The Druga Family

THE DRUGA FAMILY MEMORIES Christmas, 2002

Mom, It isn’t much as far as a ‘physical’ gift goes, but I hope that you see it is an abundance in other ways. I could have kept this project going until we exhausted it, but to do so, would be creating a manuscript larger than any I have ever written. Think of this as a sample of a huge accomplishment in your life. When you read some of the words, you’ll really see how great of a job you have done with us. I love you, Jake

EMBARRASSING MOMENTS:

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OK, AT THE TIME THEY MAY NOT HAVE BEEN FUNNY. BUT TODAY … “WHAT??? COME, ON, THAT, DIDN’T HAPPEN …”

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THERE ARE MEMORIES THAT MAKE US SMILE, SOME TOUCH US AS WE KNOW 10 BUT NONE QUITE STICK OUT, LIKE THE ONES WE SAY BELOW …

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ABOUT US ALL

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LYNN DEBBIE MIKE JACKIE RON DAD

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WE ARE FAMILY …

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FLORIDA

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THANK YOU!!

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To put them all together in a way that you can see. That they are more than just mere pages, they are priceless memories. Gathering our thoughts and time was what it took To show you life binds us as a family like the pages of this book.

EMBARRASSING MOMENTS: OK, at the time they may not have been funny. But today …

RON:

Mom - making me take a roll of toilet paper, instead of tissues, to school to use as stuffing for my Easter project in the second grade. I remember having it in a bag under my desk and hiding it and pulling it out and Sister Daniel asking me what I was doing in front of the entire class. Dad - walking around the grocery store with the tail of his shirt hanging out of his zipper and everyone just staring at him.

JACKIE: Mom: When I was in first grade, I was in a play for Christmas, and I was a shepherd. Anyhow, all the other kids had the cloths over their heads, and a band, just like a good shepherd. Me? Mom put me in a burlap sack and made me wear a babushka. I asked her 'Why?" she said all good shepherd women stressed like that. I was horrified, I was the only kid wearing a babushka. BUT .... after watching ten commandments, I saw where she got it from. DAD: Daddy didn't care who he'd fall asleep in front of nor snore. His head flop back, mouth widen open and he'd snore ... really loud too.

MIKE:

Mom - She used to always embarrass me when I would be pitching and she would be in the stands yelling at me to stop pissing around and throw the ball over the plate. It got to the point where I would tell her when I was pitching and asked her to sit in the outfield at Hamilton Park. Dad - Drawing a blank for dad - I will have to get back to you if I think of one. (MIKE NEVER DID GET BACK TO ME!!!)

JOHN: Mom She always brought up my growing problem and no matter who was around, she always told people when I took my growing pills that the biggest effect it had on me is that my balls grew very large. Dad : Believe it not, when I was playing basketball at St Annes and Dad dropped me off at the parking lot with the coaches and my friends all there. He was talking to all the grown ups and when he pulled away, he ran over my foot. To boot, when I yelled , he stopped the car and still was in my shoe. I was fortune it that it was only caught on the tip of the shoe, but I was not able to move.

“WHAT??? Come, on, that, didn’t happen …” What is something you think Mom will say, ‘Never happened’ or ‘oh, you’re exaggerating.’ RON: The time when we went to Nana's for dinner and she had spaghetti and grated the cheese in the blender. I kept telling Mom that there was something crunchy in the spaghetti and she told me to shut up, that I was making Nana feel bad. I kept saying it is crunchy and finally mom slapped me across the face and made me go sit in the brown chair in the living room (the one with the giraffe next to it). It wasn't until Pap came home and started to eat and said "Dots what did you do to the spaghetti, it is crunchy", that they finally realized the blender had broken and I was eating glass. So I was eating glass, complaining about it and got beat because I wouldn't eat it.

JACKIE:

This to me was easy. I never remember Mom cooking. Now, I know she did. I know we ate. But I don't remember her ever preparing a meal. Nor, do I remember this GLAD cake she always boosts about. Ron, says it existed, I guess it did.

MIKE: Mom sending me to 2nd or 3rd grade with a big white bow tie on for picture day.

JOHN: I would say that Mom would always deny or say " she only mention it briefly " when describing the effects of the growing pills on " my boys "

There are memories that make us smile, some touch us as we know But none quite stick out, like the ones we say below … I remember … RON: The one night, Dad, Johnny and I were in the living room watching TV and Johnny had fallen asleep on the love seat. All of the sudden Johnny jumps straight up and screams "oh my god, get ! Kill it!" He was putting to the ceiling and a corner of the wall. Dad and I just said "What are you talking about?". He just kept yelling for us to kill it and he ran and locked himself in the bathroom. Dad looked at me and said "Do you see anything?" I said "Hell no" and we started to laugh. We even turned on the light to make sure there wasn't anything. Then Johnny came out of the bathroom awake and he said he seen a giant mosquito. JACKIE: OK, this is neither funny or touching. But it is a memory that will stick with me for the rest of my life, PLUS, I truly attribute this vision to my horrendous fear that I have of falling. We had just moved into the Blossom Hill house. It was Sunday and we were getting ready to go to St. Anne's for seven o'clock mass. The first time. Ron fell down the front steps of the house. I can still see him falling. Oh, my God, I remember how horrible I felt watching my brother fall. Head over heals. I thought he was dead. I felt so bad for him, I really did. And that bruise ...oh man.

MIKE: I remember one summer when all of us were upstairs, mom and dad were working and Johnny was down in the basement. All of the sudden, he comes upstairs and sits down without saying a word. Ronald goes downstairs in the basement to get something only to find water spraying out of the water line above the door at the bottom of the steps. Here, Johnny had hit the water line with a dart and did not tell anyone. Ronald called dad, who than had to come all the way home from the airport to fix the little pin hole in the copper tubing. I liked this one the best!

JOHN: One night Mom and dad woke Mike up to go upstairs to bed as he was sleeping on the floor in the living room. You must remember that our bed was a pull out bed from a couch. Well Mike went upstairs to bed half a sleep and flopped himself on the bed as if you were diving in the pool. Well to Mikes surprise, the bed was not pulled out and it sounded like a meteor hitting the roof. Mom, Dad and myself laughed hard for about a hour. I am struggling with question 4

ABOUT US ALL The earliest memory I have is all of us in the car ( station wagon I think)with Mom and Dad and we pull up to some place where Dad was keeping Fritzie1 and the dog greeted us at the car. I remember Mom petting the dog and all of us cramming at the window to see Fritzee. Daddy was outside next to the dog with a smile on his face. I cant remember the specifics but that memory for some reason stands out. Another is when you guys shut my finger in the door at brookline and Mom holding my finger flipping out while she was on the phone with Daddy. I dont know which one happenend first, but those are 2 eeeaaarrrlllyyy memories.

(John’s answer when asked to be specific about each person) **NOTE** All spelling errors are genuine spelling errors, and are left in intentionally for humorous purposes. More so because of John.

LYNN Earliest Memory Ron: “I remember Mom & Dad picking you and me up at West Liberty School, the day they brought her home and she was in the car. I also remember until that point we still didn't know what they had named her and that was my first question when I got into the car "What is her name?"” – Ron

Jackie:

My first memory was when me, Mike and Johnny were looking in at Lynn in the basinet and we knocked it over.

Mike: Her sitting on the living room floor with Fritzie eating cherios while dad fell asleep.

We say she inherited from Mom … Ron: she is mom. Can't pinpoint one trait because she has so many of them. I see her and remember mom when I was younger

Jackie: stubborn nature, and her neuroticism over cleaning house Mike: Mom's ability to balance work and family. John: likes to spend money, gets moody when cleaning We say she inherited from Dad … Ron: His temper and yelling ability. She is mom, but the temper is dad Jackie: To me Lynn is so all Mom, that this is difficult for me to answer. Love of animals maybe?

Mike: His love of animals. John: dads sense of humor

Lynn Fun Realistic and successful She isn't as uncompassionate as she likes us all to believe The baby Breasty, pretty Chasing "Am I getting old?' That she may have the marriage that lasts a lifetime Lynn --by Jackie

DEBBIE Earliest Memory Ron: I think I remember the day she was born more than anything. Because all of the others were born later and dad was never home from work during the day, but for her he was. I remember dad actually stressed to take mom to the hospital because it was in the afternoon and they had to take the rest of us to Nana's & Pap's before going to the hospital and Dad couldn't get Michael and John to stay in the car and he was chasing them all around the car and inside and out of it. I also remember that Debbie stayed with Nana & Pap for a little bit, because we were having the kitchen remodeled and they didn't want her around the dust.

Jackie:

I was so excited about Debbie being born, I remember watching Mr. Rogers waiting patiently for Daddy to pick mom up at the hospital. Nana made me toast with jam.

Mike: All I remember from early on was fighting with her. We say she inherited from Mom … Ron: her work habits and organization ability. She is so much like mom when she was younger, before mom went back to work, the way she cooks, shops and even her thriftness.

Jackie: Her brothers and sisters come first Mike: Cooking John: good heart, has to be right We say she inherited from Dad … Ron: when I see Debbie with little kids, I see dad. She may not admit it, and nobody else may think this, but the way she can win them over, is dad.

Jackie: the way she can whip up a concoction out of anything John: would do anything for anyone

Debbie Perfectionist Helpful and Bitchy Whenever you need help, Debbie’s always there to offer 5th child Pretty and Busty Proactive “You’re such a dick.” That God blesses her with a child, Debbie --by John

JOHN Earliest Memory Ron: The day he came home for the hospital. Remember mom telling us to look at his nose, that she swore they broke it delivering him. Also remember that day because mom wore this bright red dress with these big black buttons down the front home from the hospital.

Jackie:

OK, my first memory of my brother was total despair. I remember when he was born and Daddy woke me up saying, "I'm sorry, you have a brother'

Mike: Leaving Dairy Queen's parking lot and driving down Route 51 and the back door flying open.

We say he inherited from Mom … Ron: her gambling (the quirk), her temperament Jackie The love of the game Mike: Love of television and the poker machines We say he inherited from Dad … Ron: He is dad. Just like Lynn is mom, John should have been Ron Jr.. The way he walks, talks, mannerisms, the way he butchers names, everything, he is daddy.

Jackie: Christ, need I say anything here? Mike: The ability ot play practical jokes on people AND the ability to fall asleep under any circumstances and be impossible to wake up.

John A character Fiesty, Competitive I am closer to him than I have ever been. Middle Neat, Sporty Cleaning Tyler I am going to kick your little ass. To remain the way he is and enjoy life with his family. John --by Mike

MIKE

Earliest Memory Ron: I actually remember mom being pregnant with him because she had to got to the hospital to have here appendix out. But first memory is his baptism. Probably remember that because Dottie Lou bought me a record that day and brought it with her when she came.

Jackie: I remember Mommy being pregnant with him, but BIG pregnant, I remember not quite understanding what the big deal was. I don't recall him coming him from the hospital, but I remember looking at him in the crib.

We say he inherited from Mom … Ron: her sensitivity Jackie: the ability to be content sitting around and doing nothing but watching TV John: Locante modyness We say he inherited from Dad … Ron: he got all of dad's mechanical inclinations and has had them from the time he was young.

Jackie: his keen ability to fix things John: his love for dirty magazines

Michael Sensitive Persistant, Overwhelming Although it doesn’t always seem it, he always thinks with his heart Number 3 Husky, Imposing Repairing (Fixing) Did you make anything for dinner? Happiness Michael --By Ronald

JACKIE Earliest Memory Ron: I remember them having you laying on the table and everyone (mom, dad, nana, pap, aunt bea) were looking at your bellybutton and how it kept falling out.

Mike: Chasing Donnie Rienhiemer thru all the back yards with a brick. We say she inherited from Mom … Ron: Her strength and ability to accept people/situations Mike: She is so much like dad, that I cannot think of one thing. John: All dad. We say she inherited from Dad … Ron: his boldness, his craziness and the tireless pursuit of something that you want. Mike: Dad's imagination John: wackyness, not afraid to venture into the unknown

Jackie Wacky Adventurous, Creative She has always been there for me to talk to when I needed to talk. Oldest Sister Petite, Scrawny (lol…j/k), Blonde Writing I was doing a party and…..I am the only planned child That her writing turns out to be very lucrative Jackie --by Mike

RON Earliest Memory Jackie: 1967--watching Batman in the livingroom Mike: In 1972 seeing his 5-speed bicycle on top of the basketball hoop in Cranberry We say he inherited from Mom … Jackie: Her realism, and stability Mike: Mom's level-headedness John: good heart, moodyness We say he inherited from Dad … Jackie: go anywhere and do anything for his family, no questions asked Mike: Dad's ability to make-up all types of food concoctions and they taste great John: took over Father figure, the best complememt I could ever give

Ron generous Determined, smart I have always admired him Oldest Fit, 'smile perfect' moving "What do the kids want for their birthday?' One day a great love will come along for him Ronald --by Jackie

DAD Earliest Memory Ron: I remember him putting the plastic on the windows in the rooms at the Maggie Hoy's house that we lived in to keep out the cold weather. That was either before you were born or right after you were born. 1963 or 1964.

Jackie: my earliest recollection was Christmas 1966 and him pulling my hand away from the silver Christmas tree

Mike: Cranberry, 1972 - Dad getting the neighbor across the street in trouble with his wife for riding the motorcycle.

Dad Devoted Witty, Handy I will be forever grateful to him because he showed me how a father and husband should be. Father Lanky, Wiry Cooking 343 & 961 for 50/50 That he could be here to see all of his grandchildren and hold and play with them. He would have been in 7th heaven with all 11 (soon to be 12) of them. Dad --by Mike

MOM Earliest Memory Ron: Watching Days of Our Lives with her, when it first came on. I told her what I remembered about it one time and she told me that it was one of the first episodes and that was in 1964.

Jackie:

somewhere round 1966, her putting spit curls in my hair and hitting my head with a comb.

Mike: Getting rid of dad's corveer without getting any money for it.

Mom Generous Loyal, Loving What can you say, she is my mom, I love her. Mother Short (had to say it, sorry..lol), NaNa Gambling Steph, are we going to the machines? That she retires soon, so she does not have to sit in that damn traffic much longer. Mom --by Mike

WE ARE FAMILY … It's easy to remember the funny and the good They overshadow any bad, the way they often should The memories are plentiful, and they mean so much But I can't forget the times, when I was really touched ... From Ron … There was a time when I was down, and nothing seemed to go right, That was the time when Mom and Dad made the difference in my life It was when I lived in Florida and I was miserable and lonely and felt that I couldn't leave because it meant that I would have failed And they told me that I didn't fail and it wasn't a crime to come home. That no matter what I thought of the situation, the fact that I moved that far away by myself, without knowing anyone, made them proud that I was able to do that, and that they had raised me strong enough to do that.

From Jackie … There was a time when Mom and Dad made a difference in my life As a parent, I know the struggles a parent goes through to get their kids what they want. When you're a kid, you really don't know what your parents give up, or sweat it out over. I was never, ever, discouraged from following my crazy dreams. I wanted to be a rock star, mom and dad stood behind me as I left for the road. I wanted to write stories. Mom got me the typewriter, Dad stole me the paper, and they never thought I was weird (Or at least never said) when I'd disappear for hours in my room to write. They encouraged. Mom may not remember this: When I was 17, I sent my first story out. It came back rejected and I cried. I wanted to quit. Daddy, "said, if this is what you want, you have to get used to rejection. If you are gonna let it get you down, then you might as well quit.' When I was 34 I started submitting again, my first book came back rejected. I was devastated, and Mom said to me the exact same words. But then she added, "you should be proud that you people are asking to read your work. One of these days it will all come to you." I remembered her saying that to me on the street in front of my Wisconsin house.

From Mike … There was a time when I was down, and nothing seemed to go right, That was the time when my entire family made a difference in my life. It was when I was going thru my divorce and the situation with the person from Ohio And they were always there for me to support me and never judge me. For that I will always be grateful. It showed me how great mom, my brothers, and sisters really are.

From John … There was a time when I was down, and nothing seemed to go right, That was the time when my Mom and Ronald made a difference in my life. Nick was just borned and I was struggling to make rent and support my family. I remember Having $5.00 in my account on a Monday and needeing formula and diapers and not being paid until Friday. Without hesitation, Ronald went to Sams and bought ne a month supply of each. At that time, Mom asked me to bring Steph and the baby to her house so I can survive and get my finances back on track. Now I am on my feet and proud that I have come out of a huge hole. I owe it all to the both of them. Without them, I would not have made it. (I know this was not part of the poem, but it sums up a lot in my opinion, so I kept it in— Jackie) PS-- Jackie, if you need anything or any help, PLEASE do not hesitate to ask. I may not have much, but I would bite the bullet to help any of you.

FLORIDA In 1989, we all took a trip to Florida. All of us. I asked everyone to recount the trip and what role they played in it. Below are not only each of our accounts of the trip, but also are interjections and comments in each other’s recollection. When you see the ‘hand symbol’ that’s one of us being rude and interrupting. This picture is the ONLY one I have from Florida. I wasn’t going to use it, but Mike gave me twenty bucks to put it in the book.

From the mind of … Ron Well I remember we initally planned the vacation to get mom away, because it was the year after dad died. Well, it started out with Debbie crying at the airport and Johnny not wanting to leave Paula …

**John, “for the love of God, I was excited to go, give me a break” ... and that was before we even got on the plane.

*Jackie, “Why don’t I remember Debbie crying? I remember Johnny hiding in the men’s room before we went in hopes of missing the plane.”

When I think of that trip, I think about how nice it was for all of us to be together and yes it was crazy at times, aggravating at times, but overall it was a nice break and it was a good distraction from the anniversary of what had happened the year before. The moments that stick out in my mind most both involve Michael. The first one was when he lost his money on International Drive.

*Jackie, “When was this? I must have been wrapped up in my own world.” I remember how upset he was and how bad everyone felt. But the thing that sticks out in my mind the most, ist when we were leaving New Smyrna and heading to Orlando for the airport and Michael was following me on that 2 lane road and I passed that one car on that road and he did the same. He cut it so close. I remember everyone in our car yelling and screaming "Michael, hurry up! Speed up!!" We all thought he was going to collide with the car coming. And when we knew he was clear and he was be hide me, I do remember us all saying "What an asshole" LOL

*Jackie, “I probably said ‘what an asshole’, but over the car thing … again, something else I don’t remember.”

*Mike, “I think I made mom’s blood pressure rise that day” *John, “It appears Ronalds memory went out the window with his hair” What role did I play, I was the one who planned most of it. I got us the condos, I helped look for plane fares and arranged car rental. Debbie Locante I think helped me get the airline reservations. I probably made people miserable at times too, knowing how I am always the one who hates to be late and get into my moods trying to get everyone moving. I guess I was like the dad of the whole thing.

*Mike, “Not really, I remember landing in Florida, driving all the way to the condo, and then taking a shower, getting ready and you and I going back to Orlando to meet your friends at Manaquin Dance Palace”

From the mind of … Jackie Sum it all up: A vacation that meant so much to me. Everyone was there, everyone, it was a true sense of family. Moment: There are a few. I recall thinking that the vacation was God's way to render our entire family sector extinct. How he had great plans to have the plane crash and we all were gonna die. I also remember how bad everyone got burned (Except me). How Ron got stuck in the condo the second day with Drew.

* Ron, “I forgot all about that, since I got really burnt and Drew couldn't stay out in the sun too long, I stayed in the condo with him.” Johnny on the phone--constantly.

*John, “that was Debbie, not me.” Mike trying to flirt. Debbie's uneven tan lines.

*Ron, “And the joke being that her boobs shaded her stomach that is why she didn't get burnt there” The flying invisible bugs that bit us at night. Johnny getting drunk, passing out on the beach and Ronald and Billy carrying him back in before mom saw.

*John, “when in the hell did that happen ??

*Mike, “I remember that, I was in the condo when Ronald and Billy brought him in and laid him down on the couch. All he kept saying was that the room is spinning, the room is spinning.”

*Jackie, “Johnny doesn't recall getting drunk, passing out on the beach and Ron and Billy having to carry him in. He threw up all over Lyn's beach towel and they ended up fighting. He probably doesn't recall this because he was so drunk.” But the memory that sticks with me has to do with John and Mike. Every single day they'd go by the pool and watch the Super model girl, slide open her condo glass door, slip out in a slow strut, walk up to the sliding board, dive in, swing across, get out of the pool, flip her hair and go back in her condo. And every day Mike and John would argue over who could win her over.

* Mike, “All I remember is that there was a beautiful girl there, but I do not remember what she looked like

*John, “that had to be Mike, not me. That was back in Mikes hayday where he wanted to find out how many large girls he could date and dump so he could tell everyone hes been around” My role: I really don't think I played any role. Not even comic relief. I was the one sibling with children and was kind of the quiet one.

From the mind of … Mike All I can say is that I remember having a lot of fun except for losing my money and drivers license. I sometimes wish we could have done that again, only with all of our kids. Tell about a moment or moments that stick out in your mind about the vacation. I remember when Johnny and I were sitting on the sofa bed one morning watching television and throwing a tennis ball of the wall and after we threw it, Lynn walked by and it smacked her in the head on the rebound from the wall. Another moment was when I lost $200 cash and my drivers license, but later that night, mom gave it back to me because dad’s number hit on the Ohio lottery.

*Ron, “Nothing to add, I remember all that, and did remember Mom giving him the money back, but I actually forgot about Dad's number hitting on the Ohio Lottery.” My role was making everyone nervous because on the way back to the airport, I was passing a car/truck (can’t remember) and everyone thought that I was going to get them killed. They felt I took an unnecessary chance.

*Jackie, “About this point in the recollections, I am beginning to wonder if I was on the same vacation.” When I went to Disney World with Debbie, Dottie, and all of them, We were standing in line waiting for the tram to take us back to the parking lot and Matt was just a little kid and was crying becasue he had to pee really bad. Debbie got tired of hearing him cry, so she picked him up and lifted him over the railing and let him pee in the bushes. This started all the young kids peeing in the bushes. I remember I was so embarassed and afraid of us getting busted.

From the mind of … John The vacation to Florida is a time that I chearish because we did it as a whole family. I hope it happens again so my kids can expierence a vacation with MY family. The one thing that sticks out about the vacation is that mom actually let Michael drive the one rent a car and he nearly killed all his passangers when passing a truck in a 2 lane highway. I was in the car with Ronald so I seen it from the back window. To this day, I still think everyone in that car shit their pants. He will deny it, but it happened.

*Ron, “Complete truth” *Jackie, “He actually did. I had to remind him about it. Kidding. I still don’t remember this.”

* Mike, “As you can see from my description John, I remember it all to well.” I played absolutley no role in that vacation. I was there for the free trip to Florida. Knowing me though, I was there to make people laugh. It couldnt have been for my money or good looks.

* Jackie, “John, we all voted you to come along on vacation for your good looks alone. Trust me your humor at the time wasn’t all that great.”

* Ron, “Jackie what is amazing is your three brothers remember the exact same thing. I did not talk to either of them about it either. Also, so you know, Michael called me this morning to make sure I answered your question.”

*Jackie, “Even more amazing to me is, that Johnny hasn’t a clue that he DOESN’T have to hit the enter bar at the end of every line!!! There’s wrap around text now, John, you ass!”

THANK YOU!! When asked what we were grateful to our parents for and why, this is what we had to say … Ron -- I am grateful that mom and dad were....so tough/strict with me. Because now I am where I am today because of it. Reasonn: Mom was always tough on me when it came to my school work, education, work habits, work ethics. To this day, I still find myself crumpling up paper and throwing it away, instead of erasing, and starting over. Just like she made me do when I was in grade school. My work habits, ethics and drive, I believe all comes from that. Dad was more of the person tough on me when it came to life experiences. He dealt with me more on the lessons of life, rather than the lessons of the book. He made sure I was aware of what was out there and told me that I may have the smarts, but how I apply that knowledge is what counted. I am the oldest, the first, the experimental one, and I think they were tougher on me than any of the others. I grew up with them because they were only kids themselves when the had me. I feel the strength I have today as a person, is because of them being tough on me.

Jackie -- I am grateful for mom being so neurotic about the end of the world. I wouldn't have my imagination or strive to write about it so well. I am grateful to Dad for teaching me to be myself no matter how whacked out people think I am. Because of him I use my imagination to the fullest. Mike -- I am gratefull that mom made me do all the right/moral things when growing up and for allowing me to be a kid. Because now I am a better person because of her and want Allyson to have the same type of childhood as I had. I am grateful that dad made me realize what a real father is and how to act as a loving husband. Becaus now I have a daughter to raise like he raised us and a wife to treat like like he treated mom.

John -Mom, Im glad she made me take my growing pills because now I have big balls. Dad, Im glad he made me listen to mom because now I have big balls.