Hidden Force

An Ellora’s Cave Romantica Publication

www.ellorascave.com

Hidden Force ISBN 9781419913358 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. Hidden Force Copyright © 2007 Shayla Kersten Edited by Mary Moran. Photography and cover art by Les Byerley. Electronic book Publication November 2007 This book may not be reproduced or used in whole or in part by any means existing without written permission from the publisher, Ellora’s Cave Publishing, Inc.® 1056 Home Avenue, Akron OH 443103502. This book is a work of fiction and any resemblance to persons, living or dead, or places, events or locales is purely coincidental. The characters are productions of the authors’ imagination and used fictitiously.

HIDDEN FORCE

Shayla Kersten

Acknowledgement To Megan Kerans and Cynthia D’Alba.

Trademarks Acknowledgement The author acknowledges the trademarked status and trademark owners of the following wordmarks mentioned in this work of fiction: Lexus: Toyota Jidosha Kabushiki Kaisha TA Toyota Motor Corporation

Hidden Force

Chapter One The young man groaned as his brutalized flesh hit the icy pavement. His mind cried out for help but his raw throat wouldn’t let sound form. Screeching tires and the smell of burning rubber haunted his senses. His swollen eyes couldn’t open enough to see the fleeing car. Relief spread through him for a brief moment. His tormentor was gone. But relief passed into despair. Alone, naked against the freezing concrete, his pain faded into the long shadows of the night.

***** Memphis homicide detective Tony Costa stood in the chill early morning air. His breath hung over the dead, naked form of a young blond man. Vacant blue eyes accused and challenged him. “Tony!” Jeff Payton’s voice cut through the murmur of the crowd gathering at the end of the alley. Tony turned and watched as his partner ducked under the yellow tape across the narrow entrance. The tall black man strode down the middle of the alley with the crime scene team following in his wake. “Another one.” Tony turned back to the pale, still form. The cloudy January morning sky filtered a dull gray light that matched his mood. A light flurry of snow swirled around the young man’s body adding insult to injury. Jeff’s footsteps stopped next to him. “Just like the last two.” The last two similar deaths left an ache in Tony’s stomach he couldn’t shake. One of the crime scene investigators motioned Jeff and Tony out of the way. 5

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The snap and whirl of the camera startled Tony out of his reverie. “We need to follow up at the Paradiso where the other two were seen.” The gay bar where someone was picking up young blond men then killing them.

***** Ryan Nilsson flipped the water tap to off then yanked the shower curtain open. As he stepped out, steam swirled and curled around his dripping body. Using a corner of his towel, he wiped the fog from the mirror. The squeaking sound of the terrycloth on the wet glass nearly drowned the sound of his apartment door clicking shut. He grabbed his robe from the hook. Wrapping the thick, warm cloth around his damp body, he eased the bathroom door open. His instincts warned him to be cautious but his mind reminded him that only one person had access to his apartment. “Ryan,” Tony’s deep voice boomed down the hall. “In the bathroom.” Ryan pushed the door shut before the cold draft entered his warm domain. Urgent footsteps clattered down wooden floor of the hallway. With only the short warning click of the latch, the door pushed in. “Wha—” Ryan didn’t have time to finish his words before Tony’s hard body knocked him against the wall. The door slammed shut. Rough lips covered his. Shaking fingers tore at the belt of his robe then pulled away the warm material. Tony’s long coat carried the chill of the early Memphis morning. Scratchy wool pressed against his skin. Cold hands slid up Ryan’s back and pulled him into a tight embrace. Desperate need in Tony’s eyes kept Ryan from pushing him away or asking any questions. The thrill of Tony’s rough desire sent heat scorching through him. His cock responded with record speed. An ache of longing clutched at his throat as his balls tightened in surprised anticipation. 6

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Although they’d been lovers for over a year, Tony rarely instigated sex. And those few times his courage had come from several bottles of beer. In what Ryan thought was denial over his attraction to a man Tony just let things happen. But right now… A calloused hand slid over his waist then down his stomach. Fingers combed through his damp pubic hair then clutched his cock. Lips kissed a moist line down his jaw to the curve where his neck met his shoulder. A shudder of excitement raced through Ryan. His hands slid around Tony’s neck and held him tight. His lover’s clean, cold scent added to the rush of pleasure. “Want you…” Ryan almost missed the words whispered against his skin. “You have me.” He kissed the side of Tony’s throat. “What are you going to do with me?” An agonized moan vibrated against Ryan’s skin. Without a word, Tony slid to his knees. Moist, molten heat engulfed Ryan’s length. Long, deep strokes pushed him fast to the edge. Fingers wrapped around the base of his cock, tight enough to hold back his growing excitement. Ryan cupped Tony’s head. Frigid ears warmed in his palms. A large hand gripped his thigh and tugged. Encouraged, Ryan flexed his hips in a slow, rolling motion. Grunted moans vibrated around his cock. The push and pull of Tony’s hand kept Ryan moving. He raked his fingers through Tony’s short brown hair. Sweet heat around his cock made the rapidly cooling room seem colder. A shiver swept through him, a mix of chill and desire. Tony’s mouth pulled away, releasing Ryan’s dick with an audible pop. Before the heat dissipated, Tony’s body pressed him tight against the wall. “Need you,” Tony murmured. “Now…”

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Ryan slipped his fingers around Tony’s belt and flipped the leather through the buckle. When he tugged the button free, his hand brushed the tip of Tony’s engorged cock. The rasp of his zipper sounded loud in the quiet bathroom. The dark brown eyes crinkled at the corners as his panic softened. Tony leaned forward and covered Ryan’s mouth. Soft kisses so different from only moments ago, a gentle mouth nipped at Ryan lips. Through tight cotton briefs, the heat of Tony’s length warmed Ryan’s hand. A gasp of breath teased Ryan’s lips when he squeezed the thick flesh. “Oh yeah…” Tony’s hands tightened on Ryan’s waist. His hips undulated, pressing his cock into Ryan’s palm. A surge of desire swelled through Ryan with an ache so deep it stole his breath. He needed Tony so much he hurt. In spite of the unexpected visit, he knew Tony didn’t want the same things Ryan did. To Tony their relationship was about sex, about a release of tension, a friendship with benefits. At first Ryan didn’t mind but his emotions crept into the scene and now… Ryan bit the inside of his cheek, stopping forbidden words from escaping. Instead he ignored the pain in his chest and turned the tables on his lover. Grabbing Tony’s coat lapels, Ryan whirled him around. Slamming his back against the wall, he yanked Tony’s shirt up then dropped to his knees before Tony could catch his breath and retaliate. When Ryan tugged the soft cotton briefs down, Tony’s thick cock sprang free. The sticky tip brushed against Ryan cheek. Wrapping his hand around the hard flesh, he licked his way around the silky crown. He savored the bitter taste of pre-come for a brief second before sucking the hot cock deep in his mouth.

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Fingers curled in his hair and tightened almost to the point of pain. Tony’s ragged breath included soft moans of encouragement. Ryan pulled back and kissed the tip. “What do you want?” He kissed the underside of the crown then licked down the thick vein running toward the base of Tony’s cock. A harsh groan was Tony’s only answer. “Wanna fuck me?” Ryan asked before he wrapped his lips around the head and sucked hard. “God, yes…” Tony’s body jerked forward. His fingers yanked Ryan’s hair. Ryan let the hot cock slip from his mouth. As he stood, he grasped the front of Tony’s coat and pulled him toward him. With one hand clutching the scratchy wool, he reached behind him with the other and opened the door. Tony’s mouth caught his. Off balanced, they stumbled into the hall. Bouncing from one wall to the other, knocking pictures askew, they staggered down the narrow corridor. Ryan’s fingers flipped the buttons of Tony’s shirt through the buttonholes. The door to Ryan’s bedroom stood open, the bed sheets rumpled and unmade as if waiting for them. Sliding his hands between Tony’s suit jacket and his shirt, Ryan pushed both jacket and coat down his arms. The pile of material fell to the floor in their wake. Ryan’s backward shuffle came to a hard stop against the bed. Yanking the rest of Tony’s shirt free of his slacks, Ryan pushed the light material off Tony’s back. Now warm hands slipped around Ryan’s neck and slid down his back. His robe slid down his shoulders. He released his hold on Tony long enough to shrug out of the bulky cloth. Naked before his half-clothed and very aroused lover, Ryan grinned. Not how he expected to start his day, but he wasn’t about to complain. Tony’s gaze roamed up and down his body. His eyes clouded before rapid blinking cleared them.

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Something wasn’t quite right but talking would wait. Tony pushed Ryan on to the bed. With his slacks drooping around his hips, Tony strode over to the nightstand. He yanked the drawer hard, almost pulling it off its grooved tracks. Retrieving a condom and a bottle of lube from the back of the drawer, he climbed on the bed. Tossing his finds next to Ryan, he crawled across the mattress. Hard kisses bruised Ryan’s lips as an eager hand stroked his cock. Before he could gentle either motion, Ryan found himself pushed over on to his stomach. The snap of the lube cap warned him before a cold, slick finger pushed between the cheeks of his ass. A thick finger pushed into his passage followed quickly by a second. The rough entry burned but Ryan kept quiet. Some demon was riding his lover this morning. Ryan would give him whatever he needed to exorcise it. Tony pulled Ryan’s hips until he rose to his knees. The soft material of Tony’s slacks brushed his legs as he settled between Ryan’s thighs. After a few short strokes with his fingers, Tony’s cock pressed against Ryan’s anus. Cold lube eased the burn of penetration a little. Ryan bit the rumpled blanket beneath him to hold back his moan. With a long exhale, Ryan relaxed his body and allowed Tony’s cock to slide into him. Bruising fingers dug into the flesh of his hips. Tony rocked forward then eased back. One, two slow strokes then his body moved with plowing force. The tip of Ryan’s cock grazed the bedding with each jarring blow. Steadying his body by pushing his shoulders and head against the mattress, Ryan managed to get his hand around his own aching flesh. In spite of the rough treatment, or maybe because of it, Ryan’s balls tightened with need. “God, yes, Tony!” He pulled his cock with hard strokes, matching Tony’s ferocity. A strangled moan and short, jerking motions signaled Tony’s orgasm. “Ryan…”

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The emotion in Tony’s voice sent a shiver through Ryan. Fire rushed through him as his seed spilled onto the bed. Tony leaned over him and planted a flurry of kisses across his shoulders. Between the weight of his lover and the innervating orgasm, Ryan slid forward until he stretched flat under Tony’s body. Sweat and the scratch of Tony’s chest hair rubbed against his back. The frantic kisses slowed to gentle nips. A twinge of jealousy raced through Ryan. He’d never seen Tony this turned-on before. What could have sent him rushing to Ryan’s apartment so early and so horny? “Good morning,” Ryan whispered. Tony rubbed his jaw against Ryan’s neck. “Now it is…” he mumbled. “What’s up? Besides you that is.” With a long sigh, Tony’s body relaxed. His weight immobilized Ryan but the feeling wasn’t unpleasant. “I got called out early. Another murder, same MO.” Now Ryan understood. A couple of recent murders had been bugging Tony. He hadn’t talked much about them but Ryan heard the scuttlebutt at the precinct. Both victims had been young, blond and gay. Both brutally beaten, raped and left to die in an alley. Both resembled Ryan in coloring and build. Now Tony was faced with a third. “I just…” Tony’s words trailed off. Gentle kisses trailed down the side of Ryan’s neck. “God, he looked enough like you to be your twin.” The soft whisper told Ryan everything he needed to know. “I’m okay. And I have no objections to an early morning quickie.” He caught Tony’s hand and twined his fingers through his. “I’m going to need another shower though. Want to join me?” Tony nodded against Ryan’s shoulder but didn’t move.

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Ryan didn’t press him. Instead, he kissed the back of Tony’s hand and reveled in the warm weight holding him down. Tony might not be able to say he loved him but his actions said what Ryan wanted to hear.

***** Tony strode through the cluttered squad room, dodging fellow detectives and desks with practiced ease. After eight years in homicide, the office was almost his second home—after Ryan’s apartment. The thought of his lover wasn’t far from his mind these days. His young, blond, gay lover. Tony never thought those words would apply to him, especially the last two. He’d been friends with Ryan for a couple of years after getting to know him on a joint case between vice and homicide. Although only little more than seven years difference in age, Tony sometimes felt as if he were robbing the cradle. Ryan was the perfect vice cop. At twenty-five he could pass for twenty or even younger. His shaggy blond hair and lean muscular body gave him an air of innocence. The big, trusting blue eyes just added to the picture. But with his intelligence and common sense, vice had snatch him up almost from the day he left the academy. The fact he was openly gay hadn’t seemed to matter to anyone. His easy charm worked wonders with even the most hardened old-fashioned cops. Tony had been in lust with him from day one. “Tony.” Jeff’s voice startled him out of his thoughts. His partner’s dark eyes bore into him beneath a furrowed brow. “Where’d you disappear to?” “Had some business to take care of.” The business of fucking Ryan until his waking nightmare faded. “We got an ID on the victim yet?”

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“No. Just got through checking with missing persons. No one fitting his description. Of course if he just disappeared last night, there probably isn’t a report yet.” Jeff tapped a notepad on his desk. “The coroner checked the back of the guy’s hand with a black light. The Paradiso stamp was there.” Tony draped his coat over the back of his chair. The front of his desk butted up against the front of his partner’s. Lowering himself into his chair, he faced Jeff’s inquiring gaze. “How’s Ryan this morning?” Jeff’s voice was low enough so no one but Tony heard him. “Shhhh.” Tony glared across the two desks. Although Jeff had figured out his friendship with Ryan, no one else in the department knew. Jeff leaned forward, a wicked grin on his dark face and whispered, “You have that fresh-kissed look going for ya there, partner.” Tony ran a hand across his mouth and jaw. The slight sting of beard burn still teased his face. One of the hazards of screwing around with someone who hadn’t shaved yet. “Don’t worry. It’ll pass for wind chill.” Jeff leaned back in his chair with an evil chuckle. “I brought the captain up to speed on the new case. He’s anxious to catch this guy before the vultures in the media figure out it’s a serial killer.” Tony nodded. “As soon as Paradiso opens, we need to get down there.” The club was the only concrete connection between the first two victims, Mitchell Karnes and Jason Yarborough. A gay bar with a rather seedy reputation and even more unsavory clientele, the two young men had frequented the club several weeks before their deaths. Karnes was a runaway from Hazen, Arkansas. Barely eighteen, he escaped an abusive homophobic father only to die alone in a Memphis alley. His father refused to take the body for burial. The young man’s final resting place was courtesy of the city of Memphis. 13

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The other young man was a nineteen-year-old local who recently announced to his family he was gay. A more forgiving atmosphere at home hadn’t saved him. Like the young man found this morning, both were blond, blue-eyed and slender built. The killer definitely had a type. Jeff tossed a report across the desk toward Tony. “Captain Martin’s afraid the media will tag the deaths as hate crimes.” “Maybe they are,” Tony mumbled. “No, I think the killer’s gay. He’s preying on his own.” They’d had this argument off and on since Yarborough’s body had been found a month ago. “Well, only one way to know for sure…” “We find the bastard.” Tony leaned back in his chair with a sigh. A figure as familiar as his own strode through the squad room door. What was Ryan doing here? Tony’s cock twitched at the sight of him. Ryan simply waved his direction and headed into the captain’s office. A sense of foreboding slammed into Tony like the blast of an explosion.

***** Ryan knocked on the frame of the open door. “Captain Martin?” The forty-something balding man looked up from the scattered papers on his desk. “Officer Nilsson. Come in, shut the door, have a seat.” His hand waved toward a battered leather chair. Ryan pushed the door closed before he moved to the chair. “What can I help you with?” He already knew the answer. Three dead men all gay who resembled an openly gay undercover officer. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to know why homicide requested his assistance.

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Martin ran his fingers through his sparse gray hair. “You’ve heard about the Paradiso murders?” “Yes, sir.” “Patrol found another body this morning that fits the MO. We need to catch this guy before he kills again.” “How can I help?” The older man squirmed in his chair, avoiding Ryan’s gaze for a second. He settled and met Ryan’s stare head-on. “The Paradiso’s clientele is very closemouthed. We need someone on the inside. You fit the description of all three deceased. And…” His voice trailed off and a slight blush reddened the man’s cheeks. “And I’m gay.” Ryan said the words for him. “There’s that.” He nodded and lowered his eyes. “I think it would be easier for a gay officer to deal with the atmosphere of the Paradiso.” “Don’t be embarrassed. I’m not. And you’re right.” The Paradiso’s reputation for a sex club was well deserved. Unfortunately every time vice raided them, they seemed to have been warned. Ryan smiled when the man raised his head to look at him again. “I want to get the SOB off the streets as much as you do.” “So you’ll take the assignment.” “Yes.” Ryan wasn’t sure how to tell Tony. Or what he should tell Captain Martin about his relationship with the lead detective on the case.

***** Tony tried to control his racing heart with slow breaths and calm thoughts but nothing helped. Only one answer explained Ryan’s presence in homicide. After the nightmares of the past month, he wasn’t sure he could handle the obvious conclusion. As he stared at the captain’s closed door, it opened. “Costa, Payton.” Martin canted his head back toward his office.

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Tony steeled his legs as he stood. He caught Jeff’s look of concern before he forced his face into a passive expression. “Don’t say a word,” he mumbled. Jeff nodded but his apprehension showed in his frown. When Tony entered the office, Ryan looked up but didn’t speak. “Tony Costa, Jeff Payton, this is Ryan Nilsson from vice.” The captain motioned to each man as he named him. “We’re all acquainted,” Jeff said. A surge of gratitude swelled through Tony. He wasn’t sure his voice would be steady enough to say anything. “Good,” Martin said as he sat down behind his desk. “Officer Nilsson has agreed to go undercover at the Paradiso. He fits the description of the murdered men. He’s comfortable around gay lifestyles and he’s highly recommended by his superiors.” Ryan flashed a grin at the captain’s wording. “Hey, I get to drink and dance on the department’s tab. Who wouldn’t go for it?” Martin smiled and continued. “Detective Costa is the lead on this case. You’ll coordinate with him. I want you wearing a wire at all times and you’ll stay in a safe house apartment until the assignment is finished.” “A safe house?” Ryan frowned. “My apartment is fine.” Tony found his voice. “No, a safe house is best. We don’t know how the killer operates. He might not be picking up his victims at the bar. He could be following them home.” Anger roiled through him but his professional judgment made the words spill out. Ryan shouldn’t have accepted the assignment. If Tony had any say in it, Ryan would be changing his mind. “We can discuss the details later.” And with someone else. Ryan was not doing this job.

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Chapter Two Ryan followed Tony into the men’s room. Other than a terse “we need to talk”, Tony hadn’t said a word since they left Captain Martin’s office. Tony banged open the door on each of the three stalls. The bathroom was empty except for them. “You’re not doing this assignment.” His dark eyes glittered with anger as his jaw clenched. “Were we in the same meeting? Because the one I was in,” Ryan pointed to himself, “I agreed to the assignment.” “You’re going to go back in there and tell him no.” “Who the fuck do you think you are?” Anger fused through him like a firecracker headed for detonation. “I’m the lead detective on this case.” Tony’s cold tone sent a chill down Ryan’s spine. “You aren’t taking this assignment. You tell him or I will.” “Tell him what? That I can’t do this job because you’re fucking me?” As much as Ryan wanted Tony to acknowledge their relationship, he didn’t want it like this. “Keep your voice down.” Tony’s voice rose for the first time since the argument started. “Just because I let you stick your dick up my ass doesn’t mean you can tell me what to do.” “Dammit, Ryan. You can’t do this!” Ryan closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “You mean you can’t.” “Fine. Have it your way. I can’t do this.” The quiver in Tony’s voice made Ryan open his eyes.

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Although the clenched jaw remained, Tony’s eyes had softened from anger to something Ryan couldn’t quite define. Fear seemed too harsh an emotion so Ryan settled on worry. “Tony, undercover work is my job. I’ve taken care of myself for years. And you’ll have my back. I couldn’t be safer.” Ryan reached out and placed a hand on Tony’s arm. “We can do this.” A bump on the door signaled someone entering. Tony shrugged Ryan’s hand away. He nodded before he headed for the door, brushing shoulders with Jeff on his way out. Jeff watched the stiff-shouldered retreat before turning to Ryan. “Everything okay?” “Yeah, everything’s fine.” Ryan followed Tony out of the bathroom trying to convince himself his words were true.

***** “We’ll get set up for the stakeout and the safe house by tomorrow.” Tony almost couldn’t spit the next words out. “Ryan goes in tomorrow night.” He glanced up at his lover. “You’ll wear a wire.” The small interrogation room seemed to be closing around him. Ryan shook his head. “No, won’t work.” “I beg your pardon?” Jeff spoke before Tony could. “A wire won’t work in there. The music is too loud and the transmitter too hard to hide.” “What do you mean—too hard to hide?” Tony wasn’t sure he wanted to know. Ryan tilted his chair back and propped one foot on the edge of the table. “Paradiso’s reputation is well deserved. You don’t go in there unless you’re looking for sex. Most of its clientele are trying to hide their sexual preferences. Paradiso allows them to get what they want, usually in the club’s backroom and get out without even asking their sex partner’s name.” 18

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“And you know this, how?” The idea of Ryan in a place like that by choice… “Because it’s common knowledge in vice. We just haven’t been able to close them down. It’s considered a private club and they are pretty careful about checking ages. Or at least we haven’t been able to catch anyone underage there. No money changes hands for what goes on. Nothing to bust.” Jeff leaned forward, glaring at Ryan. “So this backroom stuff isn’t illegal?” Ryan shrugged. “Technically, no. There’s a membership charge to get in the club but half the clubs in Memphis charge one. No charge to use the backroom so it’s not like they’re running a brothel. My boss is hoping some of what we find out can be used to shut them down.” “So why hasn’t someone been sent in before now?” Tony asked. “It’s not been high on the priority list. For the most part there’s been no complaints. Not any reason to waste man-hours that we don’t have on an operation.” Ryan dropped his foot back to the floor and sat up in his chair. “I’ll go in without a wire, look around and see what I can find out. You’re outside, covering all exits. I’ll be fine.” “Back to the ‘can’t hide a wire’ issue.” Jeff waved his hand like a schoolkid with a question. “You never explained why.” Ryan met Tony’s gaze. “Because the minute I walk in that door, everywhere I would normally hide a wire is up for grabs.” Cool blue eyes almost twinkled in anticipation of Tony’s reaction. Tony knew Ryan was waiting for an outburst. The heated flush climbing Tony’s face accompanied his rapid heartbeat. “You can’t go in alone.” “There’s no one else.” Tiny muscles twitched at the corner of Ryan mouth. He didn’t conceal his amusement very well. “I’ll go.” “What?” Jeff barked his surprise. “I’ll go.” Tony glared at the dark man. “There isn’t anyone else.”

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“But you just heard what it’ll be like in there.” Jeff leaned forward and lowered his voice. “You may be foolin’ around with him,” his head tilted toward Ryan, “but I don’t see you putting up with that kind of shit.” Ryan laughed and leaned in. “He won’t have to. If he dresses and acts appropriately, no one will touch him.” “Why can’t you do that?” Jeff brow wrinkled in confusion. “Because I’m going in twinked out. All the victims were a certain body type, last seen dressed a certain way. If I go in trying to attract the killer, I have to behave the same way.” Tony narrowed his eyes at his lover. “And exactly how would you behave?” “Like I’m ready, willing and able for anything.” “Oh, I’m definitely going in there.” Jealousy combined with a rush of arousal. The idea of Ryan strutting his stuff in public was strangely erotic. “Wait—” Jeff interrupted his thoughts, “you can’t go in there. You’ve been there before when we tried questioning people about the victims.” “Not a problem. He won’t look anything like the suit-and-trench-coat cop. I’ll see to that.” Ryan’s chuckle sounded suspiciously like a giggle. “I don’t like the idea of you leaving yourself open to this guy,” Tony growled. “You don’t have a choice. It’s a done deal.” Ryan’s glare matched Tony’s mood “And I have a few things to wrap up with vice.” He pushed his chair away from the table. “We can talk more later.” He grinned at Tony. “And don’t shave. It’ll help complete the picture.” Tony watched Ryan walk away. The tightness in his chest wouldn’t stop. “You okay with this?” Jeff’s words pulled Tony back to the business at hand. “Yeah.” “So what was the scene in the bathroom about?” Tony’s gaze darted up at his partner. “What do you mean?” 20

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“I heard a little bit before I banged on the door.” Jeff shrugged. “I eavesdropped. So shoot me.” “Don’t tempt me.” Tony glared at Jeff’s unrepentant expression. “Hey, I’m on this case too. If you have a problem, I need to know about it.” Tony nodded. “Let’s get out of here. Get some coffee or something.” He needed some air. He grabbed his coat from the back of his chair as they passed by his desk. Jeff followed suit and soon the stairwell clattered with their footsteps. Pushing the glass door open to the outside world, Tony took a deep, calming breath. The cold air burned his lungs but helped cool the flush of anger and fear running through his veins. “So talk,” Jeff said as they walked down the sidewalk toward a small diner. “This case has been giving me nightmares from the beginning.” Relief washed through Tony. He hadn’t been able to voice the irrational fear. Saying it aloud made the idea seem less ominous. “Tell me about them.” Tony stopped in the middle of the sidewalk. A man walking his dog scooted around them. Gathering his thoughts, he watched the little terrier take care of business on a light pole. “The victims…they look so much like Ryan.” He scrubbed his face with his hand. “I keep seeing his face—bruised, pale, vacant stare.” He closed his eyes. “Then this morning…” A large hand squeezed his shoulder. His eyes opened to Jeff’s concerned gaze. “How can they all look so much like him?” “Coincidence. And a lucky one for us. He’s perfect for the case. I don’t know how we’d get any information out of that crowd without someone inside.” Jeff’s dark face split with a wide grin. “He can take care of himself. We’ll be there to back him up. And once this murdering bastard is off the streets, the nightmares will stop.”

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“I know, but I can’t get rid of this feeling of…dread.” “You really care about him, don’t you?” Jeff’s smile faded. “I…” Another passerby made him pause. What did he feel for Ryan? Friendship, yes. Lust, definitely. “Hey, Costa!” A man’s voice yelled from behind. Glancing over his shoulder, Tony saw Detective Dan Foreman hurrying toward him, his coat pulled tight in the blowing cold wind. “What’s up?” “Is it true that the queer killer struck again?” Foreman’s expression seemed almost cheerful. Anger boiled through Tony’s body warding off the chill of the morning air. “Say that again and you’ll be sorry,” he growled as he clenched his fists. Foreman stepped back with a look of shock on his face. Jeff moved between him and Tony before Forman said anything else. “Back off, Foreman. If the captain hears you say something like that, you’ll be walking a beat again.” “Sorry, I didn’t mean anything by it.” A pink flush crept up Foreman’s face. “Was there something you wanted besides showing off your bigotry?” Tony mumbled through clenched jaws. “Yeah, uh…” Foreman’s gaze dropped and he ducked his head. “A missing persons report just hit the wire. Sounds like your latest victim.”

***** Ryan toed off his wet shoes as soon as he walked through the door of his apartment.

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The gray skies finally opened up and a cold, wet mix of rain and sleet pounded the streets outside. The apartment’s heater buzzed to keep up with the rapidly dropping temperature. After hanging his dripping coat on a rack near the door, he walked across the room toward the hall leading to his bedroom. The damp chill of his jeans clung to his legs. Before he reached the hall, his cell phone buzzed. He snagged it from his belt and flipped it open. “Nilsson.” “Hi there.” Tony’s low voice sent the usual tendrils of excitement through Ryan. A surge of irritation followed on its heels. Tony’s attitude earlier had really pissed him off. “What do you want?” “Can I come over? I want to talk.” “I’m not changing my mind.” Ryan curbed the urge to hang up the phone. A long sigh crept through the receiver. “I know.” After tonight, seeing Tony for anything other than the case would be unadvisable. The killer might be watching him once he showed up at Paradiso. “Okay. Where are—” A knock on the door interrupted his question. Tony’s laugh echoed in stereo from both the phone and the other side of the door. “You’re very sure of yourself, aren’t you?” Ryan retreated across the living room and pulled open the door. He ended the call as he smiled at his damp lover. A pizza box balanced on one hand, his phone in the other, Tony grinned. “Come in.” Ryan stood back and allowed Tony room to move past him. “Thanks.” Heading for the kitchen, Tony glanced over his shoulder. “Peace offering?” He held up the takeout. Ryan pushed the door closed and flipped the deadbolt before following.

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The pizza box was on the counter, open. The aroma of pepperoni and sausage filled the air. Ryan’s stomach reminded him he’d skipped lunch. Tony’s coat draped over a kitchen chair. Tony rummaged through a cabinet and pulled out a couple of paper plates. Grabbing a few paper towels, Tony nodded toward the food. “Hungry?” “Yeah.” Ryan accepted a plate then grabbed a couple of slices of pizza. “So we’re cool about the case?” He set his food on the table and walked to the refrigerator. Grabbing a couple of beers, setting one in front of Tony’s plate, he took a seat. “I still don’t like it.” Tony took a bite then grabbed the bottle. Twisting the top off, he finished chewing. “But you made it clear that I don’t have a choice.” “No, you don’t.”

***** Tony watched Ryan move around the kitchen, wrapping the leftovers, putting them away. He’d kept his thoughts about the case quiet while they ate. They’d worked their way through most of the pizza without saying much of anything at all. “They ID’d this morning’s body.” Ryan’s shoulders tightened and he hesitated while reaching for another beer. “Who was he?” “Steven Cadrin. Seventeen. His parents swear he wasn’t gay and don’t know why he would have been at Paradiso.” Tony closed his eyes at the memory of the boy’s hysterical mother. “Sometimes the parents are the last to know.” Tony opened his eyes to see Ryan standing close. “Was it like that with you?” “With my dad. But I think he was more in denial than anything else.” He set a fresh beer near Tony’s hand. “I think my mom always knew.” “Did you always know?” They’d never talked about Ryan’s past sexual experiences. The idea seemed strange to Tony now. Funny, it’d never mattered before. 24

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“Some part of me knew I was different. Girls never played a big part of my childhood. No sisters, no close female cousins. And then there’s the all-boys Catholic school.” Ryan ran his fingers through Tony’s hair. “I don’t think that made me gay. I just think that since I didn’t have a lot of female interaction, I didn’t have the indecision a lot of gay men go through.” “Like me.” “I didn’t say that.” Ryan straddled Tony’s thighs. The wooden kitchen chair groaned at their combined weight. “You didn’t have to.” Tony inhaled the scent of his lover—beer, pizza and the faint remnants of his cologne. “I did.” “So are you gay?” Warm lips caressed the side of Tony’s face. “Or do you just have a thing for me?” His hands slipped around Ryan’s lean waist. “I definitely have a thing for you.” He arched his hips, rubbing the rising bulge in his slacks against Ryan’s crotch. Ryan’s lips wandered across Tony’s jaw until he found his mouth. “I have thing for you too.” While he welcomed Ryan’s kisses, Tony’s mind mused over their conversation. Ryan was his first and only male lover. No man had ever stirred his blood as the blond devouring his mouth. If anything ever happened to him, Tony wasn’t sure what he’d do. His fear said more than he wanted to admit. His chest tightened and his throat ached with pent-up emotion. Wrapping his arms around Ryan, his hands slid up the muscled back. His need for Ryan wasn’t something he wanted to examine too closely, but right now, he wanted to crawl inside his skin with him. When he arched into Ryan, the wooden chair protested with an ominous creak. Ryan pulled away from his mouth. “I think we need to move this to a more secure location.”

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“Any ideas?” “A few.” Ryan brushed a soft kiss against his lips. “Come on.” The warm weight moved away. Calloused hands tugged at his. Tony didn’t need much prompting to stand. He needed the reassuring feel of Ryan against him, under him. Wrapping his arms around the lean body, Tony let Ryan lead them in a slow, shuffling dance toward the living room. The last gray illumination of the day left the room dim. A shaft of light from the kitchen followed their progress. Slow kisses and wandering hands sent heat surging through him. He pushed aside the icy sense of foreboding that had haunted him all day. Ryan was a smart cop with good instincts and could take care of himself. Plus he’d be nearby watching. Ryan maneuvered him to the couch. Falling back, Tony managed to keep his hold on Ryan. Once again straddling Tony’s lap, Ryan ran his fingers through Tony’s hair then behind his neck. Long, deep kisses, tongues tangling and rough whiskers scratching. Tony lost himself in the tangy taste and warm feel of his lover. Slipping his hands under Ryan’s sweatshirt, he pushed the material up. His fingers reveled in the smooth, taut skin layered over tight, lean muscles. Ryan broke their kiss to yank the shirt over his head. A flat tiny nipple tempted Tony. Pulling Ryan’s torso forward, his mouth latched on to the small morsel of flesh. A soft moan accompanied rough hands holding Tony’s head against the smooth chest. “Oh yeah…” Ryan arched forward, rubbing the hard ridge of his cock against Tony’s abdomen. He moved his hands around the slender waist and found the button of Ryan’s jeans. His knuckles teased the hard bulge as he flipped the metal disk through the buttonhole.

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He grated his thumbnail down the zipper then back up again before working the fly open. Sliding his hand inside tight cotton briefs, he wrapped his fingers around the hot, thick flesh. With a moaned breath of approval, Ryan’s hands tightened on Tony’s head. His hips pumped against Tony’s grip. Tony squeezed the hot cock within the tight confines but the angle was too awkward. Pulling his hand away, he grasped Ryan’s waist with both hands and flipped him over onto the couch. Untangling his body from Ryan’s, Tony knelt between the long legs. He tugged the waist of Ryan’s jeans, his fingers catching the cotton briefs as he pulled. Ryan raised his legs so Tony could strip the jeans off. Tony tossed the clothes on the floor then yanked at the damp socks. The sight of his fair-haired lover with legs sprawled, hands clutching the cushions of the couch and heavy cock resting on his stomach, sent fire surging through him. His throat caught his breath as he leaned forward to taste the leaking flesh. Bitter taste burst on his tongue. Ryan’s soft groan vibrated against his lips. “Oh yeah…” Ryan squirmed under him, shifting his hips. Tony licked from tip to base and back again. “You like?” “Tease…” His hands wrapped around Tony’s head. Gentle pressure urged him down. “Pushy, huh?” He suckled the tip. “Pushy bottoms have more fun.” Ryan’s hands emphasized his words. Sucking the thick length deep kept Tony from saying anything. Lately, more and more of his curiosity ran to places he wasn’t sure his body could go. Sometimes when Tony was buried deep in Ryan’s body, his lover’s look of complete bliss made him wonder.

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Running his tongue around the crown of Ryan’s cock, he thought about the thick flesh penetrating him, filling his hole with heat. His dick ached in the now-tight confines of his slacks. Ryan sometimes teased his ass when he sucked him but Tony always pulled away before he pushed inside. Now after making his preference clear, how could he ask Ryan to fuck him? The idea left Tony gasping around Ryan’s hot dick. He reached down and pulled his belt free of the buckle. The narrow couch made maneuvering difficult. Losing his balance, one leg slipped off the couch. The thick cock popped out of his mouth and his upper body landed on Ryan. Ryan leaned on his elbows and grinned. “I really need to get a bigger couch.” “Good idea.” Tony rolled off the cushions and got to his feet. Ryan’s naked body stretched out on the couch, highlighted only by the light from the kitchen. Refracting light, his blue eyes gave off an unearthly glow. Tony’s heart raced at the sight. His fingers trembled as he tugged his belt free and undid his fly. The need to be skin to skin against him pounded through his veins. Ryan pulled his cock with long, lazy strokes as Tony shed his clothes. One leg slipped off the couch, the other bent at the knee against the back. “Oh God…” Tony settled between the long limbs. He leaned forward, rubbing his face against the crinkly nest of hair surrounding Ryan’s cock. Inhaling deep, he savored his lover’s musky aroma. Gentle fingers teased his hair. No pressure, no urgency, just light, gentle stroking. Tony’s lips brushed just below the crown. The tip of his tongue ran down the length of the hot flesh. Nibbling first around the base, his mouth dipped down to suck on the tight scrotum. Whimpered moans from Ryan encouraged his actions. The tender fingers turned rough as Ryan scrambled for a hold on hair too short.

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While his mouth teased the wrinkled sac, Tony wrapped a hand around the hot shaft. Ryan’s hips moved against the long, slow strokes. Tony sucked one of Ryan’s balls into his mouth. His tongue kneaded the spongy texture. A little more than a year ago, Tony would have hit someone who even suggested he’d enjoy tormenting a man like this. Now the breathless moans escaping from Ryan only added to his excitement. A thrill that started with tightness in his throat coiled through his body and ended with the exquisite ache of his cock. Licking the length of Ryan’s cock, Tony’s tongue circled the leaking crown. Sticky fluid coated his tongue with a burst of bitter flavor. Ryan arched up, sinking his cock deep in Tony’s mouth. A muffled moan of apology drifted in the air. Long strokes pushed the silken crown across Tony’s tongue and deep into his throat then back out again. His fingers trailed down below Ryan’s balls and into the crevice of his ass. “Oh yeah…” Ryan pushed against Tony’s hand. “Tony…” A strangled moan drew out his name. Tony’s fingers found their target. One pushed against the tense ring of muscle. Slipping into the tight, velvet heat, he pressed his finger upward seeking the hard knot of Ryan’s prostate. Ryan’s body stiffened and trembled against the pressure. “Oh God, yes…” A fresh gush of bitterness coated Tony’s tongue. He slipped a second finger in beside the first. Curling both upward, he stroked against the hard ball of nerves. With a strangled moan, Ryan clutched Tony’s head. His hips jerked and a flood of warm seed filled Tony’s mouth. Tony cut his gaze upward.

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The light from the kitchen haloed blond hair. His eyes closed and mouth open, Ryan almost radiated his pleasure like the bright rays of the sun. Tony’s breath caught in his chest. The memory of his nightmares intruded on the moment. Sharp pain lanced through him at the thought of losing Ryan. He let the still-firm flesh slip from his mouth. Pulling his fingers free of the tight vise of Ryan’s ass, he crawled up his lover’s body. Ryan grabbed his head and yanked until their lips clashed against each other. “Fuck me. Now…” Tony’s cock jumped at his words. “No condom… Can’t wait…” Instead, he pressed against the hard body, rubbing his cock against Ryan’s. Friction eased by his own spit and Ryan’s leaking come, he set a fast rhythm. Ryan’s hungry mouth attacked his. Strong, wiry arms wrapped around him. Calloused hands grabbed his ass, pulling him hard against the warm flesh below. A few short strokes and slick, warm come smeared their stomachs. Losing the battle of tongues, Tony buried his face in Ryan’s sweat-dampened neck. His body shuddered with the final throbbing spurts of semen. Even now unable to admit it aloud, Tony mouthed the words “I love you” against Ryan’s skin.

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Chapter Three Ryan savored the heat of Tony’s body in spite of the sticky seed smeared between them. The heater ran full blast against the dropping temperatures outside. Tony’s sweat-covered back felt icy to the touch. “Hot shower?” “Good idea.” Tony nuzzled his face deeper in Ryan’s neck. The gentle caress of a kiss soothed the sting of his five o’clock shadow before he pushed up on his arms. “It’s getting a little chilly in here.” He rolled off the couch to his feet and offered a hand to Ryan. “I guess to get to the shower, I have to move.” In spite of the chill, Ryan was almost lethargic after his intense climax. “Uh, yeah.” Tony laughed as he grabbed Ryan’s hand. “Let’s go.” Ryan slid off the couch. Tony pressed against his back, pushing him toward the hall. Kisses lined his neck as they shuffled to the bathroom. Not that Ryan minded the very affectionate mood his lover was in, but it wasn’t Tony’s style. After his words this morning about the murder victims resembling Ryan and the scene in the men’s room at the precinct, he worried about Tony’s state of mind, especially concerning this case. But Ryan had a job to do. How could he say no to Captain Martin if he could help get the killer off the street? Ryan paused at the open bathroom door and fumbled for the light switch. Tony’s arms tightened around him in a rib-cracking hug. His face dipped into Ryan’s shoulder. Ryan’s hands clenched around Tony’s muscled forearms. “Come on…” The hard hug eased then Tony’s arms slipped away allowing Ryan to move to the bathtub.

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Ryan already missed the warmth lining his back. He flipped on the taps then pulled the shower lever. Tony yanked towels off a shelf and tossed them over the shower curtain rod while Ryan tested the water temperature. “Come on…” Ryan stepped into the shower. Tony followed close on his heels. Once again Tony wrapped Ryan in a tight embrace from behind. With the water streaming down Ryan’s chest, Tony’s hands rubbed the sticky residue of their loving from Ryan’s stomach. “Soap?” Tony murmured in Ryan’s ear. Ryan grabbed the bar from a built-in shelf. Tony’s fingers plucked the cake from his hands. Hot water sluiced down his chest as the slippery bar of soap made circles in his sparse chest hair. Ryan leaned back against Tony’s hard muscles and let his lover’s gentle hands tease and clean him. The hands dipped lower, across his stomach. Teasing fingers followed a trail of silky soap. Kisses fluttered against the side of his face from his temple to his jaw. His spent cock rewoke as Tony’s hands moved lower. A calloused hand wrapped around his rising flesh. “Oh, the joys of youth…” Amusement filled Tony’s whispered words. “Humph… Like you’re such an old man.” Ryan slipped a hand behind him, between Tony and him. Grasping his lover’s flaccid cock, he squeezed the malleable flesh. “You’ll learn. The difference between thirty-two and twenty-five is vast.” Tony’s soft cock thickened and filled, rising against Ryan’s ass. “Not really…” Ryan released the hardening flesh then turned within the circle of Tony’s arms. His hands slid around Tony to his ass. Pulling him close, he let the slip and slide of soapy, wet skin ease the friction of their rubbing cocks.

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Tony’s head tipped forward until their lips met in a soft, caressing kiss. His arms tightened around Ryan. The gentle kiss turned desperate; the tight embrace crushing. Ryan gasped for air but he didn’t try to pull away. Ryan trailed his fingers down the tempting cleft of Tony’s ass. Instead of inching away from the intrusion, Tony pressed back against the probing fingers. His hard kisses turned ravenous. His half-erect cock lengthened and hardened, pushing into Ryan’s stomach. With one hand, Ryan’s reached back for Tony’s hands. Snagging the soap from clenched fingers, Ryan twisted the bar around in his hand until he had a handful of lather. He set the soap in the tray. Tony pulled away from Ryan’s lips. His dark eyes glittered and his nostrils flared with rapid breath. Ryan slid his soapy hand across Tony’s lower back. He paused at the dip at the top of his ass. Encouraged by Tony’s very slight nod, Ryan’s hand dipped once again into the crack of the hard-muscled buttocks. When a soapy finger pressed against his entrance, a shudder vibrated through Tony. His arms tightened around Ryan and his face dipped into the crook of Ryan’s neck. “Yes…” The whispered word faded into the sound of the shower. A surge of lust and hope swirled through Ryan’s stomach as his finger circled the tight ring of muscle a few times. When he pushed inside, Tony’s body jerked forward then pressed back against the intrusion. Ryan stroked the tight channel aided by the slippery soap. Tony’s arms locked around him but his body rolled back and forth against Ryan’s hand.

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The water streaming down Ryan’s back turned tepid. His poor excuse for a water heater wouldn’t last much longer. “Turn around…” Ryan kept steady strokes as they maneuvered around the bathtub. He slid his finger free and let the rapidly cooling water rinse the soap from Tony’s back and ass. “Getting chilly,” Tony mumbled. “Yeah, things will warm up in the bedroom.” A ragged sigh shook Tony’s body. “Yeah…they will.” He turned and leaned over the faucet. Flipping off the shower then the tap, he turned back to Ryan. “Definitely warm up.” Ryan shuddered at Tony’s hungry look. Without looking away, Ryan grabbed one of the towels hanging on the shower curtain. His hands shook as he ran the thick terrycloth across Tony’s muscled chest. Dark brown curls covered the well-defined pecs. The trail of hair thinned to almost nothing across his stomach only to thicken just below the waist and V into an almost black nest around his thick, hard cock. His chest hurt with need for the man in front of him. More than physical need, his emotions had become involved almost from the beginning. He’d tried to avoid falling in love but he’d lost that battle long before the first time they made love. Now it seemed as if Tony were offering a part of himself Ryan never dreamed he would. Tony tugged the towel out of Ryan’s fingers. “Let’s go to bed.”

Cold air swirled around Tony’s damp body as he walked into the bedroom, but nothing could cool the fire surging through him. So many times he’d dreamed of Ryan penetrating him only to wake in a cold sweat of doubt. Now the idea had his cock so hard he was afraid one touch would send him over the edge.

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When he reached the bed, he turned around to face his lover. Ryan reached over to flip on a lamp. His supple muscles rippled with each movement. Damp, shaggy blond hair fell across his high forehead and teased the edge of his eyebrows. A half smile graced his full lips. Uncertainty shone out of the pale blue eyes. Tony grasped Ryan’s upper arms and pulled him forward. “Fuck me…” Ryan’s eyes rolled shut. His breath rasped through his open mouth and ended in a groan. Taking advantage, Tony closed in and covered Ryan’s lips with his. He wrapped his arms around the lean body. Leaning back, he fell over on the bed, pulling Ryan down with him. The slender body held a surprising amount of weight but Tony relished the feeling. Ryan’s shock must have worn off because his mouth ravaged Tony’s. Hands slid under his back, fingers dug into the flesh. Tony ran his hands up through Ryan’s disheveled damp hair. His fingers curled through the strands and held his mouth close. Tongues met and tangled. Pulling away, Ryan’s gaze met Tony’s. “Are you sure?” Tony chuckled. “Yeah, more than anything else right now, I’m sure.” And he meant it. For some reason he didn’t care to examine too closely right now, he wanted to feel Ryan inside him. Maybe Ryan read the certainty in his eyes, maybe Ryan didn’t want to question the opportunity, whatever he thought, he moved off Tony and stood. He walked over to the nightstand and opened the drawer. While Ryan rummaged for condoms and lube, Tony pulled himself up on the bed. Settling his head on a pillow, he watched Ryan set his finds on the bed.

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With a smile lighting his fair face, Ryan crawled across the bed. Straddling Tony, he lowered his body until his warmth added to the heat rushing through Tony’s veins. His heavy cock lined up with Tony’s. Tony spread his legs, letting Ryan’s settle between them. Wrapping one leg around Ryan’s thigh and his arms around Ryan’s waist, he held him tight. Blue eyes hooded by a frowning brow peered at him, returning doubt written across his face. “I’m sure,” Tony whispered. “I want to know what it’s like to be a pushy bottom.” He pulled Ryan’s head down. Planting kisses along the full lips, he arched up into the hardness poking his stomach. “Okay?” “Yeah…” Ryan exhaled hard. “Definitely okay.” Ryan rolled off Tony and onto his side. Tony missed the heat of his body. Warm hands pushed at his side, urging him onto his stomach. Snagging a pillow, Tony curled his arms under the soft cushion. The bed dipped then Ryan’s legs straddled his hips. Fingers trailed down his spine and back up again. Ryan’s weight shifted and a warm tongue replaced the calloused fingers. Moist heat slid halfway down his spine. Light kisses fluttered up to his neck. Tony squirmed with anticipation, pushing his aching cock into the mattress. Ryan’s weight moved down his legs. His tongue trailed down his spine, lower until the moist flesh dipped in the crack of his ass. Fingers parted his cheeks and the wet heat circled the sensitive ring. “Oh shit…” Tony bit the pillow to stifle his moan. Rough beard scratched the tender skin of his parted cheeks as Ryan’s tongue laved his hole. “Ryan!” Gasping for air, Tony writhed against the exquisite sensation. A single finger replaced the hot tongue. The relaxed muscle parted as Ryan pushed into him. A slow burn teased the ring with the easy, short strokes.

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The snap of the lube cap sent a sharp thrill coursing through his body. The calloused flesh slipped free but quickly returned. Cold lube made his breath catch and his cock twitch. This time Ryan’s finger pushed deeper. His hand pressed against Tony’s balls before he slid out. Tony pushed backward against the pressure as Ryan’s finger slid in again. His aching cock rubbed against the soft comforter. A slow, steady rhythm created a rush of tension. “More…” The pillow muffled his words. He lifted his head. “More…” This time the word came out too loud, echoing in the silence of the room. On the next stroke, a second finger invaded with the first. The torturous teasing wasn’t enough. “Fuck. Me.” Tony gasped as a third finger pushed inside him. “Now.” His teeth gnashed into the soft pillow. Ryan’s laugh washed over him. “You passed lesson one in Pushy Bottom 101.” The calloused flesh slid out of him. The rip of a condom wrapper was followed by the snap of the lube cap. Tony wasn’t sure if the slick sound of lube was real or just his imagination. Fingers pushed cold gel into him and then disappeared. Thick flesh pressed against his ass. This time the intense burn made him tense. “Relax, Tony. Just breathe and relax.” A warm hand pressed against his back. “Let me do the work.” Tony listened to the crooning voice. His body melted into the mattress as fullness invaded him. “God, Tony…” Ryan panted the words. “So tight… Fuck. So good.”

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Tony nodded against the pillow. It was good. Ryan inside him was good. Better than any of Tony’s dreams. He rolled his hips toward Ryan then down, rubbing his cock against the bedding. Heat lined Tony’s back as Ryan lowered his weight to cover him. His hands curled under the pillow then clenched around Tony’s. Slow, rolling movements eased short strokes in and out of his ass. Each plunge brushed against nerves that sent breathless pleasure firing through him. “Oh God…” As many times as he’d massaged Ryan’s prostate, he’d never understood the ecstasy he felt…until now. Tony’s head spun with too many senses on overload. The chill air, the warm body, the hot cock plugging his ass, Ryan’s scent. His lover’s soft words…I love you… Fire surged in the pit of his stomach and raced through his cock. He bit the pillow to muffle his yell. Warm seed spurted into the blanket. Ryan’s body jerked as his teeth sank into Tony’s shoulder. His hands tightened on Tony’s as their stifled moans mingled.

***** Ryan enjoyed the warmth curled against him under the fresh comforter. Tony had made a rather large mess on the other one. A perpetual grin threatened to fix itself on Ryan’s face. He never dreamed Tony would let him top. He’d resigned himself to bottom for as long as they were together. Forever if necessary, but he’d missed the feel of tight heat around his cock. Hopefully Tony’s obvious enjoyment meant it wasn’t a one-time thing. As much as he didn’t want tonight to end, he knew Tony would leave soon. But for a little while he’d enjoy the warm body next to him. Snuggled against Ryan, his arm over his waist, Tony’s finger traced invisible designs on his arm. His warm breath teased the fine hairs on the back of Ryan’s neck.

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The only illumination came from the dim streetlight outside and the bright red numerals on the clock. Nearly midnight, Ryan waited for Tony’s usual routine to kick in. For reasons never explained, Tony didn’t stay the night. Ever. Early in their relationship Ryan had asked but the answer was always no. Politely couched in good reasons—early meeting, different schedule—but Tony always left. They’d never had sex at Tony’s apartment. Guess it would have been harder to kick Ryan out than for Tony to run away. Determined to make the most of the few minutes left, Ryan wiggled closer to Tony’s body. As much as he wanted it to last, the routine started the usual way. Tony’s arm tightened around him. The final hug… Brief kisses teased the back of Ryan’s neck. The build up to the good-night kiss… Tony cleared his throat with a little growling sound. And now for the brush off… “Can I stay?” Ryan opened his eyes as if it would help him hear. “What?” “If it’s okay with you, I’d like to stay.” Tony nuzzled his neck. “Of course…” Ryan closed his eyes and willed the dream to continue. Warmth from more than Tony’s presence engulfed him. Tony mumbled thanks before he snuggled deeper into the covers. A smile threatened to crack Ryan’s kiss-bruised lips as he twined his fingers through Tony’s and closed his eyes.

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Tony couldn’t keep the smile off his face as he strode into the squad room. In spite of another cold, gray day, waking up next to Ryan had put him in a fantastic mood. He berated himself for never staying with him before. Ryan had asked a number of times early in their relationship but Tony had been too afraid of someone finding out about them. Then Ryan stopped asking. He skidded to a stop next to his desk. Jeff looked up, his forehead crinkled into a frown but a smile teased his lips. “Kiss and make up?” Even as he shushed his partner, his grin widened. “We had to pick out my clothes for tonight. So what’s the word this morning?” “The safe house is set up with two apartments across from each other. I just phoned Ryan with the address. He’ll meet us there at four.” Jeff pushed a notepad toward Tony. Picking it up, Tony noted the address. “Good.” Jeff nodded. “I don’t like you going in there. What if someone recognizes you?” “I doubt that’ll happen. Wait until you see the clothes he picked out for me.” “Bad?” “No, not really, just not me.” Tony smiled at the memory of wandering through a secondhand clothes store with Ryan. The things they’d bought were totally out of character for Tony. He doubted he’d recognize himself. “I’m not happy about him not wearing a wire. That club is huge, not to mention the extra ‘rooms’.” “True…” Tony’s orgasmic hangover faded. Ryan was headed into harm’s way tonight. Worry put a damper on his elation. A smile tried to make a comeback as he squirmed slightly in his chair. The soreness in his ass kept resurrecting memories of last night. “Tony!” Jeff’s sharp voice pulled him back to his surroundings. “What?” 40

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“I said, the surveillance van is also ready and waiting in the motor pool.” Jeff’s intense stare unnerved Tony. “Okay, thanks.” Heat crept over Tony’s face. He had to get his head out of his ass and concentrate on work. A burst of laughter escaped as the double meaning of his thoughts hit him. Jeff glared at him over a report. “Care to share?” “Nope.” Tony chuckled. “Definitely not.”

***** Tony chuckled at the look on Jeff’s face. The outfit was definitely a far cry from Tony’s conservative suits. Even his off-duty clothing was rather simple. Not that the jeans, tank top and shirt he wore were flamboyant. Just not him. The tight tank top made Tony bless his workout routine. Every muscle in his chest showed through the black material. His faded jeans were so tight he’d be in trouble if he became excited. His cock would be confined almost to the point of torture. An unbuttoned faded denim long-sleeved shirt completed his outfit. Except for the boots. A worn pair of combat boots they’d picked up at an Army surplus store. If anyone recognized him as the stuffed-shirt suit from a few weeks ago, it’d be a miracle. He’d top off the look with a dark leather jacket. His beard grew fast so two days without shaving left his face with a heavy shadow of whiskers. Ryan was across the hall in the other apartment. Tony couldn’t wait to see what he had picked out to wear. Ryan refused to tell him, but his cryptic comments had Tony already regretting the tight jeans. “You going to be okay in there?” Jeff’s question calmed his growing ardor. “Of course, Ryan told me just to act aloof and a little arrogant. Anyone approaching will wait for me to make a move.”

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Jeff shook his head. “That’s not what I mean. Can you handle watching Ryan getting pawed over without losing your temper?” A jolt of jealousy smacked him. “I’ve been trying not to think about that.” “Well, decide if you can deal with it before you get in there. Making a scene won’t help catch the killer.” “I can handle it.” If he said it with enough confidence, maybe they’d both believe him.

***** Tony parked the car borrowed from impound under a streetlight across from the Paradiso. A few dozen cars huddled close to the old warehouse converted to a nightclub. Casting his gaze around, he surveyed the few men drifting toward the club. None of them looked directly at each other, as if no one else were on the street. The scattered light from the dilapidate marquee announcing Paradiso left a flashing gray pall over the area. Ryan wouldn’t be here for another half an hour. They’d agreed he should go in first and find a spot at the bar where he could observe. A cold gust of wind quickened Tony’s steps toward the door. His worn leather jacket wasn’t much protection against the chill night air. Tony squared his shoulder and stiffened his spine. Of all the things Ryan told him about how to act, the most important was attitude. As long as he appeared formidable, the clientele would treat him as hands-off unless he initiated something. Striding across the makeshift parking lot, Tony hoped Ryan was right. A bass beat sounded through the walls of the warehouse. When Tony opened the door, a blast of music and heat slammed into him. Pausing at the top of a short metal staircase leading down into the club, he slipped some money through an opening in a small window.

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A membership card was pushed back through. A rough-looking burly man outside the cashier’s booth held up a rubber stamp. Tony offered the back of his hand. The cold rubber pressed against his skin. He stopped at a coat-check counter opposite the cashier’s booth to hand over his jacket. Pushing the claim ticket into his pocket, he checked out his surroundings. Techno dance music filled the huge room. Male dancers wearing nothing more than g-strings dotted raised platforms around the dance floor as well as several places on the long bar. Their gyrating dance was borderline pornographic. In spite of the time, a little after ten at night, the room was crowded. Or maybe because of the hour. The last few times Tony and Jeff had canvassed the club, they’d shown up much earlier. There had been less than a third of the people present then. Tony hitched his shoulders back and planted a scowl on his face. Taking the few stairs two at a time, he pushed through the crowded dance floor, moving toward the bar. A few men made eye contact but Tony looked away. The men moved on. Evidently Ryan knew what he was talking about. No one accosted him other than the inevitable contact on a crowded dance floor. A spot at one end of the long bar opened as two men moved away. Tony took the spot and watched the pair walk toward a dark doorway draped with chains. Little light showed through but they strode with confidence through the chain curtain. Tony assumed it was one of the back rooms. His gaze swept around the dance floor automatically assessing the crowd. A real mixed bag of men—every build, every type—a true cross section of the male of the species. And they were all here for sex with other men. A bartender finally found Tony at the end of the bar. “What’ll it be?” Built like a bodybuilder, the man’s bare-shaven chest glistened with sweat or maybe a lubricant of some kind. “Scotch, neat.” He tossed a twenty on the bar.

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The man moved away to get his drink. Rippled muscles moved across his back. A pair of what looked like short boxer briefs covered a well-formed ass. His gaze wandered back to the dance floor and the myriad men moving to the blaring beat of the music. Although he’d never thought of himself as prejudiced, Tony had had a preconceived notion of how a gay man looked and acted. His vision of himself didn’t fit the pattern. He brushed off his occasional twinge of arousal around different men as an aberration, something that happened because he’d been without a woman too long. When he met Ryan, the twinge became a raging fury. His past encounters with women were cold compared to the burning fire of lust Ryan’s mere presence created. Now looking around the cavernous room, Ryan’s question from last night whispered through the blaring music. “Are you gay?” With a shudder of desire, his body answered “Yes” and his mind finally agreed. Although many of the men around him were hot to look at, his feelings for Ryan kept his gaze impassive. Lust couldn’t replace the intense passion his lover aroused. Speaking of… Tony caught a glimpse of Ryan walking in the front door. Wearing a hooded sweatshirt jacket and jeans so tight Tony didn’t think Ryan would be able to sit without cutting off vital circulation. His hair was windblown, his face red with cold. He unzipped the jacket revealing a cropped top showing five or six inches of washboard abs above low-riding jeans. Tony’s cock, already half erect from his thoughts, leapt to full arousal at the sight. When the rubber-stamp man ran a hand over Ryan’s ass, jealousy added to the heat of his desire. The urge to plant the man’s face against the nearest wall almost consumed him. “Oh fuck,” he whispered. How was he supposed to survive the scene Ryan had described?

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Chapter Four Ryan laughed at the bouncer’s growled suggestion for his next break. “Maybe…” he teased. His gaze ran around the large room seeking Tony. The strobe lights made it hard to make out anyone in particular. He’d told Tony to find a spot at the bar so he followed the line of men crowded against it. Last spot on the left, he found the familiar set of shoulders. Tony’s face was turned his direction. He hoped he hadn’t seen the bouncer grabbing his ass. Probably did but he’d been warned. Ryan ran down the stairs without another word. Mingling with the crowd, he danced his way toward the bar. It’d been a long time since he’d been to any kind of club. Tony wasn’t about to be caught in a gay bar and Ryan didn’t want to go without him. He’d been content with their hidden relationship but he did miss dancing, going out. Hands rubbed and fingers pinched as he moved across the room. Offers whispered in his ears. Evidently the outfit worked. A small, evil part of his mind wondered what Tony would think of the getup. As he twisted his way through the thinning edge of the crowd, he caught a glimpse of the man in question. Tony’s face was stoic but the flashes of light showed a glint of lust and anger in his eyes. Ryan smiled at both emotions. After last night, his hope for something more than friends with benefits surged. With hips grinding in time to the music, Ryan danced over to his jealous lover. Squeezing between Tony and the man standing next to him, Ryan pressed his ass against Tony’s groin. 45

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The hard bulge pressed back as Tony’s hand grabbed his hip. The bartender leaned over for Ryan’s order. “Beer, whatever’s cheapest,” he shouted over the noise. After the bartender nodded, Ryan pressed back against Tony. Heat lined his body from back to ass. The stubble of a five o’clock shadow scraped against his neck. Hot breath teased his ear. “You’re driving me nuts in that outfit.” Warm lips nuzzled his neck. Ryan turned his head toward Tony. “Maybe I’ll give you a private showing later.” Pressing his lips against Tony’s, his tongue teased his lover’s mouth. When the bartender placed a glass of beer on the bar, Tony tapped the bills lying next to his scotch. The man just grinned as he snagged a few dollars from the pile. Ryan snuggled back against Tony for a few more seconds. The openness of their interaction pleased him but made him wish it weren’t job related. Grabbing his beer, he shimmied out of Tony’s grasp. “Thanks for the beer.” He grinned as he danced toward the edge of the crowd. He was here on business. May as well get to it. Fleeting touches coupled with more purposeful gropes accosted him as he entered the maze of bodies. Holding his drink above his head, he didn’t try to stop anyone. Instead, he watched each man’s face for signs of something more than lust. No one capable of the abuse the young victims had suffered would be able to hide all of his darker desires. Ryan paused to dance with any man who showed interest. Although he allowed the touching, he avoided letting anyone kiss him. No sense putting Tony through any more jealousy than necessary. A grin threatened to spread across his face. He had no doubt about it—Tony was jealous. The smoldering look at the bar told the truth more than any words. And if he was jealous, maybe it meant Tony’s feelings ran deeper than he realized.

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Yet another set of hands grabbed Ryan’s hips. A hard body pressed against him from behind. The ridge of an erect cock rubbed against his ass. Ryan laughed as he turned toward the newest man trying to get into his pants. Lust in the tall well-built man’s eyes turned to shock. “Ryan!” “David?” Surprise brought Ryan to a complete stop. David March in a gay bar? “Fuck,” the man muttered. He released Ryan’s hips and fled, pushing through the crowd with almost violent blows. Ryan stood motionless in the mass of moving flesh. The glass in his hand tilted forward, beer pouring to the floor. His mind failed to focus on the present as the past slapped him in the face. Memories of David flooded him with an almost physical ache. A strong hand wrapped around his fingers and tugged the glass level again. “You’re making a little mess here.” Tony’s voice penetrated the fog of Ryan’s memories. Muscled arms wrapped around him pulling him tight. “Is there a problem?” Warm lips nuzzled his ear. “That guy…David March, I know him.” “We’re outta here.” Tony’s growl caught him by surprise. “No… Wait!” “If your cover is blown—” “It’s not.” Ryan turned in the circle of Tony’s arms. “I don’t think it is.” He forced himself to move to the music, pulling Tony along with him. “He’s someone I knew from high school. I haven’t seen him since graduation.” Tony’s fingers caught his chin and pulled his face until their gaze met. “Are you sure he doesn’t know what you do?” Ryan shook his head. “I don’t see why he would. Like I said, I haven’t seen him since graduation.”

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Grinding together to the beat of the music, Ryan couldn’t help but notice Tony’s hard cock pressing against him. Any arousal Ryan felt had fled when he saw David. Now with Tony’s arms around him and the obvious desire pushing against him, his length hardened in the tight confines of his jeans. “Damn, you’re making me so hot I can’t think straight.” Tony’s words made the ache in his groin worse. Ryan slid his hand up Tony’s chest and around his neck. Pulling his lover’s head closer, his lips sought Tony’s. Gentle pressure turned to bruising heat. Tony’s tongue demanded entrance and Ryan gave in without thought of their surroundings or purpose. Heat and the smoky taste of scotch overwhelmed Ryan. Pulling Tony closer, he let the music and Tony’s taste take control of his body. They ground against each other to the throbbing bass of the speakers. Each beat sent an almost electrical shock through his body ending with his aching groin. Tony’s lips left his abruptly. “I need you.” His hoarse voice mumbled in Ryan’s ear. “Yes—” Ryan grabbed Tony’s hand. Losing his beer on a table as they left the dance floor, he headed toward the restrooms. He knew what he was doing was wrong but his common sense had migrated south. If he didn’t get some relief, he’d never be able to concentrate on the job. From Tony’s lack of resistance, he wasn’t about to stop him. Besides, around this place, they were just doing what everyone else came here for. Ryan pushed the door open, praying a vacant stall was available. He wasn’t sure what he’d do if there wasn’t one. Luck was on his side. Pulling Tony into the tiny cubicle with him, he closed and latched the door. He didn’t have time to think after the click of the lock. Tony knocked him against the metal divider. His fingers fumbled the button of his jeans free while his mouth attacked Ryan’s.

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Not to be left out, Ryan reached for Tony’s belt. Before he could get the leather through the loop, Tony had Ryan’s jeans open and a calloused hand wrapped around his cock. The other hand tugged Ryan’s jeans down around his hips. Squatting down, Tony’s mouth engulfed Ryan’s length. His hands grabbed his ass, pulling him deep into his throat. A shiver of desire grew more intense by the forbidden nature of their tryst. They were on duty, on the job. Work slipped his mind when Tony’s fingers pushed into the crack of his ass. Ryan gave up thoughts of anything but the hot mouth and the blunt finger pressing past the tight ring of muscle guarding his anus. Heat raged through his body. Tony’s finger unerringly found his prostate. “Too much…” The pounding beat of the music permeated the walls. Ryan’s heartbeat matched the pace. Tony’s mouth took his length so deep his breath teased his skin through his public hair. His throat tightened around the tip. “Fuck!” Ryan couldn’t stop his orgasm as a wave of ecstasy slammed into him. His hips jerked forward as semen ripped through his cock. Tony pulled back. Sucking the sensitive tip, he took every spurt of come. His tongue teased the last of Ryan’s juices from the slit. Grabbing both sides of Tony’s shirt collar, Ryan pulled his lover to his feet. Slamming him against the opposite wall, Ryan devoured his mouth. One hand found Tony’s belt and finished the job of opening his jeans. Pushing the tight material down, Ryan slipped his hand inside Tony’s briefs and tightened on the hot flesh. Tony’s arms wrapped around Ryan. His mouth returned his passion, rough, hard kisses that tasted of come and alcohol.

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Ryan’s strokes matched the fervor of their kisses, pulling the hard length of flesh, slicked with leaking pre-come. He rolled his palm over the tip, gathering more moisture. Mouths merged and captured each other’s moans. Wet heat spread over Ryan’s hand, smearing onto his stomach. “Oh shit…” were Tony’s only coherent words while his body shivered through his orgasm. Ryan gentled his strokes, milking Tony’s cock dry. “Damn, Ryan, we shouldn’t have—” Breathless with passion, concern still bled through Tony’s voice. “I know. Too late to worry about it now.” He kissed away any other objections. “Besides, it gives my cover credibility.” Pressing his forehead against Tony’s, he murmured, “I guess we should get back out there.” “Yeah…”

***** The damp spot on his T-shirt made Tony self-conscious. Logic said in this light, the water stain where he’d washed away his come couldn’t be seen on the black material. His mind didn’t want to listen to logic. Ryan blended into the crowd as soon as they left the bathroom. Tony kept an eye on him as he walked back to the bar. Finding a new spot opposite his original one, he shook his head when a different bartender walked toward him. He couldn’t believe one drink had impaired his judgment so much he’d blown Ryan in a public bathroom. Part of him scoffed at the idea. Jealousy and simple lust had overcome his reason. The booze had nothing to do with it. Tony used his cell phone to text the name of the man who recognized Ryan to Jeff. To be on the safe side, he wanted him checked out. Ryan wouldn’t tell him more than his name. Tony knew there was a story there but he wouldn’t force it just yet. 50

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His gaze followed his lover around the dance floor. He noted each man Ryan danced with for more than a couple of minutes. Jealousy reared up with each touch, each grope. After the scene in the bathroom, his raging hard-on had been reduced to a half-erect simmer. Without the intense sexual tension, he had better control of his urge to pummel every man who touched Ryan. It was going to be a long night.

***** The night seemed to last forever. Ryan had forgotten what a workout dancing all night could be. Sweat matted his hair to his head. Liquid beads tickled down his back. His short T-shirt was soaked. Even his underwear was damp. His mind kept drifting away from the task at hand. Seeing David again after so many years was a shock. Memories long suppressed flashed vivid in his mind. Even David’s musky scent of sex and sweat haunted him. A tall, muscular man circled him, trailing his fingers around Ryan’s waist. His coal black hair combined with a mustache and goatee gave him an evil air. Dressed in a leather vest and tight blue jeans, he looked like the poster child for a Leatherman ad. When the man paused in front of him, Ryan ran his hands down the well-built chest, playing with the dark hair. His gaze met the dark eyes, watching for any sign of ill intent. Instead, a glimmer of amusement mixed with obvious desire. The man’s smile was open and easy. A shiver of arousal ran through Ryan in spite of himself. Ryan danced with him for a few minutes then moved on. Another man moved in. This one was opposite the last. Rail thin, clean-shaven and blond, he didn’t have the same appeal as the last man. The only thing open about him was the intense look of angry lust. His eyes glittered with maliciousness.

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Ryan glanced over at Tony. His watchful presence reassured him. He nodded slightly, knowing Tony would note the man’s description. Sure enough, Tony pulled his phone out and began punching keys. The surveillance van would watch for the man when he left the club and get his license plate. Thirst pulled him off the dance floor. Another beer would cool him down. He’d already sweated off the last one. He made a beeline for Tony’s position. It was going to be a long night.

***** Damp with sweat, a frigid blast of cold air chilled Ryan to the bone. Fortunately, Tony suggested they leave together and his car was nearby. No one in the club would think twice about him leaving with someone. Half the men he danced with wanted him to. Just not the ones he thought were possible suspects. “What about the guys in the van?” Ryan asked as they headed across the parking lot. Tony’s arm looped across Ryan’s shoulders, warding off the chill down the back of his neck. “I sent a text message that we were coming out together.” “Coming out?” Ryan laughed at his lover’s poor choice of words. Even Tony had to chuckle at the double entendre. “Not exactly what I meant.” His hand circled around to Ryan’s throat. “But I kind of like being able to do this.” Ryan tried to keep his grin from splitting his face. Maybe there was hope for a more open relationship. The warm arm slipped away when they approached the car. Ryan ran around to the passenger side and crawled in to get out of the cold wind. As soon as Tony got in the driver’s side, his cell phone rang. “Costa.” Ryan could hear the murmur of the voice on the other end but not the words. “Ha, ha… You’re so funny. Just meet us back at the apartment.” Tony flipped the phone shut and started the car. 52

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“Jeff?” “Yes,” Tony started the car and pulled away from the curb. “He said we made a cute couple.” Ryan laughed at the irritation in Tony’s voice. “When are they coming to the apartment?” “They’ll wait until the club closes. They’ve been taking pictures of each person as they leave. Maybe we can match them up to known criminals.” “So,” Ryan trailed his fingers up Tony’s thigh, “does this mean we’ll have a little time before anyone comes back to the apartment?” Tony’s hand stopped him before he reached his groin. “We can’t…” He squeezed Ryan’s hand before he moved it to the console separating them. “What happened in the club shouldn’t have. Until the operation is over, we just can’t…be together.” In spite of his words, Tony hadn’t released Ryan’s hand. Ryan squeezed Tony’s hand and settled back into the seat. The freedom of tonight’s actions had gone to his head. But the evening seemed to be a push in a new direction for them. “So tell me about David March.” That definitely spoiled the mood. Ryan pulled his hand away from Tony’s. “I knew him in high school. We were friends for a while.” “Were you lovers?” Ryan shook his head. “I wouldn’t really call it lovers. We did have sex…” He sighed and closed his eyes. His first time and not a happy memory. “We got into his parents’ liquor cabinet one night. They were gone for the weekend. We got drunk, things got out of hand and when we woke up the next morning, David was…” The pain of rejection still took his breath away. “Horrified. We barely spoke again after that. He claimed he wasn’t gay and accused me of getting him drunk on purpose.” At the top of his lungs and with fists flying.

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The warmth of Tony’s hand on his leg brought him back to the present. “But he was in a gay nightclub,” Tony said. “And the way he was rubbing against you, he wasn’t there for the drinks.” His hand squeezed his thigh. “No, I would never have made a move on him back then if I hadn’t thought he felt something for me. I didn’t think he’d come out of the closet, even to himself. Maybe he has now.” The memory of the burning intensity in David’s eyes sent a shudder through Ryan. “Or not. He wasn’t very happy to see me. Probably afraid of being recognized.” He covered Tony’s hand with his. “But I wouldn’t consider him a suspect.” “I’ll add him to the list just in case.” Ryan wanted to object but he didn’t. His memories assaulted him. How could he explain to Tony why he believed his first love wasn’t a murderer? He wasn’t sure he understood his own conviction.

***** Four nights of watching Ryan shake his ass across the dance floor at Paradiso until three in the morning was enough to drive Tony insane. Since he’d enforced the no-sex rule until the undercover job was over, his cock was at permanent half-staff. Jacking off in the shower wasn’t much fun, especially when he was alone. And still no decent leads in the murders. In spite of lack of sleep, Tony stalked through the precinct toward his desk. He couldn’t sleep, hell, he couldn’t think. They’d checked out the dozen or so men Ryan’s antics had attracted. Only three came up with any kind of record. One of them was the man Ryan knew from high school. David March had three domestic abuse calls over the last five years. His wife never pressed charges. She claimed she hadn’t called the police even though phone records showed the calls coming from the March residence. Responding officers thought it might have been one of the Marchs’ servants.

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Slipping into his desk chair, Tony picked up March’s file. Financials showed he owned a construction company, handed down from his late father. A handwritten note revealed his company had a big project down near the river, not far from the Paradiso. Could just be a coincidence. Or not. An enlarged copy of his driver’s license photo stared at Tony. The man looked older than the twenty-five years his birthdate made him. Of course, he’d be the same age as Ryan. They went to high school together. Dark eyes, dark blond hair and an expression that looked as if he wanted to be somewhere else in the world. But then, who took a good driver’s license picture? He flipped to the next file. Mitch Black—convicted of petty robbery and simple assault two years ago. Not really the profile of a killer. Ryan said the man had an anger so intense in his eyes it made him step away. The record didn’t really give them much to go on. As far as they could tell, Black was unemployed, living in a men’s hotel not too far from the Paradiso. Tony held up Black’s file in one hand and grabbed March’s in the other. Both had locations near the club, near where the bodies were found. He tossed the files on one side of his desk. Grabbing the next folder, he checked out the surveillance picture. This one left the bar with someone totally opposite the victims’ description. A tall beefy man older than the suspect had an arm slung around the shorter man’s neck. From the possessive hold, Tony didn’t think the suspect was in control of the encounter. “Whatcha doing?” Ryan’s voice interrupted his train of thought. Ryan’s lazy, drawling question sent shivers through Tony. Definitely not what he wished he were doing. His cock sprang from half dormant to full alert. He scooted his chair forward so his desk would hide the growing bulge in his slacks. “Going through these files…” He hoped his voice didn’t give away the stress Ryan’s nearness caused. “What are you doing here?”

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“The captain called me in. Jeff’s right behind me.” Ryan picked up the two files on the edge of Tony’s desk and planted his butt in their place. Thumbing open the first one, he glanced at the contents. “David’s changed a lot.” “What do you mean?” Tony stretched his legs out under the desk trying to ease the discomfort in his pants. Ryan’s proximity wasn’t helping. “He looks older than I would have thought. Like he’s had a hard life.” “Maybe living a double life does that to you.” Tony wondered if his secrets reflected in his appearance. Ryan’s questioning gaze made Tony wonder if his lover was thinking the same thing. “Hey, guys. What’s up?” Tony turned toward Jeff’s voice. “I don’t know. I wasn’t called.” “Because you were already here,” Captain Martin said from his office door. He motioned the three of them toward him. “Let’s get started.”

Ryan held back, letting Jeff and Tony take the only two guest chairs. He opted to lean against the wall where he could watch everyone’s face. People watching was one of his favorite pastimes. Probably one of the things that made him a good undercover cop. He’d learned a long time ago to read body language and faces. Subtle movements in the eyes, twitches in the muscles around the mouth, little things gave clues to a person’s intentions and truthfulness. For some reason, he’d always had a fascination with reading people even as a teenager. Which is why he thought he’d read David correctly. “Do we have any decent leads?” Captain Martin diverted Ryan’s thoughts. “A few but nothing concrete. I want to follow up on two in particular,” Tony answered. “It may be too soon for him to strike again. His first victim was nearly five weeks ago, the second almost three and the last one, five days. Sounds like a two-week

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pattern. Unless he escalates, we may have another week of waiting before he tries anything.” Jeff nodded at Tony. “That gives us time to see if any of the leads we have will play out.” “What do you want me to do?” Ryan asked. He needed some time alone to think and he’d prefer to go back to his own apartment. Seeing David March unnerved him, but thinking the man was a killer seemed unlikely. Unless a lot had changed in the last seven years. Captain Martin glanced over at Ryan as if he’d forgotten he was there. “You can go back to vice. We’ll drop the club surveillance for a couple of days while they run down the leads.” “Thanks, Captain.” Ryan looked at Tony. “Unless you need me…” He canted his head toward the door. “No. We’ll talk later.” Tony’s gaze almost smoldered. There would be more than just talk later. “I’ll check in with vice and then I’m headed home for a little while.” No sense in making Tony look for him. With a wave of his hand, Ryan slipped out the door.

***** Tony paused at the bottom of the stairs outside the precinct. Frigid air stung his face. “I need to talk to Ryan about David March.” Jeff would see through the flimsy excuse but he didn’t care. It was true but not the most urgent thing on Tony’s mind. “I’ll grab some lunch and catch up with you in about an hour?” Concern radiated from the dark brown eyes. “Sounds good.” Tony squeezed Jeff’s shoulder before he turned to leave. “Thanks.” Rushing to his car, Tony could only think about getting to Ryan. The simmering arousal of the last few days threatened to consume him. The short drive to Ryan’s apartment flew by as his mind replayed the last few nights. 57

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Visions of Ryan grinding his body against different men, teasing them on the dance floor, played across the windshield. The scene in the bathroom flashed through his mind like a poorly edited video. His cock ached with desperate need as he pulled into a parking spot in front of Ryan’s apartment building. Climbing out of the car, he looked up at the second-floor window. A parted curtain swayed shut. Hurried steps carried him through the lobby door. Taking the stairs two at a time, he arrived at Ryan’s door as it opened. Dressed in a bulky robe loosely tied at the waist, hair damp from a shower, Ryan stood back to let Tony pass. The heat of the room greeted him and combined with the flush of intense arousal. He turned as the door slammed shut. A hard body knocked him against the wall. A picture rattled precariously near his head. “God, I need you.” Ryan’s moan was almost lost in a hard kiss. “Yes…” Tony pulled at the tie on Ryan’s robe. He needed to feel the warm muscles of his lover against him. Ryan’s hands shoved at Tony’s overcoat. Tony relinquished his hold on Ryan’s robe to let his coat slide off his shoulders. “I thought you’d never get here.” Ryan’s warm breath teased Tony’s neck. “I’m so fucking horny—” Tony shut him up with a hard kiss. Ryan’s words were almost enough to make him come in his pants. Regaining his grasp on Ryan’s robe, Tony fumbled the loose knot open. Pushing the thick material off, Tony grabbed Ryan’s naked form. Ryan pressed a small foil-wrapped package into Tony’s hand. It took him a few seconds to realize the gift was a condom.

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“Fuck me now,” Ryan growled. His fingers tugged at the soft leather belt around Tony’s waist. Tony grabbed his aching cock through his slacks. Ryan’s harsh words nearly sent him over the edge. “Here. Now!” Ryan yanked Tony’s fly open and jerked his pants and briefs down. Tearing the condom package open with his teeth, Tony quickly rolled the thin, slippery latex over his length. A rough kiss bruised Tony’s mouth for a brief second before Ryan turned to face the wall. With his hands splayed against the wall, slightly bent forward at the waist and his legs spread, his body squirmed with eagerness. Tony couldn’t think past the need to be buried in the velvet heat of Ryan. With a firm grip on his cock, he pressed the tip past the tight ring of muscle. Ryan’s moans urged him to hurry but with only the lube from the condom and heightened arousal, he kept his pace slow. Anything more and he’d either hurt Ryan or come too soon. He wanted this to last longer than the incident in the Paradiso’s bathroom. And the last thing he wanted to do was hurt Ryan. Tony ran his free hand down Ryan’s taut back. Muscles strained against his touch. The tight heat slowly enveloped his cock as Ryan pushed backward to meet him. Pausing in his advance, Tony leaned his forehead against Ryan’s shoulder. “Damn,” he mumbled. “You’re so fucking tight like this.” They’d always used liberal amounts of lube and Tony made sure Ryan was ready for him. With a long exhale, Ryan pushed backward again. The rest of Tony’s length slid home. Rolling his hips, Tony’s length inched out and then back in again. “Need this… Need you…” He kissed the back of Ryan’s neck. His hands circled around the slender waist. Fingers crawled up to find a tiny rigid nipple. His other hand slid down and

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wrapped around Ryan’s leaking shaft. His teeth grazed a tight shoulder muscle. The tangy taste of sweat burst on his tongue. “Yes… Feels good…” Ryan arched against Tony as he pressed forward. “More…” Tony upped his pace, flexing his hips against Ryan’s slight movements. A steady thrust of short strokes kept Tony just below blast off. “I hated seeing other men touching you.” Even now the turmoil of the last few nights simmered just below the surface. “Part of the job…” Ryan turned his head toward Tony. The scratch of his beard grazed Tony’s forehead. “Didn’t like it…” Watching men paw his lover like dogs in heat, each of them wanting to be where Tony was now with their cocks filling Ryan’s tight ass. The sound of his heartbeat matched the thumping techno dance music of the club. A vision of Ryan in another man’s embrace, someone else’s hands sliding against his sweat-soaked skin, caressing his body invaded his mind. “Those men made you hard… Turned you on… But you’re mine!” he whispered as a wave of possessive jealousy hit him hard. His orgasm snuck up on him. With arms tight around Ryan’s body, his thrusts deepened as his cock emptied into the viselike heat. “You’re mine…”

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Chapter Five Ryan rested his head against the cool wall as the heat of Tony’s body moved away. He felt empty, not just bereft of Tony’s cock but emotionally drained. Tony’s sudden possessiveness wasn’t quite what he wanted from his lover. Nothing good ever came from jealousy. The flush of the toilet preceded Tony’s return. Ryan didn’t want to move, to turn around. He had no idea what to expect after Tony’s harsh whispers and avid declaration. “You’re mine…” “Hey, you.” Tony nuzzled the back of his neck. “Come here.” Hands tugged at his waist. “Seems I got in a hurry.” Ryan turned around. He searched for any sign of the anger he’d heard. Nothing. Tony’s slacks were fastened, his belt back in place. He’d tossed his jacket on the back of the couch. “Didn’t give you time to take care of this.” Tony’s hand wrapped around Ryan’s hard length. Tony led him over to the couch and pushed him down on the soft cushions. Kneeling between his legs, he grinned. “I know just the thing to take care of your problem.” Ryan forced a smile on his face. He wanted some time to think before he questioned him. Besides, Tony didn’t wait for a response. His mouth suckled the tip of Ryan’s shaft. Warm, moist flesh circled the crown and teased the slit.

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Leaning his head against the back of the couch, Ryan fumbled for Tony’s head. His fingers raked the short strands of hair, encouraging Tony’s actions. He needed Tony, wanted him. For the second time in his life, Ryan loved someone. Not just lust or a passing fling but a love that made his chest ache and his throat tight whenever he realized it wasn’t returned. And once again it was someone who wouldn’t acknowledge him as more than just a friend. At least Tony didn’t desert him, cut off all ties after the first time they’d made love. The memory of his encounter with David intruded with thoughts of Tony’s first time. David had always been very tactile with Ryan, touching, ruffling his hair, hugging him. For nearly two years of their three-year friendship, David had known he was gay. David said it didn’t matter. They were still friends. The touching hadn’t stopped. If anything, it had gotten worse. Tony was just the opposite. He never touched more than a handshake or a slap on the back. Until their first time. Slightly drunk, Tony had asked him about being gay. One thing led to another and Ryan demonstrated his fondness for cock by giving Tony a blowjob he’d never forget. Now Tony had surpassed his teacher in technique. Like right now. Ryan pulled his thoughts out of the past to concentrate on the present. Tony licked a wet trail down Ryan’s length to his balls. Ryan raised his leg, bent at the knee and with his foot on the edge of the couch to give him better access. Tonguing his scrotum first, Tony then sucked one of Ryan’s balls into his mouth. Heat spread through Ryan’s groin. His fingers tightened on Tony’s scalp. Not for the first time Ryan wished Tony’s hair wasn’t so short. The need to grasp some part of him and hold on was almost overwhelming. One of Tony’s hands stroked Ryan’s cock in long, slow pulls. Slick from only spit and pre-come, the friction nearly ended Ryan’s wait for satisfaction right then.

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He released Tony’s head and wrapped his hand around his lover’s. “Hold on…” The immediate need faded slightly. Tony’s warm brown eyes reflected a smile hidden by Ryan’s body. “Too much?” “Yeah…” Ryan sighed. “Just give me a minute.” Tony straightened from his crouch between Ryan’s thighs. “Sure.” His hands grasped Ryan’s arms just above the elbow. Pulling him forward, Tony’s lips teased Ryan’s mouth. “Whatever you want.” Whatever he wanted. Ryan wanted something more than a closeted fuck buddy. How could he tell Tony that? Instead he whispered, “Suck me.” A hard kiss forced his mouth open. Tony’s tongue sparred with his before he kissed his way down Ryan’s neck and chest. Wet heat engulfed his cock. Fast, deep strokes pushed him to the edge. Biting his lip against the burning need to shout his feelings to his oblivious lover, Ryan let Tony’s hot mouth take him over the precipice. His body tightened with each spasm of pleasure while his hands scrabbled for a hold on the couch cushions. Tony didn’t release him right away. Instead his tongue caressed the slowly softening flesh, teasing the sensitive head. “Enough…” Ryan tugged at his enthusiastic lover’s head. With a final lick, Tony released him. Straightening, he leaned over and placed a gentle kiss on Ryan’s mouth. His arms slid around Ryan’s neck. He welcomed the sweetness of the embrace. The rough need for sex dissipated into a more intimate desire. Ryan wanted a real relationship. Someone who’d share his bed for more than the time it took to fuck. Share his life… As a teenager, he’d had fantasies of that person being David. Now another impossible union denied him the openness he craved.

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Tony crawled up on the couch next to Ryan’s naked, sweat-covered body. As much as he’d like to enjoy the aftermath of intense sexual release, he needed information. “We need to talk.” He ran his fingers down Ryan’s almost hairless chest, spreading moisture as he went. “What about?” “David March.” Ryan’s muscles bunched under Tony’s hand. He pushed off the couch and stalked over to where his robe lay near the door. “Nothing to talk about. I haven’t seen him in seven years. There’s nothing to tell.” “What was he to you?” Tony couldn’t stop himself from pushing. “A friend.” Walking toward the hall, he growled over his shoulder, “It’s ancient history.” Tony’s mind cried out for him to drop the subject but he ignored the warning. “It could have something to do with the case.” “No, it doesn’t.” Ryan turned on him. His neck muscles bulged in his anger. “You said yourself jealousy was eating you up the last few nights. I’m not about to start playing out my past just to settle your insecurities. So mind your own fucking business!” Ryan’s pale face reddened as his voice rose. “I still think he’s suspect material.” Tony stood to face his irrational lover. His own anger sending blood rushing to his face. “He’s not. Leave him out of this.” Clenched teeth tighten Ryan’s jaw. “How can you know he isn’t when you haven’t seen him in seven years?” Ryan closed his eyes and drew in a deep breath. “The look in his eyes… It wasn’t there.” “What wasn’t there?” Tony took a few steps toward Ryan. “The anger. He was more afraid.” Ryan turned before Tony could reach him and walked down the hall toward his bedroom. 64

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Tony followed but not too close. “Afraid of what?” With his back to Tony, he whispered, “Me.” “Why would he be afraid of you?” Tony placed a gentle hand on Ryan’s shoulder. “Unless he knows you’re a cop.” He needed to know what was bothering Ryan. “No. That wasn’t it.” The anger in Ryan’s voice had dissipated. Pain replaced his ire. “I don’t want to talk about it,” he whispered.

***** Ryan jogged around his car to the driver’s side. After Tony left, Ryan decided to do his own investigating. He’d seen David’s file and the address of his company. March Construction was in the same building it was seven years ago. He’d prove David wasn’t a suspect. And maybe get some answers of his own. A flurry of memories kept his mind occupied on the short drive. The one night they’d spent as lovers had been full of fumbling, laughter and experimentation. Although David bragged to everyone at school about all the girls he’d had, that night he’d admitted it was all a lie. David and Ryan were each other’s first. At the time, curled around David, both of them damp with sweat and come, Ryan had thought they’d be each other’s last as well. His friend brought out emotions Ryan couldn’t define until that night. When he’d told David he loved him, David had admitted he felt the same way. Ryan shook his head. It wasn’t just the liquor talking. David’s look from the club had something more than fear. Ryan decided it was regret. Late afternoon found the parking lot still full. Ryan found a spot at the opposite end from the building. The cold chilled him through his coat. But even more, he knew what Tony’s reaction would be if he found out he’d come here. His steps faltered. Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea.

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A long-bed pickup, diesel engine growling, pulled up beside him. The words March Construction were blazed in red across the white paint. David’s face, frowning and pale, stared at him through the window. After a slight hesitation, the window slid down. “I want to talk,” Ryan said. David nodded. “Get in.” Ryan hurried around the truck and climbed in the passenger side. Warm air enveloped him. David’s gaze added heat. With a sigh David shoved the truck into gear. The low rumble of the heavy-duty engine vibrated through the seat. “Where are we going?” Ryan stared at a spot on the windshield. He didn’t trust himself to look at David. His expression might reveal more than he wanted. Feelings of lust, of lost opportunities and his love for Tony battled through the tense muscles of his body. “Not far. My place.” “What about your wife?” Ryan winced as soon as the words left his mouth. A quick glance showed muscles in David’s square jaw tighten. A long exhale loosened his clenched jaw. “She doesn’t live there. We’re separated.” Ryan refrained from more questions and let the tense silence fill the cab of the truck for the remainder of the drive.

***** Tony looked up at the elaborate two-story home. The columns on either side of the front door had elaborate carvings at the top. The whole house was a perfect example of the pricy Germantown suburb of Memphis. Built on a grand scale, Tony was certain he could fit everyone in his apartment building in here and have room left over. “For someone with only a wife and no kids, March sure needs a lot of space.” Jeff voiced Tony’s thoughts for him.

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“Yeah.” Tony punched the doorbell with a little more force than necessary. Elaborate chimes announced their presence. The door opened to reveal a Hispanic woman in a plain dark dress with a simple white apron. “May I help you?” A heavy accent made her words flow with an almost musical twist. “We’d like to speak with David March. Is he home?” Tony flashed his badge. The woman paled under her café au lait skin. “We’re not immigration,” Tony said. “Mr. David is not here.” “Is Mrs. March?” Maybe the wife could provide some information. Nodding, the woman motioned for them to enter. “You can wait in here.” She motioned toward an open set of double doors. Jeff led the way into the sitting room while Tony lagged behind. The over-decorated entryway was too much for Tony’s taste. Ostentatious. Not a word he normally used but it fit. As if the owner wanted to make sure everyone was aware of his wealth. The maid waited until he entered the sitting room. “I will get Señora March now. Please stay here.” “Thank you.” Tony turned to Jeff. “Do you believe this place?” His opinion of March, admittedly formed with prejudice and in part because of his connection with Ryan, sank lower than Tony thought possible. The whole place reeked of arrogant privilege. “How can I help you?” Disdain laced the terse words. Virginia March was a tall, very-fit woman. She looked as if she could have held her own against an abusive husband. But then most women didn’t fight back, even if they had the ability. Overall she wore too much makeup but the thicker patch around her right eye didn’t completely hide a healing bruise.

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“Mrs. March?” Tony held up his badge. “I’m Detective Costa and this is Detective Payton. We’d like to talk to you about your husband.” Her hand rose almost to her face then fell. “About what?” “Did he do that?” This time, her fingers traced the puffiness around her cheekbone. “No.” Again her hand fell away. “I fell.” She motioned them toward the sofa. “Please sit.” “Thank you.” Tony followed Jeff toward a white leather couch. Almost afraid to sit on it, Tony eased down on the obviously expensive furniture. Mrs. March sat in a fancy high-backed chair across a polished wood coffee table. “So now, what can I do for you, officers?” “We’re gathering information about several murders near one of your husband’s work sites. Standard procedure to eliminate possible suspects.” Tony kept his voice disinterested. Keeping bits of information to himself sometimes made people slip up. “So why aren’t you talking to him?” Tony made a show of checking his notebook. “Police records show a series of disturbance calls were placed from your home over the last six months.” “I made no such calls.” Her fingers clenched the chair’s armrests. “I don’t know who did.” Tony pointed at her face. “Are you sure you fell?” If she’d press charges against the bastard, they’d have reason to haul him in and question him. Maybe reason to search his office and vehicle. “I fell.” Her voice caught on the last word. “My husband doesn’t even live here anymore.” “When did he move out?” “Nearly two months ago.” “Our records show his place of residence as here. Where did he move to?” About the time of the first murder. Tony jotted a note on his notebook. 68

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Without his wife as a punching bag, he might have turned to another source of release. “I’d like his new address.” Tony jotted it down as she rattled it off. “Mrs. March, can you tell us why you and your husband separated?” “I’d rather not. Let’s just say he wasn’t interested in me anymore. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a dinner to attend.” Mrs. March rose without waiting for an answer. Tony and Jeff took the cue and stood. “Thank you for your help,” Tony said as they walked to the door. “And if you decide to press charges, let me know.” Checking his watch, Tony noted the time at three forty-five. “By the time we get back to town, we should be able to catch March before he leaves his office.”

***** David tossed his keys on a small table in the foyer. Ryan followed, still silent. Now he wasn’t sure what he wanted to say. The apartment was small with tasteful furniture but not what Ryan expected. David’s family had a huge house in Germantown. Their wealth was beyond anything Ryan could have imagined as a teenager. Although David had never been stuck-up over his family’s wealth, he’d enjoyed the things money provided. For David to be living in a small apartment a mile from his office seemed out of character. “How long have you lived here?” His natural curiosity won out over his confusion. “A couple of months. Since Virginia and I separated.” David turned to face Ryan. His frown combined with a slight look of panic in his eyes let Ryan know he wasn’t the only one who didn’t know what to say. “Wanna beer?” Ryan nodded. “Yeah. Sure.” Why not? He wasn’t on duty. This wasn’t an official visit. He yanked his jacket off, holding on to it as he waited. When David went into the kitchen, Ryan glanced around the room. No pictures on the wall, no mementoes, almost the look of an impersonal hotel. The furniture was

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simple—a couch, a recliner, coffee table and a television on a stand. No signs of wear. Obviously new. David cleared his throat behind Ryan. When he turned around, David’s frown had softened. An extended hand offered him an open beer. “Thanks.” Ryan took a quick swig while he gathered his thoughts. David saved him the trouble of starting the conversation. “I was surprised to see you at the Paradiso.” Ryan chuckled. “Probably not more than I was to see you.” A slight flush reddened David’s ears. “Yeah. I guess so.” He motioned toward the couch. Taking one end of the couch, Ryan tucked his coat next to him. He expected David to take the recliner but instead David eased down on the other end of the sofa. “I came out.” David exhaled hard as if the words had been suffocating him and now he was free to breathe. “That’s why you’re living here? You told your wife?” “Yeah.” David stared at the blank television screen. “I married her to prove to my father that I wasn’t gay.” He shook his head a little. “He figured out what happened that night. Or my mother did and told him. I was never really sure which.” His thumbnail scraped at the label on his beer. “I wanted to tell him the truth but I was too scared.” His head dipped forward, eyes closed and a frown furrowed his brow. “I lied. Said I got drunk and you started it. Said I was just horny and it didn’t mean anything. It wouldn’t happen again.” Ryan didn’t know what to say. Instead he sought refuge in his beer. The silence was anything but comfortable. “He still beat me.” The words startled Ryan. “I never saw—” 70

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“He was good at hiding the bruises.” David glanced at Ryan with a wry smile. “He had a lot of practice.” “I’m sorry. I didn’t know.” David shook his head. His eyes returned to the blank television. “You weren’t supposed to. I didn’t want anyone to know. By the time I was fourteen, I was already bigger than he was. I was ashamed. I should have been able to stop him.” “He was your father.” “Yeah.” His voice cracked on the single word. After a deep breath, he continued, “After he died, I realized I couldn’t keep lying to myself and to Virginia. She already suspected something was wrong. It wasn’t fair to either of us.” The ragged edge of the beer label tore free. David rolled the small piece of paper between his thumb and finger. “She really wasn’t happy about it. I agreed not to tell anyone else until after the divorce is final. Gave her the house, a shitload of alimony and agreed to stay silent for a couple of years.” His gaze darted toward Ryan. “So that’s why I was at the Paradiso. I’m not hiding from myself anymore but I’m still in hiding.” “I understand.” “That night when we… When I said I loved you… I meant it.” “So did I.” Ryan sighed. “I wondered what happened to you. When I saw you at the club, I didn’t know what to say. I panicked.” “I did a little panic of my own.” Ryan shrugged. “Definitely the last place I expected to run into you.” “I am curious, you know, why were you there. I mean, most of that crowd is like me, in the closet, ashamed. You weren’t. Even in high school.” Ryan wanted to come clean, tell him it was a police operation, that he wasn’t there looking for a quick fuck or a convenient blowjob. “I just wanted to check it out. I hadn’t been there before. Heard some pretty wild stories about the place.”

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Whether David accepted the story or not, Ryan wasn’t sure. The man just nodded then drained the rest of his beer. Holding up the empty bottle, he asked, “Want another?” Ryan shook his head. He hadn’t drunk a quarter of the one he had. He pulled his feet back against the couch as David moved between him and the coffee table. He let his mind wander when David left the room. The man had suffered in ways that caught Ryan off guard. Abuse victims sometimes became the abuser. Could David’s background have bred a murderer? He didn’t think so but seven years could make a lot of difference in a man. Especially one already adept at hiding his true nature. Ryan looked up when David returned. Instead of stepping past him, David stopped in front of Ryan. His mouth opened as if to speak then closed. Teeth tugged at his bottom lip. With a quick sigh, he sat on the coffee table, his legs framing Ryan’s. “Can we try again?” Dark eyes pleaded with Ryan. Ryan was too startled to speak and David didn’t give him much time to think. “I know I was horrible to you. And seven years is a long time but I can’t stop thinking about you, about us. I dream about it and what it would have been like if my father hadn’t found out.” “I… I…” Ryan’s mind rushed through his memories, his own regrets. David leaned forward, placing his hands on Ryan’s thighs. “Please…” Without waiting for an answer, he pressed forward. Hard lips, desperate and needy, met Ryan’s. Lost in his memories, Ryan opened to a warm, insistent tongue. He should pull away, tell David to stop, but instead he leaned in to the heat and taste of beer. Large hands caressed his upper arms with a timid touch. “Please,” David mumbled between biting kisses.

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Ryan gave in to the insistent mouth. Tongues met as David slid to the floor between Ryan’s legs. Wrapping his arms around David, Ryan welcomed the broad chest pressing against him. David’s hands slid around him. Fingers clenched at his shirt. Breathless moans punctuated his kisses. “Need you…so much.” Rough, calloused flesh slid into the back of Ryan’s jeans, pushing past the waistband of his briefs. “Oh God…” David groaned as his hand tightened on Ryan’s ass cheek. “Stay with me…please…” At the desperate need in David’s voice, Ryan’s cock already half erect, filled. Until recently Tony never acted as if he needed Ryan. Wanted him, yes, but not like this, not with frantic desire. But… “Stop.” Ryan pulled away. David’s body pressed forward, not relinquishing contact so easily. “David—stop!” David pulled back, his hands stopping at Ryan’s shoulders. “Why?” “There’s someone…I’m seeing someone. I can’t.” He wrapped his fingers around David’s wrists and moved his hands away. “I just can’t.” Anger sparked in David’s eyes. “Then what the fuck are you doing here?” David stood, his erection bulging against his jeans. “I said I wanted to talk. I just wanted to find out what happened. Why… Why you changed after—” “Well, I’ve already satisfied your curiosity. So get out.” David snatched his beer from the coffee table then stormed to the other side of the room. “Go! What are you waiting for?” Even if he wasn’t there for the reasons David wanted, Ryan didn’t want this outcome either. They had been best friends for three years. He hoped there was something of that left. Evidently not.

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Ryan set his half-finished beer down on the coffee table then stood. “I’m sorry. Looking you up was a bad idea.” “No shit.” Brightness softened the dark eyes under the frowning brow. David turned to the window. The muscles in his back stood out against his shirt. “Just leave. Have a nice life.” Ryan wanted to smooth the frown from his brow and rub the tension out of his back. Except David already misunderstood his reason for being there. Tugging his coat on, he walked to the door. With his hand on the doorknob, he hesitated. Facing the door, he said, “I’m sorry, David. If things were different—” “Just go.” His earlier anger had dissolved into weariness. Ryan sighed and did as he asked.

***** Tony checked his watch again. The trip back to Memphis hadn’t been as easy as the drive to Germantown. An accident on Interstate 240 had traffic backed up for miles. The half-hour trip turned into an hour and a half. Traffic was starting to move around the wrecked tractor-trailer rig. Almost five thirty, they’d have to catch March at home. And then he needed to talk to Ryan. He didn’t like the way he’d left him. He loved him too much to let work interfere with their relationship. “Shit…” “What’s wrong?” Jeff looked at the cars around them. He’d been so quiet Tony had forgotten he was there. “Nothing.” Nothing except he’d actually admitted to himself that he loved Ryan. The thought had always been just below the surface. Even the words had tried to slip free when he was with him. Tony had always written it off as the aftermath of really good sex. Now? “Should we wait until tomorrow to talk to March?”

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“Don’t see why. If the wife alerted him that we were coming, he might try to make a run for it.” “Okay…” The need to see Ryan, to actually say the words aloud was almost overwhelming. But it had waited this long, it could wait a couple more hours.

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Chapter Six Ryan pulled his coat up around his ears. Tiny pellets of rain laced the bitter wind. He’d tried to call for a cab before he left David’s building but rush hour being what it was, the cab service said it would be a half-hour wait. It couldn’t be more than a mile to David’s office. He could walk that far by the time the cab would show. He hadn’t expected the rain. The rumble of a heavy diesel engine crept up behind him. The familiar white pickup with March Construction markings pulled up next to him and stopped. The figure inside leaned over and popped the door latch. A spark of hope welled up. Maybe a friendship of some sort could be salvaged. He pulled the door open and climbed in.

***** Tony knocked again but no answer. “Not home.” A feeling close to relief ebbed through him. Since he’d made the shocking self-discovery earlier, the need to find Ryan nagged him to distraction. “Guess we’ll try again at his office in the morning.” “Okay, I could use an early evening tonight. This club stakeout just reminded me that I’m not young anymore.” Tony bopped his partner in the arm. “If you’re an old man, I’m in trouble.” Jeff was less than a year older than Tony. They walked back to the elevator. “Well, you have a twenty-five-year-old keeping you young. I get to go home to a cold, empty house—” “Yeah, right.” Tony had heard all of Jeff’s stories of adventures in ladyland. Jeff’s little black book was infamous around the precinct.

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The elevator doors opened revealing David March with two plastic grocery bags dangling from one hand, his keys in the other. The square shape of the bottom and the distinct clink of glass made Tony assume he was having a liquid dinner. An abusive drunk. Oh what fun… “David March?” Tony flashed his badge. “Yes. What can I do for you?” March pushed between Jeff and Tony. His keys jangled as he fumbled for his house key. “We’d like to talk to you about a series of murders near one of your construction sites.” Tony decided to jump in with both feet and not beat around the bush. Jeff’s gaze caught his and his shoulders formed a slight shrug. “Murders?” March slid the key into the keyhole and twisted it. “You mean that kid found last week?” “Yes, him and two others. All found dead within a mile radius of your construction site.” March pushed open the door and motioned for Jeff and Tony to follow him in. “I didn’t realize there was more than one.” He set the bags down in a recliner. “What can I help you with?” “Has there been anyone hanging around the area, anyone you’ve noticed who shouldn’t be there?” Tony wanted to divert the man from thinking he was a suspect. Killers tended to get overconfident and reveal too much. Especially psychopaths. Sometimes a murderer liked to insinuate himself into the case as a witness or bystander. The proximity to law enforcement investigating the case made them feel superior. “No one that I remember but I don’t spend a lot of time at the individual job sites. You’re more than welcome to come down tomorrow and talk to my men. Maybe they’ve seen someone.”

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“We’ll do that, thank you,” Jeff answered before Tony had a chance. “Do you know of any of your men who might have a violent past, especially those with any prejudice against homosexuals?” A tinge of pink touched March’s face. “I don’t abide by that kind of attitude. Against anyone.” He grabbed the two bags then stalked into the kitchen. Tony followed him. “Has there been a problem on the site?” “Only one. And he was fired.” March kept his back to Tony as he put two six packs of beer in the refrigerator. When he turned around, he held out a bottle of beer. “I suppose you’re on duty, huh?” “Yes, sir.” “Well, nothing stopping me.” He screwed off the top and tossed it toward the trashcan. If hit the wall and clattered to the floor. “This incident,” Tony said, “made you angry?” “Yes. One of the older workers—Frank Carlton—found out this new kid was gay. He made very insulting remarks, told the kid if I found out he was gay, I’d fire him. So he’d better not complain.” He took a swig of beer. “It got out of hand one day and I caught him baiting the poor kid. I fired Frank on the spot. Before I could talk to the kid, he left. Never showed back up for work. I found out from some of the other workers what Frank had said. Figured the kid thought he was out anyway, why come back?” “Baiting him? How?” Tony knew the answer but it was possible Ryan was right and March wasn’t involved. “Calling him fag, fudge packer…” He gulped at his beer. “Every kind of hateful slur for gays he could think of.” “What was the young man’s name?” If it was one of their victims, Tony might have a winner as far as suspects went. If March was telling the truth. “Jimmy Walls. I have his file at the office if you want an address.” March’s face paled. “Was he one of the…”

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“No. At least not that I know of.” He turned to see Jeff already dialing his phone. If Walls was listed with missing persons, they’d know soon enough. “What did Jimmy look like?” “Blond, slender, seventeen, working last summer during his break from school. He was a good kid, worked hard.” A slight smile softened March’s face. If he was the killer, he was putting on a good show. “I’d like to see that file and Frank Carlton’s.” “Sure, anything to help. Do you need it now? My office isn’t far away.” “Yes, if you don’t mind.” Tony stepped aside as March moved past him. His gaze met Jeff’s. His partner shrugged. March moved toward the door. “Let’s go.”

***** “I don’t know what to think,” Jeff said in the privacy of their car. “I don’t either. But then he could be sending us on a wild goose chase after this Frank person.” “If his story is true, it could be a solid lead though.” “I hope so. This case is making things…” Tony didn’t want to talk about Ryan right now. He just wanted to wrap up this part of the investigation and find Ryan. They really needed to talk. The brake lights on March’s truck reflected on the wet pavement. The rain had stopped. His turn signal added flashing yellow. The parking lot was deserted except for three trucks identical to March’s near the building and a lone sedan in the far corner. Instead of driving to the building, March’s truck swerved toward the sedan. Tony followed. As he drew near the vehicle, his heart skipped a beat. It was Ryan’s.

*****

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Ryan’s head pounded with the worst possible hangover he’d ever had. His eyes refused to open. A deep chill penetrated every muscle. “Damn…” The word echoed. Why did he feel so weak? An accident? He forced his eyelids open. Didn’t change the scenery much. Still dark. Vague shapes and outlines showed as his eyes adjusted. A small window high in the wall helped illuminate the room. His arms and shoulders ached as if he’d strained them lifting something too heavy. When he tried to stretch the kinks out, he realized his wrists were tied together behind him. Not handcuffs, not rope…maybe something leather or some kind of cloth. His mouth tasted strange. Slightly sweet. Cotton mouth. His tongue was thick with thirst. He sniffed the air. Damp soil, moldy. A basement? How’d he get here? Panic wound through his gut. Pushing the feeling down, he took deep, calming breaths. He needed to keep his head, what little of it worked. “Think,” he whispered. The last coherent memory he could conjure was of him and Tony arguing. About… “Fuck!” His brain wasn’t cooperating. The tiny window confirmed it was dark. He and Tony had argued at his apartment during the afternoon. So a number of hours had passed. Tony hadn’t wanted to see reason about David. David! They’d argued about David March. Okay… Ryan took another deep breath. He concentrated on the pain in his arms and shoulders, relaxing each muscle to ease the strain. Maybe if he sat up. Although his head pounded at just the idea, he moved his legs. “Shit.” Bound at the ankles. 80

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He had to have been lying there for a while. On his left side, his shoulder and hip were tingling with pins and needles. With an awkward roll, he ended up facedown on the cold concrete. His head throbbed in pain as thanks for the effort. The faint copper smell of blood teased his nose. So he’d been hit in the head. Hard enough to bleed. Concussion? A blow to the head could cause short-term memory loss. Although tempted to stay put until his head stopped threatening to explode, he decided to risk another roll to his right side. Lying flat on his stomach, bound at the hands and feet made him too vulnerable. Another wiggle and he rolled again. Panting with the effort only made his head hurt worse. Relaxing his body and slowing his breath, Ryan cleared his mind of the panic threatening to consume him. David! He’d gone to see David March. Disappointment and fear warred within his stomach. “Oh shit… Tony was right.”

***** “Why is Ryan’s car here?” Tony asked aloud but didn’t expect Jeff to answer. Both men climbed out of the car in a hurry but March had beaten them to the driver’s side door of Ryan’s vehicle. “Whose car is this?” Tony wanted to see what March said. Fear for Ryan’s safety coiled through his gut. “Ryan Nilsson. I saw him earlier but…” “You saw him? Here?” Tony’s fists clenched in anger. After their disagreement over March’s status as a suspect, Ryan must have decided to seek the man out himself. “Yes. He said he wanted to talk. We…ran into each other a few nights ago. Hadn’t seen each other in nearly seven years.” “So you talked. Did you leave him here?” March shook his head. “No. We went to my place. But we argued. And he left.” He turned to face Tony. “He walked back. I should have driven him back here.” 81

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The parking lot lights illuminated March’s face. Either he was a very good actor or he was almost as upset as Tony. Tony placed his money on the former. “How long ago?” “A couple of hours.” “Shit! Jeff, get on the phone—” “Already on it,” Jeff answered as he dialed his phone. “This is Detective Jeff Payton. We have an officer in trouble. I need patrols to canvas and search.” He walked back toward their sedan, his voice fading. “Officer in trouble? Ryan’s a cop?” Although March had a good two inches on him, Tony’s anger took over. Pushing March against Ryan’s car, his hand caught the man’s throat. “Yes, he’s a cop. And if anything’s happened to him, you won’t make it to trial.” March almost cowered at Tony’s ferocity. “I didn’t do anything to him. I told you, he left my apartment and I haven’t seen him since. I swear.” “Tony!” Jeff pulled him away from March. “Stop it. That’s not helping Ryan.” His breath racing almost as hard as his heart, Tony let Jeff move him away. “This place will be crawling with cops in a few minutes. We’ll find him.” Jeff’s words didn’t sooth Tony’s anger or his fear. “You can use my office to coordinate.” March rubbed his throat. Jeff’s eyes squinted in the dim light. “Will you let us search your office?” “Sure, but he didn’t go in there. I saw him in the parking lot.” “How about your apartment?” Jeff asked before Tony could find his voice. “Of course.” March let his hand fall away from his throat. “I didn’t do anything. I wouldn’t hurt him.” The man spoke with such sincerity, Tony almost believed him. But not quite.

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Blue lights flashed through the parking lot at March Construction. Tony stood outside listening to Jeff give instructions to the dozen or so officers who showed up in response to his call. “We need to talk to anyone who might have seen Officer Nilsson after four o’clock this afternoon. We found a phone call from his cell phone to a cab company at a few minutes after four. The cab company said Nilsson decided not to wait on a cab so he must have walked. I can’t emphasize the urgency of this case too much. Officer Nilsson was working undercover on a string of murders. We have no concrete suspects in the case. What we find out tonight maybe our only hope for his recovery and to put away a murderer. So let’s get going.” Tony turned away and walked back in the office. March followed on his heels. “So he came to see me because he thought I was a suspect?” “No.” Tony cleared his throat before he turned to face the man. “He came to see you because he didn’t and I did. I guess he wanted proof of your innocence.” “He didn’t say he was a cop.” March rubbed his eyes. “I thought…” “You thought what?” “Doesn’t matter. I was wrong.” “You thought he wanted to take up where you left off seven years ago?” Tony couldn’t stop the anger from bleeding through his voice. “He told you about that?” March’s eyes grew wide with surprise. “Some of it. I don’t think he told me everything.” “You were there. At the Paradiso.” This time his eyes narrowed. “I saw you when I was leaving the club.” “It was an undercover operation.” Tony turned away as a flush of heat rose from his chest. “You’re the one he was talking about. He said he was with someone now.”

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Tony turned to face his accuser just as Jeff pushed open the glass door of the office. A blast of frigid air followed him. “Mr. March, I’d like to conduct that search of your apartment now.” March kept his gaze glued to Tony’s as he handed a set of keys to Jeff. “You know where it’s at.” “You can accompany me if you like.” Jeff looked back and forth between Tony and March. “Not necessary. The only thing you’ll find of Ryan is his fingerprints on an empty beer bottle in the trash.” March glanced at Jeff before returning his stare to Tony. “Have fun.” Tony met Jeff’s questioning gaze and nodded. Cold air once again chilled Tony as Jeff left. “I made a pass at him.” Jealousy flared, pushing away any embarrassment over his secret revealed. “Why?” “Because we had something once and I wanted it back.” “You’re the reason it didn’t last the first time.” Tony’s growl caused a flinch in March’s unwavering stare. “He obviously told you more about me than he did me about you.” The man’s gaze dropped as his shoulders sagged. “He turned me down.” Relief washed through Tony but fear followed on its heels. “So what, you’ve been killing men who look like him because you couldn’t have him?” “No!” A gasp followed March’s sharp reply. “Oh my God. That’s why he was at the club. He looks like your victims.” “Exactly like the victims. And fits the description you gave us of the young man who worked for you.” Tony pulled out his notebook. “Jimmy Walls.”

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March walked over to an open door and flipped on the lights. Tony followed. After searching through a desk drawer, March fished out a set of keys and turned to a filing cabinet. “Jimmy’s file,” he mumbled as he fit a key into the lock, “should be in here.” His fingers flipped through file folders until he paused above one. “Here.” He handed the file over his shoulder to Tony. “And Frank’s file… Got it.” Slamming the file cabinet closed, he turned around to face Tony. “I would never do anything to hurt Ryan.” His gaze met Tony’s as he held out the folder. “I still love him. Do you?” Tony opened his mouth to say yes but he couldn’t do it. “None of your business.” He snatched the folder from March’s hand. March’s lips curved in an arrogant smirk. “Well then. When we find Ryan, I’m going to do whatever it takes to get him back. I’ve backed down too many times in my life when it came to things important to me. Ryan was one of them. I won’t do it again.” The urge to smash that crooked smile into a wall swept through Tony. He wanted to scream at the man, lose control, drain his fear and frustration through his fists. Instead, he walked away clenching the two folders in his hand. Crossing through the main room, he pushed through the front door. Bitter cold burned his throat and lungs as he gasped for air. “Ryan…” His voice broke over the mumbled name. The victims’ faces hovered in front of him in the darkness, cold features with open, vacant eyes accusing. Each man’s features morphed to the next and finally into Ryan’s. His buzzing phone startled him. Yanking it off his belt, he flipped it open. “Costa.” “Tony,” Jeff’s voice cut through his waking nightmare. His words curled into a ball of despair in the pit of his stomach. “Thanks.” Tony closed the phone and let his anger flare into an inferno. By the time he opened the door to the office, his rage overwhelmed his common sense. March backed up as Tony approached him until the wall stopped him.

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Tony didn’t realize he’d pulled his service revolver until he pressed it against the side of March’s head. His phone clattered to the floor leaving his left hand free to grasp March’s throat. “Witnesses say you picked him up half a mile from your apartment.” “I swear, I didn’t.” Sweat beaded March’s brow. The acrid smell of fear rose from his skin. “He’d better be alive and unharmed.” “I didn’t pick him up!” March’s chest heaved with gasps of air. “The witness saw your truck, white with the logo on the side.” “For Christ’s sake, there’s three others in my parking lot and four that my site foremen are allowed to take home with them.” “And it’d be so convenient for one of them to show up in between your apartment and your office to kidnap your old boyfriend!” “I swear it wasn’t me!” A blast of cool air warned Tony of someone entering the office. “Detective Costa, please put the weapon down.” Tony didn’t recognize the voice but he did the sound of a gun being unholstered. With a deep breath, Tony lowered his weapon and backed away from March. March slid down the wall to the floor, gasping for air. “I swear I didn’t do anything to him. I haven’t seen him since he left my apartment.” A shudder swept through Tony. He’d almost pulled the trigger—killed a man in cold blood. He turned and retreated outside. The cold air added to the shock of his actions. His nightmares about the murders were coming true and he wasn’t sure he could handle it.

*****

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Tony watched the headlights turn into the parking lot and approach the building. Screeching to a halt in the handicapped parking spot, the door opened and Jeff climbed out. “Man, Officer Hathaway reported you had a meltdown.” An overlay of anger slipped into Jeff’s tone. “If he’d confessed to anything, you’d have fucked this case.” “You think I give a shit about the case? Ryan’s out there, probably dead already!” Panic finally gained control. “I knew he shouldn’t have gotten involved in this case. I told you that, I told him that!” His voice rose with each word. Rough hands grabbed his arms and shook him. “You don’t have time for this. He’s only been missing for a few hours. He’s still alive.” Arms wrapped around him. Jeff’s voice lowered, “He’s still alive.” “I never told him I love him,” Tony whispered into Jeff’s shoulder. “You’ll have a chance. We’ll find him.” Officer Hathaway, standing in the open door of the office, cleared his throat. “Sir, Mr. March locked himself in the bathroom and won’t answer.” Tony pulled out of Jeff’s embrace. “What?” “He was sitting on the floor and his phone rang. Whatever the person on the other end said made him look sick. He bolted for the bathroom. Now he won’t come out.” Tony’s mind nagged him into replaying the scene with March. “That wasn’t his phone. That was mine. I dropped it when… I dropped it.” Jeff was hot on Tony’s heels as they ran into the office. Tony didn’t hesitate when he reached the door marked with the universal sign for men. Splintering the wooden frame with his kick sent a rush of satisfaction through him. However, the open window into the alley caused the return of the empty ache in his stomach. “Get an all points out on him. He can’t get far on foot with all the cops canvassing this neighborhood,” Jeff barked at Hathaway. “And find out who called Detective Costa and what the hell they said.”

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“Jeff, the GPS tracking on my phone…” “Right.” Jeff opened his phone.

***** Noises from outside the tiny, cold room woke Ryan from a half-dazed sleep. He’d tried to stay awake, to be ready if someone came in but his head injury had him barely lucid. His patchy dreams of Tony and the warmth of his body were more appealing than his current situation. A jangle of chains preceded the door opening. Bright light blinded him to all but a silhouette of his captor. “I’m a cop and if you know what’s good for you, you’ll let me go.” His throat parched for moisture made his threat weak. His captor didn’t answer. Instead, he moved across the room in silence. From Ryan’s perspective on the floor, the man was tall, well built. But the coat could be adding bulk. A hard slap across the face sent tears to Ryan’s eyes. The throbbing of his head wound had subsided a little. The blow caused a resurgence through his skull. Still reeling from pain, Ryan didn’t realize what was happening until the metal cuffs were already in place around his wrist. The sound of a switchblade opening sent chills through Ryan. Instead of the pain of a knife cutting his flesh, the tension of the material originally binding his wrist gave way. Before he could react to the freedom of movement, a winch sounded and the metal on his wrists tightened as he was raised from the floor by the new restraints. The ache in his arms and shoulders intensified as his body’s weight pulled at already stressed muscles. “You know they’ll find me—” Ryan’s words ended with a groan as the winch halted. “You need to let me go.”

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The man refused to speak. Now at a level with his captor, Ryan tried to focus against the blinding light behind him. He couldn’t tell if the man was someone he’d seen at the club or not. His memories of the day hadn’t clarified completely but he remembered he’d gone to see David. The man didn’t seem to be quite as bulky as David but… “David, you can’t do this to me. We were friends once.” His captor snorted an almost laugh. Ryan hadn’t wanted to believe David would do this. But so many things could change in seven years. “Don’t you remember? You don’t want to hurt me.” The only answer was a waving knife. Bracing himself for a stabbing blow, Ryan clenched his teeth. Instead of pain, the cold blade slide along his skin under his shirt. The material split with an ease that testified to the sharpness of the weapon. Within minutes, his clothes had been rended into scraps of material on the floor. His captor picked up one strip and darkness descended again as he bound it around Ryan’s eyes. “Please, David. Don’t do this.” With only a swoosh of air warning him, the snapping sting of a strap of some kind cut into Ryan’s back. A scream forced out of his sore, parched throat. Another scrap of material, probably from his own clothes, was stuffed into his mouth. Soft footsteps circled him. Whispered words he couldn’t make out accompanied calloused fingers tracing the pain of the lash on his back. Then once again his torturer laid into his skin with the strap. This time, he didn’t stop with one.

***** “Left at the next corner.” Tony listened to dispatch’s instructions and relayed them to Jeff as he drove.

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March’s building had a garage behind it for repairs on equipment and vehicles. Evidently he had a car inside. Officers had found one of the bay doors open and empty. “Looks like he’s headed back toward the same neighborhood as the Paradiso.” “Would make sense,” Jeff mumbled. Tony punched the mute button on the phone. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have lost it.” “Well, March’s escape may have been the break we needed.” “But if he gets to Ryan first.” Jeff shook his head. “Don’t go there. We’ll be in time.” “Right on Fourth.” The directions led them to the March construction site. Only the foundation and an iron framework showed in the car’s headlights. Tony released the mute. “Are you sure this is the place?” he asked dispatch. “Okay.” “A building this size has to have a basement or subbasement.” Four police cars pulled in behind them then circled the building. “So we search.” “Detective!” A shout from an officer south of their position caught their attention. Running to the location, Tony spotted a white truck with the March logo hidden behind a heavy-duty construction crane. “Damn.” “Spread out and search for any entrances that lead to the basement,” Jeff yelled. “He has to be here somewhere.” Flashlights illuminated the path of the officers as they obeyed Jeff’s orders. Fear clenched Tony’s gut as he headed in a different direction around the site. He had to find Ryan before… He gritted his teeth and forced his thoughts on the job.

*****

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Ryan gave up trying to make any pleas around the damp material in his mouth. Each lash of the strap sapped what little strength he had left after his other injuries. Instead, he focused on Tony, on the warm embrace of his arms the night they spent together. Nothing sexual, just the comfort and closeness he’d enjoyed that night. Possibly the last night they’d ever have. His throat tightened at the thought. Tony would blame himself. He didn’t want Ryan involved in this case. Lightheadedness threatened even his memories. The pain seem to dull with each stroke. He knew he was losing consciousness. Probably would never wake again. He could just let it happen, not fight it. But then a vision of Tony’s face gave him strength to stay awake. The material around his eyes allowed a little light through. When darkness encroached again, Ryan couldn’t get the light back. Even with his eyes wide open behind his blindfold. “Damn,” he mumbled. He couldn’t lose it now. A man’s voice yelled. Vaguely familiar. David? But in front of him now. “Please.” Ryan tried to form the word but it came out as nonsense. A woman’s scream… A scuffle. More voices… A sharp pain in his neck… Darkness…

***** Tony found an entrance to the basement, a set of stairs leading into the darkness. A metal cover moved off to the side. “Over here,” he yelled to Jeff who was about thirty feet away. Jeff headed his direction, speaking into his phone as Tony started down the stairs. A woman’s scream echoed through the vast open area. Tony stopped to listen for the direction. A man’s yell led him toward a doorway. A large metal door with chains hanging from the handle stood open.

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The sound of a scuffle sent Tony in with his gun drawn. Two figures wrestled in the corner. In the center of the room, Ryan’s naked body hung from chains attached to the ceiling. One of the two men fighting groaned in pain and fell to the floor. The other lunged at Ryan. The flash of a blade near Ryan’s neck. Tony fired at the attacker. Bright red blood trickled down Ryan’s neck. “No… No!” Tony ran forward. His flashlight showed a nick in the pale skin. Not much damage. Footsteps clattered across the room outside. “Is he okay?” Jeff’s words barely reached Tony. Holstering his weapon, he wrapped his arms around Ryan’s cold body to ease the strain on his lover’s arms. Sticky fluid coated his back. Pulling one hand around to look at it, Jeff’s flashlight illuminated more bright red blood. “Get him down from here! And call a damned ambulance.” A quick search of the room revealed a winch with automatic controls. As Ryan’s body lowered, Tony caught his dead weight. A groan from the corner reminded Tony of the other man in the room. By now half a dozen cops filled the small space. One knelt beside the injured man. His flashlight showed March, his face bruised and considerable blood on his shirt near his waist. “Who is the other man?” Tony asked, his mind strained to find the truth. Jeff leaned over the motionless form of the man who tried to cut Ryan’s throat. “He’s dead.” He pulled a ski mask off the murderer. The pale face, makeup smudged and with a bruised eye, belonged to Virginia March.

***** Ryan pried his eyes open then slammed them shut. The moving room made him nauseous. Pain lanced through his head with the blare of sirens. Sirens? 92

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A warm hand held his in a gentle embrace. Squeezing the calloused flesh, he managed a small smile when it squeezed back. “Ryan?” Tony’s voice sounded like a choir of angels. He turned his head toward the sound. “You found me.” His voice cracked. “Of course I found you.” Lips caressed his temple. “I love you. I can’t live without you.” “Love you too.” Darkness swept him back into oblivion but Tony’s words comforted him as he went.

***** “How long have I been out?” Ryan asked when he saw the smiling brown eyes of his lover. “Two days. In and out. They’ve kept you on some nice painkillers.” That would explain the floating feeling. “What happened?” “Virginia March was our killer. She found a picture of you with David. When he confessed he was gay, I guess she snapped. She still had keys to David’s office and she evidently was using one of his trucks to pick up her victims.” “I think I remember that…” Ryan closed his eyes and tried to concentrate. “I thought it was David. Coming to give me a ride back to my car.” He shook his head. “When I got in, his face was covered with a ski mask. I started to get out…” He sighed. “Don’t remember after that.” “We found a lead pipe with your blood on it in her car. She’d parked the truck back at the construction company’s offices after she used it. Must have transferred the pipe to her Lexus.” Tony ran his fingers through Ryan’s hair. “She also had a little bag of sex toys which explains how the victims were raped. There was blood found matching two of the victims. The lab is running DNA analysis on the whips she used to see if they get any matches. I’m sure they will.”

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The soothing touch calmed his frustration over not remembering what happened. “How’d you find me?” “We had March in custody at his offices. He was being cooperative but…” Tony’s gaze dropped as he flushed slightly. “Well, I dropped my cell phone. While I was outside, he answered it. Not realizing he wasn’t talking to me, an officer reported that a witness saw a light blue Lexus in the alley behind his offices the evening you disappeared. David realized what it meant. Afraid we wouldn’t believe him, he escaped to come find you himself.” “How’d he know where?” “He has GPS tracking on all his company vehicles. He called for the information on any vehicle that moved in that timeframe. Eliminated the ones he and his foremen drove and zeroed in on the only one left. Which had visited the construction site shortly after you disappeared.” “There was a fight and a gunshot?” Ryan feared for David. “He’ll be okay. Took a knife to the stomach from his wife.” Tony squeezed his hand. “Those domestic disturbance calls? David wasn’t abusing his wife. She was the one doing the beating. He never fought back. Felt like he deserved it for deceiving her.” Tony shook his head. “When we went to her house, she had an almost healed black eye. I assumed March hit her. Tried to get her to press charges. I guess her last victim managed to get a punch in. The lab will see if they can get DNA off his hands.” Ryan closed his eyes. After what David had told him about his father, he understood the man’s inability to fight back. “And her?” “Dead. Shot while trying to finish you off.” Ryan nodded as his eyes threatened to close. “Wish I could stay awake.” “You have a severe concussion, loss of blood and some pretty serious lacerations on your back and neck. I think sleep is a good idea.” “Will you be here later?” Ryan whispered.

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“I’ll always be here. I love you.” Ryan forced his drooping eyelids open. “You do?” “Yes. I’m sorry it’s taken me this long to admit it but things will be different from now on.” “Different?” “No more hiding. Not about what I feel for you,” Tony smiled. “And not about who I am.” “In the ambulance…I wasn’t dreaming?” “No, you weren’t.” A gentle kiss graced his lips as his eyelids won the battle and closed. The thrill of hearing those words again made his heart race but couldn’t keep him awake. “Love you too,” he mumbled.

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About the Author By day, Shayla Kersten is a mild-mannered accountant. By night, she’s a writer of sexy romances. Torn between genres, Shayla writes erotic stories about hot heroes and their sexy women as well as hot men and their passionate heroes. A native of Arkansas, Shayla spent four years in the Army as a missile specialist, stationed in Germany and Oklahoma. After her enlistment was up, she spent eleven years in New York City taking a bite out of the Big Apple. Even her love of theatre and the nightlife of the big city couldn’t cure terminal homesickness for the Natural State. In 1995 she returned to her roots in Arkansas. Shayla now divides her time between her mother, her spoiled-rotten dogs, her dratted day job and her obsession — writing. And no, her mother doesn’t know what she writes. That’s between Shayla, her dogs and her readers!

Shayla welcomes comments from readers. You can find her website and email address on her author bio page at www.ellorascave.com.

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Also by Shayla Kersten Gaps in Your Soul The Cost of Eternity The Rememdiu

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