Heart Of The Storm

HEART OF THE STORM by

Jennifer McKenzie

WHISKEY CREEK PRESS www.whiskeycreekpress.com

Published by WHISKEY CREEK PRESS Whiskey Creek Press PO Box 51052 Casper, WY 82605-1052 www.whiskeycreekpress.com

Copyright © 2007 by Jennifer McKenzie Warning: The unauthorized reproduction or distribution of this copyrighted work is illegal. Criminal copyright infringement, including infringement without monetary gain, is investigated by the FBI and is punishable by up to 5 (five) years in federal prison and a fine of $250,000.

Names, characters and incidents depicted in this book are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental and beyond the intent of the author or the publisher. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the publisher. ISBN 978-1-60313-034-9

Credits Cover Artist: Jinger Heaston Editor: Kate Scott Printed in the United States of America

Dedication To my husband, whose fishing experience and a weird story he told me made this book possible. I love you, Joe.

Prologue God, it stinks in here. Charlene Henderson sat in the blue plastic chair, trying to keep her nose from wrinkling to keep the distaste from her face. The smell of the maximum security jail waiting area was foul and stale. Human sweat, cheap perfume and disinfectant combined to make her first visit with a prisoner memorable, but not in a good way. Looking around, she saw others also waiting to talk to prisoners on visiting day. They looked worn and tired as if they had lost all hope. Charlene tried not to look at anyone directly or fidget in her chair. Most of them were visiting family, loved ones. They were people who cared. The man she was visiting was no loved one of hers. She felt out of place. She noticed her reflection in the bulletproof barrier that kept prisoners locked away from the visitors. A long row of cubicles, each with a phone to speak to the inmate and a sheet of glass set between visitor and prisoner, was the last place she expected to be. It surprised her that the glass was reflective. In it, she saw a tall, curved woman in a green tank top and black tailored pants. She tried to rearrange her features to get rid of the angry scowl twisting her features. Normally, she was the ultra cool administrator who couldn’t be ruffled. Today was different. She sat very still. Her chestnut brown hair was pulled back in a clip and flowed to meet her tank top in natural curls. The only movement she made as she waited for the man she had 1

Heart of the Storm come over three hundred miles to see was to flick some lint off her pants. When the buzzer went off and the door opened, Charlene looked up. Jack Dory was grayer than she remembered. He looked thinner and less threatening than eight years earlier when Charlene had known him. Jack’s legs and hands were shackled. The rasp of the chains clanking rattled Charlene’s nerves, but she kept her face blank. He sat down and pulled the black phone receiver to his ear, moving his long black hair out of the way. Charlene reached for her phone, almost wishing she had a handkerchief as a barrier to touching it. “So, you’re Bull Henderson’s daughter,” Jack Dory said. Charlene almost sighed with impatience since those were almost the exact words he’d used when he met her as a nineteenyear-old. “I’m also Kevin Henderson’s sister, Mr. Dory.” Keep cool, Charlene. Rage and frustration strained inside her. “You’re here about Kevin?” Jack’s tone became strident and his black, scruffy eyebrows rose. Again, Charlene mentally took herself in hand as she felt the anger in her rising. The man was unbelievable. She wanted to reach across the barrier and shake answers out of him. “Yes, Mr. Dory.” Reasonable, Charlene. Stay reasonable. “The Phoenix police called me when they found out that you were one of the missing fishermen on my brother’s boat. You remember The Daughter of Norway, don’t you?” Jack’s muddy brown eyes fell away. “I remember,” he muttered. “The Daughter of Norway disappeared eight years ago on the Bering Sea during king crab season. All five men were thought to be lost. The boat was never recovered. Yet, here you are.” Charlene leaned forward. “Jack Dory, deckhand on The Daughter 2

Heart of the Storm of Norway, lost at sea. Oh, and wanted for first degree murder in California.” Jack Dory didn’t look at her. Charlene wanted to scream at him. Instead, she remained calm, almost casual. “Where are the other members of the crew? Where is my brother?” “They’re dead.” “Are they?” Charlene narrowed her eyes and clutched the phone tightly. “Then tell me, Jack Dory, how did you survive?” “I mean, I think they’re dead.” His eyes were wide and restless and his voice squeaked. That sounded like fear to her. “Let me tell you what your position is right now.” Charlene leaned back in the chair. “You either tell me what happened on The Daughter of Norway eight years ago, or get the death penalty. I have depositions from the families of your two victims. They’re willing to only seek life in prison if you will help me locate where The Daughter of Norway went down.” Go slowly, Charlene. “If you cooperate, you don’t get sent to California to face the death penalty.” She held his gaze. “But if you lie to me, the death penalty is back on the table. You’re going back to California, Jack. It’s up to you whether you go back and wait to die or spend your life in prison.” Jack Dory was silent, his head bent, staring at his feet. Charlene waited. Finally he looked up. “I left them alive. When I got away from them, they were all alive.” His voice was shrill and panicked. Charlene leaned forward. “Where, Jack? Where did you leave them?” “I left them on Big Diomede Island.” Charlene just stared at him for a minute. “That’s impossible,” she said sharply. “That’s miles north of their last known location and it’s across the border in Russia. Kevin wouldn’t take the boat there.” 3

Heart of the Storm “It’s true.” Jack wheezed and whined. “I left them when we ran aground on Big Diomede. Ross and Sean forced the captain to go north toward the Russian border and then the storm hit us.” “Ross Perry and Sean Cowell? The other two deckhands?” “Yeah.” Dory put a shaky hand up to his eyes. “That was the worst night of my life.” “And Jason Iverson? What about him?” “Ross kept a rifle on me and Jason. Sean made your brother keep steering, but there was a storm and the boat got slammed. Jason got hurt and we got blown onto the island.” “Then what?” Charlene forced the words through a tight throat. “Then, Ross pushed us all onto the island and the minute I could, I got in one of the life rafts and took off. I drifted into Little Diomede Village.” Dory clenched his fingers together. “It took me weeks to recover. No one there knew who I was and I didn’t tell them. I told them I fell off a supply boat and got out of there when I could. I was sure that Ross killed Jason and your brother and I didn’t want to be next.” “You left them there to die?” Charlene’s voice was deceptively calm. The rage was building in her. Her brother hadn’t died at sea. He didn’t drown. He’d been murdered. “I don’t know if they died or not,” Dory whined. “What part of Big Diomede, Jack? Could you point it out on a map?” “I guess so.” He didn’t look her in the eye. Charlene pulled out a geological survey map of Alaska and the surrounding islands and pressed it against the glass between them. She pointed to Big Diomede. “Where?” Jack reached his hand up to point and then withdrew it. “How do I know you’ll keep your promise and I won’t get the death penalty?” 4

Heart of the Storm Charlene wanted to pound her fists in frustration but she maintained her control. “You don’t. This is your only offer. If you don’t cooperate with me, the victims’ families get to decide.” Her gaze bored into his. “They aren’t feeling very compassionate at the moment, Jack.” Jack reached up his hand and pointed. Charlene pulled the map down and rolled it up carefully. Dory looked at her. “What about some protection for me? What if those guys find out that I ratted them out? They’ll try and kill me.” Charlene’s eyes went cold. “Once they find out you’re alive, Mr. Dory, they’ll want you dead anyway. That is not my problem.” She began to pick up her purse and put it on her shoulder. “You’ll be in prison. Perhaps they won’t get you there.” She placed the receiver back in place and rose. The panic in Dory’s eyes grew frantic and he put his hands on the glass. “You can’t do that! I helped you! You wouldn’t have known what happened if I didn’t talk.” His muffled voice came through to her. Charlene’s face tightened and she let Dory see the anger and pain she had been hiding. She picked up the phone again. “You left him to die. You’re a coward and a murderer. Saving your skin wasn’t part of the deal. All I promised was that the victims’ families wouldn’t seek the death penalty. I’ve done that. What happens to you in prison is your problem.” Slamming down the phone, she turned and walked away from him. “You’ll be sorry! I know more than I’ll every tell. Your precious brother was no angel.” Charlene ignored the man as he was dragged back to his cell. She waited until she was out in her car before she allowed bitter tears to fall. Oh, Kevin. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. 5

Heart of the Storm

Chapter 1 Ethan Shannon felt out of place at the small airstrip in Dutch Harbor. He wasn’t comfortable around flying and his compact frame squirmed as he watched a Cessna fly in with the cargo he was waiting for. Charlie Henderson. Ten years ago she had been seventeen and hovering on the brink of being very pretty. She had been competitive, loud and a tomboy as a child. Eight years ago, she was a wild beauty who held her own against any other fisherman and matched him passion for passion. What would she be like now? The Cessna’s unique engine whine grew louder and the plane landed. Ethan rose up from the wooden bench he was perched on and saw the plane door drop open. Out stepped Charlie Henderson. Ethan Shannon’s mouth dropped open and he just stared. She had always had messy hair and leaned toward the heavy side. Ethan remembered that he and Kevin had teased Charlie about her extra pounds. He winced at the thought. Charlie had retaliated by calling him short and stubby. Compared to Kevin’s six-four and Jason’s six-two, he was short and stubby. After all, he thought, she had to get back at him somehow. But now… Her descent from the plane was graceful and confident. From this distance, he could see the makeup, the clothes and the luggage that screamed city girl. She was wearing sensible warm boots at least, but that brand new jacket said money and lots of it. 6

Heart of the Storm Brown curls escaped from a clip framing her face. There weren’t a whole lot of extra pounds anymore and, if there were, they were all in the right place. If he hadn’t been expecting her, he would have thought she was one of the many silly female tourists who came to Alaska for the great male to female ratios. She was wearing a blue sweater that was nothing like the ragged clothes she wore as a teenager. The tomboy was nowhere to be seen. What did he expect? Eight years was a lifetime. With bitter humor, he thought about the changes in himself. Staring at the woman standing by the plane, he wondered what eight years had done to him. Would she be the same with him? Or would she be the stranger she appeared to be? Hope warred with bitterness. Ethan shook his head. Charlie was gone and Charlene was here. He sighed. He missed Charlie. He walked across the runway to greet her. **** Sweat gathered on Charlene’s forehead, even as the bitter cold of the Alaskan air hit her for the first time in eight years. Her hand trembled as she grasped the railing along the steps exiting the small airplane. Her legs shook as she stepped off the Cessna and she shot a glance at the pilot as he exited the plane. His face was white. The plane trip had almost been a disaster. She turned to the pilot and shook his hand. “Thank you. I don’t know how you did that, but thank you.” The big, grizzled man grinned at her, his hawk nose and blue eyes crinkling into a broad smile. “Frankly, miss, I don’t know either. I’ll deal with the sheriff. You just go relax and they can look you up later.” As the pilot was speaking, Charlene felt a man approaching them. The feeling was so familiar it was painful. Ethan Shannon. His close proximity reminded her of too much. He still smelled 7

Heart of the Storm the same. There was a faint whiff of diesel combined with a scent all his own. She remembered he was a captain now. He had been youngest captain in the fleet and that was a huge accomplishment. Bitterness rose in her throat. Fishing was always first for all of them despite the loved ones at home. All her life, Charlene had been surrounded by fishermen— her father, her brother, Jason and Ethan himself. In her head, she heard her mother’s voice pushing her to go, get away from ignorant fishermen. Well, she’d done that and it hadn’t made her happy. But it had been her own choice. Her childhood had been tormented by Ethan and Jason Iverson, her brother’s two best friends. She had been Kevin’s tomboy sister and they’d teased her unmercifully. After Kevin was lost at sea, Ethan had become even more. Now, he seemed even more muscular and a little older. He had crow’s feet around his eyes which were still a brilliant green. Straight brown hair and the inevitable stubble on his face gave him a dangerous look. Her first thought was that he always looked tired, just as he did now. Her second thought was that eight years hadn’t diminished his rugged sex appeal. “The sheriff, Don? What happened?” Ethan’s voice was sharp and commanding. Charlene closed her eyes. His voice hadn’t changed much. Memories swamped her. Ethan and Kevin fighting and wrestling. Kevin and Jason celebrating when Kevin got his own boat, The Daughter of Norway. Kevin and Jason competing for Ethan’s little sister’s attention because she was so gorgeous. Ethan’s surprised look when he’d kissed her and she kissed him back. Charlene took a deep breath. “Somebody took a pot shot at the plane as we came in for a landing. They took out part of a wing.” The pilot pointed to the left wing. There was a jagged hole punched through the metal. 8

Heart of the Storm The words somehow made the whole thing more real and frightening. She swallowed down a dry throat. Ethan’s eyes widened. “How, Donny? It didn’t seem like anything was wrong when you landed.” Donny smiled and looked at Charlene. “Everyone calls me ‘Donny’ or ‘Don the Swede’ since no one can pronounce my last name.” He patted her shoulder and turned to Ethan. “That’s because I’ve flown under fire before, son. Somebody put that big hole in the wing. It almost got us both killed.” Ethan’s eyebrows drew together and his green eyes grew stormy. Charlene always hated that look. She remembered that it had always preceded a bunch of orders. She stiffened her spine and reminded herself she was twenty-seven, not thirteen. “Was anyone else on the plane?” Ethan asked both Donny and Charlene. “No, just me.” Charlene tried to steady her voice, but it shook as she spoke. “The threat was against me, Ethan. That’s what Donny is trying to tell you. The person was trying to kill me.” **** Words abandoned Ethan after Charlie dropped her dramatic bomb. All he could do was suggest coffee and walk beside her to the warmth of the nearest building. “Let me carry that.” He reached for her suitcase. “No.” There was a bite to her tone that hadn’t been there before. “I can carry it.” “Why don’t you leave it with Donny? He’ll watch it for you. You need to sit down.” “Some things haven’t changed.” Her voice was faint. “You’re still barking out orders.” He shot a glance at her. In the past, he would have bantered with her, but this woman wasn’t the girl he’d known. While she 9

Heart of the Storm put on a good front, her white face and the tremble in her voice told him she was scared and shaken. In the Dutch Harbor Airport coffee shop, Ethan grabbed a table. As Charlene slid into the seat across from him, he studied her with hooded eyes and tried not to stare. The changes in her were staggering. She wore makeup and had manicured nails. The casual jeans and sweater hid none of the changes in her from Ethan’s eagle eyes. She was stunning. It wasn’t just that she was pretty. She had poise and grace she’d never had when she was young. She also seemed bitter and angry. Her resentment of him was almost palpable. The edge in her voice on the runway and her silence spoke of her shock and her dislike of him. “Are you okay?” He wanted to take her hands in his, but he kept them wrapped around his coffee cup. Comforting her was how they’d ended up strangers in the first place. “I don’t know. How could someone know I was going to be on that plane?” “Maybe they didn’t. Someone may have wanted to kill Donny, you know.” Charlene looked up and some of her color came back into her face. “That’s ridiculous. He flies in and out of here all the time. Why now?” She shook her head. “No, somebody was trying to kill me.” “Okay. I’ll bite. Why would someone want to kill you?” He leaned back, sprawling his arms over the back of the booth. “Because I’m going to find out how Kevin really died. I think somebody doesn’t want me to know.” “What exactly did Dory say?” “He said he left Kevin and Jason on Big Diomede Island.” There was a short silence. Ethan waited for her to continue, but she stayed silent. Her eyes looked haunted, giving her face the look of a cornered doe. 10

Heart of the Storm “What makes you think he was telling the truth?” It seemed unlikely that someone would wait eight years to tell this kind of a story. “He was in jail for murdering a cashier and a bystander. The family agreed to seek life in prison but only if he helped me. If he’s lying, the death penalty will be back on the table.” “Jack Dory is a liar,” he said flatly. “I don’t think he’d lie when his life is on the line.” Doubt crept into her voice. “So, now you think that somebody here, in Dutch Harbor, wants you dead?” Why did a cold knot clench his stomach? This wasn’t Charlie. This was a stranger. Ethan was trying to be reasonable, rational, but found the past rising up to haunt him. Charlene stuck her chin out. “I think the shot at the plane confirms that Dory was telling the truth and Kevin didn’t drown.” “Kevin wouldn’t have taken The Daughter of Norway into Russian waters.” That he knew. Ethan knew his best friend wouldn’t have taken it willingly. All his reason told him this was all just a tempest in a teapot. But his gut was telling him something about all this was very wrong. “According to Dory, Kevin didn’t have a choice.” Charlene’s voice was sad and bitter. “There’s no record of his boat on Big Diomede either.” “I know that.” She pursed her lips and didn’t say more. “What exactly do you plan to do?” “I don’t think that’s any of your business.” Her back straightened and her eyes were cold and distant. Ethan looked into his coffee cup. The questions swirled around his mind, but one was in his heart. He knew he shouldn’t ask her but it came out of his mouth before he could stop it. “Why didn’t you call me, Charlie? Why did you call Dutch, but not me?” 11

Heart of the Storm Charlene winced at the nickname. “I called Dutch because he was Dad’s best friend and he has a boat. I need a boat.” Just like that. No emotion, like he didn’t matter at all. Ethan’s heart twisted. “Which still doesn’t answer my question, Charlie. Why didn’t you call me? I was Kevin’s best friend. Didn’t I have the right to know that Dory turned up alive?” Ethan was more bewildered than angry. Kevin was my best friend, and you were even more. Charlene gritted her teeth. “Stop calling me ‘Charlie’. I didn’t call you because I don’t know who to trust anymore, Ethan.” A deadly silence followed. Charlene couldn’t look him in the eye. They both knew why she didn’t trust him. Ethan looked down at his calloused hands clenched on the table. Bitter anger stuck in his throat. The past wasn’t dead. He’d hoped it was, that the feelings between them had passed. Lifting his eyes, he scanned her face for something, anything that remained of the warmth he once knew in her. Finally, she squirmed in her seat and impatiently pushed her coffee cup away. “You weren’t even supposed to know I was here, Ethan. No one was.” She tapped her nails on the table and looked out the window. “You know better than that. You called Dutch. Whatever Dutch knows, he tells Donny. Whatever Donny knows, Dutch Harbor knows. It was all over the docks yesterday.” Ethan reached over and grabbed her hand. Her eyes flew to his face. “What I don’t understand is why you didn’t tell me about Dory.” “Don’t touch me.” Her hands fluttered like captured shore birds. The look on her face said it all. There was no warmth there for him. Whatever had been between them was dead.

12

Heart of the Storm He let go of her hand almost flinging it away. “Okay. You don’t trust me. You hate me. You and I both know that what’s between us has nothing to do with Kevin.” She closed her eyes. The memory of their last encounter lay between them. “It had everything to do with Kevin.” She seemed to force the words out. “It started with his death. It began when I wanted to help you.” Ethan’s blood boiled and his fists clenched. Resentments he thought he’d forgotten were right on the surface. “It began when you screwed me.” Ethan glared at her. “I made love to you.” “I was a mess. You took advantage of me and then when I thought it meant something—” She stopped. “Go ahead, Charlie. Finish it. You’ve wanted to blame me for a long time now. Tell me why you ran away. Tell me why you left your parents and me and went to L.A.” Ethan’s voice was harsh and cold. Charlene looked at him as if she was surprised. Apparently, he wasn’t supposed to be resentful that the woman he’d loved had left him. “When I thought it meant something, you told me that fishing was more important.” There. It was said. Ethan’s eyes narrowed on her face. “So, because I wouldn’t give up fishing, my life’s work, you left all of us without a word.” “I was nineteen. It seemed reasonable at the time.” Her eyes dropped from his. “I see.” He seethed, but tried to keep his voice calm. Charlene squirmed. “I left a letter.” “For your parents!” Ethan exploded. He leaned forward across the table and pointed a finger at her. “You ran. You’re still running.” He got up and threw some money on the table. “When you’re ready to admit that, I’ll be around. Dutch doesn’t have a boat anymore, Charlie. It’s mine. I own it and I’m the captain. 13

Heart of the Storm You want a boat? You’ll have to trust me.” He turned his back and walked away. **** Charlene sat at the table stunned. He sounded as hurt as she felt. The bitterness between them surprised her. After all, it had been eight years. Even as that thought passed through her mind, she recognized her lie. The time apart from the ocean, the fishing and Ethan Shannon hadn’t made her resentments and fears go away. In fact, she’d sustained them in the face of the truth. She knew now that he’d made the right choice. If he had given up fishing for her, given up the sea, he would have been miserable. Genuine love wants happiness for someone. Damn! For years she’d hung onto her resentment of Ethan and fishing. Associating them both with the loss of her brother and the death of her father a month later, Charlene cut them out of her life. She made herself believe that Ethan was responsible for the failed relationship since he wouldn’t compromise. There was no way to avoid the past here. She needed a boat to find her brother. Trying to get on board with a different captain seemed impossible. Ethan was her best hope. And her biggest fear. In reality, she had been a selfish nineteen-year-old. She sighed. She was older now and knew better. Love didn’t demand sacrifice. Then, she’d wanted him to prove that he loved her. Later, it seemed her chance to come home and pick up the pieces had passed. She had convinced herself that she was better off without her childhood home, the Bering Sea and crab fisherman. Yet, had she really been better off? A mature woman would have cleaned all this up years ago, but Charlene shut that precious part of her life away and wouldn’t deal with it. Until now. But trust Ethan? 14

Heart of the Storm She sighed again. What else could she do? And he was right. She ran from everything back then. There’s nothing worse than being young and foolish. The fact that Ethan had been right made it even more painful. It was time to stop running and eat crow.

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Heart of the Storm

Chapter 2 Captain Shannon was fuming. Philip “Pogie” Crane had eyed him when Ethan came aboard, cautiously recognizing the simmering anger. The captain was famous for his reckless chances and his astounding luck but he was also known for being tough on a crew. Pogie knew a black cloud brewing when he saw it. Men of the sea always knew when a storm was coming. Seeing the crew nervously eying the wheelhouse, Pogie decided to take the storm head on. The Celtic Rose was as much his responsibility as the captain’s, and keeping the crew in line was his job. As Ethan’s friend, he often ripped the captain apart to keep the other men from killing him. He raised his eyes to the wheelhouse and flicked a cigarette over the side. Pogie felt the eyes of the rest of the four-man crew watching as he went up the ladder to the captain’s lair to beard the lion. When Pogie knocked on the door and walked into the wheelhouse, Ethan sat in the captain’s chair listening to the radio updating the weather forecast. His green eyes glittered with anger and frustration. Pogie got right to the point. “All right, Skipper. Spill it.” The deckhand pulled a cigarette out and lit it. He handed it to Ethan who took a drag. He lit another one, still waiting for Ethan to let loose. The man was brooding. The man was suffering. “You can’t stay holed up in here.” Pogie took a drag and sat down in the only other chair in the wheelhouse. 16

Heart of the Storm Ethan stared at his lit cigarette and said nothing. Pogie sighed. “Look, Ethan. All the men know that Charlie came back. We all know she asked Dutch for the boat. From the looks of things, I’d say that you had a run in with her and it didn’t go well.” Smoke drifted from Ethan’s cigarette and he shifted slightly in his chair. Pogie waited him out. “She’s a cidiot.” Pogie snorted at the word. Ethan had made it up to refer to people moving to Alaska from urban areas, and bringing with them fast driving, fast living and corporate coffee houses. “Charlie grew up on the docks.” “She’s changed.” Ethan looked grim. “You can’t change that much, Ethan. No matter how much polish she puts on and what fancy names she calls herself, she’s still Charlie Henderson.” Pogie shoved himself out of his chair. “She loved you. She hated fishing. Loving a fisherman isn’t every woman’s cup of tea, Ethan. You and I both know she had a little help making some of those choices. That was a long time ago. Right now she needs you.” He started toward the stairs. “Just to let you know, the men voted. None of us believe the crap that a woman on board is bad luck.” With that parting shot, Pogie left the captain to his own thoughts. **** Ethan didn’t want his own thoughts. He was in the past. He was holding Charlie’s hand as she sobbed for her brother. He remembered how her eyes had filled with tears and his surprised discovery they were brown. How had he missed how beautiful she was? He remembered the wonder he felt when he discovered he wanted her, needed her. Stabbing out his dead cigarette, the anger returned. All the pain that twisted his guts when she begged him to walk away from fishing returned. The emptiness when he found her gone 17

Heart of the Storm after a three-week trip felt fresh. Why did he think she would wait? She’d made herself clear. Ethan had to choose between her and fishing. Even though in the end, he’d chosen fishing and made a life for himself, he’d never wanted another woman. Charlie was his ideal and his nemesis. She’d ruined him for any other woman and fishing took care of the rest. His sister Kelly was the only woman in his life and the only family he had left. The loneliness was difficult, but Ethan was a high line captain. He worked and planned and worked more. His crew was the best and he brought in big numbers. Charlie was gone now. Charlene Henderson replaced her. A woman who got a French manicure every week wouldn’t be a crab fisherman’s wife. She smelled exactly the same, though. Closing his eyes he could almost smell the lavender scent that wafted from her skin. Ethan heard a commotion on deck. He looked out the side window to the docks. Charlene Henderson was coming aboard. **** Charlene pulled into the parking lot next to the docks. It seemed frozen in time. There were the stacks of crab pots waiting to be loaded. The smell of salt and fish in the air invaded her nostrils and brought back so many memories. The Bering Sea churned and boiled, rocking the boats moored in the docks. In the distance, she heard the buoy markers calling across the inlet. Coming to the docks was difficult. Charlene spotted The Celtic Rose instantly. A dragger as well as a crab boat, she was gleaming white with navy blue trim. The crab pots were already loaded and weighed the boat down until the deck was almost level to the dock. There was a flurry of activity on the deck as the crew anchored the pots for the long trip out to the fishing grounds. 18

Heart of the Storm As Charlene was climbing aboard The Celtic Rose, she wondered if Ethan would kick her off. He was undoubtedly in the wheelhouse, which dominated the bow. She looked up to the windows that faced the deck knowing he could see her. Across the deck a huge older man in a stained ball cap and orange overalls pulled off a glove and reached out his hand. “You must be Charlene Henderson. I’m Pogie Foster. I knew your dad.” The big giant shook her hand. His hand was rough and dwarfed hers. “Ethan is up in the wheelhouse. Go easy on him.” “Go easy on him?” she said. “He’s more likely to rip me up.” Pogie’s blue eyes twinkled. “Nah. He’s up there brooding. Bet he’ll be putty in your hands.” Charlene would have laughed at that comment, but thought she might offend Pogie. He walked her toward the stairs and waved at her as she started toward the wheelhouse. It was one of the toughest set of steps she’d ever climbed. Charlene saw Ethan sitting in the captain’s chair. He looked right. She could only see his profile, but he seemed intent on the charts in front of him. Just the way his hands rested on the dash told her he was completely at ease. This was his home. How could she have asked him to walk away from this? It was what he knew and loved. The silence stretched between them as she searched for the right words. Ethan finally looked at her. “Well?” Spit it out, Charlene. “I was wrong.” Her hands twisted together in front of her and she shuffled her feet. He waited and didn’t respond. Charlene’s stomach ached. She took a deep breath and reminded herself that she was Bull Henderson’s daughter. “I was wrong to make you choose. When you chose to fish, I thought you didn’t love me. You were my first and I thought it meant everything. I didn’t realize you had your own hopes and 19

Heart of the Storm dreams.” A bitter smile twisted her lips. “I believed I was your hope and dream. I ran away because I felt so hurt and foolish.” She looked up to try and read what he was thinking. His green eyes were steady and his face was unreadable. “You were part of my hopes and dreams.” She couldn’t read his tone. Was he sad? Was he angry? “I didn’t know that.” “You didn’t wait to find out.” “What do you want me to say, Ethan? I was nineteen.” “You listened to your mother.” “I thought—” She started to say she thought he would come after her. It wasn’t the reason she left, but it was shattering when he didn’t. “You thought what?” he asked. Charlene decided there was no way she was admitting how truly pathetic she’d been at nineteen. “I thought you’d be over all this by now.” Suddenly he rose from his chair and stood in front of her. The urge to take a step back grew but she suppressed it. She would stand her ground. He was still so imposing. He only stood four inches taller than her, but his wide shoulders and muscular arms gave him a powerful aura. Would he touch her? What would she do after all these years? No one else had inspired the passion Ethan Shannon brought out of her those first times. In her ignorance, she hadn’t known at nineteen, that their passion was unusual. No man since then had touched her and brought fire to her veins. Would it be the same now? He brought his calloused hand up and brushed a strand of her hair that escaped from the ball cap she wore. Just that touch scorched her and she almost cried out in surprise. His eyes stayed on her face and he finally spoke. “I shouldn’t have touched you. You were young and hurting.” “I needed you, Ethan.” 20

Heart of the Storm His face softened and for a moment, Charlene saw the man whose shoulder she’d sobbed on. The same compassion was on his face. Nothing has changed. The thought rocketed through her. I love him and I always will. He loves fishing and he always will. She reached up to touch his face but he stopped her, gripping her hand and setting it away from him. The look of compassion was gone. His eyes glittered and the hard planes of his face were tight. “No, Charlie. Don’t.” Her eyes stared into his. “But—” “I won’t be manipulated that way.” He dropped her hand and turned his back to her. Charlene’s hands clenched into fists as she struggled to regain her balance. What just happened? “What are you talking about?” He flung his large frame into the captain’s chair and pulled out a cigarette. The lighter made a “clink” sound as he flipped it open, the flame hissing in the silence between them. Through a stream of smoke, his gaze bored into hers. “You can hitch a ride on The Celtic Rose, Charlene. You’ll cook for the crew and we’ll find time to check out Dory’s story. You don’t have to screw me to get that.” “I don’t remember offering to screw you for anything, Ethan.” The laugh from Ethan didn’t have any humor in it. “Sure.” He turned away and began to study the charts laid out in front of him. “I’m doing it for Kevin. You don’t have to worry about me. I’ll keep my hands to myself this time.” A myriad of feelings rushed through Charlene. Anger, fear and relief were all mixed up with disappointment. She stuck her chin up and stood her ground. “All right, Ethan. I’ll cook for the crew.” Anger was the emotion she ran 21

Heart of the Storm with. She crossed over to him and swiveled his chair to face her with both hands on the armrests. “I don’t screw men so they’ll do what I want, Ethan. Let’s get that straight now. If I wanted to sleep with you, I’d let you know.” He leaned back and smiled. She wanted to slap it off his face. “I’d say you send out definite signals that you do want to sleep with me.” His tone was insolent and condescending. He put his cigarette out in an ashtray. She gritted her teeth. “I’d say you have a big ego.” She started to pull back from him when his hand snaked out and grabbed her around the waist. “Let’s see.” Charlene found herself yanked against his chest and straddling one of his legs. With one sharp movement he pulled her hat off and her hair spilled over her shoulders. She only had a moment to catch her breath when he forced her head close to his and his lips slammed on hers. Molten heat spread through her limbs and her hands reached out to find something to hold and found his thick hair instead. He smelled of coffee and cigarettes, which, for some reason, turned her on. One of his hands twisted in her hair, which brought an involuntary groan from her throat. His other arm was a vise around her waist holding her against him. The desire that lay just beneath the surface since she’d seen him again consumed her. This kiss was different than the ones eight years earlier. There was anger and passion mixed together. Her own reaction to him was immediate and nothing like the innocence of their time before. She tumbled down into his kiss and felt her body molding to his. Heat spread through her as he deepened the kiss, caressing the inside of her mouth with his tongue. She opened her mouth rubbing her lips roughly against his. Slowly, he ended the kiss and pulled away slightly to look at her. 22

Heart of the Storm His green eyes glittered and his lips were a breath away from hers. “I don’t think it’s my ego, do you?” Humiliation washed over her. She jerked her body away from him and rubbed the back of her hand against her lips. She picked up her discarded ball cap. Tears burned her throat but she desperately kept them out of her voice. “No, you’ve made your point.” She looked anywhere but his face. “Am I to understand that this will be a regular part of my job?” The bite of sarcasm sharpened her voice. Ethan was very still. “No. That was a one-time deal. I told you I’ll keep my hands to myself.” He swung his chair away and turned his back to her. “Just stay out of my way. I’ll get you where you want to go.” His voice was harsh and gritty. She lifted a hand to touch him, reach him. Her hand dropped to her side. What was the point? Nothing had changed really. She turned and left the wheelhouse. Stepping down the outside ladder from the wheelhouse, Charlene was shaken and hurt. She reached the deck and found four men lounging on the deck. The man who called himself Pogie approached her. Now that her confrontation with Ethan was over, she studied the older deckhand more carefully. He was taller than Ethan and thinner. His face was crisscrossed with lines and his hands were huge and calloused. “Well, looks like you survived. Are you our new cook?” His voice was gravelly and deep. It sounded as if he smoked too many cigarettes and drank too much whiskey. “It looks like it.” She managed a weak smile. “You better meet the guys, then.” He pointed to a young kid who looked fresh out of high school. “That’s Jamie. He’s our greenhorn and our ladies man. Charming, that’s our Jamie Tyler. I’d say it’s blarney but he isn’t Irish, he’s Norwegian.” 23

Heart of the Storm The kid stepped forward and with a brilliant smile, he shook Charlene’s hand. “This is only my second trip, so we’re both kind of new.” His curly blonde hair stuck out in tufts under his knit cap. Pogie snorted. “She knows more about crab fishing than you’ll forget, greenhorn.” Jamie just laughed. Cupping his hand, Pogie lit another cigarette and pointed a finger toward a dark, short man sitting quietly on a barrel. “That’s Gabriel Hernandez. He’s from El Salvador and works harder than any of us. How many trips is this for you, Gabe?” “This is only my fourth on The Celtic Rose, but I was on The Northern Light for two years.” His voice was quiet and he spoke perfect English. His black eyes studied her, but she didn’t feel uncomfortable with his perusal. Pogie pulled Charlene over to the last man rather than point. “This is Cal Hendricks. Now, Cal is good to know. He’s the engineer, the financial wizard and high liner expert. He’s aiming for Ethan’s chair.” His laugh was gruff and loud. “Well, maybe not Ethan’s chair. He’d like his own boat though, right, Cal? Problem is that he’s got a smart mouth.” “A smart mouth is better than nothing.” Cal was handsome and built. He shook Charlene’s hand and lingered over the rest of her before he met her eyes. She knew an expression of interest when she saw it. Pogie laughed. “Well, it didn’t help you much when you pissed off that captain in the bar last season.” Cal smiled at Pogie, but kept his eyes on Charlene. “I was drinking.” “And writing checks your butt couldn’t cover.” “That’s why I keep you around, Pogie. You keep me from getting killed.” His smile was full of meaning as he directed it 24

Heart of the Storm toward Charlene. “Don’t give this lady the wrong idea. I’m a great guy, with a great future.” Before she could respond, Cal’s blue eyes looked over her shoulder and lost their shine. Charlene turned around and almost ended up in Ethan’s arms for the second time that day. With her nose to his chest, she couldn’t see his expression, but his body language said irritated. “Are you done getting the boat ready?” Ethan’s voice was rough and loud in Charlene’s ear, his eyes scanning his crew. “We only have three days until the season starts. Let’s not fool around.” She looked up and saw him glaring at Cal. Surely he wasn’t angry because Cal was flirting with her, was he? Charlene had mixed feelings about that. It rankled that the engineer would quit flirting with her because of the captain’s glare, but she got a warm feeling that Ethan would glare at a man for showing interest in her. And how twisted was that? The crew moved quickly to look busy. Charlene saw Pogie shrug his shoulders and head for the galley just beneath the wheelhouse. Ethan turned his glare on her. “You’re going to need warmer clothes than you’ve got on now.” “I know that.” She glared back at him and tried to catch her breath. His nearness sent her pulse pounding. Great. Just great. The guy thinks I’ll sleep with him for a berth and he gets me hot by glaring at me. “Good. We have a lot to do. The Coast Guard inspection is day after tomorrow. You need to be able to get in a survival suit in under a minute.” He stepped back a bit. “Think you can still do it?” She raised her eyebrows and gasped. “Of course not, Ethan. I’ve been landlocked for eight years.” She headed to the side of the boat. “Don’t worry. I’ll practice until I get it.” 25

Heart of the Storm Ethan strode toward the wheelhouse ladder. “Damn right you will. I’ll leave you on shore if you can’t pass. Nobody rides if they can’t be safe.” Charlene sighed.

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Chapter 3 The worst was over. Charlene couldn’t help but breathe a little easier now that Ethan was going to have her on his boat. Now, she came to another tough hurdle. The Home Anchor Boarding House. One of Charlene’s oldest friends was Barbara Kanook who owned the small boarding house in Dutch Harbor. Related to the Inuit Indians who were scattered all over Alaska, she provided both practical provisions and impractical advice to all who stayed in her home. Charlene’s father had stayed there as a deckhand. Kevin had also stayed there as a deckhand. No one knew how old Barbara was and she wasn’t telling, but she’d been around a long time. All of Dutch Harbor knew if you wanted a good meal and advice, go to Barbara’s place. If you were looking for something fancy, with chintz pillows and fresh flowers, go to Juneau. For Charlene, Barbara had been the warm, loving mother missing from her home. Eight years ago, Charlene had walked away. Now it seemed selfish to have left and not stayed in contact. As she drove up the familiar road, memories flicked through her mind. It was Barbara who’d loved her and listened to her in those difficult, awkward teenage years, not her mother. Charlene’s childhood was full of Barbara’s love, given freely. It’d filled the aching void that Charlene’s mother left inside. Yet, when Charlene ran from her home, she couldn’t call or write Barbara. It had been too painful. 27

Heart of the Storm Walking up the worn, brightly painted porch, dread clutched her stomach. Barbara was uncanny sometimes and the last thing Charlene wanted was a mind reader. The petite owner opened her door and Charlene found herself wrapped in a bear hug that took the breath out of her. The dread slipped away. “Welcome home, baby girl.” She felt tears gathering in her eyes. “I missed you, Maw maw.” Everyone called Barbara ‘Maw maw’, which was another word for “mama”, as she was like a mother to a lot of fishermen and their kids. Those black eyes stared into hers. “I never go nowhere.” Charlene had forgotten about Barbara’s broken English. It was one of her stubborn habits. Everyone knew Barbara could speak perfectly correct English if she wanted, but she didn’t. Charlene was convinced it was a game Barbara played so people would underestimate her and she’d have the upper hand. She was a woman of warmth and stubbornness in a compact, solid package. A tear slid down Charlene’s cheek. “I’m sorry.” It was a whisper. There were so many people she just walked away from and didn’t look back. Facing them was difficult, but also healing in a way. Barbara nodded, almost as if she followed Charlene’s thoughts. “You home now. The past is past.” And with those words, Charlene really felt she was home. **** Bright and early the next morning, Charlene showed up at The Celtic Rose ready for anything. At least, she thought she was. The sunlight was muted and the October wind felt bitterly cold. Her sweats were flannel-lined and she wore sensible boots. Unfortunately, her boots were new, so her feet were already starting to throb as they were pinched and squeezed. Her coat 28

Heart of the Storm was a heavy lined raincoat with a hood and fit loosely over her hooded sweatshirt. Confident she was ready, she hopped aboard The Celtic Rose. Pogie was on the deck checking line and wrapping it neatly in coils. “Am I the second one here?” she asked hopefully. The deckhand stood up slowly, unbending and stretching to straighten his back. “Nope. Ethan’s up in the wheelhouse. I was here about an hour ago. Cal was here, but I sent him on shore for a few engine parts. Did you stay at Barbara’s last night?” Charlene nodded. “Yes. Barbara was one of my family’s oldest friends. She’s been around forever.” With a cigarette now between his fingers, Pogie smiled broadly. “I love that place. I stayed there pretty regularly until I found out a pretty widow was running The Whaler’s Inn.” Charlene grinned. “Really? And what did Barbara say to that?” Pogie grimaced. “You don’t want to know.” Laughing, Charlene started for the galley. “I’d better get to work.” “Before you get to work—” Charlene spun around as Ethan climbed down the ladder from the wheelhouse. She almost groaned as she got a great view of his perfect butt. “—you need to start training to get into your survival suit.” “I haven’t even had a cup of coffee yet. Can’t it wait?” Ethan’s smile was cold. “It can wait forever as far as I’m concerned.” She glared at him, knowing he was implying he didn’t want her on the boat. If she didn’t pass the survival suit test, she wouldn’t be. “Fine. Where do you guys drill?” Disgruntled, she stepped back toward the deck. 29

Heart of the Storm “Right here will do.” Without missing a beat, he whipped out a digital stopwatch and slung the chord around his neck while he held the clock in his hand. “You brought a suit, didn’t you?” “Of course I did.” She didn’t mention that she hadn’t even sized it yet to make sure it fit. “Well?” His green eyes challenged her and she felt her temper getting the best of her. “It’s in my car. You’ll have to wait.” She turned and left the boat. Grumbling, she hauled the heavy survival suit out of her trunk. A lot of boats had standard survival suits, but Charlene had always purchased her own because of the size difference. She crossed her fingers. Hopefully the darn thing would fit. Tossing the suit on the deck, she hopped back aboard and faced Ethan. “Okay. I’m ready.” Ethan looked at the stopwatch and said, “Go!” It was one of the most humiliating experiences to struggle and fight with a survival suit as Ethan’s eyes followed her movements. When she finally crammed her body into the suit and stood there huffing and puffing from the effort, Ethan stopped the watch. “Five minutes. Not bad, all things considered.” He went on to explain the moves she made that wasted her time and caused her problems. Surprised, Charlene realized he wasn’t being bitter or sarcastic with her. Just as she was beginning to open her mouth to really talk to him, he barked out his next order. “Again! I don’t have all day.” Charlene groaned and stripped the suit off for another try. **** Watching Charlene leave the boat that night, Ethan wondered what he was going to do with her while they were out on the ocean. Just being near her was enough to send his pulse 30

Heart of the Storm jumping. Everything in him wanted to sweep away the last eight years and do it all over. This time though, he would keep her. He stood on the deck. It was an unusually clear night with thousands of stars in a black sky. The seagulls were still crying over the docks. His eyes followed her silhouette and made sure she was safely in her car. In the past, the boat would be his haven from the real world. Now, it was just a reminder of the things that he’d lost. What was so wrong with him that Charlene would leave him the way she had? That question plagued him now, just as it had for the last eight years. Being a successful captain gave him satisfaction, but no joy. Before she arrived, he’d thought it was enough. Now, he wasn’t so sure. Her own reactions to him told him she wanted him. Once, that might have been enough. Not anymore. As the bitter wind began to chill his bones, Ethan headed for the wheelhouse. This was his life. It was pretty obvious she didn’t want to be a part of it. It hurt, but growling about it didn’t help either. He would just have to keep distance between them. They were strangers with a shared past. That was all.

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Chapter 4 For the next three days, Charlene geared herself up for the weeks of king crab season. Staying away from Ethan wasn’t easy. The rest of the crew helped her get familiar again with being on a boat, but the captain insisted on getting her ready for the Coast Guard inspection. Worst of all, she hadn’t had time to get the right clothes for crab fishing. She’d bought a new warm coat, but that was all she’d been able to do before hopping on a plane to Alaska in time for king crab season. The preparation for the trip gave her precious little time to get clothes, rain gear and boots. Dutch Harbor didn’t have much to offer Charlene in the way of clothes. It was just a stop for crab fishermen. There weren’t very many residents. The fish plant operated seasonally and people came from all over to work the crab season. Finding suitable clothes for the trip out was almost impossible. King crab season started tomorrow and Charlene wasn’t ready. It was Barbara who gave Charlene some warm, practical clothes for working in the galley of a crab boat. So far, she and the proprietor hadn’t talked about the past or the reasons for her return. It was as if Barbara knew Charlene couldn’t talk about it. As Barbara helped her pack, the woman forced her to break her silence. “So, you gonna cook for the Big Captain, huh?” Barbara was packing away some socks for Charlene in a big Navy seabag. She was less than five feet tall with jet black hair only 32

Heart of the Storm slightly streaked gray. Her eyes were obsidian, glittering, almost young. She looked ageless. “I’m going to cook for Ethan Shannon. Is he ‘The Big Captain’?” Charlene leaned on the doorframe of Barbara’s bedroom. She looked at the pictures of crab boats, draggers and fishermen of all ages and different times. There were pictures everywhere in the place. “He the new high liner. He got the best crew. He got the best boat.” Barbara shrugged and cocked her head to the side. “He answer to nobody, no woman, no owner.” Charlene nodded. “That should make him happy, Maw maw.” She couldn’t keep the sting out of her voice. Barbara stopped packing clothes and turned her eyes on Charlene. “Don’t ‘maw maw’ me. You had him. You left him.” She turned away and pulled more flannel shirts from her closet. “He a fisherman. The sea is first and she a greedy mistress. You knew.” Charlene pushed away from the door and shifted her feet, no longer relaxed. “I know. I was young.” “He drank a lot when you left. He lost Kevin. You go. Then his daddy die and his mama too. All the Anacortes fishermen got big hole in their souls. Some say you broke his heart. He fill his life with the sea. Now you come back.” She stuffed another pair of socks in the bag. “What now?” “I don’t know.” Barbara nodded. “How you two gettin’ along?” Charlene made a very unladylike sound. “How do you think? He tells me what to do. He gets me into my survival suit in under a minute. He doesn’t talk about Anacortes. He acts as if we don’t know each other.” “Maybe he figure you don’t.” “Yeah, and maybe he’s just making me pay.” She started pacing in the hallway outside the bedroom door. 33

Heart of the Storm “He hard on you? Yell at you?” the old woman asked Charlene, but like she already knew the answer. “No, he doesn’t talk to me at all. He talks at me, but not to me.” “Humpf. Talk don’t do no good. If he want to make you pay, he leave you on shore.” “He wouldn’t. I do my job.” Barbara waved a hand. “Bah! That make no difference. He the captain. Whether you go or you stay, he the one who decides.” “Well, maybe he just wants me on the boat to torture me.” “More like to torture himself than you,” the older woman said dryly. Charlene stopped pacing abruptly and stared at her. “I don’t know what you mean.” She wet her suddenly dry lips. “Don’t you?” Barbara just looked at her. Charlene resumed pacing nervously and changed the subject. “I sure hope the boys get everything I put on the list.” “You be fine. No worries.” Barbara’s black eyes pinned Charlene and stopped her pacing. “What you gonna do with him?” Charlene looked at her feet. “You mean Ethan?” “No, I mean the devil. ’Course I mean Ethan. What you gonna do, Charlie?” “I’m going to do my job, Maw maw, and I’m going to find out what happened to Kevin and Jason.” Charlene knew she really hadn’t answered the question. Barbara let it drop. “What you find out so far?” “Not much. They’ve got the last known location and the search pattern covered a lot of sea, but all of that was a hundred and fifty miles south of where Jack Dory said he left them.” “What about the Feds?” 34

Heart of the Storm “You’re kidding, right? They don’t know anything about The Daughter of Norway being in Russian waters.” She was sneering. “They had an observer on the boat but it was the previous trip. Oh, and nobody knows anything about Ross Perry and Sean Cowell.” Charlene’s frustration started her pacing again. “Everything is a dead end. I’ve talked to everyone who may know anything. The only hint I’ve gotten is that the Coast Guard said they never got an EPIRB signal, which makes no sense. The boat was reported down. The Coast Guard got a Mayday. They found debris. But no boat and no signal. Nothing.” It was funny how she slipped into the usual fishing terms so easily, as if she’d never been away. Most people didn’t know that an EPIRB was an Emergency Position-Indicating Radiobeacon and that it only activated when submerged in water. So when a boat was in trouble, an automatic global positioning signal would give rescuers a location on the vessel. “What Ethan say?” “Ethan says I’m wasting my time. He thinks Dory is a liar and that I’m on a wild goose chase.” “He say that?” “I think his exact words were ‘Dory is a liar’.” “Dory is a liar.” “I have to try and find out.” “Ethan know that. That’s why he take you.” “You’d think he would want to know. Kevin and Jason were his best friends.” Barbara straightened up and put her hands on her hips. “What you think? You the only one who lost someone? You think you the only one who care?” She pointed a bony finger at Charlene. “You know who went out and search after the Coast Guard quit? He study tides. He search coastlines for debris. He lost more than just a friend. He and Kevin were closer than 35

Heart of the Storm blood. So, yeah, he want to know. But he been looking a long time. Maybe he not so hopeful no more.” She turned back to the clothes. Charlene was stunned. “I didn’t know he looked for Kevin. Why didn’t he tell me?” Barbara shrugged. “You left. He thought you wanted gone. He left you alone.” Charlene struggled and finally asked the question she really wanted to know. “Why didn’t he come after me, Maw maw?” She heard the hurt in her own voice. For a moment, Charlene thought Barbara looked puzzled. Then she shook her head. “You said, ‘Me or fishing’. He went fishing. Going after you would’ve changed nothing. He didn’t forget you though. He never forget you.” “I couldn’t forget him. I wish I could.” “What you wish don’t matter.” “You’re right. It doesn’t matter. He’s made it pretty clear what he thinks of me.” Barbara said nothing and kept packing, stuffing the seabag and closing it with a tarnished brass clip. Charlene hefted the seabag over her shoulder and headed down the narrow staircase lined with picture after picture of fishermen who stared at her and accused her. In their eyes, she swore she could see the questions. Why did you leave? Why did you walk away from your home, your family, and the love of your life? When she reached the bottom of the stairs, Barbara called into the kitchen. “Christopher? You there? You come pack Charlie’s bag in her car.” A big man filled the kitchen doorway holding a sandwich in his paw. Why did it seem all fishermen were giants? The man named Christopher picked up the seabag and took it out the front door. Barbara took Charlene into her warm arms and gave her a big hug. “You still love him?” 36

Heart of the Storm Charlene held on tight and whispered, “Yes.” Barbara patted her gently on her back. “I tough on you. You got a long road ahead. You listen.” She held Charlene at arm’s length. “That Dory may lie. You find the truth.” Charlene fought tears. She hugged the old woman and headed out the door. The slamming of the screen door behind her seemed to punctuate the beginning of an adventure for Charlene. To find the truth. The docks were buzzing about Charlene and her job on The Celtic Rose when she arrived that afternoon. Curious stares and speculative whispers followed her as she walked to the berth where The Celtic Rose was hitched. She ignored them all. For the last three days she came aboard to take inventory of the galley and make a list of groceries, which the crew agreed to go to the store and purchase. She helped with some of the bait loading, which shocked Jamie, the greenhorn. He didn’t think anyone with a manicure could deal with frozen fish. Ethan hardly said anything to her. It was driving her crazy. The whispering and staring just fueled her black mood. Listening to Barbara defend Ethan had rubbed raw too. A familiar restless feeling swept over her. She had always felt like this before when she set off for crab season. Until Charlene walked up, the crew had been relaxed, smoking and laughing. As she came toward the boat, they grew quiet and this irritated her even more. She dropped her bag on the dock with a thump and sat down, leaning her back against it. No one said anything. Not a very good beginning. Gravel flew in the parking area near the docks and Charlene saw Ethan’s truck jerk and squeal to a stop. Her eyes narrowed as she watched him step, no stagger, out of his seat and weave up the dock. Other fishermen came up and slapped him on the 37

Heart of the Storm back. Other deckhands waved. He lurched up the dock to The Celtic Rose. Charlene’s nose wrinkled at his smell. Whiskey. “You’re drunk.” Her voice was sharp and he winced. His state of inebriation seemed like a good reason to light into him. “So what?” Ethan swayed in front of her. His eyes were red and heavy. He was in the same clothes he was wearing the day before. She put a finger on his chest. “I signed up to find out what happened to my brother. I didn’t sign up to become a crab boat statistic at the bottom of the Bering Sea. You’re in no condition to do anything, much less captain this boat.” Ethan’s eyes narrowed and he smiled. “I’ll do what I want with my boat, Charlene. You can like it or lump it. Go on, quit. Run away. It’s what you do best.” Her answer was to the point and vulgar. Ethan laughed. “That’s good, Charlene. We’ll have you cussing like a fisherman in no time. Meanwhile, you can cook or get the hell out of here. I just don’t care.” For an answer, she picked up her seabag and threw it to Jamie. “I’m not going anywhere, Captain.” She stalked away and jumped aboard the boat. The rest of the crew followed, helping Ethan up to the wheelhouse. No, not a good beginning at all. **** Eight hours later, The Celtic Rose was ready to head out to sea. It was midnight and king crab season began. The engines roared to life with a rumble and the slow rocking of the boat became more intense as they headed further out in the Bering Sea. Charlene wanted to die. It had been eight years since she’d braved the waves on the Bering Sea. She forgot about the 38

Heart of the Storm miserable seasickness. As a frequent addition on her father’s crab boat, she usually started the voyage completely incapacitated. Puking never helped and the misery would last about twentyfour hours and then she was fine. Eight years of office work hadn’t prepared her for the lurching of the boat this time. Worst of all, she had to cook the first meal for the crew while completely green. Meatloaf, green beans and mashed potatoes were enough to send her scurrying out on deck for air and hanging over the deck rail for the next bout of nausea. The Bering Sea was slapping and rolling against the portside where Charlene was leaning. “Do you want me to take you back?” Ethan’s amusement was in his voice as he stood behind her. “No.” She managed to get the word out between retches. “Go away,” she choked out. “You’re out here without a life jacket. That’s stupid.” He roughly pulled her off the rail and put a life vest on her. “I didn’t exactly have time.” She was limp as he clicked the various straps together, avoiding any contact. “Make time. You don’t want to be a Bering Sea statistic.” He backed away when he finished putting on the life jacket. She looked at him through watery eyes. “You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?” She glared at him. “A little.” He shrugged. “I’m human.” “Sure you are,” she muttered. “I’m more human than you think.” His eyes were shadowed by the darkness on the deck. The lights on the boat were behind him and she couldn’t see his face. “Are you?” She stepped closer until she could see his face clearly. Close enough to see a muscle twitch in his jaw. “You’d better go back in the galley and take your medicine. The longer you’re out here, the worse they’re going to rag on 39

Heart of the Storm you.” He turned abruptly and walked toward the ladder to the wheelhouse. Her eyes followed him as he shimmied up the steps. It seemed strange. He was kind, almost caring in that interaction. He was such a mix of anger, bitterness, and reluctant concern. For a moment, she wondered what he’d meant by he was more human than she thought. Was she making him the monster to keep distance between them? With a frustrated sigh, she went back into the galley. Lying in bed that night, Charlene felt a mixture of elation being back on the ocean and frustration with her dealings with the captain. What could she do when every encounter led to either sexual tension or anger? She fell into a troubled sleep. Charlene adjusted to the swaying of the boat by the time they reached the fishing grounds about two hundred miles out from Dutch Harbor. After eighteen hours of grinding up bait, the crew was ready for the last meal they would have before long hours of setting crab pots and tossing buoys. Pogie, Cal, Jamie and Gabriel were all in the galley eating sausage, biscuits and scrambled eggs. Charlene felt small and dainty in the presence of all these big, solid men. It was a rare and comfortable feeling. “Well, at least you can cook, Charlie.” Pogie called her Charlie and she just didn’t have the heart to correct him. Consequently, the other men called her Charlie as well. Only Ethan made a point to call her Charlene and he did so with a wealth of sarcasm. “Did you doubt it, Pogie? Ethan wouldn’t hire someone who was a complete greenhorn.” She began to clean up the galley as the men ate. “Didn’t you used to go out on your daddy’s boats?” Cal asked her. 40

Heart of the Storm “I went out with Dad a lot.” She smiled. “I was fourteen when I snuck on board the boat the first time. Mom was furious. Dad just laughed. That trip was memorable.” Pogie laughed with her. “I’ll bet. Did Bull yell at you?” “Heck no. He put me to work. I ground up more bait that trip than I ever wanted.” She leaned against the counter and looked at the crew. “The thing is that I loved it. I loved the ocean. I loved the work and the crazy hours. Dad wanted to take me out and teach me the business, only Mom objected.” “She didn’t want her little girl to be a crab fisherman?” Gabriel spoke up quietly. “No. She hated fishing.” Charlene felt depressed when she thought of her mother. Bitterness was the only legacy Mona Henderson had passed to her only daughter. What a sad thought. “Dad still took me out on the boat and I cooked for the crew. So you see Ethan knew what he was doing when he hired me.” “How long have you known Ethan?” Cal asked. “All my life.” She smiled. “There was the five of us. Ethan, my brother Kevin, Jason Iverson, Ethan’s sister Kelly and me. We went everywhere together.” “You grew up in Anacortes, then?” Jamie said. “Yup. Fishing family all the way.” She put more sausage on the table. “Except your mother,” Gabriel added quietly. “Well, Mom is the only one,” she said quickly. “The rest of us loved the sea and the boats.” She laughed. “You should have seen the celebration when Kevin got the captain’s seat of The Daughter of Norway. It was something!” “I heard about it.” Pogie laughed too. “Old Bull got so drunk that he kept asking the bartender to sing a Norwegian lullaby.”

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Heart of the Storm Everyone was laughing. Charlene added, “Yes, and when he sang Danny Boy Dad didn’t know the difference. He told the bartender he sounded like he was from the old country.” The laughter filled the galley and then stopped. She noticed that the crew had focused on a spot behind her. She turned around to find Ethan standing in the door of the galley listening quietly. Something in his face told her he remembered those days. His eyes were filled with a dark pain. After a moment, Ethan tore his eyes away and poured himself a cup of coffee. He got a plate and filled it with food before he sat down. Charlene turned back to the sink and started cleaning the dishes. Jamie spoke, breaking the tense and uncomfortable silence. “So what’s the plan, Captain? Where are we fishing?” “We’re heading up further north.” Ethan took a sip of coffee and began to eat. Between mouthfuls he explained his decision. “There’s some crab fishing grounds that haven’t been fished in more than twenty years. My dad hit it then and it was a jackpot. We’re going to set the pots deeper.” “That’s why we packed the extra line, right?” Cal put in. “Yup, that’s it. We’ll see if I’m right.” “You haven’t let us down yet.” Pogie got up and put his dishes on the counter by Charlene. “Are we going to check out Big Diomede Island while we’re up there? That’s where Dory said he left Kevin, right?” Ethan stared into his coffee cup. Charlene watched him through wary eyes. “That’s the plan.”

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Chapter 5 That night, Charlene woke up sweating and frustrated. It was two in the morning and her room, a small stateroom off the galley, was completely dark. She heard the snoring of the crew from their quarters down by the engine room and felt the swaying of the boat as the waves flowed over the bow of the boat. Her mind went back to the first time Ethan made love to her. “Charlie, I-I should leave you alone.” Ethan’s hands framed her face. The touch of his fingers on her face made her shiver. “Please, Ethan. Please touch me.” She closed her eyes and felt his hands tighten and his fingers thread through her hair. She purred. That sound seemed to unleash something in him. With one hand still in her hair, he moved his other arm around her waist and pulled her against him. Everything in her felt heated and warm. She knew nothing about what would happen next, but she trusted Ethan. He would know how to fill that hunger inside her. She wanted to be a part of him. Even as she molded herself against him whens he lowered his head to devour her lips, she wanted to be closer. His tongue plunged inside her mouth and she was lost in sensation. Her legs went weak and his arm tightened around her to hold her up. His apartment was hot all of a sudden and he broke the kiss abruptly. “You’re torturing me, baby.” He dropped his forehead against hers. “You have to leave or I’m going to make love to you right here and 43

Heart of the Storm now.” His hands were gentle now, cupping her neck and stroking her back. She lifted her hands and put them on either side of his face. She looked at him and saw the doubt and desire mixed in his beautiful green eyes. “Do it. I’m no china doll, Ethan. I know what I want. And I want you.” She pulled his head down and thrust her tongue in his mouth, reveling in the heat of his lips and the smell of salt air that clung to him. His hands were everywhere. Somehow her shirt came off and he was cupping her breast, rubbing his thumb over her nipple. She groaned with need and arched her back, breaking their kiss. He put his teeth to her exposed throat and his expert hands unclasped the front hook of her bra. As it fell away, he leaned back and just looked. Charlene felt shy and embarrassed. She put her hands up to hide her breasts and he reached out and took hold of her hands. “No, don’t. You’re beautiful, Charlie. You’re perfect.” His green eyes were a dark, stormy sea. His silky tone and intense gaze made her feel powerful and weak all at the same time. She felt like a woman. Charlie Henderson wasn’t “one of the boys” anymore. He dropped his clothes and watched her eyes as she admired the hardness of his whole body. He only let her look for a moment, and then she found herself flat on his living room floor with his hands stroking her breasts and his mouth traveling over her face and neck. When he moved down her body and his mouth took a nipple in his mouth, she bowed back, desperately wanting something, but not knowing what. His hands moved to her waist and stripped her of her jeans and panties with one strong tug. He gave her no time for modesty as his fingers fluttered in a place she didn’t know existed. She felt needy, melting. When his finger pressed inside her gently, she almost bounded off the floor. Her head spun and her hands grasped his hair. With his lips near her ear, he whispered, “You’re so wet and hot. I don’t know if I can hang on. I want to be in you so bad, Charlie.” His 44

Heart of the Storm eyes held hers, intense and serious. “Invite me in, Charlie. Tell me you want me too.” Couldn’t he feel it? Just the touch of his fingers sent her spilling over his hand. What did he want to hear? Her confusion showed on her face, but when he reached for her hand and drew it down to his long and hard erection, she closed her eyes in pleasure. The feel of him was all velvet and steel. The confusion left her. Somehow she found the words to say to him, “Ethan, I want you so much. Please, come inside me. Please.” The last word was a whisper as he thrust his finger further inside her. Her body clenched and she felt tense and edgy, not knowing how to find relief. She wanted Ethan to give her that relief. “Please,” she begged again. “Yes, Charlie. That’s what I want. There’s more, though, Charlie. Will you let me show you?” His voice was gritty and low. “Just do it, Ethan. Please, stop torturing me.” Her hands pulled his head to hers and she kissed him with all her pent-up frustration. She was so close. She didn’t know what she needed, but she knew she was on the edge of it. His lips pulled away from hers and he moved down her body, quickly reaching his goal. With his finger still inside her, his tongue found that secret place she didn’t know was there. The roughness of his tongue scraped her rhythmically as his finger moved inside her. She moved helplessly against his mouth, seeking more and begging him for relief. Her cry was forced from her as she tumbled into oblivion. Her vision went black and she saw stars as her first orgasm hit her. He gave her no respite and drove her to the edge again and pushed her over. Her hips moved of their own volition and her cries became desperate. She gripped his head with her hands and cried out, “Please, Ethan. I can’t stand it.” He lifted his head and moved up her body, stopping to lick her breasts lovingly. His hands fumbled as he searched his jeans pocket for a condom. She grabbed the package from him and with trembling hands smoothed it over him. She’d only heard about condoms, but the heat in 45

Heart of the Storm his eyes encouraged her. The groan she elicited from him sent her hands up his chest and over his nipples. He pressed her hips against him and looked into her face. “Now and forever, Charlie. Say it!” His penis was rubbing just outside of her warm entrance and she wanted all of him. “Now and forever, Ethan! Now and forever.” She arched her hips. He plunged into her and she careened higher and higher. She exploded and felt Ethan go faster and faster until he cried out one long groan. She held him close. Now and forever. Forever was apparently only one month. One month after their first amazing encounter, she’d left Anacortes, Washington her family and her friends and went to Los Angeles. Her father had died the following month and her mother had moved to Seattle right after his death. The loss of her brother, her father and her home all in less than a year had made Charlene numb. She threw herself into her work as a hospital secretary until she became an invaluable asset to the national corporation that owned it. With her father’s work ethic and her mother’s shrewdness, she kept moving up the corporate food chain. Her forays into dating were failures. How could any man live up to that first experience? Charlene hadn’t known at nineteen how rare her first experience really was. Her various friends made it clear that having an orgasm, much less several, was practically unheard of for a virgin. Shaking her head, she sat up in her small bunk and got dressed. What was the point of tossing and turning? She wasn’t going to sleep. She was horny and only one man could relieve her hunger. And he wasn’t willing. **** Ethan was awake sitting in the captain’s chair. The red glow of his cigarette was reflected in the windows. He could hear the 46

Heart of the Storm wind and feel the gentle swell of the ocean. It usually calmed him. Not this time. Memories swamped him. He couldn’t shut them out. Pictures in his mind of Charlene and Kevin racing him down the Anacortes streets on their bikes. Like a relentless slide show, Charlene at ten, fourteen, seventeen, nineteen passed through his memory. He closed his eyes. He remembered that first time. Her innocence had been so appealing and so deadly. Every moment they’d spent making love haunted him. There was the time they devoured each other in the seat of his old Ford pickup. Then the time she caught him asleep in his apartment and woke him up with her mouth on his penis for the first time. That thought led to another and another until sitting in the captain’s chair was uncomfortable. Hearing her talk about her childhood—their childhood— brought back too much. It was better to remember that she was only here to find out what happened to Kevin. If not for her brother, Charlene Henderson would not have come home. If it wasn’t for Jack Dory, she would have stayed in L.A. content and happy. Damn. Keeping his hands off her was the only way he would survive, but it was impossible. Those curves, those chocolate brown eyes still bewitched him. All the changes he saw in her only added to her attraction. He was well aware he hurt Charlene after he kissed her. He meant to. It was that, or strip her clothes off and give into the need gnawing at his guts. He wanted her so bad it hurt. All the fire was there. The passion that had exploded between them eight years ago had only gotten stronger over time. He felt it in her kiss. He didn’t know how to read the rest of her anymore, but he knew her passion. Her reaction to his kiss wasn’t the innocent surprise from eight years earlier. It was powerful and instant. 47

Heart of the Storm It had rubbed him the wrong way when she implied she didn’t want him. Proving her wrong had been both torture and pleasure. He knew taunting her was the only way to keep distance between them. He could still count on Charlie Henderson’s temper. He groaned at the need burning in his own belly. It wasn’t just the need to touch her and kiss her. He wanted to see her look at him the way she had before. If it was just lust, he could shrug it off. It wasn’t just lust, though that was certainly making him uncomfortable. Nothing had changed. He still loved her whether she called herself Charlie or Charlene. Ethan stared out at the stars and wished he could sleep. Coffee. I need coffee. He put the boat on autopilot. Grabbing his coffee mug, he headed down the stairs that went down to the galley. At the bottom, he stopped short. Charlene stood at the sink, cup in hand, looking as tired as he felt. His body’s powerless response to her presence made him edgy and cranky. **** Charlene looked up and saw Ethan standing at the bottom of the steps. Her stomach clenched and rolled just looking at him. Mussed up brown hair, more than a five o’clock shadow and green eyes that changed color with his mood. Right now, they were hot, fiery green. She couldn’t tell if it was temper or desire heating his eyes. Yanking her eyes away from him, she turned to the coffeepot and silently offered to pour him a cup. Avoiding eye contact wasn’t difficult since she had to concentrate on making sure the coffee got into the cup. She wanted to look at him. She wanted to see the warmth that used to be there when they were as close.

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Heart of the Storm Silence stretched out between them. Out on deck, the wind was blowing hard enough to rock the galley. A raspy sound came from Ethan as he cleared his throat. “Sit down, Charlene.” She winced at his voice saying her name, not her nickname. “We need to hash this out.” He sighed and flung himself into the booth in the galley corner. Charlene sat down gingerly avoiding any collisions with him. “What do we need to hash out, Ethan? It’s all clear, isn’t it? I left you eight years ago, so I have to pay. I can deal with the silent treatment,” she lied bravely. Really, the silent treatment was the worst. “The tension isn’t good for the boat and the crew. You and I have our stuff, but it doesn’t belong on a boat and you know it.” Ramrod straight and avoiding his eyes, she stared at the galley door. “I’m not doing anything, Captain.” The last word had a sting to it and both of them knew it. “You don’t have to do anything.” Impatiently he thrust his hand through his hair. “Damn it, Charlene. I’m trying to be reasonable. What the hell do you want from me?” For a moment, just an instant, Charlene thought about telling him exactly what she wanted in detail. She looked him right in the eye. She couldn’t say it. How could she say, I want you to make love to me like the last eight years never happened? Her eyes drifted closed to shut out the vision of the thing she couldn’t have. Something must have shown in her face. Like lightning Ethan came up out of his seat. He hauled her into his arms. “Don’t look at me like that. Can’t you see what you’re doing to me?” She opened her eyes in surprise. He looked edgy, tortured. Tired, frustrated in a million different ways, Charlene decided words just weren’t going to do it. 49

Heart of the Storm One hand twisted in his hair. The other gently touched his cheek. Why not relieve both of them? He wanted her. She wanted him. Everything else was just noise. Her eyes met his and she pulled his head down to hers. Something happened when their lips touched. All the resentment and anger that fueled their silence disappeared. Gently she moved her lips over his, reveling in the moan that escaped from him. When his tongue finally touched hers, there was no impatient thrusting or pressure. It was all silk and honey. She floated, feeling his hands pulling her closer by grasping her hips. Memories of other times he took her with seductive patience made her body clench in anticipation. “Take me to your bed, Ethan. Please.” Her voice was husky and thick. Through slitted lids, she saw his eyes grow sharp instead of hazy from passion. The evidence of his desire was pressed against her thigh, so she knew he wanted her. Why was he hesitating? He put his hands on either side of her face and kissed her gently. “No.” She reared back from him. How could she be so stupid? Begging him would only give him the satisfaction of turning her down. Physically, she ached. Emotionally, she felt battered and confused. She turned her back on him. “I see. So what was this? A test? See how long you can torture a woman and get away with it?” Spitting the words at him, she knew she was losing her reason. Ethan’s eyes narrowed. “I don’t do torture, Charlene.” “You could have fooled me.” “Look, let me explain—” Charlene whipped around and pointed a finger at him. “I don’t want to hear your excuses. This is just another humiliation for me. Feeding your damn ego is killing me. You need to stay the hell away from me, Ethan Shannon.” 50

Heart of the Storm In his fiery green eyes, she saw that she had stepped over the line. His face was set in anger and Charlene took a hasty step back. Whatever barriers he had put up against her just shattered. She could see it in his eyes. Reaching out his hands, he grasped her upper arms in a bruising grip. Fear skittered down her spine. “I did, Charlie Henderson. I let you walk away eight years ago. You made decisions for both of us. Not this time. I’m not going to get all tangled up in bed with you and have you ditch me when it suits you. If we screw, you’re sticking. If that frustrates you, that’s too damn bad.” He released her violently and stomped up the stairs to the wheelhouse. Charlene stood gaping after him. What just happened? Never, even in the early days, did she see Ethan Shannon lose his temper. He was a slow burner. It took a long time to get him angry enough to become violent. His frustration was evident, but she’d been so busy dealing with her own, she’d missed his. “Ahem.” A small noise brought her out of her shock. “Pogie! Did we wake you? I’m sorry.” She felt embarrassment wash over her. How long had Pogie been standing there? “Yes, you woke me.” His face was grizzled and tired. “Can I give you a little piece of advice, Charlie?” “Okay.” “Don’t piss the captain off. The Bering Sea isn’t the safest place to fish. He needs to be on top of his game.” The implied criticism brought hot words to her lips, but Pogie held up a hand. “I know you have a history with him. I don’t know how you feel about him now, but I know him.” Pogie crossed the galley and patted her shoulder. “If he loved you once, he still does. You just have to decide if you love all of him or just the parts that 51

Heart of the Storm scratch an itch.” He turned his back and walked back to his stateroom. For the second time, Charlene was left stunned in the galley.

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Chapter 6 The next two days were a blur. The Celtic Rose reached its destination and started dropping pots. Charlene found herself cooking at odd times and doing laundry as well. Round-theclock coffee was imperative. She found the job exhilarating and satisfying. She loved being on the ocean again and realized now she had missed the sea. Anacortes was her hometown, but the ocean was her home and she’d been away too long. She and Ethan had declared an uneasy truce. There was no more silent treatment and no more sniping at each other. The stilted politeness between them was making Charlene crazy. When had they ever been polite to each other? Walking outside the galley, she took a deep breath of the salt air. Charlene watched the complicated dance that the crab fisherman accomplished on deck. The crane would lift a pot in place on the rail and Jamie would scurry inside the square cage and hang a bag of bait. Gabriel would toss the line as Cal pulled the crane levers to dump the cage into the churning ocean. Over and over the steps of the dance crossed the deck of the boat while it rocked back and forth. Charlene was fascinated by how easy these men made it look. She knew it was extremely hard work and it never stopped. She helped Jamie grind bait, which was a never-ending, mind-numbing job given to the greenhorn. He was funny and charming, but young. 53

Heart of the Storm Jamie’s hazel eyes became bloodshot and Pogie looked stiffer every passing hour as they worked around the clock for twenty-four hours. Charlene caught a few naps when she could. She knew Ethan wasn’t sleeping at all. The weather on the Bering Sea, unpredictable and messy, turned rough and Ethan was in the wheelhouse trying to hold the boat on course. She knew he was ready to drop and he needed sleep. There was a lull in setting the pots while Ethan ran the boat another twenty miles northeast to another spot he wanted to fish. Charlene had prepared a meal for the crew and headed up to the wheelhouse. “I’ve got coffee,” she said, holding out his cup. Ethan didn’t even look up from the charts and the notepad in front of him. Eyes red, hair askew and unshaven, he wasn’t exactly looking his best. Charlene’s stomach clenched at the sight of him. “Thanks.” He held his hand out and took the cup. Crab fishing didn’t leave time for showers and deodorant. The smell wafting off of the captain was enough to wrinkle her nose, and also make her pulse hum. Sighing inwardly, she knew it didn’t matter if he was in a tuxedo or ratty sweats, he was the man who attracted her like no other. She sat in the other chair in the wheelhouse and just let her thoughts wander. What did she have to show for the last eight years? A good job, some friends, a nice car. It all seemed empty as she looked out on the Bering Sea. Its wildness and strength called to her. What exactly did she have in her life? Her career was successful but not fulfilling. Her apartment was comfortable, but not home. Part of her was wondering now how she had stood it all for eight years. Could she go back to it, no matter what she found out about her brother? Looking out over the bow and 54

Heart of the Storm watching the roll and pitch of the ocean, Charlene never wanted to leave again. “You’ve become a restful person,” Ethan said. With raised eyebrows, she asked a silent question. He answered it. “You used to talk all the time.” He grinned. “I liked it, but I like the silences too. You’ve changed.” “It’s been eight years, Ethan.” She bit her tongue. Why did she have to remind him? “I know it.” He turned back to the charts. “You’ve changed too. I watch you with the crew. You ride them hard, but you’re never too pushy with them. They respect you. Before, you were always in too much of a hurry.” Pushing away the charts, he swiveled his chair and looked at her. “Mom and Dad’s deaths slowed me down a lot.” “Barbara told me that they died in an accident,” she said tentatively. His eyes were so sad, she wanted to hold him and comfort him. His voice held no emotion when he said, “Yes. They were on an anniversary trip to Juneau. The plane’s engine failed and they crashed.” “You and Kelly must have been devastated.” Charlene remembered Ethan’s sister was seventeen that year. What a load to carry for him. “We were. It happened about three months after Bull died. I felt like I lost two fathers. If it hadn’t been for Dutch, I don’t think I would have made it.” He lit a cigarette and looked out the window into the blackness over the ocean. His jaw tightened with determination. “Dutch is a wonderful man.” “Barbara Kanook was the one who helped Kelly. I’d bring her to Dutch Harbor with a load of homework from high school and a teenage attitude and leave her with Barbara. Kelly graduated with a three point five GPA that year.” He smiled. “I 55

Heart of the Storm was too busy chasing crab to help her with that. It was all Barbara.” “She helps a lot of people.” She helped me. Motherless children were her specialty. “She tried to talk Kelly out of working for the fish plant, but Kelly wants to make enough to pay for college herself. She won’t even let me help her.” “What does she want to do?” “She wants to go into marine biology. I think she plans on working on the ocean somehow.” “That’s great. She’s not taking the easy way.” “No. Since Mom and Dad died, she’s really worked hard. Off season, she tries to take some courses and then during crab season, she comes to Dutch Harbor with me.” “I’m so sorry, Ethan.” I wish I could have been there for you. Saying that out loud would have opened a can of worms she wasn’t ready to deal with. As his shoulders sagged, he turned to look at her. “I’m sorry too.” It seemed they were both talking of other things, but Charlene wasn’t sure what. Studying his face, she noted the fatigue written there. “Ethan, you need to go sleep. I can run us where we need to go.” Charlene couldn’t believe how tired and worn Ethan looked. Fighting the Bering Sea was wearing him out and she wanted him to rest, not talk about the past. “I’m fine, Charlene.” His words were becoming slurred and sluggish. “No, you’re not.” She was careful not to touch him but she stood beside him. “Take a rest. It’s only a twenty-mile run. I promise not to sink her, okay?” He looked at her blankly. It had obviously been more than twenty-four hours since he’d slept. His green eyes were dull, his 56

Heart of the Storm face was gray and his back was stooped. Still, he was handsome. She sighed. “Go. Get some sleep.” She took the wheel. He stumbled toward his bunk in a small room off the wheelhouse. Before he fell on his bunk, he turned to Charlene. “I never gave up, Charlie. Not ever. I kept looking. I loved Kevin. He was the brother I never had.” She opened her mouth to say something, anything, but saw he was already out cold. Tears stung her eyes. Impatiently, she wiped them away and concentrated on keeping the boat steady. Not only did Charlene run the twenty miles to the next set, but she started the boat back to the first string of pots the crew had set twenty-four hours earlier. Ethan had the longitude and latitude written down, so she headed in that direction and let Ethan sleep. The crew also slept. She was the only one awake. It felt as if she was alone on the Bering Sea. It gave her time to think about Kevin. If Jack Dory was right, then Kevin wasn’t lost at sea. He’d been murdered and The Daughter of Norway was out there somewhere. Or he was alive. She shook her head. Kevin wouldn’t do that. He couldn’t let his family believe he was dead. If he was alive, he would have come home. What could keep him from getting back to his family if he lived? The dead ends she ran into were frustrating. The two deckhands with no past apparently disappeared without a trace. No bodies were found. Big Diomede Island was Russian territory, though. Would the Russians have ignored two murdered bodies? Even with the unstable relations between Russia and the United States, something like that would have made it into the news. What if Jack Dory was lying? 57

Heart of the Storm Then there were the sly whispers on the docks. The looks she got from other fishermen and their families were ones she recognized. Only the truth would make those furtive looks go away. All of a sudden, the task of finding any trace of her brother seemed so overwhelming, Charlene wanted to cry. It’s just fatigue. Suck it up, girl. White knuckles showed as she tightened her hands on the wheel. It’s my job. I have to find out what happened. No one else will. She looked over at the bunk where Ethan’s compact frame was sprawled over his bunk. No one except Ethan. **** Ethan was dreaming. He was there again, in his apartment with Charlie. Making love was so perfect with her. They were relaxing after amazing sex, recovering really, and he started to get ready for his next trip. “Ethan, do you have to go?” Her voice was suddenly high and strained. “Yeah, baby, I do. Dad doesn’t want to miss a season and I’m trying to get into the captain’s seat.” Distracted by packing and thinking about the trip, he missed the signs of her unhappiness. “You could die, Ethan. What will I do if you die?” Finally looking at her, he saw she was panicked by the thought of his death. Helplessness washed over him. “My dad is counting on me, Charlie. I have to go.” In a snap, the panic disappeared and bitter anger filled her words to him. “Fishing. That’s all you ever think about. What about us? You want me to end up like my mom? ‘Lost At Sea’ is the worst thing to happen to a woman. No body, no way to grieve, no goodbye.” He reached out to take her in his arms and comfort her as he had so many times, but she jerked away. “No. You have to choose.” 58

Heart of the Storm He went still. “What?” “It’s me or that damn boat. If you love me, you’ll give up fishing. You’ll find something that won’t kill you.” Bewildered, he took in the set of her jaw and hardness of her eyes. “If I don’t?” he said very quietly. “Then we’re through. I won’t try and make a life with a fisherman. I won’t sit and listen to the weather reports hoping that you’ll come home. If you choose fishing, then you don’t love me.” Tears streamed down her face. Ethan felt something die inside him. For a brief, shining moment he’d thought he would have all his dreams come true. He thought he could be on the ocean and have the woman he loved all his life. That hope died within him. Picking up his duffle bag, he headed toward the door. He stopped. He was leaving and he might not be back. He didn’t want to leave things like this between them. He dropped his duffle bag, turned around, and took her in his arms. He covered her gasp of surprise with his mouth and drank deeply, loving her instant response and his own. When the kiss broke, he looked at her intently. “I love you. I’ll never stop loving you. And I’ll never ask you to change who you are.” “Can you promise me you’ll never leave me?” she whispered. “You know I can’t.” He backed away. She turned her back on him. “Then there’s nothing left to say.” Still he hesitated. “I have to go, Charlie.” “You’d better go then.” She didn’t look at him or turn around. Confused and bewildered, he went to the docks and got aboard his dad’s boat. He watched the shoreline grow farther and farther away. The emptiness inside him was an echoing cavern. He scanned the docks hoping to see her, hoping she’d change her mind. **** 59

Heart of the Storm Charlene could hear Ethan stirring restlessly. Once she thought she heard him say her name from his bunk in the wheelhouse. The crew picked up the twenty pots they’d dropped the day before and started for the next string. It was time to wake the captain so she could go down and make the crew something to eat. She bent over his bunk and touched his forehead with the back of her hand. “Ethan. Wake up, Ethan,” she spoke softly. Sleeping, he looked young and vulnerable. Feelings of tenderness and passion welled up inside of her. Keeping her hands gentle, she clasped his face between them. She leaned down and touched her lips to his. For a heartbeat, he lay still beneath her. Then, his hands crept around her and pulled her closer. Relaxing into his arms, warmth flooded through her as their tongues touched. She felt the moment he really woke up. He stiffened, and their eyes met. Drowsy with sleep, his green eyes sharpened abruptly and their lips broke apart. Charlene felt his heart beating beneath her hands and their breaths mingled. For a moment, they stared at each other and then Ethan gently pushed her off onto the floor. “You need to go cook dinner for the crew.” Her heart felt shattered as she watched the coldness take over his eyes. It was a mistake to kiss him. With a shaky voice she said, “You kissed me back.” If anything, he eyes grew colder. Chips of ice were warmer. “I was asleep. You know the rules, Charlene. I don’t just need a warm body. Have you changed your mind?” Not knowing the answer to that question, Charlene backed away in confusion, turned and ran down the stairs.

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Chapter 7 As Charlene cooked dinner, she tried to gather her confused thoughts. Every time Ethan touched her, she felt the pull between them. And she backed away every time, frightened of the consequences of getting too close. She loved him, but she didn’t know what that really meant. Their love was like the Bering Sea. It was wild, unpredictable and overwhelming. Like the sea, she both loved and feared it. It was dangerous. Thinking about the question Ethan had asked her, she wondered if the answer would be clear to her. Loving Ethan was easy. Being with Ethan was more difficult. The past reared its ugly head every time they talked to each other. Could they get past the hurt and resentments? “What’s cooking?” Charlene jumped as Cal walked in the galley. She hadn’t heard him come in. That door was noisy too. Shaking her head, she brought her mind back to the present. “Pork chops, stuffing and green beans. Lots of them.” She grinned at Cal. Cal reminded her of the perfect football quarterback. Handsome, confident and talented, he was a born leader for the crew. Being around him was pleasant, but Charlene was very aware that she was no cheerleader type. “That’s great. No more boxed mac and cheese.” He sprawled across the nook by the table. “Ethan still sleeping?” he asked. “Nope, I woke him up.” 61

Heart of the Storm Cal’s eyes followed her movements. It was a little unnerving. “So what is it with you guys? You look like you have more history than just growing up as kids together.” Eyeing him, she couldn’t tell if he was just avidly curious or something else. “We were together once. It didn’t work out,” she said it quietly. “Really? Why not?” Cal seemed concerned, but Charlene wasn’t going to dump her struggle on him. “I was too young,” she said, shrugging her shoulders. “And I was too stupid.” Ethan stood in the doorway to the wheelhouse stairs. He seemed to have put aside his cold anger from her kiss. Not that what replaced it was comfortable. Her eyes met his, and as before, the electricity between them crackled. “We have to quit meeting like this,” she tried to joke. His green eyes were twinkling, and her heart twisted. She remembered that twinkle, and didn’t trust it. That mischievous gleam often preceded his teasing. “Hey, Cal, did I ever tell you the story about the dead seagull that almost ended my fishing career?” She could follow where he was going with this. “Don’t you dare tell him that story. That was more than ten years ago.” Cal grinned. “Go ahead. Tell me.” Charlene threw up her hands and sat down, arms crossed and stuck her lower lip out. She hated this story. “Well, Charlene always had to do whatever Kevin did no matter what, even though he was older. Bull taught Kevin to shoot this .308 shotgun he had for deer hunting. So, of course, Charlene had to learn to shoot it but without Bull knowing.” She felt her lips twitching. Just like old times. 62

Heart of the Storm Ethan leaned against the door frame. “I got volunteered. Do you remember how that happened, Charlene?” “Jason volunteered you because he was hoping you’d get shot,” she growled. “Right. Now I remember.” His grin was making her furious. “So, I’m teaching Charlene to shoot which was kind of fun some of the time—” “Knock it off! Get to the point, Shannon,” she demanded. “I will, but you have to quit interrupting. So, I’m teaching her to shoot and we put a can up on the side of the dock. Charlene takes aim and shoots.” Charlene rolled her eyes. “Here it comes,” she muttered. “Only the kickback from the shotgun lands her flat on her butt and her shot goes high, killing an innocent seagull.” Ethan looked as if he was enjoying himself. She glared at him. Cal was smiling when he asked, “How did that almost end your captain’s career?” “PETA was protesting the fish plant right where we were docked,” Ethan replied, his voice dry. Charlene just groaned. “The Protection for Ethical Treatment of Animals watched a seagull fall to the docks. The only problem was that Charlene was on her butt and I was holding the gun.” “Oh no.” Cal started laughing. “It took me hours to convince the nice policeman that I accidentally shot the bird and I wasn’t trying to protect Ethan’s sorry hide,” Charlene said. “Meanwhile, Bull took strips off that sorry hide for teaching Charlene to shoot.” “I learned to shoot, didn’t I?” “Bull was smart.” Ethan smiled at her. Instantly suspicious, Charlene asked, “Why?” “He didn’t give you too much firepower.” “Ha, ha, very funny, big man. I bet I can outshoot you.” 63

Heart of the Storm “I’ll bet you can, Annie.” “Annie?” “Annie Oakley.” “Shut up, Ethan. It’s time for dinner.” Ethan just laughed. They sat down for dinner and didn’t talk about the past anymore. For Charlene, not talking about the past didn’t mean it was out of her mind. In fact, it became all she thought about. **** The trip had been successful so far. It was an endless parade of dropping crab pots into the icy water, meals snatched at odd times and bait grinding. Even though the work was tough and the mental strain was tougher, Charlene loved it. In a week, they dropped all one hundred pots off the deck and picked them up. The Bering Sea gave up her treasures, but not without effort. Ethan found a spot that yielded a string of full pots crawling with large crab and they dropped the pots right back in after emptying them. The crew’s spirit was light as they piled more crab into the fish holds. Charlene couldn’t help but grin as Pogie held up the biggest crab of the catch like a winning prize. She waved to him from the galley door. There were no more conversations about the past. The talk was only about crab fishing. Though Charlene was loving every minute, she wondered when Ethan was going to get around to looking for her brother. When Ethan announced he was taking the boat into St. Paul Island to offload the catch, she decided to find out when they were going north. As usual, she found him in the captain’s chair drinking coffee and staring at numbers on a pad of paper. “Ethan, when are we going to look for Kevin?” Without looking up, he said, “After I offload this crab.” She waiting, letting the silence stretch between them. 64

Heart of the Storm Finally, he moved impatiently and looked up at her. Her heart twisted as she saw how tired he was. His voice was raspy from too many cigarettes and not enough sleep. “Look, Charlene. We don’t know who is out there. Somebody took a potshot at your plane. I’m trying to make it look like a crab trip. The only way I know to do that is to bring in crab. If we go straight north, everybody will know why we’re going. I offload crab at St. Paul and then go north, we might fool them.” Charlene shook her head in disbelief. “You don’t really believe that, do you?” Her voice got higher and she tried to control her anger. “This is about getting more crab, isn’t it?” She watched his eyes narrow into slits. “You’re damn right. I’m still going to get a trip in while we’re looking for Kevin. The weather is getting nasty, Charlene, and I want to get the catch off the boat before it’s all dead.” “I don’t like it.” Goosebumps rose on her skin and Charlene rubbed her arms. “I don’t care.” He turned back to his numbers. Charlene was tired and sore. “You can be a real asshole when you put your mind to it, can’t you?” “I’m the captain. I’m supposed to be an asshole.” “I don’t remember that being part of the job description.” Ethan shrugged. “You’ve been gone a while. Besides, your dad was a jerk when he had to be.” “Not to me, he wasn’t,” she stated. The snort Ethan let out was comment enough, but he added, “You have a selective memory, Charlene.” She opened her mouth to speak but he cut her off. “Look, I’m tired. I’ve got paperwork to do and crab to offload. Save your complaining for later.” Throwing up her hands in frustration, she left the wheelhouse grumbling under her breath. 65

Heart of the Storm The ocean was beginning to churn and boil as the winds became wild and forceful. Ethan pulled into St. Paul’s weighing station carefully and the crew got ready to prepare for the offload. Charlene watched as Pogie stood by and counted the crab. Ethan left the boat and went to the station house to fill out the paperwork required to sell the crab. The deck was busy and noisy as a basket was lowered into the fish holds and the crab tossed in for weighing. It was a familiar scene and it brought back memories of her father’s boat. Sitting in the galley, lost in memories of other offloads and other crews, she almost didn’t hear when Pogie stuck his head in and spoke to her. “We’ve got trouble, Charlie.” Dragging herself back to the present, she focused on the furrow between Pogie’s eyes. “What’s wrong?” “We’ve got official visitors.” Charlene stood and put her raincoat on to step out on deck. She found four government officials standing by the basket which was no longer offloading crab. “What’s the problem?” She smiled, knowing this was all part of the new regulations of fishing and a pleasant response was required to keep the boat out of trouble. A very tall, serious looking man spoke. “I’m afraid you’ve gone over the quota here for this offload.” That wasn’t good. Huge fines were involved here and Charlene knew it. Pogie asked, “What do you mean? We’ve got less than a hundred and fifty thousand here. Our quota is three hundred thousand.” The man checked a clipboard. “Yes, but you’re only listed for a hundred thousand at St. Paul Island.” 66

Heart of the Storm One of the other officials stepped forward. His air of authority was unmistakable. The set of his stooped shoulders and the arrogance in his eyes told Charlene he was the man in charge. “You see,” he said smoothly, “you have to offload all of the crab. You can’t keep some of it on the boat when you go back out.” She knew what that meant. The extra crab would be sold at a cheaper price and the boat would make less money. She studied the man who spoke. The shortest of the four, he was thin and stooped with a huge winter jacket that made him look desiccated. Still, he pushed himself forward and left her with no doubt that dealing with him wouldn’t be easy. His grey eyes were sharp and unyielding. Trading glances with Pogie, she knew that these men were going to search the boat. Sending a quick prayer up that Ethan had all his permits in order, she gave a slight nod to Pogie. Those steel eyes were studying her and Charlene felt like a bug on a card. The man finally spoke again. “My name is Ken Stabler.” He smiled a crooked smile that would look boyish and cute on a twenty-year-old and but was creepy on this man in his forties. “Not the quarterback, I might add.” That comment sounded like one he’d used a million times before. She just barely kept from rolling her eyes. Charlene put on her best “administrator” smile and shook the man’s limp hand. She took an instant dislike to him. “I’m Charlene Henderson. I’m only the cook on The Celtic Rose, so Pogie will be the man to talk to about looking over the books.” Stabler smiled, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “Oh, that’s right. You’re Bull Henderson’s daughter. So you’re back, are you?” “Yes. I missed crab fishing.” As she made that simple statement, she realized how much she missed it all those years. 67

Heart of the Storm “Well, I don’t happen to think the Bering Sea is a good place for women, but Ethan doesn’t seem to share that point of view.” Gritting her teeth, Charlene summoned up another smile. “No, Ethan likes having the extra help.” A commotion at the docks caught her attention and she was relieved to see Ethan coming aboard. There was no expression on his face as Pogie explained the situation. “I see,” Ethan said in an even tone. Charlene envied his selfcontrol. “Well, we’ll offload all the crab here. It wasn’t the plan, but we’ll deal with it.” The tension between Ken Stabler and Ethan was palpable. Ethan spoke directly to Stabler. “Will there be fines for this one, Ken?” Amazingly, he sounded almost casual. Charlene was impressed. “Oh, I think so. Not too bad if you offload the catch.” Stabler studied his fingernails. “But, as a federal observer, I think I ought to go with you on the rest of this trip.” Pain in her palms made Charlene realize her nails were digging into them. If the observer went with them, how would they search for Kevin? But she could see that Ethan had no choice. Ken Stabler was going to stay aboard. Charlene looked at Ethan, very confused. Almost imperceptibly, he shook his head. When the observer finally walked away to inspect the holding tanks, he answered her silent questions. He leaned down to whisper, his voice low. “That’s the observer who supposedly went with Kevin on the previous trip before your brother disappeared.” “Supposedly?” His green eyes glittered. “I checked. He wasn’t around when Kevin’s boat disappeared. He didn’t ride with Kevin the 68

Heart of the Storm trip before because he was on a different boat. No one bothered to check. I did.” “Do you think he had something to do with The Daughter of Norway’s disappearance?” “I don’t know. I do think it’s strange he boarded us on your first trip.” “You don’t think it’s a coincidence.” Her eyes moved in the direction where the seemingly innocuous observer had disappeared. “No, I don’t.” Ethan looked down at her. “Something didn’t smell right then and something doesn’t smell right now, Charlene.” “What do we do?” “We be careful.” She’d never seen him look so grim. “He looks like any other observer, but I’ve never been able to read him.” Charlene shook her head. “It’s crazy to think that an observer would be involved. It’s more likely that Kevin was involved in something dangerous and got in over his head.” There. She’d said it. The thought that tortured her was that her brother had been doing something illegal and was killed for it. Anger vibrated from Ethan. “Don’t ever say that. You ought to know better than that.” “Really?” She ignored the fact the rest of the crew were on deck listening. Luckily, Stabler had strolled into the galley. “Why? I was nineteen. What did I know about my brother?” His face became a dull red. Charlene wouldn’t have been surprised to see smoke coming out Ethan’s ears. “Then why the hell are you here? Why bother to look for him? He’s just another criminal, right? He doesn’t deserve justice or have the truth come out or anything. You want to believe the worst of him because it’s easier.” 69

Heart of the Storm Her own temper rising to meet his, she defended herself. “I’m here because he was my brother, right or wrong. I think going with some complicated conspiracy theory is stupid. No matter what I find out won’t change the fact I loved him.” “Right. Whatever.” His disbelief was in every syllable. Walking away, anger poured off him and he disappeared into the wheelhouse. Pogie approached her. “You know, Charlie, Ethan isn’t just looking for Kevin for you.” Totally taken aback, she looked at Pogie with wide eyes. “I don’t understand.” “He and Kevin were close. If Kevin was doing something rotten, then Ethan was too, right?” “That makes no sense,” she said firmly. Pogie shrugged. “Around these parts, it’s guilt by association. Your family drug smuggles, you do. Your family cooks the books trying to make an extra buck, so will you. It’s tough to beat that in fishing families.” “Has this come up before?” Her voice was sharp and pressing. She had to know. Pogie seemed to wrestle with the decision to tell her anything. “When Kevin went down, there was a lot of loose talk. Everybody knew that Ethan and Kevin were two peas in a pod. What Kevin did, Ethan followed.” “So, drug smuggling was mentioned and Ethan caught the brand?” “Worse. There were fishermen who didn’t believe that The Daughter of Norway went down by accident.” Appalled, Charlene finally got it. “They thought Ethan scuttled her?” “Drug deal gone bad, friends falling out, nothing new on the docks around here.” Pogie hesitated. “What, Pogie? There’s more. What is it?” 70

Heart of the Storm “The fact that you took off soon after the boat disappeared fueled the talk. They said that you believed Ethan killed your brother and that’s why you left.” Stunned, Charlene could only stand there with her mouth hanging open. “People really said that?” Pogie shrugged. “It’s what people do. They talk. The talk was just starting to die down last few years. Ethan brings in the crab. He makes his crew money. Being a possible murderer didn’t slow him down. I never believed it and any crew member who mentions it gets fired. By me.” His rough voice was harsher and angry. Pogie’s watery blue eyes met hers. “I think he’s more worried about what you think of him, though. If you think Kevin could be a smuggler, Ethan takes it that you think he is.” “That’s ridiculous.” She scoffed at what Pogie was saying, but she knew he was right. Pogie shrugged. “He can’t help who he is, Charlie.” “Thank you, Pogie.” Tears stung the back of her lids. “For the record, that’s not why I left.” “I know that, Charlie. I’m good friends with Barbara Kanook. When I made a less than complimentary reference to you, she ripped me up good. I know you left him because you were afraid he’d die at sea.” A smile made its way to her face. “I’m sorry you had to get ripped up by Barbara. It’s not fun, I know.” Pogie patted her shoulder with his huge hand. “Don’t worry, kiddo. I deserved it. Now that I know you, I’m glad she did it.” He ambled away to get the boat underway. Looking up at the wheelhouse, Charlene knew she had to talk to Ethan and dreaded it. Better get it over with.

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Chapter 8 Climbing up the ladder, Charlene heard voices and stopped outside the slightly ajar door. “I’m not sure I’m buying your reasons for catching this trip, Ken.” Ethan’s voice sounded casual. “I know. It seems odd, but there’ve been some reports that you’re doing unusual fishing.” “You mean somebody told you I’m fudging the numbers.” “I have to check every tip, Ethan.” “I notice you’ve checked every ‘tip’ about me and my crew.” Ethan’s comment was dry. “It’s my job, Captain.” “It’s the only reason you’re still aboard this boat, Stabler. Otherwise, I’d throw you overboard.” The hostility of the statement and the cool tone made Charlene shiver. Stumbling into the wheelhouse to interrupt them before Ethan got himself thrown in Federal prison, she faced the two men. Ken Stabler’s face was red and angry. His eyes were steel and the hatred directed at Ethan took her breath away. “Excuse me, gentlemen. I’m sure you need to inspect the bait, right, Mr. Stabler?” The way the anger and hatred wiped off the observer’s features was frightening. It made Charlene wonder if she’d even seen it. “Quite right, Ms. Henderson. I’d better get down on deck. Ethan, we can go over your books later.” 72

Heart of the Storm For a moment, Ethan and Stabler faced each other. Complete opposites, Charlene noticed how Ethan was large and muscular in comparison to Stabler’s smaller, weaker frame. It was not just the physical differences that became obvious, but they clashed in lifestyle choices. Ethan chose a life of chance and determination. The observer seemed to live the safer, conformed life. The two stared at each other and the tension in the wheelhouse became unbearable. Charlene launched into the middle of the fray. “Mr. Stabler, I think we’re about to cast off. The bait?” For a moment, she worried that the two men wouldn’t back down from each other. With a look of hatred crossing Stabler’s face, the smaller man broke eye contact with Ethan. The way the observer smiled made Charlene’s skin crawl. “Why, yes, of course, Ms. Henderson. Thank you.” He whirled around and stomped down the stairs. Charlene let out her breath, unaware that she’d been holding it. Turning a glare on Ethan, she demanded answers. “What the hell are you doing? How is what just happened being careful? That man hates you, Ethan.” Ethan scraped a hand across the back of his neck. “He rubs me the wrong way.” He almost sounded sulky. “He can find reasons to keep us dockside.” She wanted to be reasonable but her voice was sharp and angry. “Charlene, he boards me every six months or so. He kept me dockside four months ago. I’ve learned to keep meticulous books and my crew in line. Yeah, he hates me. I complained about his methods to the private company he works for and they reprimanded him.” “That’s why he rides you?” “No, he’s been riding me since Kevin’s boat went down.” His eyes didn’t meet hers. 73

Heart of the Storm “Is he one of those idiots who think you scuttled Kevin’s boat?” “So you heard?” Now his gaze bored into hers. “Pogie had to tell me. Why didn’t you tell me people thought all that crap?” Exasperation made her voice louder. “You should have called me when it happened.” “Right.” A wealth of sarcasm was held in that one word. “I should have called you when you left without leaving any word. ‘By the way, Charlie, I know you hate me and my lifestyle but could you come up here and tell these nice folks I’m not a murderer?’ Something like that maybe?” “You could have tried,” she protested. He studied her. There was a look in his eyes she couldn’t decipher. “What difference would that have made?” he asked bitterly. “You’re wrong. I never hated you.” Her words soft and quiet, she tried to calm him. Ethan took a deep breath. “Let’s not do this one again, Charlene. The fact is that I couldn’t have called you. It wasn’t your job to protect me. Let’s just drop it.” “But, Ethan, people still think it, don’t they?” His smile was bitter, heartbreaking. “Sure. I can’t change what they think.” “Can’t we try?” “People don’t forget the past so easily, Charlene,” he said quietly. “Don’t I know it.” “It’s not always a bad thing. Sometimes people remember the times they were happy.” Hope flooded her heart. Could he remember how good it was between them? Could he forget what she did? “I’m sorry I left you the way I did, Ethan.” 74

Heart of the Storm “I’m sorry you left me at all.” His voice changed. Now, it was low and tender. Ethan took a step toward her. It was like being stalked by a tiger. Part of Charlene was thrilled, even as the sensible part told her to run. Indecision filled her mind. Part of her wanted to convince him to stay away. Her body and her heart wanted him to live up to the promises in his eyes. “You became a captain.” “That would have happened anyway. You could have made the climb to the captain’s chair a lot more pleasant.” He backed her up another step. “I was too young.” She tried to be firm. The smile on his face made her nervous and she backed up more. “You’re not now,” he growled. As Ethan backed her into the door to the galley, she could have stopped him. Mouth dry, she ran out of words to say to him. Finally she said, “What about your rules? You don’t want to get all tangled up with me. How do you know I won’t leave again?” Her voice shook with desperation. Her breath caught as he moved in closer. “I’ll take that risk.” He bent his head down to hers as his hands wandered to her butt. “How does it feel, Charlene, to know that a man will risk his sanity for you?” With his mouth just a whisper away from her mouth, he paused and said slowly, “I’m not stopping. I plan to kiss you senseless and make love to you. They could pound on the door. They could tell me we’re sinking. But I’m not stopping until I have you, Charlene Henderson.” He seemed to wait for a split second, but she knew she wasn’t going to stop him. She only knew if he didn’t kiss her, she was going to die. Wanting him had become as much a part of her as breathing. The instant before his kiss seared her, she managed, “Yes.” 75

Heart of the Storm His kiss was possessive, branding. His hands were rough and impatient with her clothing and his own. Buttons flew and cotton ripped as his hands tore at their clothing. She barely noticed that she’d never be able to wear her bra again. She didn’t care. Up against the door, she moaned and arched against him and his hands, begging for more. He broke the kiss, only to pull her with him as he sat down in the chair with her sprawled over him. The feel of his naked body against her was overwhelming. He buried his face in the valley between her breasts. “You smell exactly the same,” he murmured. “It’s lavender soap,” she whispered. “What?” He met her eyes. “Lavender soap. I’ve always used it.” The heat in his green eyes seared into her, branding her, melting her. “That’s not the smell I mean.” His fingers found her sensitive folds and he put two of them slowly into her slick channel as he slowly rubbed slightly above her entrance. She couldn’t breathe. His voice was in her ear. “I smell you. I see you in my dreams. You’re in me so deep, I can’t get free.” Vibrations spread through her and she rubbed against his fingers. “God, you feel so wet and so good.” Sensations tumbled through her. Sitting astride him, his face pressed against her breast, his fingers stroking her, she was so hot for him. But there was more. She never wanted anyone the way she always wanted him. Reaching down, she captured his stiff length in her hand and wrapped her fingers around him gently. She reveled in the sound of his breath hissing in at her touch. He captured one of her nipples in his mouth, and it was her turn to gasp with pleasure. Arching her back, she drove his fingers deeper inside of her. 76

Heart of the Storm With a muffled curse, he pulled his fingers out and lifted her so his erection was at her entrance. “Do it!” she hissed at him. “Do it now.” He looked up into her eyes, the tip of him just inside her. “No.” With that one word, he wrapped his arm around her and stood. He whipped her around and she found herself face down in front of the captain’s chair, her hands grasping its rungs. He stood behind her, and she could feel his hardness pressed against the back of her leg. He caressed her bottom and then reached around to touch her very sensitive spot, slowly stoking fires within her. “I want more. And when I’m done, I’ll want it again. It’s been eight years of waiting, Charlie. I’ve got eight years of yearning I have to make up for. I’m not rushing any of it.” The sound of his voice, the stroking of his fingers sent her reeling as sensations overwhelmed her. His hands were everywhere and he kissed her neck and down her spine. She felt his tongue scrape her ear and he bit her earlobe. Her answering moan echoed his. But she wasn’t going to let him do all the torturing. Sliding down off the chair, she twisted her body, until she knelt in front of him with his erect penis directly in front her mouth. As she glided over him, he fisted his hands in her hair. “Jesus, Charlie. You’re killing me.” She smiled even as she sucked harder on him. His movements became less controlled, frantic. He pulled himself out of her mouth. “No. I’m not going to come in your mouth. I want to slam into you again and again until you squeeze me dry.” His words caused fresh heat to spill from her and he lifted her up, his hands under her arms, until her legs were around his waist. He turned them both to sit back in the captain’s chair; he lowered her onto him slowly. Just the feel of him sent her over the edge as his fingers pulled on her nub. 77

Heart of the Storm Coming out of a fog, she registered that he was still sweating to hang onto his own release. She leaned down and whispered, “Let me have it, Ethan. Give it to me.” She felt him surge upwards again and again as she crested higher and higher. When he finally let go, the force of his release pushed her spiraling, chanting his name. When Charlene finally floated back to reality, Ethan was holding her tightly murmuring how beautiful, how sexy, how wonderful she was as he kissed her face, her neck, her shoulders. Buried deep inside her, contractions continued to stroke him and she barely noticed when he lifted her up and carried her to his berth a short distance from the captain’s chair. As if she were a fragile gift, Ethan laid her on his berth and looked into her eyes. His own thoughts were scattered and disjointed. This woman was the only one he would ever love and even if she refused to stay with him, making love to her was a precious honor he wasn’t about to pass up. If his lifestyle drove her away, he would live on the memories of this one moment in time. After all, he lived on little more for the last eight years. Once, he’d let her walk away and his heart had never recovered. This time, he would do what he could to keep her with him. After all, letting her go hadn’t worked. He had to try, even if she left him again. Her eyes were cloudy and her lips were wet from his kisses. Buried inside her, he felt the small tremors that still shook her as he touched his lips to her cheeks, her neck, her shoulders. Her hands clasped him close around his waist and the feeling of her nails digging into his skin made him growl with renewed hunger. He knew he was going to suffer for these stolen moments, but he wanted her too much to care. Pulling out gently, he began to slowly explore all of her, getting to know every curve denied him for so long. Her back arched as he bit on one nipple tenderly as his palm rubbed the other. Barely able to focus on 78

Heart of the Storm any one thought, he almost didn’t hear her as she murmured softly. “No one could ever touch me the way you do, Ethan. In all these years, I never wanted anyone the way I want you.” Her hands curled in his hair, stroking his scalp. Her voice was low and husky, causing his phallus to jerk in response. Nothing affected him the way her voice always did. He loved her body. He loved making love to her, but it was her voice that haunted him day and night. He looked up at her. “Tell me, Charlie. Tell me how you want me. Don’t stop talking.” “Oh my God.” Her hips moved against him, causing sweet friction to increase his dimensions even more. “I love your hands on me. Your mouth is the only one that’s ever made me crazy. I want you so much I could come just thinking about you.” On and on her voice wove a spell of desire around him until going slow went out the window. With rough hands, he pushed her up his bed until his mouth was a breath away from the jewel he sought. It was a jewel. Hard, priceless and all his at that moment. Dragging his teeth over that place first, she jerked violently and her muscles tensed. She was honey and spice, just as she had been the first time. The taste of her surrounded him, invaded his senses and he thrust his tongue in to taste more. Wild and thrashing, she writhed underneath him, making him hard and ready. When she cried out again, he loomed over her, reveling in the heat from her body and the sweat he saw sliding off her breasts. “Now and forever, Charlie. Say it!” He demanded it, just as he had eight years earlier. He needed it. Even if it was a lie. Sobbing and desperate, she rubbed frantically against him. “Now and forever, Ethan. Always.” Her hips stilled and her eyes opened. They were clear and honest. The look in them drove Ethan beyond his limit and he slammed into her again and again. 79

Heart of the Storm “Charlie!” His voice was hoarse. Lost in her, he felt the moment she unraveled and as she pulsed around him, he exploded. The only sound was their harsh breathing.

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Chapter 9 What the hell just happened? He’d lost control of everything. The power he just handed her was immeasurable. She would now know that he loved her and always had. Demanding “now and forever” was the nail in his emotional coffin. There was no way to fix this. She would leave him and he would be empty. All the euphoria of having her drifted away and a cold rock settled in his stomach. Warily, he watched her open her eyes and waited for the sign that she would thank him for the great sex and walk away. God, she was beautiful. “Captain, we’re ready to get underway.” The radio crackling made them both jump. With great care, he eased himself away from her. For one second more, he stared into her beautiful, brown eyes. Then he answered the radio. “Okay. I’ll start her up in a couple of minutes. Did Stabler inspect the bait?” “Yeah. He says it’s fine.” Pogie’s voice sounded dry. “Okay.” Silently, Ethan and Charlene got dressed. There was no awkwardness between them, but both retreated into themselves. For Ethan it was over when she walked off the plane and he knew it. The love he had for her had only gotten stronger. He was lucky to have gotten to touch her again. Knowing she might 81

Heart of the Storm leave him was killing him, but he wouldn’t hold her to him if she didn’t want to stay. Realizing she had been lying to herself, Charlene knew now that she would be Ethan’s forever. Words spoken eight years earlier had new and terrible meaning in her heart. Life without Ethan was bleak and unhappy. Would life with him be as tragic? The fear of being left a widow, after watching her mother lose a son to the Bering Sea, overwhelmed her. Painfully, a scene with from the past pressed forward in her mind. Charlene had seen her mother and father fight before. Their relationship was always pretty rocky, but this was worse. Being in love with Ethan meant she just couldn’t understand how people in love could say horrible, destructive things to each other. Standing out on her front porch, frozen, she heard her mother ripping into her father relentlessly. “It’s your fault. He’s dead because of you. You taught him to fish when I wanted him to go to college.” Her mother’s tone was vicious and angry. Charlene shook her head when her father attempted to calm the waters. “Mona, he chose to follow in my footsteps. I didn’t force him to go.” “You never stopped him. All these years, I’ve sat around this boring, quaint little town waiting for you to come home from your fishing trips. Now, Kevin is gone and you killed him.” Mona’s voice was cold, not sad at all. Charlene was confused. Didn’t her mother feel any sorrow over Kevin’s death? Bull Henderson was obviously grief-stricken. “He was my son too, Mona. I loved him and I miss him too.” “You killed him. It was your ego. You’re even trying to drag Charlene into this. What are you going to do about Ethan Shannon? He’s screwing our little girl.” 82

Heart of the Storm Charlene held her breath. Her father surprised her. “Leave her alone, Mona. She’s had enough of your pushing her.” From the porch, she heard a crack like a whip that startled her. Her father said, with sadness in his voice, “Did that make you feel better, Mona? Hitting me isn’t going to make this all go away.” “You’re right. What would make me feel better is if you dropped dead.” Charlene couldn’t listen anymore. Her stomach churned with fear and anger toward her mother. She couldn’t bring herself to go into the house. Running from the porch, she headed for safety. Ethan. Tears poured down her face as she drove away, feeling as if she had lost more than a brother. Her family, as she knew it, was gone. She had listened to her mother. There was no way she was going to end up hating Ethan, waiting for him to come home, having children who would die. She thought he would give it up for her. He loved her. Charlene realized her mother had influenced her every step of the way. Fear of becoming her mother made her run from Ethan. What she knew now was that she couldn’t have a family and loving intimacy with anyone else. She studied the man she loved. What was he thinking now? He told her that if she slept with him that she’d have to stick. Charlene wondered if he meant it. Did she want to stick? Wouldn’t it be better to be alone than to lose him? Back and forth her mind scrambled. Inside, she knew she had little choice about her feelings for him. Loving him was like breathing. As she turned to go down to the galley, he took her arm. “We need to talk, Charlene.” His voice was gentle but firm. Turning her face away so he wouldn’t see the confusion and misery her own thoughts created, she nodded. “I know. We will.” She escaped down the steps. 83

Heart of the Storm Stepping out on deck, she found the crew scrambling to get the boat moving. The observer was still looking over the bait carefully. Cal and Jamie were cleaning up lines and getting the deck ready for dropping more pots. Pogie and Gabriel were smoking out of the wind by the galley door. “Are we ready to push off?” Hands in her pockets, she felt the wind rip through her. “I don’t know. Are we?” Pogie’s voice was neutral and he didn’t look at her. Gabriel on the other hand, had a huge grin on his face as he looked at Charlie. She knew she must be flushed and dreamy-eyed. Softly, Gabriel said to her, “I don’t think Charlie would be down here if we weren’t ready to leave, do you, Pogie?” Laughter was in his voice. Heat spread across her face. “I don’t know what you mean, Gabriel.” Gabriel laughed out loud. The crew all turned at the sound. The deckhand didn’t laugh very much, so they all looked surprised. “Don’t worry, mi amiga. We all know that you hold the captain’s heart. Most of us think it’s a good thing.” Flicking away his cigarette, Gabriel went into the galley. Charlie faced Pogie. “You don’t think it’s a good thing.” The older man rubbed an impatient hand over his grizzled face. “I don’t know, Charlie. If you were out for more than just a quick lay, I’d be just as happy as the rest of these shmucks. Ethan is a fisherman. Even if you crammed him in a suit and made him go to some soulless corporate job, he’d still be a fisherman. Frankly, I think you’ll hurt him.” “You think I want to change him?” “No, but I think you’ll leave him.” A big hand landed on her shoulder and gave it a pat. “Don’t worry, Charlie. I’m an old man and I could be wrong. Maybe he won’t care.” 84

Heart of the Storm They both knew he would care. Thoughts tumbled through her mind. Should she stay with Ethan, the only man she ever loved, or should she back away and leave him alone? The smoke from Pogie’s cigarette floated in front of her as he sat quietly, letting her think. “Pogie, did you know my mother?” He took a long drag before he answered. “I knew her.” The flat tone in his voice spoke his dislike of her. Charlie sighed. “She hated fishing. The noise, the men, the smell, all of it made her sick. I could never figure out why she married Dad in the first place. All she ever did was complain to him when he left and cry while he was gone. When he’d get home she’d stay mad for days. It was miserable for the both of them.” “Charlie, there was more to it than that.” Pogie’s voice was gentle. “I know that.” Nodding, she clenched her hands together. “He cheated on her, didn’t he?” Pogie sighed. “Yes, that’s what I heard. It was a mistake she never forgave him for. The point is, Charlie, you are not your mother and Ethan isn’t your father.” “Did you know I can’t even bear to be around her, Pogie? She’s so bitter and angry. Kevin’s death destroyed her and I couldn’t even feel sorry for her. She’s furious with me for staying in L.A. instead of moving to Seattle, where she is.” “Being a fisherman’s wife is more than just being alone when they’re at sea, Charlie. It’s about being able to steal precious moments and make them last. When they’re home, fishermen are broody, restless and difficult. When they’re gone, you miss them and they miss you. Sometimes it’s raising kids alone. In return, they give you everything they have without question.” Pogie had a faraway look in his eyes, looking out to the horizon. 85

Heart of the Storm “My dad didn’t.” She hated the bitterness that tinged her voice. “Your dad slipped. It was when you kids were little and your mom started to hate fishing. She wanted to move to a bigger city with more to do. But Bull Henderson lived all his life in Anacortes and he wasn’t moving.” Pogie hesitated. “Go on, Pogie. Neither of them ever told me what happened.” “When you kids were little, they had a big fight. Your mom left, took you kids to his mom’s in Seattle and went to San Francisco. For three weeks, your dad, your grandma, nobody knew where Mona was. Your dad was convinced she’d left him. At least, that’s what he told himself. He got good and drunk and woke up with another woman.” Pogie tossed his cigarette away. “Probably that would have been the end of it. Mona came home, Bull took her back and life went on. But Bull made his second mistake. He confessed his slip to Mona. She never forgave him or trusted him again. Bull felt he owed it to her to take it, so he did. Until he died. Bull loved your mother, but she hated his fishing.” “What if I am like my mother, Pogie?” He snorted. “You love the ocean. The Bering Sea is your home. Anyone can see that. The question isn’t whether you’re like your mother, Charlie. The question is whether you’re like Bull. He was a risk taker, a dreamer. He was one of the most courageous men I ever knew. And he stuck. If he said he was going to do something, he did it.” As Pogie stabbed out his cigarette and went back to work, Charlene stared at the white-tipped waves rolling across the skyline. Could she stick to Ethan Shannon? Whether she let go of past resentments or not, could she walk away again? The relentless wind blew across her face, stinging her cheeks. She was Bull Henderson’s daughter. Her father went 86

Heart of the Storm after what he wanted no matter what the cost. In the past, Charlene had viewed her father through the eyes of her mother. Drilled into her brain were the bitter words Mona Henderson always spoke about her father’s love of the ocean. That love was inside Charlene. As much as she was her mother’s daughter, she was Bull’s child too. Maybe that made all the difference in the world. **** The next few hours were busy and Charlene didn’t have a chance to talk to Ethan. As she got into her berth that night, thoughts of the passion she found in Ethan’s arms and Pogie’s words dominated her thoughts. She admitted to herself that her thoughts were confused, but not her feelings. Loving Ethan Shannon was all she knew. No one took his place in her heart. The rest of her life seemed empty in comparison. The questions didn’t stop, though. Could she stay with him? Would their pasts ever let them alone? Once, she had put her own selfish needs before his and then ran away. Now he had a career and a life that she was not part of and staying might interfere in that. What right did she have to come back after all these years and turn his world upside down? She would walk away now, before it was too painful, and leave him alone. All she brought him was pain and trouble. To let him go seemed the best thing for him. She got up knowing she wouldn’t be able to sleep until she talked to Ethan. Up in the wheelhouse, Ethan’s head was bent over his charts plotting their course toward the northern waters. “Ethan.” She was trying to speak quietly. What she had to say, she didn’t want the crew to hear. She stepped aside as he tried to take her in his arms to kiss her. “I have to talk to you.” It was breaking her heart to see the confused hurt in his eyes, so 87

Heart of the Storm she looked at her feet. “I think it would be best if we didn’t get involved.” All expression left his face as if it were wiped away. “Why is that, Charlene?” She struggled to find the words to say what was in her heart. He was very still and she couldn’t read what he was feeling on his face. Glancing up from her feet, she tried to figure out a way to soften the blow. “You’re a fisherman, Ethan. It’s your first love. I don’t want to get in the way.” She looked back down at her feet. “So, if I weren’t a fisherman, you’d stay with me?” There was no emotion in his voice. He might have been saying the weather was fine. Her heart twisted. What did Pogie say? “Even if you crammed him in a suit and made him work at some soulless job, he’d still be a fisherman.” “No, Ethan. I think we should just call it quits.” I can’t cry. I can’t cry. He’ll know I’m lying. God, I love him. She closed her eyes. “I see.” His voice was quiet. “And earlier today, when we made love? What was that?” “Call it closure,” she said. “We put an ending to a sad story.” For a moment, she wondered if he knew she was lying. He looked at her, as if trying to see into her soul. Then, his shoulders slumped and he turned away from her. “Alright, Charlene. I can’t change how you feel.” “Neither can I, Ethan.” You have no idea. I’ll love him all my life and he’ll never know. She turned to leave when Ethan grabbed her arm and yanked her around. “You want to give up, then give up. But I want you to remember what you’re missing for a long time.” With that, he pulled her against him and devoured her mouth. Drowning, she 88

Heart of the Storm reached up and grabbed his shoulders to stay upright. Earlier, he had been passionate and gentle. This kiss was bruising, letting her know the depth of his anguish and pain. She almost whimpered against him. He stopped when her tears touched his face. “Charlene–” he started. She whipped around and ran for the safety of her bed. She fell into an uneasy sleep with no answers. Charlene came awake with a start. She realized that the boat was unusually still. There wasn’t the rocking that had lulled her to a fitful sleep earlier. It became clear that the boat’s engines were off. Since they were supposed to be in the middle of a string, it was very odd. She sat up in her bunk and looked at her travel clock. Three in the morning. Had the crew decided to call it a day? When she made them their last meal only three hours ago, there seemed to be no plan to stop during the night. Pulling on a sweatshirt and cramming her feet into her boots, she got up and walked toward the galley. Then she heard voices from the wheelhouse. “Who’s going to believe anything else, Shannon? You’re the captain who everyone knows is doing something illegal. Why else would the federal observer always be riding you?” “The crew doesn’t know anything. Why don’t you let them go?” “Because I need them to take care of my business. You really made it easy for me, Shannon.” Stabler’s voice was smooth and oily. He sounded triumphant. “You pissed off your first mate and I get to kill two birds with one stone. I get to take another boat for my little arms deal and you get to take the fall for it.” Charlene looked out toward the galley and saw Cal Hendricks with a shotgun aimed at Pogie, Gabriel and Jamie. 89

Heart of the Storm “Come on in, Charlie, and join the party.” Though he didn’t take his eyes off the three men, the command in his voice told her she had no choice. “What are you doing, Cal?” Her heart was beating fast. “I’m giving myself a promotion.” His genial face was hard and angry. “As long as Ethan Shannon was in charge, I wasn’t going to see the captain’s chair. I’ve decided to change my odds.” Her eyes met Pogie’s. The imperceptible shake of his head made her sit down quietly. Jamie’s head was bent, staring at his boots. Pogie still had his socks on and mussed hair as if he’d just woken up. Gabriel was smoking a cigarette, his relaxed posture seemingly very calm. Cal’s blue eyes that seemed so friendly and warm before were cold and calculating. He eyed her very intently. “I didn’t figure you for a stupid woman, but when you started screwing the captain, I decided I was wrong.” He sneered at her. “Of course, you wouldn’t be the first woman to sleep with the top man for a job, would you?” His laughter was maniacal. “I was just looking for my brother.” She was proud that her tone was even and didn’t shake. “Ken told me all about Jack Dory. If he’d just kept his mouth shut, you could have walked away. He’s a dead man, you know.” His voice was so casual. “Nothing like being an arms trader to get to know the right people to take care of little problems like that.” Charlene noticed that Jamie raised his head to look at Cal. The hatred she saw there was intense. When Cal turned his attention to Pogie, she shook her head slightly to warn Jamie to keep quiet. “Well, old man, this is the end of the line for you.” There was a smirk on his face. He addressed the small group. “Do you know that this old man actually told me to be patient?” His 90

Heart of the Storm grating laughter cut through the small enclosed area and Pogie winced. “He told me that I’d get to be the captain, since he was pretty sure Ethan was retiring soon. Ha! He was pretty sure. What a joke.” “That’s what he told us, Cal.” Gabriel’s soft voice spoke up. Cal whipped around on Gabriel with his shotgun pointed at the deckhand’s head. “Who cares? I can get more money right now than I’d ever get being a captain of a crab boat. Ken is going to make sure I walk away a rich man. No more Bering Sea. No more freezing work. I would have settled for a high line boat, but I’ll take my cut of this little business.” Ken Stabler stepped into the galley from the wheelhouse. “Talking again, Cal?” “Just setting the record straight, Ken.” Charlene suppressed a shudder at the look on Cal’s face. Killer. She looked into the steel grey eyes that studied the group of them. “Where’s Ethan?” She held her breath. Was he dead? Stabler waited a long moment before answering as if he wanted to torture her. “He’s driving the boat. I’ve convinced him that he needs to follow my directions.” “How did you convince him?” Keeping her voice even, Charlene tried to stay calm. “Very easily. I told him exactly what I would do to you if he didn’t cooperate.” The smile he gave her raised the hair on the back of her neck. Pogie had no expression on his face. Gabriel’s eyes narrowed and Jamie looked murderous. Cal threw back his head and laughed. “Look at that, Ken. They’re all pissed off that you threatened their little cook. Do you know what your little cook is, boys? She’s a fake. Did you know she hates fishermen? She hates them so much that she dumped Ethan rather than be a crab fisherman’s wife.” He shifted the gun to point at her. “She’ll screw him. She’ll suck him dry. But she won’t put up with 91

Heart of the Storm anything to do with fishing. That’s your cutie here. She’s here for one reason. She wants to know if her brother was a drug dealer or not.” Though tears stung her eyes, Charlene was not going to cry in front of these monsters. It was true, wasn’t it? All of it was true. She couldn’t even deny it, but she wasn’t going to hang her head. “I’m not the one holding a gun, Cal. You are. As the daughter of a fisherman, I can tell you that they don’t forget when someone betrays them.” Cal’s smile was cold. “They may not forget, but they’ll be thinking about it in a watery grave. That’s where your brother is. That’s where you and this crew will be.” Stabler broke in. “That’s enough, Cal. We’ll need them to do some of the work.” Pogie finally spoke. “If we’re going to die, why would we bother to help you do anything, you rat bastard?” Stabler’s eyes bored into Pogie’s face. “There’s all kinds of ways to die, Pogie. You can go with a bullet in the brain or a lot of bruises and a few broken bones. Believe me, Cal would enjoy making this difficult for you.” “Oh yeah. Or you can all watch while I have a little fun with Miss Uptight here.” Cal moved closer to Charlene. “Ken, put a leash on your dog.” Ethan’s harsh voice came from the doorway to the wheelhouse. The anger came off him in waves and his eyes glittered with violence. Stabler looked at him mildly. Without taking his eyes off Ethan, he spoke to Cal. “Let’s keep everything polite, Cal. There’ll be plenty of time for playtime later.” Charlene squirmed under Cal’s hot perusal of her. With her eyes, she warned Ethan to back off the dangerous man. Ethan’s face was unreadable. “Do you have the course set?” Stabler demanded. 92

Heart of the Storm “Yes. We’ll be at the coordinates in about three hours.” Ethan’s voice was steady, the anger from only a moment earlier seemed to be under control. “Did you send the ‘mayday’ message I told you to send?” Those steel grey eyes studied each of the crew in the galley. “I sent it.” There was no defeat in Ethan’s voice. There was no expression at all. Very casually, Stabler leaned against the wall of the galley and looked at the captive crew. “Let me explain what’s going to happen. I need this boat to run some cargo into Russian territory where I have a very important buyer meeting me. Thanks to Jack Dory, I can’t use my usual methods, so you can thank him for your present predicament.” His smile was predatory. “I need you to run the boat to get there. I’ll keep Ms. Henderson in the stateroom just so you’ll cooperate.” “How did you get my brother to cooperate with you?” Charlene tried to keep the anger from her voice, but from the warning look she got from Ethan, she knew it failed. “Oh, that was easy, Ms. Henderson.” Studying a fingernail, Stabler didn’t look at her. “Ross Perry shot his best friend, Jason. If Kevin didn’t cooperate, Jason was going to die. That got his speedy cooperation.” Clenching her hands, Charlene was afraid she was going to lose her temper. The only thing that kept her from flying at Stabler’s face was the fear he would kill the crew if she did. “Unfortunately, I wasn’t there to oversee that transaction. I know the cargo made it to the buyer, but I don’t know what happened after that. I have a feeling that the buyers didn’t like the way the transaction was handled and killed everyone on the boat.” The floor seemed to fall away from her and spin. An involuntary movement from Ethan made her try and focus on his face. It was the only way she could keep from passing out. The 93

Heart of the Storm concern and pain mixed on his face made her straighten her spine and try and hide the shock and fear that burned inside her. “I didn’t see any bodies, though, so maybe I’m wrong. But knowing Kevin Henderson, I’m sure he managed to get himself killed.” Tears began to swim in Charlene’s eyes, but she blinked them away and kept her gaze on Ethan. He seemed to be begging her to hold it together. “So, Ms. Henderson, I need you to go into the stateroom and stay there. The crew will make sure the boat stays afloat and your captain will head us in the right direction. When we get to our destination, I’ll let you know what you need to do next.” That creepy, crooked smile showed again. “I’m sure we’ll have no trouble.” As Charlene stood to walk to the stateroom, her eyes met Ethan’s. There was tenderness, desire and fear all swirling around in them. Ignoring the handgun aimed at her by Stabler, she walked up to Ethan and put her hand on his face. “Don’t worry, Ethan. I’ll be okay.” His large hand reached up to hold hers to his cheek and he kissed the inside of her wrist, but he didn’t say anything out loud. Stabler took her arm roughly and escorted her to the stateroom.

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Chapter 10 Three hours felt like an eternity, and so far Ethan had kept his cool and not pushed Ken Stabler’s face down his throat, but he knew he was running out of time. Hendricks kept the gun on the crew and Stabler forced Ethan back up to the wheelhouse. With his hands on the throttle, he checked the gauges. They still had fuel and the engine was holding up even though Stabler demanded a breakneck speed to get to their location. The small man kept a tense watch on Ethan, silently threatening him with a pistol aimed at the captain’s side. The anticipation in the wheelhouse was suffocating. Keeping the compass set northwest, Ethan ran the boat to their destination in Russian waters. Peering out the window, the darkness was pierced by bright lights. They had arrived at the coordinates Stabler gave to him. Ethan could see a huge drag boat with its lights shining off the surface of the restless sea. Time was up. “Turn off the engine and go down to the galley.” Stabler’s eyes were on the boat. Ethan killed the engine. “Do you want me to drop anchor or drift?” “We’re leaving soon, so just let her drift.” Stabler pointed the handgun at Ethan’s knee. “I would love to just put a bullet in both your knees. You could still pilot the boat with a few bullets in you, but that’s probably what Ross Perry thought when he put a bullet in Jason Iverson.” 95

Heart of the Storm Barely keeping hold of his temper, Ethan struggled to remain still. For reasons he couldn’t fathom, Stabler was baiting him with references to his childhood friend’s death. For Charlene’s sake, he stayed silent. Stabler had the key to her stateroom and he and Cal were armed. An experienced captain, Ethan knew how to be patient. Precious moments were ticking by, but he knew he had to wait for his chance to free himself and his crew. So far, Stabler hadn’t let down his guard and Ethan’s fear for his crew and Charlene kept him obeying Stabler’s orders. Ethan had to wait. The guy was still talking. “You’d think that since I’m the one with the weapons that my Russian buyer would come over on this boat. I’m sorry to say that he believes that having the money gives him the power.” Silence was the only response Ethan could give and stay alive. His tongue was sore and bleeding from biting it to stay quiet. As Stabler backed up to the doorway at the stairs, he shouted over his shoulder, “Cal, get ready to meet our Russian friends.” Stabler pointed the gun at Ethan’s head. “Downstairs. Now.” Slowly, Ethan walked down the stairs into the galley with the rest of his crew. Jamie was tense, staring with hatred at Cal Hendricks. Pogie was smoking and Gabriel was sitting quietly as if he hadn’t moved for the three hours since the hijacking began. “Are we going to let Charlie out now?” Pogie asked Stabler. “Sure. Let’s have the whole gang here.” Stabler’s jubilance was grating on Ethan. When the stateroom was unlocked, Ethan could see her tired, frightened face. Her brown hair was falling in her face, her soft brown eyes looked haunted and when they met his, her whole body relaxed. He realized she’d been scared for him. No 96

Heart of the Storm matter what she told him, Charlene cared about him. The love he felt for her just about burst through his chest. “Well, now, everyone present?” Stabler’s voice dripped with honey. “Here’s what’s going to happen. I’m going over to that Russian boat where all the lovely money is located and make the deal. When I’m done, you three men are going to help unload my cargo. To keep you behaving nicely, Cal here is going to keep this shotgun on you. Play nice, and remember, the Bering Sea will kill you in three minutes at this time of year.” He staggered over the side of the boat into a life raft he had made the crew lower for him earlier and headed over to the huge Russian craft. Cal smiled as he sat back in a chair with his shotgun aimed at Charlene. “I didn’t think it would be this easy. I guess I believed you were all tougher than you really were. You turned out to be nothing special.” His blue eyes flicked over Jamie with contempt. “Especially you, greenhorn. I don’t know why you thought you could be a crab fisherman. You haven’t got the guts.” Cal didn’t look to see Jamie’s reaction. That was a mistake. The gun wavered as Jamie let out a wild yell of frustration. Cal didn’t have time to shoot him when the frantic, angry deckhand ploughed into him, knocking him to the floor. Ethan was up in a heartbeat and grabbed the shotgun. Pogie put a hand on his arm. “No. The kid has been taking a lot of crap from that bastard. Let Jamie take care of him.” “Yes,” Gabriel added, standing beside Ethan. “Though I would like a hand in this myself, let Jamie beat him.” Charlene watched as Jamie and Cal wrestled and fought. Though the first mate looked bigger and stronger, Jamie held his own using wiry strength. Blows were exchanged so quickly Charlene couldn’t keep track. Cal landed a cheap shot on the 97

Heart of the Storm side of Jamie’s head, but Jamie came back with a blow to Cal’s stomach. Doubled over, Cal tried to catch his breath as Jamie slammed his fist into Cal’s chin knocking him out. Then it was all over. Breathing heavily, Jamie stood over him. “That tough enough for you?” “Nice job, Greenhorn.” Pogie slapped him on the back. “What now, Ethan?” Charlene asked. “We have to get the boat moving.” He headed for the wheelhouse. Instantly, the rest of the crew scattered. But just as they started to get in position to leave, the life raft appeared at the port side of the boat and four men climbed aboard The Celtic Rose. Ethan grabbed Charlene’s hand and headed for the wheelhouse. “Hide,” he whispered. Charlene only had a moment to pray the rest of the crew were able to hide from the men boarding the vessel. She only had a glimpse of Jamie scurrying swiftly to the engine room. Gabriel and Pogie were nowhere to be seen. Ethan yanked her by the hand. There aren’t many places to hide on a crab boat. As swiftly as possible, Charlene and Ethan flew up the stairs and he pulled down a piece of plywood that covered a small cubby above his bed. He boosted her up just as she heard Ken Stabler’s voice down in the galley. “You worthless idiot. Get up,” they heard Stabler say to Cal. In a louder voice he said, “Fan out and search for them. Take out the radio too. I should have done that immediately after making contact with you.” Footsteps sounded on the stairs. There was a very small space between the bed and the partition separating it from the wheelhouse and Ethan squeezed into it. A shadow came into the wheelhouse, illuminated by the incoming light of coming dawn. Charlene peeked out from her 98

Heart of the Storm hiding place and fear skittered along her nerves at the sight of the man who dominated the wheelhouse. Bearded, tall and muscled, he seemed predatory and dangerous. When she saw his eyes illuminated by the morning sun, she almost fell out of the small cubby hole in surprise. It was Kevin. The unusual color of his eyes gave him away. Violet blue, they were scanning the wheelhouse. His eyes were the only recognizable feature. The man who used to be her brother wore a knit cap but she saw tufts of blonde hair peaking out from the bottom. His face looked hard as granite and his hands held a wicked looking automatic weapon. Even his stance was different. In shock and panic, she caught Ethan’s gaze and he looked at her, a silent question in his eyes. He mouthed, “What’s wrong?” Confusion swept through her as she tried to form the words to tell Ethan what she was seeing. Kevin was alive and working for a Russian who was buying weapons from a scumbag like Ken Stabler. Ice ran through her veins. The brother she knew was gone and replaced by this monstrous-looking person. He was alive and sent to kill her. Whatever was left of her world slipped away with a crash and her last vision was Ethan reaching out to catch her as she fell from her hiding place, giving away his presence to her brother. The look in Charlene’s eyes caused Ethan to go still. There was pain and shock. What did she see? With horror, he watched as her eyes rolled to the back of her head. She was losing consciousness. Whatever she had seen had shocked her into a dead faint. As she began to slip out of the cubby hole, he knew he had to catch her and then the pig sent to kill him would have him. Without thinking, he reached out, dropping the shotgun, and caught her before she hit her head on the board around his bed. 99

Heart of the Storm He placed her on the bed and turned to face his adversary. When he saw the man’s face, he realized why Charlene had been shocked into oblivion. Here was his best friend. This was the man who Ethan scoured the Bering Sea looking for. Here he was, working for the Russians, buying illegal weapons. Anger flooded him and he stepped toward the man. “Wait.” Definitely Kevin’s voice. Eight years hadn’t changed that. “I know how it looks, but it’s not what you think.” Hesitation stilled Ethan. Kevin looked down the stairs to the galley. In a very low voice, he went on. “I can’t explain now. Get back behind the partition and get her up in the cubby.” Then he stomped down the stairs. Straining his ears, Ethan heard, “There is no one in the wheelhouse.” Charlene’s brother, rattled off in Russian to the other men. Kevin didn’t know Russian, did he? When Charlene stirred, he looked up and put a finger to his lips. She nodded, wide-eyed and frightened. Ethan listened intently trying to hear the voices from the galley. “Find them.” Stabler’s voice was impatient and angry. “Cal is still unconscious and I have to go take that sample to your boss. You find those bastards.” Footsteps came up the stairs again from the galley. The man stood at the door to the wheelhouse and whispered, “Listen. I don’t have much time.” He kept his gun and his gaze toward the stairs to the galley. “I’ve been undercover for the FSB for the last eight years trying to catch the guy who gave the orders that killed Jason and sank my boat.” Briefly, those familiar eyes met Ethan’s. “I don’t care if you believe me. I just want you to stay out of my way so I can stop him.” “What the hell is FSB?” Ethan whispered back. 100

Heart of the Storm “The Russian Federal Security Service. They stop illegal arms trading and this is their baby. I had to go deep undercover as an American who knows Russian. I have one FSB agent also undercover with me and we’re taking them down tonight. Stay here and you won’t get hurt.” Ethan hissed, “Let us help you.” “No! You have to get my sister home. She never should have been here.” His violet blue eyes flashed. “What were you thinking?” “It’s been a while, friend. Your sister doesn’t take orders,” Ethan said dryly. “You’re the captain. You should have kept her out of this.” Ethan’s eyes narrowed. “You’re being an asshole.” “Knock it off, you two,” Charlene broke in. “We need to get out of here. Hello! Bad guys, guns. Now is not the time to argue about stuff that’s already happened.” Dropping down lightly, she faced her brother. “How many are on board and what guns do they have?” Opening his mouth to protest, Ethan took one look at his woman’s face and shut it. She was looking at her brother and the anger Ethan saw there was intense. She was pissed off. Shooting a glance at Kevin, he noticed her brother was oblivious to her anger. “There are three others with me. Two are gun runners. One is another undercover agent. They’re loaded with AKs and shotguns.” Kevin’s voice was steady, but Ethan noticed his eyes narrowed on Charlene’s face. “I don’t know what to believe right now, but this is Ethan’s boat. We help. You don’t have to like it. Do you have a plan? What was the plan before you discovered Ethan and I were on the boat?” “Look, Charlie—” Kevin kept his voice low but Charlene interrupted him. 101

Heart of the Storm “Don’t call me Charlie, you son of a bitch. You went undercover and let Mom and Dad think you were dead. All this time you’ve been alive. Did you know—” Desperately, Ethan cut her off. “We don’t have time for this, honey. Hello! Bad guys with guns, remember?” He kept his voice gentle. She seemed ready to explode into flames. She clamped her lips together and looked absolutely mutinous. Kevin took a deep breath and glanced at Charlie. “Let’s just get out of this and then you can tear me to pieces, deal?” Charlene had tears on her face. Wiping one away gently, he said, “Baby, don’t. Keep it together a little while longer.” Silently nodding, she looked at Kevin. “Now what?” “Now we get rid of the men who came over with us and radio our position to the FSB.” Stepping around Kevin, Ethan pulled his shotgun from a hidden place underneath the radar equipment. Kevin handed Charlene a card. “This has the channel and passwords to contact the FSB. They didn’t know we were meeting this far north. I couldn’t get through to them sooner.” Charlene’s brow furrowed. “How long will it take for them to get here?” Kevin’s smile was grim. “Too long.” “Great,” Ethan muttered under his breath. Kevin snorted. “Yeah. Let’s go.” He turned to Charlene. “Radio our position to the Coast Guard as well. They can’t get to us, but they’ll know we’ve been hijacked.” Realizing he was walking into a possible firefight, Ethan stopped in front of Charlene. Her brown eyes looked frightened and she clutched his sleeve. Looking down at her face, he was struck by the fact he’d never gotten over her. He’d loved her when she was nineteen and he loved her now. If he survived, he wasn’t going to let her go ever again. 102

Heart of the Storm Sweeping her against him, he kissed her with all his pent-up emotions pouring out of him. The feeling of her trembling and grasping his shoulders as if she didn’t want him to leave was euphoric. After thoroughly kissing her, he let her go and turned abruptly toward the deck.

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Chapter 11 She watched the two men she loved most in the whole world walk away, shotguns in hand, to fight it out with some serious criminals. Closing her eyes, she sent up a silent prayer for their safety and grabbed the radio. As she contacted the Coast Guard, she heard gunfire and shouting. She then used the channel Kevin gave her to try and contact the FSB. When she finally got someone there who spoke English, she gave them the passwords and her position. Meanwhile, she strained her ears to distinguish the shouts outside. She heard frantic Russian from an unrecognizable voice. Then her brother’s voice calling out in a spate of Russian and answering gunfire. Fear made her hands tremble, but she kept sending information over the radio trying to keep her voice calm. Ethan’s voice called out for Pogie and Jamie. With relief, she heard Pogie’s gravelly voice shouting an answer, but not Jamie’s. After receiving an answer from both the Coast Guard and the FSB, she finally looked out on the deck. Jamie was locked in combat with Cal. Unable to look away, she watched them battle, with Cal trying to swipe Jamie with a knife and the greenhorn avoiding getting sliced by millimeters. When Jamie got a hold of Cal’s arm, they struggled relentlessly. Charlene saw Cal crumple and Jamie’s face turn white. He hated Cal, but she could tell he hadn’t wanted to kill him. 104

Heart of the Storm Then she saw the raft coming back from the Russian dragger. Getting on the radio and setting it to communicate with the deck, she shouted urgently. “Stabler is coming back. Get your asses in here now!” She’d done it without thinking, but realized her mistake when she turned and saw a huge man starting up the steps from the galley. With a curse, she grabbed the nearest thing on hand to hit him with and found Ethan’s coffee mug. She threw it at him and though it hit him in the face, he didn’t stop. As his shotgun came up and he aimed the weapon at her, something slammed into his back and he slumped on the stairs. As the man fell, she saw Ethan standing behind him, smoke floating from the barrel of his shotgun. He rushed to her and yanked her into his arms. He kissed her hard and she tasted his fear. When the kiss broke, he shook her by the shoulders. “Damn it! You could have been killed! Why did you give away your position?” He shook her until her teeth rattled. “You can yell at me later. Get us out of here.” Ethan started up the engines and revved them. Throwing the boat into gear, he gunned it recklessly and moved it forward as fast as he could. Charlene looked out on the ocean and saw the wake from The Celtic Rose slosh over the raft and fling it away. Stabler was being left behind and without his cargo. Grimly, Ethan picked up the radio and began to notify the Coast Guard of their situation. Kevin came up the stairs, stepping over the dead man still laying there. “They’re all dead,” he said quietly.

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Heart of the Storm Charlene looked at her brother. “Tell me what happened, Kevin. Why were you gone for eight years? What happened to Jason?” She thought her brother looked frightening. There was no remorse, no expression on his face. “I guess it doesn’t matter now.” Anger welled up in her throat. “It does to me.” Kevin’s shoulders sagged. “It’s a long story.” The pain in his voice and the look of defeat in his eyes made Charlene wince. The anger drained out of her and an emptiness in her stomach replaced it. Was she going to lose her brother again? Now that she’d found him, she had a choice to judge him or listen to him. Setting aside her own resentments and pain, she put a hand on his shoulder. “Why don’t we go in the galley and you can tell us about it?” Once seated in the galley, the crew, Kevin and Ethan drank some coffee. Jamie looked green. Jamie wasn’t handling killing a man well as far as Charlene could see. “Jamie, are you doing okay?” She kept her voice gentle and soft. His face went white and he started to shake. “It’s the adrenaline,” Kevin said. “His teeth are chattering.” Gabriel put a hand on Jamie’s shoulder. “He’ll be fine, won’t you, Jamie?” Jamie managed a nod and took a deep, shuddering breath. Pogie had a scratch down his cheek and Gabriel was limping slightly. They all knew they weren’t out of trouble yet. She studied the man who used to be her carefree brother. It was hard to believe that this bearded stranger was her brother. Only those blue eyes looked the same, but they were colder. “I don’t know how much you know. I’ll just start from the beginning.” He took a deep breath. “It was just another trip. We 106

Heart of the Storm hired on Ross Perry and Sean Cowell last minute. Jack Dory was still on the crew but Jason and I were looking for someone to replace him.” He sighed. “We were planning on getting a better crew, but the season was going to start, so we took what we could get. We were halfway through the trip when Ross and Sean pulled guns on us and forced me to go north.” The whole time he shared his story, he’d kept his eyes down on his coffee cup. When he raised them to meet Charlene’s, they held a sad look. “Ross shot Jason, right?” Charlene asked gently. “How did you know that?” Kevin’s voice was sharp and suspicious. Ethan spoke up. “Ken Stabler told us. He’s the guy running the show, Kevin.” Watching her brother, she saw the controlled rage. “Ken Stabler. I want to kill that bastard.” His fists clenched. Charlene encouraged Kevin to continue. “Tell us how you ended up helping the FSB.” “We went north because Ross said he’d finish Jason off if I didn’t. Then the storm hit. It was a bad one. Rogue waves, green water hitting the wheelhouse. It was hell.” He ran his fingers through his hair. “The engine flooded and we started taking water. I put her on Big Diomede Island. The radio was out from a wave that hit the wheelhouse. Ross had put a couple of bullets in Jason to get my cooperation. Now, we were stranded and Jason was dying, then Dory took off in the life raft. Ross and Sean were going to finish us off.” His abrupt stop had Charlene’s stomach churning. After a moment, he continued. “Then Ross shot Jason dead. Just like that.” He snapped his fingers. “I was mad. Really mad. I figured if I was going out, I was going down kicking. I rushed Ross and Sean shot me.” Charlene’s gasp of surprise made him look up from his coffee cup. “It was only in the shoulder, Charlie. It 107

Heart of the Storm hurt, but not bad enough to stop me. I took Ross Perry out and used his shotgun to shoot Sean.” His face was grim. “Stabler said the shipment was delivered,” Ethan said. Kevin nodded. “That’s right. A Russian dragger showed up and I managed to hide on shore. They found Ross and Sean, but they were only interested in the cargo. I was in and out of consciousness, so I don’t remember much after that. They didn’t find me.” “But you were totally stranded,” Ethan said flatly. Charlene’s jaw dropped. “Oh my God. That’s awful, Kevin!” “Yeah. No radio. No boat, and I was in Russian territory with a gunshot wound.” He smiled weakly. “It looked pretty bad.” He took a gulp of coffee. “The FSB found me. It took me two months to convince them I wasn’t an extremist Muslim terrorist or an American spy. When they finally released me, they had a proposal for me. They didn’t trust me to go home, but I was a valuable asset. I was American and everyone thought I was dead. I could stay in their wonderful prison system until the American Embassy could get me home or I could work for them and catch the guy who was running arms from Alaska to the Russian coast. I decided I’d rather get the guy who got Jason killed. Maybe it was selfish, but I needed to do it. The FSB taught me Russian and I went undercover after about two years of training.” “Did you know Dad died?” Whispering, Charlene barely got the words out. Kevin didn’t meet her eyes. “Yes. They told me when I started my training.” His eyes finally met hers. They were so sad, pleading. “I didn’t know it was going to take eight years, Charlie, I swear. After two years of training, it took me another five to infiltrate this Russian mafia’s network.” He paused again. 108

Heart of the Storm “I forgot everything except getting revenge. Now it was all for nothing. We know who’s doing it, but I can’t prove it.” Charlene noticed that Ethan was deep in thought. “What, Ethan? You’ve got an idea.” Looking up, Ethan met her eyes. “We need to go back and find that bastard. If we can get the Coast Guard on board with us or the FSB, we can make the transaction happen. I’m not sure who’s worse though, Ken Stabler or Ivanisovitch. They’re both dangerous men and they want that cargo. They’ll do anything to get it.” A look passed between Kevin and Ethan. Charlene caught it. “Oh, no you don’t. I’m not going to be fobbed off while you go into danger. That crap isn’t going to fly.” She stood and put her hands on her hips staring down at the two men. “They’ll notice she’s gone anyway and that will hurt our chances of making this happen,” Pogie put in. “Every hand we have is one more in our favor,” Gabriel said softly. “She can shoot, can’t she?” Jamie pointed out. Ethan threw up his hands. “How did you get my whole crew on your side?” Taking his face in her hands, she kissed him lightly. “I charmed them.” “You should try it, Captain,” Pogie joked. Charlene touched her brother’s face. “I’m so glad you’re alive and home, Kevin.” To her surprise, she saw tears in his eyes. “Oh, God, Charlie. I wasn’t there when Dad died. I couldn’t do anything to save Jason. If I get you killed too—” “Oh, that won’t happen.” She knew she sounded smug. “Really? And how are you going to prevent that?” Kevin smiled. “I’m not.” She grinned. “That’s Ethan’s job.” 109

Heart of the Storm Ethan threw up his hands in obvious frustration. Kevin looked up at her and Ethan and started roaring with laughter. The rest of the crew joined in. **** The water was still rough as The Celtic Rose cut a swath through the white-tipped waves toward Russian waters. Ethan was at the wheel leaning back in his chair, smoking leisurely when Charlene came up to see him. “Any news from the Coast Guard?” she asked. “Yes. They’re sending a cutter out but it won’t be here for another eight hours.” “How do we know that Russian boat will be there when we get back?” “Kevin radioed them and told them he subdued the crew and will bring the boat back. He says Ivanisovitch gave him new coordinates.” “And we’re going to do what?” Charlene leaned against the dash watching smoke drifting from Ethan’s cigarette. “We’re going to catch Stabler and Ivanisovitch and turn them over to the Coast Guard and FSB.” “So we’re not waiting? Why?” “Ivanisovitch isn’t going to wait. If we wait too long, they’ll get away and we’ll have no chance to catch them. We have to go in alone.” Staring at him, she drank in his tired face and calloused hands, trying to memorize his face. “Ethan—” She stopped. His green eyes sparkled. “You don’t have to say anything, Charlene. If I live through this, you can tell me then.” He turned back to the window, his eyes on the churning ocean. She turned her back to leave but she was full of indecision. She loved him. There was no doubt in her mind that they belonged together. What she didn’t know was whether they could make a life together. Everything changed when they found 110

Heart of the Storm her brother. For years, she’d hated fishing and the Bering Sea for killing her brother. She let her mother’s bitterness and her father’s death push her away from the only life she knew. Now, Kevin was alive and crab fishing had nothing to do with his disappearance. Did she feel the same way about it all now? Love for the sea had returned to her heart. Love for Ethan had never left her. Could they make a life together? That is, could they make a life together if Ethan lived through the upcoming danger? Confused and uncertain, she wasn’t sure what to say. She only knew how she felt. She turned around slowly and caught him watching her leave. His eyes were intense and serious as if he were trying to devour her with them. With no conscious volition of her own, she moved toward him and put her hands in his hair. As she leaned down to his face, she whispered to him, “I haven’t got the right words. Let me show you instead.” With just the lightest pressure, she laid her lips on his. His hands reached up and clasped around her waist, pulling her onto his lap. The sweetness of his kiss undid her. Tender, gentle and overpowering, Ethan’s kiss melted her heart and heated her body. She found herself lost in sensation as he delved into her mouth demanding a response from her. As quickly as the sweet kiss began, like a gentle spring rain, it changed into a heavy storm. He yanked his mouth away from hers and clicked on the autopilot, his hands shaking. For a moment, he stared at her as if to give her a chance to change her mind and leave. In answer to his silent question, she cupped his face and nuzzled his lips with her own and explored the fine texture of his mouth with her tongue. The pounding of his heart melded with her own and her hands were everywhere. Without breaking their kiss, Ethan 111

Heart of the Storm stood and she felt him yank on her jeans and lift up her sweatshirt. When his hand clamped over her breast, she moaned into his mouth. Urgently, he began pulling her clothes off and pushing her toward his berth. Both his hands covered her breasts as he broke the kiss only long enough to bite her neck. With her head tipped back and totally naked in his arms, she felt as if she were spinning. Then he stilled. His hands stopped stroking, and he lifted his head. She opened her eyes and saw the agony and desire etched in the grooves of his face. She reached up her hand and smoothed away the deep lines that contracted between his brows when he felt worried or anxious. She knew what he needed—what they both needed. The words were there, finally freed from her heart. She could say them now. Tears welled in her eyes and made her throat raw. “I love you, Ethan Shannon. I’ve loved you all my life. Eight years my life was empty without you. I never stopped loving you.” Tears ran down her face. Now, when it was almost too late, the words tore at her. The thought of living without him ever again was torture. With exquisitely tender hands, he cupped her face and kissed her tear-stained cheeks. “Charlene—” She put a finger over his mouth. “I want to hear you call me Charlie, Ethan. That’s who I’ve always been.” “Charlie, I love you.” The sound of his voice vibrated through her, sending heat licking through her veins. He moved then, pausing only long enough to shed his own clothes and toss them across the wheelhouse. She took the length of him in her hand and stroked him, feeling triumphant as she saw him groan and jerk slightly at her touch. 112

Heart of the Storm He was a whirlwind. Where he had been gentle, he was now insistent. Where he had been sweet, he was now dominating. Every inch of her body was branded by his touch. He whispered sinful, sexy things in her ear that sent her blood boiling. By the time he was poised at her entrance, she was begging him to take her. With one primitive thrust, he claimed her. He grabbed her hips and thrust into her over and over. She felt the rising tension inside her and as she reached its tremendous heights, she gripped his hips with her legs and hung on. Shuddering over and over, she felt Ethan rear back and thrust deeply one last time. His warmth flowing into her sent fresh shudders through her, making her orgasm go on and on. Nothing could be more than this. The feel of his hot breath in her hair, the warmth of his body on hers, the tenderness of his kiss were things she could never live without now. “Ethan—” The radio crackled. Gibberish that sounded like Russian poured from the speaker. With one last burning kiss, Ethan pulled away from her, collecting his clothes and silently handing Charlene hers. As they finished dressing, Ethan called down to the galley. “Kevin! We need you up here now.” In an instant, Kevin was on the radio responding to the Russian call. Charlene watched her brother in amazement. Who would have thought that her brother would learn Russian? The easy, happy-go-lucky man who laughed easily and took life as it came was gone. Once, she’d believed that Kevin didn’t take anything seriously. Even the captain’s chair was a lark, an adventure. Fishing was all about the adrenaline for Kevin and Jason back then. 113

Heart of the Storm Now, it was hard to believe this stranger on the radio had roared with laughter only an hour ago. Stark and determined, Kevin looked dangerous. Charlene wondered what he had been required to do in the last eight years and how would that affect him now? “Da. Da.” Kevin stopped speaking and looked at Ethan. “I think Ivanisovitch believes me. He really wants that cargo.” “Have you seen what that cargo is, Kevin?” Ethan asked. “I have. It’s not guns or grenades or anything normal.” Kevin went still. “What do you mean?” “I mean, they emptied out one of the fish holds and filled it with cylinders of some kind of gas. Do we really want to risk handing that over?” “What are you saying?” “I’m saying that this may be too much for us to handle. We could get everyone killed and not keep that stuff out of the hands of the Russian mafia.” The bleak look on Kevin’s face broke Charlene’s heart. “You don’t know that, Ethan,” she said firmly. Ethan pointed below. “That’s not play toys down there. Those are no Muslim revolutionaries buying this stuff. This is major. I don’t know too much about Russian politics but I’m pretty sure all of those little spinoffs don’t have the clout for this kind of deal.” Charlene could see Kevin’s brain working. “What, Kevin?” “My superiors at FSB told me that if I was unable to secure the cargo and Stabler, I was to abort the whole thing. They emphasized that again when I talked to them earlier tonight. Usually, they tell me to destroy the cargo. Not tonight. They must know what’s in there.” Ethan nodded. “It would be too destructive and draw too much attention if poison gas was released into the ocean. This 114

Heart of the Storm stuff is probably pretty bad. The question is, what do we do? There’s no way we can let Ivanisovitch get his hands on it.” “If I don’t meet him, he and Stabler will slip away. In fact, they could go back to business as usual. There’s only the cargo and you can bet Stabler will deny knowledge.” Ethan looked very grim. “I think Stabler was going to make it look like I was the criminal. If there’s any evidence, it points to me.” “So we have no choice,” Charlene said. “No. We have to go back and try and take them down.” “Have you radioed the FSB and the Coast Guard yet with the new coordinates?” Charlene asked Kevin. “All taken care of,” Kevin said. “How far to the new coordinates? Ethan asked. “About an hour.” Kevin sat in the captain’s chair and leaned back looking at Ethan and Charlene. “Now, would somebody please tell me why my little sister is banging one of my best friends?” “Watch it, bud. I’m not banging Charlene. I love her,” Ethan said. Kevin turned an interested glance to his sister. “Well?” “I love him too.” “It took you eight years to figure it out?” “I guess so. We can’t all be smart like you, Kevin,” she quipped. Kevin grinned. When he smiled like that, he looked like her brother, not a stranger. “You sure can’t, Charlie.” The smile dropped from his face. “Tell me how Dad died, Charlie. Did he go quick?” “Yes. He didn’t feel any pain. You know he lived hard and worked harder. His heart just gave out.” “You don’t have to protect me, Charlie. I know it happened right after I was reported dead.” 115

Heart of the Storm Charlene struggled to find the right words. She hated to blame anyone but it wasn’t her brother’s fault at all. “Kevin, after you were declared ‘dead’, Mom never let up. She blamed Dad. She even tried to blame Ethan. She was so angry and bitter and it wasn’t all about your death. Even though Dad wasn’t fishing anymore, he wouldn’t move from Anacortes. Mom just wouldn’t let up. I think Dad finally couldn’t take it anymore. He was down on the docks, telling stories when his heart gave out.” She smiled sadly. “Mom moved to Seattle two weeks later.” Kevin shook his head. “What did you do?” Charlene took a deep breath. “I ran away. I’d been gone for almost a month when Dad died.” Kevin’s brow puckered. “Why did you run?” “Because I was a fool. I fell in love with Ethan, but I was afraid of losing him. I begged him to quit and when he wouldn’t, I left.” Ethan took her hand and stroked it with his thumb. “I wasn’t here when Dad died. Part of me believes Mom wouldn’t have been so awful if I had been home. She felt that fishing killed one child and drove away the other. Dad was just a handy target.” “Why did you come back?” “Dory showed up alive in an Arizona prison. He shot a store clerk and I managed to get some information from him,” Charlene said. “Up until then, I thought you were lost at sea.” “The little weasel. Jason might still be alive but for him.” Kevin spit the words out. “I think he may not live in prison long. If Ethan is right and Stabler isn’t the guy in charge, he’s a dead man.” Kevin sighed. “I’ve lived for my revenge so long I don’t know what else I’m going to do.” Ethan put a hand on Kevin’s shoulder. “You won’t be doing it alone, whatever it is.” 116

Heart of the Storm As they neared the location of the Russian boat, the crew disappeared into the galley. Kevin introduced them to the other FSB agent. “This is Vladamir Svenost. Just call him Vlad.” The tall, dark Russian just inclined his head. “Does he speak English?” Charlene asked. “I speak English,” Vlad answered. His coarse, black hair was rather long and he wore a similar beard to the one Kevin sported. “How in the world did you get involved in this, or should I ask?” Charlene looked at Vlad curiously. The Russian’s smile was charming. “I speak English. I get stuck with him.” He jerked a thumb at Kevin. Even though he rolled his eyes, Charlene could see Kevin and Vlad liked each other. “He babysat me when I started at the FSB.” Kevin grinned and for a brief moment her brother looked younger. “I guess he liked it.” Vlad shrugged. “You paid me back in Turkestan.” “And you saved my ass in Thailand.” Their grins were mirror images. “I did my job,” Vlad said. Kevin shook his head. “You’ve always done more than that, my friend. Back to business though.” His eyes became serious again. “The plan is this. Ivanisovitch thinks I’ve killed all of you except Charlene, so you’ll have to stay hidden.” Kevin looked apologetically at Charlene. “I convinced him that a hostage would be advantageous.” Charlene just nodded. “When Stabler comes aboard to take the cargo, Vlad and I will meet him. We’ll take care of Stabler and the FSB will have to take care of Ivanisovitch.” Kevin looked at Vlad, who nodded. “What about catching them in the act? Ethan will get blamed for having the cargo unless it’s offloaded to the Russian vessel,” Charlene insisted. 117

Heart of the Storm “We can’t afford to let Ivanisovitch get his hands on that cargo, Charlie. He’d use it against the FSB agents,” Kevin explained. Ethan put his hand on Charlene. “Honey, with witnesses on both sides, it will be okay.” “I don’t think so. Does the Coast Guard know that Ethan was being set up? How can we prove anything?” “We’ve got the crew who heard Cal accusing Stabler. That should be enough to keep me out of trouble.” “It better be,” she muttered. “So, the rest of you need to stay out of sight unless Vlad and I signal that we need help,” Kevin went on. “Do we have a signal?” Jamie asked. Kevin smiled. “If there’s gunfire, you’ll know that Stabler is on to us.” “I don’t like that signal.” Charlene put her hands on her hips. “It’s the only way we can get Stabler. Unless we can get him back on American waters, we won’t be able to see him fry,” Kevin pointed out. “What if he brings men on board like he did before? That’s how you got on the boat,” Pogie asked. Kevin’s face was hard and determined. “Then Vlad and I will have to take them out as well.” Ethan stood up. “I’ll keep the boat on course. What’s the signal for me to start the boat to leave?” “When I have Stabler in the galley and contained, I’ll holler up to you.” “Okay. I’ll keep a look out from the wheelhouse.” Morning was breaking over the ocean. Ethan kept his eyes peeled with his binoculars looking for the Russian dragger. Charlene kept the boat on course. Vlad and Kevin waited in the galley with the rest of the crew. 118

Heart of the Storm “There they are,” Ethan said quietly. Charlene cut the engines. “We have to get out of the wheelhouse, Ethan. They may have binoculars too.” “Right. Let’s go.” They headed down to the galley. “She’s drifting, Kevin. Just as if you were unable to pilot the boat,” Ethan said. “Okay. Now we wait for them to send over a boat.” Kevin stood by the galley sink with his binoculars trained on the Russian vessel. Vlad absently rubbed his boot. Jamie chewed on the side of one of his fingernails. Pogie and Gabriel both smoked calmly. Ethan came over and put his hands on Charlene’s shoulders. “I want you to go in the stateroom until this is over.” “No.” She wasn’t going to be hiding in a bedroom while her brother and the man she loved might be killed. “Please, honey. I love you and I don’t want you to be hurt.” “And I don’t want you to be shot. It isn’t stopping you, is it?” “That’s different,” he insisted. “Here they come.” Their argument was interrupted by Kevin’s comment. Vlad and Kevin headed for the galley door. Charlene stepped in front of her brother. “I just found you, knothead, don’t get yourself killed.” For a moment, he looked like his old self smiling at her. “Don’t worry, Bitty, I won’t.” Charlene felt tears sting her eyes when he called her by the nickname he’d used as a child. As she turned away, Ethan folded her in his arms. She heard the galley door close as her brother went out to face a murderer. Maybe several. 119

Heart of the Storm Ethan caught the look Kevin sent after his little sister. It was a depth of emotion he understood. If his little sister had been in this mess, he would have felt the same way. Something must have shown on his face, because Kevin looked him in the eye and there was a silent plea there. Ethan knew Kevin was begging him to take care of Charlene. He nodded and Kevin left the galley. Now they had to wait. All they could hear was a spate of Russian. It appeared that Stabler had indeed brought more men over. Stabler’s voice carried into the galley. “Are you sure they’re all dead? I want that Ethan Shannon dead as a doornail.” More voices which were unclear. In an instant, Ethan heard the change. A Russian curse and Stabler’s shout told Ethan that Vlad and Kevin were taking out the Russian contingency. The sound of two shots startled everyone in the galley. Ethan was to the door first. Shotgun in hand, he lifted it, clicked off the safety and looked for a target. There were five men dead on the deck. Four were from the Russian boat, and Vlad. The Russian FSB agent was shot in the back. Kevin had Stabler by his neck and Ethan saw him squeezing it. Although Ethan thought blue was Stabler’s color, he put a hand on Kevin’s shoulder. “Don’t do it, man. Let justice happen. Let him go.” Slow and careful, Kevin released his death grip on Stabler’s neck. When Stabler collapsed on the deck, Ethan lifted a booted foot and kicked him even though he was unconscious. “I know it isn’t the ‘sporting’ thing to do, but that man is a bastard.” Bullets began to ping on the steel wall beside him. Kevin shouted, “Get down. They’re firing from the other boat.” The Russian boat was heading straight for The Celtic Rose at full speed. As Ethan turned to fire on the oncoming vessel and 120

Heart of the Storm the men shooting from its deck, he felt a burning in his right shoulder as a bullet ripped through him. He looked down and saw blood streaming through the fingers he instinctively put up to his chest. Dizzy, he knew he had to keep firing back or die. **** Hearing the gunfire, Charlene hefted the .308 shotgun Ethan had handed her earlier. Out on deck, all she could see was Ethan on the deck bleeding and her brother crouched behind the small steel enclosure just outside the galley. Fear tore at her heart. Ethan was going to die if she didn’t do something. He was staggering, but still peppering the crouching figures on the deck of the other vessel. Breathe, Charlene. Breathe. She closed her eyes briefly and felt, more than heard, the rest of the crew fanning out behind her. Flattening herself on the deck, trying to get the feel for the pitch and roll of the boat as she aimed carefully at the oncoming vessel, she got off one shot and sent one of the Russian deckhands scurrying for cover. “Move the damn boat, Charlie! Get us out of here!” Ethan’s voice was hoarse. Ignoring him, Charlene ran out on deck, where Ethan now knelt with blood pouring from his shoulder. Two bullets whizzed by her and one sprayed splinters from the deck right in front of her. She grabbed Ethan’s arm. “Run!” They ran for the galley. A bullet pinged against the metal column just to her right as they plunged through the galley door. Quickly, she pressed a cloth towel over his wound and tried not to throw up as she watched it soak with blood. Ethan passed out. Charlene sprinted for the wheelhouse and started the engines. They spit and sputtered and to her right she could see 121

Heart of the Storm the Russian vessel bearing down on them apparently on course to ram them. Kicking the engine into gear, she gunned it and prayed she didn’t kill it. The boat lurched forward and the wake from The Celtic Rose slammed into the oncoming vessel. Another bullet shattered the right side window in the wheelhouse and shards of glass spewed all over her. Water from a wave followed the glass and knocked Charlene off her feet twice. The cold water stung her eyes and numbed her fingers, but she managed to get on the radio. “Mayday! Mayday! Coast Guard cutter, come in. This is The Celtic Rose. Come in.” Another wave rose up and slammed into the wheelhouse. This time it knocked the radar screen above her off the wall which seemed to fall in slow motion. Charlene didn’t have time to move. It careened into her head and shoulders and the last thing she remembered was seeing the radio smashed to pieces.

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Chapter 12 “Charlie! Charlie! Wake up.” Kevin was shaking her when all she wanted to do was sleep. Opening her eyes and squinting up at her brother, waves of pain washed through her head. What happened? Confused for a moment, she shook her head to clear it. Ouch! That was a mistake. Oh, right. She’d been conked on the head by a television screen. Man, it hurt. She heard herself groan. As she sat up, she felt blood trickling down her neck. Her brother’s violet blue eyes looked terrified. “I’m okay, Kevin. This isn’t any worse than the time you hit me over the head with a baseball bat,” she mumbled. “That was an accident and you know it.” He looked relieved. “Have you checked Ethan? What happened? Did the Russian boat ram us?” “Whoa, Speed Racer. Take it easy. The boat grazed us. We’ve got a couple of badly placed holes, but we’re taking care of it.” Charlene instantly noticed he hadn’t mentioned Ethan. “Where’s Ethan?” Kevin was silent for a moment. “He’s not good, Charlene.” Her stomach plunged. “What do you mean?” “Normally, a shoulder shot would be no big deal, but I think it may have punctured his lung.” 123

Heart of the Storm Dizziness flowed over her and Kevin’s voice sounded far away. Somehow, she pushed herself up off the floor and with a little help was back on her feet. “Take me to him, Kevin. Is he still in the galley?” “We didn’t want to move him.” The stairs to the galley were the longest stretch of walking she’d ever done. It seemed to take years and she had to be careful because she was dizzy. She stumbled and reached a hand out to steady herself. Finally, she made it to the galley. The crew had made a makeshift bed out of the table benches and Ethan lay so still upon it. Charlene fell to her knees beside his head and gently moved strands of hair that curled over his forehead. “You can’t die on me now, Ethan Shannon. Not when we’ve got crab to catch and kids to raise. Not when I finally know I love you no matter what. You couldn’t do anything but crab fishing and I love you that way. You have to hang on.” Ethan’s white face didn’t change. Looking up at her brother, she realized her cheeks were wet with tears. “Kevin, what will I do without him? We have to get him ashore. Where’s the Coast Guard?” “We’re not waiting for the Coast Guard. We’re going to St. Paul.” “But that’s hours away and we don’t have a radio!” The panic in her voice came right from her heart. He can’t die. Her eyes closed. I can’t live without him. Opening her eyes, she pleaded with Kevin without words. She couldn’t speak. “He’ll die if we wait, Charlie. I’ve done all I can.” Charlene saw the pain twisting on Kevin’s face. Looking at Ethan’s pale face and then to Kevin’s determined eyes, she tried to find calm inside herself. Taking a deep breath, she met Kevin’s eyes. “I know, Kevin. I trust you.” 124

Heart of the Storm He relaxed slightly. “I need to drive the boat, Charlie. You’ve got to watch Ethan. If he runs a fever, you’ve got to cool him down. We’ve got about three hours to go. It may get bad.” Wiping tears from her eyes, she straightened her back. “I can do it.” The rest of the crew got some sleep and Charlene’s vigil to keep Ethan alive began. After three hours, the fever Kevin predicted became evident. Charlene bathed him in cold cloths, trying to keep his temperature from soaring. That was enough to twist her guts. But as the fever raged, he began to talk incoherently. “Charlie! Charlie!” he called out. “I’m here, Ethan.” She took his hand. “You’re there? Don’t leave me. Please.” His hand clutched her sleeve. “I’m not going anywhere.” Ethan’s eyes were glassy and unseeing. His voice croaked out, “Your mother was right.” “My mother? Ethan, what are you talking about?” He must be confused. “She said you were better off without me. Maybe she was right, Charlie. Charlie?” His voice was fading. Her mother had known Charlene wanted to go back to Ethan only days after she left him. What kind of mother would have destroyed her daughter’s happiness like that? Life without Ethan had been existence, not living. Had Charlene seen Ethan then, she would have gone back happily. In fact, she’d been ready to go back. Looking at Ethan’s flushed face and the ugly wound in his shoulder it was hard not to blame her bitter mother for wasted years. “Ethan, I’m here now. I’m never going to leave.” 125

Heart of the Storm “Your mother was right, Charlie. I’d only make you unhappy. You want to live in the city.” “No, my mother was wrong, Ethan. I’d live anywhere if it was with you. I’m not my mother.” As she said it, she realized it was true. The bitterness and anger destroying her mother was not inside Charlene. “I love you, Charlie. I only want you happy.” “I know, Ethan. If you want me happy, then you damn well better live!” **** They reached St. Paul. With no radio, they had to call with the boat cell phone as soon as they were in range. There was an ambulance waiting at the dock. Charlene was having her temple looked at as Ethan was whisked away for possible emergency surgery by helicopter. Kevin stayed with Charlene while Pogie went with Ethan. “I need to get to wherever they’re taking him, Kevin.” The EMT stitching up the gash on her head spoke up. “You really shouldn’t be doing anything but resting. I don’t think you have a concussion, but it’s hard to say.” Gritting her teeth, she glared at her brother, who was grinning. “Don’t worry, Bitty, I’ll get you there nice and easy.” As it turned out, Charlene had a sprained arm and they wanted her to go to the hospital as well, just to be safe. Kevin stayed behind to deal with the questions about gunshot wounds, dangerous poison gas and a bad guy with finger marks around his neck. The Juneau emergency room discharged her about four hours later and she immediately went in search of Ethan. Sporting six stitches on her forehead and still dizzy, all she wanted was to make sure Ethan lived. Then she’d never leave him again, no matter what. 126

Heart of the Storm As Charlene approached the ICU double doors, she could see two figures through the glass. One was a small blonde she recognized as Ethan’s sister Kelly. The other figure was her mother. With new insight, she inspected her mother. Perfectly coiffed hair, long nails, graceful movements, Charlene wondered how this woman could have birthed her. They were nothing alike. Mona Henderson had red hair, long and straight and Charlene’s was brown and naturally curly. Mona was tall and slim. Charlene was not, although she liked her curves better than her mother’s straight lines. It was her eyes Charlene really focused on. Bitter and tired, there was no joy in them. She looked like a very unhappy woman. She pushed through the doors and her mother turned to look at her. As her mother reached her arms out for the obligatory air kiss, Charlene knew why she’d come here. Somehow her mother found out that Ethan was back in the picture. Bracing herself, she knew what she was going to hear. “I heard you came in on the boat and you were injured.” There was resentment in her mother’s voice. “I didn’t even know you were out on a crab boat until Dutch called me.” It was clear that Charlene was in for a lecture. Still, she did have good news for her mother. “Mom, Kevin is alive! He’s back in St. Paul, but he’s alive.” Mona was still and her face lost all its color. There was no joy or happiness in her eyes. “Is he?” Charlene could only stare. Didn’t her mother care that Kevin was alive? Mona stepped back and put distance between them. “I looked for you in the emergency room, but they told me you 127

Heart of the Storm were discharged. I thought this is where you might be.” The tone seemed sarcastic and dry. “I owe Ethan my life.” “Really? Isn’t that a bit dramatic, dear?” “And I love him, Mother.” Trying to be gentle, she was a firm as she could be without being mean or nasty. “Really? Now I know you’re overreacting. You just think you love him because you’ve spent a few weeks on a boat with him. Just like last time, distance will prove me right.” “Not this time.” Never again. “You’ve got a lot in Los Angeles. I’m sure you won’t be foolish and throw it away. Your career has been good to you right from the beginning.” “About that, Mother. Did you talk to Ethan after I left?” “That was eight years ago, Charlene. How would I remember that?” Mona’s tone was sharp. “You’d remember this. I told you then that I loved him, remember? I said I made a mistake. You convinced me that if he loved me truly, he would have come after me. Now do you remember?” Charlene was trying not to be angry with her mother, but she knew some of it was coming out. “Yes, he came to see you. I sent him on his way. You’ve made a good life. You should be thanking me. Without that interference, you wouldn’t have a career. You’d be a fisherman’s wife, nothing.” Vicious and angry, Mona apparently didn’t notice that Ethan’s sister was now standing behind her. As she continued, Charlene tried to stop her, but Mona was too far gone. “All you would have is feast or famine and a husband who won’t be faithful. “Ethan Shannon.” Mona sneered his name. “What did he ever do but take away your innocence? So, now he’s a big captain and you love him. You’ll never make a fisherman’s wife. Everyone knows that Ethan is breaking the law with his boat. 128

Heart of the Storm Probably smuggling drugs. It’s all over the docks that he is. You go right ahead, Charlene, get involved with a drug runner.” Kelly, Ethan’s sister, wasn’t going to let that pass. Her voice made Mona start. “Mrs. Henderson, you’re wrong. Ethan is a good man and works hard. He took care of me after Mom and Dad died. And he doesn’t smuggle drugs. The only reason he got that reputation is because of you. You spread the word and I know it.” Kelly’s blonde hair was slightly askew and her blue eyes flashed fire, but she looked beautiful defending her brother. “Besides, Mother, we’ve proven Ethan isn’t a smuggler and we brought the real dealer into the authorities. Why can’t you just accept that I love him? If he asks me to marry him, I will. If he doesn’t want to get married, I’ll live with him. He’s all I want.” Kelly looked startled, but came over to Charlene and hugged her. “Oh, I’m so glad, Charlie. He missed you.” Mona Henderson didn’t look like herself. Red blotches stained her cheeks and one of her eyelids twitched. “I didn’t raise you to be a fisherman’s wife and raise a bunch of brats. Your father would have kept me pregnant for years if I hadn’t put a stop to that nonsense. You’re my only daughter and you should respect my wishes.” Somewhere inside herself, Charlene found compassion for her mother. Whatever drove her, it was more important to her than her daughter’s ultimate happiness. She shook her head. “No, Mother.” “You’d choose a drug smuggler over your own mother?” Anger made her voice sharp. Charlene winced, trying not to feel like a small girl again. “Ethan is not a drug smuggler. Ken Stabler, a federal observer, is the smuggler. He hijacked Kevin’s boat eight years ago and he did the same with Ethan’s last night. He’s with the 129

Heart of the Storm authorities telling everything he knows right now.” She raised her chin. “If there is any more talk about Ethan being rotten, I’ll know who to blame, Mother. That talk has gone on too long.” The stunned look on Mona’s face caused Charlene to start forward involuntarily. When her mother pulled back and whirled to leave, Charlene stared after her. “Alright, you better catch me up.” Kelly broke into Charlene’s thoughts. After telling Kelly about Jack Dory, the hijacking and the gun running, Kelly looked pensive. “Oh, Kelly, I’m so sorry Jason is dead.” She remembered Kelly had a massive crush on Jason. It might have been more, but Kelly had been too young. Then Jason disappeared when Kelly was only seventeen. They never had a chance. Wrapping Kelly in her arms, she tried to comfort her. “Somehow I always knew, Charlie. I knew he was dead.” Maybe it didn’t matter if one got married or even said I love you. The feeling of loss when they’re gone is the same. It had been too late eight years ago for Charlene. She fell in love with Ethan and if he died, the hole that was finally beginning to heal would break wide open again. In silent prayer, she closed her eyes. Live, you stubborn bastard. Live.

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Chapter 13 Hours passed before Kelly and Charlene had news of Ethan’s condition. Kevin finally joined them, exhausted but unharmed. The rest of the crew was there too, waiting for Ethan. Kevin filled them in on the rest. “Apparently, the FSB has been in contact with the federal authorities on the U.S. end and they’ve decided I did okay.” “What about Ivanisovitch?” Jamie asked. Kevin shook his head. “He got away. The boat was beached about forty miles from where we left him.” “Mom was here earlier, Kevin.” Charlene hated telling him. Her brother’s pained expression said it all. “I’m sure she left before I arrived.” Charlene could feel her heart breaking. “Why, Kevin?” The careless shrug from Kevin didn’t convince Charlene. “I don’t think she wants to see me alive, Charlie.” “You can’t believe that,” she said violently. He studied her carefully, as if deciding whether she could handle what he said next. “You were too young to know, but Mom was really unhappy. We never met her parents, you know.” Startled, Charlene said, “They’re alive? Mom always said they were dead.” “They are now, but they weren’t when we were young. Dad told me when he figured I was old enough to know.” Kevin 131

Heart of the Storm took a deep breath. “They were really pissed when Mom went off and married Dad. I guess they were rich and cut Mom off entirely.” Absorbed in thought, she asked, “Was Mom their only daughter? She always said she was.” “No. She had a brother.” He stopped. “So I have an uncle?” She waited for him to go on. “Charlie—” It seemed as if the words just wouldn’t come to Kevin. “Just say it, Kevin.” What could be so awful? “His name was Kenneth Dillard. He changed his last name. To Stabler.” There was a moment of silence. “I’m not sure what you’re saying, Kevin.” Her brother sighed. “I’m saying that Mom is in on it. Stabler confirmed it. I couldn’t believe it, but it’s the only thing that makes sense.” Charlene was confused. Her mother and an uncle she knew nothing about were gun runners? How do I deal with that? Is there a Hallmark card for criminal relatives? Happy Mother’s Day to the woman who raised me and then tried to kill me. She shook her head. I’m going crazy. Kelly’s arm around her was comforting. “Why do you think I wanted to stay dead?” Kevin told Charlene. “She sicced her brother on me. I found out about Mom from Sean. He wanted me to know that it was my own mother who signed my death warrant.” The bitter smile on Kevin’s face almost broke Charlene’s heart. “Why?” Charlene was completely bewildered. “That I don’t know for sure. I know Stabler just follows her orders. At least, that’s what he says.” “Why didn’t you tell me? You knew when you came aboard The Celtic Rose and saw me. Why didn’t you warn me?” 132

Heart of the Storm “I didn’t want you to know that Stabler was our uncle. I was planning on killing whoever was in charge. When I saw it was him, I didn’t know how to tell you. I wasn’t sure about Mom.” “I see.” “There’s more, Bitty. Mom isn’t working alone. There’s someone higher up, just as Ethan guessed. Stabler confirmed that tonight.” “Someone?” Kevin shook his head. “He won’t give a name.” “What else did Stabler admit?” Charlene asked. “He and Mom have been doing this for years. When I got too curious about where Mom’s money was coming from, Stabler said Mom told him to scuttle the boat. Make the delivery and if any evidence of the boat was found, I’d be labeled the smuggler.” She shook her head. “And then I started asking questions, so they planned the same fate for The Celtic Rose.” “That’s it. Mom’s really twisted, Charlie.” Kevin’s voice was filled with unspoken pain. “What do we do, Kevin? Are they going to arrest Mom?” “Ken is telling the Homeland Security Agents everything. Mom is in big trouble.” “Oh, Kevin—” Her voice broke as tears choked her. Her brother gave her a warm hug. “I don’t know how I feel.” “I know, Bitty. Neither do I.” They stood in the ICU waiting room, holding each other. **** Ethan slowly opened his eyes. Damn! His throat hurt. His vision was fuzzy and trying to figure out what was in front of his eyes made him dizzy. “Mr. Shannon—Ethan—can you hear me?” A disembodied voice echoed in his head. “Yesssss.” His mouth was dry and his tongue was thick. 133

Heart of the Storm “We’ve removed the tracheal tube that was helping you breathe. Don’t try and talk too much. Your throat is probably very sore. Are you thirsty?” He tried to nod vigorously, but it really hurt. Someone held water to his lips. That smell. Even over the hospital odors, he knew that smell. His hand reached up and grabbed. “Charlie.” “Well, hey there.” It was Charlie. Thank God. “Whoa, honey. Take it easy. They had you in there quite a while repairing leaks. You’re in dry dock for a while.” “Don’t leave,” he croaked out, frustrated he couldn’t say anything. “I’m not going anywhere, Ethan Shannon. Ever.” Ethan Shannon smiled as he slipped away into sleep. “Ethan? Ethan!” “He’s just asleep. Don’t worry. His breathing is good and he’s strong.” The nurse took his vitals every five minutes. “I’m going to stay here. Is that all right?” Charlene moved a hair from his forehead. “No problem.” **** “I want my clothes.” Surly and frustrated, Ethan was being a nightmare of a patient. Charlene sighed. “I like you better without them. Stop trying to sit up, Ethan. You’ll hurt yourself.” She straightened his hospital blanket. “I want out of here.” “I know, honey. Just hang in there.” Only four days and he was able to sit up and move around. Considering a bullet nicked one of his veins and they almost lost him twice on the table, he was doing well. Two days on a ventilator and two days off it and he was ready to go out the door. Crazy fisherman. 134

Heart of the Storm He thrust his hand through his hair. “I know I’m being a pain in the ass.” “Yes, you are. I love you anyway.” She sat on the edge of the bed and he yanked her down, pressing his lips to hers. It had been too long since he’d kissed her. She melted against him. Coming to her senses, she pushed away from him. “Damn it, Ethan! You need to get your strength back.” He grinned. “One part of me is completely recovered.” “Stop it or I’m getting the night nurse to come in early.” His hands came up in defense. “Okay, okay. I give up. Obviously, you don’t want to kiss me.” “Oh, stop it! You know that’s not true.” The twinkle in his eyes got brighter. “Prove it.” What the hell? Leaning down, she cupped his face in her hands and pressed her lips gently to his. And found herself flat on her back in the hospital bed as he kissed her unmercifully. Her hands crept into his hair and his pulled her closer. When he lifted his head, she smiled at him. “Does that convince you?” “Almost. This isn’t the most comfortable bed, but I don’t want to wait.” His eyes searched hers as if asking her permission. With his body resting along hers, she didn’t want to say no. “I don’t either.” She reached up and kissed his cheeks, his nose and he groaned. “Honey, this bed isn’t going to give us much room to maneuver,” he choked out. He rotated his body so that she lay along his body and he was on his back. She only smiled and slid down his body to his erect steel. His breath caught as her mouth hovered over his penis. With slow movements, she scraped her teeth over the smooth surface. She was rewarded with a heartfelt groan from Ethan. His fingers 135

Heart of the Storm wrapped in her hair and he tried to hold her head still, but she slid her tongue along his length. “Damn it, Charlie, you’re killing me.” His hand clenched in her hair and her scalp tingled. She sucked on him hard until he pressed her head so the tip of his cock slammed against the back of her throat and she began to stroke him up and down. Both his hands grasped her hair and yanked her mouth off him. His muscles flexed as he hauled her along his body. “Be careful,” she protested and braced her weight with her hands on either side of him. “You’re teasing me.” His teeth scraped her throat. His hand crept up her shirt and with a flick, he removed her bra. His clever fingers found the tips of her breasts already hard and waiting for his touch. He continued to nip her neck and her shoulder until her breath came in short gasps. His eyes met hers. “Take off your clothes, honey.” His voice was sultry and dark. “I don’t have the strength to do it.” Mischievously, she stood by the bed and removed her shirt and bra with deliberate ease. The dark glitter in Ethan’s green eyes encouraged her to undo the zipper of her pants and turn her back to him so he’d have a view of them sliding over her ass. Glancing back over her shoulder, she smiled when she saw his jaw tighten and his eyes riveted to her body. She stepped out of her pants and slipped under the covers. In a heartbeat, she was pinned beneath him and he held her hands over her head with one of his. The fingers of his other hand traced a line down her body and stroked her breasts until she squirmed and arched into his body. His eyes bored into hers as his fingers found her soft folds and parted them to stroke the erect flesh that ached for him. Her blood boiled and burned as he flicked that sensitive spot until she was damp with need. When his finger slipped inside her and stroked her slick channel, she cried out. 136

Heart of the Storm “Shh. You don’t want the nurses to hear you, do you?” His smile teased her. She clamped her lips shut and tried to hold her cries of pleasure inside. She reached down and grasped his cock in her hand, stroking and teasing him as she met his gaze. His eyes closed briefly and he replaced his one finger with two and rubbed her clit with his thumb. With no warning, she slipped over the edge and convulsed around his fingers. He removed his fingers and brought them to his mouth to lick them with an erotic slide of his tongue. She groaned at the expression of intense pleasure on his face. When he removed his clasp around her wrists, she clung to him and wrapped her legs around his hips. His face darkened and his hands stroked her body from breast to hip. He grasped her hips and lifted them as his hard length slid into her welcoming heat. They groaned in unison as he thrust deeper inside her. He reared back and slammed into her, but that seemed all he could do. Charlene began to thrust her hips up, creating friction and sparks the quicker she did it. She braced herself with her feet on either side of his body and clasped him deeper and harder inside her. The pressure built and she reached for the edge that would send her flying. She was so sensitive to him that she knew he was close to finding his release. The pulsating vein along his length expanded and she rotated her hips to thrust faster. Her climax rushed over her like a strong wind and she arched and clenched her muscles as her orgasm flooded her system. His release was a split second later and extended her convulsions until she quaked beneath him. His forehead dropped to hers. “That may have killed me, but it was worth it.” Concern broke through Charlene’s haze. “Are you okay?” Her hands flew to his dressings and injuries. 137

Heart of the Storm He grinned. “That was the best therapy I’ve had in here yet. But I’m completely spent.” “In more ways than one,” she muttered and slid out from underneath him. She fluffed his pillows and adjusted the covers. His face was flushed, but his eyes glittered and he smiled. “If you don’t want me to hurt myself, you might want to get some clothes on.” “Damn! I forgot.” She picked up her clothes with frantic, clumsy movements. She ignored his laughter. “I like you naked.” With a hand on her hip, she tried to straighten her hair. “Of course you do.” “Leave it alone. I like the way you look after I’ve made love to you.” “I’d prefer if everyone in the hospital didn’t know what we were doing in here.” His grin was maddening, but endearing all at the same time. “I’d like everyone to know.” What could she do? She laughed and didn’t resist when he grabbed her hand and yanked her down by his side. With her head on his shoulder, she sent up a silent prayer of thanks that he’d survived and he was hers.

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Chapter 14 The next day, Kevin came to visit Ethan. The close brush with death had Ethan thinking about his future with Charlene. They could have lost each other so easily. He wasn’t risking that anymore. “You have to take the boat out for me, Kevin.” Ethan was firm. “It’s been eight long years, Ethan. I can’t just step into the captain’s chair.” “That crew is losing money. The season will be over in a month. Take them out and run them ragged. They love it really.” Kevin laughed. “Tell you what I’ll do, Ethan. I’ll talk to the crew. If they’re willing to work with me, I’ll take her out.” As he left, Ethan thought about his plan. He wanted to retire from fishing. It was the only thing that would make Charlie truly happy. He couldn’t wait to tell her. When Kevin left and Charlene came in the room with fresh flowers and forbidden chocolate, he announced his intentions. Her reaction was not what he expected. “What! Are you out of your mind? Tell me you’re kidding.” Her face turned red and her eyes glittered. She’s beautiful, but really pissed off. “I think it would be best. Kevin can captain the boat, and I can retire…” 139

Heart of the Storm “And do what? Sell shoes? What the hell are you thinking? Fishing is what you do. You can’t leave it.” “Damn it, Charlie! I thought you wanted me to quit fishing.” “Once I thought that was what I wanted. Now, I want you to be happy.” “I’m not happy without you.” His gut was churning just thinking of being away from her. She took his hand in hers. “Well, good. You’re stuck with me.” “Charlie, would you…cook on the boat? Would you be my partner? I know you hate fishing—” She put her finger on his lips. “I don’t hate fishing, Ethan. I love the ocean. I love you. I love it all. I was young and foolish.” She rubbed his knuckles. “Did I tell you about my second week in L.A.?” Ethan squirmed in the hospital bed. “It doesn’t matter, Charlie.” Charlie stared at their clasped hands. “I told Mom that I was going back. I was miserable without you. I loved you so much, I was ready to go back and make it work. I even had my plane ticket reserved.” She took a deep breath. “Mom convinced me to wait. She said if you loved me, you’d come get me. If you didn’t, then it was for the best. I believed her.” He squeezed her hand. She raised her eyes to meet his. “She was your mother. Of course you believed her. I believed her when she said I couldn’t make you happy. We both could have done lots of things differently. It doesn’t matter now. I love you and we have each other.” He stroked her cheek. Tears filled her eyes. “All those wasted years though, Ethan. How can I ever make it up to you?” “The slate’s clean. It’s a wash. I could have kept trying. It’s not like I didn’t think about you all the time.” He pulled her into 140

Heart of the Storm his arms. “It’s like the ocean, Charlie. You can’t push it, or predict it. You can just love it.” With her cheek against his heart, she finally felt at home. Kevin found her there a little later. “Well, Bitty, think I could talk to you and Ethan for a moment?” Feeling her face grow hot, Charlene scrambled off the bed and sat down in the chair at Ethan’s bedside. “What is it?” Whatever humor that was in Kevin’s face disappeared. “They can’t find Mom.” Charlene looked at him. “You mean she’s gotten away?” Kevin nodded. “There were signs that she got to the cabin Stabler told the authorities about, but she apparently has other resources.” Her mother was on the run. How long could she be out there? Charlene sighed. “It’s her choice. What happened to Stabler?” “The agents took him back to Washington D.C. They don’t believe he knows who Mom’s contacts are. He’s in a lot of trouble both with our government and the Russians. They hold him responsible for Vlad’s death.” “It’s hard to believe we’re related to him.” She shook her head. “There’s more.” Her brother’s voice gave her no comfort. “More?” Charlene didn’t understand what was going on. “It looks like Mom has helped Ken Stabler in other crimes. There’s some embezzlement charges now. I guess Mom and Ken ripped off an environmental nonprofit for over a million dollars. The smuggling is only the beginning.” “How long has this been going on?” “A lot longer than we thought. She was probably using Dad’s boat.”

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Heart of the Storm “I can’t believe it!” Charlene struggled to wrap her mind around the fact that she didn’t know her mother at all. “Where would she go, Kevin?” Ethan didn’t say anything at first. Now, he piped in. “I think she’ll try and get you both. She’s done and she knows it. Life probably doesn’t mean much to her, but revenge will.” “You think she’ll try to kill us?” Charlene couldn’t get a handle on that. “We’re her children. She couldn’t do that.” Kevin spoke quietly. “She already has, Bitty.”

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Chapter 15 Charlene forgot the conversation in the two weeks she helped Ethan recover and ran the books for the boat. Kevin did take the crew back out and fished crab. Ethan was released from the hospital after only a week and Charlene took him home to Anacortes. He was weak, but getting better. When they arrived in Anacortes, Charlene felt as if she was coming home again. She was coming home. There were several changes, but it still felt exactly the same. She marveled that Ethan had lived in the same apartment for the last eight years. It was almost exactly as she remembered it. Even the carpet on the living room floor where she lost her innocence was the same. Walking in after Ethan was released from the hospital, she felt memories wash over her. Ethan came inside carefully, leaning on Charlene for support. “We can get a place that we pick out together.” Ethan looked so worried. She reached up and smoothed away the furrows between his eyes. She smiled. “No way! This place has so many good memories, Ethan. Let’s just stay here.” “I didn’t want you to feel that you were giving up everything.” Limping into the living room, Ethan still looked weak.

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Heart of the Storm Charlene put her arm around his waist and supported him toward the overstuffed couch. “I’m not giving up anything. I’m gaining everything. Lay down before you fall.” “Kevin took off yesterday.” Ethan’s lower lip stuck out in a pout, so she hid her smile. “I wish we could have seen them off. He did call from the cell phone before he left.” Her worry was coming out. She could hear it in her own voice. Putting his arms around her, Ethan stroked her hair. “Don’t worry, honey. They’ll be fine.” “This is the part I was afraid of, Ethan. I just don’t know if I can do it.” Holding her away, he put a hand under her chin and tilted it so she looked him straight in the eye. “You can do it. Have faith, Charlie. Kevin will be safe.” Tears flowed down her cheeks. “I may be unbearable to live with.” “I’m always unbearable, so don’t worry about it.” He grinned at her. She found herself laughing through her tears. “Lay down before you fall, Ethan Shannon.” She pointed to the couch. “You said that already.” He grabbed her around the waist and as he lowered himself on the couch, he brought her with him. When he winced, Charlie immediately lifted her weight off of him. “Be careful! You’ll hurt yourself again.” She checked his dressing and ran her hands over his muscles. “You’d better be careful, Charlie. Those hands of yours are going to get you in trouble.” His eyes darkened to a stormy green. Charlene grinned. “I’m always getting into trouble.” He considered her with a thoughtful expression. “Do you realize that we’re not in danger of being caught by anyone?” He 144

Heart of the Storm nuzzled her neck and scraped his teeth along the pulse at her throat. “This will be the first time we make love without worrying about someone walking in on us.” She couldn’t help it. She giggled. “How can we resist?” She straddled his legs and his bulge pressed into her thigh. He tangled his hand in her hair and brought her mouth down to his and devoured her like a desperate man. She shifted and electricity shot through her as his body pressed closer to hers. He broke the kiss. “You’ll have to help me. I’m weaker than I thought.” She gazed down on him. “Tsk. Tsk. You mean I’ll be in control?” She lifted her shirt over her head and unhooked her bra, tossing them both across the room, reveling in the heat and desire in his eyes as he watched her. Deliberately, she shifted her hips and slid her body along the bulge outlined in his pants. His eyes drifted closed and his moan vibrated through her system. “Yes,” he hissed, “If you’ll just—” His breath caught as she leaned down and her nipples rubbed his chest. “If I’ll just what?” Her teeth captured his lower lip, teasing him, tempting him. She wanted to drive him out of control, make him crazy. “Damn it, Charlie!” He arched his body and his arms banded around her waist. She nibbled his ear. “You say that a lot. Tell me what you want.” Her voice was husky and deep. His hands captured her face and he stared into her eyes. “I want to make love to you. I want to last all night. I want it to go on forever.” Her heart melted. She was putty in his hands. “Then let’s do it.” She leaned down and kissed him, a sweet and gentle kiss. For a moment, he let her set the pace and allowed her to tease him with her lips and her tongue. Then something wild was 145

Heart of the Storm unleashed and his mouth devoured her, consumed her. His arms tightened and pressed her body so close to him she couldn’t breathe. One hand thrust down her pants and his fingers dug into the soft flesh of her backside. She squirmed and moaned beneath the pressure of his touch. His fingers trembled as they left her butt and fumbled with the buttons of her pants. She breathed encouragement as he unzipped and yanked down her trousers. When her naked flesh rose above him, he gasped. Her hands shook as she hauled his jeans off of him. She removed his shirt with gentle, slower movements so she didn’t hurt him. His hands cupped her breasts and when she managed to pull the shirt over his head, he leaned forward and captured one of her nipples in his mouth. His tongue slid around the ridges and she cried out as sensations flooded through her. She straddled his hips as he left one breast for the other giving each nipple loving attention. He resisted when she tried to capture his penis inside her body and dug his fingers into her hips to keep her still. “Please, Ethan!” She wanted him inside her, to complete her. “Slow and easy,” he murmured as he ran his tongue along the valley between her breasts. “We’re always in a hurry.” She arched her back and her hips thrust toward him. He rolled off the couch and she landed on her back on the floor. He loomed over her, his gaze warm on her face. “Remember? The first time?” The tip of his penis rubbed the entrance of her wet tunnel. “I remember.” She touched his face with her hand and he leaned into it. He slid his tongue over her body beginning with her breasts and down to her bellybutton. The trail of heat spread along her muscles until she didn’t think she could take any more. When he 146

Heart of the Storm reached his goal, she was panting, ready for him to brand her as his. He took possession of her sensitive nub with his teeth and she careened into pleasure. She didn’t cry out, she shouted. She would have shot off the floor if his hand on her chest hadn’t held her down. She convulsed as he nipped and licked her erect flesh, waves of electricity washing over her until she didn’t think she was breathing. Once more, he stroked her sensitive flesh with his tongue until she splintered into pieces. She was still pulsating, lost in the pleasure when he put his hands on either side of her face. “Look at me.” Her eyes fluttered open and she stared into his, both fascinated and frightened by the depth of desire she found there. With excruciating slowness, he slid inside her, hard flesh meeting her soft walls. She thrust her hips up to meet him and bent her knees to draw him deeper inside. He groaned and reared back to pound forward. He held still inside her and she squirmed needing more, wanting him to move fast and hard. As if he’d read her mind, he began to pound her flesh with short blows that sent her reeling into intense pleasure. Her whole body stiffened as her orgasm slammed over her. Every muscle, every nerve was tuned to him. To Ethan. With a loud shout, he poured himself inside her. She convulsed again as his release triggered another wave of pleasure. She was still shaking when he collapsed on top of her. “Ethan! Honey, are you okay?” She ran her hands over his body. “Will you cut it out?” He lifted his head to grin at her. “That’s how this started and I don’t think I can go another round.” “I don’t think you should have gone the first round,” she scolded him. 147

Heart of the Storm He caught her chin in his hand. “Oh, I think it was worth it.” What could she say to that? She grinned like an idiot. **** As the next week passed, Charlene listened to the weather reports, worrying about her brother. She knew worrying didn’t do any good, but it was difficult being on shore as Kevin went out fishing in the Bering Sea. The second week, a low moved in creating freezing spray and everything inside her wanted to beg Kevin not to go out. She decided she hated sitting at home, even with Ethan there to reassure her. Charlene decided to go out on the next trip with her brother. “Come on, Ethan.” She tried to convince him that she needed to go back out with Kevin. “This is the bad season. They need a cook. Cal is gone and Pogie is carrying the load. There’s only so much they can do. Having me cook for them will help.” “No.” His arms were crossed and his dark brows were knit together. “Absolutely not.” “Why?” Laying in his usual spot on the navy blue couch in the living room, he still looked imposing, even though Charlene knew he was still recovering. “They lost track of your mom, Charlene. That Russian crook got away and I just got you back after eight years. I’m not giving you up to get killed by your mother, a Russian mobster or the Bering Sea.” Charlene came to his side and lay on his chest. “Ethan, it will be okay. I’ll be safe with Kevin.” His arms wound around her and she could feel the strength in him now that he was better. “I know that,” he admitted. 148

Heart of the Storm “I’d be safer on the boat than I would be here. If Mom is going to do anything, she’d look for me here, not on The Celtic Rose.” “I don’t want you to go unless it’s with me.” Lifting her head, she stared into his eyes. “Then come with us. I’ve talked to Kevin. He wants you to come on the boat. He’s willing to give up the wheel if you’ll get back in the saddle.” Ethan broke away from her and started pacing the carpeted floor. “I don’t know if I’m ready.” “You’ll never know.” Charlene watched him, worried. “I’ve never been this weak.” He sounded disgusted. “I couldn’t even lift a line, much less cast one.” “You don’t have to. That’s what the crew will do.” “I should be able to do whatever they can do, Charlie. I can’t just lay it all on them.” Charlene hugged him close to her. “They want you back, Ethan.” “They’ve got Kevin.” He growled, disgruntled, which made her hide her smile against his chest. “Kevin can take Cal’s place on the boat. They’ve had a short crew. If you take back the captain’s seat, the rest of the season will go smoother.” Ethan pulled back to look at her. “How long have you and Kevin been cooking this up?” Grinning, she leaned up and kissed him. “Ever since you came home.” Shaking his head, Ethan kissed her back and then muttered, “It figures.” The last week of the season, Charlene and Ethan boarded The Celtic Rose. The crew was all there.

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Heart of the Storm Pogie slapped Ethan on the back, his grizzled face lit up with excitement. “Welcome back, Cappie. We missed you, boss.” Jamie was all smiles and Gabriel shook his hand vigorously. “Boss, we missed you very much. It is nice to see you well again.” Ethan rubbed a hand over his face. “I’m not completely better, but I’m going to take her out.” Jamie piped in. “We just wanted the cook back. Pogie’s been doing a lot of the cooking. We sure are glad to see you, Charlie.” Pogie scowled and the rest of the crew laughed. “Where’s Kevin?” Ethan asked. “Down in the engine room. One of the twin turbos lost a cylinder and we got it replaced. He’s making sure the guy put it in right,” Pogie said. “How’s the pump doing?” Ethan asked him. Pogie grinned. “Considering the shape it’s in? Pretty damn good.” “How’s the grocery supply, Jamie?” Charlie asked. “I just went while they were fixing the cylinder.” Jamie’s face fell. “Great. Thanks, Jamie. We can leave a lot earlier now.” Smiling at him, she watched Jamie relax. Ethan headed up to the wheelhouse, stepping gingerly up the ladder. Charlene watched him, trying not to be concerned. Gabriel put a hand on her shoulder. “Do not worry about him, mi amiga. He will be fine once he is behind the wheel.” With her eyes still on Ethan’s back, she said, “I hope so, Gabriel.” Home. He was truly home. Ethan walked into the wheelhouse, smelling the mix of salt air and diesel fuel, feeling 150

Heart of the Storm the gentle rocking of the boat under his feet and hearing the seagulls crying overhead. The wheelhouse looked and smelled the same. Stale cigarette, coffee and fish smells filled Ethan’s nostrils. Nothing had ever felt as good to him as the wheelhouse of this boat. Nothing except Charlene. He heard footsteps coming up from the galley. Kevin’s frame filled the doorway and his violet eyes twinkled with relief. “I’m so glad you’re back.” His deep voice was filled with welcome. Ethan felt the tension leave his shoulders. Part of him had worried that Kevin wouldn’t want to give up being the captain of The Celtic Rose. “I didn’t want to kick you out of the chair, Kevin.” “Believe me, Ethan, I’m glad. Much as I love to fish, it’s been eight years. I got us some crab, but not the big haul these guys are used to.” “A lot of the terrain has changed,” Ethan said, understanding Kevin’s frustration. “In all kinds of ways.” Kevin raked a giant hand through his hair. “Do you know how many regulations have been added since I was a captain?” Bewilderment was all over his face. Nodding, Ethan leaned back against the console. “I know. They’ve changed almost every year since you’ve been gone. How did you manage it?” “I didn’t get caught,” Kevin said, grinning. Laughing, Ethan crossed to his friend. “Thanks for covering my ass, Kevin.” “Thanks for saving mine, Ethan.” “Will you take Cal’s place until you get your own boat?” Kevin nodded. “Absolutely. I need to get back in the groove. It’s been way too long since I worked on the deck.” 151

Heart of the Storm “Great. I’m hoping to get out of here tomorrow. Did they put the cylinder in right?” “Yeah. How in the world did you score Dutch’s boat? Not every boat has a twin turbo and two six-cylinder engines. That’s a lot of power. You must have done some great fishing while I was gone.” Ethan looked onto the bow of the boat. “I buried myself in work.” “Because of Bitty?” He nodded. “I didn’t know what else to do. My mistake was that I let Mona convince me I wasn’t good enough for Charlie.” “Mom wasn’t going to let her daughter marry you, Ethan. I’d say she was driven to keep you guys apart. You’ve got her now.” Smiling, Ethan looked at Kevin. “I sure do.” The smile dropped from Kevin’s face and he frowned at Ethan. “Isn’t this the time I ask you what your intentions toward my sister are? Don’t make me have to kill you.” Ethan laughed. “My intentions are honorable, Kevin. I just want to make sure I have a livelihood before I shackle her to me.” Kevin shook his head. “She’s already shackled. It wouldn’t matter now if you never worked again. No amount of dynamite is going to blast her away from you.” A warm feeling in Ethan’s chest spread through him. “You think so, Kevin?” “I may have been away for eight years, but there’s one thing about Bitty that hasn’t changed. She’s stubborn as hell.” **** That night, the crew stayed on the boat and had dinner. Charlene was content and happy making steaks and mashed potatoes for all the men who had been through so much with her. There was her brother, laughing and giving Jamie a bad 152

Heart of the Storm time. Pogie was more relaxed than she’d ever seen him. Gabriel was smoking a cigarette and putting in a comment here and there. Ethan came down the steps to the galley. As she met his gaze, the heat in his eyes made her breath catch. Silently handing him a cup of coffee, her fingers brushed his. Ethan pulled her close to him and kissed her right in front of the whole crew. The whoops and whistles just added to her warm feelings inside. This was her family, her home. When Ethan broke the kiss, he looked at her and grinned. “Nothing like a little encouragement.” Taking the cup of coffee from her and holding her hand, he turned them to face the crew. “I told myself when I was in that damn hospital bed that if I lived, I was going to do things right,” he announced. Charlene shot a glance at his face and tried to read his expression. What was he talking about? Ethan went on. “You guys are our family. You’re the ones who went through the mill for us. So, I decided the time to do this was when all you guys were here.” To Charlene’s shock, Ethan went down on one knee. “Charlie, eight years ago, I let you go. What I should have done doesn’t matter. Now, I want to make it permanent. I already talked to Kelly and Kevin.” Charlene’s vision blurred with tears. “Will you marry me, Charlie? I love you. I always have.” He pulled a small black box from his pocket and opened it. In it was a beautiful diamond solitaire. She could only stare at his face. His green eyes were bright with love and for a moment, Charlene remembered those moments when she was nineteen that he would look at her just the same way. “I’ll marry you. I’ve always loved you too.” Ethan surged to his feet and kissed her passionately. The rest of the crew cheered. 153

Heart of the Storm “Now that you’re all hitched up, can we get some grub?” Pogie said. “You think she can cook it up without burning it?” Kevin teased. “She’d better,” Pogie grumped. “I don’t know. She’s got an ‘in’ with the captain.” Kevin’s violet eyes twinkled. “Shut up, you two, or I won’t cook anything.” Charlene laughed. Ethan put the ring on her finger. “You’re stuck with us now, Charlie.” “I couldn’t be happier.”

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Chapter 16 Three Days Later They hit the mother lode. The pots were stuffed full of crab and there was more where that came from. Ethan had led them right to the sweet spot. Relieved, Ethan was leaning back in the captain’s chair, smoking. It only took three days for their rhythm to kick in. Even Kevin flowed easily on the deck, making the back-breaking, mind-numbing work look easy. One more spot further north. Ethan wanted to leave these pots in the water here to soak and get more crab. He took a drag off his cigarette letting his thoughts drift. He got everything he wanted. Charlene, his own boat and his best friend back. The ocean was calmer than usual, the crabs were coming in and the crew was content. It didn’t get any better than that. He started up the engines for the next short run to the north. Looking out on the deck, he saw Charlene running for the rail. It was obvious she was getting sick. Since they were on a run to the next spot, he called down to the galley. “Hey, Pogie! Would you come up and spell me?” He relinquished the wheel and headed out on deck. There she was with no life jacket again. He shook his head. “You didn’t put your life jacket on again. What am I going to do with you?” “I’m not seasick.” She coughed and gagged. 155

Heart of the Storm “Of course not, Charlie.” Grinning, he watched her eyes narrow. He loved it when she gave him hell. “I’m not seasick,” she said again slowly. The light suddenly dawned on him. Oh my God, could it be— “That’s right, smart guy. I get the privilege of telling our progeny that he or she was most likely conceived in a captain’s chair.” She looked ready to cry. Ethan was ecstatic. He let out a whoop and whisked her into his arms, twirling her around. “That’s fantastic! Are you sure?” He looked into her face. “I’m sorry, honey. Maybe this isn’t what you wanted.” He watched her lips twitch and relaxed. It was going to be okay. “I want it. I just don’t want to be hanging over the rail.” “I love you, Charlie.” He kissed her gently, marveling at how lucky they were to have a second chance. “I love you too. You’d better put me down. That shoulder isn’t totally healed yet.” He grinned at her. “Starting to play ‘Mom’ already.” She socked him in the arm, just like she used to in their childhood together. “Shut up, you big lug.” “When can we tell the crew?” he asked her. “I think we ought to wait. Just to make sure,” she said thoughtfully. **** As they arrived further north, the sea began to rumble and roll and the winds picked up to about fifty miles per hour. Ethan worried about the weather. If a storm blew in from the west, they might get caught in it. So far, they’d been blessed. Night fell and they were dropping pots in the new location when lights appeared on the port side. Ethan put binoculars up to his eyes and looked. It wasn’t a boat he knew. He used the 156

Heart of the Storm radio to try and establish contact, since their course seemed to be coming directly for The Celtic Rose. “Unknown vessel, please change your course. You are currently on a collision course.” Nothing. Ethan’s gut told him this was not good. He contacted the deck. “No more pots. We’re moving. Idiot off the port side.” The crew scrambled, dumping the pot hanging on the crane and getting ready for a rough ride. Charlene slipped into the wheelhouse. As she looked out the window with the binoculars, dread settled in her stomach. “I think your mom has found us, Charlie.” As if the other vessel knew their purpose was revealed, bullets began to fly from the other boat. “Get your butts in the galley!” Ethan yelled over the intercom. The crew ran for the galley. Charlene could see that Jamie was limping. She rushed down to the galley. “Get us out of here, Ethan,” she threw over her shoulder. The boat lurched and the chase was on. Charlene checked Jamie. It was a flesh wound and stopped bleeding soon after they were underway. A loud clang accompanied by a lurch sent Charlene and the crew flying across the galley. “What the hell was that?” Pogie shouted. “They rammed us!” Ethan called from the wheelhouse. “Is the hull intact?” Kevin called. “I don’t know.” “I’ll go look.” He started for the door. “No! Kevin, no! That’s what they’re waiting for.” Her brother’s hand landed on her shoulder. “Someone has to go, Bitty.” His voice was gentle. 157

Heart of the Storm “Not you. Not again. Why won’t she just leave us alone?” She clenched her hands. “She can’t. Get rid of us; get rid of most of the problem. I’m sure she’s being well paid for it.” Kevin’s bitter tone was emphasized by his jerky movements as he pulled on his rain jacket. “Please don’t go, Kevin.” She stood in front of him, fear pounding through her body. “Don’t worry. I’ll be careful.” He flung the door open and slipped out on deck. Charlene waited, partially closing the door and looking out into the shadows. The sudden gunfire made her start and she silently prayed for her brother. She could see the lights of the vessel running almost even with them. The boat was smaller and faster than The Celtic Rose. When it veered toward them, she held her breath. Somehow, Ethan was staying just ahead of them. She saw Kevin move out of the shadow and through the door. “There’s a little damage, but the hull is good.” He called up to Ethan as he went up the steps to the wheelhouse. Charlene stood at the foot of the stairs. She heard Kevin speaking. “Did you make the arrangements?” “Yeah. I knew this might happen.” “I was hoping she’d stay on the run. What’s the plan?” “I have to keep them off me for another four miles and the Coast Guard is waiting.” “You could’ve told me, you jerks!” she yelled up at them. “There’s the woman I remember.” Ethan was clearly amused. Muttering under her breath, she made a pot of coffee. The next four miles seemed to take forever. The Russian boat would get close enough to bump them hard, but not enough to really do any damage. They continued their barrage of bullets. 158

Heart of the Storm I should be terrified. But she wasn’t. She trusted The Celtic Rose. She trusted her brother. And most of all, she trusted Ethan. It was scary, but she knew they’d outrun the other boat. As they approached the Coast Guard vessel, Charlene noticed that there were other boats there too that looked military. This must be a big deal to them. She heard Ethan radio the Coast Guard and the whir of engines as the Russian vessel tried to reverse her course. “Attention, you are under arrest. Please cut your engines immediately.” The bullhorn on the cutter boomed across the ocean. Charlene watched, fascinated, as the military-looking boats maneuvered behind the Russian dragger. She jumped out of her skin when gunfire erupted from Ivanisovitch’s boat. The Coast Guard opened fire and for a moment, Charlene couldn’t figure out what was going on. For a moment, she saw a figure flying across the deck of the Russian boat with red hair flying. It was her mother and she was attempting to reach a fallen rifle. Even with her mixed emotions, some which bordered on hatred, Charlene held her breath. She wasn’t sure if she wanted her mother dead or not. As her mother brought the rifle up, five men dressed in camouflage boarded the vessel. Within two minutes, it was all over. All of the men left on the boat surrendered and Mona Henderson was in handcuffs. Stabler was dead. Again, Charlene had no idea how she felt about the death of an uncle she hadn’t known about and who had tried to kill her. Hallmark just wasn’t going to be able to come up with anything for her family. She felt Ethan’s arm come around her. “It’s all over, honey. It’s all over.” They were finally safe. Her brother came up to the wheelhouse and she hugged him tight. Then she turned back into the arms of her future. There, she cried on his shoulder. 159

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Chapter 17 The authorities wanted The Celtic Rose and her crew to come ashore. At least they allowed us to offload the catch. They were offloading now and it looked like the chase didn’t kill too many crabs, so they made a great haul. Ethan will be happy. As the boats docked in Dutch Harbor, Charlene saw one of the military vessels escort her mother to shore. Squaring her shoulders, she jumped ashore and went to meet them. With her stomach churning, she faced her mother. Involuntarily, she put her hand up instinctively protecting the life within her. It was difficult to meet her mother’s eyes but anger gave her the strength to do it. Her mother’s red hair was windblown and her makeup was smeared. If the death of her brother caused her grief, her face didn’t show it. “Well, Charlene, does it make you happy to see me in handcuffs?” Her mother’s voice was sharp and angry. “No, Mother, it really doesn’t.” Taking a deep breath, she tried to calm her beating heart. “I really want to understand. Why would you do this? Kevin and I loved you.” Her mother’s laugh was hollow. “Love. That doesn’t matter. I wanted money. Your father couldn’t get it for me, so I got it myself.” As Ethan came up behind Charlene, her mother became enraged. “Do you think he’ll give you anything? He’s worthless. 160

Heart of the Storm I tried to give you a better life and you threw it away. Killing you would have been a kindness.” The mother she had known was gone. This woman was a total stranger. Charlene leaned back against the solid strength Ethan silently offered her. “Ethan has already given me the best gift I could ever receive. You know what that is, Mother? His love. His trust. Most of all, he’s given me a future.” “Oh, that’s great. You’re pregnant. It figures that you couldn’t keep that from happening.” Her mother almost spat the words at her. Charlene felt Ethan’s hands on her shoulders. “I didn’t want to keep it from happening. It’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me.” She turned to Ethan and put a hand on his cheek. “Dad would be so proud. I wish he was here.” Without looking back at her mother, she took Ethan’s hand and walked away. **** “We do not have to get married.” Charlene was nearly shouting at Ethan. “You’re pregnant. Yes, we do.” His stubborn, unshaven jaw was set. Ignoring the comments and questions from the rest of the crew, Charlene stood on the deck of the boat and wouldn’t budge. “You’re not going to marry me, Ethan Shannon, because you have to. Do you understand?” That stopped him. He stopped dragging her across the deck and stood nose to nose with her. “What the hell do you mean by that?” “I mean, you’re not going to marry me because I’m pregnant.” Her hands were on her hips. The bewildered look on his face melted her heart. “I’m not marrying you because you’re pregnant,” he said, frustration threading every word. “I’m marrying you because I can’t live without you. I was barely alive for eight years after you left and 161

Heart of the Storm I’m not going back to that. I’m marrying you because I want to have a life with you and I don’t care where or what I’m doing while we have it. I’m marrying you now because you’re pregnant.” Tears filled her eyes. She couldn’t decide if she was frustrated, happy or if it was just hormones. He took her in his arms. “I know this isn’t the kind of wedding you planned. A justice of the peace isn’t very romantic, but I’ve almost lost you twice now.” He kissed her so tenderly, the tears fell. “I just don’t want to wait any longer. We’ve been waiting so long.” She reached up and held on tightly. “I don’t want you to feel shackled to me.” When he tipped her chin to look in her face, she saw the desperate need in his green eyes that had nothing to do with lust or her pregnancy. “I was shackled to you eight years ago and I’ve carried you in my heart ever since you left. Married or not, I’ll always be shackled to you.” “You’ll have to be shackled to my family too!” She was desperately searching for reasons to resist. It would be so easy to take advantage of Ethan. “It will be all over the docks about how my mom and my uncle were smuggling arms. There’ll be talk.” “I’m used to people talking about me. Who cares?” Now, she was crying in earnest. “But I’m a mess! How can I get married like this?” “I promise you can have a fancy wedding later. Please, Charlie?” He took her face in his hands. He was begging her. It was rare. When did he ever beg anyone for anything? He loved her. She loved him. Was she going to make the same mistake now that she made eight years ago? Would she let the past destroy their future? Finally, she nodded.

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Heart of the Storm It was as the “wedding” was about to begin she realized Ethan had gotten a marriage license two weeks before they left on The Celtic Rose for this trip. “You planned this? How did you do it?” Torn between anger and elation, she glared at him. “Kelly did a lot of it for me. She even got your driver’s license and stuff.” He grinned at her. “I couldn’t have done it without her.” Kelly stood by the door of the courthouse in Dutch Harbor. “Is this some kind of family conspiracy?” Charlene demanded. Ethan’s sister grinned, her blue eyes glowing with mischief. “There was no way I was going to lose a potential sister again.” The bride was losing her balance as Ethan kept dragging her toward the justice of the peace. “Wait! Don’t we need an appointment or something?” She smelled like fish, her jeans were dirty and her boots were wet. “I called Kelly. Kelly called the courthouse.” He kept pulling her down a hallway. Standing outside the door marked Justice of the Peace, he stopped. Charlene ran into his back which caused a chain reaction. Up until then, Charlene hadn’t known that Kelly, Kevin and the entire crew of The Celtic Rose was right behind them. Ethan turned around and faced her. “Decision time, Charlie.” “You’re crazy,” she stated. “About you.” She melted. “Well, I’m crazy about you.” He grinned at her. “Then let’s be crazy together. Come on, Charlie. Let’s start our future now.” As he stared into her eyes, she saw their future together. Fighting, laughing, crying and making love were all there. An eternity of the best. Everything she missed for so long was right 163

Heart of the Storm there in front of her. Threading her fingers through her hair and tucking her shirt in, she reached for the doorknob. “Let’s do this thing.” It was still a beautiful ceremony. When he took her hand and promised to cherish and love her, she felt warmth fill her. Her brother’s expression was the lightest it had been since they’d brought him home. This was paradise. Kelly and Kevin stood beside them, Gabriel looked solemn. Pogie grinned as if he was so happy he was ready to burst. Jamie beamed. Ethan looked content. It was an expression she’d never seen on his face before, not even on the ocean. Charlene eyes filled with tears as the justice of the peace pronounced them man and wife. He leaned down and kissed her. “I’ve been dreaming of this, Charlene.” “Of what?” she murmured against his lips. “Of calling you Charlie Shannon.”

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR Jennifer McKenzie is the mother of two, the wife of a redneck and a writer who loves a happy ending. She loves to read and devours books as well as writes them.

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