. And here she was standing in her underwear and completely unprepared. She peered into the dark corner, but could only make out the faintest of outlines. The phone was on the other side of the room. Making a break for it might lure him out, but to do what? Almost on cue, the intruder stepped out of the shadows and into the moonlight. Short black hair, the body of an Adonis, piercing green eyes.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “Hey babe,” he called softly, stepping toward her. “I’ll go if you want.” Charlie shook her head but didn’t move. “How did you get in my room, Nik? Jesus, you nearly gave me a heart attack.” Wants aside, he couldn’t think this was okay. “I needed to see you.” “Nik, you broke into my room. I was going to call security. You scared me.” He stepped into the moonlight and bowed his head. “I’m sorry.” “Just wait for me in the lobby next time.” His head rose, his eyes finding hers in the moonlight. “You were thinking about me.” She nodded, taking a step back. “You said that we’d talk, that there’d be no sex this time.” He stilled, his head cocked to the side in confusion. “Is that what you really want?” Turning back to the window, Charlie swallowed. What did she want? Did it matter she’d told him about Roger and he’d said nothing in response? Was it wrong to want to lose herself in him anytime he was near? She didn’t know, but she knew what her body wanted and she wasn’t going to deny it tonight. Without speaking, she looked at him over her shoulder, crooked a finger, and beckoned him. He slipped in behind her, his arms around her waist and pulled her back against him. The contact eased her confusion, the solid wall of his chest against her back steady and strong. His fingers gently rubbed the exposed skin above her panty line before dipping beneath the cotton to stroke her belly, her hip. Charlie silently thanked him for not pushing her, for keeping his promise that they’d talk before anything else. “Told you I wasn’t going anywhere,” he reminded her, his hot lips against her ear. “I know complicated, baby, like the back of my hand. You don’t scare me.” “So why haven’t you called?” she asked, hating herself for sounding so needy. Nik withdrew his fingers and turned her to face him. His eyes blazed in the dark, fierce and hungry. “Because you asked me not to. Because you sounded so damned scared and vulnerable on the phone that I didn’t want to make it worse for you.” Charlie blinked. Definitely not the answer she was expecting. “I don’t want your sympathy.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser He shook his head, his grip on her shoulders tight and unrelenting. “I don’t feel sorry for you, Catherine. I’m as angry as hell at the bastard who hurt you, but not at you. Don’t you get it?” Feeling dumb, she shook her head no. “I would never treat a woman that way and I take issue with any man who does. Men like that make me sick. I might be a bad boy rocker but honey, when it comes to lovin’, I’m just a sweet ol’ puppy dog.” Staring into his eyes, her hands fisting into his shirt, Charlie could only open her mouth. Her body was no longer under her control. “Why?” “Because a man who uses abuse to gain power over someone is a dishonourable bastard. That’s why there are laws against it. And besides…” Some of the ferocity in Nik’s eyes eased as a smile crept onto his lips. “I know that when I treat a woman right, she pays me back in so many wonderful ways. Why would I want to ruin that?” Licking her dry lips, Charlie could only imagine what he meant by that. But her tongue distracted him. She watched his eyes zero in on her mouth and silently demanded he kiss her. He didn’t. Instead, his eyes met hers again while his grip on her shoulders fell away. Free from his hold, she swayed a little until his hands found the curves of her hips and tugged her closer. “I’m not going to hurt you, Catherine. I know you want to believe me, you want to trust me. It’s okay if you don’t, but please don’t shut me out anymore. Please don’t hang up on me.” “Okay,” she managed, her tongue sticking to the roof of her mouth. Lord but she needed some water or she’d burn up. “You don’t have to hold back around me,” he continued. “Do what you want, say what you want.” “I thought you didn’t like that in a woman.” He chuckled. “I didn’t,” dipping his head, he brushed his lip against hers. “Until I met you.” He pressed another kiss to her lips, this time longer, hotter. “I’m yours for the rest of the night. What do you want to do?” Like there was a choice, she thought hungrily. He’d ignited her need and he wasn’t going anywhere until he’d put out the flames. With a naughty wink, she turned, resumed her position in front of him and wiggled her bottom again. His fingers slipped under her panties, dragged them down over her hips until she stepped out of them. Feeling his jeans scrape against the backs of her legs and bottom aroused her further until she
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser thought she couldn’t take it. With her heart pounding and her breathing rapid, Charlie bent forward, arched her back and tilted her hips for him. Nik sucked in a long breath before she felt his fingers circle and rub against her, teasing and tantalising. She heard his zipper and wondered how long he’d keep up the torture before she felt him inside her. They’d been apart too long, she needed the physical connection with him like she needed air. More importantly, he’d kept his promise. They’d satisfy their physical desires and then talk more. Did he feel the same way? God but she hoped so. He slid into her, his hands on her hips as he stroked the length of her. Charlie gripped the doorjamb as his singsong voice filled the air, telling her he’d missed her, that he didn’t think he’d ever get enough. The cool breeze on her chest reminded her she was still wearing her bra but, almost as if by ESP, he unhooked the clasp and threw it away. As her breasts fell free, the night breeze caressed them. She liked his long, slow strokes, the way they made her insides grow hotter. Even better were his hands massaging her back, brushing against the sides of her breasts, making them tighten with each touch. When he reached around and cupped them in his hands, Charlie’s heart kicked up a notch. Straightening, she leaned back against him, felt his lips on her neck, his breath ragged at her ear. His hands smoothed down her belly before his arms wrapped around her waist and his strokes slowed. “Catherine,” he called, the sound rumbling through her veins. “There’s something you should know,” he whispered. “This isn’t just sex, baby, not to me. If that scares you, it’s okay.” Resting her head on his shoulder, Charlie sighed. “If it’s not sex, what is it?” He chuffed, his fingers sliding down her belly, between her thighs and finding her clit. “We’re making love, Catherine.” His fingers worked until she arched her back and gave in to the orgasm needing to break loose. Holding onto him, she felt her body shudder before the contractions in her womb forced her eyes shut and her mouth open in a moan of pleasure. As the aftershocks rocked through her, he carried her to the bed and set them both down. Still in his arms, she wriggled until she could see his eyes, caress his face and nibble his lips. Slowly she undressed him until they were both naked, their bodies pressed against each other; skin on skin, just the way he liked it. “It worries you that you can’t stop thinking about me, doesn’t it?” Charlie nodded. “When I left Roger, I vowed I would never live under the rule of a man again. I promised myself I wouldn’t feel needy, that I could be my own woman.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser He smiled gently, his hand cupping her chin and lifting her face to his. “You are your own woman; that’s one of the things I like about you.” “So you don’t think badly of me because I was stupid enough to stay with him for two years? That I wasn’t strong enough to leave him?” “No,” he said firmly, his gaze steady but safe. “Not at all. You’ve come a long way toward regaining your strength. I admire that.” “Thank you.” Nik frowned. He stared at her, his eyes searching hers though she didn’t know what he was looking for. “You don’t trust yourself, do you?” “What do you mean?” “You don’t trust your own judgment. You’re afraid you’ll make the same mistake; that the next guy who comes along will be another controlling bastard. I’m right, yes?” Charlie’s heart stuttered for a moment. How could he read her so well when she could hardly decipher his expression? “Cat?” “Yes, you’re right, but do you blame me? Two disastrous relationships, one right after the other. Not exactly a great track record, is it?” He smiled wryly. “At least you don’t have women claiming they’ve slept with you when they haven’t.” “No,” she smiled, glad for a lighter mood. “I don’t have any women claiming they’ve slept with me.” “Very funny,” he chuckled. “But seriously, I know you’ve had some disasters in the past, but don’t let that influence your future. Yes, be careful with men, but don’t shut us out altogether. We’re not all the same you know.” “Point taken, Nik.” He smiled, looking satisfied. But she wasn’t done yet. “You said you knew complicated,” she continued. “Would you explain that to me?” Where she expected his smile to falter, it stayed strong. “Honey, complicated should have been my middle name. Complicated is when the doctor tells you to give up the one thing you’re waking up for every morning or you’ll never get a hard on again.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Blinking, Charlie felt her mouth drop open. “That’s right, I had to make a choice. Booze or sex. I couldn’t have both; my body just couldn’t take it. Needless to say, the choice was a no-brainer.” She smiled. “I’m glad.” Pressing his palm to her cheek, his expression turned serious. “Complicated is when your best mate snorts one line of coke too many. He died in an alleyway, his body covered in rats, half submerged in a dirty puddle. I’m telling you, I understand complicated, Catherine.” “I’m sorry, Nik. That must have been awful for you.” He nodded. “Gut wrenching. Bobby and I grew up together. We were like brothers.” “Like Rachel and me,” she whispered. The pain in his eyes cut deep and she got a glimpse of it by imagining Rachel in Bobby’s shoes. “That’s right.” he nodded, smoothing his hand down her arm to her hand, where he twined his fingers with hers. “And complicated is—” “Shh. You’ve convinced me,” Charlie said, silencing him with a tender kiss. Nik sighed. “I’m learning real fast to appreciate what I’ve got while I’ve still got it.” ~ As the sun rose, Nik couldn’t help but watch the light encroach on her sleeping form. Lord but it was hard to keep his hands off her. Although they’d only made love the one time during the night, they’d talked for a long time before she fell asleep. He knew now that her father’s walking out had impacted on her so greatly she lumped all men into the same mould he’d come from. Understood it was her father who’d awakened her desire to play the drums, her love of music, and that his leaving had since confused her. He realised she played originally out of hate, trying to prove her father was wrong for leaving because she possessed so much talent. That had changed, he knew. Seeing her in concert, in full flight surrounded by her best friends and her adoring fans, he could see she now played out of love. Love for her music, for her fans, for her friends, and for herself. It left him angry how one woman could have endured so much heartache at the hands of the men in her life. First, her sorry excuse for a father who set her up to forgive the
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser cheater and then keep him around. And then there was the bastard who thought he could beat her sassiness right out of her. Whoever the hell Roger was, Nik hoped they’d never meet. He’d been honest when he’d said he didn’t pity her because he felt consumed by the need to protect her. Rage simmered, directed at the men who hurt her, but for Catherine, he only felt warmth and kindness and the overriding need to be a gentleman. A smile spread across his face at that thought. He’d been a bad boy for so long he wondered if he still knew how to be a gentleman. But he’d be damned sure he would do nothing to reinforce her experiences. He might be a bad boy, but he could show her he could be a good man. At the door, he heard a soft knock and stood to collect the daily papers he’d ordered earlier. The bellboy eyed him curiously as Nik paid generously for the boy’s silence. Closing the door, Nik was sure he’d succeeded, but when he unfurled the rolled up papers and flipped through the pages, his eyes pulled wide in shock. He groaned, glancing up from the sensational page six to Catherine to make sure she was still asleep. How would he explain this? He stared again at the colour photograph of the two of them, their eyes locked in a heated gaze across the top of the limousine. There was no mistaking the desire in his eyes, or the look of want in hers. As for the kiss he blew across to her, well, he was sure that was obvious. In the strangest thought, he had to hand it to the photographer. It was a damn good shot to snap. How long had they looked at each other like that? Two seconds? And there it was, splashed across the page for all the world to see. Slumping into the chair, Nik ran a hand over his stubbled chin. Catherine was going to flip her lid when she saw the page. After all, they weren’t exactly a public item and he suspected she never wanted go public at all. He braced himself for her fury, sensing her stir over on the bed. Looking up, he found her turned toward him, her eyes still closed, her face calm. How could anyone want to disturb such a peaceful slumber? And yet, he didn’t just have to disturb it, he had to completely destroy the serenity with this photo. Curious, he quickly glanced through the other papers though the only related article was about his haircut. It was only the one paper, though that was probably one too many. Deciding it was easier to get it over with now, Nik stood and walked over to the bed. There, he lay down beside her. Caressing her face with his fingertips, he gently brought her out of her sleep. When her eyes opened, she smiled up at him. “Good morning,” he smiled. “Sleep well?” Nodding, she reached her arms around his neck and pulled him to her. “Very well, thank you.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Sliding his arms under the blankets and around her waist, he brought her naked body against his, wishing like crazy he was still naked so he could feel every one of her delicious curves against him. Holding her for a few more moments, he debated the merits of telling her but then realised she’d find out sooner or later. As much as it hurt, he wanted to be the one to show and tell her they’d been out-ed. “Cat, I’ve got some bad news,” he pulled back though she didn’t look too worried, yet. “You remember last night, at the airport?” She nodded. “The not so unfamiliar face in the crowd, you mean?” He chuffed. “Yeah, that’s me all right. Well, unfortunately, I was spotted. Actually, we were spotted.” She frowned and then sighed. “You’d better show me.” Throwing off the covers, she revealed her gorgeous body and then took one look at him and grabbed the sheet. Securing it around her like a toga, she grinned at him. “Just so you don’t get any ideas.” Nik laughed. “Baby, your clothes don’t stop me. What makes you think that will?” Shrugging, she followed him over to the small dining table. He exposed the paper and quickly looked to her face to gauge her reaction. To his surprise, she remained relatively calm. Apart from the dilation of her pupils and the flare of her nostrils, she hardly reacted. “We’ve been exposed,” she said softly, reaching for his hand. “Damn good photo.” He smiled and pulled her to him. “Tell me what you’re thinking.” Turning her face to his, she reached up and raked her fingers through his shortened hair. “I’m thinking of the very moment when I explain this to the others. Rachel isn’t a problem, she already knows. I mean the band. After all, they pretty much think you’re the devil.” He chuckled. “The devil? And where would they get an idea like that?” As he expected, her cheeks coloured and her eyes twinkled. “I couldn’t say,” she covered well. “But I still think they’re going to grill me big time.” “So you’re not freaked out by this?” She pulled a face. “A little. But only because I wanted you all to myself for a little while longer.” Nik felt his heart give a squeeze. “So what’s our next move?”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Taking a step backward, she shrugged, effectively dislodging the toga and exposing herself to him. “We’ll worry about that later. Right now, I think we need to consummate our ‘out-ing’. What do you say?” Chapter 9 At eleven thirty, Charlie met the others in the hotel restaurant. Either they hadn’t seen the morning papers, or they were doing a great job of covering their reactions. She couldn’t tell which, but knew she needed to get this over with before her courage gave out. “I have a confession to make,” she started. Under the table, she held the newspaper in her hands. Gingerly, she brought it out and laid it in the centre of the table for all to see. “I’ve been seeing Nicholas St. Eve.” Dede yawned. “We know, darling.” Charlie frowned. “You’re not mad?” A quick glance at each of them revealed smiles of delight rather than frowns of betrayal, leaving Charlie mystified. Either Rachel had warned them, or she had done a dismal job of containing her secret. Sadly, she suspected the latter explanation. “No way,” Dede grinned. “He’s gorgeous and naughty and who wouldn’t want to jump Nik’s bones? Besides, you two look damn hot together.” Charlie glanced over at Nancy, the member of their group least likely to approve. “It’s your life, young lady,” Nancy said firmly. “Do whatever you want.” Nancy smiled then. “You know we’ll be here for you.” Feeling her cheeks grow warm, Charlie smiled at each of the women in turn, thanking them for their unwavering and unconditional support. How or why she’d doubted them she didn’t know. She realised just how lucky she was to have these women, along with Rachel, who hadn’t yet surfaced, by her side. Hindsight told her she should have put more faith in them, told them right from the beginning about her and Nik. She couldn’t go back and change history but she sure as heck would learn from it. “Thanks. You guys are the greatest. What would I do without you?” “You’d go nuts,” Dede laughed. She wasn’t the kind to mince her words, a trait Charlie was thankful for. “But since we’ve cleared the air about Nik, let’s talk about these songs you’ve written. What do you say, girls?”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Heads nodded in agreement and Charlie sensed she was about to be ambushed. Her pulse spiked while the hairs on the nape of her neck stood in anticipation. Whatever they were going to say, they’d conspired together to present a united front. That could be good. Or it could be very, very bad. Unexpectedly, Charlie felt her stomach tighten as a quiver snaked down her spine. While she normally didn’t mind sharing her work with the band, this time was different. She couldn’t deny the source of inspiration for her writing and if the songs turned out to be duds…well, she didn’t want to think about that. It wasn’t enough she liked them; the others had to like them as well. Without their approval and passion, there was no way they’d sell them to their fans. What kind of fan would believe in a song when even the band couldn’t get excited about it? Not the kind of fan Mystique needed. Fisting her hands under the table, Charlie tried to stop her feet from tapping and bouncing. She tried to calm her erratic heartbeat while she examined the unreadable faces surrounding her. It was true; she felt a sense of love in the air but attributed it to the generosity of her friends who wanted to let her down easy. Why was this so hard today? She didn’t really have to ask the question. The answer resided within the man she’d allowed into her heart. If her songs turned out to be useless, then it said far too much about a relationship still fighting its way through the tangled web of false truths she’d held onto for so long. “Tell me already,” she pleaded, unable to withstand the noise in her head any longer. “Don’t leave me hanging!” Chuckles greeted her, followed by smiles of endorsement, and then finally, the words she so desperately wanted to hear. “They’re great, Charlie.” Dede nodded. “Better than great,” Anna added. “They’re downright brilliant. I knew you could write good songs, but these are beyond that. They’re truly inspired.” If only you knew, Charlie thought. Relief rolled through her veins. “Thank you.” Anna shook her head and set her delicate hand on Charlie’s shoulder. The move was so full of support Charlie couldn’t help but smile. “No, thank you.” “There is one more request that I’d like to make. It’s about ‘Bad Days’.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser A curious expression crossed Anna’s normally angelic features. It was a look so odd Charlie had to look twice to make sure she wasn’t seeing things. “What is it, Charlie?” Swallowing the nervous lump in her throat, Charlie tried hard not to predict their reactions. “I’d like to sing it myself.” Silence fell over the table. It was like someone had pressed the pause button as all of the women stared, open-mouthed, wide-eyed and unblinking at the drummer who’d never mentioned she could sing. As it was, Charlie didn’t even know if she had the courage to pull it off in front of their legions of die-hard fans—fans who’d come to know Anna as the voice of Mystique. The last thing she wanted to do was make them look stupid, but she couldn’t quell the desire to sing this one herself. “I know,” she waved a hand, forcing a laugh to lighten the mood. “It’s a dumb idea. Sorry, Anna, singing is your thing. Just thought I’d give it a go.” Anna shook her head though Charlie couldn’t read her expression at all. “Don’t be sorry, honey, you go right ahead and sing it. We’ll back you all the way. And don’t worry one bit about our fan base. They love you already.” Charlie frowned. “Aren’t you even the slightest bit worried I’ll muck this up?” In response to her doubt, Anna only beamed a smile and threw her arms around Charlie’s neck. “Not one little bit,” Anna whispered. “I know you’ll do just fine.” “Say,” Dede piped up. Never one to miss out on all the girlie hugs, she was already on her feet and rounding the table toward Charlie. “Why don’t we give these a try before the show tonight?” she suggested, curling her arms around Charlie’s neck as well. “If all goes well, then we should unveil them at the second show. What do you say?” Everyone looked to Charlie. Being in the spotlight had never felt totally comfortable but she guessed if she was going to set her butt centre stage and belt out a song or two, then she’d better get used to it. Smiling, she nodded her approval of Dede’s idea. After all, they were heading straight to the venue after lunch and once the sound checks were run, they could rehearse the new songs. “Good idea,” Charlie nodded, stretching her neck to find some fresh air. All these hugs were making her feel a little claustrophobic. “Now has anyone seen Rachel?” ~ Things never go according to plan, Charlie thought nervously as she took centre stage. Slipping the guitar strap over her head and slotting her arm through, she hooked one hip up on the bar stool and wriggled her butt until she was steady. They were supposed to be doing this during the second show, but when the girls heard her sing during
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser rehearsal, that plan went out the window along with any cautions she or Rachel might have thrown at them. Instead, Dede and Anna both insisted she do the song during the first show with only one rehearsal under her cap. Needless to say, the nerves dancing along her skin threatened to break out of her control. As for her thumping heart, well, Charlie was just glad she was still young and free of any cardiac problems. The darkness around her was hushed as the audience sensed something very new and very strange about to take place. On one hand, she was mighty glad for the darkness but on the other, she knew the lights would come back on at any given second. And then it was just her and the crowd. Aside from some second guitar work from Dede, Charlie would be alone on stage. Even though Rachel and the others waited in the wings, the thought still made her stomach grumble. She tasted bile at the back of her throat and cursed her pride for even suggesting this idea. How did Nik do this night after night? That was easy, she thought, his ego was intact, along with his confidence. In his opinion, singing was the easy part. Charlie didn’t agree. The nervous energy zinging through her body didn’t agree. Her queasy stomach certainly didn’t agree. But she’d vowed to do this and she refused to let anyone down. She just hoped her voice would hold out and not wobble like jelly in a bowl. Through her earpiece, she heard the count down as everyone prepared to begin. As the voice grew closer to zero, Charlie’s heartbeat thumped in time and when the lights brightened, her bravery was rewarded with a stirring round of applause. She knew she wasn’t a faceless drummer to the fans of Mystique, the emails and letters she received were testament to that. Some of their fans wanted to be like her and live the life of a rock and roll drummer. They wrote letters of praise and admiration, insisting that without her, Mystique wouldn’t be in the top ten so regularly. Other fans told her stories of how her lyrics touched their hearts and felt so true. They were the fans she counted on now, the ones who seemed to truly understand why she wrote the way she wrote. Behind her, Dede counted them in and when Charlie struck the first chord, all her nerves faded away. A remarkable feeling of serenity enveloped her as she led the audience through the intro and finally to the words she’d written in such painstaking truth. There was a time When love blinded me so Allowed his fists to play out a crime Never felt so low I gave up my self-respect for the love of a man
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Tossed away my independence Dropped my guard, swallowed whole by that man For a while, I dropped right out of existence The darkness became my friend Comforted me, nurtured my self-hate Promised me he’d stay until the very end By the time I woke up, it was almost too late Everyone has bad days We find a way to survive I’ve found a thousand ways To remind me that I am alive And then you came into my life Tried to show me that I could trust again That this world isn’t always full of strife That there are still some good men I want to trust you Am willing to have faith and believe Show me this world so new You know if you hurt me, I’ll leave As Dede struck the final chord, Charlie became aware of the silence of the audience. It should have unnerved her but instead, it left her in awe of the power of the song. The lights brightened over the audience to reveal a sea of smiles, even some tears glistening in the front row. Her breath caught in her throat as she tried to soak in the atmosphere but the silence was short lived. Gradually, row-by-row, the crowd stood and the deafening roar of appreciation washed over her. Tears prickled her own eyes and she blinked to shoo them away. Now was definitely not the time for crying. Rather, she detangled herself from the guitar and stood, bowing to the crowd. The action only sent them into a frenzy. Impossibly, the cheering grew louder until she detected the sound of her name being chanted. As she listened, the clapping died down, replaced by her name, shouted over and over. Char-lie, Char-lie. She couldn’t help but grin. The sensations buzzing around inside her ranged from elation to relief to that feeling of being a kid in the toy store for the very first time. Right now, the power she held in her hand was awesome. Far from being frightened, she was overcome with the urge to jump into the audience and engage in a little crowd surfing.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Char-lie, Char-lie. She stayed put, her feet firmly rooted to the very centre of the stage and unable to tear her eyes away from the mass of waving arms and smiles in front of her. Never had she loved this life more. She was thankful she hadn’t given in to her fears and skittered away from this opportunity. From her left, the rest of the band stepped onto stage, ready to resume their usual roles and reminding Charlie they needed to get on with the rest of the show. Feeling as though she floated on a bed of air, she drifted back to her drums. The sound of her name still pierced the air, helping to perpetuate the euphoria racing through her. So this was what Nik meant? Charlie shuddered, the thought that he felt this way every night sending tingles along her skin. Lord but she could get used to the attention, she thought selfishly. Now she understood why Anna glowed contentedly after every show. Picking up her sticks, she glimpsed Rachel at the curtain to her right and turned to see her friend give two thumbs up. Reading those familiar blue eyes, Charlie felt their kinship encircle her, love and warmth filling her heart. Smiling, Charlie counted in the beat to one of their early released songs—still a favourite according to the press— and kicked into the rhythm with renewed vigour. Man she loved this life. ~ His heart thumped so hard in his chest Nik thought he was about to explode. Watching her on stage, singing so intimately to such a large audience left his mouth dry. Not only could the girl sing, but damn could she write. Where had that song come from? It certainly wasn’t on their last album, and he should know. He’d listened to it about a thousand times. She must have written it recently, after being with him. There could simply be no other explanation for it, he decided. That wasn’t his ego talking, he knew. Rather it was an intangible sense he felt every time he was around her. He wasn’t about to question it, just in case it ran away. But, boy oh boy, did the woman know how to strike him deep and hard. Those words were meant for him. Overwhelmed by the heartfelt expression in them, he tried not to remain standing when everyone else around him took their seats again. And he tried desperately not to stand there like a lovesick fool. They might have been out-ed, but as yet, neither had made a public announcement confirming or denying the reports. He didn’t want to be the one to let the cat out of the bag, that was for sure. Now, more than ever, he wanted to go to her. Such a pity they were only half way through the concert, he thought, the desire to show her how much he appreciated the sentiment in the lyrics excruciatingly strong. At least he was surrounded by body guards, not dressed in the customary black attire but in everyday, ‘normal’ clothing. Casey sat right behind him, equally blocked in by men who could just as easily play
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser quarterback for the local NFL team. Nik was assured some semblance of privacy, despite the driving urge to stand up and declare that woman to be his. That would definitely land him in hot water. The last thing he wanted to do was chase her away with possessive outbursts that left absolutely nothing to the imagination of anyone wanting to take a peek behind closed doors. If there was one thing he knew, it was that they were surrounded by ordinary everyday people living vicariously through the antics of their favourite rock stars. He didn’t blame them, or resent them. Without them, his job as a singer and songwriter was pointless. At the same time, he liked the parts of his life no one else knew about. The details he’d chosen to keep to himself. And, Catherine Brown was one such detail, at least for now. From behind, Casey tapped him on the shoulder. Turning, Nik grinned up at his mate. “She’s brilliant, Nik.” Casey nodded. Nik could only agree. “You bet.” “See? Told you we shouldn’t have let her get away.” Nik waved his friend’s gloating behaviour away. Yeah, Casey was right. Despite raging hormones and a hard-on to make him crazy, Nik could admit he should have hired her on the spot. He should never have let lust get in the way. Then again, he thought as he turned back toward the stage, if he had hired her, they would never have played out this frustrating, enticing, titillating mating dance. And he would probably have never made love to her. That was the one thing he realised he needed. Being just friends with Catherine would never have been enough. Of course, now that he’d had her, he wasn’t sure he could stop. Down on the brightly lit stage, he watched as she slipped effortlessly back into her supporting role of drummer. He knew better than most, and understood the drummer was a key ingredient to any band. One who possessed the talents of Catherine certainly shined brightly in the fantastic, entertaining and well deserving group of women. Even as Mystique topped the charts while Tantaliser gradually dropped down them, he never once resented her prosperity. If anything, he was glad as hell she was out there showing him how to do it, delighted she had received her just rewards. In the morning, the tabloids would be lauding her as brilliance personified. Every reporter worth his salt would be clambering for an exclusive interview. She would be the talk of the town, as he had been when he’d released his latest material. The more he thought about it, the more he realised they were a crazy pair. But her release tonight wasn’t about trumping him. There was no power play here, although there may have been to begin with.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser No, Nik smiled, this was more fundamental. It was less of a publicity stunt, and more of a personal connection she couldn’t, or wouldn’t, ignore. He liked that and he would tell her later tonight. Again Casey tapped him on the shoulder, as Mystique’s lead singer, Anna, broke into a rendition of a classic. Nik turned, not interested in Anna. “What’s up?” Casey winked. “Ask her tonight.” Nik grinned. He’d run the idea of her appearing at their show by Casey earlier. Initially, Casey had been a little wary, but now, he was clearly besotted. “I will.” Casey shook his head. “No, stupid. I mean ask her. Don’t tell her. Don’t insist. Don’t demand. Just ask. Can you do that?” Nik blinked, momentarily floored by Casey’s instructions. Although he understood her history with her abusive ex and the fact she despised being ordered around, he hadn’t always been ready to make a request of her. He remembered ordering her to take her clothes off, to touch him and taste him. She hadn’t balked then and he supposed that had more to do with trust than anything. But, considering Casey’s words, he realised he couldn’t just waltz up to her and order her to sing with him or for him at Tantaliser’s next show. And if Casey knew it, then Nik had better watch his mouth. “I can do that,” he said firmly, calmly and without sounding offended. “I will do that.” Casey smiled, approving of Nik’s response. With that settled, Nik turned back to watch the rest of the show, his eyes glued to only one of the women on stage. The smile she wore was so satisfied and blissful he could only mirror it from up here in the rafters. Lord but she glowed when she was happy. He didn’t mean sexed-up happy, he meant joyed by the events in her life, the achievements she could proudly call her own, and the journey taking her around the world and into so many hearts and lives. For one brief second, Nik felt it too and realised he wanted to give that to her any way he could, for as long as she’d let him. The thought jolted him. He hadn’t wanted forever or white picket fences. And he sure as hell didn’t want a labradoodle. But he wanted Catherine the same way he’d wanted Penny and he knew, right then in that moment, and he was in very big trouble. Not the kind of man to go without the things he wanted, he understood she wasn’t a possession. After her experiences, and her declaration she didn’t want forever, he knew she wasn’t for sale. Treating her that way would only unleash a fury bound tightly in a deep dark corner, primarily reserved for Roger but blind and indiscriminate regardless of any man who tried to control her. She couldn’t know how deeply he wanted her in his life. Either she’d feel obliged, or he’d end up with a broken heart. Whatever happened, he had to make their time
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser together memorable until she tired of him and finally left. Although he couldn’t know how long it would last, he knew he had to make the most of his time with her while he had her. With that thought, he secured his baseball cap tightly on his head and stood. Instantly a wall of bodies rose around him and without another word, he left the stadium. ~ Despite the pleas from the others for her to stay and celebrate with them, Charlie bid them good night and rode the elevator to her floor alone. The adrenaline still flowed through her veins from her performance and she wanted to enjoy it. If she could make it last all night, then she’d be one happy girl in the morning. It had crossed her mind to call Nik, but when she saw the late hour and remembered he had a show to perform, she couldn’t bring herself to disturb his sleep. At her door, she swiped the card key through the lock, waited for the little light to turn green and then pushed the door open. The sight that greeted her took her breath away. She had to blink several times to make sure she wasn’t hallucinating. Checking the number on the door, she established she was at the right room before stepping into the darkened space. The first thing to catch her attention was the dozens of candles that burned in the room. They were everywhere, lighting the room in a soft amber glow. Next, she noticed the rose petals, scattered over the king sized bed. Finally, she took a deep breath of the lovely fragrant air, heavily scented with rose. Closing the door behind her and leaning against it, she wondered where he was because there were no two ways about it; this was Nik’s doing. He emerged from the en suite, freshly showered and wearing only a towel around his hips. He clenched a single, long stemmed rose between his teeth. The twinkle in his eyes suggested he was up to no good, but she knew that already. When he crossed the floor and took her in his arms, she wondered what else he had in store for her. Unable to quash the smile on her face, she let him lead her around the room in a waltz until he swished his head to the side and dropped the red rose on the corner of the bed. “You were amazing tonight,” he breathed, leaning forward and resting his forehead against hers. “Everyone will be talking about you tomorrow.” She smiled, circling her arms around his lean waist, silently grateful for the skin to skin contact. “You mean today. But yes, they already are.” “I’m impressed, babe,” he nodded gently. “Really, I am. Your talent astounds me. Is there no end to it?”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser His gushing caused her cheeks to grow warm. “Nik, stop it. You don’t have to woo me with kind words.” He turned serious, his palms pressing at each of her cheeks, his eyes earnest. “I’m not trying to charm you into bed, lady. I’m trying to express how I’m feeling.” Charlie swallowed, suddenly lost for words. “There’s something I’d like to ask of you.” She nodded, unable to speak. He took a deep breath, the exhale stuttering ever so slightly and causing a niggle of worry to emerge. Nik was never nervous. What was so important that he had to take deep breaths and calm himself down? “I would really like it if you appeared at my show tonight, as my special guest. It would mean the world to me if you’d sing a duet with me. But I’m asking babe, I’m not insisting. It’s completely up to you.” Charlie blinked, stunned by his request. “Nik, I…” “Hush,” he whispered, dragging his lips over hers in a kiss that set her belly quivering. “I don’t want an answer now. Think about it.” “And in the meantime?” He smiled, wicked and promising. “I think we can find something to do.” Thankful that she wasn’t being pressured into an answer, she grinned and tugged at the corner of the towel, dislodging it and baring his God-like body. She let her eyes drift over his bronzed skin, the candlelight flickering over his butt ever so enticingly. “Oh yeah,” she hummed. “I’m sure we can find something to do.” Chapter 10 Central Park was the biggest urban park she’d ever seen. While joggers passed by her without so much as eye contact, and cyclists whizzed by her so close she could feel the wind rush by, she marvelled at its size and brilliance. The closest places she could relate it to were the Botanical Gardens in Sydney and Melbourne. But even they paled in comparison of size. Central Park was, in Charlie’s mother’s words, humungous.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Yet despite its size and the hordes of people moving about, she felt completely alone. No one paid her any attention, presuming she was just another New Yorker out for a mid-morning stroll. Of course, the red wig helped, and Charlie suspected that if she yanked it off and revealed her true identity, then she’d succeed in garnering their attention. Provided she actually wanted their attention. Which she didn’t. In fact, she was grateful for the solitude, needing time and space to put Nik into perspective. His request left her speechless. Partly because he wanted her at his show. Mostly because he’d asked. Nik rarely asked anything. Demanded was a better word, along with insisted and commanded and ordered. Until now, none of those things truly bothered her because even though he had commanded her actions on occasion, there was a mutual respect and appreciation. He’d never ordered her to do something she found to be vulgar or offensive or nasty and if she was honest, she didn’t think he would. That wasn’t Nik’s style. Then he went and did something like make this request. How could she possibly say no when he behaved in such a gentlemanly way? Grrr, she thought, disturbed that he’d not only listened to the gory details about Roger, but that he’d modified his behaviour so as not to repeat Roger’s mistakes. What the hell was that about? She wondered, unable to stop herself from suspecting the worst. He’d never given her reason to think badly of him, just the opposite in fact, and in her experience, that didn’t always put Charlie in the best position. She’d believed Gavin when he said he wouldn’t cheat on her again. He’d not only proven her wrong once, but thrice. And she’d believed Roger when he promised he wouldn’t hit her again. Not only had that backfired on her, but it had left her bruised and battered as a result. She tried to reason with her primal instincts, reminded them Rachel endorsed Nik, and that he gave her no evidence to convict him of anything untoward. It was true, he’d done nothing but treat her with respect and dignity and affection. She couldn’t fault him there. In some of their most intimate moments, he’d almost revered her, treated her like a queen. But in the end, and after one exhausting lap of the park, she couldn’t shake the uneasy feeling in her belly. Perhaps it was as simple as knowing he wasn’t the bad boy rocker she had once thought, and deep down Nicholas St. Eve was just a sweet man wanting nothing more than to please her. The last thing she needed was for things to become more complicated, but she didn’t know how to uncover the truth. It wasn’t like Nik would’ve consulted the rest of the band before asking her to join them, was it? He was, after all, the lead singer and founder of Tantaliser, maintaining complete creative control and answering to no one. Except for that one time when, at her audition, he’d bowed to Casey’s authority. Charlie stopped walking. Casey. He’d been supportive of her at the audition, had convinced Nik to let her at least play. Would he know what was going on in Nik’s head? There was only one way to find out, and so stuffing her hands in her pockets, Charlie put her head down and scurried back to her hotel. Riding the elevator, she fidgeted nervously with the zipper on her jacket. In the hallway, she barrelled straight past her
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser own room before stopping at Rachel’s door. Thumping on it with her fist, she shouted impatiently until Rachel finally peeked through. “Charlie? What is it?” Rachel had that just-out-of-bed look, a look Charlie understood. Leaning close, she whispered to her friend, “Is Casey here? I need to talk to him.” Rachel’s eyes widened momentarily before she nodded and opened the door further for Charlie to step in. Seeing Casey reclining in the large bed, the blankets pulled up to his waist and his top half naked, Charlie suddenly felt a pang of guilt. Hoping like crazy she hadn’t interrupted them, she strode up the foot of the bed and stared Casey in the eye. He’d always been straight with her and she expected nothing less now. “Nik asked me to come to the show tonight.” Casey nodded, a huge grin spreading on his lips. “You mean he actually asked?” Charlie set her fists on her hips. “This is no time for games. Is he being straight up with me? Or is there something I should know?” Frowning, Casey threw a glance at Rachel and then sat up straight. “I don’t understand, Charlie. What’s the problem here?” “Nik wants me at the show? To sing?” She couldn’t stop the incredulity in her voice even if she wanted to. Casey nodded slowly, clearly not understanding her point. “There’s no ulterior motive here? He’s not manipulating me or using me?” “He wouldn’t, or I’d kill him long before you got a chance,” Casey explained. “We discussed the idea and think it would great to have you and the rest of your band there tonight. He was there you know, last night.” Charlie nodded. “I know. He said lots of nice things about my singing.” “Well, I second whatever he said. You were bloody fantastic. Why do you think you have a write-up in just about every paper?” He pointed over to the small breakfast table. Glancing over, Charlie saw the pile of newspapers, a photo of her in concert last night gracing one of the pages staring back at her. She also saw the pair of scissors and knew Rachel would be cutting out those articles. Warmth spread through her, chasing away some of the cold left behind by her suspicions of Nik. Her eyes drifted across to Rachel.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “Casey told me about it,” she said, her eyes warm and encouraging. “If you’re asking for my permission, you’ve got it. It’s up to you whether you want to go alone or take the girls with you. But I think it’s a great idea.” “But we’re rival bands. We’re supposed to be competing.” Casey chuckled. “So many artists are teaming up these days it’s hard to keep track of who’s in what band, Charlie. The bottom line is that this could be a mega opportunity for both of us. Tantaliser and Mystique are headline acts right now. It wouldn’t be like one welching off the other. It would be a meeting of equal talents. Granted,” he shrugged, a sheepish look creeping over his expression. “Nik really just wants you to sing with him. But he won’t be opposed if you brought everyone with you. Hell,” he laughed. “It’d be like one big jam session.” “And what if I said no?” “We’d all be disappointed,” he said earnestly. “And I’m not saying that to make you feel guilty. I’m saying that because it’s how the whole band would feel, Charlie.” She couldn’t help herself. She had to ask. “And Nik?” Casey sighed, the pained expression on his face telling her he wasn’t sure what to say or how much to reveal. He had a confidence to keep and just as she knew Rachel wouldn’t betray her, Casey wouldn’t betray Nik. Deciding not to put pressure on him, she held up her hand to stop him. “Don’t answer that. I’m sorry I asked. You’re his mate and I don’t expect you to tell me. I just had to know if he was being serious.” “I guarantee it,” Casey nodded. “He admires you as an artist, adores your talent. As for you,” Casey smiled. “I’ve never seen him like this. You’ve done something to him, something mighty fine.” “I’m telling you,” Rachel said softly, her hand rubbing soothing circles over Charlie’s shoulder. “He’s not like Roger.” Sighing, frustrated with her inability to believe her friend, Charlie shook her head sadly. “I want to believe that. Really, I do. But something’s holding me back.” “There are a lot of rumours out there about Nik,” Casey interjected. “And there are a lot out there about you. Do you believe all of them?” He was right. Of the rumours circulating about her, the only one that was remotely true was that she was born in Australia. And she didn’t let them perturb her. So why was she letting the rumours about Nik get to her?
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser No wiser than when she’d walked in the room, Charlie threw her hands in the air and shrugged. “So then let me ask you something, Casey.” “Go right ahead.” Charlie swallowed, doubting herself. “Has Nik ever been with a groupie?” “No.” He shook his head, his face calm and relaxed. “I probably shouldn’t say anything, but Nik hasn’t been with a woman in a long time, Charlie. You’ve done something wonderful to him and you should trust it.” “I don’t know what to believe anymore. I’m so damned scared of making another colossal mistake that I’m not even willing to try anymore.” Casey frowned. “Even if it means missing out on the love of a good man?” Charlie gasped. “Love?” Instantly backtracking, Casey tried to talk his way out of it but he’d said too much. Nothing could erase his admission that he thought Nik might be in love her. She didn’t know how one word could instil so much fear in her heart, but it did and without another word, she turned and ran for the door. Rachel caught up with her, grabbing her hand and forcing Charlie to turn around. The expression on her face was stern, unlike one Charlie had ever seen before. As for the words that came out of her friend’s mouth, well, Charlie had no answer to them. “You know I love you, Cat, and I want to see you happy. Nik makes you happy, doesn’t he? Since you’ve been with him, you haven’t had any more headaches. Since you’ve been with him, you’ve come alive and damn it, it looks good on you. Don’t let Roger or Gavin or your father screw it up this time. Take the leap of faith because if you don’t, you will regret it.” ~ Nik paced the floor impatiently. One, two, three turn. One, two, three turn. The small dressing room didn’t exactly allow him to work off the nervous energy as he waited for her answer. Although he’d given her as much time as he could, he hadn’t expected her to take this long. Glancing anxiously at his watch, he huffed softly. Twenty minutes until the curtain went up and she was nowhere to be found. With the impatience came the inability to think clearly. No news was good news, right? Or was it the other way around? Damn, he hated this. When he woke mid-morning, her arms wrapped around him possessively, protectively, he’d hoped she’d say yes at breakfast. No such luck. Rather, she’d eaten quietly, her gaze barely meeting his, her mood pensive at best. She’d showered alone, politely
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser declining his suggestion he join her. And when she’d dressed, she’d set a quick kiss on his cheek and left him alone in her room. He did look for her, even asking Rachel where she would have gone but that was pointless as Rachel only stared at him accusingly, innocently inquiring if they’d had a fight or something. It was something, all right. Stupid Nicholas St. Eve, he thought savagely as he whirled around, his satin robe billowing out behind him. Big bad rocker that he was, he sometimes had no idea when it came to women. He’d pushed her too hard, too far this time. He’d scared her. His second mistake had come in the form of a generous invitation to take as long as she needed. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Had he misread the signs? Did she only want a private affair with no strings and no more complications? An affair that didn’t take them out into the public eye? Did his request serve as a reminder that they were actually two bands competing for a similar audience? He understood they led an all too public life and her appearing at his show could confirm those rumours circulating about them. But then if she didn’t want to confirm them, why hadn’t she publicly declared there was nothing between them? Confused, he stopped in the centre of the small room and silently prayed for some guidance when it came to Catherine Brown. She had him all twisted up. He didn’t know what to do, and Nik always knew what to do. Until now, he’d known how to weave in between a woman’s tangled web of fears and worries. Flowers, chocolates, private dinners at expensive restaurants, the works. He usually knew what the hell to do. Catherine wasn’t like any woman he’d ever known and as much as he understood her previous experiences with the disgusting Roger, he didn’t understand how it could keep fortifying those walls she’d built around her. He thought he’d broken through them when she barely reacted to their ‘out-ing’ as a couple. Or when he’d met her in her room last night, staring into her eyes when he made love to her. He could have sworn he felt something shift between them, making it easier to communicate. Either she liked her life to be complicated, or she didn’t know how to stop things being so complicated. With everything he was worth, Nik wished for the latter. The knock at the door made him jump. Hurriedly, he pulled the door open and then sighed despondently when he saw only Casey. “Hi to you too, grumble bum,” Casey growled, stepping into the small room and making it feel altogether claustrophobic. “What’s up?” Smiling, Casey motioned for him to shut the door. Nik’s heart gave a jump at the thought she was here somewhere. “You sure know how to stir up a hornet’s nest, don’t you?”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Nik baulked. “What are you talking about?” Casey’s eyes widened in mock shock. “Oh, so you know nothing about the flock of reporters out there? Or the fans in the front rows holding up signs with ‘Nik and Charlie sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G’?” Shaking his head, Nik’s mind whirled. “Nothing. I swear.” “It’s like the crowd is expecting her to show up. Who the hell did you tell?” Holding his palms up in surrender, Nik put on an honest expression. “No one. I asked her and I’m still waiting for a bloody reply, you imbecile.” Casey wouldn’t let up. “What are you going to do if she doesn’t show? Declare that you love her?” Nik’s eyes boggled. “Love? What the hell are you on about, boy? I’ve said nothing of the sort.” “Really?” Casey didn’t sound convinced. “Really. Perhaps you should be asking her these questions.” Shaking his head, Casey stepped forward and patted Nik’s shoulder. “Maybe you can ask them yourself. She’s waiting outside.” For a second, Nik’s heart stopped beating. She was here? Did that mean she was going to accept his invitation to join him on stage? God he hoped so, because he didn’t know how he’d do the show if she said no. “I’ll send her in.” Casey’s words brought his mind back to the present and he watched, as if trapped in a suspense movie, as Casey opened the door. Expecting to see her, he couldn’t stem the disappointment that flowed through him when she wasn’t standing in the doorway. He wanted her to be waiting at his door, full of energy and joy and impatient to get the show started. She wasn’t there, and it should give him a clear message. She was going to say no and it left him feeling like a horny teenager who’d just received his first rejection. After what felt like hours, she appeared in the doorway, undeniably subdued and mellow. Yeah, he thought sourly, he was about to get the biggest rejection of his life. Disappointment mixed with regret. Why couldn’t she see they were so good together? He could see it, feel it and just about touch it. Like he wanted to touch her, rev her up, and get her out of her muted demeanour.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser But when she stepped into the room and closed the door, all he felt was an overwhelming desire to hold her. Where he should’ve been angry at her for leaving him hanging for so long, he felt compassion flow through his veins instead. He didn’t miss the worry in her eyes, or the way she held her body so rigid. He felt responsible. When he reached out to her, she took a hold of his hand and pressed it to her chest over her heart. The organ thundered against his hand. “Please talk to me,” he pleaded, his other hand caressing her cheek. “What are you thinking?” “That I owe you an apology.” Oh God, he thought, she’s going to end it all together. He shook his head. “No, no, you don’t owe me anything.” She stepped closer, her body only inches from his. “I’m sorry I doubted you, Nik.” Curious, he tilted his head to the side. “Pardon?” She stepped closer, her body flattening against his. Now he felt her heart beat against his chest, her breasts hard against him, her heat seeping into his veins. Dare he hope? “This morning, I went for a walk to clear my head. The way you acted last night left me confused. You never ask, Nik, you just demand,” she smiled. “That’s not a bad thing, but when you changed tack and asked me,” her smile faded as she shook her head. “It meant that you’d really listened to the things I said about Roger and the way he treated me. That scared me.” “Why?” She took a deep breath. The exhaled air washed over him, hot and heavy. “Because I thought you were doing what you thought I wanted. I was worried you were trying to manipulate me.” When she blinked, her eyes moistened. “Never,” he whispered, his throat tight with the thought he could leave her so scared and afraid. “Never, babe,” he took her face in his hands. “I’m so sorry. I just thought I’d freak you out if I demanded you come and sing tonight.” She nodded. “I understand that now. That’s why I’m here. I wouldn’t miss this for the world, Nik.” “I was listening when you told me about Roger,” he said, wrapping his arms around her shoulders and pulling her tight against him. “I care about you too much to treat you like that.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser When she pulled her head back and tilted her face to his, Nik felt his insides clench. Suddenly, Casey’s mention of the word love smacked him hard in the face. He knew what love felt like, had been in love before, and what he felt for Catherine felt different but just as strong. Fierce. All-consuming. A wave of want washed over him. Not the kind of want to take her to bed right this instant—although that desire was strong, too. But it was the kind of want to go to bed with her every night, wake up to her gorgeous fudge brown eyes every morning and, damn it, it was the kind of want that echoed with the pitter-patter of tiny feet. Blinking, he focused his gaze on those eyes and squeezed her tighter. “Yes, Catherine Brown, I care about you. A lot. I like what we’ve got going here and I don’t want to mess it up.” “Nik,” she breathed, her eyes searching his. “What are you saying?” He smiled, dipped his head and brushed his lips against hers. Like a match to dry tinder, a fire erupted between them that saw his light kiss turn into a surging torrent of emotion. He licked her lips eagerly before sliding his tongue between them into her moist heat. She moaned under the kiss, the sound the same as the ones that slipped between her lips during their lovemaking. Her hands flattened against his chest, her fingertips plucking at his nipples as he speared his hands into her hair and held her head. Saying her name over and over, he trailed wet kisses down the side of her neck. This woman obliterated everything in his mind but he couldn’t make love to her here. The show would start soon and he needed a clear head before he went out there. But oh, the woman knew how to touch him, how to make his skin sizzle with desire. Her scent filled every breath he took, her taste as much a part of him as was his own. For the briefest of moments, he tore his lips away and reared back. But one look at her flushed skin, the molten need in her eyes, those glistening lips and he dove right back in. Backing her up to the door, he pressed them against it. It took only the slightest encouragement for her to part her legs so he could step between them. Sliding a hand between her thighs, he rubbed her through the fabric of her pants. Her body shuddered, her lips on his ear hot and demanding. Almost unable to contain himself, he worked to bring her to the edge of orgasm and just before she could fall over it, he paused. Staring into her eyes, his breathing hard and fast, he found the edge of her pants and pushed his hand down between her thighs. He needed to feel her muscles squeeze tight around him, just as they would later tonight after the show. Most of all, he wanted to pleasure her.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser As he expected, she was slick and swollen, her breath catching in her throat as he touched her intimately. Circling her clit, he felt her body begin to vibrate against his and knew she was close. He slid his fingers closer to her opening, his eyes meeting hers until she nodded, giving him the permission he sought. Entering her, he used his other arm to hold her body close while she gave in to the orgasm. Lord but she was beautiful to watch, her eyes most of all as she slowly came down from the high. “Nik,” she breathed again, trying to return her breathing to normal. He shook his head. “Hush.” Kissing her, he straightened her clothing. “We’ll talk about it after the show.” ~ Charlie stared up at the ceiling, the silence around her much appreciated as the roar and exhilaration of the show slowly dissipated. With dawn fast approaching, she wondered if sleep would ever claim her. The night had whizzed by in such a blur she silently wished she could go back and really take it all in. After leaving Nik’s dressing room, she’d watched from the stage wings while he dazzled the audience with his witty repartee and honest singing. She remembered thinking him a true showman, revelling as much in the audience’s responses as they did his skilled guitar playing. He treated them like a gathering of fifty or so, rather than the thousands that had packed the stadium, and they loved every minute of it. Before leaping up on stage, she wondered if the shows had been as lively when he and Tantaliser were slipping down the charts. But when he called to her, introducing her and Mystique as his VIP guests, Charlie hadn’t hesitated. Her mind cleared of all thoughts as she followed the others up on stage and took her place beside Nik. For a moment, the crowd stood in silence, staring at the gathering of musicians on stage. But the very minute they started with their ‘jam session’, the crowd went wild. From that time on, Charlie’s memories blurred into snippets of Nik’s smile, Nik’s touch and their unrehearsed but sweetly timed duet. Nothing had mattered, not the media, not the crowd, not even the others on stage. She couldn’t have cared less about the fallout of their surprise but now, as she lay in bed, her arms and legs tangled with Nik’s, she worried. The media could eat them alive, call them sell-outs. Or worse, the whole saga could be boiled down to a love tryst between her and Nik that had swallowed two bands whole. She knew there would be critics, there always were. Until now, she’d learned they were a necessary evil and had paid them only minimal attention. Yet, as dawn approached and the first rays of light peeked through the cracks in the curtains, Charlie felt anxious toward the arrival of the morning papers. There was no doubt about it, she’d had a blast last night. Despite the fuzzy edges of her memories, she would never regret leading her band on this crazy adventure. The
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser adrenaline rush afterwards left the girls completely buzzed. Even old-fashioned Nancy seemed ten years younger as she bounced around backstage. Watching them brought Charlie great delight and not one ounce of guilt when she and Nik snuck away to her room. Their lovemaking had been incredible, tender and hot and delicious all at the same time. Thinking about it now set her heart racing and her womb throbbing. Beside her, Nik mumbled in his sleep. His huff sent waves of warm air across her bare chest, tickling her nipple. She tried to stifle a laugh but the inevitable giggle erupted, waking Nik with a start. “Sorry,” she grinned, only fifty percent guilty she’d woken him. “You tickled.” He blinked sleepily, his eyes bloodshot and tired. “I tickled you?” She nodded but didn’t elaborate. Instead, she stroked her fingers down the side of his face, lulling him back to sleep. The weight of his head resting between her breasts was solid and steady, and she realised how much she liked it. She had to admit, she also liked the feel of his body wrapped around hers, with his flat, hard belly pressed against her softer curves. In so many ways they were very different and yet, there were just as many similarities between them. Almost effortlessly they found a unified rhythm that suited only them, both in bed and out of it. It should have scared her. In fact, not so long ago, it would have had her packing her bags and running as far away as humanly possible. But in getting to know Nik, she was learning about herself too. More and more, she realised she wanted to share her life with a man again. She wanted to experience the joy that came with loving and being loved. That man was Nik, and as comfortable as it was admitting it to herself, she knew she would never admit it to him. After all, he wasn’t after white picket fences, was he? Chapter 11 An hour after lunch, the official media circus began. As much as she hated interviews, she was glad this one wasn’t on camera. While she waited in the hotel lobby, Charlie tried not to notice the surreptitious glances from the hotel staff. When the pointed stares from hotel guests got to be too much, she wanted to leap up from her chair and do something outrageous. Of course she didn’t, but she didn’t exactly ignore them either. When she stared right back at one older woman, she almost laughed at the flustered expression that saw the woman scurry away. She didn’t want to be rude, but she was still so tired, not having slept a single wink all night. Worse still, she’d had to endure Nik’s peaceful slumber because while he softly snored and held her tightly in his arms, she hadn’t been able to close her eyes. Oh, she’d tried. Numerous times. Without success. Frustrating as it was, it had at least given her some time to experience the contented blissfulness in Nik’s embrace without the pressure of
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser having to speak about it. Not that it helped to relieve her heavy eyelids or the yawn desperately yearning to escape her firm jaws now. Scanning the foyer, Charlie wondered where the others were. She wasn’t supposed to be doing this alone, but as yet, no one had joined her. Not even Rachel, which made this all the more difficult. How could Rachel expect her to do this alone? If anyone was going to balls it up, it was Charlie and her raw and honest mouth. In the best of times, when she was fully rested and well fed—she’d skipped breakfast so as not to throw up during the interview—Charlie could be counted on to say at least one dumb thing. Now, with no sleep, no food and an urge to yell at the two young men eyeing her off from across the lobby, she was ripe for exploitation. Lord but she hoped this interviewer was a young, green recruit who had no talent for getting under her skin. As Murphy’s Law went, of course, Charlie groaned at the sight of her interviewer emerging from the hotel’s revolving doors. Fantastic, Charlie thought sarcastically, just brilliant. Who else would turn up other than Maureen Fable, the notoriously controversial and highly provocative top brass from “Worship” magazine? Swallowing a groan, Charlie wondered when the woman had even entered the country. Maureen’s whereabouts were almost front-page news in Sydney, and yet here she was, bright as day, chipper as a frosty spring morning striding purposefully toward Charlie. They’d met once before, when Maureen took over Rachel’s handle on the rock entertainment news. Rachel once told her that at the office, they called Maureen the “smiling assassin” for the way she’d cut your job out from under your feet with one of her famous pristine smiles. For a long time, Maureen had tried to steal Rachel’s job. No doubt, she wanted to be the one to interview the likes of Nik, perhaps even allow the bad boys of rock to seduce her for a juicier scoop. Charlie shuddered at the thought. Not that Maureen was unattractive. By society’s standards, the woman was downright gorgeous, though Charlie was sure she had cosmetic surgery to thank for some of her beauty. At almost six feet tall, slender as a post, with long, honey blonde hair and blue eyes to die for, Maureen Fable could probably hold the front cover all on her own. She certainly didn’t look like someone who’d topped forty, had three kids and a solid marriage about to celebrate its twentieth anniversary. If anything, Maureen gave the impression of a woman who skipped from one young man to the next in search of everlasting youth. “Charlie!” Maureen almost squealed as she dashed forward. To be polite, Charlie extended her hand but the older woman shushed it aside and embraced her emphatically. “Hello, Maureen.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “Oh darling,” Maureen pulled back but held on to Charlie’s shoulders. The woman was definitely not subtle as she looked Charlie over from head to toe. “You look positively radiant.” For an Australian reporter, Maureen made the glam girls of Hollywood seem drab in comparison. Somehow she managed to get invited to all the right parties, schmooze with all the right celebrities and pop into the studios of all the right talk shows. How did she do it? Charlie wondered as Maureen finally let her go. For a moment, without the reporter’s vice-like grip on her shoulders, Charlie felt a little light-headed. It took all of her strength not to fall into the seat she’d just vacated. Rather, she motioned toward a chair opposite for Maureen and while the graceful swan took her seat, Charlie plopped inelegantly on her butt. Thankfully, Maureen didn’t seem to notice. “I don’t know where the others are,” Charlie explained, feeling like an inadequate teenager. “They’re supposed to be here.” Maureen smiled; only Charlie sensed the approach of a shark rather than a fellow Aussie. “Oh honey, didn’t Rachel tell you? I only want to speak to you. The others in your band, nice as they are, don’t interest me one little bit.” The hackles on Charlie’s nape rose. “And what of Rachel? Did you send her away too?” Maureen cocked her head, appearing the innocent party when really she was the devil in disguise. “Rachel and I have a mutual agreement on this.” Charlie blinked and jerked back. “Pardon?” Like a co-conspirator, Maureen leaned in close. “She stays comfortably out of sight and no one gets to hear the sordid details of her affair.” Closing her eyes, Charlie wished she had fallen asleep and this was a nightmare soon to be over. She was in very deep and troubled waters here; she needed more than ever to be careful. Foot in mouth disease aside, she didn’t want to expose any of her closest friends to Maureen’s razor sharp mind. Just once, she wished she’d listened to all those media coaches Rachel had hired to try and train her to be a good little interviewee. Just once, she prayed she’d say the right thing. When she opened her eyes, she was surprised to see Maureen didn’t expose a tape recorder for their conversation. Not that she didn’t have one hidden somewhere on her, but usually these kinds of events were very open and up front. “Oh,” Maureen chuckled softly, leaning back in her chair. “I don’t record these things. And I don’t write anything down,” she tapped her temple. “I have an iron-clad memory.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Charlie swallowed the nervousness and called for her strength. “I do not want to be misquoted.” “Never,” Maureen waved a hand. “Now, if you don’t mind, I’d like to talk about last night.” Nodding, Charlie willed her muscles to relax. “You mean the Tantaliser concert?” Maureen nodded eagerly. “Yes, the Tantaliser concert. Tell me, who came up with the idea?” “That would be Nik. He just rang us up and invited us along. He said he thought it would be a great jam session.” “It was. I was there, darling. You all looked so comfortable up there together. I guess one couldn’t be blamed for wondering if it was more than that.” Frowning, Charlie tilted her head. “I don’t understand.” “Some might say you and Nik dreamed it up as a big publicity stunt.” “Maybe,” Charlie conceded. She’d known someone would say that much, at least. “But you could say that about everything bands do, couldn’t you?” “True,” Maureen smiled, seemingly giving Charlie kudos for her response. “But you could have declined the offer.” “And miss out on a great opportunity to play with a band of Tantaliser’s calibre? Are you nuts?” They both laughed and the mood around them lightened a little. Finally, Maureen seemed human. “No, I’m not insane, but I did see the way you and Nik looked at each other on stage. It was like you two were in a world of your own. Tell me, is “Bad Days” written about Nik?” Chewing over her answer for a moment, hiding her need for time by taking a sip of water from her glass, Charlie saw two options here. Either she confirmed the rumours about her and Nik—the ones Maureen was ever so subtly hinting at— or she came clean about her experience with Roger. Charlie despised both options. The truth was that there was so much unresolved between her and Nik, she didn’t want to throw a spanner in the works. Rocking the boat had never been a good idea, not with Gavin and certainly not with Roger, but with Nik it was different. Rocking the boat would send him away, give him reason to give up on them altogether. Although Charlie didn’t believe in fairy tale endings, she wasn’t quite ready to stomp all over any chance of finding something solid in Nik.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Charlie swallowed, steadying her jittery nerves. ““Bad Days” is about a woman who is trapped in an abusive relationship,” she explained, carefully weeding out anything that could link her with the woman in the song. “The inspiration for the song is universal. Do you know how many women are in abusive domestic relationships? Do you have any idea how hard it is for them to tear themselves out?” Maureen’s eyes softened with compassion, making it difficult for Charlie to go on with such a detached, emotionless voice. “After all the abuse, society still expects them to go out and find their happily-ever-after romances. Imagine trying to trust a man when the last one you were with beat you senseless. That’s what the song is about, finding trust again.” Silence blanketed them as they stared at each other. Where Maureen had once represented a sharp-toothed hunter, she now was a vision of compassion and empathy. The expression in her eyes seemed almost intimate, as if she were trying to read Charlie’s thoughts. There was a glimmer in her eye suggesting she knew Charlie really was the woman in the song. But if she thought it, she didn’t say. For that, Charlie would be eternally grateful. “I see,” Maureen mused thoughtfully. “And you want to say to those women that there is hope and help?” Charlie nodded. “Plenty of it, at least to get out of that sort of relationship. Finding trust again may not be so easy.” “And that’s what the last line is about, isn’t it? That if this new man in her life deceives her or hurts her, then she’s out of there before he can say boo, right?” Nodding again, feeling relief soothe her twitchy nerves, she smiled. “Absolutely. I mean, it really doesn’t matter who is causing the hurt and who is being hurt, the end result is that trust and faith become casualties.” Unexpectedly, Maureen leaned forward and rested her warm hand on Charlie’s arm. Sisterly comfort filled her eyes. Charlie couldn’t say she felt any kind of sisterly bond with this woman. After all, she’d been lucky enough to marry her childhood sweetheart, give birth to three apparently wonderful children, and live a fulfilling career. Had she ever experienced the pain of love? Did she know men who were capable of violence against women? Charlie didn’t know but she respected Maureen for her empathy and tact. “So will Tantaliser and Mystique team up again? Say, a collaborative effort on a future album?” Charlie shrugged. “Who knows what the future holds, Maureen?”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “So what’s next for Mystique?” “We’ve got a show to do tonight, and then a break. Our next stop is Washington, but that’s three weeks away. Until then, every one of the women in Mystique is going to have a well-earned rest.” Maureen smiled sincerely. “Together? Alone? Here in America?” Charlie laughed at the woman’s attempt to probe for details. “That’s not up for public debate Maureen. This is private time for us. We’ve been on the road for almost two years, we need some peace and quiet.” “And what about you, Charlie Brown? You took the music world by storm with your performance. Can we expect to see you break out on your own?” Sucking in some much-needed air, Charlie smiled. “I’m with Mystique, Maureen, and that’s all that matters right now.” “I see,” Maureen nodded. “Well, I do thank you for your time, Charlie. About that thing with Rachel…” Charlie shook her head. “Oh, you were telling the truth and I know Rachel believed you. Off the record Maureen, you can’t intimidate people like that, especially not my closest friend. And if you do print anything about her and this mysterious affair you’re referring to, I’ll see to it personally that you’re held accountable.” Maureen reeled back, surprised but not finished. “I see. So now I get to see the true Charlie Brown, huh?” “You don’t intimidate or scare me, Maureen. Just because we have a very public life, doesn’t mean your kind can make a mockery of us or spread scandalous gossip.” Charlie stood. She’d said too much, should’ve left it at “thanks for the interview”. Now she’d stuck one foot in her mouth, she should make a relatively timely exit and warn Rachel she was in for some backlash. Maureen stood too, several inches taller in her stilettos than Charlie. The compassion and empathy were gone from her eyes, replaced by that honed look reporters get when they think they’re on the trail of a good story. When Maureen stepped closer to her, Charlie had to stop herself from backing up. She would not let Maureen Fable intimidate her. “Oh, before I go,” Maureen whispered. “Just word of advice, from a married woman to a single one: don’t go getting involved with married men. The mistress never wins.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser As Maureen Fable disappeared through the revolving doors, Charlie blinked. Her mouth hung open and her heart sounded as if it had stopped altogether. Married men? What the hell was she talking about? The only man she was involved with was Nik, and Nik wasn’t married. Was he? Using her hand, she pushed her bottom jaw shut and then rubbed her eyes. The whole night felt like a surreal dream but now, it felt as if she’d stepped straight into some waking hellish nightmare. What the hell was going on? What did Maureen Fable know about Nik that she didn’t? Not one to stand around and wait for answers, Charlie marched toward the elevators. Tapping her foot impatiently, she waited for the doors to finally ping and slide open. Stepping in, she pressed the button for her floor four times before the car finally moved. Alone inside the elevator, her imagination banged desperately to break free from the tight reins she had on it. Given a millimetre of leeway, she’d come up with a million explanations for Maureen’s comment, not least of which was that he actually was married. But surely she would’ve known about a wife lurking in the background, wouldn’t she? After all, it wasn’t as if she’d only met Nik recently. And she was sure that if he did have a wife, tucked away in some dark corner of some tiny foreign country, some nosy reporter would have gotten wind of it much, much sooner than Maureen. By the time the elevator reached her floor, Charlie was ready for a fight. Her temperature was up, her heart pounded and every one of her nerves seemed alive. Along with her elevated blood pressure, however, came a searing headache. As the doors whooshed open, Charlie grabbed her head and sank to her knees. Squeezing her eyes shut, she felt a burning sensation sizzle down her spine and spread through her body. It wasn’t the burn or sizzle of sexual tension, it was far hotter and much more painful. It felt like her head was going to split in two and the only way she could stop it was to hold the two halves of her head together with her hands. There was no way she would make it to her room like this, no possible way she could grill Nik about a supposed wife. She couldn’t even get to her feet. The tiny room around her began to spin before the walls started to close in on her. Fumbling in her pocket for her cell phone, Charlie was relieved to hear the familiar voices of Dede and Anna rush toward her. While they repeatedly asked her what was wrong, she couldn’t answer them for every one of their words slammed into her head like a sledgehammer. When she opened her eyes, each word shook her vision, blurred her eyesight and caused her to cry out in pain. She wished she could just pass out, but no such comfort awaited her. Rather, when the elevator doors pinged and began to slide together, the rumble vibrated through her body and sounded more like a freight train running through her head.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Raising her head, she locked eyes with Dede and pressed a finger to her lips to silence them. As they complied, she searched for and found her cell phone and gave it to Dede. “Doctor,” she whispered, though in her head the word thundered and echoed to the point of insanity. ~ He couldn’t believe the Mystique concert was going to be broadcast live on MTV. How Rachel had managed such a sweet deal was beyond him but still, he would watch it with pleasure and be happy for them. Jealousy had never really been his thing, so while the popcorn popped in the microwave, Nik imagined the ways he’d make love to Catherine when she got back. He’d been surprised when she hadn’t come back straight after her interview but then figured she probably hooked up with the others for a final run of sound checks. He hadn’t been able to find any of them anywhere. Strangely enough, not having any of the Mystique girls around left the hotel feeling extra quiet. Not that they were outrageously loud or anything, but he felt their absence with uncanny acuity. On so many levels, he felt as if he’d been welcomed into their tight knit family, just as they had been welcomed into his. All of which left him feeling a little disappointed that he hadn’t heard from any of them before their show. As the microwave beeped for the final time, someone banged on his door. Aware that he only wore boxer shorts, Nik opened the door. Instead of the friendly, smiling face he expected, he found Casey red and flustered. Instantly Nik became worried. “What is it?” Casey pushed past and ordered Nik to shut the door. Stunned by the anger in the man’s voice, Nik did as he was told. Something was very wrong with this picture, and he had the unnerving suspicion he was at the centre of it. “You have a wife?” Nik blinked. “What?” He shouted, unintentionally raising his voice. Casey pointed at him with an accusing finger. “Apparently you are married.” “According to who?” Casey began to pace. Casey never paced unless he was worried sick. “According to Maureen Fable of “Worship” magazine, that’s who. You had better come clean with me, or else we’re done Nik.” Feeling anger jab and poke him, Nik dragged his hands over his face. How on earth had anyone found out about Penny? It was so long ago; they’d been so young. It had been
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser long before he released a single and he’d never discussed it since. The only way for anyone to know was if they’d gone digging through the archives at the offices of births, deaths and marriages. Even then, Nik reasoned, trying to stay calm, anyone who knew about his marriage to Penny would also know Penny died. “So Maureen says I have a wife and you believe her? I thought I could trust you.” Casey growled. “It’s not me you have to worry about, it’s Charlie. Who the hell do you think Maureen told about your wife?” Casey stared at him as realisation dawned. Oh sweet Jesus, Nik prayed as he rushed to the phone. He stopped when he heard the announcer on TV introduce the band. Of course he wouldn’t get her on the phone. She was there, in concert, probably cursing him and wishing he were dead. Now he understood why he hadn’t heard from her. Nik turned to the telly and squinted at the screen. The camera wasn’t close enough but he could have sworn the drummer looked decidedly masculine and remarkably like his own. “What the—?” He turned to Casey, pleading for some sort of explanation. Casey shook his head. “First, you tell me the truth. What the hell was Maureen talking about?” Nik sighed, his gaze returning to the television. Much to his surprise, Casey switched the damned thing off. “Tell me,” Casey demanded. “Why?” Nik growled, turning back to Casey. “I should be explaining this to Catherine, not you.” “Well, you’d better start with me. Your eyes weren’t deceiving you, she’s not at the concert.” Now it was Nik’s turn to pace. Spearing his fingers into his short hair, he felt totally disoriented and confused. Why wasn’t she at the concert? Why wasn’t she playing her beloved drums? He stopped abruptly and spun around. “Yes, I was married. Eighteen years old, married my childhood sweetheart. Penny was her name and we were deliriously happy. Twelve months later, she fell pregnant. It wasn’t supposed to happen so soon. I was supposed to become a big rock star first and then have a family.” He shook his head, trying to dispel the memories and the loss he still felt deep down. “When Penny went into labour, things went wrong. She died and so did the baby.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Casey stood in silence. Some of the anger disappeared from his eyes, replaced with sorrow and sympathy. Nik didn’t want the man’s pity. He wanted to know where Catherine was. “Jesus, Nik, I’m sorry.” “Where is Catherine?” When Casey didn’t answer, Nik chested up to him and grabbed him by the collar. “Where is she, damn it?” “Hospital, Nik. After she found out, she was coming to talk to you but they found her in the elevator.” Nik frowned, his grip on Casey’s collar loosening. “What do you mean, ‘they found her in the elevator’?” “I don’t know, exactly. Rachel’s there now. It’s bad Nik, really bad.” “Did she faint? What the hell happened?” Casey tried to back away but Nik refused to let go. “Let’s go to the hospital, Nik. Let’s go.” In a blinding rush, Nik dressed and raced with Casey to the hospital. All the while, his head played out various scenarios that saw Catherine either in serious pain or worse. The thought it could be happening again, that he could once more lose the love of his life tore at the very fabric that made him whole. He prayed the whole way there, pleading with a God he’d long ago given up to let her at least be safe. If she spurned him because he hadn’t told her about Penny, then so be it. But she couldn’t…he couldn’t even think the word, wouldn’t allow the possibility of it even to come close to her. They were unable to contact Rachel until they reached the hospital and found her sitting with her knees hugged to her chest at the nurse’s station. Coffee steamed beside her but she seemed oblivious to everything and everyone around her. Her sea blue eyes stared off into some pained nightmare only she could see. It stunned Nik that she didn’t even react to Casey’s touch, though the minute he saw her that way, he ignored Nik and held his woman in his arms. Standing alone, Nik looked for the nearest nurse’s station. He had to see Catherine, but when he took one step toward it, he was brought to a halt by Rachel. She stood in front of him, immovable and angry as hell. No words came to him so he just stood, keeping his expression as neutral as possible when all he could think about was Catherine in pain.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “You bastard,” Rachel screamed, flying at him and pummelling his chest with her not so feathery fists. Casey caught her from behind, held her still while she stared through Nik. “Yes, I was married. A long time ago, but she died during childbirth. I never told anyone because it wasn’t their business. I never told Catherine because it happened so long ago.” At the mention of the name Catherine, Rachel blinked and fixed him with a stare so full of hurt his breath caught in his throat. “You should have told her,” she whispered. “She really wanted to trust you.” “Rachel, I’m sorry.” “Sorry?” She shook her head, her eyes alight with fury. “I don’t think sorry will ever be enough.” He put his hand on her shoulder, grateful when she didn’t flinch or pull away. “Where is she, Rachel?” Rachel shook her head. “They sedated her to do a spinal. Don’t bother. They thought that maybe it was a stroke. But the CT was, thankfully, negative. It was another migraine, a real whopper.” He blinked, hating himself for thinking the next question, let alone asking it. “Why is Mystique even playing tonight?” She gave a wry grin; one so packed with hate it shocked him. “The show must go on, right?” “No,” he shook his head. “Not when a band member is in hospital.” She blinked and turned to Casey’s chest but Nik wouldn’t be denied. He turned and made his way to the nearest nurse’s station whereupon he demanded to know Catherine’s room number. The nurse, recognising him, nodded and offered to take him there herself. Where he would normally have rejected such an offer, Nik nodded his acceptance, untrusting of his ability to find the room with his head so off balance and his heart so full of dread. Chapter 12 He was met by the doctor, an elderly man with grey hair and a grim expression. It did nothing to ease Nik’s worry. Worse still, the man blocked the doorway.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “Can you tell me if she is going to be all right? It’s only a headache, right?” Nik pleaded before the doctor walked away. Turning, the older bespectacled man sighed, “I’m sorry, Mr.?” “Nik. Call me Nik.” “I can’t provide any information without Ms. Brown’s permission.” “But—” The doctor held up his hand. “I’m sorry. When she wakes, we can check with her. Once the appropriate releases are in place, I’d be happy to go over things with you.” Nik numbly accepted the explanation. “This is my fault,” he said. “I—I did something. Or more to the point, I didn’t do something. I should have…” The doctor smiled and gave Nik’s shoulder a sympathetic squeeze. “You’ll work it out, son,” he said, before walking away. Nik only nodded, dropping into a seat where he rested his head in his hands and stared at the floor. From what he knew, migraines were sometimes caused by stress and he had no doubt that was what had triggered Catherine’s migraine. Stress caused by thinking he had a wife. Strain caused by believing he’d lied to her. Trauma re-ignited from her past. All because some reporter wanted a cheap thrill at Catherine’s expense. “Excuse me,” a soft voice caused Nik to raise his head. It belonged to the nurse, who he’d completely forgotten about. She smiled gently. “Can I offer you anything? A coffee, perhaps?” Nik shook his head. “I just want to see her.” The slight woman with mousy brown hair, probably young enough to be fresh out of school, shook her head and gingerly sat beside him. “She’s heavily sedated. She wouldn’t know you were there.” “That’s not the point.” She squinted, not understanding him. “I need to see her,” he clarified, feeling utterly guilty that all he could think about right now was his need to touch her. “I love her.” She nodded, her expression softening. “I know. I was at your show last night. I saw the way you looked at her.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “You did?” “I’ve always liked your music,” she explained. “I really like Mystique’s music, too. I had tickets for tonight’s show but gave them away when my roster changed. Probably a good thing. I imagine it won’t be the same without her there.” Nik swallowed, his thoughts drifting to the other members of her band. He couldn’t help but wonder how they were coping, if they were coping. After all, Rachel was a mess, but then, the two had known each other forever. Still, he knew how much the others looked out for Catherine, the way they supported her music, marvelled at her talent. The more he thought about it, the more he realised that if they were, by some miracle, able to get through the show tonight, they would need some support after it. “Listen,” he said softly. “If you let me just go in and see her, I’ll arrange for a backstage pass for you to our next show. What do you say? I won’t be long, just a minute or two. Please?” “We can’t release information but there’s no restriction on visitors. It’s just that she’s sleeping and—” Nik didn’t even hear the remainder of what she said. He stood, his legs a little shaky, his heart fluttering at the thought of how she would look. At the very least, he needed her to hear his voice, feel his touch. At the most, he wanted to tell her he loved her. Not that it would make much of a difference until he fully explained about Penny. But when she was well again, he would tell her. It would scare her, make her want to turn and flee. She’d be mad because he said he didn’t want forever. Most of all, she would be afraid he expected something in return. For perhaps the first time in his life, Nik didn’t expect anything. He wanted plenty, but he didn’t expect it. If she sent him on his way, he would go. If she yelled and cussed and screamed, he’d stand there and take it. He wouldn’t think about what he would do if she accepted his declaration because the chance of it was too slim right now. With his hand poised on the knob, he took a deep breath. He’d been in a hospital before, knew he might find a woman in that bed who didn’t look much like the Catherine he’d come to know and love. It would hurt, but it wouldn’t last because unlike with Penny, Catherine was going to make it. She would get better, with or without him, and she would probably return to her old life. Without him to cause her stress and worry and anxiety, she could go back to being the Charlie everyone knew and loved. She might never again experience a headache or a migraine. He hesitated. Should he not go in? Should he turn and leave and never bother her again? If she was better off as a result, then he should. His hand left the door knob and
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser he stepped back. What if he went in and the sound of his voice upset her, even in her heavily sedated state? He loved her too much to for that. “Go on,” the nurse whispered. Nik swallowed. Okay, he reasoned, what do you want to do, old boy? His mind ticked over through the possibilities, but every time it came back to one common element: he had to see her. Without another moment of waste, he pushed through the door and stepped inside. Silence greeted him. In the dim light, her form lay deathly still under the covers. Her skin, ashen. Her face, almost grey. Her eyes were sunken, her hair limp. Beads of sweat dotted her brow. Her chest rose and fell ever so slightly with each breath. Lord but she looked so frail, so fragile. Stepping closer, Nik swept his eyes over her body, a figure he knew and appreciated, one he wanted to hold. If he could have laid beside her and used his body heat to warm her, he would have. But there wasn’t time. Instead, he settled for taking her hand in his and bending to press his lips to her cold palm. Covering her hand with both of his, he willed his warmth to go to her, his strength to cross the divide between them and help her heal. Nothing could replace the feeling that in some way, he was responsible for her condition. The understanding brought tears to his eyes. For the first time since Penny, he cried. When Penny had died, he’d felt no strength to go on. If he had to walk away from this love for Catherine to keep her safe and well, he was as good as drunk again. In his hands, her fingers moved. Remarkably, she gripped his hand and held on to him. When he looked to her face, there was no sign of consciousness, no alertness, no awareness. If she knew it was him, there was no sign to tell him that. Kissing each of her fingers, he silently promised to do whatever he could to help the others. And then, for better or worse, he promised he would return and they would talk openly, honestly, until they came to some sort of agreement. Placing her hand gently on the bed, he turned and left the room, then broke into a run as he left the hospital. ~ Waking, Charlie blinked up at the ceiling through fuzzy eyes. Her body felt weighed down by lead, her head the heaviest part. Although a dull ache still throbbed in her temples, she was over the worst of it. The antiseptic smell reminded her of where she was, but the dim light of the room gave her no indication of what time it was. She tried to roll her head to the side but failed. It required too much effort. Attempting to lift her hand to rub her eyes, she managed only to raise it an inch or two from the bed
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser before it thumped back down. At that point, someone moved, the rustle of clothing soft but reassuring. At least she could smile. Licking her lips, she tried to talk but only croaked. After a swallow, she managed to say one word. “Nik?” “No sweetheart,” Rachel’s voice soothed her. Then Rachel entered her field of vision. “He’s not here. It’s good to see you again.” Charlie felt Rachel take her hand, squeeze it, but was unable to return the gesture. “How do you feel?” “Tired,” she breathed. “Really tired.” Rachel nodded. “The doctor said that might happen. What do you remember?” Closing her eyes, Charlie remembered it as if it happened only moments ago. “Blinding headache.” “Actually, a migraine. The doctor gave you something to help you sleep it off.” She opened her eyes. “How long?” “How long have you been in hospital?” Rachel fussed with the blanket and avoided Charlie’s inquisitive stare. “How long?” Rachel stilled. “Just overnight, honey.” Charlie felt her eyes go wide but didn’t feel in control of the expression. “The show?” Rachel smiled. “It’s okay. I had Brooksy fill in for the night. The crowd wasn’t so pleased, but they got over it when we announced you were unwell. I know you can’t see around the room, but it’s filled with flowers and balloons and lots of get well gifts.” Charlie licked her dry lips again. She wanted to sit up, to feel normal again. What had the doctor given her? It sure was powerful stuff. She tried to move her hand again, and was successful only in sliding it up onto her chest. “You even have a bunch of flowers from Maureen,” Rachel said sarcastically, moving out of her line of sight. “Stupid witch.” “Maureen?”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “Maureen Fable, the cow who did this to you.” Charlie would have laughed if she could have. Rather, she simply closed her eyes. Maureen Fable didn’t come to her mind. The only person she saw was the man she desperately needed to talk to. Her memory wasn’t so clouded that she couldn’t remember what Maureen had told her about Nik. He had a wife. But only Nik could answer that accusation. Sadly, she suspected if she quizzed Rachel about his whereabouts, she would get the run-around. “It wasn’t Maureen,” Charlie finally responded, a little more in command of her mouth now. She wouldn’t mind a sip of water. “No, but we’re not going to mention his name,” Rachel said. She sounded angry and hurt. “It wasn’t Nik.” Rachel appeared above her, her blonde hair glowing in the lamplight. “Yes, it was. He lied to you, hurt you. I will never forgive him.” “Can I see him?” Rachel shook her head slowly. “Bad idea. Doctor says you could experience another migraine just by saying his name.” “Hogwash,” Charlie rebutted. “I’m not allergic to him.” Rachel harrumphed before walking away again. Charlie could hear her moving things about but still couldn’t see her. She tried to roll her head and managed a small move, but was so overcome by dizziness she felt like she would throw up. Twenty-four hours she’d been lying here like a vegetable, unable to do anything because she was sedated. For her own good, yeah, she’d heard that one before. It was the sort of advice that could be lumped in with, “Get a good night’s sleep”. She wasn’t a child and she wouldn’t stand to be treated like an invalid. It was understandable Rachel wanted to protect her and care for her, but she couldn’t live her life for her either. “Has he been to see me?” Silence greeted her. Charlie took that as an emphatic yes. “You wouldn’t let him.” Rachel snapped. “He hurt you.” “He explained everything, didn’t he?”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser There was a moment’s hesitation before Rachel finally replied with a soft, “Yes.” “I want to see him.” Rachel appeared above her again, her face a mixture of fear and worry. “I don’t think that’s wise. You need to rest and recover. I’ve found a nice little cabin for you, where you can recuperate. It’s in the forest and is a lot like home.” “I don’t want to go anywhere, Rach. I need to talk to Nik.” Throwing her hands in the air in frustration, Rachel walked away. She didn’t leave the room, just went back to fussing over something out of sight. While Charlie couldn’t see her, she knew whatever Rachel was doing could wait. Her friend was procrastinating, stalling, though the reason why was a bit of a mystery. “Rachel, what’s wrong?” “Nothing.” Charlie smiled. “Liar. Tell me.” Rachel sighed loudly. “It’s not really Nik’s fault. It’s mine. I told you to go for it.” Charlie let her eyes drift shut. So now Rachel felt guilty and responsible. Why wouldn’t people learn that this was a physiological problem? It was Charlie’s responsibility to seek treatment and prevent further occurrences. At least now she had something definitive to treat and prevent, unlike her knotted brain. “I didn’t have to follow your advice,” Charlie parried, still with her eyes closed. “I’m a big girl, Rachel, I make my own decisions. I wanted to be with him. Right now, I want to hear what he has to say for himself.” “Are you sure?” “Are you a real blonde?” Rachel chuckled and Charlie felt the tension lift from the room. “I’ll tell him you want to talk, but right now, I want you to talk to the doctor.” “No.” “Stop being stubborn, Cat,” Rachel pleaded. “The doctor will want to talk to you anyway.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “He can speak to me after I see Nik and that’s final. Now please, go and get him for me.” She’d never before issued commands to anyone, let alone Rachel. “He’s not here, Cat.” Rachel sounded sad, bringing Charlie’s eyes open. “What do you mean?” “I told him he wasn’t welcome. He’s at the hotel. I really don’t think it’s a good idea.” “Why?” Rachel appeared above her again, making Charlie really want to sit up. “I’m worried it will trigger another migraine. It’s important you get your rest and get better.” Charlie heard the inferred but unspoken meaning. It was important that she got better without Nik, meaning there was a whole bunch of truth to the wife story. The thought saddened Charlie. He had a wife? How had she not known? How had he kept it a secret for so long? “I’ll get the doctor,” Rachel said before disappearing from view again. With a thousand unanswered questions, Charlie started to wonder if talking to Nik was a good idea after all. If he really did have a wife, he could spin numerous tales and lies to cover his tracks. Meanwhile, she was left with a broken heart because she’d stupidly allowed him in. She’d recklessly believed his false truths and allowed the little girl inside to flourish and encourage her to have faith again. Faster than she could counter, anger welled deep inside Charlie. While flashes of light assaulted her eyes, pain throbbed in her right temple. If this was another migraine, then she willed it to take over and force her to blackout. Anything to avoid having to deal with her foolish behaviour, her naïve hope that he could prove her wrong. He had a wife and it proved her right. Men were scum who lied through their teeth. She didn’t hear the door open, only heard the doctor’s voice boom through the silence. If she could’ve moved, she would have covered her ears to ward off the intensified sound. Instead, she squeezed her eyes shut and prayed for unconsciousness to claim her. What she got however was another prick in the arm and the soothing feel of the sedative calming her racing heart and her pained head. ~ Her eyes popped open at the sound of Rachel’s voice. Accompanied by an unfamiliar deep baritone companion, Rachel sounded panicked and worried. She quizzed the man about Charlie’s health, asking if she would ever be able to control the migraines. The
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser man, a doctor, Charlie presumed, chuckled softly and explained many people lived happy and healthy lives even with these kinds of migraines. Without the heavy leaded feeling of earlier, Charlie could turn her head and see the two of them talking. The tall doctor was the first to notice she was awake and he turned to her with a warm smile. He was young, perhaps only in his mid-thirties with shiny black hair and beautiful olive skin. When he stepped toward her, Charlie returned his smile. “Welcome back,” he said softly. “How are you feeling?” “Tired,” Charlie managed through sticky dry lips. With a gracefulness she’d never seen in a man, he glided toward her and picked up a glass from the bedside table. He positioned the straw where she could reach it and allowed her to sip at the water. “Thank you,” she swallowed, feeling better. “How long was I out?” He pulled over a chair and sat beside her. “You’ve been here for two days in total, Catherine.” She blinked. “I don’t understand. Why was I out for so long?” “I suspect that each one of these episodes drains your energy. We only gave you a light sedative the second time around, one that should have only eased the pain.” Charlie turned her eyes to Rachel. “That’s why you’re so worried, isn’t it?” Rachel, whose eyes were bloodshot and moist with tears, only nodded. “Tell me,” she said to the doctor. “How did these headaches become migraines?” “Sometimes migraines begin when we’re young, and sometimes, they begin later in our lives. The patterns of them can be terribly varied and unpredictable. Yours seem to be triggered by stress and anger. Perhaps your lifestyle has something to do with it, perhaps not.” She frowned. “That’s really wishy-washy,” she said. “Can you be more specific?” He turned to Rachel. “Can I have a few moments alone with her?” Rachel nodded and left. “I think,” he said softly, fixing Charlie with those dark sensuous eyes again. “Yours are partly caused by things going on in your life. Forgive me if I seem too bold, but this has to do with your boyfriend. Am I right?”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Boyfriend? Sighing, Charlie nodded. Unlike last time, she didn’t feel like she’d throw up. “It’s complicated.” “I see. And how have you dealt with that?” “Not very well,” she supposed. “I’ve been hurt in the past, and didn’t want to be burned again.” He nodded and placed his warm hand over hers. “That I understand, Catherine, but if there’s one thing I’ve learned in life, it’s that you gain nothing by not taking risks.” “But the next risk I take could kill me.” “No,” he shook his head, his smile warm but non-patronising. “Nothing so dramatic. You should never let fear rule your life. Rather, you should allow love to enter it any way you can. Sometimes love only lasts for a short time, sometimes forever.” Ever the pragmatist, Charlie shook her head. “Too simple.” “Eh, simple works for me,” he shrugged and smiled. “Now, on to your treatment.” ~ When the doctor left, Rachel took his place by Charlie’s side. Nothing pained her more than the fear in her friend’s eyes and so, summoning all of her strength, Charlie pulled herself up to embrace Rachel. “I was so scared for you.” “I know,” Charlie smiled, rubbing Rachel’s back. “But you don’t have to be.” “You could have these migraines for life,” Rachel reminded her, pulling back to meet her eyes. “Don’t dismiss them.” Charlie nodded. “I know and I won’t. But I have to deal with Nik sooner or later.” “Later,” Rachel pleaded. “Go to the cabin, spend some time getting stronger so that when you do come face to face with him, you won’t crumble under the force of another migraine.” She wasn’t going to argue this time. Rather, Charlie nodded and accepted the small getaway Rachel had arranged for her. It helped to ease Rachel’s guilt and her eyes lightened in response.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “You can’t wrap me up in cotton wool, Rachel. I need to face the truth sooner or later. I don’t know if his explanation will be good enough, but I’ve shared too much with him to just shut him out of my life. I don’t know how, but Nik feels as much a part of me as does my music. I owe it to my heart to hear him out.” ~ Nik paced his hotel room. In the last four days, he felt as if he’d reached the edge of insanity more than once. According to Casey, Cat had experienced another severe migraine when she’d woken, so disturbed by the news he had a wife she had to be sedated again. Now he knew he couldn’t go to her because if the thought of him did that to her, then he hated to think what his presence would do. He’d spoken to Rachel only once since Catherine had been admitted to hospital. It was clear she didn’t want him to go back or to make contact with her dearest friend any time soon. The words she’d used were completely honest and totally raw and he’d feared she would break down during their confrontation. Nothing would ever erase the look of pure terror in Rachel’s eyes, fearing she might lose her best friend. His own heart mirrored that emotion, though to him, Catherine wasn’t a close friend. He hadn’t told Rachel how he felt. Couldn’t bring himself to tell her he didn’t just love Catherine but he thought of her as the true love of his life. In the end, that wasn’t enough. His very presence hurt her, physically and emotionally. In a strange thought, he boiled it down to the simple notion that she was allergic to him. Her reaction manifested itself in the form of a migraine severe enough to knock her unconscious. Once upon a time, he would have thought such an idea completely absurd. Now, he saw it as truth. Turning, he spied the bottle of Johnny Walker and the glass. As yet, he hadn’t opened it. Rather, he let it serve as a reminder. Despite hauling his drunken ass out from the deepest bottle years ago, he was never very far from returning to the same spot. He had to work hard to stay on dry ground. After losing Penny, he’d drowned his sorrows in booze. Back then, he hadn’t had any responsibilities to anyone but himself. Right now, he had shows to perform, music to write, fans to please, and a band that relied on him. Things were different, and while the bad boy rocker didn’t care who he let down, Nik couldn’t bring himself to twist the top off the bottle. Doing so would only play into her belief that like all the men in her life, he’d walked out and hurt Catherine. Yeah, he’d walked away, but he hadn’t walked out. Although he didn’t know how to explain the difference between the two, he knew the gulf between them was plausible. He still loved her, would still write songs inspired by her, and would be more than happy to give up his life so she never suffered another migraine. But he
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser couldn’t be near her even though every fibre of his being desperately wanted to touch her. Life was playing a cruel joke on him, letting him know that no matter what kind of man he was or how hard he tried, he’d never have the woman he loved. In a terrible twist of fate, Penny hadn’t just been ripped from his arms; she’d been torn from this mortal coil. And while history was only half repeating itself this time with Catherine, Nik understood the message loud and clear. Striding over to the bottle, he picked it up. He tried to ignore the latest tabloid on his coffee table, but failed. Damned paparazzi. Couldn’t keep their noses out of his life. It wasn’t enough that he’d lost her, or that she suffered. Now the dirty laundry had been hung out for all to see. The papers screamed about his wife, painting him a two-timing rat bastard. Didn’t matter his publicist needed to work non-stop to iron out the unwanted wrinkle, or that he’d received so many emails his inbox had ceased to function. The only thing Nik cared about was Catherine. The smooth texture of the glass under his fingertips felt so damned familiar he almost changed his mind. Twisting off the cap, he poured the small shot glass full of the amber liquid. His mouth watered for the zing, his taste buds dancing a merry jig in anticipation. The heavy bottle in his hands reminded him of all the meaningless pleasures he’d had while besotted by its contents. In a blinding flash of fury, he straightened, drew his arm back and threw the bottle at full force. It smashed and he watched as the liquid ran down the wall. To his right, his hotel room door flew open. As if Casey had been waiting outside for just this moment to crash through. “Don’t bother,” Nik growled. “There’s no point. I want to get bloody drunk. If you’re here, then you’re going to join me.” Casey entered, picked up a trashcan and knelt in front of the small, fully stocked bar fridge. Almost dream-like, Nik could do nothing to stop his friend from emptying the fridge of all the small and large bottles of grog. When he was done, he stood and stopped at the shot glass still sitting on the coffee table. He glanced from Nik to the glass and then back to Nik’s face. “I’ll leave you with one mouthful of the vile stuff. When you’re done with the self-pity bullshit, come and find me and we’ll talk.” As quick as he entered, Casey left and Nik found himself alone. Grief flooded through his veins as he realised how much he needed Catherine in his life. But he couldn’t have her, Mother Nature and Fate had conspired to make it so. Marriage, love, children—she’d been shown from an early age those things weren’t reliable and trustworthy. Trust, faith, honour—she’d learned from her past experiences
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser with men those things didn’t count for too much. He wanted to give her all of that, restore her belief, but if he could give it to her—if by some miracle that was even possible—it still wasn’t enough. She was the only one capable of bringing them back together. It was up to her now, though with Rachel so mad at him and the others in the band barely able to forgive his oversight, Nik wasn’t counting on it. A great sense of dread washed over him that the minute he closed the door and cut off his view of her, he would never see her again. Worse still, there was no one in her world on his side, no one there to go into bat for him. Hell, after keeping his marriage to Penny a secret for so long, there were very few people in his world ready to go into bat for him. He was in a lose-lose situation and the sooner he accepted it, the better. He’d pursued her for so long, been with her for such a short time. Now he was going to lose her to forces he couldn’t control. Nik wanted to rage, to scream that it wasn’t fair. Life had screwed them both. Sinking into the couch, he stared at the ceiling and realised with a start that as yet, he hadn’t explained the wife thing to her. And if there was one thing he needed to do before he walked away forever, it was to explain it to her face to face. Chapter 13 With the sun’s rays warming her back, Charlie skipped from one exposed rock to another in the shallows of the lake. It reminded her of the times her mother had taken her down to the river where she’d hopped barefoot along the edge of the water. Her balance true, she’d never fallen in. Now was no different, though she didn’t feel as young or as innocent. Her shoulders felt heavy, weighed down by recent events. Her neck, stiff with worry about how she could move on after Nik. Her eyes, tired from holding back the tears of anger and dented pride. Despite hiding here in the mountains at the edge of the lake for almost a week now, Charlie felt no different. Nothing had changed because she hadn’t spoken to Nik. True, she enjoyed the peacefulness and the quiet. The solitude gave her time to realise that her journey through rock stardom had, so far, been highly rewarding and truly enjoyable. In so many ways, Charlie was thankful for everything she’d achieved, seen, and done. The friends she’d made along the way were keepers for life and as for the fans, well, she could only enjoy their support and their generosity. News of her ‘condition’ had brought incredible gifts and messages of best wishes and she made sure to spend at least an hour each day writing letters of thank you in return.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser While the cabin had a TV, a radio and a telephone, Charlie had not used any of them since arriving. Granted, she’d sent a text message to Rachel to announce her safe arrival, but since then, she’d used her time to explore the surrounding forest, swim in the lake and drive to the nearby small town to wander through the streets. No one recognised her, though they treated her kindly and offered coffee and cake. Back at the cabin, Charlie put on the coffee pot to brew while she got to work on thanking her fans for their kind thoughts. Over on the small table beside the comfortable bed, she spied the half-folded letter she’d begun earlier. This one wasn’t addressed to a fan—though he had been to her shows. Rather, it was written to Nik and at last count, it was the sixth draft. No matter how hard she tried, she was unable to get the wording quite right, sounding either too forgiving or too angry. In a moment of desperation, she wondered why she was even writing to him, but the answer to that was as obvious as the colour of the sky. At the heart of the matter lay two equal and undeniable truths. In the first instance, there were too many feelings and explanations left unsaid. Regardless of the future, Charlie knew she had to speak her mind some time soon, just as much as she had to hear from Nik’s mouth the words he needed to say. She’d been honest with Rachel when she’d said they’d shared too much for it to end so suddenly. Without Nik, Charlie realised it might have been a very long time before she gave another man a moment of her time. Until Nik came along, she hadn’t thought she’d ever give a man a piece of her heart. In the second instance, Charlie had come to the conclusion that despite all the dangers associated with letting Nik into her heart, she cared for him deeply. It mattered to her what emotions he was experiencing because, despite having a wife somewhere in his past, Nik was honest with her. Well, as honest as a man can be when he’s hiding a secret as grand as a wife. Yet, as she wrote and re-wrote the letter, she became increasingly aware of the inadequacies of a hand written letter. It was too one-sided, there was no room for answers. Equal to the risk of him lying to her was the chance that he’d tell her the honest truth. While the fact he had a wife scared her to bits, Charlie couldn’t bear being left in the dark. Glancing once again at the letter, Charlie sighed sadly and shook her head. Now was not the time to finish it, or re-write it, or even think about it. She had to get on with thanking her well-wishers. Simple as that task may be, she couldn’t get her mind to focus. Words streamed through her head but none of them were appropriate to write to fans. Rather, they were words she needed to say to Nik. Growling in frustration, she decided she needed a distraction. Taking a seat on the extra-soft couch, she picked up the remote for the TV and turned it on. Flicking through the channels, she was amazed to find very little held her attention. Until she switched to the MTV channel where an advertisement for the live broadcast of Tantaliser’s concert
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser jumped out and grabbed her by the shirt. It started at eight, a few hours from now, and promised to be a fantastic event. Charlie didn’t doubt it. It dawned on her that if Nik was able to perform in concert, then he was probably faring much better than she. She didn’t know how she felt about that. Being angry at him made her seem like a jealous fool. Being happy for him made her seem like an easy target, too forgiving and too easily trampled. But for Charlie, there was no happy medium between those extremes. If she could choose, she would lean toward being mad at him because she didn’t want to be the only one feeling this dejected and lost. Giving the letter one last long look, Charlie gave in to the anger building within her. Striding over, she picked up the single piece of paper and tore it into little tiny pieces. Forget writing to him, giving him the breathing space to respond, she thought savagely. She was going to confront him, face to face, so he could see just how much he’d hurt her. Until then, she would not watch his show. No way would she give him the satisfaction of knowing she couldn’t keep her eyes off him, that she still wanted him in her life and in her bed. Because that was the cold hard truth. No matter how much he’d hurt her, she still wanted him. There was so much wrong with that, she didn’t know where to begin. It was a left over from her time with Roger. Even after she’d managed to escape, she’d still thought about him, had still wanted to call him, to see how he was doing. Rachel’s quick thinking had prevented her from allowing him to worm his way back into her life. If it wasn’t for Rachel, Charlie knew she would have fallen prey to the traps Roger had set for her time and time again. Spurred into action, angered by the helplessness she’d felt around Roger and the desire she still had for Nik, Charlie scrounged around for her cell phone. She’d let Nik know he could forget about manipulating her and go back to his wife. Turning the cell phone on, a dozen chimes let her know she had just as many messages. Debating only for a moment, she opened the inbox to see who they were from. All twelve messages from the one man. Nik. Damn him. Throwing caution to the wind, she opened the first one to see only two words, “I’m sorry.” The second message contained the same sentiment, as did the third and the fourth. She was about to give up when the fifth message finally had something different.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “Penny was my first wife. Married at eighteen. Dead at twenty, complications during childbirth.” Charlie sucked in a saddened breath as compassion flowed through her veins. He’d lost his wife. How cruel, she thought. Quickly, she closed the message and opened the sixth. “My son also died. My world fell apart. That was when I hit the booze.” Blinking rapidly, she flipped through the rest of the messages, piecing them together and almost hearing Nik’s voice in her head read them to her. “Booze, sex, drugs, I used them all to try and wipe Penny from my memory. It didn’t work. I did some very stupid things during that time.” “The pain of her memory was with me all the way until I sought professional help. I lost, I grieved, I moved on.” “For a long time, I never thought I’d find love again. I had hoped, but I wasn’t holding my breath.” “Until you barged into that audition and took a strangle hold on my life.” “Will you at least talk to me? Over the phone, please, please, please?” With eleven short but honest messages he punched a hole through her defences and diminished her anger to a pile of dust. Although she couldn’t blame him for not telling her about Penny, it didn’t make things right given the way she’d found out. He should have told her, but she supposed the point was moot now. The only thing that really mattered was where they went from here, because it was clear he wasn’t giving up on her just yet. The thought warmed her. Opening the final message from Nik blew apart her resolve to keep the telly switched off for the night. “Please watch the show”. Four words, that was all, and she was scrambling to get herself comfy to watch yet another Tantaliser concert. Still with her cell phone in hand, she dialled Rachel’s number and waited impatiently for her friend to pick up. “Hi, Cat,” Rachel chimed happily. “How are you feeling?” “Very good. Why didn’t you tell me the story about Nik’s wife?” Rachel coughed. “Say that again?”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “You heard me,” Charlie said sternly, wondering if Rachel was with Casey getting ready for the show. “You knew she’d died. Why did you let me believe he really did have a wife?” Rachel sighed. In the background, Charlie only heard silence and deducted that Rachel was, in fact, in her hotel room in Washington. “I’m sorry. But I didn’t want to give you false hope. He lied to you. Nothing changes that.” Charlie found herself nodding. “True. But if there’d been less melodrama, maybe I wouldn’t have had the migraines.” Rachel was silent. “I’m not blaming you, I’m just saying that maybe we all could have handled this better.” “Maybe. You know they’re live on MTV tonight, right? Are you going to watch it?” “Yes. And then I’m packing my bags.” “Take your time, Cat,” Rachel pleaded. “Don’t put your health at risk for him.” Charlie smiled. Rachel seemed destined to always be looking out for her. One day, she would thank her. “I won’t do anything rash,” she said suggestively, knowing it would leave Rachel imagining all sorts of crazy stunts Charlie might pull. ~ Later, as the sun slipped behind the mountains in the distance and the night air cooled, Charlie snuggled under a blanket in the dark. The only light came from the television as she watched the introductory pyrotechnic display characteristic to a Tantaliser show. She watched intently as each of the band members were called on to stage by some booming but unknown voice. Nik came last, floating down onto the stage from the roof, suspended by invisible wires. He wore his traditional black leather pants, studded belt and torn black tee, looking every bit the naughty rocker he liked to think he was. New Yorkers went wild for him and she had to wonder how many of them had already been to one of his shows in the last two weeks. It was hard not to smile at the sight of him. She tried to remember the hurt she’d felt at hearing he had a wife, at the thought he’d lied to her. But in the big scheme of things, Nicholas St. Eve had only fallen short in so much as failing to mention a period in his past that probably still haunted him. Charlie did her best to remember not just the pain he’d caused, but all the good times she could recall. The first memory to hit her was of the two of them in the closet in LA. The forbidden pleasure of sneaking backstage and making out with the hot and dreamy
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Nicholas St. Eve sent a thrill up her spine even now. She shuddered under the power of it, and then shuddered again at the memory of their first phone ‘conversation’. He was enigmatic on stage, hard not to watch. Tearing her eyes away was not an option as she allowed herself to be hypnotised by his every move. Despite her past telling her to throw away the girly, childish notions of happily-ever-after’s instilled by countless fairytales and bedtime stories, Charlie felt the well of hope rise in her heart. She thought he hadn’t wanted that—he’d told her he hadn’t wanted it, but somewhere along the way, they’d both fallen into the trap. That was why news of his ‘wife’ had shattered her, and why she now had to fight off the flood of revenge sweeping through her. Maureen Fable wasn’t worth wasting her time over and besides, Charlie was sure Rachel had that covered. On the TV screen, the noise of the band quieted and the camera zoomed in close on Nik. He grinned wildly, looking as if he was having the time of his life. But there was something deep in his eyes that troubled her. She didn’t know what, but was sure it had to do with why he’d begged her to watch the show. “We have a special treat for you all,” he crooned, to which the audience erupted. “Yes kids, we have two more new songs for you tonight. This first one is in respect for a fallen brother, a comrade who died far too young and left behind a legion of fans who will forever miss him. Many critics have said that I’m heartless, that I don’t care about Bobby’s death. Well, this song should silence those critics. This one is for Bobby Dale and is called “Crash and Burn”.” Fate stole you away Tragically ripping you from this life I will never forget that day You were in so much strife We shared it all The good times and the bad Man, we were having a ball Thinking of your death, I get so mad I think about you all the time The friendship we shared The shattered dream a crime Really, I don’t think He cared Haunted by the words I never said Scared your voice would leave my head Pursued by the memories of that day Tried so hard to run away
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Buried my head in the sand Turned away every helping hand Worked myself into the ground Hoped like hell I’d never be found Found by the warm glow of life Love that could bring me back to life The support my friends could give To once again really live You’re gone, I know that in my heart I remember those words, best friends never part Death has come and taken you my friend But I know you’re watching me, friends to the end When he was done, the audience stood in stunned silence. Moments passed before they broke into a rapturous applause and threatened to bring down the roof. As for Charlie, she had to wipe away the tears. She knew how deeply Bobby’s death affected him and yet, the lyrics to the song seemed so poignant, so painfully true she wanted to wrap Nik in a warm embrace. While the band broke into a well-known song, she blew her nose and wiped her eyes. He was right; the song should definitely shut the critics up. That was the least they could do, after giving him such a hard time about Bobby’s untimely death. It wasn’t until half way through the concert that Nik slowed the show again. When the crowd settled, Nik spoke into his microphone. Somehow, he found the camera trained on him and peered straight down the barrel of the lens. Right at her. She was sure he could sense her watching and when he winked seductively, she knew it. “And for our second new song,” he grinned. “This one goes out to a woman we all know. A wonderful lady we all want to get better so that she can once again bang her drums for our entertainment. This one’s for you, Charlie.” Feeling like a giddy schoolgirl, Charlie suddenly looked around to make sure she was alone. Goose bumps pebbled her flesh as the most intimate of shivers crept up her neck. Lord but he was a bad boy. It wasn’t like he was out-ing them—they were ‘out’ already—or divulging any great secret. But confirming the rumour was clearly his intention as he broke into a song she’d never heard but one she recognised instantly. You said it was too complicated That things kept getting in the way I know they were just excuses To drive some distance between us But honey, I’m not giving up
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser I know we’ll be great together As soon as things aren’t so… Complicated Calculus and physics Now they’re complicated Genetics and science Tip the scales of complicated But the magic we share Is as simple as a clear morning sky I know you’ve been hurt in the past Your heart so scarred the hurt doesn’t stop So you built walls of solid brick Two feet thick, eight feet high Just to keep me out, but baby I’m not here to hurt you So let’s not allow things to stay so… Complicated Needless to say, the song had to be titled “Complicated”. She almost laughed at the sentiment. Since they’d pushed aside the complications, it seemed sad she’d let so much get in the way. It was almost as if she allowed things to become complicated in some attempt to protect her heart from any more hurt. But the truth was, she couldn’t live an isolated life. She liked people, especially the people already surrounding her. If they were fallible, then so was she. On the TV, Charlie blinked at the audience’s reaction to the song. She heard her name, just as she’d done after her first vocal performance of “Bad Days”, chanted by thousands in unison. Char-lie, Char-lie. When the camera panned back to Nik, she saw he was joining in, pumping his fist in the air with each shouted syllable. The others too, Skeet, Casey, Jason and Brooksy, also chanted her name. On closer inspection however, she saw Nik actually call out her true name. Cath-rine, Cath-rine. He really knew how to get under a girl’s skin. ~
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Every bone in his body ached and his heart threatened to break. He hadn’t heard from her at all. At the very least, he’d hoped for one text message in response to the dozen he’d sent. But alas, when he checked his cell phone, the infernal contraption registered no message at all. Disappointment washed over him as he accepted the possibility that she’d erased every message he sent and deliberately refrained from watching the show. Staring at the grey light edging around the borders of the curtains, he groaned and pulled the blankets over his head. He was a fool to think he could win her over with text messages and a song of dedication. It only now dawned on him just how deeply he’d hurt her with his unintentional omission of the past. He’d held himself back when she opened herself so completely. It wasn’t something he could easily explain either, because it had crossed his mind to tell her he’d once been married, but he’d let her silence him with a simple kiss. Somehow, he didn’t think telling her that it fell from his thoughts because he’d been so besotted with her and so fully consumed by her presence would do any good. Too much time had passed, too many words had been spoken by outsiders to influence her decision. It was bad enough she’d disappeared without a trace. Of course, Rachel knew exactly where she was, but the woman kept that information very close to her heart indeed. He understood Rachel’s fear of losing her to some medical condition, because he felt it too. The difference was, he’d been down that road before and he wasn’t sure he could cope a second time around. “So you’re awake then?” Casey’s voice disrupted the silence, sounding like a roaring rocket in the peaceful morning. Nik threw the blankets off and peered around the room. “Jesus,” he groaned. “How long have you been sitting there?” Casey, tucked away in a corner where Nik would never have bothered to look, simply shrugged. He unfolded his long legs and stretched sleepily. “All night. Wanted to make sure you didn’t do something stupid.” Nik grunted. “You mean like get wasted?” Casey nodded. “Well, you already took care of that, didn’t you? You’re such a spoil sport.” Nik sighed as he fell back to the bed. “She’s gone, for good. Hasn’t she?” “You lied, man.” Casey repeated the truth for about the millionth time. “You didn’t tell her about Penny. Do you know what that does to a woman?”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “Yeah,” Nik nodded, lamenting his poor choice of keeping Catherine in the dark. “I know what that does to a woman. Don’t talk to me like I’m an idiot. All I want to do is talk to Catherine in person, face to face.” “You’ve done all you can.” “I bet she didn’t even watch the show last night.” Casey sighed. “I don’t know the answer to that one, but I’ll tell you this, the tabloids love you.” When Nik raised his head again, he saw the page Casey held up. It should have made him happy, erased the hurt and left him feeling like the king of the world again. It didn’t do either of those things. All it did was make him excruciatingly aware of how lonely it felt at the top. “Put it away.” “No, seriously,” Casey sounded excited. “Listen to this.” He cleared his throat in preparation to read. “Last night, thousands of adoring Tantaliser fans fell in love with Nicholas St. Eve all over again as he poured his heart out on stage, revealing just how deeply he hurt over the loss of his band member and long time friend, Bobby Dale. In a song packed with emotion and sung so brilliantly well, Nik told the tale of how he lost his friend and how he found the strength to go on.” Nik almost laughed. So now he finally gets kudos? Well, he hadn’t done it for the publicity, that was for bloody sure. “Crash and Burn” was a dedication from the heart, not aimed at garnering donations for the hip pocket. But the press never saw it that way and it left Nik feeling worse again. Unfortunately, Casey continued. “But the true moment of the night belonged to Nik’s sweet and heartfelt dedication to none other than Charlie Brown, of Mystique, in a song that clearly spoke volumes. The man is in love and where this reporter thought that might hurt his public image, it has actually left thousands of female fans leaving messages on Mystique’s website for Charlie to come to her senses.” If only it were that simple, Nik lamented. Wherever she’d gone, she probably didn’t care to catch up on the latest news or check her website. Hell, she didn’t even respond to her phone messages, probably having turned it off in a bid to avoid him. Well, he thought, slowly raising the bed covers over his head again, it had worked. She’d avoided him all right. “Are you even listening?” Casey whined, sounding like a little kid who’d been ignored and didn’t like it. “No,” Nik grumbled.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “I don’t know why I bother,” Casey chastised. “You’re a drag when you’re like this. Tell me, if I leave you on your own, will you do anything stupid?” Nik laughed, really laughed. “Firstly,” he said from under the blankets. “There’s no booze in the fridge. Secondly, there are no drugs in the room. Thirdly, I’m not likely to jump out of the window. Are you happy?” “No,” Casey insisted. “Are there any razor blades about?” “I’m not going to off myself. I promise. Satisfied?” There was only muffled noise as Casey moved about without speaking. Then, without warning, the blankets were yanked back to expose Nik. He glared up at Casey menacingly. The man didn’t take a hint. “No, not satisfied, you fool. I don’t like seeing you like this.” Nik shrugged. “Not much I can do about it.” “Well, if you’re going to stay like this, then you’ll need some company. I’ll just take my seat over here again and…” “No,” Nik growled. “Go away and leave me to wallow in self-pity a little longer, will you?” Casey grinned but any words he might have spoken were cut off when Nik’s cell phone sprang to life, singing out the tune to Catherine’s “Bad Days”. Nik froze. He’d programmed the damn phone to play that tune when she called but it couldn’t be. How could she be calling him now? After almost two weeks without seeing her and no word after all the messages he left, he’d begun to believe he’d never see her again. “Answer it,” Casey insisted. “It’s not her,” Nik shook his head and retrieved the phone from the bedside table. Bringing it up, he saw her name and number scrawled on the LCD display. “This is a trick of sorts, someone is playing me.” “Just answer the damn thing,” Casey snapped before walking out. Warily, he pressed the talk button and put the phone to his ear. “Catherine?” “Hey babe,” she crooned, causing Nik to sit up and grip the phone as if it were the only connection to her he’d ever have.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Chapter Fourteen Charlie nodded at Casey as he stepped by her. He only gave her a shake of the head and a smile that said he thought she was crazy. She poked her tongue out at him before turning her attention back to the phone in her hand and Nik’s shallow breathing. She wondered if he thought he was dreaming. “Hey babe, how are you?” “I’m okay,” she nodded, honestly. “Really?” He sounded as if he didn’t believe her. “Yes, really. No migraine for nearly a week now.” He huffed, sounding tired. “That’s because I’m not with you, isn’t it?” “Don’t say that,” she admonished softly, her voice tinged with sadness. “It’s true, isn’t it? It’s all my fault you’re sick.” “No, Nik. I have migraines. Sometimes they’re caused by excessive stress. There’s no cause with your photo attached.” “Catherine, please. I’ve caused that stress. Without me, you wouldn’t have felt it.” “Maybe,” she conceded. “Maybe not. Why don’t you open the door and we’ll know for sure?” There was silence on the other end of the phone, though she heard the rumble of his feet race toward the door. Only a second went by before the door swung inward to reveal a barely dressed Nik. He hesitated, blinked rapidly and then stepped into the hall to pull her into his arms. “Jesus,” he breathed in her ear, squeezing her so tight she thought she’d pass out. “You’re here.” Freeing her arms, she wrapped them around his neck and held on while he walked them back into the room. With the door closed and privacy restored, he set her down and looked her over from top to toe. Why did that always make her feel so hot and sexy? “I’m not going anywhere,” she nodded, switching the phone off and throwing it on the bed. “We need to talk. And I only want the truth, buddy, no lies. Don’t shield me from the truth, don’t try and protect me.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser He stood silent, his mouth working but no sound forthcoming. For the first time since she’d met him, Charlie found Nik to be speechless. He looked tired, really exhausted. She noted the hollowed look of his eyes, the ashen skin, the dull hair and decided he hadn’t been looking after himself properly. “You look like crap, Nik.” He only nodded, very slowly. “You scared the hell out of me, lady.” She wanted to go to him, take him in her arms and hold him until they both found each other again. But she wouldn’t, not until she heard the truth from his mouth. The messages were only half way satisfactory and she was determined to let him know he wasn’t getting out of it that easily. “Don’t change the subject,” she demanded, as he had once done. “I want you to tell me why you lied.” “I have not lied to you. I am not married. But I was. A long time ago.” “So you didn’t lie, you just didn’t bother telling me everything. Even after I told you about Gavin and Roger and my father, after I spilled my guts and revealed my fears and weaknesses, you didn’t bother returning that courtesy.” He took a step toward her, held out a hand but didn’t touch her. He seemed scared of doing too much, of making her leave. “I’m sorry, babe,” he offered. “Why?” she demanded. Nik seemed confused. “What do you mean?” “Why didn’t you tell me?” she clarified. “Were you afraid I’d get angry and leave?” “No,” he swallowed. “That wasn’t the reason I didn’t say anything.” “So what was it?” Her voice rose but she controlled it, breathing deeply. Nik swallowed again. “You have to understand, Catherine, it was a long time ago. I hadn’t even turned twenty at that time.” “That doesn’t make it right,” she argued. “That doesn’t mean you should have hidden it from me.” “I didn’t hide it on purpose,” he explained. “I just didn’t think it would have made a difference to you and me.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Charlie blinked. That wasn’t the explanation she was looking for. To his credit, Nik’s expression fell as he realised he’d said the wrong thing. “Shit,” he cussed. “Didn’t you get my messages?” Charlie nodded. “I want to hear you say it,” she said, poking him in the chest. “You owe me that much.” He nodded. “She died so long ago, Catherine. I’ve moved on, dealt with her loss, grieved until I felt it was okay by her that I find another woman to love with all my heart. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. I understand now that I should have but,” he paused, unsure. “But, what?” Her encouragement animated him. He stepped right up to her, chest to chest, as his eyes lightened and his face lifted. “But I was so taken by you, so totally consumed by everything about you that it didn’t occur to me to tell you.” Charlie stood in silence for a moment, his confession shaking her to the core. “I trusted you, Nik, trusted you enough to tell you about Roger, about the things I feared. Didn’t you trust me enough to tell me about her?” “Yes.” He rested his hands on each of her shoulders and gazed at her with eyes so full of love she couldn’t turn away. “Oh Cat,” he sighed. “I wish you could believe me when I say that I overlooked the importance of telling you about Penny. You see, she was the first woman to show me what love is but it was such a young love, the love of two teenagers who only see their own needs. If it wasn’t for her, I would never have been able to fall in love with you.” “I don’t understand Nik.” “Penny taught me how to love, how to be the man I am. She taught me to look beyond my needs and put other’s needs ahead of my own. Her death threatened to rip my heart out but now, I realise it leaves room for more love. That was why I never told you, because only you mattered to me. You were right when you accused me of wanting to fix the damage that Roger and Gavin and your father had caused.” He paused to take a deep breath but plunged ahead before she could interrupt. “You’re not her replacement,” he explained. “I don’t think of you as Penny. You are completely Catherine to me. You’re the only woman I see when I close my eyes. When I make love to you, it’s you I see, you I want to be with.” “And yet,” she said angrily, “you walked out.” “No,” he snapped firmly. “I didn’t walk out. I walked away because my being near you was hurting you. When I heard you were in hospital, when I learned what happened and that maybe I was somehow the cause of it, I prayed to God to protect you and look out
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser for you. I made a deal that if He kept you safe, then I’d do whatever it took to keep you that way. If that meant I had to walk away from us to prevent any further stress, then I would.” “What’s the difference between walking out and walking away Nik? I see them as one and the same.” “No,” he pleaded, squeezing her shoulders gently, seemingly to urge her to try and understand. “They’re not the same. Walking out means giving up, banishing someone from your heart, and having no intention of going back. Walking away leaves room for that return, for coming back.” She had never thought of it that way, never had a reason to. When he explained it like that, it made things seem simpler, easier, and calmed the raging questions in her head. “So you were going to come back to me? Is that what you’re saying?” The anger in her voice was gone, replaced by the tiniest ray of hope. It lightened Nik’s expression and brought a gentle smile to his lips. “Yes. I just didn’t know how to do that without hurting you. You see, Catherine, I was falling for you. With everything I am and with everything that I have, I want you, and only you. You know everything there is to know about me. I know all I’ll ever need to know about you. The trouble is, I didn’t know if coming back to you would bring on more migraines. I couldn’t do that to you.” His words soothed her, left her feeling like she was the only woman he could ever love. “I’m not allergic to you, Nik,” she said softly. He chuffed and shook his head. “It felt like it. But honey, I’m not going anywhere. You’ve got me, hook, line and sinker. I’m not the kind of man who flits from one woman to another. I’m a one-woman man. I’d like that woman to be you.” Speechless was an understatement for the way she felt. No man had ever declared so vigorously that he loved her, and it went a long way to healing past wounds. She remembered thinking he hadn’t wanted a white picket fence and a labra-doodle. Had he changed his mind? Had she? Having him in her life, even for such a short time, had changed her forever. She wasn’t as scared of letting someone into her heart anymore. Hell, she was ready to embrace it. “So what are you saying then?” she challenged, daring him to say the words he knew she would fear. To her surprise, Nik picked her up and took her to the bed. Laying her down, he nestled beside her, resting his solid, steady head on her chest for a long time. When she’d had
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser enough of waiting and was about to demand an answer, he raised his head and hugged her close. “I love you, Catherine Brown. I want you in my life, forever if that’s possible. I want to be the father of your children, your husband, your best friend, your soul mate. I have always believed that I’d find a woman to love again and I know I’ve found her in you. I want that white picket fence, the labra-doodle. But hell, I want more. I want it all, with you.” “Are you trying to scare me?” she asked with a steady voice unmarked by any trace of true fear. He shook his head. “Not intentionally. You asked me what I wanted, what I was saying, and now you have it. I know it scares you, I know it goes against everything you’ve come to believe about love and relationships, but I’m living proof that it can work, Cat. Will you give it a chance?” Holding the smile at bay for a moment longer, Charlie studied his tired face. A tiny speck of fear in his eyes led her to believe he wasn’t completely convinced he could win her over. Rather than disappoint her, it delighted her because it meant he wasn’t being arrogant or cocky. He’d learned enough about her to know she was still her own woman, that she could still say no and leave him in the lurch. But so much of the love in his eyes told her he wouldn’t give up, he’d pursue her to the ends of the earth to have her in his life, and that was the part she liked so much. Nicholas St. Eve was no physical threat to her. He’d proven that every time he’d made love to her, every time he touched her. And more and more, it was becoming clear he didn’t want to be an emotional threat to her. By laying his heart on the line, risking everything he had for one chance, he’d shown her he was worth fighting for, worth risking mind-numbing migraines for. The need she felt to have him in her life, the desire she felt every time he was near, let her know that what she was feeling was true. The fact she’d been able to open her heart to him, to share with him all the horrors without being ridiculed, showed her that she wasn’t an empty shell devoid of emotion. “I want to share my life with you,” she whispered, cradling his face and pressing her lips to his. “I want you to know all my fears, my hopes, my dreams. I want to know all of yours.” As if sensing her need to be touched, he took her in his arms, his fingers gently rubbing the exposed skin at her hip. “I never meant to hurt you.” “I know,” she sighed, pressing her cheek to his. “I know, baby.” Pulling back just enough so she could look in his eyes, she smiled. “I can’t imagine waking up without seeing you right beside me. Being away from you this last week?” She shook her head, finally giving in to all the romantic notions and fairytales she had so desperately wanted to believe in since her father left. “It almost killed me.”
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “I love you, Catherine,” he said firmly, strongly. “I will always be here for you. You know that, don’t you? I could never leave you, ever.” Holding his gaze, her chin trembled slightly. Not in fear, but in the hope that her happilyever-after could come true with the man in her arms. “I love you, Nik.” He smiled. “You can count on me, Cat, I promise. Because I’m sure that if I do hurt you again, I’ll have Casey, Rachel, you, the rest of your band, your fans and my fans chasing me for the rest of my life.” Chuckling, Charlie nodded. “Oh, you bet your ass on it, Nik. Now, no more talk of hurt. I’ve been away from you for far too long.” ~ As the American summer drew to a close, both Mystique and Tantaliser put on blazing final shows. First, Tantaliser threw a free bash in New York’s Madison Square Garden. The only thing one needed to present at the door was a copy of any of their albums. Needless to say, it was a packed house when the boys finally stepped on stage. Afterwards, Nik described the atmosphere as electric and Charlie couldn’t agree more, because when she led Mystique out onto the stage halfway through the night, she felt it too. Naturally, as was becoming a regular feature in the tabloids, they made the frontpage news. Only this time, the paparazzi finally had something worth telling. “Nik and Charlie - Together at Last” read one headline. There were dozens like it as they announced to their fans that they were indeed in love. The night was a roaring success, prompting at least one tabloid to raise the question of whether the two bands would continue playing live together. It certainly proved for interesting conversation around the breakfast table the following morning, with everyone—all eleven of them—having their say. Seven days later, on a sandy beach in LA, Mystique put on their final performance. An open-air concert, unusual for the American scene, left Charlie certain they would do more of them. With the salty spray of the ocean in the air, the sun setting to the west and everyone having an enjoyable night, she gave her American fans something to remember. Of course, as night fell around them, Charlie sprang the sweetest surprise on the audience, inviting Nik, Casey, Skeet, Jason and Brooksy up on stage to jam with them. Just as they had done in New York, Tantaliser and Mystique partied into the night. And just as they had done in New York, Charlie and Nik closed the show with a duet of “All Night Long”. So when all was said and done, the party noise finally silenced and the last fan seen safely home, Tantaliser and Mystique finished their American summer tour. Oh, they
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser promised they’d be back soon enough, but for now, everyone needed a very long holiday. It was strange to think they’d all been on the road so long, and even stranger for Charlie to think Nik had planned Tantaliser’s US tour after he learned the itinerary for Mystique. No two guesses how he’d gotten that information. Not that Charlie minded anymore, because when push came to shove, the end result was far sweeter than she could ever have hoped for. When the plane carrying rock stars, managers and road crews finally landed on Australian soil, it was no secret there would be no work done. While Skeet and Jason had flown directly to London to catch up with loved ones, Brooksy was determined to spend the Australian summer surfing every beach he could find. Anna and Dede were due to jet off to a nice, sun-drenched island resort where they could work on their tans, while Tory intended to slip right back into her old job. Charlie promised to visit at least once. Nancy announced that she was flying down to Melbourne to return to her family, though not before giving Nik a very long lecture about truth and honesty and the need for lots and lots of romance. As for Casey and Rachel, their plans had been kept secret, much to the dismay of almost everyone. But it was true, they needed to take a good, long hard look at their on-again, off-again relationship and they could only do that in private. But no one was going anywhere until Nik and Charlie made their union official. Invitation by stealth, Nik called it, as he summoned each person to a ‘surprise’ party to be held later in the week. The ‘surprise’, as he referred to it, wasn’t for Charlie as he explained, but was for them all. Charlie had barely kept a straight face as he gave each of them a warning, “Miss the party, and I’ll come a-knocking.” Okay, so he could be melodramatic, but everyone seemed to take his warning very seriously. Leaving the airport in a taxi and heading straight for the apartment block, Charlie snuggled into Nik’s arms. Jetlag was creeping up on her and if the taxi driver didn’t hurry it along, she was sure to be asleep by the time they eventually got there. “Don’t you fall asleep on me, girl,” he warned softly, stroking her face and pushing the hair out of her eyes. “We’ve got a lot to do before Saturday.” Nodding sleepily, Charlie tilted her face toward him. “I know, but jetlag can be such a downer.” He smiled, exhaled and cupped her chin in his soft hand. “Do you think any of them know?” She shook her head. Oh sure, the others suspected that eventually, sooner or later, she and Nik would tie the knot. But she was certain no one expected them to do it so soon. She smiled. She wasn’t the kind of girl who did the expected. Nik wasn’t the kind of guy that did the expected. Boy, were they going to knock everyone’s socks off.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser “No one suspects a thing.” He eyed her warily. “Not even Rachel?” “Especially Rachel,” she said with a nod. “But I’m glad we’re doing this, Nik.” “Me too,” he sighed softly. “Me too, baby. I can’t wait to make you my wife.” For once in her life, Charlie didn’t question her decision. Partly because it was hers to make, and partly because she’d shed the suspicious, suspecting Charlie of old. But mostly because it felt right. In the weeks since declaring she loved him, she’d had enough time to realise that life without Nik wasn’t an option. They hadn’t been apart in that time, sharing hotel rooms and beds with the intimacy of an old married couple. At least, that was how Nik described it because quite frankly, Charlie didn’t know how an old married couple acted. She’d never been around one and she’d made damn certain of telling him that. He hadn’t laughed at her and he hadn’t been frightened off by her conviction she didn’t know how to behave like a newly married woman either. He’d only messed up her hair and told her marriage would look good on her, whatever that meant. When the taxi finally dropped them off at the tall, shiny new building housing their two bedroom apartment, Charlie couldn’t help but gaze up at the white structure. Their apartment had a balcony overlooking Bondi beach but as yet, neither of them had seen it in person. Rich and famous as they were, they could afford to rely on the real estate agent to find them a home base. And, as Nik had so politely put it, if they didn’t like it, then they’d bloody well find one they did. Carrying their bags up to their furnished new home, Nik insisted on carrying her over the threshold. “Aren’t we supposed to do that after we’re married?” He laughed, swinging her up into his arms and kicking the door open. “In my mind babe, we already are.” ~ As Charlie learned, things were never dull with Nik around. First, during the week after returning to Australia and amidst all of the frantically arranged wedding plans, he spent each morning waking her a different way. Charlie felt completely indulged. Slow, gentle massages, long walks on the beach, hot sweaty sex, a surfing lesson neither would ever forget, breakfast in bed. Second, he’d managed to get all of the arrangements done without her help—how, she didn’t think she’d ever know.
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Finally, on the eve of their wedding, before Nik insisted on spending the night at a hotel, he took her to dinner with a special guest. None other than Maureen Fable, who made no bones about the fact that she’d been wrong and that she’d known all along Nik’s wife had died over ten years ago. Not willing to pass up the chance to make the woman squirm, Charlie used every minute of their dinner to grill her and Nik took the opportunity to convince her to write a new article about Charlie. Not that Maureen’s first article, printed after their disastrous first encounter, had been negative. In fact, Maureen had been rather flattering. But Charlie didn’t let that stop her as she instructed Maureen on a few of the finer points of what it took to make it in the world of rock stardom. Alone, with the squirming Maureen out of the way, Nik spent the rest of the evening reminding Charlie that he had the rest of their lives to fill with exciting and definitely notdull events. Charlie only smiled and let him know he’d set a precedent now, one he had to live up to. “Oh,” he sighed wistfully as the clock ticked over to midnight. “I’m sure you’ll let me know when things get a little too boring,” he winked mischievously before raising his glass of sparkling apple cider. “To us, and all the naughty adventures that await.” Charlie smiled, clinking her glass with his before stretching across the table to press her lips to his. Hot and demanding, his lips dragged across hers and left her wondering how she would survive the next sixteen hours without him by her side. “Now Catherine, don’t you do anything rash.” She giggled against his lips. “You know I will.” He groaned with anticipation, though the sound really never left his chest. “Oh I’m counting on it, babe.” The End
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Rose Middleton Tantaliser Blame it on David, the boy who challenged me to a writing contest when we were nine years old. The guidelines were sketchy, and only one rule applied: write as many pages as I could. Silly boy. He obviously didn’t realise how much I loved spinning stories, which up to that point had been done by the spoken word in the playground. Until then, I hadn’t actually written anything down. When I hit twenty five pages, my competitor threw his hands in the air and declared I’d won. I can’t remember the title of that story, nor even any of the characters, but that’s where it all began. I'm an ordinary Australian girl who puts family first and, fortunately or unfortunately, sometimes lets my career take up too much time. A teacher by day, romance writer by night, my life is full of the good things. I write because I'm passionate about it, because it's in my heart. I love the escape, the adventure, and especially the life I live vicariously through my characters. Most of all, I relish the challenge of bringing sensual, delightful and fulfilling romance stories to life.
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This is a publication of Linden Bay Romance www.lindenbayromance.com
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